


As the Sky May Fall

by EirlysLavellan



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Action/Adventure, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Deadpool References, Drama, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Fix-It, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Marvel Universe, Original Character(s), Past Sexual Abuse, Past Torture, Post-X-Men: Apocalypse (2016), Slight Plot Divergence, Suggestive Themes, Suspense, X-Men References, X-Men: Days of Future Past References, X-Men: First Class References, oc-insert, slight AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:49:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 26
Words: 275,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27573368
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EirlysLavellan/pseuds/EirlysLavellan
Summary: [XPosted on FFN] Alice was always so sure of the way her life was going to go, however, her entire perspective is changed upon being forcibly added to the Avengers. After the Invasion of New York things quickly change and she realizes that everything she thought she was, is nothing close to what she ever imagined especially when she realizes that the man she had thought was dead turns out to be forcibly working for HYDRA as their Winter Soldier. She swears she will do anything to keep him safe even if that means going against the new family she has built. [Follows MCU][Rated: T/M]
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Original Female Character(s), Steve Rogers/Natasha Romanov
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	1. Beginnings

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> Welcome to my first ever fiction on this site! Just a few small house keeping rules for the fic ahead of you and I promise that this will be the only note I make for this :)
> 
> ~This fic has already been on FFN since March as this started as a quarantine project, so updates will be once a week until I catch up with the chapters I already have posted.  
> ~I will be focusing primarily in the MCU with small crossovers here and there between other movies that are not included in the MCU such as X-Men and others as the plot needs. The fic DOES have heavy base in movie dialogue so I apologize in advance if that's not your jam, but I hope you'll give this story a chance regardless.  
> ~There are darker themes that do underline a lot of my OC's background, but I do make an effort to put warnings at the beginnings of chapters where necessary, but if I do ever miss something that you feel could be sensitive or triggering please let me know and I will absolutely go back and place a warning! I definitely want everyone to feel comfortable reading this and definitely don't want to trigger anyone if I can avoid it as I cover a variety of questionable or sensitive topics.  
> ~For any topics of the X-Men, I will be using the movies (specifically X-men First Class, Days to Future Past and Apocalypse) as a basis for the characters especially in the case of Logan, Charles Xavier, Erik Lehnsherr and Mystique.  
> ~I try to do as much research as possible into these characters including basis in the comics as well as the actor's interpretation, BUT I'm certain I've missed things that could always make these characters better so if you have suggestions don't hesitate to let me know! However, with that said, please keep in mind that this story has been active since March on FFN and so I'll try to do my best to update or edit anything I can to make this story better on both platforms :)  
> ~As mentioned before that this story will follow the MCU, however, there will be elements of "fix-it" towards Infinity War and Endgame. I don't like changing much within the MCU, but there are elements that I feel could have either been better explained or made to truly be better and so I may change scenes and exchange them for early concepts or deleted scenes depending on what I find to be necessary.  
> ~I classify this story as an OC-insert, slight AU and Fix-it FIC.  
> ~My final house keeping note is if you have read most of the posted chapters on FFN please don't spoil it for those who may not have read it here and vice versa. Once both sites are synced with the updates I will be sure to post them near simultaneously so that everyone can enjoy the new chapters :D
> 
> Thank you so much if you've followed me to the end of this note, but all of this is important to get out there! The very last thing I will say is that obviously this is a work of fiction and I do not make any money from writing this (unless Marvel wants to hire me at any point then sign me up!). Any historical reference I make will either have a note stating that it was researched or it counts as historical-fiction. The only things I own is my own subplot to the MCU as well as any unrecognizable characters. 
> 
> I hope you guys enjoy~!  
> xoxo EirlysLavellan
> 
> P.S. HUGE thank you to **simmerandcry** , my dear friend from FFN, for convincing me to crosspost here. If you haven't definitely check out her story "Show Me Don't Tell Me" which is a poly Bucky/OFC/Steve story and it's incredible...also crossposted to FFN if you're curious, lol! 
> 
> **Official Disclaimer:** I am a poor college grad and am receiving no payment whatsoever to write this fiction. If I was, in fact, getting paid for this, I would not be a poor college graduate that I can assure you. All rights are reserved to Marvel, Fox Studios, Walt Disney Pictures and Columbia Studios as well as the amazing screenwriters, directors and producers, and actors who created this film. I only own the subplot as well as Alice Alexander and any other unrecognizable character throughout the plot.
> 
> **Other Warnings:** Spoilers, character death, violence, suggestive themes (such as sexual assault/self-harm) and vulgarity.
> 
> P.P.S. I apologize if this is a mess you guys, I'm still learning how to work this site! Please be patient with me while I figure everything out and work out the kinks :D Thanks you guys xoxo!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _As the Sky May Fall_  
_The Avengers_  
_01_

**October 2012**

Her knee bounced from where she sat with her arms crossed across her chest and her petite frame slouched in the chair with an air of both irritability and defeat. Her dark tresses fell in deep layers around her narrow shoulders making her look smaller than she actually was; the holes in her clothes, the dirt smudges on the fabric and her skin alike, gave way to her having been through something determinedly not pleasant. She glared around the room, taking care to study the armed guards to her left and stationed before the door leading out of the room she was in.

She had been surprised she hadn't been handcuffed or even detained properly; however, they probably figured she wouldn't try to run at this point. She had evaded their hold for a long time, but she hadn't been anticipating them coming after her with their top agents. The only thing that they had done was place her in a room with nothing more than a desk, two chairs and a clock. The only windows to be found was the one at the door where the guards stood, their hands on their rifles as a reminder that she was in captivity and not the other way around. Not that she wanted to escape any more than they wanted a problem at this particular point.

As much as she hated to admit it, she was tired. She was tired of running and tired of trying to maintain personas and guises and tired of attempting to stay hidden. She knew her mutation would be noticed eventually and it had only gotten progressively more noticeable as the years passed. Perhaps that was why she found herself sitting in a reinforced room with armed guards staring her down. She didn't seem to mind the stares, she knew for a fact she looked terrible and she looked much younger than she was. Looking down at her bloodied knuckles, she frowned. They had spared her no time to be treated for her health or injuries that their agents had inflicted upon her detainment, but it only served to remind her not to trust a word these people told her.

Her musings were cut short by the unlocking of the door and she frowned upon looking at the suit that had walked in, along with what she only assumed was the man responsible for her capture in the first place. The suit was a tall, fair skinned man with thinning light brown hair and kind blue eyes. He wore a pleasant smile on his face, despite the rather intimidating man looming behind him, and held a file under his arm. The badge on the inside of his jacket told her that he was an agent just as much as the ones who had detained her were and her guard immediately rose. The second man had dark skin and roughish features accompanied by a patch over his right eye with the tell-tale scars leading up his forehead and down his cheek expressing how he may have lost his eye in the first place. He wore all black and a trench coat, the badge and pistol on his hip did not go unnoticed by her and she frowned, turning her eyes to the other man as he sat down.

"Miss Alexander, a pleasure to meet you."

She withheld her snort of discontent and simply leveled him with an icy stare, "Why am I here?"

"Well," The agent began as he took the seat across from her and laid the file on the table. She did not need to look at it to know it belonged to her. "You're a person of interest."

"Why?"

"I'm Agent Phil Coulson, Miss Alexander and I –"

"I didn't ask for your name, nor do I care for it, why am I here?"

Silence filled the small room, the atmosphere tense and despite her eyes holding Coulson's she had noticed that the guards' fingers had moved closer to the triggers of their rifles as had the more menacing looking man that stood off to the left of the agent before her.

The man only sighed, his eyes softening and looking sympathetic, "Miss Alexander, I understand things are confusing right now, but please, we need you to cooperate with us. We could help you."

She only scoffed, " _Help me_ …Is that why you've been chasing me down the last four years and why, when your agents finally were able to catch up with me, engaged me in an unfair fight and brought me here against my will?" It was the first time she moved and it was only to sit up straighter in her seat, "I was living peacefully and working a good job, until you and your organization decided that I was more important than criminals that are wreaking havoc upon the world. No, why detain someone who _actually_ deserves it. But that would make _sense_ wouldn't it?"

"Alice Alexander, age 25 – apparently – daughter of Revolutionary War hero Major General William Alexander and known as subject 87563 –"

The young woman withheld a snarl and instead leveled her eyes at the man behind Coulson, who she decidedly did not care for upon looking at him, "You think reading things I already know are going to give me a reason to tell you anything? I'm more than aware of what you're trying to do Mr. Fury."

"Well, then…" Fury drew off as he stepped up besides the other agent who frowned in disapproval, his once light and pleasant expression completely gone from his features, "How is it a woman born during the American Revolution…a woman _out of time_ knows so much about _me_?"

"When you begin to notice that all of your information is being collected, you tend to do the same. I like to call it _leveling the playing field_." She frowned as she leveled the man with a disapproving glare and ignoring his accusation to when she was born. "Call it what you will, but for being a secret governmental organization you guys have terrible amounts of antiquated security on your computers and let's not pretend that we haven't already been acquainted."

Fury and Coulson looked to one another before the director turned back to look at her, "You're quite the danger to yourself and others, Miss Alexander; therefore we are forced to contain you unless you are willing to aide us."

"I'm listening," Alice frowned at the man, "But I don't see how I'm a probable cause of harm when I haven't committed any crimes nor have there been reports of me hurting anyone…unless of course you're tracing back to the 1700s, but I digress…other than that you have no right to hold me here. I would make your story count because if I don't like what I hear I am leaving and if necessary I will make sure you or your agents can't follow me."

"Is that a threat?"

She leveled him with a steely glare, her eyes conveying her intent indefinitely, "It's a promise, Mr. Fury."

Coulson cleared his throat, drawing attention away from the staring contest that had begun in wake of her declaration and especially her eyes. "If I may propose, Miss Alexander, we have a need for your abilities…are you familiar with the artifact known as the Tesseract?"

Alice paused for a moment before frowning in thought. Yes, she had heard of the item and she was aware they knew that information given that Howard Stark had mentioned her contributions to its study after World War II. Inevitably she wasn't able to find too much on the subject and hypothesized that any documents regarding it would have probably been destroyed after the gods allegedly left the Earth and merely stopped the search suggesting Howard to do the same after seeing what it had done under direct influence of Red Skull and HYDRA. It was strange to her that they would be interested in such an artifact as there was not too much known of it. Shaking her thoughts she returned her eyes to Coulson and nodded slowly, "I have, but only in passing…why is this something that you're interested in, if I may ask?"

"Classified," Fury nearly hissed earning a glower from the young woman.

"If you want my help, then perhaps you should reconsider who it is you're speaking to, Mr. Fury."

Coulson ran a hand over his face as the two once again attempted to stare the other down. Clearly this explanation was going to take much longer than he had first anticipated. When Natasha had told him she had put up one hell of a fight and had taken down nearly half of the men with her based on petty parlor tricks, he had known that she would be hard to persuade as she clearly did not want to be there. Then again, he wasn't anticipating a pissing contest between the director and young woman. "In an effort to keep us on track," He began with a sigh and once again drawing her eyes to him, "The Tesseract was found frozen when Captain America went down in World War II and we've been researching it ever since…to be honest, we're not entirely sure of what it does –"

"It was stolen before we could find out what it officially does."

She regarded both men carefully before rubbing her dirt-smudged forehead and sighing in what sounded like defeat, "It's an energy source…or at least that's what the SSR found after witnessing Johann Schmidt creating weapons with it for the Nazi party…well more accurately HYDRA." Alice supplied simply at the accusing look Fury had given her before her expression and tone had become dry and deadpanned, "I was a combat nurse and served with the U.S 71st field hospital and then later transferred to aid the U.S 107th, which I'm sure you both already knew otherwise I wouldn't have been any more use to you other than another lab rat."

Coulson nodded, "So you know more than you let on."

"I've been alive long enough to know not to trust everyone you see…especially when they're significantly younger than you and more trigger happy," She said as she shot a pointed look at Fury, "I most certainly am aware of what the Tesseract could do, but you've yet to answer why you were looking into it."

Fury leaned on the table and glared at her fiercely, "As mentioned before, it's classified."

"Say it actually was _classified_ , what would you need it for? And I still don't understand what this has to do with me helping you."

"We were in the process of researching it when the Tesseract suddenly started activating on its own. Soon after our facility was compromised the portal ejected a man who stole it from us after attacking and taking control of our men and one of our best agents…"

The woman nodded slowly as Coulson explained, her mind working quickly in an effort to draw conclusions. Coulson looked up at her and sighed deeply, his eyes pleading with her to accept their offer and to help them out. Alice thought he looked like a puppy with that expression.

"As we speak, our agents are in the process of scrounging up extraordinary individuals, such as yourself, to aid us in the endeavor to retrieve the Tesseract." The agent explained, "Captain Steve Rogers – who I'm sure you're familiar with, Bruce Banner, Tony Stark…all to help us stop this world domination from happening."

"And if I refuse to help?" Alice frowned softly, watching both men's faces for any sign of what their true intentions were. "What happens to me if I decide that I don't want to help you and I can list at least thirteen so far –?"

"We're asking you because you _can_ help." Fury interrupted, his eye seemingly softening around the edges, but not making Alice like him any more than she already did, "You have some strange psychic powers and you can help save hundreds of lives and stop a madman from taking over the world, and you're questioning _why_?"

Alice frowned deeply, her arms tightening over her small chest in a clear effort to keep herself in control rather than to protect herself, "I have my _obvious_ reasons, Mr. Fury. And I'd like to inform you that just because I cannot die does not mean I'm psychic and you know that."

"Nothing would happen to you…" Coulson interrupted as the director made to rebuke her comment, "We'd only be keeping tabs on you to make sure you're in control of yourself."

Alice considered this or a moment before sighing deeply, "So basically I'd never go back to living a normal life either way you try and scratch it." Coulson and Fury knew that she was not asking a question rather than stating the obvious. Both watched in tense silence as the woman considered her options. After a few moments, she released the tension in her arms and allowed them to rest on the table, "I'll help, but I have terms that I'd like to lay out beforehand."

"Of course!"

She regarded the now overly enthusiastic agent before frowning up at Fury, though she commented to Coulson first, "You're writing these down, Agent Coulson, because both you and Mr. Fury are going to sign it afterwards." It took a moment for the agent to pull out a pen and paper and earning a dirty look from the director, who had turned his eyes away from hers only briefly. "I am not, nor will I ever be, a member of S.H.I.E.L.D and therefore will not be treated as an agent, but as a private consultant. I do not take orders unless the situation calls for it, which will be determined by myself. I am not to be tracked, _at all_ , during or after my help is granted and finally I will need full clearance to information surrounding the project so I may help to the fullest capacity. Any failure to comply means me walking out the front door, Director Fury, and I would not push your luck as I can hold you on several counts of kidnapping, abuse and trauma."

Fury glared at her before nodding his consent. Alice simply nodded and signed her name after Coulson signed as witness to the impromptu contract before turning the paper towards the larger man. After another moment of staring at one another for a few more moments, Fury signed his name.

He had never anticipated leaning towards her so willingly, but she was right in her own way that she could technically have his ass handed to her on a silver platter. Then again, he did not mind the idea of this woman on the team as he was sure she would be able to keep the others in line.

"Welcome aboard Miss Alexander…we'll have accommodations for you shortly."

Alice only smirked, "Of course."


	2. A Reluctant Truce

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi and welcome to chapter 2! I realize I updated chapter 1 literally a moment ago, but the chapter is disastrously short and that's just terrible to leave it so soon! Anyway, I hope you enjoy and if you didn't read the note in chapter 1 please do as it's the most important one of the entire story! 
> 
> Have a wonderful day y'all and please stay safe~
> 
> xoxo EirlysLavellan

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_The Avengers_   
_02_

Coulson was quick to show the woman to her new quarters as well as provide her with clothing of her choosing and informing her that she would need to be in the main hangar in an hour to meet the team, having been briefed while still in interrogation room and she had nodded simply. Alice was unimpressed and sighed deeply, not at all fond of the idea that she was now being held within a floating aircraft carrier that served as S.H.I.E.L.D's mobile headquarters, but she knew when to cut her losses and suck it up.

Her first order of business was to take a well-deserved shower, which was attached to the room that they had placed her in, clearly a temporary room. With a brief roll of her eyes she moved into the bathroom. One thing Alice took care in was that she did not take more than necessary of anything, keeping her time in the shower short only cleaning the grime off of her skin revealing the light bronzing that was hidden beneath dirt and left over from the exposure of the summer's sun - washing her hair and face, she was mindful of every scratch she had accumulated in the fight with S.H.I.E.L.D's agents. A brief smile flickered to her lips as she recalled how easy it had been to take most of them out before that redheaded woman had come out of nowhere. She was positive she would run into her once more and definitely intended on returning the rather nasty scratch along her cheek which was settled into a bruise that had quickly formed after the fight.

Making quick work of her process she dressed and Dutch-braided her damp hair away from her face, allowing the tail to fall over her shoulder and rest against her flattened chest thanks to the sports bra and layers she had been supplied. The outfit that Coulson had managed to find her was practical; a pair of loose fitting cargo pants, typical of the male S.H.I.E.L.D uniform, and tall combat boots and a simple loose, gray crewneck sweatshirt. As she tugged the sweatshirt over her head she adjusted it, her fingers tracing the charm at her neck reverently her mind conjuring the visage of gun-metal blue eyes set within handsome features - a time when things were so much more simple - and she shook her head suddenly in an effort to clear those eyes from her mind. Glancing around the room she noticed a first aid kit set off to the side and decided it would make a proper distraction for her wandering mind and she moved to it, taking the gauze from the pack and began wrapping her bruised and scabbed over knuckles. Once she finished doctoring herself up she sighed softly, gauging that it was nearing the hour marker she had been given before leaving her room and roaming around the large mobile headquarters.

Alice was quiet by nature and had a bad tendency of sneaking up on people without realizing. She blamed her years of being consistently on the run for this particular trait, but it did have its benefits. Shaking her thoughts she moved through the door, glancing briefly at the guards on either side of the door before noticing Coulson sitting at a large conference table accompanied by who she could only assume was what they had managed to gather of the supposed Avengers, her eyes instantly finding Steve and feeling her heart drop into her stomach. Their last interaction had not been a pleasant one as the two had been grieving with loss and had said things that they knew would harm the other in an effort to alleviate their own heartache. Alice was not looking forward to being forced to work with him again, but knew that she had no other choice. At the sound of the door opening, Coulson turned and smiled widely at her, "Glad those clothes fit you! Sorry about the pants, I know they're a bit bigger than you had asked for but –"

"It's fine, Agent Coulson, I appreciate it."

After affirming her statement with a smile, she turned her eyes to survey the room she stood in. Clearly it was the bridge of the ship, multiple computers lined the walls and floor, a large wall of windows allowing natural light to spill into the room and conserve energy. Agents shuffled through constantly, completing their jobs which Alice deduced was the search for the Tesseract or the thief, whichever they managed to find first. She then turned to the table centered behind Fury and showing two men and the woman who had detained her watching her just as intensely.

Her brow arched at the look the redheaded woman was giving her, a frown marring her plump lips, "They already let you out of interrogation?"

"Yeah, no thanks to you." Alice commented with a lazy shrug of her narrow shoulders, her tone underlining her lack of enthusiasm with her situation, "I do have to say you've got a mean right hook though."

"You mean you detained her?" The smaller, dark haired man inquired. Her eyes met the deep brown of his and offered him a small smile, her lips quirking slightly in what she hoped was a friendly gesture. However, he was seemingly ignored as the woman leveled her with a stoic stare, her green eyes locking onto her hazel ones and expressing her disinterest in the younger woman.

"And you took out half of my team."

"Wait is she...is she a _criminal_?"

Alice turned her eyes to the man and waved her hand flippantly in a noncommittal gesture, "Not exactly important." She then turned her eyes to Fury as he cleared his throat.

"Miss Alexander, I'd like to _reintroduce_ you to Captain Steve Rogers," He gestured to the rather awe-struck man with neatly combed blonde hair. She remembered the man from her days as a combat nurse and nodded to him politely despite the tension settling in her shoulders and the twisting in her chest and ignoring the awed questioning around the term reintroduction. "Dr. Bruce Banner," She nodded to the man who had questioned her earlier before Fury then gestured to the redheaded woman who had detained her, "and Agent Natasha Romanoff. Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet Alice Alexander and she has… _agreed_ to assist us in regaining the Tesseract."

"Pleasure," She commented dryly as she crossed her arms over her chest and unknowingly drawing eyes to her bandaged hands. "So, what did I miss?"

"I was _just_ informing Dr. Banner as to why he is here," Fury commented, his eye glaring at her before he returned his eye to the Hulk. "Once we get our hands on the Tesseract, you're in the clear." Banner only frowned slightly, highly disbelieving of anything that the S.H.I.E.L.D director was telling him and for good reason. He had not gone into seclusion for no reason, in fact, after the events in Harlem, all he really wanted was to live the rest of his life in a remote area and in peace.

"Where are you on that?"

Fury turned to Coulson to explain. Natasha's faraway look to the monitor, showing the image of a rather handsome man that Alice didn't recognize was ignored, but did not miss the mutant's eyes. What hadn't they told her about this mission that they should have?

"We're sweeping every wirelessly accessible camera on the planet. Cell phones, laptops…If it's connected to a satellite, it's eyes and ears for us."

The Russian sighed heavily, "That's still not gonna find them in time."

"You have to narrow the field. How many spectrometers do you have access to?"

Fury frowned, "How many are there?"

Bruce folded his jacket, "Call every lab you know, tell them to put the spectrometers on the roof and calibrate them for gamma rays. I'll rough out a tracking algorithm based on cluster recognition. At least we could rule out a few places."

"Not to sound absolutely ignorant to what you're talking about," Alice interjected, "but who exactly are we looking for?" It seemed as if every head in the room turned to look at her and she blushed in embarrassment, though she kept her face as blank as she could, catching the redhead's disbelieving look and frowning, "What? It's not like Fury told me _anything_ regarding this mess." She grumbled defensively as she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Have you ever heard of Loki of Asgard?"

She turned her eyes to Coulson and nodded her head slowly, "I read about the Norse gods during the 1860s, why?"

Steve only frowned, "The 1860s?" Was this woman truly the same woman he had known during the war?

"He's the one who stole the Tesseract," Natasha informed and her tone dry.

"And you were going to tell me this _when_?" Her tone was dangerous as she looked between Fury and Coulson, Natasha's brow arched in disbelief as she looked to the Director and Bruce even looked suspicious, Steve's brows were furrowed in confusion, but portrayed no other emotion. Fury went to speak, but the smaller woman was clearly beyond reasoning, "I told you that I was to have _all_ information regarding the situation at hand otherwise my ass would be walking out that door. Now, I suggest you start talking or I'm hijacking one of your thousand dollar jets and I'm going back home." The bridge was silent with her words and she frowned, her eyes lightening to appear almost cinnamon-like in color, a clear sign that her anger was at a peek. "I only agreed to help you because it meant me being able to have some semblance of freedom to do as I pleased, and because you left me with little choice, so a briefing, with _all the details_ , would be most helpful."

It took nearly ten minutes to bring Alice up to speed and she pinched the skin between her eyes in an effort to stave off the headache that was quickly beginning to form. Steve watched her intently. It was clear that her help was not voluntary like his had been, if her reluctance to divulge on her own knowledge was any indication. She had simply brushed off Fury's questions throughout the length of his explanation of what had occurred and the possible dangers that could arise from it. Steve knew firsthand that the Tesseract was something that was not meant for human hands, which had been why he had taken the nosedive into the arctic as he had.

"The Tesseract, Fury, is a portal in and of itself." She lamented with a sigh and finally breaking her silence, her posture expressing that she was rather overwhelmed. "Magic, is what you would call it, but it has been clearly proven that there are other worlds besides ours within the cosmos…if the incident in New Mexico a little less than a year ago is any evidence of that. During the 1940s I saw what the Tesseract could do first hand, I'm sure Steve has _vivid_ recollection as well. After the war I worked briefly with Howard Stark to understand the unknown properties the Tesseract was potentially capable of and when I learned more of what it could _supposedly_ do I cautioned Howard from continuing. Whether or not he took my advice has yet to be seen, but I imagine – like every other scientist out there with a knack for ignoring logical sense – he continued his research."

"What are we looking at exactly?"

Alice turned her eyes to Bruce to see that he was clearly following her explanation the most clearly whereas everyone else was following barely if at all. "We're looking at something that not only can give us sustainable energy, an unlimited source of power as the Director has found out based on the findings of Dr. Selvig, but is _extremely_ dangerous. The Tesseract is an artifact of other worlds and was never meant to fall into human hands. The cult of Odin was tasked with defending the cube for centuries before it was discovered. Schmidt killed them all and took the cube and I'm sure if you review the SSR reports you'll know first-hand what the cube is capable of doing."

Fury frowned deeply, "And you found this out simply through research?"

"You would know that if you read my account of Howard's research," She commented with a sharp look at the director before sighing helplessly with a small shrug, "I'm a mutant who's had more than a few decades to figure things out."

Natasha stood from her crouched position and crossed her arms, "That's how you knew every in an out of Boston?"

"Yes," She answered simply. "I lived there through enough changes to know all the alleys and backtracked areas to know where you and your agents would spread out…sometimes the best way to avoid being seen is to hide where you know people will look first."

Steve crossed his arms, his brows furrowed deeply over his blue eyes, "This sounds a lot like witchcraft to me." He eyed the woman carefully, having immediately recognized her as she had stepped onto the bridge, though her hair was significantly longer than the curls she had sported during the 1940s and the woman who had seemed to have an easy friendship with his best friend. He took her in with skepticism and wondered as to how casually she spoke about her seemingly long life and knew he would have to confront her eventually. Alice merely sighed, a defeated look crossing her pretty features before disappearing as quickly as it had come in favor of her stoic and uninterested mask she seemed to prefer.

"It does, but it's a part of my mutation…the X-gene wasn't around when I was born and so I had to cover tracks as much as I could. You learn a thing or two when constantly being accused of being a witch and being driven out of areas after too long." She ignored the sympathetic looked she earned from Bruce as well as the confusion that seemed to settle over Steve's before shrugging carelessly, "Either way, it's given me time to look into things and see potential dangers and consult with others who share the mutations of foresight."

"Professor Xavier?"

She turned her eyes to Natasha and nodded slowly, "He was the one who discovered it and I thought he would be able to help me so I went to him. Though a powerful telepath he also has a knack for uncovering probable outcomes a person may or may not take...he doesn't have foresight, but a mutant in his employ does. What he had to say was more for my benefit, but you don't live two-hundred years to merely assuage your ego about things you can't change."

Steve frowned at the smaller woman, "So, Alice, I can see why the Director brought you in, but what else can you contribute?" She only graced him with a disbelieving look before rolling her eyes and turning to look at the Director, as if waiting for him to explain.

"She's also here not only bringing knowledge of the Tesseract and what we're exactly up against, but she managed to hack into our system with little effort and so she'll be used as tech support and will be helping Dr. Banner with whatever he needs."

Alice was not a fool and knew that the explanation, while enough to satisfy the Captain, was a direct and underlining order to her as well. _Of course I'd have no choice;_ she frowned before rubbing the back of her neck and looking to the rather timid man to see that he was shifting rather uncomfortably. She had read about the doctor turning into a large green mutant that had been dubbed the Hulk due to his continued exposure to high amounts of gamma radiation. She was perfectly aware of what had happened in Harlem and she was smart enough not to bring it to light. Despite the adrenaline kick that activated the Hulk, she was sure that she would get along famously with the doctor, finding that his work was quite fascinating despite her childish dislike of sciences outside her own practice. Shaking her head of her thoughts, she turned to look at Bruce before nodding and moving to stand next to him.

Bruce looked down at the shorter woman and sighed before looking back up at Fury, "Do you have somewhere for me to work?"

"Agent Romanoff, would you show Dr. Banner to his laboratory, please?" Natasha stood from her spot, but not before Fury turned his eye on the rather small woman, "Miss Alexander, you will be joining him."

Alice only nodded and offered a lazy two-fingered solute, ignoring as Natasha spoke specifically to Bruce about how much he would enjoy the new equipment. Her mind was currently absent, muddled with thoughts of what outcomes could possibly stem from the coming of Loki.

She was able to draw up an immediate two: either the team wins, or Loki wins, but the further she contemplated the more grey she began to notice. Alice was no fool and she understood that she was a quickly developing grey area the further her internal ethical debate delved. She held no desire to become a part of the nonsense that S.H.I.E.L.D wove in their consistent web of lies, however, her concern and initial concern is what the organization was clearly hiding. She was also aware that speaking her thoughts at the current time was unreasonable, but her gut was beginning to gather and twist in knots that stemmed from her own knowledge and experience about history and its tendency to repeat. Why else would Fury be so desperate to retrieve the Tesseract?

Bruce threw looks at the young woman from his peripherals as they followed the Russian assassin down the wide hallway, their shoes echoing in the current silence, though he noticed Alice's footsteps did not have the same sound as Natasha's which were light with her training. It almost appeared as if she floated down the hallway, but the way her body moved was more likely to that of a cat – a slinking motion she seemed to do without conscious thought.

She was petite, small and compact with a lithe frame and lean muscle definition. Her dark ash-brown hair was tied away from her face, save the thick strands that swept from her hairline to curtain her forehead and rest against her cheekbones, making her heart shaped face appear more angular and highlighting the slight dusting of freckles that seemed to blemish her recently-bronzed skin given the look of the slight sunburn on her pixie-like nose. Her eyes were a bright hazel that appeared like whiskey or cinnamon depending on the light and currently her eyes were more of a muted brown with her clouded thoughts.

The doctor was unsure as to what her true purpose was to the whole situation, but he was content enough to keep an eye on her; clearly if she was deemed a threat she would not have been placed within his vicinity.

Natasha dropped them off at the lab and immediately Bruce began his calculations, briefly noticing that Alice merely stepped through the threshold before looking around in both uncertainty and a barely restrained disgust. The doctor decided to attempt to break the ice with her as she did not seem unfriendly, maybe just a bit out of place, "The lab not your first choice of a college hangout?"

"I didn't really _hang out_ in college…" She murmured as she looked around tentatively, "I was too busy with a book to really manage to socialize and my lack of dying and superior intellect didn't exactly make me a fan favorite."

Bruce chuckled at her thinly veiled sarcasm, her tone rather dry and expression deadpanned. "What were you doing before this?" He noticed out of the corner of her eye that she had stumbled upon a pair of six-gauged needles and backed away in what he recognized was slight discomfort and barely hidden terror, so much so that she had to physically shake her head to bring herself back to reality it seemed. "I mean," He began to clarify as an attempt to ignore the reaction, "before S.H.I.E.L.D recruited you?"

Alice shot him a thankful smile for not bringing up her rather violent reaction to the needles she had stumbled upon, it was a childish fear she had yet to completely get over despite her occupation over the decades as a nurse. "Well, I was just trying to enjoy the one day of freedom I actually had…before S.H.I.E.L.D was so _kind_ to pluck me from my normal life I was working as a paramedic. It's simple enough, but the hours are long and take up a lot of time." She shrugged.

"Where'd they find you?"

"Boston." When Bruce shot her an incredulous look she shrugged again, "I've lived there on and off since the American Revolution, so it's the place I know best."

Bruce only smirked, "So you're sticking true to that story, huh?"

"If you don't believe me that's perfectly alright, however, it is true that I was born in 1753, November 1st if you'd really like to know, to one William Alexander and his wife Sarah Livingston and we all lived here in New York until the war began…by the time I was 17 and the war was in full swing I moved to Boston and there I stayed. You're welcome to look it up, I'm sure S.H.I.E.L.D found out by using a blood sample," She hummed in thought for a moment before waving a hand flippantly, "Regardless I'm sure if you trace my case file you'll find that there are no other relations in my line but William Alexander and Sarah Livingston, though perhaps their family tree would show up and my siblings as well."

Bruce barely looked up at her, noting immediately the clear end of the conversation and sighed to himself. He wanted to trust the seemingly-younger woman since they were going to be spending much time together in the foreseeable future and Bruce wanted to make sure that, given the opportunity, she did not try something stupid enough to anger the beast inside of him. That and the poor girl seemed completely and totally out of her element, almost appearing a little awed and fragile when she had first managed to step onto the bridge that afternoon.

"You'll get used to the surroundings, by the way."

Alice looked up from one of the screens she was fiddling with to stare at the man, a trimmed brow arching delicately, though she appreciated the turn of conversation. "I suppose…to be honest though, I'd much rather be home watching my disgustingly boring sitcoms and trashy reality TV." When the man laughed she could not help the smile that stretched across her lips.

"A colonial aged woman who enjoys reality television?"

"A woman's got to get her kicks where she can. I may be old, but I'm _still_ twenty five…I've got to act like it in most cases otherwise I stick out too much."

Bruce chuckled as he shook his head. She was a literal piece of history and she wasn't any different than Betty was. At the thought of the woman he sighed, saddened that things between them had gone so wrong so quickly and he fought down the wounds immediately. He didn't have the luxury of thinking about passed loves when he was in no better position than he originally found himself. Looking up he noticed the mutant staring at him knowingly, as if understanding where his mind had wandered and he cleared his throat before forcing a smile.

"And what kind of shows seem to peak your interest?"

Alice regarded him for a moment, taking the cue to ignore the moment in stride and shrugging once more. "Have you seen Cake Boss?" When he shook his head she gaped at him, "Big Bang Theory? Hell's Kitchen? How I Met Your Mother? Modern Family? King of Queens? Numbers? _Nothing!?_ At least tell me you've seen that HGTV show where they repair different parts of a person's house?" He had shaken his head to _every_ show she mentioned. "How is it that I'm literally _ancient history_ and I've heard of these things, but a man of this time has not?!"

Bruce only looked up at her with a brow arched, "I've been in Calcutta for the last few years."

"You have _no_ idea what you're missing!" Alice cried, effectively scandalized and earning another laugh from the doctor as the atmosphere lightened around them once more, "You know what? We're going to remedy this right now! I think out of all of these you'd appreciate the _Big Bang Theory_ the most."

The man only sighed in defeat, clearly this woman was nowhere near letting him begin his findings until he conceded with her demands, though it was a nice change to the more stoic and neurotic behavior she had shown him the last hour or so. "What's it about?" He rolled his eyes good naturedly when she threw her hands up in the air and danced in victory.

"Leonard Hofstadter and Sheldon Cooper are both physicists working at Caltech in Pasadena, California. They're colleagues, best friends, and roommates; although in all capacities their relationship is always tested primarily by Sheldon's regimented, deeply eccentric, and non-conventional ways. They're also friends with their Caltech colleagues: mechanical engineer Howard Wolowitz and astrophysicist Rajesh Koothrappali. They're self-professed nerds; all have little or no luck with popular women. When Penny, a pretty woman and an aspiring actress originally from Omaha, moves into the apartment across the hall from Leonard and Sheldon's and the usual sitcom chaos ensues."

"Sounds _wonderful_."

"Oh, it is." Alice grinned, though whether or not she was being sarcastic he couldn't tell, "I learned early on that I have photographic memory, so memorization of a synopsis is quite literally child's play. Anyway, it's a good show and the physics jokes are not only funny, but well placed and appropriate."

"I'll take your word for it."

"You've no other choice," She smiled, "Fury stuck me in the lab as tech support…there's not much else I can do unless he pulls me away for something else."

Bruce chuckled, shaking his head, "Oh woe is you."

"Egads it's so sad."

Bruce paused in his tinkering, his eyes watching as she used the monitor to search for the show she had mentioned and his brow rose, "Shakespeare?"

"Photographic memory," She sing-songed her answer without looking at him. "It's a gift and a curse unfortunately. I'm awesome for Shakespearean theater and analyzed his work around…" she paused to think for a moment before shrugging with humor flitting across her pretty features, "1752? I was twelve and had a tyrant of a tutor. It also doesn't help that I prefer older literature to modern literature and theory over erotica." She tinkered more with her screen before pausing, looking at the wall before her, "I'm sorry, I'm rambling."

He only laughed before going back to trying to calibrate a tracking algorithm for the Tesseract, finding that the more he searched the more labs had responded positively to Fury's orders that had technically been his own. It made his job much easier in the long run and knew that if he was able to bounce his frequency off of the labs he may be able to find the Tesseract before the week was out. A thought suddenly struck him and he looked up at the dark haired woman to see she was apparently lost in sudden thought as her finger hovered over the screen. He quirked a brow and waited for her to move once more before addressing her once more.

"Alice–"

"You're welcome to call me Al or Allie."

Ignoring her interruption he continued, "What can you tell me about the Tesseract?" He stumbled over his words as she turned to look at him with an annoyed expression, having explained it earlier and clearly not happy to repeat herself again. "What I mean is: did anything you ever read tell you how much radiation the Tesseract could produce?"

Her features relaxed into one of thought and he heaved a quiet sigh of relief that he had not angered the woman. Alice frowned for a moment in an attempt to recall the information she knew. "Well, from what Howard and I were able to learn, the Tesseract emits gamma rays that are similar to that of a sun or solar flare…or a star, depending on how you look at it. But –"

"But?" He edged in an attempt to prompt her to continue her thought as she seemed to draw off, her eyes once again unseeing.

"It has properties that go far beyond that. If you're asking me to tell you how to track it then you'll need to pick up on a signature of gamma rays that are similar to a summer day…it's a low-dose radiation that allows it to remain hidden." Bruce's brows furrowed deeply, noticing that her eyes had become glassy as if she was recalling some long forgotten memory, but he knew it was unlikely, though it did nothing to ease his growing concern. "It's a terrible artifact really."

"And you know this how?"

Alice turned her eyes to him and frowned slightly, "If you forget, Bruce, I've been on this earth for quite some time…as I said on the bridge merely an hour ago I was there during World War II when the damn thing was used to make weapons. The Tesseract is one of those artifacts that hold terrible power when used for the wrong purposes and even the correct ones." She explained, her annoyance with repeating herself clear on her face, but her voice was toned on patience, "There are thousands of relics spread across Earth and for those who participate in occults and their respective rituals and practices they're merely another souvenir to be collected. The Tesseract, ironically enough, is both not of this world and the most powerful of these relics."

Bruce stopped his fiddling with his monitor and pushed it out of his way so he could stare at her, removing his glasses from the bridge of his nose. They both ignored as the door to the lab opened and Steve popped in, glancing between the two of them. It was clear he had caught enough of their conversation to understand it was about the Tesseract and that Alice knew more than she had allowed them to realize earlier.

"I don't understand."

"I don't expect you to," She shook her head slowly, whether to hide her exasperation or to stave her weariness to explaining things she thought were obvious, Bruce was unsure. "Magic is singularly the most abstract of all creative forms and of science, as I'm sure you're aware. Throughout points in history across the globe there've been instances where practices dabbled into the occult and blurred the lines between arts and what we know as modern day science…alchemy is an example of this. As I've said before, I've had a lot of time to research such artifacts depending on where I was at that particular time."

"Meaning?"

"I take it you won't find it amusing if I say I was bored?" When neither man seemed to see the joke she sighed. "I became interested in it after World War II after seeing first-hand what they were able to do with the Tesseract. When Howard found the damn thing looking for _you_ ," She gestured at Steve, "I decided that learning as much as possible was necessary to help prevent future instances from happening. I wanted to understand why it had such a cult following and as much as I hate to admit, I wasn't disappointed."

Steve crossed his arms over his chest, "Wait, I'm confused…how does this tie into how much you know about it?"

"Well," She paused, her hand on her hip and her hazel eyes turned upwards in thought as she pursed her lips though it was not missed by the Patriot that she was uncomfortable with this topic, "We know it was discovered by Johann Schmidt – Red Skull – in a box behind _Níðhöggr_ in a sculptured mural of _Yggdrasil_ , in a church full of Viking warriors entombed within its walls."

"Right," Steve hummed as he eyed her, "I'm assuming you found that out during your research with Howard?" When she nodded her affirmation he waved a hand as if encouraging her to continue.

"If we want to go by Norse legend, which is what I spent the most time looking into, it belonged to Odin Allfather, the King of Asgard, and was lost during the last age of worship by men on Earth. _Níðhöggr_ is a dragon who gnaws at a root of the World Tree, _Yggdrasil_. In historical Viking society, _níð_ was a term for a social stigma implying the loss of honor and the status of a villain. Thus, its name might refer to its role as a horrific monster or in its action of chewing the corpses of the inhabitants of _Náströnd_ : those guilty of murder, adultery, and oath-breaking, which Norse society considered among the worst possible crimes…hence why _Níðhöggr_ appears at the very bottom of the tree and gnawing at its roots."

She frowned for a moment before continuing her explanation. She recalled information easily and swiped her hand over the screen in front of her, cancelling out the sitcom she had been talking to Bruce about and pulling up the image she was speaking of.

"The _Yggdrasil_ is an immense tree that is central in Norse cosmology, in connection to which the nine worlds exist. _Yggdrasil_ is attested in the Poetic Edda, compiled in the 13th century from earlier traditional sources, and the Prose Edda, written in the 13th century by Snorri Sturluson. In both sources, _Yggdrasil_ is an immense ash tree that is central and considered very holy. The gods go to _Yggdrasil_ daily to assemble tidings...or in prayer…I guess is the appropriate translation. The branches of _Yggdrasil_ extends far into the heavens, and the tree is supported by three roots that extend far away into other locations; one to the well, _Urðarbrunnr_ , in the heavens, one to the spring, _Hvergelmir_ , and another to the well, _Mímisbrunnr_ …"

When she finished what she considered to be a brief explanation of her beginning knowledge of the Tesseract, she looked up at both men to see they were staring somewhat blankly at her, though not unkindly and clearly impressed with her expanse of Norse knowledge, or at least, Bruce appeared impressed. Steve merely looked at her blankly.

"Sorry for the crash course, gentlemen, but I promise I have a point."

"Then make it," Steve frowned. Alice noted that he was not uncomfortable with her knowledge; he only wanted the information that was relevant to why Loki would want such a relic. The idea of Loki having the Tesseract caused shivers to creep down her spine like a tendril of cold fingers. For a fleeting moment she thought something had actually touched her to find that she was wrong and that it was merely a trick of her imagination.

"Fine then," She snorted and shooting the man an indignant look. Her fingers slid over the monitor easily as she brought up a picture of the Tesseract so both men could see. "I believe the Tesseract was hidden in this exact spot in the mural because it represents what could potentially occur if it falls into the wrong hands: murder, catastrophe, etcetera. Now, the Tesseract, like I was saying to Bruce earlier, is one of the singular most powerful artifacts in the Universe. Originally it was owned by Odin and left behind… _supposedly_. Historians are unsure whether it was intentional or not, but I believe it may have been stolen. A play of power of some kind, but," She drew off with a definitive frown, "it has the power to wipe out the entire planet. It can open rifts through space, which is clearly how Loki got here in the first place, if what Fury and Coulson have told me is correct, and can also act as an indefinite power source depending on how it's used. From what you and I both witnessed during the war, Steve, a shot from the Tesseract's power could easily disintegrate the human body as our bodies are significantly weaker than other beings throughout the universe…or at least I assume so given that gods apparently exist."

Steve nodded, "I remember that…when we broke into that HYDRA compound."

Alice frowned softly at the admission, remembering fleetingly that Steve was technically older than anyone in the room with the exception of herself and would have remembered the Tesseract's power with clarity as he had just been thawed out a few weeks ago. "Right," She commented with a deep frown tugging at the corners of her mouth. "So you understand why the Tesseract should never be used."

"It's why I got rid of it…or so I'd hoped."

Alice shrugged, ignoring the sudden bitter nostalgia that crested Steve's face in favor of continuing her explanation. "The thing about the Tesseract, other than disintegrating human-based life forms, is that it can easily control and demolish one's way of processing thought or will."

"What do you mean?"

She turned her eyes to Bruce and crossed her arms over her nearly flat chest, "The Tesseract has the ability to strip the mind and reformat it to either its will or that of another. It has the ability to show you untold amounts of knowledge and shove that information into your head in a period of mere seconds which could inevitably destroy someone and make them insane. And that's not all…"

Bruce looked at her with a frown, "What else can it do, Alice?" Steve's brow arched and his hands fell limply to his sides, noticing the way the woman shifted uncomfortably under the doctor's scrutiny. "This may or may not be important information that could help us save hundreds of lives."

"I'm aware of that," She sassed with a frown, her eyes narrowing dangerously, but otherwise nonthreatening. "It can't be held by mortal hands…anyone who does is decomposed and their remains are transported to another world, as the Tesseract is a gateway like I said. However, it does not react to elements…such as metal or wood. In fact, it reacts quite well to it considering the cube is compounded elements…among other space matter at least." Both men looked at one another once more, but Alice continued, "If you're going to ask me why I didn't tell you before when I was asked it's because I don't trust S.H.I.E.L.D, firstly and secondly, I don't necessarily care for speaking of it because it was something many scientists were after a few years ago and stretching as far back as World War II. I don't claim to be forthright with my information, but I am neither a liar nor someone looking to service those who want power, which is why I was not as willing to speak about the Tesseract before Bruce asked me."

"You think S.H.I.E.L.D wants power?" Steve questioned, incredulousness coloring his words as he stared down at the woman.

" _Clearly_ , otherwise I would have been forthcoming and honest with them. I admit to not having told the whole truth to Fury and the agents, but I have been honest with you both because something in my gut is telling me to be."

"Do you have any evidence to back that suspicion of yours?"

Alice eyed the captain with a look so full of annoyance and exasperation that Bruce almost laughed, "I only have suspicions currently, but I'd like to pose to you both the question of why Fury wants the Tesseract to be found so quickly." She cut Steve off before he could rebuke her point with a look that could slice through steel, "I understand it's with a hostile force, but why the half-assed information. You may be into taking orders without question, Steve, but I don't take orders from anyone…I've done it my entire life and I won't be doing it again."


	3. This is Gonna Hurt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey you guys!
> 
> From here on out there will be no new notes until the last chapter I post! I spoke with my sister and debated for a bit about whether or not I should simply post the chapters I already have up and then continue updating from the most recent chapter :)
> 
> Thank you guys in advance for your understanding and please enjoy the fic so far!
> 
> xoxo Eirlys

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_The Avengers_   
_03_

Bruce looked across the lab at the younger woman, content that she had seemingly dozed off soon after Steve had claimed he needed to get back to the bridge, the tension between the two palpable and it made him question the entirety of their relationship. It was unusual to say the very least, or at least he believed so.

She was intelligent, yes, though she almost seemed marred by the world in general. He had noticed that, multiple times throughout her explaining anything involving her participation in any historical event, her eyes seemed to drift into the direction of the six-gauge needles on the other side of the room. She appeared aged and much older than even Bruce was willing to give her credit for, but it did nothing to withhold his suspicions.

He would not admit it out loud, but the silence of the lab, while at one time in his life he would have enjoyed it, was almost too silent. Bruce had enjoyed her insistent chattering and short quips and her strange quirks as it allowed him to focus on what he was doing and to stave off his exhaustion. The young woman was someone he had not known for more than a few hours and she had already managed to break through his walls and into his better graces. It was not that Bruce was unfriendly, but the man could not afford to trust easily and allow his friendship to be earned easily either.

Pausing in his work, Bruce removed his wire-rimmed spectacles and placed them on the table. He looked to the monitor on his left to see that it was still calibrating the coordinates of the Tesseract before nodding to himself and stepping around his workbench to where the young woman was slumped over another counter. Her head was resting on her folded arms and her bangs falling from the braid she had secured it in hours before had loosened due to her earlier shifting and mussing during her sleep, curtaining her features.

Standing close to her he could see the extent of the damage she had sustained upon her detainment and ultimately her shanghaied alliance with S.H.I.E.L.D as the gauze around her knuckles was beginning to spot where he only imagined wide and open cuts had been made from her fight. He noticed, with her head turned the way it was, that she had a nasty cut that stretched the length of her cheekbone and was already bruised over, a scab closed over her eyebrow and a few other scrapes lining her arms and neck. He took the time to observe the tattoo on her forearm that began on the side of her wrist and stretched up to her elbow and he could faintly make out the words _Vivre à la conquête des craintes dans les parties les plus profondes de votre cœur car c'est là que vous trouverez la liberté._ She was beat up, that much was for certain and he was almost happy that he had not struggled when S.H.I.E.L.D had collected him, instead opting to go peacefully. Despite the marring of her skin she seemed completely peaceful and he nearly chuckled when she murmured something incoherently as she shifted once more and he decided that it would be a good time to wake her, only to stop as the lab door opened once more and in the frame stood Natasha.

She looked around the room before her eyes settled on the dark haired woman before sighing, "We got face recognition in Stuttgart, Germany…we're suiting up and she's coming with us for now."

"To detain Loki I'd imagine?"

"Precisely."

Bruce nodded before pressing his palm into her shoulder gently and shaking her, "Alice, you need to wake up."

"Five more minutes," She mumbled earning a smirk from the doctor.

"I'm sure you'd like that, but you need to get up."

Alice rolled her head along the length of her arms, her shoulders heaving with her deep sigh before peering up at Bruce with a half-lidded hazel colored optic, "Why couldn't you have been my annoying partner asking me to deal with a 10-50?"

"A 10-50?"

"Violent psychiatric patient," She dismissed flippantly as she ignored the smirk splitting Bruce's lips in humor at her half-conscious state.

Natasha took that moment to speak, "Fury wants you to suit up. We're heading to Stuttgart to apprehend Loki."

Hazel optics glared at the redheaded woman tiredly from behind the curtain of her long fringe that had gone askew in her slumber. "I thought I was being used for tech support," She groused tiredly before settling a steady stare on the Black Widow's curvaceous form. "Since when did Fury get off on ordering me around?"

"Since you reluctantly agreed to assist us," Natasha answered sharply before tossing the jacket that she had clenched in her fist at the groggy woman, earning a snort of indignation as the leather hit her in the chest. "It's a little chilly on the quinjet, so I suggest you get moving."

Rolling her eyes, Alice tugged the jacket onto her petite frame before standing and offering Bruce a small wave as she followed the Russian out of the lab. "So," She began after a few moments of silence and following the agent through the twisting hallways of the helicarrier, "considering I know next to nothing about any of you, wanna brief me on the famous Black Widow?"

"Not particularly," The woman answered sharply earning an exasperated huff from the dark haired mutant.

"I think it's hardly fair that you know so much about me and I know next to nothing about you," Alice commented after reining in her annoyance with the redhead. "Considering you detained me _and_ kicked my ass."

Natasha smirked, "You are rather terrible at hand-to-hand combat, I'll give you that."

"Gee thanks for the vote of confidence."

"You're fast though," She continued, smirking at the woman's sarcasm, "Perhaps with a little bit of training you'd actually be able to hold your own in a fight."

"You didn't exactly fight fairly either," She rebuked. "I would've stood at least a fraction of a chance if you had taken off those annoying pincer gauntlets you've got."

Natasha's trimmed brow arched, "A woman's got to know her strength in a fight…mine is using these _annoying pincer gauntlets_."

"I would actually say that you're better at hand-to-hand combat…rather, you like getting in close to your opponent and rendering them useless. I prefer long-range fighting as it gives me more flexibility and lets me utilize my agility."

"So what are you complaining about not knowing me for?"

Alice rolled her eyes as the Russian imputed the code to the quinjet's door, stepping beside Steve who had clearly been waiting for them to arrive. She did not offer the woman a retort, instead opting to get herself ready for what may come to pass. As a non-combatant Alice was worried only for her reluctant teammates, as she could easily be used against them if Loki was faster than she was. The three stepped into the jet quietly; Steve focused on the task at hand, Natasha moving into the pilot's cockpit and Alice trying to ignore the feeling of dread that was beginning to wash over her as she looked around the interior. Noticing a weapons station to her left she stepped forward and looked over her choices before settling on two handguns, a sniper's rifle and a retractable staff and slinging the harnesses into their respective places and outfitting the necessary ammo.

The flight was silent, each member quietly contemplating the impending mission. Steve turned his eyes to the newest member of the group and frowned softly. He quite remembered how knowledgeable she was on the topic of the Tesseract and while it concerned him, it was not nearly as concerning as seeing her again in general. He recalled the World War easily as she had been in the caravan that he had broken into outside of the Hydra compound in Kreischberg, apparently as a prisoner and he had been surprised by her reluctance to allow him to go at the base alone.

At the time the only physical difference had been her hair, which had been curled like most women who had worn their hair, and she had been missing her cap and her manner of dress – though he supposed that hadn't changed all that much either as she seemed to prefer pants to skirts. He suddenly shook the thought as the nurses on the frontlines did not wear the idealized dresses and skirts or even worried about their hair (most nurses he had seen had their hair braided and twisted into buns at the back of their necks or pulled back away from their faces by rags they managed to find) as they did in the USO adds for the war in order to get eager gentlemen to sign up. Alice had been war-trodden and blood-smudged just as much as any combat nurse he had seen during that time, but the utter lack of wounds at the time had made him suspicious given that she was clearly a prisoner. He had initially suspected her to be a spy given her general reluctance to give him reasonable explanations at the time, but seeing her sitting across from him now he knew that that assessment must not have been true. Had she been thawed from ice like him or was there a greater power at work? As ridiculous as it seemed, his mind drew time-travel as a conclusion since he couldn't come up with anything better to explain her appearance. His mind then circled back to the first time he had met her and he sighed to himself.

After they had broken out of the compound she had immediately seen to Bucky, talking to him as if she had known him for years and he supposed she had as they had been fighting in the war longer than he had been stationed overseas. While he had appreciated her help and had allowed her to check on others as soon as they had gotten back to the 107th, he had spoken highly of her despite her pleas to not be recognized. At first he had thought that it was merely an act of humility, but knowing what he knew now and seeing her alive and in the flesh before him once more, he was now certain it had been to protect herself as she traversed through time. He reflected on the conversation in the lab and found that he suddenly didn't know the woman at all and he found himself both angry and elated at the same time. Elated that someone he knew still seemed to look and sound the same but angry that she seemed so different, that she lied to him and to every one of the friends that they had made during that time. Steve was unsure whether or not to trust her and it was not because of her mere knowledge alone, but on the means of her agreement with S.H.I.E.L.D.

He did not know if she was really trustworthy at all considering who she said she was and it didn't help matters that she was already reluctant to help. What would prevent her from turning against the very people that was keeping her under such high scrutiny?

"You can stop staring at me you know."

He looked up at the sound of her soft alto, surprised that she had bothered to speak to him at all. After a few moments of regaining his thought track, Steve sighed. "I'm sorry; I'm just finding it a little strange that you were asked to come along."

A smirk twitched at her lips, "You're a terrible liar, Captain. I can tell you don't trust me and under the circumstances I can't really say that I blame you."

"And is there any reason why I shouldn't trust you? Why _we_ shouldn't trust you?"

Steve watched as she considered his question, her face nearly expressionless and the only hint that she truly was considering his words was the soft flickering in her eyes. After a moment her shoulders fell and her head lolled backwards as she peered at him passed her softly sculpted nose, "You won't believe any word I can offer without questioning my loyalty so perhaps there is reason you shouldn't trust me. However, I'd hope that, since we're on a mission to detain a seriously dangerous god you'd have more faith in me than what I can give my word on."

"That isn't what I asked."

"Isn't it?" Steve's lips fell into a scowl at her tart question, her eyes peering at him from where her head rested against the back of the seat, her posture vulnerable, open and relaxed even. "You asked me if there was any reason why you couldn't trust me. My answer was that any reason I give you, any reason at all, would undoubtedly be questioned until I prove myself to be trustworthy. It isn't all that hard, Captain –"

"Steve," he corrected sourly.

"Steve," she amended quickly nearly looking abashed before her aloof expression caged her features. "I mean no disrespect, but your distrust of me is misplaced. While I don't _enjoy_ helping the very people that have detained me, I'm not going to throw myself at the first person to oppose them and especially someone who is apparently hell-bent on enslaving the world."

"I apologize for insinuating such. But even you can see how I'm having a hard time believing anything right now."

Alice offered him a humorless laugh, "You insinuated it hours ago when it was revealed that I didn't volunteer to aide S.H.I.E.L.D, even more so when I revealed my true knowledge of the Tesseract and my origins. You fear what you don't know and I suppose I admire you for that. Though I have to admit: it's refreshing really…to be surrounded by somewhat enhanced people, that I don't have to pretend that I'm some normal twenty-five year old surrounded by others who aren't particularly normal either. Even during the 60's when people like me were more common, I wasn't quite like them…I was the only one that I knew of for over two- _hundred_ years and suddenly there's ten, twenty, thirty people with the same odd gene that makes us _vastly_ different to the majority of the population? It made me wonder if there was anyone during my own time that was like me, but I had been too reclusive to consider it…too afraid. Human nature is to fear things that cannot be explained and so it makes sense, your mistrust…my fear. But I can assure you that in order for us to work together on this; you may want to start pretending to trusting me."

Steve considered the gravity of her words before frowning deeply, "I can't say that I trust you fully, but I suppose for now I'll have to take your word for things."

"That's all I ask."

He nodded, "So is there anything I should be aware of before we do this?"

"I have some abilities, but I'm not any good in close quarters…as you know I'm mostly a non-combatant, but I know my way around weaponry thanks to the few wars I've been veteran of…I'll need to stay at a distance to be of any use since I have no formal martial arts training...but I can scrap with the best of them." She offered a humorless smirk as she checked over her newly acquired handguns. "The only way I'll be any use at all is if Loki's rendered completely weaponless…and even then that's a high risk chance."

"Why?"

"As I was explaining to Bruce earlier, while I can't seemingly die – not for lack of trying – as a non-combatant I can be used in hostage situation, but that's also a benefit since y'know the whole me dying is kind of off the table so you can use force if you have to." She rambled for a moment before shaking her head, "If he manages to get a hold of me and _kills_ me," she emphasized with quotations with her fingers, "I'll need time to put myself back together, but if I'm hit with the Tesseract…I'd rather not find out if I can avoid it."

"How is that even possible?"

Steve and Alice turned to look at Natasha who had spoken; her voice incredulous. The brunette sighed heavily before answering, "Mutant, remember? I don't exactly know how or why I can't die, but being that Loki's using the Tesseract, I'm sure he isn't opposed to using it as a weapon or that he's ignorant to its capabilities. That's _why_ I'm quite reluctant to be here and why I threw such a hissy-fit back at base when I found out what was really going on…I'm experiencing PTSD all over again..." She drew off and sent Steve a meaningful look which he mirrored for a moment before she continued, "Anyway, like I said, my strength is in long range…you get close enough, I can pin him down to allow you a better angle."

"We'll keep it in mind."

Natasha did not respond, but she had no need to. Instead she looked to the screen before her and frowned, "ETA ten minutes. You both may want to get ready for the drop."

"Parachute?"

Alice smirked at the offer, rolling her shoulders as she stood. "Just like old times right?" Steve did not have time to comment her statement as she hit the button to open the back panel and prepared to jump. After a few moments she jumped, hearing Steve call out from behind her but the sound was lost as the air began whistling around her. Pulling her chute she controlled her direction with the pulleys and releasing herself as soon as she touched the rooftop closest to an open plaza.

"Are you crazy!?"

She turned her head, offering the man a feline-like grin, "In a manner of speaking _._ "

Steve stared at her, his jaw dropping before grumbling incoherently to himself and earning an amused look for his trouble before Alice took out the binoculars from the utility belt she had equipped and bringing them to her eyes.

"I don't remember you bein' this glib." Steve quipped dryly before frowning at her and earning another cat-like smirk, but otherwise remained silent. The two remained unspeaking as she scanned the buildings, spinning around to catch the sound of people screaming. Steve's brow quirked before he stepped up next to where she crouched before frowning down at her, "What do you see? What's happening?"

"Plaza, main building go!"

Steve merely glanced as she began setting up a sniper's rig before quickly making his way towards a crowd of people with the god of Mischief himself standing over them in a way only a super soldier could. He was amazed at Alice's timing as he managed to land before a single man standing before the gold and green clad trickster, the latter preparing to blast the veteran for his insolence. He immediately brought up his shield as Loki released a bright blue blast from his scepter, the blast bouncing off of the shield and knocking the god off of his feet.

Shaking the force of the blast from his mind, Steve stood, looking down at the raven-haired man and earning a glower. "You know, the last time I was in Germany and saw a man standing above everybody else, we ended up disagreeing."

The god only chuckled as he stood, "The soldier. A man out of time."

"I'm not the one who's out of time."

Natasha flew in the quinjet and hovered in place, " _Loki, drop the weapon and stand down!_ " Loki's retaliation was to shoot at the quinjet, Natasha maneuvering away from the blast just in time. Alice had apparently abandoned her rig in favor of getting closer as she made her appearance among the quickly scattering people, grabbing a quickly stumbling teenager out of the line of fire as Steve maneuvered out of the way of a blast from Loki, nearly hitting the civilian instead. The mutant almost swore, but instead growled at the teenager to get his legs moving once more.

After the boy nearly destroyed her hearing with is scream she turned her attention back to the fight to see that Steve was faring worse than he should with his strength. It was as Loki grabbed the fist Steve threw at him and tossed him aside that Alice decided she needed to act began firing the duel guns in an effort to draw the god's attention.

When his eyes swirled to meet hers she suddenly realized she was in danger and began moving once more – figuring that a moving target was harder to pin than a stationary, but soon realized that close quarters was going to have to be what she settled on as the god advanced regardless of her shots and she swore again. She had warned Steve earlier to not leave close-quarter combat to her as it was her weak spot and that suddenly came to ring true as Loki grabbed a hold of her before she could swing her staff out in an effort to keep distance between them.

"Ah, how convenient," His voice brought her back from her daze in time for her to shed the leather jacket to free herself and avoid the swing of his scepter, "a mutant. How thoughtful of the soldier to bring you along with him."

Without waiting for him to swing again, Alice spun away and finally extended her stave as she turned carefully as he circled her. For every step to the side he made, she made one in the opposite direction. She could see his brow furrowing beneath the point of his helm as he clearly underestimated her intelligence, but it was his eyes that left her the most confused. There was a film around the outer iris that made his eyes appear a bright blue, yes, but she could tell it was not a natural anomaly. "While that may be true, you'll find that I'm much more stubborn than anyone you've managed to face yet, Loki."

A mad grin split the god's lips, "You know of me."

" _Don't flatter yourself,_ " She commented with a low growl of warning, mentally counting down from ten to put her plan into effect. She could see Steve closing in out of Loki's field of vision and she only hoped that she could give the Captain an edge if she kept the man occupied and unaware of his surroundings. "You are nothing compared to the people who have tried to capture me in the past and nothing you have to offer me will convince me to abandon my values either Asgardian."

"Oh, you _are_ well informed for a stain aren't you?"

"And you underestimate the beings you wish so strongly to control and in doing so you've already predetermined your failure."

As Loki made to speak once more she darted to his side, swinging her staff and making sure to aim for his helm as Steve threw his shield. She released a loud hiss as he grabbed her arm on her spin and redirecting her by the appendage and sending her crashing passed the patriot. Loki wasted no time in coming to arms against Steve once more, swinging violently and sending the Captain sprawling. As Steve attempted to stand, Loki placed his scepter to his head and growled smugly, "Kneel."

"Not today!"

A cry passed the god's lips as Steve spun, his instep connecting with his jaw and sending him stumbling back, though Steve's small victory was short lived as Loki spun on the silent Alice and fired a shot at her. Quickly the mutant moved out of the way, mentally sighing in relief as the blast did nothing more but singe a few of the hairs on her arm.

Within her staff lying useless a few feet away she swung a gun from its holster and firing at the god in order to give Steve enough time to get out of the way of the calculated swing of the scepter. She heard him cry out and smirked to herself in victory before she was forced to dodge and dance out of the way once more. It was as she came to a stop she noticed Loki's attention turned once again to the patriot to see that he had thrown him backwards without much effort and was aiming to blast the captain with the scepter. Alice raced forward and, with speed only gifted by adrenaline, tackled Steve out of the way of the blast, but not before taking the blast meant for the captain.

A burning sensation unlike anything Alice had ever felt before in her life screamed at her side and forced her to scramble away with a cry of anguish. "Alice!" Steve cried from next to her as her hands instantly moved to the point of most pain and she hissed between clenched teeth as the patriot's hands met her trembling form. His hand rested on her shoulder, the other hovering as if he didn't know where to touch as she groaned. "What can I do?"

"Kick his ass," The mutant grumbled before groaning loudly as the wound flared and pain engulfed her side. "There's nothing you can do right now…hopefully I'll be able to stop it from spreading." She explained through a few pants. "Get back in there Cap and give him a punch for me."

Steve looked conflicted before nodding as his blue eyes hardened, standing and jumping back into the fray. Alice stumbled to her feet and hid behind a planter in time to block herself from another blast before firing a shot back at the god and scooting further behind the planter to better cover herself.

Steve moved forward once again in order to deter the god from attacking his comrade, throwing his shield in an effort to pull Loki's attention to him and give Alice time to recuperate from the blast. She groaned holding her hand to the wound and attempting to get her breathing under enough control that she could force herself to focus on her mutation to begin healing the rather nasty burn that had been left in wake of the scepter's blast – only to frown as the injury seemed to block any attempt at healing.

With a deep sigh and forced concentration she pushed more of her energy into the infected area, happy that the burn had finally stopped spreading and instead began to ache around the very edges of the mark. Oxygen seemed to be too little for her as she took in air greedily in an effort to satisfy her lungs. The scepter's magic was definitely like the weapons Red Skull had created in World War II and it felt as if lead had been dumped into her veins. Shaking her ailments briefly at the sound of blasters unfamiliar to S.H.I.E.L.D's technology she frowned suddenly, recognizing _Shoot to Thrill_ blasting from the quinjet's PA system followed by a loud cry that came after a blast.

Managing to gather her feet below the rest of her body, the brunette forced herself to stand to see that Steve was no longer alone and that a man clad in gold and red armor now stood with his hands positioned to blast Loki into the next age.

" _Make your move Reindeer Games_."

She nearly cried out in exasperation and relief when Loki's armor disappeared with influence of his magic and he raised his hands in a sign of surrender. With a deep sigh she moved out from behind the raised platform and moved closer to Steve and the man, holding her side gingerly.

"Mr. Stark," Steve reluctantly greeted, breathy pants of exertion passing his lips. It was clear the fight had taken more out of the patriot than he had anticipated and the gold and red clad man briefly turned his head to Steve, his eyes, even from behind the facemask of his armor, clearly keeping Loki in his sights.

" _Captain_."

 _Well that certainly explains that now_ , she thought dryly to herself as she approached garnering the attention of all three males as Natasha lowered the jet. Steve, however, was the first to break the tense silence and noticing how she held her side tentatively as well as the charred bit of her shirt and the smell of burnt skin.

"Are you okay?"

"Peachy," she answered tersely, briefly looking down at the god and frowning at the scepter that lay next to him in thought. "I managed to stop most of the blast from spreading, if not I'd probably not be able to grace you with conversation."

Steve rolled his eyes, but it was Stark who commented, " _And who the hell are you_?"

"Alice Alexander," She answered with a brow arched in bemusement before sighing and making her way to the jet, "Well, I dunno about you boys, but I'd kill for a milkshake. Let's get going shall we?"

Steve moved away to allow Stark to pull Loki to his feet before catching up with her, placing a hand on her shoulder to stop her, "You took that blast on purpose." She noted immediately that it was not a question and she sighed softly.

"Yes."

"Why?"

She tensed as Loki passed her, his lips quirking at her discomfort. The two watched as he was strapped in and said nothing, only allowing Stark and Natasha to restrain him without protest. "Realistically, between the two of us Steve, which one of us was more likely to survive a blast that has been proven time and time again to kill instantly?" Steve searched her face for a moment noticing that despite her pain she held his gaze steadily, "Besides, if it's between me and you? I'd rather it be me…I've lived long enough."

Without waiting for a response she turned and continued hobbling her way towards the jet and leaving the patriot to consider her statement in silence before he too followed her to the jet. Gently, he took her good arm and swung it over his shoulder before dipping tentatively and allowing her to make the decision on whether or not she wanted the help. After a moment she lifted one leg and Steve scooped her up and carried her the remainder of the way before setting her on the small table off to the side of the jet. She murmured her thanks before gripping the table beneath her as they got themselves ready for take-off. In the meantime Steve continued to think on her words and found himself repeating them.

Is that truly how she felt and if so why?

**-0-**

"What's our ETA?"

Natasha turned briefly to look at the mutant, "About two hours, think you can sit that long?" The redhead's brow arched when the other woman snorted in a rather unladylike fashion, leaning against the seat that she was currently occupying.

Natasha had made quick work of saturating the burn with a salve and bandaging the mutant's side in an effort to keep it from not only hurting the woman, but to keep the smell of burning flesh at bay. Alice did not want to admit it, but the burn felt as if it was slowly decomposing her side and it had not taken long for even the Russian to become pale at the extent of the damage. She reckoned that it had burnt down to the bone of her rib and that had been what had put even Tony Stark off as he and Steve had quickly turned away while the agent was tending to her care. During that entire time, Loki had done nothing, but watch. It still unnerved her that he had done nothing but merely stare at her as if she was another piece upon the chessboard between himself and S.H.I.E.L.D. Shaking her head of the thoughts she answered Natasha's question, noticing briefly that her inquiry had been toned on concern for the woman's well-being.

"Yeah, I can last that long…it's the boys I'm worried about." She muttered, her hand still nursing the wound she had received to save Steve which she now cursed herself for. "They're antsy and Loki's staring isn't making it any better."

"No," Natasha agreed with narrowed eyes. "Unfortunately they're going to have to be as patient as possible. We're flying as fast as we can."

"I know that, but Stark seems to be under the impression that we're _cruising_."

"Well he's more than welcome to fly himself there."

Alice smirked before pushing off of her seat and moving back to where Tony, who she had been quickly introduced to, and Steve stood. They shot glances between each other and their rather gleeful detainee. She briefly heard Fury's voice through Natasha's headset and her muttered responses before turning as Steve bumped her side lightly as if garnering her attention. When she looked to him, his eyes were once again on Loki and she only assumed that it had been a mere brushing with his constant shifting.

"I don't like it."

"What?" Tony questioned as he turned his eyes from the windshield before them to look over to the flag-clad hero, "Rock of Ages giving up so easily?"

"Of all the nicknames in the world, _Rock of Ages_ , really?"

Tony turned his eyes to meet hers before he smirked, "Not creative enough for you Groundhog Day?" When Alice rolled her eyes Steve stepped in with a frown, his discomfort clear on his face.

"I don't remember it ever being that easy. This guy packs a wallop."

The genius only shifted on his feet, "Still, you are pretty spry, for an older fellow." Alice's brow arched as he turned and gave the Captain a once over, "What's your thing? Pilates?"

"What?"

"It's like calisthenics. You might have missed a couple things, you know, doing time as a Capsicle."

Steve frowned, "Fury didn't tell me he was calling you in."

"Yeah," The genius bit sarcastically, "there's a lot of things Fury doesn't tell you."

The mutant's lips puckered as she exhaled a soft whistle in hopes to break the tension that had descended between the two men, "Well then, tons of fun."

"What are you a comedian?"

"Don't we all wish," Alice remarked candidly.

Tony only shrugged, "And here I'd hoped you'd have some weird stint so I could make obscure Bill Murray references."

"Certainly not," She commented with a smirk as she crossed her arms over her flattened chest, "but I'm sure I can come up with a few for you… _Easy-bake_."

"Oooh, surprising…I like you."

The woman only rolled her eyes before frowning as Natasha sat straighter in her chair at the sound of thunder and lightning, the flashes illuminating the dark clouds ominously. "Where's this coming from?" Another rumble of thunder seemed to vibrate against the jet as it cut through the clouds and Loki leaned forward in what seemed like anticipation, earning the looks of both men and the mutant.

"What's the matter?" Steve bit at the god, "Scared of a little lightning?"

Loki leveled him with a bemused expression, "I'm not overly fond of what follows."

Steve immediately turned to Alice, "What does that mean?"

"Why're you asking me?" She questioned with furrowed brows, "I'm a nurse not a meteorologist."

"You're the only one remotely inclined to understanding him."

"Why because I'm _two-hundred years old_!? That doesn't mean I can predict the weather, Steve." She bit back scathingly as she turned her eyes to the windshield, all occupants of the jet jumping as something heavy landed on top of the jet with another clash of lightning and thunder.

In hopes of investigating, Tony attached his helm and hit the button to open the hatch of the jet only for another man to land on the ramp. Alice quickly observed him, surprising herself that she had not observed Loki nearly as fully as she was this man. He was tall, long blonde hair waving from his scalp and his blue eyes glaring at all occupants of the jet. Tony made to blast him only for the man to swing his hammer and knock him back into Steve, Alice practically diving out of the way to avoid the pileup. He grabbed Loki by the back of his neck and disappeared with the spinning of his hammer.

"What the hell just happened?"

Her groaned question went unanswered as Tony stood up with a groan, "Now there's that guy."

"Another Asgardian?"

"That guy's a friendly?"

Natasha's question went unanswered in favor of Steve's question and Tony only frowned behind his mask, " _Doesn't matter. If he frees Loki or kills him, the Tesseract's lost._ "

"Stark, we need a plan of attack!"

" _I have a plan_ ," Tony bit back in response, " _attack_."

Before anyone could stop him, Tony dove from the jet, his thrusters leaving a wave of heat to roll through the jet. Steve and Alice looked at one another before the patriot began strapping a parachute to his body. Natasha frowned from the front, "I'd sit this one out, Cap!"

"I don't see how I can."

"These guys come from legends, they're basically gods!"

Alice sighed, "I have to go with Natasha on this one, Steve, and this isn't a good idea at all."

Steve ignored her as he fastened the parachute to his chest, "There's only one God ma'am, and I'm pretty sure he doesn't dress like that." With that statement, he too jumped from the jet. Rolling her eyes, she looked back at the Russian with a deadpanned stare.

" _Men_."

Natasha huffed a laugh before turning the jet around and tracking Steve via the parachute he had taken before settling down out of range as the men fought the new arrival. After a few moments a loud _gong_ sounded throughout the area a blast of energy swept over them and rocking the jet. Once Alice had gotten her feet back underneath her she frowned waiting to see what would come of the small conflict. After a few moments the three men returned with Loki trailing moodily behind them and she offered a deep sigh before quirking a brow, her arm still cradling her side.

"Well, you boys feel better now that you've gotten the extra dosage of testosterone out of your systems or do I have to knock the rest out of you?"

" _Yeah okay and how much do you weigh again_?" Tony bit from behind his mask, " _90 pounds when wet_?"

Alice rolled her eyes, "Look who thinks he's a comedian." She then looked passed him to the blonde haired behemoth, "And you are?"

"Thor of Asgard."

"Well, Thor of Asgard, I'm Alice Alexander. Pleasure to meet you…so you planning on working with us now or…?"

Steve sighed heavily, "He's here to help."

"Ah," Alice nodded, "so this really was just a flexing of muscles. Glad I didn't waste my time then. Shall we?"


	4. A Hint at What's to Come

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_The Avengers_   
_04_

"I just don't get it," Alice frowned as she paced the length of the lab in front of Bruce who was currently observing Loki's scepter. "He _watched_ them fight, just relaxing like he was watching a sitcom."

"Are you sure he simply knew he wouldn't match them?"

She shook her head, her arms crossed tightly over her chest as she paced. Upon returning she had gone back to her make-shift room and changed into an olive green sweatshirt of similar design as her last one. It had already been laid out for her and she did little to question it. All she had assumed was that Natasha had called it in and they had already had a replacement for her. She had merely had enough time to tug it over her head before the medical staff had burst in and attempted to dress the wound. It was a mess of exposed muscle and bone and Alice knew, despite her mutation, it would scar terribly and she would have the reminder for the next several decades. After the medical team had "cleared" her, she had stalked off to the lab fully intent on ignoring Steve when he had tried to stop her in the hallway to talk. What about she couldn't be sure, but Alice hadn't been ready to speak to him and while a part of her felt bad for it, the other part of her didn't care. She had gone nearly seven decades without him, he could wait until the current threat was over.

"Let me see."

She sighed again and lifted her shirt to reveal her side where a large bandage was taped over half of her torso and midriff and nearly meeting on her opposite side. With deft fingers he removed the bandage, apologizing when she flinched away from the contact as the skin around the bandage was much more sensitive after meeting the blast of the magic-infused scepter. "The shot was meant for Steve…though I'm starting to regret interfering in the first place considering he has a god damned shield that had no problem blocking the blasts in the first place," She rambled as Bruce prodded the tender area. "I don't know too much about the scepter itself, but the energy that it holds is preventing me from healing with my mutation, definitely on par with the Red Skull's weapons so…Tesseract definitely bad for anyone organic, mutation or no."

Bruce shook his head knowing that despite the earlier tension between Steve and Alice that it seemed the mutant still considered them allies if not friends and the thought comforted him slightly. He glanced at her as he replaced the old bandage with a new one, now understanding that humor was the best approach to speaking with her. Despite being fatalistic and aged, she seemed wise enough to laugh at herself when necessary and that was admirable if nothing else to the man as he found himself to be very similar. "If I didn't know any better I would've thought you'd be a scientist."

She smirked slightly, "How many scientists do you know would willingly throw themselves in front of something to prove a hypothesis."

"Not many, I'll give it that."

She gave him a knowing glance and only smiled in reply before pulling down her shirt once more, the fabric falling to her hip loosely. Bruce nodded before circling back to the scepter and beginning his readings once more. Alice sighed and moved to the other side of the lab, her eyes drifting every so often to the scepter from where she sat behind another monitor. The two lapsed into silence for a short while before the sound of marching boots brought both of their attention to the hallway where nearly twenty armed S.H.I.E.L.D agents walked a smirking Loki down the hallway. Bruce removed his glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose to stave off the headache forming suddenly behind his eyes as he and the god of Mischief locked gazes briefly. Bruce then watched as Alice sat straight, her eyes following Loki as he disappeared around the next corner with his entourage and after a few long moments sighed.

"I think we should head to the bridge…"

"Yeah," Bruce nodded before following her out of the lab. The two walked in silence, clearly both lost in thought. They entered the bridge and stood, waiting for Fury's feed to begin as it was clear they were meant to watch what would be an interrogation from the room where they were detaining Loki.

" _In case it's unclear. You try to escape. You so much as scratch that glass_ …" Fury began as he imputed a code into the computer directly across from the cell that was suspended in the middle of the rounded catwalks by hydraulic rigs. Loki moved closer to the camera to peer below as air rushed through the room, the sound feeding through the screen that the group was watching from. " _Thirty thousand feet, straight down in a steel trap. You get how that works?!_ " Alice frowned, watching the god's reaction rather than paying attention to what Fury was doing, " _Ant,_ " He gestured to the raven-haired man, " _boot,_ " he gestured back to the computer, inputting the code and turning as the compartment closed once more.

Loki only smirked, " _It's an impressive cage, not built, I think, for me._ "

" _It's built for something a lot stronger than you_."

" _Oh I've heard_ ," Loki commented slyly before turning his eyes directly to the camera, " _A mindless beast, makes play he's still a man. How desperate are you, that you call upon such lost creatures to defend you?_ "

Alice ignored the looks that went around the table at the mention of Bruce's other half, the gazes uncomfortable and shifty before returning to the screens. She shot Bruce a look from the corner of her eye and nudged him gently earning a small smile in return, though he looked nothing if only amused at the jibe. Fury took a few steps towards the glass, Loki's goal accomplished as the man looked absolutely irate.

" _How desperate am I?_ " He asked incredulously, _"You threaten my world with war. You steal a force you can't hope to control_ –"

"Quite frankly," Alice murmured quietly, "I think he's the only one here who truly knows how to control it…"

"– _You talk about peace and you kill 'cause it's fun. You have made me very desperate. You might not be glad that you did._ "

"What do you mean?"

She turned briefly to Steve, who had apparently heard her, and shook her head. It was not the time for her to explain her theory and especially when Fury was far from done. She, in reality, wanted to hear his response to the accusations made against him and she was not disappointed. For the first time since Fury stepped into the room with Loki, the god seemed to react scathingly towards the words fired at him, though Alice could tell that he was orchestrating this conversation like a skilled composer, " _Ooh. It burns you to come so close_." He mocked, only bending forward to truly express the bite behind his words, " _To have the Tesseract, to have power,_ " He paused, his tone lightening as if emphasizing that he did, in fact, understand more about the Tesseract than any of them did, " ** _unlimited_** _power. And for what? A warm light for all mankind to share, and then to be reminded what real power is_."

Fury seemed at a loss of what to say and only scoffed, " _Well, you let me know if_ Real Power _wants a magazine or something_."

The screen went blank and Alice frowned softly, "In answer to your earlier question Steve, and for those who didn't hear what I said," She began before massaging her temples, "I believe the only person here who knows the true power that is hidden within the Tesseract and be able to remotely control it _is_ Loki. What I mean by this is that the Tesseract is a magical relic, one of the highest forms of relics, but powerful nonetheless. Being that the Tesseract is Norse in origin, it only makes sense that Loki, a _Norse_ _god_ , _would_ truly understand how it works."

"That does little to comfort any of us," Natasha grumbled from across the table as she leveled a cool stare on the mutant. "You said on the jet that you know more about the Tesseract than anyone else. What _haven't_ you told us?"

"A great deal, actually. As I have said before on multiple occasions, I've been on this earth for approximately two-hundred and seventy two years and have had more than enough time to understand things with natures such as this. I'm growing tired of repeating myself and having my loyalty questioned. I'd like to remind all of you that I have no reason to really be loyal to S.H.I.E.L.D and that I'm only here because I don't need this guy to take over my world. Quite frankly, I'd rather resubmit myself to become an experiment than live in a world that's under the rule of Loki. Hard pass on both of those options, thanks."

Bruce sighed as tension descended upon the room before he chuckled, "He really grows on you, doesn't he?"

Alice only shrugged, ignoring the look that Thor cast her from the other side of the room. Throughout the length of the interrogation the god had said nothing nor looked at the screen that held the image of his brother. The mutant had managed to learn much about the relationship between the two after they had landed.

Steve frowned, "Loki's gonna drag this out. So, Thor, what's his play?"

"He has an army called the Chitauri," The blonde sighed deeply, his voice rumbling like the thunder he represented, though it was clear to all that he was upset by the words of his brother. "They're not of Asgard or any world known. He means to lead them against your people. They will win him the earth. In return, I suspect, for the Tesseract."

"An army…from outer space?"

"I'm pretty sure that's what Thor's alluding to, yes." Alice commented from beside Bruce, her brows furrowed tightly together. Steve made to rebuke her sarcasm when the doctor cut in, clearly using the patriot's words as a jumping point to continue the conversation without fights.

"So, he's building another portal," He concluded quickly. "That's what he needs Erik Selvig for."

"Selvig?"

Bruce nodded, "He's an astrophysicist."

"He's a friend," Thor nodded in recognition. Natasha frowned from her side of the table, looking rightfully miserable as she turned her eyes to the blonde.

"Loki has him under some kind of spell," She explained before looking back down at the table, "along with one of ours."

Steve frowned deeply, "I wanna know why Loki let us take him. He's not leading an army from here." He shot a look at the dark haired woman as she made to speak, as if daring her to rebuke him on the subject only for Bruce to once again break the tension.

"I don't think we should be focusing on Loki. That guy's brain is a bag full of cats, you could smell crazy on him."

Thor frowned deeply, clearly insulted by the insinuation against his brother, "Have care how you speak. Loki is beyond reason, but he is of Asgard, and he's my brother."

"He killed eighty people in two days," Natasha fired back dryly as she leveled the behemoth with an icy stare. Thor only faulted for a moment, clearly at a loss of explanation.

"He's adopted."

Alice rolled her eyes, "Yeah because that's an excuse."

"And what would you have me say?"

She turned her eyes to meet the angry blue of Thor's before frowning, "I don't need to say anything in regards of Loki's character because I don't know him well enough to form an opinion. But if you're going to defend him then defend him and stick to it. There's no use coming up with excuses for him and defending him against one person if you're only going to let someone else smear his character. Not only does it make little sense, but it shows me little of your own merit."

Steve whirled to look at the young woman in anger, "You're really defending that psycho!?"

"I'm not defending anyone," Alice bit back, "I'm only saying that if you say one thing and do another it's no better that what Loki has proven to us this far. I don't care if he's the scum of the Earth; if you decide to protect the character against one person's opinion then you'd better be defending that character against any other person who decides to comment as well. This has nothing to do with Loki, and you of all people should understand that sentiment Steve or did I misunderstand the stories of the kid from Brooklyn that Bucky used to tell?"

Natasha turned her glare to the mutant, "So you're going to argue to that he deserves a chance?"

"That's not what I'm saying at all," Alice glared back with agitation and ignoring the hurt look that appeared on Steve's face, "Clearly I'm the only one here with any sense of unbiased justice and morals."

"I think it's about the mechanics," Bruce interjected suddenly as if he had not heard the arguments happening around him. "Iridium, what did they need the Iridium for?" He looked around and blinked when Tony walked through the door with Coulson at his side and answered his question as he went.

"It's a stabilizing agent," He then murmured something to Coulson who nodded with a smile before returning his attention back to the tense group, "Means, the portal won't collapse on itself, like it did at S.H.I.E.L.D." He then tapped Thor on his bicep as he walked passed him to the monitors, "No hard feelings, Point Break. You've got a mean swing."

Alice sighed deeply, "Your point, Stark?"

"Easy there Groundhog Day, I was getting to that," He smirked before tapping the screen and turning to the group, "Also, it means the portal can open as wide, and stay open as long, as Loki wants." Tony then looked around the room to the busy agents, "Uh, raise the mizzenmast. Jib to topsails." The room fell into bewildered silence at his words before Tony's eyes caught a man at the far end of the room, "That man is playing GALAGA! Thought we wouldn't notice. _But we did_." He then covered his left eye before looking around the room, "How does Fury see these?"

"He turns," Maria Hill, who had been standing off to the side of the room throughout the length of the discussion, answered as she stood with her arms crossed over her chest and her blue eyes watching the genius with thinly veiled annoyance.

Tony only scoffed, "Well, that sounds exhausting. The rest of the raw materials, Agent Barton can get his hands on pretty easily. Only major component he still needs is a power source. A high energy density," He explained as he pressed buttons on the screens as if bringing up what he was speaking of, Alice watched him carefully as his hand slid down the side of one of the monitors and he snapped his hands together to draw attention away from the previous movement, "something to kick start the cube."

She had to smirk at the antics. Stark was certainly a genius and if he was not his own boss she was sure he'd make an excellent S.H.I.E.L.D agent for he was easily able to talk anyone under a table to distract people from what he was actually doing. She could not help but admire him for it. When he met her eyes she nodded her head, hiding the smirk that threatened to split into a smile and she subtly gestured to her lips being sealed.

Maria scoffed, "When did you become an expert in thermonuclear astrophysics?"

"Last night." He retorted with as much sass as Stark was known for, Maria only frowned in confusion and he sighed, "The packet, Selvig's notes, the _Extraction Theory_ papers. Am I the only one who did the reading?"

"Does Loki need any particular kind of power source?"

Bruce sighed, turning to Steve to answer his question, "He'd have to heat the cube to a hundred and twenty million Kelvin just to break through the Coulomb barrier."

"Unless," Tony continued, "Selvig has figured out how to stabilize the quantum tunneling effect."

Bruce scoffed, "Well, if he could do that he could achieve Heavy Ion Fusion at any reactor on the planet."

Tony smiled, "Finally, someone who speaks English!"

"Is that what just happened?"

Alice frowned, "Unfortunately," she began breaking the happy moment between Bruce and Tony, "if he's gotten his hands on the iridium then he's already going to be that much closer to completing the portal and unleashing _Independence Day_ on us."

"Hey, who knew Groundhog Day understood science jargon!"

"You pick up a few things when you've got nothing better to do with your time, Tony." She shrugged.

Tony blinked before moving around the table towards Bruce. The man accepted the handshake from Tony, the genius removing his glasses as he did so and offering the doctor a genuine look of respect, "It's good to meet you, Dr. Banner. You're work on anti-electron collisions is unparalleled. And I'm a huge fan of the way you lose control and turn into an enormous green rage monster."

"Um…thanks."

"Dr. Banner is only here to track the cube." Fury enforced as he walked into the room, his eye on Stark, "I was hoping you might join him."

Steve frowned, "Let's start with that stick of his. It may be magical, but it works an awful lot like a HYDRA weapon."

"I don't know about that, but it is powered by the cube…" He then turned his eye to Alice, his glare scathing, "something our _consultant_ didn't feel fit to share."

"Firstly, don't act like you're the only one around here with trust issues and secrets." She rebuked with a scowl, "Secondly, I had no way of knowing it was directly linked to the cube until I got a good look at it."

"How'd you figure that?"

She turned her eyes to Bruce and sighed, "I took the blast from the _scepter_ ," she emphasized at Steve who ignored her, "and as it turns out, the blast immediately attempted to disintegrate anything that was of human composition – meaning me. My mutation is still fighting to prevent the burn from spreading, and without it I'd probably be dead at this point."

Fury frowned, "You looking to get out of this agreement that easily?"

"I'm offended you think so little of me and my character," She commented dryly, expression deadpanned. "I'd rather have taken the blast then let Steve here get hit and him not be here to talk about it. As unusual as my own mutation is concerned I can't heal other people with it. Unless I scrub-up, I'm not able to save anyone. So, on that note, if any of you desperately wish to speak to me, which I sincerely hope you don't, I'll be in my room." She did not wait for a dismissal as she turned abruptly on her heel and walked out of the room.

She was angry that they seemed to turn everything against her. Sure, Alice had not been entirely honest with them up to this point, but she could not make theories about the Tesseract if it could potentially endanger any of the gathered heroes. It was not that she cared about them, no, it was far too soon to be making such bonds with a group she wanted nothing to do with. But one thing that she could not live with was putting innocents in danger. With a sigh of frustration, Alice made her way back to her room only to stop as Natasha's and Steve's words echoed through her head.

They had accused her of defending Loki.

While she had not intentionally been aiming to defend his character, she had. Originally her only the intention was setting Thor straight. She had been on the receiving end of people defending her to one group and then enforcing the words of another and it was an injustice that Alice was intolerant of. They had alluded that he was a monster and while she could not argue that sentiment, she knew there was something else going on and something that the people back on the bridge had overlooked. With a frown set on her lips she changed her direction, heading to the detention level as opposed to the living quarters.

As she arrived she looked down at the keypad, confused as to why there were no guards at this door and she concluded it was probably the fear of more S.H.I.E.L.D members falling under the Asgardian's mind control, something she doubted he was actually capable of without the use of the scepter. Either that or Fury was frustratingly confident that the god was secure and she knew that was not at all wise, but what was she going to change? So far nothing, but making sure Captain America managed to live to breathe another day. As that thought crossed her mind she suddenly recalled the unusual sensation of something trying to peer into her mind as Loki had been escorted passed the lab earlier and as a reaction she had slammed down hard on her mental shields or at least she envisioned shields slamming into place hoping it was the same thing. Shaking the thought, she observed the keypad and quickly imputed a set of numbers that looked to be the most worn and smirked as the door opened before her. The detention level was empty and silent, the only sound was the door sliding closed and bolting behind her before everything once again fell silent. After a few moments of standing still she moved, her boots making barely a whisper against the steel catwalk that led her to the room where she knew she would find Loki.

From the archway she observed as he paced the length of his cell, stopping however, when he seemed to spot her in the archway. She had leaned against the doorframe in her observation, her eyes having followed his form right to the point of his halt.

"Come to visit me?"

"You would like me to say yes, wouldn't you?" She commented lightly as she pushed off of the doorframe and walked further into the room.

She did not speak as she stopped just before his cell, her hazel eyes appraising his form. He was tall, probably even in height as Thor, but leaner. His face was sculpted in sharp angles as if he had been chiseled from stone and was a work of art rather than a would-be god. His inky black hair was a stark contrast to the smooth alabaster of his skin, a near contrast between night and day, if Alice were to use an appropriate metaphor. His clothing made him look stockier than she figured he was, having been in close quarters with him during the fight. His clothing was simple, yet elaborate; with multiple patterns and use of cotton and leather, the stitching on both careful and clearly well done. It was garb fit for royalty and Alice could not place why it made her feel so suddenly nostalgic, as if she was being reminded of a time in her life that was long since forgotten.

She then met his gaze, finding that he seemed to have been appraising her as well, to see that there were hints of green in his eyes that were not there when they first detained him, though the milky film still remained on the outer rim of his iris.

Loki's sudden chuckle disrupted her observations and he smirked down at her, his pale lips parting to show well-kept teeth, "You like what you see?"

"I've seen better," Alice commented lightly, smirking when he seemed slightly stricken by her tone. "But I'm not here to flatter your looks good or otherwise."

"Then, pray tell, why have you come?"

She could easily detect the dangerousness that just barely hit the edge of his light baritone, his voice like smooth velvet, but with a twinge of gravel that made him dodgy. She collected herself quickly, her arms crossing over her chest, "To see what others claim you to be."

"And what would that be?" He questioned with an edge that Alice could not rightfully put an emotion to, "A murderer?"

"A monster, actually."

Loki flinched away from the word, his recoil almost visible, yet controlled as he used the movement to turn away from her, as if he intended on resuming his pacing. He could tell she was observant and that she was certainly intelligent. "I wonder then, why you've come."

She paused and Loki watched her carefully, "I'm not manipulated easily. I suppose I should be grateful for being cursed with a long life as it allows me to read a little easier between the lines."

 _Ah, so the real reason why she is here emerges_ , he thought to himself with a sly grin. Her face betrayed nothing, but he could tell there was a riddle hidden within her words. He suddenly realized that she had seen something that the others had not noticed. Perhaps this would help him rather than hurt him. "You waste your time then."

"Do I?" He watched her carefully once more, hoping that she seemed to pick up on his meaning. "I question no more than what is presented to me at any given time. I've been accused of defending your character just twenty minutes ago and I'd like to see if there is any worth to that unknowing defense."

Alice knew immediately that there were a series of double meanings to his words and it was something she was willing to work with as she knew there was something off about the god. She made a mental note to ask Thor at a later time about Loki and see if there was anything she was missing about his physical appearance, his eyes being at the top of that list. "I'll admit, this is a dangerous game you're playing…it can result in either your failure, as I mentioned to you back in Stuttgart, or it can result in your _freedom_."

"A perceptive little mutant aren't you?"

"I have a name."

He smirked at the bite in her tone, "But I prefer mine so much more."

"If I were to use the name I'd prefer to call you it wouldn't be anything particularly kind," She remarked icily. "I suggest you begin using my name or I'll begin the long list of names I've come up with for you over the last few hours." With her brows furrowed and her arms crossed she looked more like a mother reprimanding her child rather than a woman of authority speaking to a criminal, the idea amusing Loki more than he wanted it to, but he did little to hide that amusement from her in hopes to irritate her and smirking to himself when she blew a stream of air out of her nose almost violently. "I want to know why I'm not dead."

Loki's smirk curled and Alice was reminded off-handedly of the Grinch, "The Tesseract is working even now to destroy you. A wonder, I admit, I was not prepared for. Everyone else has perished."

"If I was looking to play games I'd mess with Cap's star-spangled tights, he tends to be awfully protective of them."

"The gem works to disintegrate organisms…the only reason you could still be standing is if you are more than you appear."

When his tone turned thoughtful, Alice couldn't help but become suspicious, her mind working to put pieces together out of the minimal information she was given. "You said gem…"

"Did I?"

Her eyes snapped to his to see the smirk working across his face into a feral grin. It was almost as if he wanted her to figure it out, but the mutant was wary to the price and frowned. "Look, I don't profess to be the most moral of people, but if you work with these people we could end up helping you…I'm sure Thor would be elated to –"

"Oh this is _rich_." He snarled, cutting her off and watching as her eyes flashed for a split second, "You come to me _professing_ that you question no more than what is, that you've been accused of defending my _character_ and wondering, foolishly, if there was anything worth that defense." He watched as her lips thinned, in annoyance or fear he could not tell, however, he did know that she was becoming increasingly uncomfortable. "Do not be so fast to judge one by their actions when it is something that is _worth_ fighting for. Your kind crave subjugation; crave the feeling of being told what to do and when it is appropriate to do it. You believe, because you are a _mutant_ that you are not tempted nor controlled by these variables, yet you still attempt to resist the inevitable."

Alice frowned deeply, "If you think you can rule a whole _world_ of _people_ that number in the _billions_ as a supreme being then you are more of a fool than I originally thought. Beings such as you, always believe that the universe is dictated by higher orders of the most powerful to the least powerful like it's some kind of magical food chain. Is this _you_ speaking or some other _master_?" When she snarled she knew she had her answer and despite this confirmation she continued, "The fact of the matter is, I don't know what you plan on doing, how you plan on leading your army here to Earth, but I can be sure of one thing. You fight, you will lose; try and hurt the world that I am from and hurt those who I care about and I _will not hesitate_ to kill you…even if it means me going down with you."

Loki only smirked, "In time you will see that I am more than right, little mutant. You will come to find that the people you so cared about, that you fought to defend your world with, will turn their backs on you for what you are… _who_ you are." His voice, while sultry and as smooth as velvet, mocking of concern for her wellbeing, was toned upon condescension and a guttural prowess that nearly left her squirming in fear beneath the stare in his unearthly blue eyes, "It is human nature; a selfish nature that ensures that only the self is unharmed, is nurtured and is preserved. Honor means nothing, sentiment _means nothing_. You will be nothing more than a broken tool in the end. Mark my words."

" _Miss Alexander_." The dark haired mutant did not move her eyes from Loki's as she stood, glaring at him, as the PA system addressed her and Stark's voice came over the intercom. " _Miss Alexander we need you in the lab…Now._ "

"Copy."

She frowned; lips pressed together as she turned from the raven-haired god and exited the room that was holding the criminal, making her way through the detention level where she was met by Tony. The billionaire only spared her a glance before motioning that they move to the lab. After a few moments of silence, and Alice brooding, Tony deemed the silence annoying earning a glower from the young woman. "You know, if I didn't know any better, Groundhog Day, I'd say that you're more complicated than the Capsicle and Big Red combined."

"You know, Tin-man, if _I_ didn't know any better, I'd say that you make these annoying nicknames up just to satisfy a childhood need of pissing off your friends. Kinda like how your parents explain how crushes in Pre-K work. If the boy is mean to you, it means he likes you."

Tony guffawed, "You're really something, kid. I like you."

"Oh, that's a relief," She commented dryly, ignoring the kid comment. "I wasn't aware that this was a popularity contest."

"You knew I hacked the systems and you didn't say anything about it, you're clear in my book."

She smirked, "As far as I'm concerned, Stark, neither of us owe S.H.I.E.L.D anything. Neither of us are exactly willing to help S.H.I.E.L.D and we're both equally suspicious. I believe this is grounds for anyone to be trusted."

"I don't trust S.H.I.E.L.D and I can see why you don't either." When her brow quirked he smirked, "I saw the footage of your _detainment_. That and my old man was a little more than obsessed with you...you and Cap, annoying if you ask me."

"Howard never did forget a woman, I'm so sorry he tortured you with stories." She sneered without any heat and earning herself a small twitching at Tony's lips for the effort, "And I'm sure you already looked into my file."

"So you're not going to be growing any extra limbs any time soon right, being mutant and all?"

Alice offered him a deadpanned expression, "Not likely...wrong type of mutation." The two passed the bridge and the brunette stopped briefly as she noticed Thor standing along the wide bay window and she felt a sudden urge to speak with him. Her need seemed to be apparent as Tony nudged her side, drawing her attention to him.

"Go. We don't need you in the lab right now…it was mostly to get you outta there before Fury noticed…that and I think the big guy could use someone to talk to that actually gets what he's saying."

"Thanks."

"Don't mention it," He commented with a shrug to her smile, "Seriously. Don't mention it."

Alice waved him off before stepping into the bridge, ignoring the eyes of the agents before coming to stand at the god of Thunder's left.

"You know," She began briefly as her eyes stared out at the expanse of black that the night sky provided, stars blinking further into the distance and drawing Thor's eyes to her slight form, "When I was really little…I'd look up into the sky every night and wonder about what lay beyond our atmosphere. What creatures there were and were they like me or vastly different?" Having lived as long as she had she had seen and experienced enough that she could sense the turmoil setting beneath the taut flesh and wound muscles of Thor's large arms and clenched jaw. "And then I discovered that I was so vastly different…unable to age and unable to die…I was resentful…jealous even." She watched the behemoth carefully via his reflection in the window, carefully assessing his expression, "But…as time went on I realized that my purpose isn't only to serve beings with more power than myself, but to act as a comrade, a friend, a confident and a protector. It is difficult though, growing up on a planet that suggests everything that I am is blasphemy of the highest order."

Thor remained silent next to her and her brow quirked. From what she had gathered thus far, the blonde Asgardian enjoyed speaking, to revel in the conversation and attentions others presented him with. His silence was not only strange to her, but it was concerning. He struck her as someone who could be dangerous to himself and others if left to think and fixate on a particular thought for too long. She was unsure how correct her instincts were, but she could tell that his mere presence upon the bridge, more for a lack of anywhere to go rather than by his choice alone, was discomforting to the S.H.I.E.L.D agents that were surrounding them. Their eyes drifted every so often to the pair of them and she immediately sympathized with the large off-world man. She was broken from her thoughts as Thor heaved a deep sigh, his eyes becoming downcast and his posture nearly slouching from the regal posture he had exhibited up until that very moment.

"You are wise beyond your years," Thor's deep baritone seemed to rumble, like the thunder of an approaching storm. It was not an unpleasant sound, in fact, Alice found his voice comforting to a degree as it expressed that he was a being of age that went far beyond herself and reminded her of herself all at the same time. "You appear young, yet I sense an age about you that is incomprehensible to those of Midgard."

She smiled slightly, "I've been told the same thing many times before, Thor, you are not the first to say such."

"Forgive me, as I am not very good company at present."

"You just found out your brother is trying to take over a world that has no knowledge of anything outside of our small bubble."

Thor glanced at her and frowned, "And this does little to bother you?"

"I've spent most of my life sitting in front of books; hundreds, upon thousands of books, in hopes of understanding what I am and why I'm so different from others. I'm older than any other person I've ever come into contact with…save two slightly out-of-place gods," She sighed softly, her arms crossing over her chest in a more relaxed expression and the god could tell that it was her own defense mechanism. He could read that she was uncomfortable delving into this aspect of her own self, but was attempting for his sake and it was not unappreciated. "I've found more than a fair share from the tales recorded by those who have lived thousands of years ago. Mythology and fallen civilizations say much about what has occurred in the past and also say much about what could happen in the future…Nostradamus is notably one of the most influential in this aspect, but I digress."

"You know Nostradamus?"

Alice laughed, "Not him personally, but of him yes."

Thor shared in her humor with a smile of his own, his arms remaining crossed across his chest, though his look appearing far away suddenly, "I have spent most of my years courting war and now that I am forced into this one, with the hope of saving your world from the horrors of mine and the hope that I can save what little is left of my brother, I feel as though time is fighting against me…I wish it to slow, yet it continues to speed on."

"Well, there's a saying that we use here on Earth that says that _time waits for no one_ …I've never considered our more modern day colloquiums to be appropriate, but this is one that most certainly stands to be true." Thor merely looked down at her before returning his gaze out of the window before them. "I went to see him," She began suddenly, "Loki, I mean."

"Why would you do this?"

"I…wanted to prove something and was met with nothing." She collected her thoughts before turning to Thor with a frown, "Thor, what can you tell me of Asgard…other Asgardians and of Loki…?"

Thor's brow quirked in disbelief, though she could detect the joy of her interest in knowing of him and the worlds outside of her own, "You wish to know everything?"

"Well," She smiled sheepishly, "anything you'd be willing to disclose."

"Then I will start with the basics, on Asgard we call ourselves _Æsir_ …though many other races do refer to us as Asgardians."

" _Æsir_ ," The word sounded strange on her tongue and at the Norse deity's nod of approval she could tell that she had not completely butchered the pronunciation, a small victory in her book. She then looked up at him again with her brows furrowed in confusion, "You say other races? I've read quite a lot about worlds that are quite different than Earth, but those merely come from fiction. Surely they don't exist"

Thor chuckled, again the sound reminding the mutant of rumbling thunder, "Aye, they do."

"Wow…" She drew out with a long breath, "and here I thought I'd lived to see almost everything."

"Tell me of what you know and I shall try and clarify the finer details."

Alice nodded and launched into a long explanation of what she knew of Norse mythology that had been documented on Earth and about races she had read about in fiction. Thor clarifying points here and there and giving her truth to theories that were not at all elaborated on, which Alice assumed was because those details were not known at the time of their documentation, though quick recollection had her remembering that the people of Northern European heritage, like many cultures throughout time had originally told stories via word of mouth rather than writing anything down.

She was amazed by how willing Thor was to give her the information and also how he explained each point. He did not assume she was unintelligent, though it was clear he enjoyed embellishing certain stories for more entertainment's sake rather than to give her an unrealistic view of each thing she mentioned. He was great company, and Alice soon found herself relaxing her stance next to him and enjoying her conversation all of the same. She concluded that Thor was genuine, much more than Loki was, and she could understand Loki's slights and why he would be jealous of his older brother.

Thor demanded attention in a conversation and did not allow his listener to drift off for too long and while Alice did not mind his company, she also found him to be rather overbearing, especially when she spoke of what she knew of Odin, his father. The conversation soon drifted to Loki and Alice was unable to resist asking questions, specifically about how he and Thor grew up before moving into his appearances. She considered all he said and nodded to the stories that he told, laughing where appropriate, but her thoughts had become otherwise occupied. After the long conversation a silence fell between the god and mutant and finally the blonde behemoth sighed deeply.

"I have considered your words from earlier this night…"

"Please tell me that I did not offend you," She sighed softly. "It wasn't meant to offend you but, I was merely…reminded of my own predicament."

Thor offered her a small smile, a strange look on his face as he appeared to be someone who was meant for large grins, "You did not, merely strengthened my resolve to help Loki in some way. Not many blindly defend one that they do not know and it was…refreshing to have one stand up for my brother other than myself."

"I don't know why, but something seems off about him."

"Off?"

"I could be wrong, but I don't think I am…my gut tells me that something is…not quite right. Loki may truly be out for world domination, but I feel like there's something more to it."

"As in he is not working alone?"

"You said so yourself that the Chitauri are not of any world known…so how did Loki find them? Why would they follow him?" The god of thunder fell silent as he thought and the woman frowned up at him, "I don't know, but there is something that is being overlooked about this whole situation and my after two hundred years my gut hasn't steered me wrong yet."

Thor nodded slightly, though his brows furrowed tightly over his cerulean gaze, "I will be sure to ponder on this, thank you Lady Alice…"

"Um," She began with a deep flush blanketing her cheeks with embarrassment, "Alice or Al will do just fine Thor, and thank you." Finally a yawn stretched at her jaw and she sighed deeply, "I will leave you to your thoughts…if you need me, I will be in my room or the lab."

"Fare thee well, my lady. I hope to see you on the morrow."

Alice only chuckled, "Me too, Thor, goodnight." With a fluid pivot on her heel she removed herself from the bridge and began the trek back to her room. She did not miss the looks that the other agents sent her nor the hesitant twitch of their hands to the guns. Her brow furrowed at this, but she otherwise did not comment. As she opened her bedroom door she frowned at the way the air seemed to move, alerting her to something being off and so she decided the lab would be where she would spend her night under the watchful, yet friendly gazes of Bruce and Tony.


	5. No Good Deed Goes Unpunished

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_The Avengers_   
_05_

**July 1943**

"Alice! Alice wake up!"

The brunette slowly peeled her eyelids open with more effort than she cared for and looked around before glancing to her left where the voice had come from. Next to her stood a pretty faced blonde wearing a loose interpretation of the regulation uniform they were required to wear. The small flecks of blood on the woman's collar told Alice that she had just gotten off shift and was only waking her because it was her own turn.

Sitting up, Alice pulled her coiled hair over her shoulder as she watched the woman across from her begin to clean herself up to get some sleep. After a few moments she spoke with her voice dry from sleep, "Morning Fiona."

" _Morning_!?" The woman seemed to laugh breathily as she dabbed a wet towelette to her long neck, "It's damn near half of seven! Cook's just finished brewing a new pot of coffee for you and Johana."

Alice sighed softly adjusting her shirt and adjusting the belt at her trimmed waist. They had all lost weight or changed with the war raging around them as well as supplies being shuffled around in an effort to feed everyone, but everyone knew that food was the least of their problems especially in the field hospitals closest to the fighting. Thankfully action had been quiet of recent, but everyone knew it was only a matter of time.

Now awake, Alice could make out the sound of the camp still bustling around them as off-duty men ate Cook's dinner – a pleasant change from the canned k-rations, so of course no one complained – and played cards or read letters from family, friends or loved ones. It was times like this Alice knew she should cherish for things were not always so quiet. Finally managing to wake herself up enough to function, Alice pushed from the bed and began getting ready for her own shift, making sure to fasten a clean linen apron around her neck and waist before fastening her boots and taking another towelette and beginning to clean herself up. The conversations around them seemed to be enough for both women as they each continued their own routine, though the silence was broken as Daphne stepped into the tent and sighing in what sounded like relief.

"I'll tell ya girls, I'm beat." She announced dramatically as she bounced her way passed the two women earning a giggle from Fiona and a smirk from Alice.

"Coulda fooled me with all that bouncing, Daph…"

"Oh stop she's just excited for the downtime," Fiona admonished with a glint to her blue eyes, "Besides she's got a little rendezvous with one Sergeant Joshua Delaney, little eager beaver that one."

Alice couldn't help but giggle as Daphne blushed slightly before smiling, "He's no eager beaver that boy. He's a regular ol' one with charm to boot!"

"Oh you hush," The blonde grinned again as she fluffed her hair, "While it's all quiet like we should really be focused on making sure we get some supplies."

Alice rolled her eyes, "You mean the supplies Doctor Harrell was supposed to get us?"

Daphne frowned softly, though it looked more like a pout on her full lips, "Now, don't you get all surly Allie. He's doing the best he can same as all our boys." When Alice simply rolled her eyes the voluptuous woman only huffed, "I heard him with my own ears I did. Was arguing with Colonel Gunter and everything. We're even running low on iodine!"

"I'll see what I can manage to find…maybe some of my mom's old tricks will help stretch supplies a little longer," Alice thought aloud to herself, brainstorming in front of the two women. When she looked back up at the two women she saw them both staring at her incredulously, "What?"

"If you can manage to find us a plant that acts like iodine out here in the wild, I'd not only be tickled pink, but I'd drop all forms of decorum just to kiss you."

Alice released a barking laugh as she lightly slapped the other woman's hands away as Daphne approached her making kissing sounds. "Oh stop you!"

Fiona giggled as she watched their antics. Johana was normally a part of the banter as well, but she had woken before Alice in an effort to get to the coffee pot faster and manage a decent helping before the start of her shift. The four women had grown close over the last few months, being forced to learn the army's practices on top of their own duties and it warmed Alice's heart to find such as she normally found cliques of women to normally be off-putting and cumbersome. The relationship was easy and it showed in their work and it made everything easier for both patients as well as the women on shift. They had been divided into two groups based on experience as well as application under pressure to play into the strengths of each woman on the shift.

A sly smile suddenly took over Fiona's face as she eyed the dark haired woman still laughing over Daphne's banter, a look suddenly passing between the two as Daphne stepped back and allowed Alice to continue getting ready. "Besides…I happen to know a certain Sargent who's also been keeping eyes on you little miss Alice."

The brunette sat up from where she had bent over the water basin to wash her face, drying her skin and frowning, "Me?"

"Yes _you,_ silly!" Daphne giggled as a wicked gleam passed between her a Fiona and while Alice knew they were merely messing around, she knew the look was one that she would soon regret as she sighed and tossed the towel onto her bed and began fixing herself up.

"And who _exactly_ is this _Sargent_. I'd certainly hope it's not your precious Joshua Delaney." The mutant whispered in horror as she mocked the two women.

"Oh, you know, swell looking guy." A grin passed between the two women as Daphne continued, "He's tall, dark hair just a smidge lighter than yours with these killer blue eyes." Alice frowned openly as she tried to dissect the description and she couldn't think of anyone by the description off the top of her head.

Fiona giggled again, "He's a fella from _New York_. A real nice cut of the jib…if ya know what I'm saying!"

"Oh for the love of –" Alice huffed, repinning her bun for the third time and sighing in exasperation, "I haven't the foggiest who you ladies are even talking about!"

Daphne smirked, crossing her arms as she leaned against the beam holding their tent up, "You mean that hunk who tried so desperately to get your attention last night while you were resupplying the bay?"

A groan instantly found its way passed her lips before she rolled her eyes heavenly as if in prayer before continuing her routine. "I believe you girls are _sorely_ mistaken."

"By that groan I don't believe we were!"

Grumbling under her breath Alice swore before pinching her cheeks in an effort to regain some color to her face from the pale flesh that looked lackluster with her lack of sleep. While she was able to work longer hours thanks to her mutation she did require at least a few hours to recharge and lately that was getting harder and harder as they were needed more and more. Normally the women could manage two a shift at a time, but there had been times when regardless of shift it had been all hands on deck and those hours were beginning to show in the pallor of her skin.

"You know," Fiona grinned as she sided next to the shorter woman, her blue eyes alight with mischief, "he certainly is a looker and that accent? Sweet lord, it's almost as cute as yours!"

"Alright well if you two want to get all sweet on him, be my guest," Alice snorted as she looked at the woman over her shoulder from their image in the looking glass. "I, for one, am not looking for any type of canoodling."

"Nor should you if that's what you want," Johana spoke smartly as she stepped back into the tent and took in the scene before her and nearly laughing at the doe-eyed look Alice shot her in her gratitude. "Now, c'mon, we've got a shift to get to and you still haven't gotten your coffee or helping. I saved you some."

"Johana you're my angel…seriously, what did I ever do to deserve you?"

"None of your sweet talk, now get!"

Hiding her smile, Alice offered her a solute before stepping out around her and making her way to the center of the camp where she knew Cook would be. Siding up to the man she offered him a dazzling smile that did nothing to change the scowl on his face, though the edges had softened. "Al."

"Cook," She acknowledged as she took the coffee and plate that he had on the side. "I hope you didn't save that all for me…"

"You eat like a bird." He grumbled in return before nodding to the plate, "Besides you look like a rail. Eat the damn food 'fore I decide to toss it out."

Grinning, Alice popped a potato in her mouth, "You wouldn't dare."

They both knew that was true and she offered him a pleasant smile as she nudged a crate over in order to sit next to him. The beginning of her shift normally started as such with the two of them enjoying the other's company. Cook was a gruff man and didn't like many people, but had taking a shining to her when he learned she had some farming experience and knew how and where to look for plants that either aided his job or substituted when he didn't have enough of a certain ingredient. Alice liked the man because he didn't try to flirt with her and he didn't mind not talking. The woman didn't fill silences with idle chit chat and the man allowed her to stay because of it, though he had first threatened her that if she began gabbing at all then he would tell her to beat it. She had dryly replied that she respected his honesty which had made him laugh and the two had been friendly ever since. After a few moment of silence, in which Alice had finished her food and coffee she stood and brushed herself off before taking care of her dishes and offering the man a wave as she trotted off to the med tent.

Once there she began checking inventory after Johana had waved her away. Frowning she went through the list and the further down she went the deeper her frown became. It was a miracle they were even still able to treat men for anything considering their less than acceptable supply and she knew she would have to go scrounging about in the morning for any of the nearby plants that would be helpful in an effort to sustain them for a little while longer. As much as Harrell complained, he knew that what Alice did saved them an awful large headache and it had made her rather popular with a few of the men so much to the point she had been dubbed a moniker. Rolling her eyes at the thought, Alice continued down her list and checking off items they did have and writing their quantity before checking the day shift's numbers and nodding when everything seemed to add up to what they had. Afterwards she sat at the desk and took out her own notebook with a series of plants and their uses before writing out a short list of what she would need to search for the following morning.

Frowning she considered trying to find a plant that had similar properties to iodine as they were startlingly low and set about that work. Johana and her had a system where she would begin rounds and set the current patients up for the evening before taking a cart with the empty trays and walking them back to Cook and then they would switch off so they could alternate the paperwork and labor easily and come morning, Alice would do rounds and update charts before going and grabbing the patients their breakfast. It was a system the two ladies had agreed upon learning they would be sharing a shift and it kept the work even and balanced which suited them just fine. Halfway through her reading she heard a knock on the side of the tent's beam and looked up and immediately had to bite back her groan.

"Sergeant Barnes…is there something I can do for you?"

The man in question sent her a dazzling smile that was missed on her completely as she merely returned to her book in an effort to magically produce the results she so desperately wanted. She ignored as he stepped into the tent and cleared his throat before speaking, his voice conveying his youth and a Brooklyn accent to boot.

"I heard a small rumor I was hoping you could squash for me."

Rolling her eyes she returned her gaze to him, "If you're looking for gossip you could try mess…I'm sure you'll be able to find more than enough there."

"Yeah, but I figured I'd come to the source." Was his laughing reply and Alice immediately wished she had fought Johana for rounds that evening. When she didn't answer he continued, "The rumor I heard is that they're callin' you the new Witch Doctor here at the 107th. That true?"

"I dunno, why don't you ask your men? They're the ones that came up with it." She answered drolly as she flipped another page. At this point she knew he wouldn't take no for an answer and unless a body came into the tent in that moment she wouldn't be escaping the conversation. Looking up at him she quirked a thick, yet trimmed brow at him, "If you're asking if I'm able to keep this place afloat on a small hobby and a few tricks from my mother, then yes the rumors are true."

"Does it bother you?"

The question took her off guard and she reexamined the man standing before her with intensity that she was sure, had he been any other man, would have made him squirm at her scrutiny. But no, James Barnes stood before her a tall and proud six feet if she remembered his file correctly, with slightly hunched shoulders as if trying to make himself appear smaller to her seated form – less threatening. And while Alice knew that realistically that her mutation would inevitably save her from any damage a man his size could inflict she was oddly touched that he seemed slightly concerned over whether or not she perceived him as a threat. But as her eyes glanced over his face she saw a steeliness enter his expression as if offended on her behalf if the moniker bothered her, the joking nature he had previously disappearing as he waited for her to answer in an effort to gauge her thoughts, his gun-metal blue eyes tightening around the edges.

Alice was also not new to the world of men during her lifetime and had learned quickly and at an early age not to get too attached since she would inevitably outlive any man she would ever be with. Being alone kept her secret safe and while she had always dreamed of what her parents had as a child, as an adult who had not properly aged since 1765 she knew love was not something she would ever be able to maintain. Perhaps, she had thought upon the new era, she could take advantage of the looser restrictions to courtship and love than when she was growing up and use the war as an excuse to love and leave, but knew in her heart she couldn't be that person…not ever again.

Shaking her thoughts back to the recesses of her mind she appraised the man before her and offered him a small, selfish smile. "If I were offended, Sergeant Barnes, I can guarantee that the men who started calling me that would have dropped it quickly enough without anyone being my knight in shining armor."

Bucky's brows rose in his surprise, the motion making the serious expression he had worn disappear altogether and it was in that instance, Alice decided, she liked his face best when he wasn't so serious. "Is that so?" He chuckled as he relaxed his stance further, ignoring the fluttering to the side of where he and Alice were speaking, knowing that beyond that small piece of fabric was Johana and she was undoubtedly listening to the conversation, "Not that I doubt you, of course, but if you don't mind my asking, but what would a dame like yourself do?"

He nearly squirmed when her hazel eyes met his and he suddenly wished he hadn't asked the question as she seemed to take slight offense to the statement before clearing her throat and sitting up, her shoulders back and making herself look much larger than her small frame appeared despite both the height difference as well as the fact that she was seated.

" _Not that I doubt you_ ," she parroted with a disbelieving snort, "You know, I hate it when men say that because inevitably what they actually mean is the exact opposite…it's kinda like saying _with all due respect_. The anticipated statement following either is always insulting. The answer, Sergeant Barnes, is milk thistle."

Bucky blinked, "I'm sorry?"

"Milk thistle," She repeated with a dark smirk twitching at her pretty features and he was suddenly sorry he'd asked. "It's helpful for things like constipation within the G.I. tract as it acts as a laxative. Surely a tea made with such a plant would help move things along quite suddenly for those who aren't anticipating the effects." Standing she eyed him, her posture straight and challenging, "You see _Sergeant_ , while I know my way around a gun or two, I certainly don't need to administer any type of violence when I can just as easily use my knowledge as a weapon just as fast as I can heal with it. Does that about answer your question or do you perhaps still doubt what I can or cannot do?"

"Not at all ma'am," He collected himself after his slight stutter before glancing as Johana entered the small area and shot him a look before turning her gaze to the brunette that stood silently stewing before him like the sky before an awful storm.

"Allie, I need some help with Private Harris' bandage, you always wrap better than I do."

Alice closed her book with a _snap_ and pushed it to the side with her inventory as well as her list before turning and giving him a once over, "A good night to you Sergeant."

"Um…you as well Second Lieutenant ma'am."

Johana tsk'ed at him with a pitying look before following after her enraged shift-mate, "Now Allie girl did you have to be so rough on him?"

"I hate it when men think flirting means that they get to doubt us and think we're just cute little arm candy until they get us on our backs," She snorted as she shuffled through the row of patients and sat herself on a trunk in the corner of supplies knowing the southern belle had merely claimed a patient needed her whether to give her an escape or to give Barnes an out Alice didn't know. Johana bit her lip and Alice frowned, "What?"

The woman giggled then and the mutant nearly lost the lid of her temper before the blonde woman shushed her, "I think you secretly like him and you're just giving him a hard time." When Alice went to protest the Georgian held up her hand, "Do you have a fella waiting at home for you?"

"No."

Johana stared at her for a moment, considering her before sighing, "Well what wrong will it do you to let loose and have some fun _Second Lieutenant ma'am_?"

"Shut up, Jo." Alice tried to remain serious but scoffed on a laugh before sighing, "Look I _don't_ have anyone waiting for me when I get home… _anyone_. I'm not ready for that kinda thing and I'm not used to having friends let alone someone pining after me like I'm a piece of jerky."

Johana's face melted into one of sadness at her admission before she snorted at the younger woman and slapping her shoulder, "Well deal girl because you got plenty 'o friends if you open those pretty brown peepers of yours." She then sent her a sly look, "And who's to say you gotta open yourself up sweetness? We're all in Hell; Lord almighty knows it and we should enjoy what little pieces of Heaven we get around here and that handsome Sergeant is certainly a _healthy_ slice of Heaven."

"Alright…Alright _fine_ , I'll give him another chance, but I swear on my parents' graves that if that boy undermines me again it's milk thistle in his soup!" Alice swore as the other nurse laughed before clapping her shoulder and nudging her back to the small booth so they could begin updating patient charts. After a few moments of silence Johana smiled over at the brunette nurse and with absolute clarity she spoke with firmness that had Alice questioning herself from then on.

"You're always gonna have friends Allie…always, ya just gotta know when to open up that little beater o' yours and when ya gotta tighten that belt because it'll always take ya on a wild ride."

**-0-**

Alice awoke with a start that made both Tony and Bruce glance in her direction from where they were working and she groaned when she noticed that it was just before dawn.

"Hey there Puss in Boots, what's scratching?"

She turned her eyes to Tony and rolled her eyes in light humor, silently thanking him for helping her bury her memories for another time. He had come up with the new nickname when she had retired to the lab after not being able to sleep in her bed and noted she was acting _cat-like_. Ever since he had been calling her Puss in Boots and she made a note to herself to make a list of more names for him. "Not too much, just had a strange dream is all."

Bruce looked up at her with a quirked brow and after sharing a look with Tony, the doctor returned his eyes to hers and taking note of the confusion hidden within her eyes. "Are you feeling alright, Al?"

"Yeah, sorry, just spacey and the need for coffee is literally strangling whatever coherent thought I could come up with…What I wouldn't give for an oat milk latte." She ignored the silent exchange between Bruce and Tony once more, as well as the latter's shrug, before turning and looking over the scepter. "Any luck on dissecting how the scepter works other than it's connected to the Tesseract?"

"Not yet," Tony answered before hitting a few buttons on his touch screen and frowning slightly. "Banner's got the scanners working on locating the cube and we're in the middle of hacking into S.H.I.E.L.D's mainframe to figure out why they want the cube in the first place." Alice nodded.

"That makes sense…Anything I can do to help?"

"Not unless you can break theses encryptions any faster."

She frowned before crossing her arms over her chest, "No…unfortunately not."

"Why not? You certainly sounded confident yesterday."

Alice ignored him, her eyes tracing the scepter before frowning softly. It was not often that she felt the need to give in to her natural curiosity, but at that moment as she gazed upon the otherworldly object she could not deny that a sudden thoughtfulness had fallen over her. Shaking the urge to reach her hand out and grasp the golden metal, she instead turned her eyes upon the window that was located behind the work bench and allowed her scowl to tug further upon the tired lines of her face. She realized suddenly that her body had not had enough time to recuperate since her detainment and especially with the little sleep she had gotten in the last two days, this day beginning to hedge on her third day within S.H.I.E.L.D's custody. The mutant winced as the wound at her side throbbed angrily as if reminding her of her failed attempts at healing, though she was happy to find that her other wounds had healed and she tested the flexibility of her scarred knuckles and grunted in satisfaction as the skin easily stretched over her clenched fist.

"You okay over there?"

She turned her eyes to meet the brown of Bruce's and nodded her head slowly, "Yeah, just making sure my other wounds are taken care of…my side is giving me more problems than I'm used to."

The doctor nodded, but not without eyeing her warily. Alice ignored this and instead kept her eyes trained on the slowly rising sun. Tony and Bruce had been working throughout most of the night in an effort to locate the Tesseract and Alice wondered if it was even remotely possible with the use of modern technology. In theory, and what she had managed to gather from Thor the night prior, the Tesseract was a purely magically-based object and what the Asgardian had informed her was known as an Infinity Stone – so could the Tesseract not defend itself with its own magic?

With this thought in mind, the mutant tucked herself into a corner of the lab and blocked out everything the billionaire and scientist were talking about (a series of algorithms, calculations and other such science talk that went right over the woman's head) and closed her eyes slowly. She was a creature of simple habits and she found meditation on her thoughts helped her sort out a problem and come to a conclusion or solution to that problem. As she sat, desperately attempting to block out Tony and Bruce's dialogue, everything she attempted failed. With a furrowed brow, Alice sighed deeply and looked up at the scepter that sat delicately on a stand in the center of the table that Bruce was working off of.

"The gamma readings are definitely consistent with Selvig's reports on the Tesseract. But it's gonna take weeks to process."

Tony began hitting his screen in rapid succession and he nodded to show he had heard the man, "If we bypass their mainframe and direct a reroute to the Homer cluster, we can clock this around six hundred teraflops."

"And I only packed a toothbrush."

Alice rolled her eyes at the doctor's humor and pushed herself from the corner she had tucked herself into only moments prior before circling the table and leaning against it as far away from the scepter as she could manage, simply watching the two men. Tony only smiled in response before casually moving his screen away from him and circling the device entirely, "You know, you should come by STARK TOWERS sometime. Top ten floors, all R&D. You'd love it, it's candy land."

Banner slowly stood from where he was examining the glowing blue orb centered within the scepter's blade before smiling almost sheepishly at the billionaire, "Thanks, but the last time I was in New York I kind of _broke_...Harlem."

Alice watched with a quirked brow in amusement as the genius shrugged carelessly before grabbing a hand-held electro-probe off of another work bench and swinging it casually as he circled the table Banner was working off of.

"Well, I promise a stress-free environment. No tension. No surprises…" Alice guffawed loudly as Tony hit Banner with the electro-probe causing the man to jump in surprise.

"OW!"

"HEY!"

Alice, ignoring the intensely clinical look that Tony was giving Banner, turned towards the new voice to see Steve storming forward into the lab with furrowed brows and still clad in his Captain America outfit, "Oh Steve, didn't hear you come in!" The man only rolled his eyes in response, but this went unnoticed by Tony as he kept his stare on Banner.

"Nothing?"

"Are you nuts?!"

"Jury's out," Tony shrugged simply earning another laugh from the brunette and an amused look from the doctor. Steve, however, was completely unamused.

"You really have got a lid on it, haven't you? What's your secret?" The billionaire continued as if Steve had not just shown up unannounced in the lab, "Mellow jazz? Bongo drums? Huge bag of weed?"

"Given the good doctor's situation, Tony, I doubt a huge bag of weed would help."

Steve only frowned, steamrolling over Alice's quip and ignoring the pleasant smile that appeared on Tony's face and the laugh that escaped Banner, "Is everything a joke to you?"

"Funny things are."

"Threatening the safety of everyone on this ship isn't funny. No offense, doctor."

Alice met Tony's eyes, "Maybe Banner isn't the one who needs a huge bag of weed." Steve rounded on the woman with blue eyes alight with an intense fire and was about to retort to her quip when Banner shook his head with a laugh.

"No, it's alright. I wouldn't have come aboard if I couldn't handle pointy things," He shot a pointed look to the billionaire who shrugged in response.

"You're tip-toeing big man, you need to strut."

The mutant smothered another laugh, "I doubt we need any more people preening like a peacock around here…" Tony shot her an indignant look as the doctor and mutant shared a humored look, even Steve appeared to relax as her teasing was not only directed at him, though his face remained as expressive as a rock as he glared at the dark haired man. Tony ignored the look as he circled around the table.

"And you need to focus on the problem, Mr. Stark."

"You think I'm not? Why did Fury call us and why now? Why not before? What isn't he telling us? I can't do the equation unless I have all the variables."

"You think Fury's hiding something."

"He's a _spy_. Captain, he's _the_ spy _. His secrets have secrets_." Alice, still leaned against the table, bounced her focus back and forth between the two men as if watching a verbal tennis match and she shook her head, meeting Banner's eyes and noticing that he had been doing the same while nodding along to Tony's dialogue from where he was leaned over the scepter with his scanning equipment. "It's bugging them too, isn't it?"

The two looked at one another once more before Banner stumbled over an explanation of his own theories, "Uh...I just wanna finish my work here and..."

All ignored when Tony pulled out a bag of organic blueberries from one of the undersides of the table.

"Doctor?"

He sighed, removing his spectacles, " _A warm light for all mankind_ , Loki's jab at Fury about the cube…"

"I heard it," Steve nodded before looking between him and Alice, who he found was strangely quiet. Banner turned his eyes to the billionaire with a slight frown.

"Well, I think that was meant for you," He stated simply as he pointed to Tony. After a beat, the billionaire offered Banner some of his blueberries, his head turned away slightly as he thought over what Banner was inferring. "Even if Barton didn't tell Loki about the tower, it was still all over the news."

"The Stark Tower? You mean that big, ugly…" He trailed off when Tony gave him an icy look, "building in New York?"

"It's powered by an arc reactor: a self-sustaining energy source. That building will run itself for, what, a year?"

Tony shrugged, "And that's just the prototype." He then turned to Steve in an effort to clarify, his hand reaching out to Alice in offering of blueberries, which she happily took a handful of. "I'm kind of the only name in clean energy right now. That's what he's getting at."

"So," Banner drew Steve's focus back to him, "why didn't S.H.I.E.L.D. bring him in on the Tesseract Project? What're they doing in the energy business in the first place?"

Steve turned his eyes to Alice who had hummed in agreement, "And you knew this?"

"I suspected it," She clarified before chewing thoughtfully on her blueberries, her eyes unfocused as she swallowed. "I never trusted S.H.I.E.L.D in the first place, so when the organization, that's meant primarily for defense and intelligence dabbles into territories that it has no means to be in, it sets off a few warning bells."

Steve looked contemplative for a moment as if truly considering her words before his eyes were drawn back to Tony as he perked up suddenly, "I should probably look into that once my decryption program finishes breaking into all of S.H.I.E.L.D's secure files."

"I'm sorry did you say…?"

"Jarvis has been running it since I hit the bridge." Tony answered without looking up at him, "Only one to notice was Puss in Boots here…" She waved dryly from the corner of the table as the Captain's eyes turned to her before Tony once again caught the man's eyes, "In a few hours I'll know every dirty secret S.H.I.E.L.D has ever tried to hide. Blueberry?"

The man ignored the offer and frowned, "Yet you're confused about why they didn't want you around."

"An intelligence organization that fears intelligence?" Tony prompted before spitting a dry, "Historically, not awesome."

Steve rolled his eyes, "I think Loki's trying to wind us up. This is a man who means to start a war and if we don't stay focused, he'll succeed. We have orders. We should follow them."

Alice frowned, standing straight and drawing all three men's eyes to her as she stared directly at the Captain, "So you mean to tell me that this doesn't seem odd to you at all? You forget Rogers we're not soldiers, you and I least of all anymore…the only soldiers are those employed by S.H.I.E.L.D." He appeared as if he was about to retort, but was once more interrupted by Tony. Alice's brows pinched together in a furrow – it appeared as if both Tony and Bruce were attempting to stop any arguments between her and Steve whenever possible and it confused her as the billionaire clearly had no qualms about engaging the 1940s poster-child in verbal volleyball.

"Following's not really my style," He stated as he popped a few blueberries into his mouth, his look daring the Patriot to comment further. Steve did not fail to do so.

"And you're all about style, aren't you?"

"Of the people in this room, which one is: A, wearing a spangly outfit, and, B, not of use?"

"Steve," Banner spoke up and drawing the man's eyes to him, "tell me none of this smells a little funky to you…"

It took a moment as he glanced between the three before frowning deeply, "Just find the Cube." Alice, not liking his tone, immediately followed him out of the lab and ignoring as Bruce attempted to subtlety call her back. Steve paused a moment outside of the lab before turning the opposite way he had been facing, his jaw set in a determined line. The mutant quickly caught up with him and frowned.

"Where are you going?"

Steve did not turn to look at her as he walked, his boots drowning out the light patter of her own steps. "Why're you following me?"

The almost cat-like look on her face brought a hidden smirk to the patriot's lips, though it was short lived as she opened her mouth to speak, "Because – I think I can say that you're as suspicious as the rest of us, but you're not willing to admit it." He did not reply right away, but his expression told Alice everything she needed to know about what he was truly thinking. "Why don't you just admit it, Steve…that you actually believe what Stark, Banner and I said back there…?"

"I don't like listening to the conclusions of others before I make my own; you of all people should know that."

She nodded along, putting her frustration with him aside for a time in order to maintain their civilized conversation thus far. It was not often of recent that she agreed with anything that Steve said, but she could not help but concur that drawing one's own conclusion was paramount to blindly following the suggestions of others. A small flicker of respect centered in her chest and she followed Steve quietly.

The two wandered through halls, Steve clearly have been given a proper tour which did little to quell the annoyance that Alice had with S.H.I.E.L.D. Though as the two continued to make way to the deeper parts of the helicarrier, it became more and more clear to the mutant that Steve was merely following two agents. After a while, both Steve and Alice ducked into an alcove as the two men continued down the hallway – it had taken the two a while to get to where they were as they had to sneak through the security doors after the agents put in their serial numbers and before the doors slid closed. After they were sure that the agents were not going to be coming back, the two stepped out of their hiding spot and moved to the door that was embedded within the wall.

"You can hack the door?"

Alice shrugged, "I shouldn't have too much of a problem, but I make no guarantees. I hack as a hobby and because I get bored easily, not because it's an occupation." Steve rolled his eyes as she leaned over the keypad in an effort to discern the code to open the door. "Keep watch for me, would you?"

"Right," He muttered before taking up a position behind her and keeping his eyes out for any other agents that would be making their way around corners and could possibly disrupt the two from their hunt.

"They should really wear gloves with these things…the oils from your hands always deposit on the first number and then it wears away…depending on how oily your hands are, and makes the rest of the code near untraceable."

Steve sighed, "Do you always talk to yourself?"

"Sometimes…maybe if you listened to my rambling you'd learn something."

"Yeah, no thanks."

Rolling her eyes, Alice went back to what she was doing and frowned as she followed the oily pattern only to frown as the door beeped, but did not open. "That doesn't make sense…"

"What doesn't?"

"The code should have been 456891 going by the finger pattern, but it's denying access."

After a few moments of thought, Steve gently pushed her aside and took a look at the door. With arched brows, the mutant watched as he braced himself against the door before prying it open with his bare hands, the metal groaning against the strain of being open. With another grunt, Steve managed to open the door wide enough for both himself and Alice to fit through. "Ladies first."

"Remind me to come to you if I can't get the pickle jar open."

"What?"

"Never mind, Steve…super strength though…nice touch - kinda forgot about it, honestly."

"Um," He hummed awkwardly, "thanks?"

Alice waved him off before sliding under his arm and moving out of the way to allow him to squeeze through the door, the mechanism making it snap shut as soon as Steve had cleared it. As Steve made to speak once more, Alice held up a hand to stop him as her senses were a bit more in tune at the moment.

"What is it?"

Frowning, her eyes flickered to him before she turned her head in an effort to strain her hearing a bit more, "We're not alone in here. I suggest we avoid as many confrontations as possible or clear them out otherwise it's gonna make looking for proof all the harder."

Steve looked down at her, his eyebrows raised, "You can hear all that?"

"Not my first rodeo…Remember Austria?"

With a humored look shared between the two, they stepped forward and down the hallway for a bit before Steve looked above him and motioned for the catwalk. Alice nodded her head and took lookout as Steve began climbing his way up to the catwalk before turning down to her and offering her his hand. Grasping it tightly she allowed herself to be pulled up, using her feet to get a grip to aide in her ascent, though she doubted that Steve needed her help as she probably weighed next to nothing for him.

"Just like old times."

The patriot nodded, chuckling quietly as the situation was eerily similar to when they had broken into the Hydra base in Austria for the 107th. She had yet to put her hair back into its usual braid and so the curled tresses fell loosely around her shoulders and into her face as she stood, raking a hand through the strands to remove them from her face.

"C'mon," She shrugged as she pulled her hair over her shoulder in an attempt to tame it, suddenly cursing the fact she had rushed out of her room the evening before without a hair tie, "We need to get in and out of here…"

Steve shot her a tense smile, "I don't think I can agree more."

The two lapsed into silence as they continued along the catwalk and after ten minutes of watching the patriot squirming out of the corner of her eye she sighed deeply, "What's on your mind, Steve?"

"I, uh…wanted to say thanks…for Germany."

"Oh…you're welcome." She shifted uncomfortably, "To be honest with you, if Loki's blast had hit you, you definitely wouldn't be standing here talking to me."

They fell back into an awkward silence, soon coming upon a series of crates that were sealed shut. Steve and Alice paused before the crates, their earlier discomfort forgotten with their discovery. Steve did not need any encouragement to pry open the crates and look inside and as the lid opened he stopped, staring in something akin to horror on his face as he recognized the equipment inside.

"You've got to be kidding…"

"Why would they need HYDRA weapons?" Steve asked more to himself than the woman next to him. Alice turned hard eyes to him and frowned deeply.

"I don't know, but we know that HYDRA's weapons were powered by the Tesseract…right?" When Steve nodded she turned her eyes to the weapons housed inside of the crate. "If S.H.I.E.L.D had the weapons HYDRA created…and they were researching the Tesseract when Loki appeared then…"

Finally catching on to what the former nurse was saying, Steve turned his eyes to her and scowled deeply as his face contorted in anger, "Then that means that S.H.I.E.L.D is planning on making weapons with the Tesseract."


	6. My Demons

_As the Sky May Fall  
_ _The Avengers  
06_

* * *

**** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS THEMES OF VIOLENCE AND DEPICTIONS OF DEATH. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ****

* * *

Steve was fuming as he thundered down the catwalks, no longer caring whether or not any S.H.I.E.L.D agents heard him. Alice winced slightly at the force of his steps, jogging to keep up with his long strides. She was not foolish enough to say that Steve's anger was not justified, as she felt rather similarly, but as much as he annoyed the ever living daylights out of her and his attitude truly grated on her nerves, she did not want to see him act rashly. She was well aware that he had to have given everything in order to take that nose dive into the ocean to rid the world of the Tesseract and to have fought against it while being in the wrong hands the first time was worse than déjà vu – it was that the Tesseract was threatening the world once more. Rather, it was an organization that was _using_ the Tesseract that was endangering the world once more and that made the situation even worse in her eyes. After catching up to him once more, she huffed slightly and briefly drawing his irate gaze.

"Steve, I'm not saying that you're over reacting, because you're _not_ , but can we at least _try_ and be a little more quiet? We're still in a restricted area."

"Since when have you cared about the rules?"

She snorted, "I take serious offense to that accusation! I've done nothing _but_ follow the rules since we've gotten here…well minus the whole sneaking into restricted areas of the helicarrier in order to satisfy our curiosity and hacking the organization's mainframe before they sent agents out to detain me…" At Steve's incredulous and exasperated look she sighed slightly, "I digress, but just because I don't follow orders, Rogers, doesn't mean that I don't respect that rules are in place for a reason."

The patriot only rolled his eyes before he stormed around another corner, almost shoving an agent that attempted to stop them out of their way as the blonde had not put the Phase 2 weapons back into their respective crates upon discovery. Alice only puffed in aggravation before breaking into a jog to keep up with the taller man's strides as they moved down another hallway that would lead them to the lab where Bruce and Tony were still searching for the Tesseract.

" _And you'll get your cube back, no muss, no fuss_ ," She heard Tony saying as they rounded down the hallway that led directly to the lab and she frowned deeply, hearing a series of beeps come from the monitor she knew he had been next to. " _What is Phase 2_?"

At that moment she and Steve walked into the lab, the patriot tossing the HYDRA assault rifle onto the lab table in front of Tony and Bruce and next to Fury, drawing all three men's eyes, "Phase 2 is S.H.I.E.L.D uses the cube to make _weapons_." He nearly growled before shooting an annoyed look to the dark haired billionaire, "Sorry, computer was moving a little slow for me."

"Care to give us an explanation, Director?" She questioned, her alto toned on sarcasm as she glared at the director.

"Rogers, Alexander, we gathered everything related to the Tesseract. This does not mean that we're..."

"I'm sorry Nick," Tony called icily as he turned the monitor he had been looking at as the weapon schematics appeared on screen, " _what_ were you lying?"

Steve only glared at Fury as the evidence became clear, "I was wrong, Director, the world hasn't changed a bit."

"So I think you either give Rogers his ten bucks back or, you begin explaining exactly _what in the seven circles of Hell_ is going on here, Fury." Alice's hands clenched around her biceps where she had crossed her arms as she and Steve had entered the room, and ignoring when Thor and Natasha entered the lab behind her as her eyes narrowed and shifted from their usual hazel to a molten cinnamon. "I did not get plucked from my normal life to consult, _against my will_ , on an object that is not only out of your realm of understanding, impossible to control and not meant for us to use…and especially not for you to build _weapons_ out of it!"

Bruce grunted his agreement before turning his glare to the scarlet haired assassin, "Did you know about this?"

"You want to think about removing yourself from this environment, Doctor?" She replied curtly as the two locked eyes. Alice briefly acknowledged the anger in Banner's voice, but otherwise did nothing to calm his annoyance. As far as she saw it, she and the Doctor were both forced to join S.H.I.E.L.D's endeavor without much of a choice in the matter and Natasha was at the focal point of both of their detainment.

Bruce only chuckled darkly, sarcasm oozing along the thinly veiled annoyance in his tone, "I was in _Calcutta_ ; I was pretty well _removed_." Natasha only frowned slightly.

"Loki is manipulating you," She commented before turning her eyes to the mutant who already had her eyes fixed on the assassin, "And I can't help but believe that you're a part of that as well."

Alice only snorted in disbelief at the woman and had been about to retort, but Banner drew her attention away from her anger towards Natasha's accusation as he rounded the table where the scepter lay, "And you've been doing _what_ exactly?"

"You didn't come here because I bat my eyelashes at you."

"And I'm not leaving because suddenly you get a little twitchy," He commented venomously at the woman before grabbing the monitor and motioning to it, his dark eyes now fixed on the director. "Now, I'd like to know why S.H.I.E.L.D is using the Tesseract to build weapons of mass destruction."

There was a tense silence between the gathered heroes before Fury sighed and pointed directly at Thor, "Because of them."

For the first time in the entire conversation, Thor spoke, his voice toned with incredulity, "Me?"

Fury turned his eye to look at the god, "Last year Earth had a visitor from another planet who had a grudge match that leveled a small town. We learned that not only are we not alone, but we are hopelessly, _hilariously_ , outgunned."

Throughout the Director's explanation the mutant could not help but stare openly at him in abhorring and what was worse was he continued without pause in his accusation, clearly not realizing just how dangerous the waters he was treading really were. Thor's brows furrowed in his own exasperation to the Director's, frankly ridiculous, monologue, "My people want nothing but peace with your planet!"

"But you're not the only people out there, are you? And, you're not the only threat. The world's filling up with people who can't be matched, that can't be controlled."

"You mean _mutants_?" Alice questioned incredulously, her hands clenching into fists around the fabric of her sweatshirt and when Fury merely stared at her she knew she had her answer and she snorted in derision, her eyes narrowed into a glare that promised danger. "Most of us are peaceful at best and we have been policing each other longer than you've been thinking for yourself and if that's the way you _truly_ feel why call _me_ a _mutant_ in to do your grunt work!? You're no better than any other warmongering opportunist!"

"Yes, _mutants_ ," Fury snarled, "have been known to _historically_ level towns and cities and us _normal_ civilians have nothing to combat against the power you wield."

"We don't get to _choose_! It's not like the lottery where we get all excited when we win the gene-pool, you moron. Most of us hide away our entire lives to avoid witch-hunts that people like _you_ incite!" Her eyes narrowed, "Or did I misunderstand when I was taken _against my will_ for being what I am and locked away in a lab!?"

"We were planning on dealing with _threats_ , Alexander, and we need something to help us in that endeavor whether you like it or not!"

She barely noticed the silence that had fallen in the lab as she snarled at him, her muscles coiled to launch at the director despite his hand reaching for his firearm - knowing that it wound't actually do anything to stop her if he did fire - and she grunted slightly as Steve held her back, his arm blocking her path to the man before her. It appeared as if he wasn't going to allow her to act rashly either and prove the director's point and he scoffed, "You mean like you controlled the cube?"

"Your work with the Tesseract is what drew Loki to it, and his allies." The Thunderer snapped with impatience and anger at the accusation being thrown upon him, his eyes flickering between the mutant and director for a moment before his stare settled on the one-eyed director, "It is a signal to all the realms that Earth is ready for a higher form of war!"

"A higher form?"

Alice turned eyes to Steve and frowned, "Unfortunately what Fury overlooked when he started _playing judge, jury_ and _executioner_ was that when you begin to tamper with things that you do not understand it backfires, _every single time_!" She ignored the glare sent to her by Natasha and turned hard eyes to the director, "The Red Skull killed hundreds of thousands of people with this kind of technology and you decided to follow his example? That _this_ is what we needed? And because you're scared and intimidated your solution was to make weapons?! You may have been placed here to be some kind off protector, but stop pretending to have our best interests at heart!"

Fury glared at her, "You _forced_ our hand. We had to come up with something –!"

"A nuclear deterrent," Tony cut in forcefully with a glare of his own, "because that calms everything right down."

"Remind me again how you made your fortune, Stark?"

"I'm sure if he still made weapons, Stark would be neck-deep –"

"Wait, wait! Hold on! How is this now about me!?"

"Oh, I'm sorry isn't everything?"

"Steve shut up you're lowering the IQ of the entire room."

The Patriot turned on the mutant with eyes of ice, "What did you just say to me?"

"I think you heard me perfectly clear."

Thor only shook his head, "I thought humans were more evolved than this."

"Excuse me," Fury drawled loudly, "But did we come to _your_ plant and blow stuff up?!"

"Do you always give your champions such mistrust?"

Natasha finally joined the argument as well, clearly reaching the saturation level of her patience, "Are you all really _that_ naïve?! S.H.I.E.L.D monitors potential threats!"

"Captain America is on threat watch?" Banner commented dryly as he turned to her once more. Natasha rolled her eyes in response.

"We all are!"

"You're on that list?" Tony turned to the patriot his features colored in disbelief, "Are you above or below angry bees?"

"I swear to God, Stark, one more crack –!"

" _Threatening_! He threatened me! I feel threatened!"

Alice would have laughed at the billionaire if the situation would have been different, but as the arguments began to escalate she began to feel uneasy. It seemed as if suddenly a strange energy had sat upon the occupants of the room and her skin tingled with the growing surge. The mutant ignored as Fury made another crude comment about her role within the group of heroes gathered, her attention completely set on finding the source of power that had begun to settle and pulse within the room. Her eyes scanned each person, finding nothing out of the ordinary before her eyes rested upon the scepter. To her astonishment and fascination, the gem centered within the blade of the golden artifact was beginning to glow and pulse and she immediately turned her eyes back to the arguments that were beginning to grow with each pulse of the gem. She was snapped from her thoughts as Thor's voice rose above the rest, his attention directed at Fury.

"You speak of control, yet you court chaos!"

"That's his M.O. isn't it?" Banner inquired with sarcasm as he eyed each person in the room, though his primary focus was upon the organization's Director, "I mean, what are we, a team? No, no, no. We're a chemical mixture that makes chaos. We're...we're a time-bomb."

"You need to step away."

The tone of Fury's voice did not miss Alice's notice as her eyes met Banner's form and where he stood. She understood the director's worry about the scepter, but she knew it was not the way to go about dismissing the Doctor and she opened her mouth to speak, but was stopped when Tony began to speak once more.

"Why shouldn't the guy let off a little steam?"

Steve, annoyed with Tony's behavior, knocked the billionaire's arm from around his shoulder, "You know damn well why, back off."

"Oh, I'm starting to want you to make me."

"Big man in a suit of armor. Take that off, what are you?"

Without missing a beat, Tony answered him dryly, "Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist."

Natasha shrugged slightly, though whether in admission to that status or not was lost upon Alice who refused to comment at this point in the argument. It was not lost to the mutant that her services were no longer required within S.H.I.E.L.D or with the group of assembled heroes and she did not want to be. All she wanted was to go back to her normal life, her quiet life of work, privacy and freedom. Now that she thought on it, Alice realized that she would never really be free from S.H.I.E.L.D's influence so long as she lived and suddenly Loki's words came back to her with a vengeance and she could picture the smug smile that he would have on his face when he realized that he had been acutely accurate with his summation. She would never be free and that fact within and of itself is what ate at her.

"I know guys with none of that worth ten of you. Yeah, I've seen the footage." Steve had continued the argument oblivious to the mutant's daunting realization. "The only thing you really fight for is yourself. You're not the guy to make the sacrifice play, to lay down on a wire and let the other guy crawl over you."

There was a storm brewing in Tony's eyes when he answered, "I think I would just _cut the wire_."

Steve smirked, condescension heavy in his features, "Always a way out... You know, you may not be a threat, but you better stop pretending to be a hero."

"A hero? Like _you_?" Tony snapped as the storm in his eyes seemed to come to a crescendo, "You're a lab rat, Rogers. Everything _special_ about you came out of a _bottle_!" Without words, Alice, despite the thoughts still raging in her mind and the hurt beating an uncomfortable rhythm against her breast, moved forward and stood at Steve's side with her hand to his shoulder and her back to Tony. She, above everyone else in the room, did not want this argument to turn into a physical altercation and so placed her smaller frame just out of range of the two men in preparation of one of them lunging at the other. She could feel the tense muscles of Steve's shoulder relax slightly under her hand as she shifted beside him to get a better hold between the two men. She shot the billionaire a glance over her shoulder in silent inquiry and Tony spared her barely a glance before he turned his eyes back to the patriot in clear expression that he had no intentions of backing down now, but that he would attempt to reign in his temper.

Steve, clearly not acknowledging the mutant's involvement and angered by the billionaire's words, scoffed. "Put on the suit, let's go a few rounds."

" _Steve_ ," She muttered in exasperation, "let it go."

This was the first time she had ever heard him egging someone to fight and it left a much different taste in her mouth than the stories of a small kid from Brooklyn standing up to bullies because he seemed to think that _Tony_ was a bully. If Alice had half a mind she would have reminded him that he was certainly _sounding_ like a bully especially since Tony didn't deserve such ire no matter how infuriating he was. She remembered Steve to be level headed and slow to anger, but she had to go off of what Bucky used to tell her about his friend. Steve was a hot headed Irish-Catholic kid from a part of New York that had been hit hard by the Great Depression and she recalled Bucky telling her stories about how Steve had a hard time backing away from a fight and he was usually the one who had to come in and clean everything up and that included pulling a very righteous Steven Rogers from whoever he was getting pummeled by. But this was not one of those instances and she was not Bucky no matter how much she would ever try, their last argument before he disappeared into the artic and before she had been reassigned came to mind and she immediately pushed the thought to the back of her mind.

The patriot turned his ice blue eyes to her, clearly still incensed, "Back off Alice."

"Let it _go_." She replied firmly, her brows pinching together to form an angry glower to her features, "This _isn't_ the time."

"You people are so _petty_ …" Thor's laugh brought attention away from Tony and Steve in favor of looking at him with looks ranging from indifferent to annoyed, "and _tiny_!"

"Yeah this is a team," Banner commented dryly from the side of the room and drawing attention back to him once more. Tony rubbed his head and nodded to Alice in clear statement that he was not going to be attacking the Captain as of yet.

"Agent Romanoff, would you escort Dr. Banner back to his –"

" _Where_?" Bruce challenged with a humorless laugh, "You _rented_ my room."

Fury tried to explain once more, "The cell was just in case –"

"In case you needed to kill me," Banner enunciated, his voice toned on aggravation and growing anger, "but you can't, I know, _I tried_!" The room fell silent to the Doctor's admission and he sighed, crossing his arms over his chest and shrugging indifferently, "I got low. I didn't see an end, so I put a bullet in my mouth and the other guy _spit it out_! So I moved on. I focused on helping other people. I was _good_ , until you dragged me back into this _freak show_ and put everyone here at risk!"

"Bruce…"

The Doctor ignored the mutant's warning as he turned cool brown eyes to Natasha who flinched under his intense gaze, "You wanna know my secret, Agent Romanoff? You wanna know how I stay calm?"

Everyone tensed as Bruce unconsciously grabbed the still pulsing scepter, Fury and Natasha unclipping the cover for their holsters as they reached for their guns. It was Steve, however, that caught the Doctor's attention, "Dr. Banner…put down the scepter."

A look of horror seemed to wash over the Doctor's face before a series of beeping sounds echoed throughout the lab and drawing everyone's attention to it. Banner, distracted from the fact that he had been holding the scepter rolled his eyes before unceremoniously placing the scepter back onto the table as he moved to the monitor and shooting a look at Natasha as he passed, "Sorry, kids…looks like you don't get to see my party trick after all."

"You've located the Tesseract?" Thor inquired, though the question went unanswered as Tony spoke up.

"I can get there faster."

"Look, all of us…"

Thor blatantly spoke over Steve this time, clearly annoyed with being ignored, "The Tesseract belongs on Asgard; no human is a match for it."

"You're not going alone!"

Tony glared at the Patriot, "You gonna stop me?"

"Put on the suit, let's find out."

"I'm not afraid to hit an old man."

"Put. On. The. Suit."

"For Christ's sake!" Alice bit in frustration as she stared at the two men, "Knock it off!"

Ignoring the argument, Bruce frowned intently at the screen before pulling off his glasses, "Oh my God…"

For a moment, Alice was not certain which way was up or down as an explosion had rocked the Helicarrier violently, throwing the heroes every which way. She vaguely heard Steve tell Tony to get his suit before both rushed out of the room and she groaned loudly as the blast had knocked her clear over one of the lab benches and into a supply cabinet. Looking down at herself in order to take inventory of her injuries, a small whimper passed her lips as she realized that she had landed into the closet filled with needles and other instruments, some of which had cut her during her fall or were sticking into her skin. Managing to push down some of her panic, she grabbed at one of the syringes and yanked them from her arm before tossing it into a sharps container that had landed next to her. Pulling herself off of the floor she stood, realization coming to her that the Helicarrier was under attack and that these people were probably friends of Loki's.

Darting from the lab as quickly as she could, not bothering to check on Fury who had already been barking orders into his communication device, she stumbled along the halls in an effort to dodge S.H.I.E.L.D agents who were rushing about in an attempt to get to their stations and fight off their intruders. Alice realized quickly that these intruders were possibly there for no other reason than to break Loki out and allow him to join them wherever they had taken the Tesseract. She wondered briefly what had happened to Natasha and Bruce as she had not seen them after the blast, but shook her head to refocus herself.

She needed to get down to the detention level.

Flying through the hallways as fast as her legs could manage; Alice jumped and ducked around any of those who were not directly in her way and the fallen debris from the hit that the Helicarrier had taken. As she swung herself down another hallway she was forced to duck as she came face to face with three intruders and the man in front swung his rifle at her. After ducking the first man's swing she immediately hit the second man in his throat before blocking a wild haymaker from the third man before striking his face and kicking his knee in an effort to dislocate the joint. The man cried out in pain as his leg hyper-extended and dislocated with a vicious _snap_ before Alice used her momentum to aim a mule kick at the first man, who had since recovered from his initial swing. _Memo to self: send a quick prayer thanking Bucky for the self-defense training later_ , she thought to herself as she continued to dodge.

Knocking the first man back she aimed another kick to the third man's head to render him unconscious before turning back to the second man, grabbing a bar that had fallen and smacking across his head as hard as she could. As the second man fell she refocused her energy on the first man and reached into her pocket and using her cell phone as a projectile and stunning him slightly before she grabbed his neck and swung him as hard as she could head-first into the wall before rendering him unconscious as well. With her momentary distraction taken care of, the mutant swung herself down the stairs that led to the lower levels of the flying HQ and where the detention level was centered.

Her momentary triumph was cut short as she jumped the last few stairs and was immediately grabbed by her sweatshirt mid-air and tossed wildly to the side of the wall, her skull meeting with the metal wall and issuing a nasty _crack_. Shaking her disorientation, the mutant looked up to see that her attacker was easily three times her size both in height and width and she could not help the fear that coursed through her veins at the mere size of the man.

He stood easily above six foot with dark hair that was slicked back into a ponytail that waved wildly as if a tangled man. He wore camouflage pants that he tucked into large combat boots (Alice took immediate notice that his foot size easily surpassed the length of her forearm and would be able to snap the aforementioned appendage easily if she were to give him that opportunity), and a matching tank that showed off the large and glistening muscles, that easily surpassed the size of her head, lined in tattoos. The mustache and goatee combo added a more intense look to his already intimidating features and seemed to highlight the nasty scarring on the left side of his face. Even in her disorientated state, Alice knew for a fact that she would not be leaving this fight unscathed. A weak chuckle passed her lips as her arms attempted to push the rest of her body into an upright position against the wall.

"You wouldn't happen to just, you know, not want to fight and keep walking like I never came down those stairs…would ya?"

The man only scoffed loudly, "Little lady not want to fight me?"

She winced, "No, no I do not. I'd actually rather like it if you turned out the light on your way out."

"You dishonor me!" He roared loudly and Alice winced at the volume of his voice and sighed, managing to slowly pick herself off of the floor and brush herself off. "You dare, ignore Ivan!?"

"Oh for the love of all that is good and holy in this world," She grumbled before gathering herself and throwing a stun bomb at the large man she had found on the ground. Normally the blast would be enough to render a man unconscious, but as the blast disappeared she paled as the man merely brushed it off. "You've _got_ to be kidding me…" The man looked up at her and smirked wickedly before stalking forward. Alice did not wait around and began to run. In her panic she cursed herself for trying to be clever.

"I'm coming to get you little lady!"

_SHIT_! She thought frantically as she ran, _How in the hell am I supposed to get rid of this guy!?_ Immediately she began thinking of the schematics of the floor as she had been down on this level more than the other levels of the carrier and she vaguely remembered that the garbage disposal unit was located somewhere on this floor as she had noticed it the first time she had gone to speak to Loki in his cell. With an idea in mind, Alice made for the hallway that would lead her to the chute.

"Found you."

She managed to duck as a large arm swung over her head and she spun her body to the left in an effort to keep him from grabbing her, her body bouncing off of the wall slightly and flaring with pain from the scepter's burn as she attempted to right herself and continue her vigorous sprint to the correct hallway. Upon reaching the hallway she turned to face the large man just in time to dodge another strike aimed for her head. However, she miscalculated and walked directly into another strike that hit her lower midsection, the air leaving her lungs and forcing her to back up to avoid another hit as she attempted to get the air she lost back the blow near crippling her from the pain already radiating from her side. In her panic she threw a loose piece of debris at him, feeling the strain of her quickly depleting energy she dodged once more, using the palm of her hand to knock away another punch before striking back with a quick jab to his nose.

The man cried out in pain and stumbled back from her as the appendage began to spurt blood like a fountain from his nostrils. She took his momentary surprise to catch some of her breath before hitting the button on the side of the wall that would open the window to the garbage dump. She did not expect him to recover as quickly as he did and a cry escaped her throat as he grabbed a fistful of her hair and yanked her backwards. In an attempt to free herself she kicked her feet out, allowing her body to curl in an effort to hit his head as her legs were much more powerful than her upper body and especially her arms. The man swung her suddenly into the wall and she found herself lost for breath once more and her reaction times much slower. She knew immediately that she was outmatched on terms of strength, but if she could knock him into the disposal she could literally drop him from the Helicarrier. She had him beat when it came to being clever; all she had to do was apply it.

She groped at the hands that had quickly found her neck in an effort to release herself and gasped as he lifted her from where she had been knocked off of her feet and pinned her to the wall. Grunting he leaned in closer to her and smirked, allowing his dark eyes to roam her face as she struggled to free herself from his hold.

"You are so tiny."

Alice, had the situation been much different, would have responded with a biting and sarcastic remark, but her main focus was to continue to find a way to get enough air to her lungs so she could think properly. In all her years, the mutant had never once been good at close combat, her fighting experience coming from what she had learned from brief recesses of time with Bucky and by watching old martial arts movies…even the wars she had fought in hadn't prepared her for this kind of a fight!

"Do you not hear me little lady?"

After a moment and coming up with a plan she only hoped would work she managed to choke out a response after nearly gagging on the stench of the man's breath, "It's just a shame, my nose works just fine."

The man snarled before slamming her into the metal wall once more, unfortunately a move that Alice had not been hoping for and she heaved a mental sigh before remembering a move she had seen in a movie and only prayed it worked. With great effort and a grunt of exertion, Alice swung her legs up and kicking the inside of his arm and forcing him to bend his elbow and with strength she didn't know she had she twisted his arm up in the air before bringing it down in an arm bar after managing to trap his hand underneath her own arm for leverage. It had been a last ditched effort in order to release herself and was a move that she had never actually done, so when the man's elbow dislocated with a nasty _pop_ , she could not help but cringe. The man immediately released her, screaming out in agony as he nursed the appendage and giving the fallen woman enough time to catch her breath. She then stumbled to her feet and moved just in time as the man swung wildly at her, both blinded by his pain and rage and she danced her way back to the now open chute.

She dodged backwards again, feeling the edge of the wall hit the back of her feet and she glanced behind her quickly to check her distance before turning back to look at the man. "I will CRUSH YOU!"

"Go ahead, I won't even move."

The man snarled and charged forward and after timing her movement appropriately she dropped to the ground and covered her head. The lack of a person startled the man, but he could not stop as his momentum was already carrying him forward too quickly and he went sailing through the open chute and into the Helicarrier's garbage disposal. Scrambling to her feet, Alice hit the button to close the chute before glancing inside to wave at him mockingly before hitting the button that would release the trash. As the trash fell and the doors closed once more, Alice took a moment to herself to catch her breath and mentally apologize for the amount of trash she had just littered.

"Thank you Star Wars."

Soon after her momentary breather, she pushed herself off of the wall and stumbled her way through the detention level. Shaking her ailments as her mutation already began to heal her aching limbs, she soon came upon the door leading to Loki's cell to already find it open and she immediately cursed before pushing herself into a run. As she entered the room she noticed that Thor, not the raven-haired god, was behind the thick glass and was glaring at a smug looking trickster, who stood next to the control panel that activated the glass prison.

Without thinking, or taking stock of the enemies in the room, Alice let loose a shot from the gun discarded on the catwalk in an effort to keep him from dropping Thor off of the Helicarrier. Immediately the god of Mischief looked up to meet her glaring eyes and a smirk immediately pulled at his lips, "Ah, if it isn't the mutant."

"This _mutant_ has a name asshole and I suggest you start using it." She snapped, more than over all of the fighting for one day and more than tired of Loki's insults. "Now back off or I will blast you into Kingdom Come."

"An odd phrase for you to use considering we both know that you believe little in the God that many of your kind seem to put so much stock into."

Her eyes narrowed dangerously, acknowledging that he was merely saying it to rile her up but itching more to blast the smug look off of his face. "Do you really think so highly of yourself?" She snorted in reply, "I've seen a lot scarier in this world than a would-be-god that needs to prove he's some big strong man." It was immediately clear to her that she had hit a nerve and a small voice in the back of her head told her she had come dangerously close to sinking within treacherous waters, if Loki's face was anything to go by. The deity did nothing but snort before multiple forms of himself appeared throughout the room, clearly dismissing the renegade allies he had managed to accumulate and stating that this was now personal.

_Well shit._

The thought almost came too late as the copies immediately moved forward in attacks and she quickly grabbed a riot shield that had been lying at her feet before using her dexterity to maneuver each clone and cut it down. As she cut through the last clone a blast hit her side and sent her careening into the wall and dangerously close to the edge of the catwalk. Glaring at the dark haired god she fired another few rounds back at him to give her enough time to get back to her feet.

Flares of green and bullets flew back and forth at a rate that was quickly diminishing whatever energy that the mutant had stored after her fight with the large mercenary. With each spell a _zap_ , _pop_ , or _whiz_ followed as well as a _sizzle_ when it would hit the metal surrounding them or a _crack_ when the hit landed on either of them. Though as the battle raged on, it was clear that Loki had the pure advantage as he had both more stamina and experience, where Alice was merely a mutant with the power to not die and therefore unable to truly do anything but heal. She suddenly found herself frustrated that when she found herself cursed with the X-gene that she couldn't at least get a mutation that would grant her any type of augmentation that would help her in this kind of situation and made another mental note to curse Logan out when she saw him next.

It was sudden, but as another blast hit her in the arm, a _snap_ occurred somewhere deep within the mutant that brought her to her knees and gasping for breath. She was unsure what had caused the immediate and blinding pain, but it left her dizzy and unable to block the quick, but powerful, physical attacks and she soon found herself barely conscious and clinging to the metal bars of the rail to prevent herself from falling over the edge. Despite her position, she did not relent in her glare of stubborn defiance as the god stood over her. It was at this moment, Loki snarled, grabbing the front of her shirt and lifting her so they were even in height and at that moment, Alice was thankful that Loki had not grabbed her by her already tender neck.

"You will remember this moment and document it within that immeasurably daft spirit you think you contain as the day you learned your place."

Alice smirked weakly at him, "The day I learn the place you wish for me to have will be the day I draw my last breath, dickhead." Pain blossomed immediately in her body as she was dropped and kicked back into the railing. Coughing and gasping for air, she watched between the curtain of her now tangled mane as the green and gold-clad god stalked back to the machine and began imputing the code that would unlock the bottom of the chamber. It was at this moment that the man standing over her, more than likely making sure she had no intentions of getting back up, crumbled into a heap next to her and she looked up to see Agent Phil Coulson standing there with a familiar Phase 2 prototype blaster.

"Move away, please."

Loki, seeing the weapon began to back away from the console, though Alice immediately noticed the calculated look that had overtaken the ice-blue of his eyes. Coulson seemed to notice this as well because he braced the weapon with his other hand, a stray eye on Alice and another on his target.

"You okay there Alice?"

The mutant almost laughed in utter relief but as her ribs screamed in protest she managed a small gasp before answering in the affirmative. "As good as I can be…"

"Good," He nodded, not once taking his eyes off of Loki, "You like this?" He asked as he gestured to the gun in his hands. "We started working on the prototype after you sent the _Destroyer_. Even I don't know what it does." The agent cocked the weapon and it began to charge with the new ammo locked inside of it, "Do you wanna find out?"

There was a tense silence and Alice's eyes widened as she noticed the change in the raven-haired god's features and she immediately made to stand and push Coulson out of the way only to arrive too late. Loki had appeared behind the agent and, with the scepter in hand, impaled him, the blade peeking out from the other side of the man's chest.

" ** _NOOOOOOOOO_**!" Thor thundered as he pounded upon the glass that imprisoned him, unable to do anything but watch as Loki merely tossed the agent aside, allowing him to slide down the wall. He glared at his brother as they locked eyes, but that was until Alice jumped at him, her eyes molten brown and glowing with danger and promise of bloodshed as she found herself bursting with adrenaline. She managed to swipe at him once with a knife she had snatched during her movement and catching him in the jaw, before Loki grabbed her and threw her into the wall next to the agent where she fell, unmoving. "Brother…you need not do this…"

"Oh," Loki smirked as he looked back at the blonde Thunderer, "But I must." Without once looking back, the god hit the button before watching as Thor disappeared from the chamber and the hatch closed behind him. Smirking to himself, Loki flipped the plastic covering down and nodded to the men in the room to move out. With a satisfied sigh he looked down at the fallen mutant and frowned slightly. It certainly was a shame to have lost a potential ally, however, he was better off without her self-righteous attitude getting in the way of his plans. His thoughts were disrupted when a weak cough rattled from the man he had stabbed, Agent Phil Coulson, as he recalled Alice and Thor calling him at times.

"You're gonna lose."

"Am I?"

"It's in your nature."

Loki frowned, changing his hold on the scepter as he looked at the agent. "Your heroes are scattered, your floating fortress falls from the sky...where is my disadvantage?" Coulson only managed a weak chuckle.

"You lack conviction."

"I don't think I..." He never got to finish his rebuttal as Coulson fired the shot, the blast sending Loki straight through the wall over Alice's form and out of sight completely.

After a moment of silence, and no sign if the god had been hurt or not, the agent allowed a smile to cross his lips, "So, that's what it does." In the moments that followed, Phil attempted many times to get himself to stand and with no avail. It was minutes after he had given up trying to stand that Alice stirred from her position a few feet away from him. He watched as she gazed around in disorientation before her eyes fell on him and they widened, sudden clarity surging forth and with it the changing of her eye color. "Hey, Alice."

Pushing herself to move despite feeling as if a house had collapsed on her, she quickly managed to get to his side. "Hang in there Coulson, you're not allowed to go anywhere yet."

Phil only chuckled, "That jumping on Loki's back was pretty cool."

The mutant gave him a chastising look, though it was weak as she offered him a muted smile, before pulling open the flap of his blazer and frowning at the amount of blood that the man had lost. With a deep breath she placed her hands over the wound and began putting pressure on it. Coulson grunted; the pain there resonating deeply within him, though he knew she was attempting her best to help him. "Just leave it…I'm not gonna last much longer any way."

"Knock that off right now," Alice snarled as she glared at him, "You're not going anywhere, you hear me!?" The agent merely gave her a humoring look before allowing his eyes to close, the only sign he was still alive was the unsteady rise and fall of his chest. With renewed vigor, Alice focused what energy she could in her body praying if for once she could extend her mutation outwards to help someone else. Coulson, seeming to know what she was attempting looked up at her with a slight frown, confused by the troubled and nearly horrified look that had taken residence on her normally stoic features. "For once in your pathetic, mutant life Alice do something!"

"Alice, save it and don't worry about me. Heal yourself."

She shook her head wildly and it was the first time Coulson seemed to realize that she truly was the as old as she was as the lines creased at her youthful features frozen by time and her desperation became visible. Her eyes were wide and almost child-like in their horror as they began to outline in unshed tears as she continued to curse herself and her mutation, "I-I can't! I really lost the genetic- _fucking_ -lottery when I got a mutation that only works for me…" After a moment, Alice allowed her eyes to slide closed before she attempted to dig deeper into herself and once she found a small flicker of what she believed was her mutation she began to push it in an attempt to manipulate it.

She had never done anything like this before and she only hoped that her attempt to heal someone else would work for once. Taking a deep breath she began to push the small energy forward and down her arms and into the palms of her hands which, by now, were layered and stained with Coulson's blood as she attempted to staunch the wound. It was as she was doing this, Fury ran into the room and grabbed Coulson's face in an attempt to focus the man.

"Sorry Boss," Coulson mumbled weakly, "The god rabbited."

"Just stay awake. Eyes on me!" The Director added forcefully when Coulson's head began to lull weakly. The agent only managed another weak smirk.

"No, I'm clocking out here…"

Fury frowned at him, refusing to allow this to be the end of one of his best agents and dearest friends, "Not an option."

"It's okay, boss." He replied with a small grunt, his breaths becoming shorter, "This was never going to work... if they didn't have something...to..."

Silence.

By mere definition it is the absence of sound, but it seemed as if time itself had stopped at the exact moment Coulson had sighed his last breath.

Tears slid passed Alice's closed eyes as she felt the man take his last breath and she attempted to push her energy forward at a more desperate rate, ignoring the intense and prickling pain that radiated from her very core the harder she pushed herself. She ignored when medical staff entered the room, her focus completely on attempting to bring Coulson back. She had not realized when she had begun openly sobbing, or when she had released the agent's wound to tug at her wild and tangled mane in an effort to distract herself from the pain of knowing that she was powerless in helping to save Coulson's life.

Guilt washed over her like the waves of a tsunami and she could do nothing to bear the crushing weight. She did not watch when they took Coulson away and she did not turn when Fury stood directly behind her. She did not need to see his face to know that he was perhaps blaming her for the death of Phil Coulson and she could not find it in her to be angry at him for it. She had been powerless against that mercenary and she had especially been powerless against Loki.

She continued to replay her last conversation with Coulson wondering what it had been they had even spoken about as she had only known him a handful of days and she continued to replay the last few moments of his life, until she had felt the last breath of life leave his lungs and it was that, that crushed her already fragile soul into oblivion.

For all she cared, she had killed Agent Phil Coulson.


	7. Run Boy Run

_As the Sky May Fall  
_ _The Avengers  
07_

* * *

**** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS THEMES OF VIOLENCE, WAR AND DEPICTIONS OF DEATH. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ****

* * *

She had never dealt well with death despite being surrounded with it from a young age and it certainly had not changed now that Coulson had died defending her. After they had taken the agent's body from the detention level, Alice had rushed from the area in an attempt to avoid Fury's reaction in the face of her own guilt.

She had not been able to save the man.

It was foolish in hindsight, Alice knew. She had seen hundreds of men die over time both in the line of fire and not over the decades as a nurse, but for some reason this death hit her harder than she anticipated. Maybe it had been that it was the first man she had lost in the line of fire since World War II, or maybe it was because he was the first person who hadn't truly judged her for what she was. Alice wasn't willing to dive deep into the why or the how, but all she could truly focus on was her own failure. She was a nurse, she was meant to help others. Logically she knew a wound like the one the agent had sustained would have been near impossible to heal with regularly practiced medicine, but she was a mutant...she should have been the exception!

Coulson had been nothing if not kind to her and she was angry that she couldn't save him because she had easily lived five of his lives and what _right_ did she have to keep living when she felt so undeserving? What right did she have over a man like Coulson? Why was it that the men and women who deserved to live the most died and the ones who deserved to die kept on living. _What's the message in that?_ She snorted at the thought, her eyes narrowed into a glare at her hands. The true answer was that there was no right or wrong answer.

She had lost track of time and since then she had found some solace within the metal beams and rafters of the helicarrier's loading and storage area. With her knees pulled to her chin and her arms locking them to her chest, she avoided looking at her hands in fear of Coulson's blood still being there and reminding her that it was because of her that he had not survived. She had managed to at least wash her hands raw of the blood that had once stained them and clean herself up slightly, but had avoided the medical bay in fear of running into any of the other Avengers and their judgmental stares.

Alice was more than aware that she tended to walk a rather thin line with both the members of the Avengers as well as the S.H.I.E.L.D agents who had managed to bring her into this madness. Though, looking back, she assumed it was for the best – granted she was terrible at fighting, but at the very least she contributed to saving them from world domination through her knowledge. She scoffed and shook her head of the thought; _wishful thinking_ , she told herself silently and with a glare at the beam before her.

"This spot taken?"

Alice nearly jumped out of her skin, her body tensing at the unexpected presence to her left on the opposite beam. Slowly, her eyes shifted to the newcomer only to frown to herself as it was someone she did not immediately recognize. He wore a S.H.I.E.L.D uniform, the arms completely missing from the ensemble of leathers and straps, his blonde hair cropped and appeared as if he constantly ran his hand through the strands giving them a tussled appearance. Blue eyes peered at her from a handsome and roguish face, the angles; while not as pronounced as Loki's, still created a visage as if the man was created rather than born. She studied him carefully and recognition dawned on her suddenly: this man was Hawkeye, the very same that they had initially tried to save.

"Not interested in talking?" He questioned after he garnered no response from her, "That's okay, I get it. I needed some time to myself as well…always did find comfort in heights." She only stared at him from over her folded arms and he smirked when he noticed the calculating look to her mixed irises as if she was attempting to figure out the reason to his presence. "Name's Clint Barton, Hawkeye –"

"I'm aware of who you are."

Clint blinked at the waspish response, not entirely expecting her to sound as if his presence was wronging her in some way despite the soft and raspy alto of her voice. He then realized why as he took in her battered appearance. There was a rather nasty cut that lingered across the bridge of her nose and her eye and cheek were already bruising from what he assumed was a fight during the god's escape. From the looseness of her shirt, he could not tell if she bore any injuries to her torso, but the way she sat told him that she suffered from bruised or cracked ribs at the very least. Her arms also bore cuts and scrapes, bruises the size of fists easily shone against her sandy skin and he immediately took to her cut and swollen knuckles – the skin appearing raw and irritated. Her hair had been hastily pulled back into a semblance of a ponytail at the back of her head, but her bangs had fallen from the arrangement and curtained most of the front of her face as well as her eyes, which he could tell were narrowed at him in annoyance.

Clint knew she had been there when Coulson died, but he did not understand why she was bearing the weight of his death alone when the rest of the Avengers seemed to have hardened their resolve. He recalled Agent Sitwell's annoyed response when he had asked about Coulson, his blame settling on a " _no-good mutant, who had made things worse by her very presence alone_ ", if he recalled their words correctly. Looking at the so-called mutant, all he saw was a kid who was trying desperately to cling to whatever bit of normalcy – any little bit of sanity she could. A frown tugged at his lips as he appraised her silently, taking note of the deep hazel optics that stared ahead of her, unseeingly, and laden heavily with guilt and sadness if a light sprinkling of annoyance.

She was only a kid.

"Well, that's not particularly fair." He voiced through a deep sigh in an attempt to keep the conversation going, "You know me but I damn sure don't know who you are."

A snort was Alice's immediate response before she answered him dryly and laced with a deep bitterness that seemed to surprise the blonde haired man, "That's surprising. I would've thought they would have been reviewing my file for termination after Loki's escape."

"I don't see why…"

She stared at him incredulously, her head lifting in her disbelief, "Seriously? I'm surprised every goddamn person on this stupid, floating contraption hasn't pinned Coulson's death on me."

Clint did not want to admit that he had heard the whispering enough in passing to know that no one on board was particularly fond of the woman, but he had always been someone who needed to learn for himself. He did not see the woman they described. He saw her torment, her guilt and her insecurity for what it was. They blamed her for leading them down this path – for knowing so much about the god that it made her seem a likely ally, but Clint knew it could not have been true because if she had been allying with Loki, he would have known about it.

"Well…"

"You don't have to sugarcoat it for me, Barton…I can hear them from up here." At his questioning look she sighed deeply, the puff of air she blew moving a few strands of hair from her face. "There's an air vent to your left and people aren't exactly quiet about their disapproval."

After a moment, Clint sighed and ran a large hand through his hair, "Listen, kid, people are always going to find someone to blame. Since you're new, they're gonna blame you. Don't let it get to you. I've seen enough and know enough that you weren't the one who killed Coulson. The one person I blame for that is Loki."

She was silent for a moment and Clint almost missed her broken whisper as it fell into her crossed arms from where they drew her knees into her chest, "But I couldn't save him…all the knowledge of two hundred years…all the knowledge in the world and I couldn't do anything."

Clint frowned, "Two hundre– what? Never mind; look the wounds Coulson suffered couldn't be miraculously mended even with Captain Kirk standing over him." He almost smiled when she snorted, whether out of laughter or disgruntlement he could not tell – he'd take what he could, "You can't blame yourself for the decision of someone else…besides, Coulson knew what he was signing up for when he became an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D, we all know that the risk of dying is more often a reality as opposed to the alternative."

Alice shifted, frowning softly in thought as she considered the agent's words before sighing deeply, "What are you asking me to do? Pretend it didn't happen?"

"No. I'm telling you to get your ass into gear and decide if you're going to help us kick this wannabe-god's ass or if you're gonna sit up here and beat yourself up over something you can't change."

The woman's head snapped up to look at Barton with thinly veiled annoyance at the statement only to see a man who was coping in the only way he knew how. Taking a long, hard look at the agent she saw a man who had been tortured – whether recently or not she could not determine – and was willing to deal justice and retribution to the one being that deserved it the most at that moment.

Loki was going to have a real problem on his hands.

After a moment of silence, in which Clint studied her closely, he informed her, "We're gathering up our resources and heading out in the next fifteen minutes. I hope you decide that sitting here wallowing isn't going to solve the problem…but that's on you, kid." With that stated, the man shifted and disappeared down a rope that Alice had not noticed was attached to the beam the entire time she had been seated in the rafters.

She considered what the agent was saying before frowning.

_They won't just welcome you back, you know._ Her conscious argued. It was a voice so soothing it appeared like a viper in the back of her mind.

_Shut up_ , she told the voice, _you don't know that._

_Look at the little mutant! She thinks she can smooth things over so nicely with the people who would rather she died in place of the agent!_

Alice's head bowed. The voice in her head made a valid point, but she was more confused than ever. Replaying the moment with Coulson did nothing to strengthen her resolve – instead it only seemed to make that deep pit of her stomach ache that she could do absolutely nothing with all of her power to save the man.

_That's not true! You told them lies! You're a fraud, a fake – you could have saved him…you were too weak! That's why you said what you did._

"No…I didn't…"

_Yes you did. You **could have** used your mutation, but you just aren't strong enough to. It's most unfortunate that the only thing that could have saved that man was you, but your own inability to wield your own gift…such a shame really. Two hundred years and you've mastered nothing!_

"Stop it."

_Oh no, have I harmed your feeble little feelings? Have I made you **hate** yourself enough? The only reason why he isn't here is because **you could do nothing but watch**_!

Alice whimpered.

_You're worthless! This is exactly what **he** meant when he said you'd never make it…you failed. You failed your tests and you are an abomination! A silly little girl who thought she could save the world. **PATHETIC**!_

"That's not true," She argued with herself, her voice quaking slightly as she fought off her inner turmoil – a voice she refused to name or acknowledge. "You did this to me…I was not always like this."

_You worthless little bitch! You were created! We can unmake you!_

The sound of one of the quinjets activating ruined her inner battle and she stood, her eyes searching for the jet that was leaving and frowning. "Shit!"

Without a second thought, she jumped to the adjacent beam and slid down the rope that Hawkeye had not bothered to collect upon leaving her what seemed like moments ago now and as her feet hit the ground below she took off at a sprint. She knew she could not catch the other quinjet and so veered slightly to the left where another hangar bay was located and leapt into a single-pilot. She then paused as if what she was doing was suddenly registering with her and she frowned in thought, "What the hell am I doing!?" Looking around the cockpit she blinked, "Well…can't be any different than the P51 Mustangs."

With a final shrug and a strengthening to her resolve she began flipping switches, satisfied that the engine seemed to start without an issue. She quickly buckled herself into the seat and grabbed a hold of the horseshoe-like wheel before taking a deep breath. Alice was more than aware that in her current state she would be powerless against Loki's forces and even Loki himself, especially with her body still trying to recover from her array of injuries. Steeling her nerves she pushed the steering wheel forward, the craft moving with her. It was sudden that S.H.I.E.L.D agents rushed into the hangar in an attempt to stop her.

" _Miss Alexander, get out of the craft…_ "

With a set frown she began flipping more switches, "You don't open that door, Fury, I'm blasting my way out of here."

" _I won't say it again –_ "

"I'm not asking you to. You're going to open that door and I'm going to help the team in the only way I can." The radio was silent and Alice glared at the radio, "You have five seconds to open that door….four….three…two…one…"

When Fury refused to respond she placed her fingers over the triggers and fired, blasting a hole in the side of the ship and pushing the wheel forward, the craft propelling with her movement. As she neared the end of the runway she pulled the steering wheel back and down and to her utmost excitement the craft took flight.

~ _Meanwhile_ ~

" _Stark we're on your three, heading Northeast_."

"What'd you do, stop for drive-thru!?" Tony snapped back as he led a troop of Chitauri through the buildings in an effort to divert their attention from the police that were attempting to evacuate the citizens in immediate danger and fight off what aliens they could. "Swing up Park, I'm gonna lay them out for you _._ " Swooping past his tower he noticed briefly that Thor was engaging Loki in a close combat, before banking left and zooming past the corner of another building, some of his pursuers crashing and exploding. Tony would not permit himself to laugh no matter how much he wanted to. This was the most fun he had had in a while, despite the whole end-of-the-world destruction hanging over their head.

As he swung passed another building the blasting of the Quinjet's machine guns alerted him to the team's arrival and he allowed himself a moment to breathe. " _Sir, we have more incoming._ " Jarvis spoke through his helm and the billionaire nodded briefly.

"Fine, let's keep them occupied."

Banking around another building, Tony approached another group of aliens and smirked behind his helm. Barton, meanwhile, guided the jet towards STARK tower. " _Target sighted_."

"Nat?"

"I see them!"

It was as he leveled with Loki and Thor's position and opened fire with the turret that they were suddenly blasted by Loki's scepter in a moment of him throwing the behemoth away from him. Barton attempted to steer their landing to be a bit easier, but he knew that this was something that would hinder them and their next priority would have to be helping the civilians on ground level and hope that Thor could handle his brother.

After the rough landing, Natasha shared a look with Hawkeye briefly before throwing her seatbelt off and following after the blonde archer and patriot, "We gotta get back up there!" Steve called back as the three began to run back towards the intersection where Stark Tower loomed in the distance.

As they came to a stop at a deserted intersection just before the New York Public Library, a bellow unlike any they had heard thus far seemed to shake the very fabric of the city and out of the portal came a large whale-like alien. With another bellow from the beast, the Chitauri began chirping and cawing, screams and screeches that were otherworldly in what seemed like victory. Out of the larger alien, more Chitauri appeared and Steve, Natasha and Clint could do nothing but watch in resignation, exasperation and something akin to both horror and amazement.

"Stark, are you seeing this!?"

" _Seeing…still working on believing._ " He replied as he flanked the alien, only a wall of buildings and a block separating him and the large creature, " _Where's Banner or Wonderland? Have either shown up yet?_ "

"Banner and Alice?"

" _Just keep me posted. Jarvis, find me a soft spot._ "

Steve turned his attention back to the oncoming Chitauri and frowned. The fight was only beginning and already the odds seemed slim in their favor. Suddenly, Loki and a group of flying Chitauri appeared, releasing blasts on the people pinned down below and immediately the three were moving into action, unable to do much about the aliens on the flying chariots. The tree grounded heroes scooted behind a cab in an effort to regroup and Clint frowned, "We've got civilians trapped."

"Loki," Steve frowned as he tried to come up with a plan as he watched the destruction, "They're fish in a barrel down there." Suddenly Chitauri dropped in behind them and the three scrambled into new positions as they began fighting off the aliens as best as they could, but with every one they took out it seemed like three more would take its place.

"We're pinned down!" Natasha growled back as she took down another alien, moving her head briefly out of the way of one of Hawkeye's arrows as he took out another alien that was attempting to flank them.

"Well if you've got ideas now's the time to share them, Nat!"

" _Need help?_ "

A smile broke Clint's taut features as he looked up to see another fighter jet fly passed them overhead, dropping a few bombs before circling around, "What took you so long? I told you that you had fifteen minutes!"

" _Had to face down a few demons,_ " Alice replied after a moment of radio silence. " _There's not much I can do – but I'll provide as much air support as I can until I either crash or get shot down either is possible as I actually have no idea how to fly this damn thing…from there I'll make it up as I go. You've got five minutes Rogers!_ "

A small smile appeared on Natasha's lips as she faced the patriot, "We've got this, go!"

"You think you can hold them off?"

Hawkeye smiled widely at Steve before pressing a button on his bow and grabbing an arrow, "Captain, it'd be my genuine pleasure."

Alice circled the jet around, after having a few close calls on the way there she had finally figured out how to at least keep the quinjet from crashing and use the weapons. Her eyes darted around the area of the battle before turning her eyes on another group of Chitauri who were tailing Tony before opening fire on his tail.

"Need some help there, Hasbro?"

" _Nice to finally see you Wonderland!_ "

She merely nodded from her window with a small smirk twitching at her lips, "Keep that one, I quite like it."

" _You got it_." He sassed over the line, though the smile was conveyed. " _Get moving!_ "

She nodded once more, knowing he couldn't see it before turning the jet and flying in the other direction and closer to where the Chitauri were coming from the portal in droves. Flicking the hover switch she grabbed a hold of the gun control and letting loose with the ammunition that was on board. Alice knew for a fact that she would either be shot out of the sky or run out of ammo before the end of the battle and neither was preferable. She was tired of sitting around and letting the others do the fighting. As much as she hated to admit it, she did not want to see any of the Avengers die. She may not have liked many of them, in fact, she was positive the feeling was both mutual and amplified one hundred-fold, but that did not change the fact that they did not need to die. Steeling her nerves she kept her eyes sharply on the aliens falling through the portal in front of her in hopes of limiting their numbers just a bit so that the other heroes could get a foothold in this battle.

It was sudden when her jet shook violently and she realized why as she noticed not only did a Chitauri quadrant sneak up on her, but had landed on her craft and were trying to infiltrate the cockpit. Growling, she threw the seat belt off of her and jumped over the pilot's seat in order to get to the back of the jet. Alice knew she could not fight them without abilities and quickly began searching for a parachute. Another blast rocked the side of her jet and with a cry she fell and smacked her head into the side of the jet. Groaning she shook the ailment away before forcing herself to stand once more and grabbing the chute and strapping it on before grabbing whatever ammunition she could and outfitting herself, her eyes catching a first aid kit as well and snatching that. She was suddenly thankful for the tighter pants she had found stashed on board as well as the Kevlar-like turtleneck she had found before layering her sweatshirt back on top and strapping a vest to hold everything together. Hitting the button to open the bay door she cocked her handguns and rolled out her shoulders before taking a second to consider the goggles off to the side.

As soon as the bay finished opening Chitauri were crawling in and with a smirk she opened fire aiming for the center of their heads if possible. A click in her guns told her she had wasted her first clip and she ejected them before slapping two more in and rushing one of the aliens and riding him over the edge of the jet just as it began to fall from the sky. Locking her legs around the creature she shot it through the forehead before allowing herself to free fall for a moment. Grunting as she moved herself through the air before realizing that it would probably be a good time to pull the chute. As the fabric ripped open behind her she braced herself for the whiplash before adjusting herself once more and continuing to fire, replacing her handguns with a rifle and picking off stray cruisers as she descended.

" _Need a lift_?"

Glancing in the direction of the approaching Iron Man she swung the strap of her rifle back over her neck and trading it for a knife before working on cutting herself loose as she replied, "About to cut the line, in the market to catch me?"

" _It would be my pleasure_."

"Good 'cause I'm dropping…now!" As soon as she felt the gravity begin to pull her once more she heard the thrusters to Tony's suit and felt the sudden jerk as he grabbed her by the straps of the harness. "Nice catch!"

" _Nice outfit_ ," He snorted before swinging low to the ground, " _gotta drop you off here. Think you can make your way through?_ "

"If not I'll work on evac in the area," She breathed as she removed the chute harness and readjusting the vest-like harness that was equipped with her borrowed munitions. "I'll work my way back to Stark Tower while I do."

" _Atta girl. Go get 'em_."

"And stay on comm!" She called as he took of once more before shifting her rifle to her shoulder and making her way through the streets of Midtown. After a few moments she reactivated her earpiece before hailing anyone that would answer. Finally she managed to get the channel the other Avengers were on before smiling, "Sorry I'm late to the party. I'm on 40th and 7th…where are you guys?"

" _Cops are setting a perimeter as far down as 39th,_ " Steve answered breathlessly, " _Meet us uptown for a regroup at the Library off East 42nd_ _and 5th_."

"Copy!" She called as she opened fire on a squadron of aliens and calling at people to move and get down to the subways and off of the street, her eyes narrowing in concentration. This was a warzone and it was familiar to her as much as she hated to admit as much. As she made her way uptown she fell into practiced motions and it brought an eerie calm over her once frayed nerves and things fell back into razor focus. She wasn't far from where Steve had said they were positioned and as she turned a corner she saw Barton and Natasha taking on another group of Chitauri before turning and beginning to flank them, her shots well practiced as she rejoined them and after a few moments, Steve came into view as well. Together, with little communication, they fought their way back into the clearing of taxis that Clint and Natasha had been using for cover.

"Nice to see you in person!"

Aiming for an alien that appeared over Natasha's shoulder, Alice fired and cocked her rifle before offering the spy a small grin, "Nice to see you too. Sorry I'm late."

"I'm just glad you managed to get your head outta your ass," Clint called back as he shot another arrow. Alice only shook her head before taking aim once more releasing her tense hold on the weapon as the remaining Chitauri were fried by lightning. Clint jogged up to her and gave her a quick once sided hug that startled the mutant before offering the agent a small smile and nodding before turning her attention to Thor who landed in the now cleared area.

Steve approached him as they all took the brief moment to regroup. And Alice released the clip of ammo before reloading with a fresh clip and holding it aloft in her hands. "What's the story upstairs?"

"The powers surrounding the cube is impenetrable." The god reported breathing heavily as he nursed his side and straitening as if shaking himself from his own ailments and standing next to the patriot. Around them sounds of battle did not decrease as Tony flew overhead and taking out another tail as he did.

" _Thor's right, we gotta deal with these guys_!"

They all watched as he disappeared around another corner and Natasha sighed as she looked to Steve, brows furrowed and exhaustion clearly beginning to creep into her posture. "How do we do this?"

"As a team."

Alice straightened as Steve glanced at them all, his eyes resting on her for a moment and she nodded. This was the Steve Rogers she remembered and allowing him to lead allowed her to fall easily back into the role of a soldier, one that she hadn't been unused to playing when he was around, but for now the feeling was refreshing. The patriot offered her a small smile, one that she returned before placing her hand on Natasha's shoulder in an effort to help the woman stand straight.

Thor frowned as he glanced at them, "I have unfinished business with Loki."

"Yeah," Clint called back drolly as he adjusted an arrowhead, "Get in line."

"Save it," Steve snapped briefly, "Loki's gonna keep this fight focused on us and that's what we need. Without him these things could run wild. We got Stark up top, he's gonna need us to…"

They all paused when they heard the humming and sputtering of a motor bike to see Bruce, who watched them all warily. With what looked like great effort he got off of the bike and walked towards them as they walked forward to meet him, "So," He began with a sigh, "This all seems horrible."

"I've seen worse."

"Sorry."

Alice glanced back and forth between the two with raised brows suddenly wondering what had occurred on the helicarrier when they had been attacked. Natasha straightened and her tone lighter from the grumbled sarcasm she had used to address Bruce previously.

"No…we could use a little worse."

"Stark," Steve called over the comm, "We got him."

" _Banner_?"

"Just like you said."

" _Tell him to suit up…I'm bringing the party to you._ "

Alice frowned before turning suddenly and noticing him flying around the corner about fifteen blocks down with a large whale-like Chitauri in pursuit, the creature crashing and roaring behind him. She braced herself, her rifle returning to her hands as she adjusted the butt against her shoulder and she briefly noticed the other Avengers brace around her as well.

"I…I don't see how that's a party." Natasha remarked with heavy sarcasm earning a snorted laugh from the mutant as Tony pulled up suddenly after swooping low enough to dodge between cars and allowing the leviathan to crash behind him like a freight train. Banner glanced at them before stepping forward, Steve shuffling after him briefly.

"Dr. Banner…" Bruce turned to look at Steve with a quirked brow, "Now might be a really good time for you to get angry."

"That's my secret, Captain," Steve frowned in confusion as Banner spoke, a smirk twitching at his lips, "I'm _always_ angry." No sooner had he said it his body began to morph: swelling, stretching and hardening before he released a roar as he punched the leviathan effectively stopping the creature and causing it to accordion in on itself.

" _Hold on!_ " Tony called above them before shooting a rocket into a soft spot that he found exposed and causing the creature to explode.

Alice immediately dove beneath the nearest cover as pieces rained down around them and looking out she noticed the others had done the same. The Chitauri howled at the defeat of the monster as if mourning it and the mutant frowned, coming out of cover and readying her ammo with the rest of the Avengers as they stood in a circle with their backs towards each other. She found herself standing next to Steve and she nodded to him.

"Guys!"

Natasha's call made them all look up to notice the portal was releasing more and more of the creatures, two leviathans circling each other before heading in different directions. Tony growled from beneath his helm, " _Call it, Cap_."

"Alright, listen up. Until we can close that portal up there, we're gonna use containment. Barton, I want you on that roof, eyes on everything. Call out patterns and strays. Stark, you got the perimeter. Anything gets more than three blocks out; you turn it back or turn it to ash."

Barton stepped next to Tony and offered him a smirk, "Wanna give me a lift?"

" _Right_ ," Tony nodded, " _Better clench up, Legolas_."

As the two took off, Steve turned to the god, "Thor, you've gotta try and bottleneck that portal. Slow them down…you got the lightening. Light the bastards up." As Thor nodded and took flight once more he turned his gaze to Alice and Natasha, "You, me and Alice, we stay here on the ground. Keep the fighting here - Alice try and stay out of sight and cover our flanks." When both nodded he turned his gaze to the large green mutant with a smirk, "And Hulk?" The creature growled in question, "Smash." With a smile he launched himself towards a building and disappeared, taking Chitauri out with him as he did.

Alice cocked her rifle and setting it back into place on her shoulder and getting ready for the next wave of creatures. Steve sided up to her as he adjusted his shield and glanced at her, "You ready for this?"

"As I'll ever be." She shrugged, the end of her rifle pointed at the ground, "I hate to admit that this is kinda like riding a bike."

Natasha watched the exchange with quirked brows as she reloaded her guns. Steve frowned as he glanced at her, "What's that supposed to mean?"

"This kind of atmosphere," She nodded to the carnage around them. "It's like war all over again." When the patriot frowned at her she sighed, "Look, I'm not saying it's a good thing, but it's the only thing I happen to be good at." When both spy and patriot looked at her in question she frowned. "I've been alive for two hundred and fifty-eight years and I've participated in at least seventeen different conflicts within the U.S and that's including the war where I met you and Bucky. It's what I know and it's the only thing I know to fall back on. Hand to hand combat, forget it, but put a gun in my hand and I'll be the best damn cover you ever had."

Steve frowned and Natasha turned to look at her, "Long distance…"

"Long distance," Alice nodded. "I'm a hell of a shot and sometimes I can get myself out of trouble if trouble comes too close."

"Alice…" Steve drew off for a moment, sending Natasha a significant look and the spy nodded and turned away as he looked at the smaller woman. "I'm sorry…for what happened to Phil." When she scoffed he frowned, "I know you didn't kill him and I trust you enough to know you didn't do it. But why are you so hell-bent on being here?"

"Because, Steve," She snapped at him with a glare, "if I sit blindly by when I know I could've done something to help save others, then what good am I? Why do I get to continue living unapologetically for _years_ when I've tried so damn hard to take the place of so many good men and women who deserve life more than me? What right do I have? If I sit back and let others fight and die around me when I know I can do something about it...then I'm a part of a larger problem."

"Alice..."

"You don't get to tell me that I'm wrong. Just accept what help I can give."

Steve considered her for a moment before nodding as if hearing the answer he had needed and offered her a small smile, "After this is over we need to sit down somewhere."

"Coffee," She nodded with a weak smile in return, "My treat."

"Are you two done?" Natasha offered off to the side though not without humor as a group of aliens sighted them and were making their way forward and firing, "Because we've got company."

"Ladies first."

"By your leave, Captain"

**-0-**

" ** _Stark, you got a lot of strays sniffing to your tail!_** " Barton called out over the comms as the group continued to battle the Chitauri.

Alice had taken to alternating between her rifle as well as another she had grabbed before leaping from her jet as she covered Natasha and Steve from being flanked and occasionally needing to protect herself as well. The three made a great team as they fought the aliens on the ground, though the battle was beginning to wear on them. Alice's shoulder was beginning to ache from the recoil of her rifle and Natasha and Steve's blows had slowed significantly but not enough to render them in serious trouble.

" _Just trying to keep them off the streets._ "

" ** _Well, they can't bank worth a damn. Find a tight corner._** "

" _I will roger that._ " Tony's voice cracked slowly as he took another lap overhead as the airborne fighters kept tight on his tail. As he disappeared, Alice released another round on a Chitauri that was coming too close to jumping Natasha as she blocked another from hitting Steve. After a few moments of silence his voice chirped over the lines once more, " _Nice call. What else you got?_ "

" ** _Well, Thor's taking on a squadron down on 6th_** ," Came Barton's airy reply as he fired off a few more arrows - explosions signalling he had hit his marks.

" _And he didn't invite me_."

"Don't sound so down, Stark." Alice breathed as she continued firing shots in quick succession, "I'm sure the invite got lost in the mail…we all know how bad USPS is these days." She grunted when she felt one of the alien's blasts graze her shoulder and turned to find an alien behind her. Dropping her gun she raised her arms as it swung at her before kicking out and creating space as she released her hand gun and fired three quick shots into its skull and sighing as it fell dead. She turned when she heard Natasha grunt loudly and Alice turned releasing another two shots into the alien's back and giving her enough time to hook her leg around its neck and shock it with her widow's bite before stealing its gun and blasting it with it. The two women nodded to each other before jumping, both raising their firearms as Steve landed between them.

Sighing and taking the moment to recollect themselves both turned, Alice working out her shoulder as her mutation took over and Natasha leaning on the car she had been slammed into just a moment before. "Cap, none of this is gonna mean a damn thing if we don't close that portal."

"Our biggest guns couldn't touch it."

"Well, maybe it's not about guns."

A Chitauri contingent flew overhead and the three of them watched as they disappeared around another corner and she gestured to them with a pant, briefly wiping the blood from her split lip. Steve glanced at her, frowning, "You wanna get up there, you're gonna need a ride."

They watched as more Chitauri landed on the edge of the bridge and Alice frowned, her feet sliding back into position once more as she readied herself to cover Steve and Natasha for whatever it was they were planning.

She turned to him and rolled her eyes, tossing the alien rifle to the brunette who deftly caught it before walking to the other side of the bridge and nodding, "I got a ride…I could use a boost though." Steve nodded in resignation before positioning himself on the other side and raising his shield in front of him just as shots rang out from the alien rifle Alice had in her hands - deciding to use it instead of her rifle with limited munitions.

"Are you sure about this?"

"Yeah," She chirped breathily, "It's gonna be fun."

He nodded and she ran at him, leaping onto the car for added height before hitting his shield. At that moment, Steve used his strength to give her the boost she needed and watched as the spy gripped the chariot overhead and took off. He then refocused his attention on the converging aliens, watching as the brunette, smudged with dirt and gore narrowed her eyes, firing at every creature that approached without remorse and backing up steadily as they continued forward.

"Remind me," She breathed as she continued firing, "when this is all over and we all got time to ask you, Clint and Natasha to teach me how to fight because this shit sucks."

Steve laughed, the sound bubbling passed his lips without his permission as he turned, punching an approaching alien that was flanking them, "You got yourself a deal."

She only managed a smile as she swung the alien rifle around, using it as both a staff and gun as the aliens surrounded them. Though, despite the two of them working relatively seamlessly it was beginning to look like they were going to be overrun. Just as Alice was punched in the face - the force of the hit driving her into the ground as she was briefly stunned - Tony appeared and blasted a few of the aliens from around her before tag-teaming with Steve using a combinations of hand to hand, his blasters and Steve's shield to take them out before taking off once more into the sky and disappearing. Steve helped Alice to her feet before Alice removed her hand gun and shot under Steve's arm at another alien just as he swung his shield to protect her back from one swinging its bladed rifle at her.

The two spun away from the other, moving in tandem as they began fighting the next wave of aliens and she heard Steve yell for her to duck and she immediately dropped, his shield flying over her and bouncing off of three different aliens before returning back to him. Alice continued shooting, reloading faster than she ever thought possible as she ran on pure adrenaline, the battle continuing to rage around them and soon she found herself back to back with Steve once more and she felt more than heard him chuckle.

"Just like old times right?"

She snorted, "Yeah, _now_ you wanna remember the _good ol' days_?"

"No time like the present! C'mon Alice, I can do this all day!" He called back.

"Cheeky bastard," She grumbled mirthfully before the both of them jumped away from each other as an alien dove at them.

Alice spun allowing the edge of the alien rifle to sink into her assailant before she pulled the trigger shooting the next two that came up behind their fellow and downing them. She heard Steve cry out suddenly and she turned to glance over her shoulder briefly, seeing him on the ground and dodging stabs from another alien and she abandoned the rifle before releasing another one of her own, firing three rounds at the creature's back and giving Steve an opening to bat it away.

She cried out suddenly as her side, which had yet to fully heal from the scepter's blast only a few days ago, ripped open once more as an alien stabbed his bladed rifle forward just as she had turned back around. Before it could fire she squeezed the trigger of her handgun and sighed as it dropped, but that left the blade in her. Steve rushed up to her and looked down at her, his brows furrowed in worry.

"What happened?"

"It's the same spot as the scepter blast," She breathed heavily, wincing as she looked down at the shaft sticking out of her, "Damnit!"

Steve shushed her as he gently leaned her back into a fallen vehicle, avoiding jostling her as much as possible as her side bloomed crimson, the color swelling outwards at a rate faster than he was comfortable with. Despite her constant reassurances that her mutation did not allow her to die he wasn't so sure she would be okay. He hadn't known the scepter's burn still hadn't healed as most of her injuries took mostly a day to right themselves and he watched as she glanced down at the rifle once more and then looking him in the eyes.

"We need to take it out." When Steve went to rebuke her she shook her head violently as sweat began to bead on her forehead, "It needs to come out otherwise my body will go into shock and that's the _last_ thing we need right now. My body needs to register that it can start healing and it can't do that with this thing sticking out of me."

"Why didn't you tell me you were fighting wounded!?"

"Would it have mattered?" She snapped back without her usual heat and Steve's brow furrowed, "We didn't exactly have time to talk about it and it's been slow going either way. I need this to come out otherwise I won't be able to do anything about it anyway."

" ** _What's going on, Cap?_** "

Barton's voice cut through the comms and the both of them knew that the group had heard everything since they were set to connect automatically. Steve breathed harshly in frustration before sighing in resignation. Looking down at the woman once more as if asking her for her permission and she met his look steadily before nodding as he grabbed the end of the rifle, careful not to hold anywhere near where it would trigger the gun to go off before frowning.

"Stuck with the wrong end of an alien blaster," Alice answered breathily to Barton's question before looking up at Steve. "Do it."

Steve sighed once more before gripping the shaft of the rifle tighter and yanking, trying to keep the rifle as straight as possible to avoid further damage to his comrade. Alice cried out before her hands immediately flew to cover the area and applying pressure, her hands soaking red in a matter of moments. "Alice…"

"I'll be alright," She groaned after a moment, "Don't know how much use I'll be for the next few minutes…think you can cover me while I try to get my mutation to kick into overdrive?"

" ** _I'll keep watch up here too_** ," Barton's voice cracked once more as two explosions echoed not too far from where they were. Steve looked down at her, half cradling her as she breathed heavily.

"How much time do you need?"

"After you help me? About five minutes." She answered as she pushed his hands away, "Get this off of me." She gestured to her harness and he quickly set about helping her before staring as she lifted her arms with effort, "I need the sweatshirt off, too." She nearly laughed at the uncomfortable look Steve shot her before helping her take off the article of clothing and leaving her in the Kevlar turtleneck. She rolled up the bottom of her shirt, straining to sit herself up and seeing her struggle Steve moved the car closer to her and she shot him a grateful look. Removing a knife from her pants she handed the knife, hilt first, to Steve and gesturing to the garment in her hands, "cut this into strips - it doesn't have to be done well." He nodded slowly, falling into the practiced motions of being ordered around by medics - Jim Morita had been just as gruff when dealing with injuries on the battlefield so he assumed it was a medic-thing - as he began cutting up the sweatshirt, making long strips watching as Alice reached into another pocket and producing a small bottle.

"What's that?"

He watched as she pulled the cork off with her teeth before unceremoniously pouring it on the wound, her body arching as she hissed, the area bubbling with foam. After she regained her breath and blinked the stars out of her eyes she nodded, "Peroxide. Managed to find some in the jet before I got shot down." She then cleaned the area tentatively but with quick efficiency before gesturing to Steve to help her wrap the area in her makeshift bandages. After a moment she breathed before nodding and equipping her gear once more. "It'll do for now. Once this is over I can see to it properly."

" _Cap, Al, you got bogeys comin' in on your three._ "

"Copy," Steve replied before glancing at her as she held out a hand and he grabbed it before hauling her to her feet. "You gonna be alright?"

She offered him a forced smile, "Right as rain."

Steve nodded before standing and staying close to her as she attempted to pull energy from other parts of her body to work on the puncture in her side. The burn from the scepter's blast still ached and wasn't fully healed, but she knew that she could force the punctured muscles to stitch back together just enough to prevent long term damage. It wouldn't do anyone any favors if she passed out in the middle of the battle because her mutation needed to draw energy from somewhere else. After a few moments and hearing Steve struggling to keep the aliens at bay long enough for her to recover, she grabbed her handgun and fired at a few of the oncoming assailants to give the patriot a moment to breathe. Forcing herself to stand, not without great effort on her part, she swung her rifle back around and began firing at the seemingly overwhelming group that had showed up in the short time Alice had taken to get herself put together. She and Steve orbited each other as they fought through the masses, weaving between each other as if they had been fighting for years when she had been non-combative for the entire time they had known each other. It surprised her that he seemed to trust her so much and she wondered if he was thinking that she was someone else and while it hurt her to think that he was comparing her to Bucky, she was also highly flattered as the handsome sergeant had been an incredible marksman and fighter.

"What were you saying before?" She barked as she fired shots consecutively, her eyes never straying from her targets, "You can do this all day?"

Steve snorted as he threw his shield, watching as Alice merely kneeled, her aim remaining true as she held the gun with practiced ease, "Old habits die hard."

"Oh, by all means continue to fight like we don't have other things to do."

"Shut up Alice," The patriot snorted, though not without humor and had the situation been any different the mutant probably would have laughed openly. She kept the urge down as her eyes narrowed again and she spun, the head of her rifle lining up behind Steve and she fired just as he leapt over her - catching his shield and rolling into the fray all in one move. "Don't tell me you're ready to take a nap!?"

"Of the two of us, which one has been stabbed and not a super-soldier?"

"Spoilsport."

The moment was interrupted when Clint's voice broke through the comms once more, " _Captain, the bank on 42nd passed Madison, they cornered a lot of civilians there._ "

She nodded glancing at Steve, "I'm good." After a moment of consideration and making sure she was true to her word the patriot nodded before looking up at Barton.

" _I'm on it._ "

With another nod from Alice he ran off and the woman straightened herself once more, "Alright Al…tighten up." Bringing her rifle to her shoulder once more and cracking her neck in a fluid motion she sought cover behind a few overturned vehicles and readying herself for the next wave.

" **Hawkeye!** " Natasha's voice crackled to life through the comms as Alice began firing at the oncoming group of aliens that were approaching her, she knew she would be able to do little to help her and so kept her focus on what she could do on the ground.

" ** _Nat, what're you doing?_** "

" **Uh…** " She heard firing happening in the distance through the link and she growled as she reloaded once more, " **a little help!** "

" ** _I've got him_** _._ "

There was an explosion overhead and while she wanted to see what was going on, she knew better and continued taking out aliens as quickly as she could. She was soon rejoined by Steve and she almost sighed in relief as the two of them worked together once more.

"I'm starting to run low on ammo…Got any ideas?"

"I can try and get you another alien rifle."

She took in Steve's now revealed features and shrugged as she cradled her weapon, "If you can get your hands on one, I'm game."

Steve charged forward, Alice swinging out from her cover once more and firing to give the patriot the opening he needed while also covering him. Steve took out five different adversaries before snatching two rifles and sprinting back to where the mutant was covering him before leaving them on the ground next to her, flinging his shield at the aliens appearing behind them. They both jumped when Thor landed behind them, the god taking in both of their appearances before waving his hammer as he took the group that were flanking. Alice sighed in relief at his appearance and began taking turns firing on both sides, her rifle being traded for one of the ones that Steve had gone on a suicide run to get and she ignored the constant pain radiating out from her side as well as the sweat that seemed to seep down into her eyes.

Suddenly Steve cried out, his body dropping as he took a hit from a Chitauri rifle and she turned releasing three shots simultaneously attempting to give him time to stand and killing the alien that had attempted to kill the patriot. Thor blocked the shots with his hammer before hitting a car forward and taking out the remainder of the group he was facing before turning and throwing his hammer away from him just as Alice shot the remainder of her group. She limped over to Steve and Thor, the god holding out his hand and pulling Steve to his feet. They both looked him over, Alice's eyes focusing on the shot that had hit him just below his chest to the side of his sternum.

"You ready for another bout?"

Steve panted, allowing Alice to look him over as he turned his eyes to the blonde behemoth, "What? You gettin' sleepy?"

Thor chuckled, patting the patriot on the shoulder before holding his hand out and recalling his hammer. He turned his head to the small woman as her hands batted Steve's away from his side so she could get a good look before noticing that she was wounded as well. "Are you well, lady Alice?"

She looked up at him and shrugged helplessly, "I can still fight, if that's what you're asking." Thor offered her a smile before frowning as she turned to him, satisfied that Steve would live and allowing the man to have a quick breather and looking him over. "How about you? You're favoring your side too."

"It is nothing."

She frowned before narrowing her eyes at him and batting his arm away from his side so she could take a look. Thor shot a pleading look at the patriot who only laughed breathily at the god's expense and shaking his head, "Don't bother. She's gonna look whether you want her to or not. Alice is a hell of a nurse."

The blonde's brows pinched, "A nurse is a healer on your world…correct?"

"Yeah," Steve answered when Alice didn't, her focus still on the crimson that blossomed on the lightening wielder's side, "She's been like that as long as I've known her."

After a quiet moment Alice straightened and nodded to herself, "It doesn't look bad…I'll have to take a better look at it when I can get my hands on a better first aid kit, but it should hold for now."

"Thank you, my lady."

Alice sighed tired of correcting the behemoth before turning to look up around them. Their work was far from over and it seemed as if they may just lose this battle, something none of them wanted to admit.

" **I can close it…Can anybody copy!? I can shut the portal down.** "

"Do it!" Steve cried after all of them had jumped when Natasha's voice had crackled to life in their ear pieces but they frowned when Tony's voice cut in immediately after.

" _No, wait!_ "

"Stark, these things are still coming!"

" _I got a nuke coming in, it's gonna blow in less than a minute…and I know just where to put it_."

Alice stared at Steve in horror when he met her eyes and while he hadn't been around to see how the War had ended, he had read that the U.S had dropped a nuclear bomb on Japan and he understood how she felt. She had still been in the service when both he and Bucky had been pronounced dead and had lived to see what war would evolve into. "He won't make it back," He heard Alice whisper and his gaze snapped to her once more to see that her hand had raised to cover her mouth, her eyes still conveying the same fear he had seen before. "He's gonna go into the portal and direct the nuke at the source…"

After a moment Steve frowned, realization dawning on his face as he thought over her words, "Stark, you know that's a one-way trip?"

Tears began to fill her eyes when Tony didn't answer.

He knew, of course he knew but he also knew that the only want to defeat the horde was to take out the source. What she hadn't expected to hear was that a nuclear bomb had been headed for New York and immediately she wondered who had given the order. Were they really willing to risk the lives of eight million people and the after effects of the bomb just to _hopefully_ destroy the alien army? Alice knew the answer, but she still couldn't believe that it had been an option in the first place. She looked up suddenly when she heard Tony's suit and watched as he, along with the bomb intended for Midtown turned upwards and disappeared into the portal beyond. The next few moments were silent between the Avengers, as they waited with bated breath for any sign that Tony had succeeded and Alice jumped while Steve and Thor turned as all of the Chitauri seemed to power down and fall silent.

"He did it…"

She hadn't meant to speak, but she couldn't help herself before turning her gaze skyward hoping beyond anything that Iron Man would fly out of that portal and they could end this once and for all. Everything had fallen silent and the minutes seemed to last forever before Steve winced.

"Close it."

Alice stared unblinkingly at the sky despite the tears leaving trails down her dirt-smudged cheeks, watching as the portal closed and yet her eyes still searched before she noticed it. Falling from the sky was none other than Tony Stark and she felt an immediate rush of relief at seeing him.

"Son of a bitch," Steve breathed, smiling at both the brunette and Thor before frowning as Tony continued to plummet to the ground at speeds that he shouldn't have if everything was alright. Thor grunted, beginning to swing his hammer by the loop.

"He's not slowing down!"

Just as Thor was about to take off, the Hulk appeared with a mighty roar, catching the falling man and slowing both of their descent with the side of a building before landing before them and tossing the man onto the ground. Thor was quick to remove Tony's mask as Steve and Alice crowded over him with the Hulk crouched on his other side. Alice frowned as she tried to get to Tony's neck but his suit was blocking her. "Damnit all…I need to see if I can find a pulse!"

Steve leaned forward trying to feel breath to signify that the man was still alive before looking down sadly reaching out and stilling her fingers with a frown before shaking his head, trying to ignore the tears in her eyes as well as the trembling of her lips. She had already watched one man die in front of her that day and now she had to watch a second. He rubbed her arm softly in comfort as she leaned into him, her small frame completely dwarfed by him and he suddenly realized how small she was. After a few moments of silence, in which Tony remained unconscious Hulk let out a roar that made everyone jump including the once unmoving genius.

"What the _hell!?"_ He breathed after a moment of trying to regain his breath earning a small laugh from Steve, a smile from Thor and a relieved hiccup from Alice as her tears renewed without her consent. Taking in their faces he groaned after Hulk roared his victory once more, "What just happened? Please tell me nobody kissed me?"

"Hate to break it to you, but no kisses." Alice smirked down at him despite the moisture on her cheeks. Steve heaved a breathy chuckle as he looked down at the man.

"We won."

There was a beat of silence before Tony groaned a cheer, "Alright. Hurray…Good job guys. Let's just not come in tomorrow…let's just take a day." He groaned softly, still lying on his back before he looked them all over, his eyes landing on the Hulk, "Have you ever tried shawarma?" When the Hulk blew out a huff of air he continued, "There's a shawarma joint about two blocks from here. I don't know what it is, but I wanna try it."

Thor merely looked at him in confusion before looking up at the battered Stark Tower, "We're not finished yet."

"And then shawarma after."

They helped Tony to his feet where he grunted as Alice threw her arms around him before laughing at him. "You need to build a protocol into your suit that at least allows your neck to be exposed when your mask comes off so people can check for a pulse…alright?"

The man looked at her as he allowed both her and Steve to drape his arms over their shoulders as they made their way towards the tower and allowing them to carry his weight, "I'll see what I can do Puss in Boots."

"You better," She groused. "I cried over you…that's against the rules."

"So you say," He groaned suddenly when she smacked his side before hopping away from both her and Steve with renewed energy. "Alright, alright, I'll get on it after we rebuild New York!"

Alice could only smile as she followed after the Avengers and for the first time in a long time she felt a sense of belonging and she decided, in that moment, to not think about the future for just a short while.


	8. Behind the Looking Glass

_As The Sky May Fall_   
_The Avengers_   
_08_

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**** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS THEMES OF SEXUAL ASSAULT AS WELL AS MENTIONS OF SUICIDE AND ATTEMPTS. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ****

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It was a two days after what the news channels were dubbing the Battle of New York – ("I haven't heard it called anything like that since the Revolutionary War," the mutant had mused much to the bemusement to the team of gathered heroes) – and Alice sighed as she walked beside the other Avengers in Central Park. Loki had been bound and gagged, being led by the arm by Thor who kept an even pace. All of them had gotten cleaned up and were dressed down in casual clothes to see the gods off and in the briefcase that Banner held was the Tesseract.

The day previous she had gone to a salon and had her hair cut and the short ends were pulled back into a stumped ponytail at the back of her head, wavy tendrils left to curl around her face and she felt good, fresh and it showed in her steps despite the slight limp she still held due to the wound on her side. Steve walked next to her, his eyes straying to her every now and again as if checking to see if she was still okay.

"You can stop looking at me like I'll disappear, y'know." She hummed with a small smile twitching at her full lips as she tucked her hands into the pockets of her leather jacket. "I still owe you coffee."

Steve's brow quirked, though his look was lighter than it had been as he offered her a smile in return, "Just making sure you're not gonna renege on our deal."

"I think we're all just making sure the Museum of Natural History gets their exhibits back in once piece…Got a call about them missing mannequins in both World War II and Revolutionary exhibits." Both turned to look at Tony who had made the joke before Steve shook his head and Alice flipped him the bird with a grin twitching at her lips, "Now I know why you were on threat watch, Wonderland."

"Can it Robocop," She snickered, "before I sic Pepper on you."

"You wouldn't dare!"

"She and I had plenty of time yesterday to become _very_ well acquainted."

"Is that why my account was charged damn near six hundred dollars at the salon alone?"

Alice shrugged with a smirk, "We have to help New York restart the economy again so consider it a charitable donation from the Stark fund…you should be able to write it off on your taxes." She laughed, "Besides, I can't thank you enough for the new phone." Tony grumbled as he turned away, engaging Bruce in conversation before Natasha sided up to the mutant.

"What's next for you?"

"Not too sure…probably fade into obscurity for a while. I was looking at old colonials and think I may buy one. For the sake of nostalgia and all that. " She shrugged with a small smile and ignoring the blatant stare she received from Steve as if he was waiting for her answer without trying to seem too obvious, "Planning on keeping tabs?"

"May stop by every now and then," She shrugged and earning a smile from the brunette, "If that's alright with you."

"Does that mean we're friends now, Romanoff?"

Natasha met her eyes and took in her expression. The one Alice wore was coy as if she knew them fighting together and watching each other's backs had helped them bond. She traced the soft angles of her face and noticed that any bad blood there had been between them initially had disappeared and Natasha wondered if Alice was the type to hold grudges, but when she met her hazel eyes she found nothing but honesty if a little teasing and she had her answer immediately. The expression was welcoming and one that had Natasha relaxing as she couldn't see a reason or motive for her to be dishonest. "Friends call me Nat."

"Alright then, Nat," She grinned, "And do friends also teach other friends how to kick ass?"

"It's negotiable," Natasha smirked, her eyes sparkling. "It won't be easy."

"That's just part of the fun right?"

The spy's smile only widened, "Just remember you said that...because I _will_ remind you every time you complain."

"Don't worry, I'm good for it," Alice smirked before waving her hand flippantly. "As soon as I have an address, you'll be the first to know."

"I look forward to it."

The group came to a stop in an open area just near the center of the park and they all turned as Thor nodded to Erik Selvig, who had been walking next to god for the length of their travel who held up the glass containment that the two gods would use to return to Asgard. Bruce opened the briefcase before passing the artifact over, and the cube changed hands once again to Thor who nodded, patting the scientist on the arm before looking at the remaining group.

"Thank you all."

It was simple and it was all he said before stepping back next to his brother and held the other end for him to take. The god snorted, holding the other end in resignation to his defeat before they watched as they disappeared with a twist of the device. The group then turned to each other as they returned to their vehicles; Natasha reaching into a S.H.I.E.L.D issued car and passing a dufflebag to Bruce who nodded at her as Tony and Steve shook hands. It had been spoken about last night about where everyone planned to go or what they planned to do next.

Bruce was going to be sticking to Stark Tower and New York for a while before moving on to some other backyard country in an effort to appease the two-ton mutant-like creature beneath his skin. He had jokingly mentioned Fiji and Tony had immediately offered to buy him an island much to the Doctor's chagrin and amusement. Bruce had expressed that he had wanted to keep in touch for the most part, however, and that had greatly lifted all of their spirits, but none so much as Natasha who had pretended to not look as interested. It had been something Alice had picked up on and filed away for later. Perhaps if she and the spy became closer they could discuss whatever reaction that had been.

Clint and Natasha were returning to S.H.I.E.L.D and receiving new assignments - Clint stating loudly that he was taking a _long_ vacation over the conference call with Fury and Maria and both had agreed with nods of both approval and understanding. Natasha's assignment was taking her to DC much to her amusement and Clint's chagrin and when he had tried to rebuke the redhead's location Fury had, in not so many words, told him that if he was so concerned he could jump immediately into the next mission. Clint had politely told the S.H.I.E.L.D director to bite him and that he wanted hazard compensation. When he was asked where he would be vacationing - again Tony offering one of the many islands he seemed to own - Clint had told him that he was heading back to his hometown and would make it up as he went along. It was all they were going to get and they didn't push further, especially when he threatened to shoot a rubber band at the billionaire for continuing to press.

Tony was putting full effort into creating the Stark Relief Foundation along with Pepper in an effort to help rebuild Midtown before beginning upgrades to what was once Stark Tower (stating that he was turning it into _Avengers Tower_ in the coming months since every other letter except the "A" had been knocked off the building during the battle with Loki). He had offered up rooms for each and every one of them - each Avenger coming up with different reasons not to stay, but thanking the man all the same. He hadn't taken it personally and had merely shrugged stating that the rooms and apartments were there if anyone wanted to use them and the group had all agreed to spend time at the tower after renovations were complete and earning perhaps the largest smile they had ever seen on the billionaire's face. That had left Alice and Steve.

Alice had merely shrugged and stated that she needed to eventually head back to Boston to check on her apartment. She had shrugged and snorted while stating that her job had probably fired her - something Fury had confirmed with what sounded like an apology in his tone, but the mutant couldn't be sure - and that she had wanted to take some time to get her head on straight. Her image had been shown battling aliens alongside of the Avengers and the news outlets had had a field day trying to come up with a name for her, Tony stepping in with PR quicker than Alice had been to stop him and calling her _Hellcat_. The billionaire had merely shrugged when she had questioned why he had chosen that name and she had resigned herself to it. Though, she had found out after he had leaked the name that it had been what textbooks had called her after World War II - The _Hellcat_ of the Western Front - apparently a moniker dubbed by none other than his father, Howard Stark, in an interview he had done after the war. She had nearly gone into cardiac arrest just yelling at the man who waved her away as if he had made a private joke at her expense - which was _exactly_ what he had done much to her chagrin. She had remained annoyed with him for no longer than a few hours before agreeing that the name was catchy and that they could keep it. Tony had never looked so pleased and she didn't have it in her ruin his fun, seeking revenge by convincing Pepper to take her to the salon and get her a new phone.

Steve had been quiet for the most part, but had only expressed interest in acquainting himself with the more modern setting he found himself in. He hadn't said whether or not he would continue working with S.H.I.E.L.D, but it almost appeared as if everyone was expecting him to. She wasn't sure he would but the patriot had looked so unsure under everyone's expectant stares that she had quickly turned the conversation back to needling the billionaire about fixing his suit so and ribbing Clint about his vacation plans that she missed when the patriot sent her a thankful look in return for the distraction as he escaped the table to use the restroom. He had remained silent for most of the night afterwards.

The exchanges were quiet between the gathered heroes - for the most part - and she found herself siding next to Barton and offering him a smile.

"I wanted to thank you," She began as she tucked her hands into her pockets and drawing the man's eyes to her. "I'm not sure I'd be standing here right now if it wasn't for you."

"Well," He smiled, "we all got demons to face, kid."

Her smile stretched, "We didn't get much time to talk..." When Barton's brow quirked at her she laughed, "I'm a two hundred year old mutant…trapped in the body of a twenty five year old. Remind me to tell you about it some time."

"Yeah…" He frowned at her, "I'm gonna need a vacation…a _long_ vacation. My world view has been skewered enough over the last few days to last me a lifetime." Alice threw her head back and laughed and when she regained control of herself she returned her gaze to the man to see he was studying her before handing her a small slip of paper. "That's a safe house…safest place I know. You ever need someone to talk to you'll know where to find me and maybe Tasha if she plans on stopping by." He then leaned closer to her so he could speak without being overheard, "My kids would love to have someone other than Nat to torture."

She grinned, "I'll certainly keep that in mind, Clint, and as soon as I have an address I'll make sure to send that along."

"I'll hold you to that!"

She waved him off before offering another wave to Bruce and Tony as they sped away in the billionaire's sports car and watching as everyone left. After a moment she turned to Steve before raising a brow at his Harley, apparently his love of motorcycles burned strong still. "Nostalgia?"

"Nostalgia," He nodded with a chuckle before gesturing for her to climb on. "C'mon I know a good place on the other side of the park where we can talk." She nodded and slid easily onto the bike behind him, holding the sides as he revved the engine to life and the two drove off.

Alice wasn't necessarily worried about what they would speak about and already had a good idea as to what topics would be brought up, but she couldn't deny the nerves she felt. And while she knew she was going to end up opening old wounds she also knew it was time to come clean with someone and who better than someone who had an idea of what it was like to be out of time. Steve pulled over and parked his motorcycle, allowing her to swing off of the back before securing the vehicle and following her as she moved in front of the small coffee shop that happened to be there.

"Ah, this is perfect," The mutant hummed as she took in the small store front. "I quite like this shop and try to come here whenever I'm in the city - which isn't often anymore, but it's quaint."

Steve swung his leg over the bike and stared at her and the shop before quirking a brow, "This is the coffee shop you like?"

"I _am_ a New Yorker, Steve, born and raised give or take a few decades...I just live in Boston now." She commented not without humor as she ushered him inside and shrugging, "I try to stay away from chains like Dunkin' Donuts and Starkbucks because of how packed they get. Besides, this place makes one of the best oat-milk lattes I've ever had and you don't have to sell a kidney to maintain the habit."

The patriot stared at her, trying to decide whether she was serious or not before stepping into the line with her. The mutant was much more relaxed than he thought she would be considering he knew - at least - a little bit of what she wanted to talk about. Tony had allowed (read: insisted) everyone to stay at Stark Tower the night previous so that they would be able to get everything set for the gods leaving that morning and Steve had made a point to check to see how Alice had been doing with the healing process. She had seemed fine, but had told him briefly about what she wanted to bring up during their talk - whether to allow him to decide if he wanted to hear her story or not, he couldn't tell, but he had simply agreed as his natural curiosity got the better of him. During World War II, she had always been suspicious to him and he had genuinely wondered at her intentions both within the military and with his best friend, but soon found she was genuine albeit secretive. She didn't want her business out in the open if she didn't feel comfortable with someone and he could respect that as he had similar feelings in regards to the super-soldier serum and his rapid growth and development. But she had told him that she would answer whatever questions he had and had told him that nothing was off-limits, something that had immediately kicked up a red flag for him, but he had immediately coached himself down.

He planned on going into this conversation with her with as much of an open mind as possible.

"You still take your coffee black or did you do that because of the service?"

Steve stared at her for a brief moment not realizing that they had moved through the short line so quickly, "Um mostly the service…i-it doesn't matter."

"I think it does..." She said drolly, "What would you like?" Steve looked over the menu before frowning, his lips pursing in thought and the mutant's brow arched in amusement. "Do you want to know what some of them are?"

"No...I recognize some...a cappuccino will be fine."

"Sure...one cappuccino coming right up," She chirped.

"You don't have to look so smug about it."

"Oh, you're not living this one down." She smirked before turning to the barista, "Could you add a pump of vanilla in that for me? I'm trying to help him broaden his horizons."

The barista blinked - a college aged kid clearly - and nodded after a moment, "Sure thing, miss."

"Thank you so much."

Steve frowned, "If I didn't know how you and Bucky could be friends before, I certainly can see why now."

She quirked a brow at him in barely contained amusement before speaking to the barista and ordering her coffee - waving him off when he tried to pay as she reminded him the coffees were on her - and motioning for him to continue through the queue. They were silent as the patriot looked around the shop and suddenly realized why Alice seemed to like it. It was small and didn't allow for much seating which kept people from loitering around and crowding, which also meant she wouldn't be taken notice of and the décor was light and airy with a few fake plants and picture frames hanging about to give it a homey feel. He realized suddenly why Alice had always seemed odd to him. Even when he had first met her she had avoided large crowds and he looked down at her curiously as she thanked the barista pleasantly and handed him one of the paper cups. She then gestured to the door and he took the hint and exited the shop, she then began walking towards the park where Steve took the lead and she followed him wordlessly.

"So," She began after a few moments of them walking side by side, "is this a place you discovered recently or an old haunt?"

"A little bit of both, honestly." He shrugged as he looked around, "When they thawed me out I didn't react as kindly to it as I think S.H.I.E.L.D was hoping and I kinda…ran into the middle of Times Square before Fury managed to catch up and explain everything to me. Hence the threat-watch, I guess."

"I'd wager they did so with about as much finesse as a squad of heavily armed men in a china shop." When he shot her a surprised, yet questioning look she hummed, "I'm surprised that you're so surprised. They didn't know whether you'd be a threat or not and I imagine that waking up to realize that things were suddenly different didn't help…warzone to sudden silence and all."

Steve regarded her for a moment before gesturing to a bench that overlooked an area of the park that many simply called The Lake and just beyond that was Strawberry Fields where both could see a ballgame being played. Alice sat, crossing her leg over the other and leaning back into the seat with a soft sigh as if thankful she wasn't walking anymore and he couldn't help but give her a once over.

She was dressed in light washed skinny jeans with large rips at the knees that were tucked into black combat boots as well as a dark grey women's henley under her cropped leather jacket that showed the expanse of bronzed skin that covered her chest tastefully, the neck of the henley loose and fitting more like a V-neck. Resting against her collarbones was a small necklace with a token he recognized hanging from a thin silver chain before taking in her features. She wore light makeup – something Steve remembered hearing her say at some point in the '40s was that she didn't like looking like a painted doll – merely a light dusting of blush to the apples of her dimpled cheeks and mascara to curl her dark lashes, her freckles standing out proudly against the bridge of her nose and spattering like daisies in a field across the tops of her cheeks. She was a simple beauty and one that he wasn't surprised had caught his best friend's attention back in the '40s – he had always been partial to brunettes, after all. His brow creased as he thought over her statement and he had to immediately remind himself that Alice had lived through decades of history that would have taught her how people were and how they could potentially react.

"Your side is still bothering you?"

Alice glanced at him and nodded, "It's more residual at this point and stopped being really cumbersome this morning. I wasn't kidding when I said it was a good thing I took that blast instead of you. It's certainly made my mutation kick into overtime." When he shot her another concerned look she waved him away before taking another sip of her oat-milk latte and sighing in contentment. "I can't say I've had worse to date, but I'll be alright…Bruce seemed to think so as well when he looked it over."

"So long as you're sure…"

When he trailed off Alice allowed her brow to arch in question before she blew a small sigh through her nose, "Even I can't be sure of everything, Steve…I may be ancient in comparison to you, but it doesn't make me much different."

"You're a lot smarter than you give yourself credit for," Steve frowned as he looked down at her, having yet to take a sip of his coffee and the mutant attributed that to his own preference since he had usually done the same during World War II. He was a social coffee drinker and tended to like when his wasn't scalding hot. "Not everyone can stomach holding the bandages…"

"And not everyone can stomach handling the bullets. I don't take credit for things that I don't think are true." Looking at him and the grimace that seemed to contort his features as if he was frustrated and didn't know how to convey the emotion into words she decided to acquiesce to his assessment, "But I suppose I could do to be a bit kinder to the opinions of others." When his face evened out he glanced at her again.

"Did I ever tell you that my mom was a nurse in a TB ward?"

Alice frowned before saying softly, "No, I don't believe we ever spoke about her."

"She was incredible," Steve smiled wistfully. "She was the strongest woman I ever knew and I told myself if I could have been half the person she was then I would be able to get through life with no problems. She always put others before herself and it didn't matter to her who you were or where you came from; she was always kind."

"Reminds me of someone I know," She replied with a small smile and earning a breathy laugh from the patriot. "For what it's worth…I think she would've been proud of you."

"Do you think so?"

"I know so." Alice said with a note of finality to her rough alto, "I'd be willing to bet that if she were here she'd tell you so herself."

The silence that stretched between them was not uncomfortable and Steve sighed softly as he recalled their previous line of conversation about his awakening. "I, um, actually woke up in what looked like a city I recognized," He took a sip of the coffee she had purchased for him, marveling at the flavor for a moment and returning to his story. "Last thing I remembered was crashing into the ocean and my cockpit filling with ice water before I passed out…then I'm walking up somewhere that seems familiar but the smell was wrong, the sounds were wrong, the woman who claimed to be a nurse was wrong." Alice watched him carefully as he played with the lip of the top of his coffee, the scowl on his face seemed misplaced and she frowned along with him. "Her hair was too long and down, the tie she wore was too large…a man's tie and she wouldn't be wearing Class A's to check on a patient…and her um… _brassiere_ …was wrong." He ignored the smirk that had begun to twitch at Alice's full lips when he cleared his throat, but she managed to keep her humor at bay as he continued. "They had a radio playing in that room I woke up…it was playing a Dodgers game from May 1941. They were playing the Phillies and it was a good game…seat gripping, really. But it was from a game I had been there to see in person with Bucky."

"They tried to desensitize you…acclimate you," She frowned as Steve's head snapped to her, "tried to introduce you to things slowly instead of telling you outright what had happened."

"Yes."

She nodded to herself, "I can understand why they would think that would be beneficial and I can't help but agreeing for once…you had come to grips with dying and knew as you drowned that you were dead by all rights. You would have written it all off and shut down, realistically, but perhaps they gave you those hints to slowly break the news to you – to gauge where your mind was or if what they said about you was true…you always were hypervigilant."

They were silent for a moment as they took in the people passing by, laughing or talking. Some were families, others were groups of friends that were coming together after witnessing the traumatic events of the last few days and some were couples, walking arm-in-arm and whispering sweet nothings as they passed. Steve couldn't argue the logic she presented and knowing what he did now, he couldn't help but agree. While he knew it pained her to admit that S.H.I.E.L.D had done something right for the most part by him, he wondered what would have happened had the situation been different. Would he truly have believed them if they said he had been frozen for nearly seventy years or would he have denied the entire thing and become a larger risk? The memories were still fresh in his mind and he couldn't help but feel grief wash over him once again at the thought of all he had lost.

"They also gave me their files..."

"The Commandos?"

"Yeah," He nodded after a moment. "Did you know Dugan and Jones were still alive?"

Alice smiled softly, "I did...I never reached out to them. They both had their own lives and mine after the war was complicated."

"Complicated?"

When she didn't answer he frowned softly, playing with his cup for a minute before raising his head to look at her, watching as her eyes followed each person almost as if she was reflecting on them.

"People's lives are so short," She began and the follow-up question he had been about to ask died in his throat at the almost bitter tone her soft alto had taken. "They're born, they live and make mistakes, some become successful and take that as their claim to life…Some manage fall in love and some waste the time they've been given by squandering it on things like materials where some build relationships and then they die and the whole process starts all over."

"But not you."

"No," She agreed as her eyes cut to him and Steve registered that she hadn't taken offense to his statement but seemed to consider something before she sighed. "I've watched for a long time hoping that one day I could do the same…When I was young, I often found myself wondering if I was being kept alive for a reason, given all the time in the world because I was given some divine purpose. I soon found that what I thought was a gift to be anything but – the curse of immortality." She paused as she gathered her thoughts. "Do you know how I found out I couldn't die?"

Steve shook his head, his brows pinching together. He would never ask, she knew and she found her heart warming for him. Steve Rogers was nothing if not righteous and thoughtful of those around him and he seemed to understand that people would talk in their own time and so he never pushed and that came from experience. Steve had been the underdog for so much of his life that it carried over when he had been injected with Erskine's serum. He was a good in this world that she had never thought possible, her opinion drastically changing from the last sixty years after losing both him and Bucky to time. No, she and Steve had not always gotten along and she doubted they always would, but they had been through too much together to not have respect for the other and the jobs or positions that the other had held.

Admittedly, the two of them had never particularly been close, but had become something like friends because of Bucky's influence and she owed it to his memory to repair the relationship with Steve. While he had never asked her – 1940's social norms be damned – she knew he would want her to look out for Steve as he was now and so she promised herself she would do whatever she had to in order to make that happen and knew that starting a friendship with the patriot was the first step and she planned to do that with complete and total honesty no matter how uncomfortable that made her.

"I was a spy in service of the Marquis de Lafayette at the time," She mused before giggling in amusement at the look on her companion's face. "Yes, despite being a known general in the Revolution at the time he ran a spy ring comprised of people all in different walks of life to track British movements within the Colonies and help our fragile Army."

"What walk were you on?"

"My father was Lord Sterling…or so he was called in some circles…Old Scottish heritage and all, my grandfather was involved with the Jacobite uprising and forewent his claim to the lordship in favor of escaping to the Colonies. I suppose my father wasn't entirely satisfied with that and reclaimed the title…I don't know much more about it since he never spoke about it to us. I wanted for nothing and money was never a question." She shrugged, "My father was a Major General and while not opposed to me aiding the revolution, did not want me to do so at the expense of my life…you see before the winter of 1778 I didn't have any idea what I was and neither did anyone else." Steve watched as she collected her thoughts before she continued. "You know, it was only recently that I began to hear people question the Bill of Rights and why the order is listed as such and make jokes about it and I understand their confusion…but at the time they were written it had been because of what happened during the revolution and were listed according to importance…starting with the very first things that were either taken away or forced upon us."

Steve watched the emotions play on her face, the almost playful and light look she had been wearing for most of the conversation darkened and the patriot braced himself mentally, knowing he was not going to like what he heard next. Alice hummed slightly in her thoughts before continuing, her eyes sweeping once more along the New Yorkers meandering through the park.

" _Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievance_." She quoted from memory, "The first amendment… _A well-regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed_ : second amendment and finally the third: _No Soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the Owner, nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law_. Back then I had lived in Boston…I had been rooming with a friend and her uncle while I was working with the Sons of Liberty for the mere convenience of being able to do my job effectively. Tensions had been rising almost too quickly in that city and it was a hotbed for the revolution…the Boston Massacre, the Tea Party…the British had been desperate to seize control as the Bostonians were the most vocal in regards to showing their discontent. Taking the city would be a blow to morale of the Continental Army that was already scraping the bottom of the barrel for literally everything…food, money, supplies and hope…" She drew off with a sigh as she fingered the cup in her hands. "I had been living in Boston for about three years when the house I lived in was seized and British troops took over our home. It was the middle of the night and I can still remember the smell in the air, the suffocating silence of that night…I remember the sound the front door had made when it had caved in and the sound of the boots as they hit the stairs. Emma - my friend at the time - and I were dragged from our beds and I remember being so terrified…Emma's sobs and the thunder in my ears from the shouting. They beat my friend's uncle – a war veteran from the French and Indian wars and disabled because of it – within an inch of his life and they threatened to hurt us if we dared do anything to stop them…"

She paused again as she forced back her memories of those days as violently as she could, but she knew speaking about them would allow her to heal and while she was not afraid of them any longer she did not want to relive those moments. After a few moments she frowned, ignoring the look on Steve's face as he listened to her without trying to rush her along. It was very different than the way he had been while they were dealing with the Tesseract and Alice didn't know which version of the man she preferred. As she took a sip of coffee to quench her dry throat, Steve spoke his tone wary as if he didn't know if he wanted to ask the question at all.

"What happened next?" She leaned forward, her legs spreading slightly as she rested her arms on her knees and allowing her hair to curtain her face from seeing the patriot directly. When her leg began bouncing in anxiety, a motion that did not go unnoticed to him, he frowned in concern, "Allie?"

"Haven't been called that in a long time," She passed him a forced smile and she knew it did little to reassure him when his face maintained the pained look. Unfortunately, she knew, history was not always tales of glory and righteousness. Gathering herself she continued, as she snorted on a dry laugh and returning her gaze to the ground as if trying to fully disassociate herself from the story and trauma, "I mouthed off…It wasn't exactly a secret that I opposed the crown and that my father was a successful Major General. I attacked them – or did my best to at least – and told my friend to run, hoping beyond anything else that they would focus on me and leave the others alone, but I was hilariously outmatched. I don't know if Emma ever managed to get far…they didn't exactly say nor do I remember the facts quite so clearly. They beat me and…" she drew off as they memories played before her of the violence she had experienced that day, "I was assaulted…multiple times and beaten again for my trouble if I so much as breathed wrong. I wasn't sure what was happening to me much after that, but I suddenly came to after they swung me into a shallow grave."

The silence echoed between them and Alice played with the paper cup in her hands, her eyes trained on the item as if it could help her solve all of the problems of the universe or open a portal to swallow her whole. Steve looked at her in something akin to horror before quickly averting his eyes as he thought over her story, his throat working against all of the questions that suddenly assaulted him. He had often heard about war atrocities and even read about them as a teenager and into his adulthood; he knew that it happened and that it was never something that should be looked at with any other tone but seriousness and care for the victim. He had seen more than his fair share during the war and remembered how Alice had stopped him and Bucky multiple times from intervening on behalf of women who were publicly shamed for being rumored to have slept with Nazis and he hadn't understood why even as she had taken care of the women afterward. But it shocked him. He knew the statistics and he knew the probability of it happening was more frequent than he liked to admit, but the last person he had ever thought of it happening to was Alice.

Despite being such a strong personality, Alice always seemed to have a very strong sense of self and never showed the signs of a victim of sexual assault or at least he couldn't remember a time when he had ever doubted. When he had first met her in the back of that caravan in Austria she had been stubborn and showed very little signs of fear as she back talked and verbally assaulted her captors even after Steve had taken them out. Even when she had been surrounded by men numbering four hundred, she hadn't flinched when any of them spoke to her or gave any indication that she had been afraid for her safety or flinching away whenever Bucky would touch her. All of that had been true, up until that very moment where he took in her form to see how small she had made herself, the anxiety showing in her posture as well as the bouncing of her knee that she seemed to not notice, but as he thought on it more he realized there had been one singular and blazing red flag he had missed.

Her fatalistic attitude and the easy way she seemed to talk about wanting to die.

Suddenly Steve cursed himself for not noticing sooner and he jumped when she cleared her throat, his thoughts apparently had been clearly expressed on his face and he flushed brightly as he wondered if he had said anything out loud without knowing.

Alice sighed softly, "I've had a long time to heal from that trauma, Steve." She assured him as a way of explanation before clearing her throat, "It's just…been a while since I've explained anything like this so candidly."

"You've…spoken about this before?"

"To Bucky," She nodded before offering him a weak smile. "I didn't tell him exactly everything that had happened as I am now as I'm sure you could imagine, but he needed to understand at least a bit of my reluctance towards his obvious advances." Her fingering of her necklace did not go unnoticed to the patriot as she continued with a faraway look to her eyes, "I couldn't explain that I was a mutant born in 1753 and that I was a woman out of place and time and that I was a primary source to early American war crimes." She shrugged suddenly, "And I certainly couldn't tell him that my aversion had nothing to do with my assault alone…"

"Because being a mutant during that time –"

"Would have landed me in Bedlam at best and at worst I would have been hunted or experimented on…take your pick."

Clearing his throat he thought over the next question carefully before frowning. "So, then what happened?"

Alice smiled at him ruefully, "When I woke up in that grave and looked up at the sky I wondered what I had done to God to anger him so much that I would be forced to relive those last few moments...to see those horrors every time I closed my eyes…I eventually picked myself up and marched back to that house. My plan, if nothing else, was to scare the shit out of the lobsters, but I did worse. I killed every single one of those sons of bitches with a smile on my face. We were a superstitious people back then and I'm almost ashamed to admit that I used that to my advantage. Afterwards I disappeared, ran to the frontier of Massachusetts and stayed away from people as much as I could allow. As far as anyone at that house was concerned, I was dead and I knew that if I magically appeared after those soldiers had loudly declared what they had done to Alice Elizabeth Alexander, daughter of hero Major General William Alexander and spy for the Continental Army that I'd be taken as some specter…" She laughed without humor as she gazed sadly as a family passed by, "I think about it sometimes…what my parents and siblings had thought when they received the news…they technically outlived us both. My father died of complicated health problems just before the end of the Revolution in part to his drinking…something I believe he took up after the news reached him on the frontlines and my mother threw herself into social circles as a way to distract herself…my siblings seemed to do okay, though…Will never married…I actually don't know what happened to him, but my sisters Mary and Catherine both married and had children so I suppose that made up for me not being around." She smiled wistfully as she considered her family. "Years passed and I silently watched from afar as my family died and friends I had known my entire life have children, grow old and die and I watched as our nation was born."

She took another sip of her coffee.

"You didn't try to reach out to them?"

"What would I have said?" Alice frowned softly, "They believed me dead and I knew I had to stay that way despite everything in my being that wanted to do the opposite. I can't tell you how many times I tried to before remembering what they had done to my name…those soldiers had announced it to anyone who had passed that they had killed _Alice Alexander_ …my fate was sealed the day they killed me."

"But Alice…"

"It wasn't a possibility. My family was in mourning and my coming back would have only made it worse…I didn't know what I was and I didn't know the first way to try and explain it without sounding certifiable."

Steve's gaze turned sympathetic as he watched the emotions battle on her features. He hadn't known that she had siblings and hearing her talk about them if only briefly he could tell that she had loved them and held them very dearly. Alice sighed softly as she pushed the memory of her family to the back of her mind, knowing that if she didn't continue her story in that moment then she would never finish and she cleared her throat.

"Around the year 1807, I believe, I met the man who would teach me that I was cursed." She continued on ignoring Steve's snort of disagreement – her flare for the dramatic seemingly taxing the patriot's emotional patience, "His name was Seamus Frasier – a Scottish immigrant that my father would have been so proud of being Scottish himself," She chuckled fondly at the memory and earning a soft look from the patriot. "He made me feel alive again for the first time since the day I died and I foolishly allowed myself to hope that this would be different. We married March 3rd, 1810…a longer engagement than most during that time and God I was so happy. For the first time I could say that I was no longer Alice Alexander or Elizabeth Wright and it felt like _freedom_. I was free." She breathed a smile as she sat back, comfortable enough with this memory to speak about it and Steve copied her stance as she did so, his posture relaxing slightly. "We tried for years to have young ones and no matter how hard we tried I couldn't carry…we attributed it to the trauma of my attack and I let him believe that. I knew much differently. It had been years since it had happened and my body bore proof that it wouldn't affect me physically in the long-term. Despite every baby we buried, Seamus's affections never waned and he never treated me differently."

Steve frowned, "Why would he…if he loved you?"

"Legacy was an important part of life for us back then," Alice answered with a sour expression. "Marrying a woman who was barren meant there were no heirs to carry on the family name and in most cases women like me would be tossed aside in favor of one more fertile. Women were property, nothing more and nothing less. I was not blind to this and I was never more thankful to have a man like him…he didn't look at me as if I was broken...like I was incapable or –"

"Useless?"

"Right. Our role back then was to serve our husbands and produce children that would carry on legacy, but Seamus never seemed to care for it."

"What was his trade?"

"He was a sailor," She smiled as her eyes brightened, "He was handsome and kind…I was immeasurably lucky."

"He sounds like he was a great man."

"He was," She nodded, "It was during the War of 1812...he was called on by his captain to try and aide the French by dropping them supplies as they fought the British. We had good trade agreements with them, but because of the conflict the British were capturing American ships and either killing the men aboard or shanghaiing them into service of the British navy to fight the French. Insult to injury for us beating them during the revolution I suppose. I can't tell you how long we stood on that dock saying our goodbyes…how many promises Seamus spoke to reassure me that he was coming home." She sighed softly, "I received letters for quite a long time before they suddenly stopped coming all together in 1814. It was months before I received word once more and it was by two men coming to my door and telling me that my husband had been killed. I broke. I entombed myself in our home with his memories and tortured myself with them. People stayed away from the house after they believed I'd gone mad and stories began to circulate…old wives tales…about how the house was haunted and to me it was, but not for the same reasons it kept others away. I tried everything… _everything_ to end my life and no matter how many bullets I put in my brain, how many times I stabbed myself in the heart, lit myself on fire or how many times I bled myself dry, I'd always wake back up surrounded by my own torment. I couldn't die."

A pregnant pause settled between them as they continued to watch people pass by. Despite being fairly recognizable no one stopped to spare them any looks and it was comforting and made both feel like they were normal. After another moment, Steve cleared his throat watching as Alice's gaze snapped towards him, the shadows that had been hanging about her seemingly disappearing for the brief moment and he almost relaxed.

"Alice…if you don't want to continue talking about this…you don't have to. You know that right?"

"I do."

"I don't want you to feel like I don't want to hear it. That's not what I mean…" He looked frustrated as he attempted to find the words, "I want to understand but I don't want to know if it's something you're uncomfortable talking about."

She offered him a genuinely disarming smile, one that made the patriot relax, "I know, Steve and that's why I think it's fair I talk about it. I've been in hiding for a long time, as you can imagine, and for the first time in my existence – despite knowing that for you it'll probably be short lived – I feel like there's someone who can understand…and I know you need this as much as I do – minus the parts where I tell you all the gruesome details." She commented with humor as she allowed him to chuckle, though she could tell it wasn't necessarily one that painted him as comfortable. "I'm not telling you this to make you feel like you owe me anything, but so that you understand when I tell you about Bucky and me. There are things I know _you_ noticed…idiosyncrasies that seemed suspicious at the time, but that you can understand now…we're not so different, Steve."

They were silent for another long while, watching as the sun began to creep along the sky and signaling that they had been there for quite some time and longer than Steve had anticipated. Their coffees were long forgotten and had gone cold, but still they played with the cups as if it was the only thing to really ground them to this moment. For a long time they hadn't trusted each other and despite fighting well during the invasion they knew that there were unanswered questions lying between the both of them, words that had festered for a long time in the mutant and were still fresh within the patriot's mind and if they didn't clear the air it would destroy them.

Alice craved connection and had starved herself of it for decades in an effort to protect herself and her secret. Steve was a man who had become great not just because of science; but a man who had gained much and lost even more and he was floundering with the whiplash of time. They needed each other despite their initial reluctance to save the other from drowning in an effort to save themselves.

"Do you want to know?" Steve looked up as her soft alto broke the silence between them, "About me and Bucky?"

She was giving him the control to decide where they went from there; if he wanted to continue learning about her or if he wanted to direct the conversation a different way and Steve didn't know what he wanted. She had left her story off in the early 1800s and with every event she told him about the less he was sure he wanted to know. Alice waited patiently as he decided. Of course, there were things she wanted to know about the patriot: how he had grown up, how he came to be the super-solider that he was when she met him as well as how he had put himself on the ice of his own volition. She wanted to know about his victories, his failures, his loves and his losses, but knew realistically that Steve was much more reserved than she when it came to speaking about the past. She had two hundred years to come to terms with her story and despite him being ninety three he appeared no older than twenty seven meaning he had nearly seventy years or so to come to terms with in his own story. Despite his age he still thought himself to be a young adult because that was the last thing he remembered being and was that person he saw when he looked in the mirror or saw pictures of his face both in and out of time.

"I do, _of course_ I do…but," he said after a long paused that had her turning her gaze to him in question before he chuckled breathily. "I wanna know how you do it…"

"Do what, Steve?"

He thought for a moment, trying to figure out a way to phrase his question. "How do you keep up with time? I mean a few weeks ago it was 1945 for me and now it's 2012." When he floundered for words Alice raised a hand to stop him.

"I understand what you mean. I find museums are the most helpful nowadays. During the earlier stages of history I found it easier to read in a library and then briefly integrate into society by watching and then participating for the appropriate amount of time before moving on and changing my name. In your case, however, museums will be the best tool and the internet is a fast way to answer questions that you have on the fly."

He frowned softly before glancing up at her from where she was sitting straight and he had leaned over, watching as she fingered the charm on her neck. "Did you love him?"

Alice turned to look at him once more, her brow quirking in question before briefly flickering down to where her hand clutched the charm, "Bucky?" When Steve's gaze hardened slightly she raised her hand to stop his ire, "Yes. I do love him."

The present tense did not miss his notice, "Still? Even now? After all this time and people that you've met you haven't moved on?" His voice was patient and not unkind in his line of questioning but it colored him with surprise and Alice immediately caught what he seemed to be asking her.

"You know there was a quote in a book I read once that described it so perfectly," She hummed as she attempted to recall the quote and ignoring the surprised look on Steve's features, " _I fell in love with him like I fell asleep…slowly and then all at once_. It was a long and drawn out struggle before he finally won out." She laughed softly before glancing up at him from behind the loose strands of her hair, "Is there someone you love, Steve?" When his eyes widened briefly she had her answer before his gaze snapped forward, avoiding her knowing stare and the muscle in his jaw clenched. "What's her name?"

"She's probably not around anymore anyway."

"But to you, she is." Alice said softly and earning Steve's gaze once more and he finally understood what she had meant when she had mentioned that they weren't so different.

Alice completely understood that for him he was still adjusting. Everyone around him wanted him to leave what he knew in the past and immediately acclimate to this new world around him and it was a lot for him to take in all at once. Not once did someone speak to him as if he was the Steve Rogers living in 1945 but the Steve Rogers who was thawed from ice and dropped into a world he didn't understand. She was not pitying him, he realized as he studied her face – the woman waiting patiently for him to speak – but she was speaking from a place of clear experience and he suddenly knew that it was because she had studied humans, watched them acclimate over time and grow, _evolve_. He felt the onset of emotion settling into his sinuses, the feeling rescinding when she stood up suddenly and offered him a small smile.

"You hungry?"

"I don't see how this has anything to do with –"

"Good, let's head to my place – that is, if S.H.I.E.L.D was kind enough to not lose my apartment in the meantime."

He scrambled after the woman his brows pinched in confusion, "What?"

"We're drawing a crowd," She remarked suddenly and out of the corner of her mouth to him and he looked around to see people were looking at them and whispering as if suddenly noticing them after the entire afternoon they had spent there. "If we leave now; we can shoot straight up 95 and end up in Boston before dinner turns into a midnight snack."

Steve couldn't help but follow her back to where his motorcycle was parked and even he had to admit that heading to a home sounded much better then heading back to a gym despite his traditional New Yorker rearing its ugly head at the thought of spending much time in his rival city, a thought he couldn't help but have in amusement. Shaking this thought he allowed the engine to turn over before jumping when he felt her arms circle his waist and he glanced back at her.

"I may be more in touch with modern society than you, but I still hate these damned things."

He found himself laughing as he pulled away from the curb and beginning to drive down the streets he loved so much before allowing her to direct him, unsure of where this small adventure would go.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** So his was all heavy and not at all pleasant. The next chapter is much along the same theme so I'll leave the warnings at the top of that chapter as well - originally it was supposed to be one complete chapter, but because of the sheer length of it, I had to break it into two parts so be warned...these two chapters are gonna be a bit lengthy! Next chapter will cover more trauma poor Alice has seen herself through and then it's officially TWS time ;) Just going forward I tend to buffer each movie with a few filler chapters so that we can add in some of the other characters and get their perspectives. I've already finished TWS chapters and am working on a few filler chapters now and I'm already promising a lot of little flashbacks both to the 1940s for Bucky and the 1700s for Alice's early life so definitely expect a few of those - I'm also open to suggestions here so feel free to drop them in a review, lol. I'm still working out what direction I want to take after CA:TWS and I have a few ideas, but I'm still playing around with that! I can absolutely promise a few chapters that are Bucky-centric - but if I gave away all the fun bits what would you have to look forward to?
> 
> Thank you everyone for sticking with me through these next few chapters! I'm genuinely excited for the next phase of this story and I really can' wait to see what you all think.
> 
> **Fun facts:**
> 
> \- The Marquis de Lafayette did run frequent spy operations in an effort to help mobilize troops for Washington along with help from Alexander Hamilton (who he tended to speak to exclusively since could speak fluent French and he had a hard time with English initially). One man who acted as a spy was a slave named James Armistead - after the war he freed him (Lafayette didn't like slavery so much that he and his wife bought an entire island of slaves, set them free and paid them just to live there) and James took his last name and so he's known as James Armistead Lafayette. Just a fun note: he had frequent sleepovers with John Laurens and Alexander Hamilton and considered George Washington as his long-lost father figure.
> 
> \- William Alexander was an actual Major General in the American Revolution and was married to Sarah Livingston.
> 
> \- While researching William Alexander, I found that he and Sarah Livingston apparently had a son named William Alexander Jr. and all records of him have been redacted and show him as never existing so it's unclear whether or not he made it through infancy.
> 
> \- Mary and Catherine Alexander (later marrying and becoming Mary Watts and Catherine Duer) survived early childhood and actually became successful socialites in Colonial society much like their mother and both lived until the 1820s.
> 
> \- Rape was an actual crime committed against Colonial women during British occupation as a way to demoralize the male household members and dehumanize the women (obviously). One such case was Abigail Palmer who was 13 years old when soldiers occupied her grandfather's farm in Pennington, New Jersey where she was basically tortured for three days by several men (this also included two friends and her aunt). According to historian Holger Hoock, author of Scars of Independence: America's Violent Birth: "Like most women raped by soldiers, Abigail had no chance to charge her assailants or seek justice in an American court. A few rape victims courageously visited the HQ of the occupying British forces to demand that their attackers be identified and tried. And at a time when tolerance of sexual violence was very high in the British army, officers did actually prosecute some rape cases: courts-martial sentenced several soldiers to execution by hanging. Abigail was in fact sought out by America's new leaders to tell her story. These men –– and they were all men, of course –– would deploy Abigail's story of personal suffering in their moral and propaganda war against the tyrannical British Empire". If you want to learn more about this or if you want to read the interview with him (there may be a video, I'm not sure) you can find it here:
> 
> [www.lennyletterstory/how-rape-was-used-as-a-weapon-during-the-revolutionary-war](http://www.lennyletterstory/how-rape-was-used-as-a-weapon-during-the-revolutionary-war)
> 
> Anyways, I hope you all enjoyed and I'll see you in the next chapter, bye bye! *Markiplier voice*
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	9. Fractured Remains

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Avengers_   
_09_

* * *

**** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS THEMES OF SEXUAL ASSAULT AS WELL AS MENTIONS OF SUICIDE AND ATTEMPTS. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ****

* * *

The drive up I-95 had surprisingly gone smoother than Alice or Steve thought and they entered the city of Boston no later than 7pm, which had surprised the mutant considering the interstate was well known to be one of the worst travel roads possible. Unfortunately, it was the only way into Boston that would bring them close to where her apartment was located.

Steve, by Alice's instructions, pulled into a parking garage with a series of numbers listed on the spots and he frowned as she directed him to continue up the levels. After a few moments she directed him to the number listed as 573 and she patted his shoulder as he parked. It took her a few moments to peel herself from the seat of the bike as the vibrations had been hell on her side and she frowned softly before swinging her leg over the seat and standing. Steve followed her after a moment before looking down at her in concern.

"Come off it, I'll be fine. I'm just stiff."

"If you say so," He remarked as if he didn't believe her and she chuckled before motioning he follow her as they made their way to the door leading into the building beyond after she had punched a code into the keypad that unlocked the garage door. She scanned what looked like an access card over another keypad for the elevator they stood in front of and when the pad turned green she pressed the button to summon it. After a few moments they stepped into the elevator and Steve watched as she hit the key for the 5th floor and glancing around him as the doors closed. The building they were in was surprisingly fancy despite what the outside had looked like and he had been surprised by the security – something Alice had merely stated it was to prevent people from randomly walking through the building if they weren't invited in and the patriot could see the logic. When they stepped out, Steve followed after her watching as she juggled keys he didn't know she had before stopping just in front of a door labeled 573 with her name written in neat scrawl on the mailbox next to the door.

Alice glanced at it for a moment, grabbing the envelopes inside before pushing open the door and stepping through, holding it for Steve as she did. When he stepped through she stepped away, shuffling through the notices as the patriot closed the door and looked around.

The apartment was well decorated with a series of books spread throughout the expanse in different places with plants and memorabilia throughout the different ages of history and ones he assumed were her personal belongings rather than the collectables of a history enthusiast. The living room had a cream sofa and matching loveseat adorned with pillows ranging in patterns and color and throws as well as a wicker chair that seemed to hang from a post in the corner with a large plant placed next to it. A oak wood stained coffee table sat in midst of the room and seemed to match the stand that the television sat. The wall on either side of the television was framed by two bookshelves and above the television was a shelf with the odd trinket and a mirror to help brighten the room. Picture frames that held mostly scenic shots were peppered throughout the room with the exception of four frames that held people in them and while he wanted to inspect closer he continued glancing around the apartment.

There was exposed brick that ran throughout the space and what plastered walls there were, were painted a soft sage green or taupe. The open concept led to a slight step up that divided the living room and kitchen where an island sat between two support beams with backed-bar stools pushed in – cluing him in to the fact that the kitchen was missing a table – and he could see that just beyond the kitchen was a small hallway that had four doors. The kitchen was painted an off-white with a subway tile backsplash that sat above the black marbled countertops and black cabinets. The floors with the exception of the kitchen were all a light hardwood and the kitchen tiled with woven jute rugs which were tossed on the floor both in the kitchen and living room.

It was cozy, he decided and very much Alice. Noticing she had wandered into the kitchen he took a moment to step further into the living room, glancing at picture frames as he passed before his eyes focused on the four with people in them.

He noticed the first had a group that he immediately recognized as the Howling Commandos a picture that had been taken from afar that showed the group preparing for a mission but all smiling – a mission he remembered distinctly as being successful – and he noticed, off to the side was her small silhouette as she watched. While she had not been formally picked for the Commandos, per Bucky's wishes, she was the one who was called in to patch them up after every mission her rank and expertise made her the obvious choice much to the man's chagrin. This was also because Colonel Phillips was still the commanding officer of the 107th and she was still a nurse serving that unit and the old Colonel had used the excuse that she would train Morita on emergency medicine while in the field. Her expression was fond if slightly cross as it appeared her attention was on Bucky who was grinning boyishly at her and Steve had been watching with what looked like amused exasperation. Dum Dum Dugan had been laughing, the sound echoing in his ears with memory, with Gabe Jones and James Montgomery Falsworth. Jim Morita and Dernier had been helping Alice move equipment it seemed as they were standing the closest to her and just behind. His eyes traced his old comrades for a moment before turning to the next frame.

This picture was of four women, all nurses he immediately recognized and wearing the field uniforms that consisted of heavy pants and shirts with the white band and Red Cross emblem attached to their upper arms. Each woman was wearing the uniform in a different fashion that gave way to their personal preferences and it left Steve with a smile as he gazed into the faces of the women who had no doubt taken care of many men and were enjoying a small reprieve. The women all appeared to have lighter hair than Alice and were laughing and joking it seemed and caught unaware that the photo was being taken.

The first woman was tall and thin with a swan-like neck and her light hair left to fall around her shoulders in gentle coils, her lips naked of the rouge he had always seen Peggy wear as she grinned over the mug of what Steve could only assume was coffee. The second was more voluptuous and shorter than the woman she seemed to be leaning on and was pictured with an open-mouthed laugh as if she had thrown her head back at a joke that had been told. Her hair was pin-curled and she wore a collared shirt tucked neatly into her pants, the neck of the shirt opened wide and showing her neck and skin of her chest and covering her bust just before it would be considered indecent, a style choice she seemed to share with Alice, though with the brunette it was less of a style choice and more of a way to keep herself from suffocating, he had remembered her saying. Alice had always hated the heat despite always being cold.

The third woman had her head on Alice's shoulder as she smiled widely at the other two women, her hands also circled around a mug that could only be coffee, her knees tucked up and to the side as she leaned. Her blonde hair was longer than the other two and was in a low ponytail pulled over her shoulder, the curls resting against her fully buttoned chest. Her eyes were alight with mischief, however, and Steve wondered who out of the group was the actual trouble maker. His eyes then traced Alice's straight form as she sat tall, a wicked grin tugging at her lips as she allowed the other woman to lean on her. She held her mug in her lap, hands circled around it and her feet crossed at the ankle. They were seated before an unlit fire pit on a series of crates and it looked as if it must have been the summer months as their shirts while being neat were darker at the fronts to show perspiration. He concluded that perhaps they had been enjoying each other's company after a shift and he replaced the picture for the next.

This frame held a picture of her and Bucky, and a quick glance at the last frame held the two of them as well as himself when they had had a brief leave in London just before Christmas and was the only frame that featured the three of them together and he smiled as he had the same picture in his own belongings. He then returned his attention to the frame in his hands and allowed his eyes to drink in the image and immediately put the time stamp in his mind that this image had been taken after he had rescued the four hundred men from the HYDRA base in Austria given his friend's state as well as that horrid sweater that Steve had found him in. The two of them were seated on grass, Bucky's leg closest to where she was kneeling was tucked closer to him and his other bent so he could rest his arm on it while the other rested on her knee and though the picture was not in color (as most film hadn't been at that time) he knew the color of his friend's eyes so vividly as they gazed fondly at the brunette seated next to him. The smile on his lips was his standard devil-may-care smirk and teasing grin in one but soft, the expression taking over his features despite some of the cuts on his face that it appeared Alice had been attending to in the photo.

Alice herself was kneeling next to his knee and wearing a collared shirt that looked dirty and stretched out as it exposed her collarbones and dirt-smudged skin that was tucked into her darker tactical pants, boots climbing up her shins to hold the pants in place. The sleeves were cuffed up to her elbows and showing her own array of scrapes as she tended his injuries. Her dark eyes danced back at the man in what Steve knew was a loving gesture, her expression pinched slightly as if he had said something inappropriate for the moment but her lips stretched into a cat-like smile that made her dimples appear. Her wavy hair was pulled away from her face in a bun that rested against her neck – a thing he knew from having seen her during that time period rather than what had been presented in the picture – with wild strands falling around her smooth jaw and heart-shaped face.

Around her neck was the necklace she still wore attached to a thin silver chain. The pendant was Bucky's lucky coin – an item that the man had always carried with him for as long as Steve had known him. It was a Mercury dime – a _Winged Liberty Head dime_ as some called it _–_ that Bucky had always said was lucky because he had found it after he had gotten into a rather nasty scrap. Dimes weren't rare, but for a poorer Brooklyn kid it was a fortune that seemed impossible to obtain and Bucky had never gotten rid of it and acted as a distraction whenever he had felt anxious. It was a coin that had been minted in late 1916 and was about 25 millimeters in height and 21 millimeters in length; on the front was a head of a woman with a winged helm, a braided coil around the circumference and the word _Liberty_ creating a halo around the figure's head. The back of the old coin depicted fasces which he remembered symbolized unity and strength, and an olive branch, signifying peace – something he knew from seeing the coin so many times over the years as opposed to seeing it on Alice's neck. At some point his friend must have been able to find a way to fuse it to the chain that Alice wore and given it to her as a token of his affection. Tangled slightly in the delicate chain were her own dog tags that had fallen out of the confines of her collared shirt, resting against her breast.

He allowed his eyes to trace the picture for a long while before jumping when he heard Alice clear her throat from behind him. "I – I'm sorry it's just –"

"Steve, my home is yours and you're welcome to look at anything in it." She smiled showing that she hadn't been offended before stepping next to him and looking at the frame he held in his hands in reverence. "This was always my favorite picture."

"I don't think I remember this…not exactly anyway. I know it was probably after we go back from that HYDRA base."

"You were called away for debrief after we returned to the 107th," She said with a confirming nod and smiling. "He turned down anyone else looking at him along with some of the others from the 107th. Waited the longest too when he kept telling me to make sure everyone else was settled first before him."

Steve snorted, "Weren't you called the Witch Doctor?"

"I kept our field hospital afloat by foraging for plants to substitute for medicines we were short on when we were pressed." She laughed as her eyes floated along the image almost lazily. "When I was transferred from the 71st to the 107th the rumors for what I had been able to do with plants followed. It made me a favorite when Cook's food didn't agree with them."

This was a conversation Steve could easily talk about and so it seemed easy for Alice as well as she looked up at him. "Cook?"

"Harry Beauchamp," She smirked as she stepped away and flopped on her loveseat, "Otherwise known by everyone as Cook. He was our…cook…anyway, he was a gruff ol' guy from Tennessee and he didn't particularly like anyone, but he and I got on well enough."

"Oh I'm sure," Steve laughed as he cradled the frame and sinking into the couch. "You're more agreeable than a nest of angry hornets."

"Bucky seemed to think so as well," She smiled. "Gave him a hell of a time about it too. Took Johana forever to even convince me to consider hearing him out."

His gaze flickered to the picture housing four women and he noticed her look soften once more.

"They were the nurses who were transferred to the 107th. We met briefly when we signed up for the Army and then each of us were assigned different regiments. When I got transferred and stepped out of that RV I had never been more excited to see those girls." She grinned as she gestured him to hand her the picture and when he did so, she cradled the frame gently before turning the image for him to see. "Fiona Douglas is the blonde on this end," She pointed to the first woman furthest left in the picture, "she was from San Francisco, California and was the best damn medic I'd ever seen." She then gestured to the second woman who was captured laughing animatedly, "Daphne Phillips was probably the most vivacious woman I've ever met in my life. She was a redhead who truly brought us all together and she was from Tacoma, Washington," She laughed before her gaze softened once more, "Johana Myles. She was a true Georgia peach and my shift-mate. You've her to thank for me giving Bucky even the closest thing to a shot." She tapped the picture. "Fiona and Daphne had teased me forever about it too."

"It sounds like you were all really close," Steve smiled.

"Yeah, we were." She sighed as she laid the picture on the coffee table between them. "They died when the 107th was attacked in Umbria."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"Not your fault," She sniffed and Steve frowned as he looked back down at the picture in his hands, his features softening once more.

"So, Johana's the reason you gave him a shot?"

"Yeah," She smiled. "He was a real piece of work about it too. I'll never forget the night he came strolling into the field tent and asked about the rumor of me being called the Witch Doctor like he hadn't heard it before." She leaned back and looked up at the ceiling with a soft smile tugging her lips. "Was so ready to defend my honor about it too and when I informed him that I didn't need a knight in shining armor he doubted me and I ripped him a new one for his trouble."

Steve laughed openly, the sound coming from his chest. "Sounds pretty spot on. I never knew how he did it." When Alice quirked a brow at him he smiled, "Talk to women."

"Yeah well thank goodness you didn't pick up much from him in that regard," Alice snorted in good humor. "I can assure you he didn't get away with it much."

"I don't doubt that at all," He smiled. "You two always did look good together…I didn't understand it when he first told me about you and then when I saw you two…it just seemed like you brought out the best in each other despite everything going on around us."

Alice's smile sobered as she considered his words before nodding, "He changed me. I had been so against loving anyone else, against allowing myself any type of pleasure in life especially after Seamus, but he seemed to understand that reluctance and work with it. He never pushed too much and let me go at my own pace…it was nice."

"Well he grew up with women despite liking to chase tail whenever he could and he knew how to respect a dame." Steve nodded, "There was nothing he wouldn't do for his sisters, his mom…or me."

"He told me a little bit about them," She nodded, "I think it was a way for him to appeal to me with a sweeter side when he realized big-boy bravado wasn't the way to go." She chuckled at the memory. "But in the end, he always was sweet."

Steve watched the emotions as they played openly on her face and he couldn't help the question from bubbling forth, "If it's not too much to ask…why didn't you ever move on from him?"

Alice considered the question for a moment, her fingers unknowingly tracing the charm at her neck as she thought. "It was different with him than it was with Seamus. There's a lot of things I don't believe in this world, but I can't help but feel as if he was my soul's match. And I _know_ how that sounds, you don't have to say anything, but in all the years I have been alive and no matter how many people I have interacted with throughout the years _no one_ made me stop, made me _feel_." She sighed, running a hand through her hair that Steve just realized was pulled out of the ponytail she had it in all day, the ends falling around her neck and sitting just above her shoulders. "It sounds stupid and it _is_ stupid…God, I'm talking about my sweetheart to his best friend like I'm a sixteen year old at a slumber party."

"I don't mind," The patriot smiled softly.

"Oh goodie, maybe we can braid each other's hair and sneak into mom and dad's liquor cabinet when they go to bed." It took Steve a moment to realize she was joking as she stood up and offered him a teasing grin. "You hungry?"

"I could eat."

"Pizza sound good?"

"It's not New York."

"No, but I've found a few decent places around here that make one that's _just_ tolerable."

Steve laughed before replacing the picture frame he had been cradling on the end table before following her into the kitchen. Just as she was dialing the number she gestured for him to follow her and he did as she made her way down the hall and pushing open a door. He noticed the bedroom for what it was. It was decorated neutrally with a plush looking bedspread that was a rich cream color and matching accessories, the room painted a soft dolphin gray with black accents. The bed itself appeared to be full sized and was pushed underneath the two curtained windows in the room and had a nightstand and lamps on either side. A dresser sat pushed against the wall opposite the bed with a mirror hanging against the wall and a closet to the right of the room. On the opposite wall and to the right of the bed was another two windows with a small writing desk tucked underneath. He then glanced back at the bed to noticed the clothes that were folded on the edge.

"Those clothes are my old partner's from EMS. He's around your size so they should fit and then put your clothes in the hamper, I'll run them tomorrow until you manage to get yourself a few new digs. You're welcome to stay as long as you'd like." She shot him a knowing look that stated she knew he had been in a safe house and that she wouldn't tolerate him living under what was assumed to be S.H.I.E.L.D's thumb as she turned, "Yeah, hi I'd like to place an order for a large cheese pizza…" As she walked away he turned back to the room before stepping into it.

While it was neutral, Alice had clearly taken the time to make it comfortable and livable. Glancing at the dresser he noticed folded towels, which he assumed the brunette had left out for him while he had been nosing around her living room and he smiled, grabbing them as well as the sweats and stepping back into the hallway. He noticed the door just slightly left of the door across from him was ajar and he could see the bathroom just beyond and he knocked before stepping in and closing the door.

Alice hung up the phone and glanced down the hall when she heard the shower turn on and smiled to herself before stepping back into her living room and looking over the photo of her and Bucky, her mind immediately recalling the memory and she stroked the glass gently as she allowed herself to remember that day.

**-0-**

**November 1943**

"Alley Cat, I told you I'm fine!" Bucky snorted as he waved off her attempts to take a look at him and smirking at the glare she sent him in reply. "Seriously, take care of these guys first. I'll wait right here for you."

She gave him another once over before eyeing him sternly, "You better stay right there until I get back, Sergeant. You've avoided me long enough over the last few days."

"Yes ma'am!" He saluted the boyish grin she had come to love so much tugging at his lips. He watched as she hurried away answering someone just out of sight who had called to her and yelling back that she was coming as she brushed her hair out of her face with an elbow. He blinked when he heard a whistle and sighed as Dum Dum stepped up next to him.

"About time." The Bostonian commented as he looked to where the petite nurse had run off to, "I was thinking you two would never get together…The Hellcat of the Western front and her Tom...guess that stupid nickname you gave her really does make sense now don't it?"

"When she decides it does, yeah," The man laughed before grunting when the larger man clapped him on the back.

"The Witch Doctor…"

"Yeah…lives up to that one in more than one way, too."

Dum Dum laughed again as he stuck a cigarette in his mouth, offering one to Bucky who shook his head with a smile and earning a shrug as the man lit the end. "She's a pistol. Half the guys around here are either scared of her or bewitched by her." He hummed.

Bucky's brow quirked at the man, feeling the heat creep up his neck at his friend's comment. That much had been true. Nurse Alexander was not an unattractive woman and many men spoke about her in their foxholes along with the names of the other nurses who had come to be a part of the 107th, something he still found irritating, but knew enough not to bring too much attention to. He looked back to see that Dum Dum, while not worried about the man's silence, seemed to be waiting patiently for him to comment. "Without Johana's help I doubt Alice woulda even given me a second glance."

"I don't know Barnes; she seems to like you well enough without anyone's help."

Bucky snorted on a laugh, the sound even sounding forced to his ears, "Had to go through hell for it too."

"That's women for ya." Dum Dum laughed before glancing around the camp and smacking the thinner man in the chest with the back of his hand and nodding his head to one of the other nurses, "Speakin' of...if you'll excuse me, I see a sweet little number who looks like she could use a little company."

"Go get 'er."

The strawberry blonde man gave a hearty chuckle and a half-hearted solute before jogging away from him and Bucky sighed before sinking to the grass beneath his feet and waiting for the brunette spitfire to return. He hadn't expected for her to be at that base and least of all with Steve. When they had been attacked in Azzano he and the others had watched as their field hospital had been blown apart by enemy fire and he had thought the worst. He had found out from Steve that he had found her captive in the back of a caravan that he had just happened to use to break into the base and he shook his head. Alice had been the only one of the nurses to survive from what they had been told and the brunette seemed to be carrying this weight heavily as he watched her small frame flicker into view as she was working with another nurse.

Alice looked stressed, the emotion misplaced on her pretty features as she worked on each man with quick and practiced movements and instructing the other nurse on what she was doing. Since they had broken out of the Austrian HYDRA base, thanks to Steve, the woman hadn't stopped and he couldn't remember the last time she had slept with the exception of when he had forced her to upon Morita informing her that he could keep the men who she deemed critical alive for a few hours. She had looked worse than hell, her hair matted in places from her dirge through the woods of Austria in what could have only been her escape. She had barely spoken about it, only mentioning that Harrow had given her enough time to get away after they had both escaped, but he clearly hadn't made it. Bucky knew not to ask because if he demanded answers from her, she sure as the sun in the morning wouldn't have hesitated to demand answers from him and he wasn't ready to speak about what he went through just yet. _If ever_ , he thought to himself drolly. No, if he could avoid speaking about it, he would. No one needed to question him further when all he wanted to do was forget the entire thing had happened - the irony not lost on him when he realized that was _exactly_ what they had been trying to do if that tiny, creep of a doctor had explained it correctly to him, despite his utter lack of interest. It had been hard for him just to remember what they taught them to do in basic. Deciding that he needed a distraction from his sputtering thoughts, his eyes traced the site before catching Alice's fluttering form once more and he allowed his gaze to follow her as she worked and he couldn't help the small smile that crossed his face as he did. He didn't have to wait much longer as she nodded to another nurse, gesturing in his direction and receiving a nod in reply before she jogged up to him and sighed.

"I will never again complain about the help that is too helpful ever again."

Bucky chuckled, making room for her next to him as she flipped a bottle over a rag before putting the cap back on it and setting it aside, scooching close to him on her knees and dabbing the cut on his cheek. He winced slightly before he watched her, her eyes focused as she worked with practiced movements. "Nah, never complain about the help, the help's the one who's gonna nag you until you're better."

The two of them briefly heard a camera go off beyond them and he glanced up to see a man already moving on from taking their picture and he grumbled under his breath, finding the USO convoy to be irritating and completely unnecessary. Alice, however, didn't seem to mind as she continued checking him over.

"Captain Rogers said he found you strapped to a table," She began tentatively and he picked up on the tone immediately before glancing back at her and offering her a forced smile.

"Captain Rogers needs to keep his trap shut," When she shot him another look he sighed. "They didn't get to doin' anything to me just yet. Don't you worry your pretty head over it." When she glared at him he smirked, poking her thigh and watching as her face broke fractionally before doing it again, "Fix your face, Doll, otherwise it'll stay like that and then I'll have to explain to people why I'm with a witch."

"You're hilarious...really," She drawled dryly after she released an unattractive snort and he cried out with a glare when she pressed a little too tightly on the cut on his cheek. "Oh dear, I'm _so_ sorry."

"No you're not," He grumbled, though his mood was still playful, as he pouted. "You're the reason why kids are scared to go to the doctor because the nurses are mean."

"I'm also the nurse who helped drag your ass out of a compound." She smirked at him before cupping his chin and turning his head this way and that as if inspecting his face for further injuries or demarcations, her eyes tracing around his eyes and forehead. "Anything else bothering you?"

"Right here," He said as he grasped his heart, "my girl is being oh so mean to me."

"Is that so?"

"Oh yeah, you see she's this big bad war nurse and she likes to make people think she's meaner than she is. Won't even dance with me when I ask." He jibed at her with sarcasm, his face conveying his humor easily enough.

Alice threw her head back and laughed, her hand not leaving his face and ignoring the tingling sensation that radiated throughout her from where Bucky's hand rested on her knee. It was not a feeling that she had ever experienced before and it seemed to appear whenever the man was near her and whenever he wasn't near she felt it in the pit of her soul. Before the Battle of Azzano, Alice hadn't known what she truly felt for the Brooklyn-native, but had been thoroughly surprised when he had presented her with the mercury dime on a chain, admittedly his only piece of home and his good-luck charm. She had tried to deny the gift, but he had told her he would've been offended if she hadn't taken it before he had been called away as they were told to move out. It was as he had walked away from her, tossing her a boyish grin over his shoulder that she realized that she loved him. She had decided to tell him after the battle, but that had never happened as HYDRA had interfered with the battle and took everyone that hadn't fallen back fast enough hostage. Now, the words didn't seem to want to come out, but looking over his handsome features: blue eyes like slate silver plates teasing and questioning all at once, the defined slope to his currently stubbled jaw, full lips that were chapped and cracked in certain places from the rough conditions he had been placed under nearly a month and a half ago and his cheekbones that sharpened the angles of his face. His dark hair - still regulation she noted with surprise - was unwashed and clung to his head with sweat and dirt and seemed mussed as if he had ran his hands through the strands recently, but his eyes were what genuinely captured her every single time. Even bruised and beaten no one could say that James Buchanan Barnes wasn't a handsome man and he had stubbornly chosen _her._

Leaning forward conspiratorially she stopped just before their lips touched, "Well I'm sure you'd make a great dance partner, sure you don't wanna skip town with a gal like me, Champ?"

"Now, Nurse, what respectable fella would I be if I just up and left a woman like that?" He returned laughingly as his eyes searched hers, "Besides, she's got this real sweet side that she doesn't like people knowin' about." He leaned forward and captured her lips with his, relishing as her lips pressed back into his. It wasn't their first kiss, but this one tasted sweeter than any other they had shared and neither seemed worried about being caught at that moment.

Alice breathed into the kiss, her nerves singing as her hand released his chin to slide along his cheek. In the back of her mind she knew this was not going to last. Even if he did survive the war he would age and she would not – she would outlive him and have to break both of their hearts in the process. She ignored that thought as she enjoyed the moment, savoring it as if it was their last.

**-0-**

"Hey."

Alice jumped, having not heard Steve exit the bathroom or apparently not heard her phone for the pizza as he stood in front of her with a box and an awkward smile on his face. "Oh, I'm sorry Steve!"

"It's alright," He waved her off. "Took me a few minutes to find the lobby, but managed just fine once I found the elevator." He watched as she returned the frame gently to its former place, her fingers tracing it in reverence before his eyes flickered to her face, "That look is familiar."

"Um…just remembering," she frowned, helping herself to a slice of pizza and shoving it into her mouth to give herself a moment to recollect herself and to not explain herself further. Steve took the hint and let it drop as he bit into his own slice. It wasn't New York pizza, but she hadn't been wrong when she said it was tolerable. "I'm sorry I was so out of it…"

"Well I just hope you don't mind that I answered your phone," He countered before offering her a knowing smile. "I think we can call ourselves square."

"Maybe," She nodded before offering him a smile. "So…what was she like?"

Steve swallowed his bite before looking at her and studying her expression for a moment, "And what brought this up?"

"I thought this was a sleepover?" She smirked before her face fell into a softer one, "You started to tell me about her at Central Park and I didn't give you a chance to finish before I spirited you away. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, you know."

Steve was silent for a few moments before nodding around another bite of dough, "Peggy was unlike any other woman I had ever met. She was sharp, tenacious and beautiful, but there was a kindness to her that she only allowed you to see if you deserved it. She taught me quite a lot, actually." He took a sip of soda that had come with the pizza Alice had ordered before clearing his throat. "I'm actually surprised you didn't meet her, being stationed at the 107th."

"I was in a caravan upon capture, remember?"

Steve thought on that after a moment, "Even after. She was there the day we got back…part of the SSR." At her blank look Steve sighed, "Anyway she was the one who helped me get over enemy lines to save the 107th."

"She sounds lovely," Alice smiled softly at him and watched as his neck flushed. The two continued to eat, speaking about nothing in particular as they did.

Alice would not push Steve into talking and it was clear that Peggy was a still aching wound he was not ready to let go of just yet. They spoke about what had happened after he had gone down in 1945 and the end of the war. During that time he asked her questions about different things he had briefly come to learn about over the last few weeks and the two fell into an easy companionship. Alice would ask him questions about his time growing up and about what his likes and dislikes were, finding that they both had a deep appreciation for art and literature in common and it was then she learned that he had never had an ice pop.

"You're joking!"

"No," Steve laughed as he pulled another slice out of the box between them. "The lines at Coney Island for them were ridiculous and there was no way I was waiting for one…besides Bucky and I always had to make sure we had money to get back to Brooklyn."

"I thought you were going to make a joke about you being on ice," She snickered, "missed opportunity for a next level pun, Cap."

"You're hilarious."

"I know it's why everyone likes me so much. I'm likeable!"

"Yeah like a cactus."

She threw her head back and laughed before taking another bite of pizza and smiling. "Who knew you had a sense of humor…the guy I was reintroduced to a week ago would scoff and tell me to follow orders."

"That guy coulda dealt with a swift kick, huh?"

Alice's brows shot up in disbelief, "You said it not me. If it's any comfort at all I wasn't sure what to think when they told me that you'd been recruited…"

"I wasn't sure what to think when they told me you had to be captured."

"Touché…"

Steve watched as she shrugged before a look of indifference settled onto her features. " _Why_ did they have to bring you in by force?" He immediately saw the reluctance on her face as her jaw clenched and her lips thinned, her brows furrowing over her now cinnamon colored eyes as her gaze darkened. He hadn't realized this was a topic so precarious and he hadn't meant to bring the atmosphere to a sudden stop, but he had been curious.

"You sure you want to know, Steve?"

"If you're willing to talk about it…" He drew off as if second guessing the thought himself, "then I want to hear it from you. I never knew you to be someone who thought about violence first. When I knew you, you always seemed to find reason in a situation and I admired you for it…I just don't understand why."

She had since abandoned her slice of pizza and wiped her hands on her napkin, her gaze set away from him as she settled back in her chair. It took her a few moments, but when her eyes finally met his he found himself unable to look away from the tortured look.

"After Bucky's death and then yours I finished out my service in the Army until the end of the war. I helped Howard briefly when he managed to find the Tesseract and after giving him my advice I retired and fell back into obscurity. I was living in relative peace until a thesis was published…around 1962 by a Charles Xavier who had discovered what he was dubbing the X-gene. It was a theory that those who had this genetic mutation carried within their DNA, a gene that gave them special abilities which would explain anything that was out of what the population would consider normal – _human_. It was a thesis that seemed to explain super-humans with an array of different abilities…"

Steve quickly connected the dots, "It would explain what you were."

"I finally had a name," She nodded, though her expression remained stormy, " _Mutant_. One containing a genetic mutation that made them _incredible_. Suddenly it seemed that these people… _mutants_ were coming forward to show that they were just like everyone else. But humans have never changed in the two hundred years I've been among them." Her jaw clenched tightly, the muscle working as she seemed to grind her teeth together. "Fear's a powerful motivator. People from two different camps emerged: one said that mutants should be awarded the same human decency as everyone else; to prove whether they were a danger to themselves or others and the second claimed fear as its weapon. For every good thing said there were five counter arguments that said that mutants were bad, that they should be feared among all others in this world because how can you be assured that the mutants wouldn't try to overpower their neighbors? America was scared as we were once again faced with a war that seemed like it was on two fronts. One was internal – a mutant crisis that turned neighbors on each other – and the other was foreign…Communist parties were rising across the Asian continent starting in Russia and working throughout and it was a race to the button. They called it the Cold War."

Steve had since abandoned his pizza as he watched where she reclined in the stool, her posture tense as a spring – ready to bolt – and he couldn't blame her, yet it made him curious. How was it that she had told him about horrific things already in her past with relative ease, yet this seemed worse? Could it have been that it was more recent, fresher within her memory? Or perhaps it was that she had finally had a name to give what she was, yet was terrified of it even as she sat across from him no more a danger to him than herself? He watched as her eyes finally met his and the severity on her face looked so out of place and he was once again reminded of her age for the look was jaded and it looked as if she was trying to contain a storm in a glass bottle.

"The next part of this story, Steve, is something I'm not proud of and it _will_ change your view of me." She paused watching his expressions carefully, "Are you sure you want to know?"

Her words were heavy with the certainty of the promise and the patriot knew that after this there was no turning back for them and he nodded. He wanted to know what made her hate S.H.I.E.L.D; to be so reluctant to help them that it changed her so entirely from the person he had looked to for guidance after his friend had died and while she had been broken during that time she had carried on much better than he had, or so it had seemed at the time especially when he had targeted her with his anger and loss.

Alice was a constant in the sea of change for him and she was the one thing that he knew would bridge him between his old life and the circumstance of this new world and he needed her to help him navigate. While it sounded scarily dependent, Steve knew that there was no one better than Alice to help him bridge the gap and continue moving forward. He told himself, in that moment, with as much conviction as he could possibly muster that whatever she was about to tell him would not change the way he viewed her. With the thought repeating like a mantra in his mind he nodded and watched as the tension seemed to only double for her as she continued.

"I stayed to myself as much as possible, changed my name again and allowed Alice Alexander to die. I was Eliza Jenkins at the time and dogs had finally managed to catch my scent. I was followed constantly, being watched carefully. I was still mourning and wasn't as careful as I normally am…I tripped up and that's when I was captured. I didn't know their name at the time, but later found out that I had traced back to 1945 by blood records I hadn't thought anything of at the time they were taken and it allowed Department K to find me. They assured me that after a simple blood test I would be released and let them, figuring the less I fought and the more I complied the faster the nightmare would be over…a naiveté I told myself I will never have again. I was locked in a room and it's when I stopped being Alice Alexander all over again…Instead I was known as _subject 87563_ and I have the mark to remind me. Next thing I know I was being dragged into a lab where they poked and prodded me, trying to figure out how my mutation worked and what made me tic." She scowled, "I won't go into detail about _how_ they tested my mutation or _what_ they did, but it was the first time I met Rick Stoner. You see, Steve, he was the one that had been assigned my case and it was him who brought me in and assured me that everything would be fine. It wasn't. And worst of all...he was _S.H.I.E.L.D._ "

Steve remained motionless, afraid if he breathed wrong it would break the steadily growing tension surrounding them. If Alice noticed, she didn't comment.

"Days went by…weeks…months…I lost track after a while and every day it got worse and worse and every day I got angrier and angrier and I swore, if I ever managed to get out, I would kill them. Every last man and woman in that lab I was going to kill and feel no remorse for it." She breathed, ignoring the look on Steve's face as she spoke knowing that if she looked up and saw the look he wore on his handsome features she would feel bad for what she was about to tell him. "I was introduced to Fury in 1981 who acted as my handler. He had been escorting me to my cell when he had been called away…I don't know for what but I assume it was spy business and he looked remorseful at the time, but I didn't care. I had told myself that it didn't matter if they were innocent or not, if they got in the way of my freedom they wouldn't live long enough to regret it. I finally got my chance that day after I saw him back in that lab as I was being ripped apart," She snorted as if the memory was lighter than she was explaining it to be, "My cage had magically not engaged the lock and I was out and I wanted blood. I wish I could say that in the moment I would finally have my vengeance that I was merciful to whoever was not directly involved, but I wasn't. I killed every single person I came into contact with from the scientists who had laughed over mugs of coffee that morning to the secretary that would stare at the picture of her family on her desk in the main lobby. I hunted them all. I didn't care. If they wanted a monster, I was going to be the monster that would make them remember how insignificant they were. After I had been satisfied I ran…went underground but it didn't stop Fury from finding me."

He clenched his hand into a fist as anger surged within him for the woman sitting across from him. How much was too much for one person to endure?

"I've never been a close range fighter, never had enough strength to do any significant damage and the moves Bucky taught me were more for my defense than to subdue an attacker and it didn't take long for Fury to subdue me…at least until I stabbed him as a means of self-preservation and held a gun to his head, but something told me not to pull the trigger. I was tired and I was weak…I hadn't eaten in what felt like weeks and I certainly didn't have the energy to go another round and Fury seemed to know that too. He promised me that my file had been destroyed that I was in the wind, that if I wanted to be Alice Alexander again I was more than welcome to and he would do nothing about it. I never trusted him but he showed me the file and lit it on fire, not before backing those records up on a computer I imagine because I was able to find my file years later after learning how to hack. After breaking into S.H.I.E.L.D's encrypted program I painted a target on myself again…that was four years ago and last week they managed to find me…sent Nat after me and brought me in. The rest you know…and here we are." She played with the end of the paper plate in front of her to avoid looking at Steve, "That's the truth of everything up until now…It would be foolish of me to think you still want someone like me around, but know that what I felt for you and Bucky hasn't changed…I was so sure they were lying when they told me you were helping with the Tesseract, so sure it was a ploy in an effort to make me do what they wanted…but I'm happy I was wrong."

It seemed impossible but Steve finally seemed able to remove the nail from his tongue as he spoke, voice sounding almost broken, "How long…?"

"Twenty years…give or take."

He almost blanched as he looked at the woman across the table who was studiously avoiding looking in his direction.

"Your fear of needles," Steve's choked voice sounded so loud in the room that had fallen into a tense silence for long minutes, the tenor spoken slowly as if he was choosing his words with the utmost care and Alice glanced up at him to see that the look on his face was unreadable. "The wanting to die…it's recent." She shrugged noncommittally and it gave the patriot his answer. The memory of her being sexually assaulted wasn't just from 1778, but from the 1960s and for perhaps the twenty years in between when she had first gone in and when she came back out and Steve suddenly wanted to be sick.

She had had time to come to terms with what had happened to her all those decades ago, but – he assumed – the way her mind worked was that even if something happened ten or fifteen years ago it felt much shorter to her than that so it would make what happened two hundred years ago seem more distant not just because it literally was, but because time blurred. His mind recalled the way she had spoken a little more candidly about what had happened to her during the Revolutionary War, but she avoided saying what happened altogether during her time as an experiment.

He had remembered reading something when he was a teenager about someone immortal and it had said that days seemed as seconds and weeks like days. Time worked differently when it was all you seemed to have and Steve only had a brief understanding of it because of his own situation of circumstance. His eyes fluttered back to her form when she shifted slightly and he could see the tension in her shoulders, her knee bouncing in anxiety once more, but her face was taut as if contemplating her fight or flight response and he found himself pitying her. He knew if he voiced anything in that moment that she would resent him, but he couldn't help the feeling of lead balling in the pit of his stomach.

Her eyes slammed closed when he shifted and he immediately knew he needed to proceed with caution, not for himself – he doubted she would ever do anything to actually hurt him – but for her. It took him a moment to work his way around to the other side of the island before he stopped next to her and gently reached out, stopping just before his hand would make contact with her shoulder and waiting before allowing his large hand to rest on the appendage. It took him a moment to decipher her body language, but when she didn't immediately throw his hand off or move away he slowly allowed his hand to pass behind her before encircling her shoulder. He had never been good with contact like this from his own lack of experience, but he had hugged his mom enough times to know how it worked as he slowly worked his way into the position before waiting. He left her room so that if she wanted to break away from him she could as his arm rested across her shoulders and her shoulder resting against his side.

"Allie…" He noticed the tears trailing her cheeks and sucked in a breath as she turned suddenly, her face slamming against his chest and her arms thrown around him. He allowed his other arm to come around as he held her, slowly rocking as the woman began sobbing and he didn't know what to say to make it better so he held her as he thought of the right words. "It's not your fault, Alley Cat…it's not. None of it is your fault."

"I'm a monster," Came the muffled sob from his chest as she shuddered against him. He squeezed her to him, careful of his own strength as he was reminded how small she was once again. "Why…?"

He didn't answer as she began babbling incoherently between each sob that wracked her thin frame. After a moment, keeping his hold of her, he directed her to the living room and she allowed herself to be led before he sat her on the couch and pulled her back into him as he sat himself down, allowing her to cry and only offering words of encouragement when he managed to make out any of her self-deprecating comments. After a while, Alice seemed to be calming down and she gently pulled away from the blonde wiping her red face and seemingly trying to hide from him.

"I'm sorry," She mumbled after a few moments before heaving a watery laugh, "I've gotten your new shirt all full of snot! This isn't what I wanted at all when I told you I'd tell you everything…just…"

Steve rubbed her shoulder and shook his head, "Allie…look at me." When she did from puffy and swollen eyes he made sure to punctuate his words with as much strength and conviction as he could, "Nothing that happened to you was your fault. You didn't deserve what's happened then and you certainly don't deserve it now. Would I have done the same thing in your position? I don't know, but what I do know is you're still the strongest woman I've ever met and I have no intentions of going anywhere. Not because you were my best friend's girl, but because you don't deserve to go through anymore of this alone." He watched as she sniffled, tears filling her eyes once more before he squeezed her shoulder gently. "Do you remember when we were trying to put the Howling Commandos together and you were mad that I hadn't picked you and that I was taking Bucky away?"

"Yeah I was so pissed," She laughed through another sob, "I was so besides myself because I was so afraid to lose him again."

Steve smiled ruefully, his hand still moving along her shoulder in comfort, "Bucky asked me not to take you. Not because he doubted you or I doubted you, but because he was so afraid to see something happen to you. After one of our first missions he made me promise that if anything ever happen to him, that I would do everything I could to take care of you…And though it seems a little late to be offering just know that…if you need anything, so long as I'm around, I'll be there."

"Me too, Steve," She half sobbed again before offering him a watery smile, "So do we shake or we exchange charm bracelets?"

"You're hilarious."

She threw her head back and laughed before settling against him again, her arms hugging him lazily as she sniffled, "Thanks for everything, Steve."

"Anytime Alley Cat."

They had spent the next few hours taking comfort in the other and allowing nondescript topics flow around them as they caught up with time long gone and for once Steve didn't worry about what the future of this new world held for him. He would take one day at a time and cross each bridge as he came to it, all the while knowing that he didn't have to fight through life alone anymore and that was more of a comfort than he could have ever hoped in having.


	10. 2 Years Past: A Day at the Smithsonian

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_10_

**~2 years later~**

**May 2014**

Nearly two years had past since that night on Alice's couch and Steve had moved down to Washington DC after agreeing to continue to work with S.H.I.E.L.D – a move that Alice had supported - despite her own reservations - for the simple reason her friend had been going insane with stationary life. It was clear beyond anything that Steve was fighting an uphill battle and one that Alice knew that all she could do was be there to support him and remind him that life wasn't awful – the practically suicidal patriot had brushed off many of her attempts at help, perhaps not realizing it in himself as he threw himself recklessly back into work. It had done nothing more than make her worry endlessly for her friend as he attempted to pull further and further away. Despite this, the two had kept in contact as Steve began to navigate his way through technology first with only phone calls and soon with text messages and she had near fainted in her humor when Steve figured out images could be sent through such a medium as well – her phone holding more than a few of the photos he had sent as well as screenshots for future blackmail.

During that time Alice had packed up her Boston apartment and decided to make due on the promise she had made Natasha about moving into a colonial and taking a back seat for a while. She had found the perfect area in Winchester, Virginia to set up a stable and ranch as the property was 35 acres and had two separate barns and plenty of open area to maintain pasture as well as area for farmed goods – something Alice had wanted to do since the 1860s when she had been living in the frontier. She had finalized the deal nearly a year ago and had sent her address to the appropriate channels – being Natasha, Clint and Steve in that order – before sharing that with the other Avengers. Tony had made historical jokes at her expense and had visited as frequently as he could manage, though had stopped when he got caught up in a situation involving Pepper and when she had asked if he needed help he had told her to stay retired for a while; if he needed her, he would call. After watching the news she had informed him that if he was going to make stupidly reckless decisions – despite Pepper, Happy and Rhodie there – she was going to become his handler. He had sassed her for a long while before saying she was hired and Alice wasn't too sure he had been entirely sarcastic or joking.

She had taken her time setting up the farm and stable, speaking with the local town government to form a relationship with the VA so that she could offer programs to veterans as well as children, troubled youth and those who were members of the LGBTQ+ community to teach them how to ride and care for the animals. She didn't allow boarding, just out of practicality as she didn't want people on the property at all hours for the sake of her privacy.

She had made herself comfortable and soon hired two farm hands: Ian Harvey and Daniel Sullivan. Ian did more of the business and accounting side of the farm, while Dan was more hands on in ranching and farming, in charge of the staff to be hired to help. She, of course, had them properly vetted by two assassins/spies and none other than Tony Stark himself. Life had been simple and for the first time in two hundred years Alice felt true peace. The horses also helped her take her mind off of her loneliness and gave her the connections she craved while also allowing herself to feel normal.

Clint had been a popular guest at the homestead, bringing his wife Laura as well as his two kids. She and Laura had gotten on like a house on fire, much to Clint's chagrin, and his kids even more so. Cooper had taken some time to get used to her and soon – much like he did to Natasha – had started addressing her as Aunt, soon followed by Lila, and Alice had been so over the moon she had cried. She had started teaching Cooper and Lila how to ride horses and made them promise their parents that they would behave as it was the only way she would continue to teach them. Laura had been so excited at the declaration that she had promptly informed Alice with almost too much cheer that she would shamelessly hold that promise over her kids' heads as her threatening them with Santa Claus was no longer an actual threat. Alice had only laughed.

It was also during this time that Natasha and Clint began teaching her how to truly fight and the two hundred year old mutant didn't know whether to laugh or cry whenever they pointed to the empty barn they had converted for training purposes. Clint had also gotten her comfortable using bow and arrows as another alternative to shooting and she had picked up on it faster than he would have liked, but the two enjoyed pushing each other in competitions as the man was an infuriatingly accurate shot every time and without fail. Alice alternated between affectionately calling him Katniss or Robin Hood and he would laugh and make her training time miserable for the playful jabs. Natasha hadn't been better, the woman pushing the mutant to her literal breaking point before telling her to shake it off and continue. Alice wanted to cry, but she was thankful for Natasha's pushing when she finally managed to successfully knock Clint on his ass.

The two spies had upped her training after that.

Alice had become proficient in enough weapons that she felt comfortable using most in a pinch but she had really come to enjoy working with knives as it gave her an option for both long range and close combat when necessary and she had perfected her staff work to the point she could move the long pole without thinking about it as much. Natasha had pushed her into learning how to use a long chain with a weighted bullet like cylinder on the end that she had instructed was called a _shéng biāo_ or rope dart and had made her learn to use the dart and chains movements to work both long ranged attacks as well as ones in closer combat. This was tested initially by making Alice hit a practice dummy nearly eight feet away and then changing the distance depending on the move and weight of the swing. The goal had been to force Alice to control the swing and allow it to flow with her natural body movements before adding practical martial arts to the weapon. It had quickly become Alice's favorite tool and when she had become proficient enough, Natasha had produced a newer model that she had Stark make that had blades and other modifications to it so that Alice could truly use it in any situation. The mutant had hugged Natasha so suddenly she thought she may end up on the floor for her trouble, but the Russian had only hugged back with a small laugh that showed she was slightly uncomfortable before making Alice use the new weapon without the fun bits in a spar against both her and Clint – a true test to see if the mutant was retaining the material she had been taught.

For the first time in a long time, Alice felt almost normal and she explained it to Steve almost daily as the patriot and her continued their daily conversations. The man had come to visit her frequently as well, offering to help her training by allowing her to spar with someone who was more on a level of foes they would surely face if she continued to help them on missions. She had taken him up on the offer and found the sparring was a huge educational curve as most of the moves that Clint and Natasha had taught her had been enough to keep her afloat in a fight and work towards strengthening her weaknesses and highlighting her strengths. Steve was pure, juiced up super-soldier and a lot of her hits she needed to throw the entirety of her weight behind just to make him stumble. When Natasha had found out she had been sparring with Steve, the spy had begun teaching her the dirtier ways to fight and use a man's weight against them as Alice was considerably smaller than both super-solider and arrow wielder and just five inches shy of the Russian's five feet and five inches. The months had passed in a delightful blur and in relative peace and she knew better than to squander it.

"Where can I put these?"

Alice was brought from her musings as she turned to look at the lanky redheaded man who had spoken around a cigarette in his mouth and she smirked, walking forward and snatching the tobacco stick from his mouth and tossing it in a nearby water bucket, "Those'll kill you." She said by way of explanation at the indignant cry that escaped the man's lips, "You can put those harnesses up on the racks at the end," She instructed with a smile. "And then we get to suit up for a bit."

Dan sighed as he adjusted his baseball cap, glancing longingly at the cigarette that floated in the bucket before nodding to the smaller brunette, "You got it boss."

She smiled before watching as he moved to the other side of the barn. Dan was a young man recently graduated from college and he had been having trouble finding work despite his good GPA and Alice had taken pity on him when he had been fired from his job at the local bar for giving a guy an attitude. She had wasted no time scooping him up as he was a good worker and he was great with kids. He stood at a shocking six foot and two inches and was lanky. He favored hoodies, flannels, jeans and construction boots and he hadn't failed at wearing the ensemble nearly every day he was there. He had shocking red hair and he had continuously groused that his stubble would never grow into a proper beard because it always seemed to grow in blonde and the mutant would always laugh. She paid him and Ian well to be there and she knew that despite her constant teasing and his gruffness that he enjoyed the work as much as she did.

Alice was currently dressed in a black loose fitting, ladies henley that barely scraped the top of her cleavage as well as a green flannel over top of it and a pair of light washed skinny jeans that had been tucked into high socks and her work boots. Alice had taken to carrying gloves with her as the work on the ranch never seemed to be finished and as much as she enjoyed callousing her hands, her mutation consistently proved that the attempts were futile as the skin would heal itself faster than it would harden. She had, at one point, had to explain her mutation to her two trusted employees after she had gotten kicked by a horse in the chest and had bounced back too quickly for it to have been normal. They had taken it in stride and hadn't questioned further and keeping it more hushed when they began to hire more hands.

They were just about to leave the barn when her phone began to ring and she frowned before glancing at the caller ID, "Hang on, Dan, I gotta take this."

"I'll start gettin' saddled up."

She nodded to him before sliding the answer button across the screen and smiling, "Steve, what'd I tell you about calling during business hours." His laugh sounded forced and she immediately knew something was wrong, "Steve?"

" _I um…I was going to check out the exhibit at the museum_ …" She knew the exhibit he was talking about since it had been all over the news and sighed softly, " _I didn't know if you'd be okay joining me_."

"When're you planning on going?"

" _Tomorrow…I've had a long day_."

She pulled her phone away from her ear, putting him on speaker for a moment so she could access her calendar. Seeing that she didn't have any lessons planned for the day she allowed a small smile to twitch on her lips, "I don't have any lessons or anything else planned so it's looks like I'm free."

The relief in Steve's voice was tangible and she wondered what had happened to bother her friend so much that he'd want to dredge up old memories, " _That sounds great. I'm thinking around noon…does that give you enough time?_ "

"Yeah, I can finish with the animals by ten and hit the road right after…should take me about an hour and a half to get into DC." She had made the trip to visit him multiple times and knew the route easily enough, "Do you want me to swing by and pick you up?"

" _If it's not too much trouble_."

"Never," She smiled as she took the reins from Dan with a mouthed thanks before swinging herself into the horse's saddle and patting the mammal's strong neck. "If we're heading to the museum I'd rather us only pay for one parking pass, besides it'll be nice for me to chauffer you around for once."

" _Alright. I'll see you tomorrow Al._ "

She allowed herself to laugh as she said her goodbye and hung up the phone, sliding it into her pocket and nodding to her riding mate. "What way we headed?"

"Well, I've got the Kenneth siblings leading a trail now…wanna go make sure they're doin' alright?"

"Well now," She grinned, "I think that sounds like more than a plan. Lead on!"

The man only shook his head before spurring his horse into a cantor and leaving her to follow after him, the mutant enjoying the bright sun with the promise of visiting a friend in the morning. Things were certainly looking good.

**-0-**

"One cappuccino with a very special pump of vanilla for you and one very delicious looking caramel latte with oat-milk for me," Alice smiled as Steve tucked into her car the next morning after she had called him from outside his building. "There's also a buttered croissant in there for you…figured you didn't bother with breakfast, seriously super-soldier or not you have to feed that furnace you call a metabolism."

"I don't know whether to be happy that you look out for me or nervous that you seem to know me so well."

She offered the patriot a smirk as she took in his appearance. He wore a baseball cap with a dark blue sports jacket and a white tee that he had left untucked from his dark washed jeans. She was dressed similarly with in a white baseball cap, faded charcoal grey crewneck sweatshirt that was slightly too large on her small frame with a random logo emblazoned on the front from a thrift store she had managed to find and black skinny jeans with rips at the knees that she had tucked into her work boots. Her hair – which she had kept on the shorter side and generally rested at her shoulders – was pulled back in a messy bun at the back of her neck and had subtle highlights running through the ends in what they were calling a balayage. Her sleeves had been pushed up to her elbows and showing off the scripted tattoo that stretched from her wrist to her elbow. They looked so normal and she almost laughed, instead hiding it with a sip of her coffee.

"I like your hair, by the way."

"Aw Steve," She cooed teasingly as she took in his face, "if I didn't know any better – and I _do_ –I'd say you were trying to flatter me."

The patriot's brow disappeared beyond the brim of his hat. There was a storm brewing behind his eyes and Alice clearly thought the best way to keep his mind off of it was to make jokes at his expense, though he found he didn't mind. "I've seen it around on some of the other girls and its different…it's nice."

"Go ahead and break my heart, Steven, it's totally fine." She chastised without any real heat as she threw him a smirk to show she hadn't taken offense and was teasing him, "I get all dolled up for a date with Captain America and he points out my hair is just like every other girls he's seen."

He shot her a disparaging look before unwrapping the pastry, "You're certainly in a mood today, Alice."

"And so are you," She remarked as she turned down another street, not bothering to look at him as she spoke, "I'm finding it odd that you want to suddenly take a walk down memory lane. What's going on? Did something happen?"

It took a while for Steve to answer her and she distracted herself with focusing on DC traffic, not in any particular rush to get to the Smithsonian. She waited patiently; the soft rock that pulsed through her speakers was low and filled the silence. "I was sent on a recovery mission last night…simple enough," He began, a deep frown finding home on his handsome features. "Natasha and I were sent in with the S.H.I.E.L.D Strike team and I thought the mission was simply hostage retrieval, but Nat was given a different mission."

Alice considered her friend's statement and immediately noting his frustration. Steve had told her about when he had rejoined S.H.I.E.L.D he had taken on role of leader for almost all of the missions he had been sent on in the last year and had come to view the task force almost as he did with the Commandos. He liked knowing that everyone was on the same page when it came to missions and he didn't like when there were avoidable variables outside of his control. As she considered this she periodically took a sip of her coffee, watching out of the corner of her eye to see that he was munching on the food she had brought him. After another moment of consideration she spoke.

"I can understand where you're coming from…"

"But you think giving Nat a different mission wasn't necessarily the wrong move."

She gaped at him when he shot his ire at her, "That's not what I said. I get where you're coming from, Steve, because I've worked with you and watched you work for a long time. What I was _going_ to say was that while I can see why Fury would give Nat a mission that wouldn't include you, I don't agree with you being left out on important information. I get why you'd be upset by that. But did you think to ask her if she was ordered not to tell you?" When Steve didn't answer she sighed softly, "Nat isn't as bad as you make her out to be…you've fought side by side before and you know that so long as she's working she's going to follow the orders she's given by the person assigning her the mission." When he glared out of the window in front of him she sighed, muttering, "Guess that's what happens when a soldier starts working as a spy."

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?"

"It means you fix your attitude, Rogers." She glared at him without any real heat, "I'm not telling you how to make your living. Hell, I didn't say anything when you joined S.H.I.E.L.D it's just…I _worry_ about you damnit. The last thing I want is for you to become something you don't want to be just because you can't think of anything else to get you by and I definitely don't want you to push potential friends away because you're angry…whether at Fury or yourself, I don't care. I…I dunno, I'm just – can you promise me that you'll be careful?"

"I know you don't trust S.H.I.E.L.D –"

" _Promise_ me."

Steve sighed after a moment before glancing at her and offering her a tired smile, "Alright, I promise. That wasn't the only thing though…"

"Then what?"

He frowned again, hiding it behind a sip of coffee and sighing, "S.H.I.E.L.D is working on a thing called _Project Insight_. It's a three helicarrier system that works off of satellites and can eliminate a thousand hostiles a minute."

When she stared at him he quirked a brow, "When did they start this?"

"I don't know…I just found out about it this morning."

"So your mission was last night…"

"Yeah…among the hostages rescued was the lead technician in charge of the project."

Alice was silent for a few moments as she considered this information. It wasn't unusual for S.H.I.E.L.D agents to have multiple jobs within the organization and especially at the Triskelion in DC, but the mutant couldn't help but wonder what agent could have that level of clearance. With a project proposal such as _Insight_ would require Fury and Maria Hill's level clearance as well as one or both of them to know the finer details over the program.

"Who was it?" When Steve met her eyes with a quirked brow and mouth full of croissant, Alice clarified. "The technician?"

Steve swallowed his food before answering, "Jasper Sitwell."

" _Sitwell_?That asshole... _seriously_?!" She barked around an incredulous snort, "Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ, it's like S.H.I.E.L.D isn't even _trying_ to keep their dirty laundry hidden!"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Alice sighed, "A project like that would need clearance levels that go beyond Sitwell's –"

"How do you…" Steve drew off before heaving a long-suffering sigh and running a hand down the side of his face in exasperation, "You hacked the systems. We _talked_ about this."

"What do you want me to do, Steve, just sit home like a housewife and _worry_!?"

"Yes!" The patriot groaned in exasperation before waving his hands in a placating manner when her brows disappeared fully beneath her hat in an expression that showed she hadn't expected him to agree with her and he quickly back-peddled, "No, of course not th-that's not what I meant, I just…Al you're supposed to be _retired_ , not worrying about S.H.I.E.L.D or any of their projects!"

Alice snorted in derision, "Yeah picture me as a housewife. By the way, I'm offended." She poked him roughly in the arm earning her a half-hearted "ow" from the patriot for her jab, "I hack their system periodically to make sure that they're not up to anything fishy, you _know_ that."

"And you knew about _Insight_?"

"Literally not until you just mentioned it," She replied honestly with a shrug. "There're some places I'm not willing to delve into within their servers as a means of self-preservation. I know I _can_ hack their more secure files, but I'd rather not draw any unwanted attention…well more so than usual." She quickly amended at the deadpanned look Steve shot her and she sighed softly. "Anyway, I thought Sitwell had a low level clearance – he's literally a technician and in order to be on a project as big as you're saying it is would need clearance that's up there with Hill's or Fury's…it's just odd that this no-named agent has such high clearance and seems to be the lynchpin to the operation."

Steve snorted, "Probably why they have him on it…because it defies a hacker's logic."

"Your sass, Mr. America, is _not_ appreciated."

The patriot snorted on a laugh before taking a sip of his coffee and sighing. "Anyway, the project is supposedly geared towards terrorists that are already known within S.H.I.E.L.D's database – at least that's what I'm hoping."

"How are they supposed to do that?" Alice finally asked after a short beat of silence, though the question seemed to be more to herself than the man sitting beside her and Steve merely shrugged. Once they were stopped at a red light she turned her head to actually look at him. "The only way something like that could potentially work is if the satellites can read the DNA of the exact person that they're targeting, but that matrixing system would be next to impossible to produce complete accuracy even with all of the technology S.H.I.E.L.D has at its disposal."

"I don't know, but apparently, when they're done, these will be able to." Steve sighed through his visible frustration. "They're trying to neutralize threats before they become threats."

"So much for democracy," She muttered with sarcasm a scowl tugging at her lips. "I thought they would've learned from their mistakes with the Tesseract. What do they plan to do? Hold a gun to the heads of _seven billion people_ and for what? That's not freedom."

Steve couldn't help but smile at the woman, "I said the same thing. Then, I had the SSR records shoved into my face for my trouble. Apparently, _S.H.I.E.L.D takes the world as it is, not as we'd like it to be_."

"Did Fury say that? It sounds like Fury said that." She grumbled and when Steve scoffed loudly she knew she was right. "It's nothing short of fascism. I don't trust it."

"You don't trust anything S.H.I.E.L.D does."

"Yeah and for good reason," She snorted reproachfully, "Give me _one_ instance where I've been wrong so far…just one, I'll wait." When he rolled his eyes at her she knew she had won and she glanced at him, "Look…you promised me you'd be careful and that's all I can ask you to be. But, I don't have plans on going anywhere…so don't you dare try to push me away, Rogers, got it?"

"I know, Alice…thanks."

"Sure." She forced a smile before focusing her attention on the road once more. Steve sighed as he looked at her, her lips pursed in what he assumed was thought after a moment he cleared his throat to get her attention and almost laughed when her brows furrowed over her hazel eyes, "I didn't get to ask you yesterday but how's the farm doing? I'm sorry I haven't visited in a while…"

"Eh, don't worry about it. I know you're busy." She smiled, the previous tension easing from her narrow shoulders. "The farm's doing well actually. Dan and Ian have pretty much taken over at this point and I get to have a little more freedom now that we've been in business for a little over a year and a half now."

"That's great, Alice!"

She blushed, "Thanks…I started it out because I have a fond attachment to the 1860s and because I knew I needed something to keep me busy and it's worked, but…"

"But?"

"I miss you guys." She shrugged and took another sip of her coffee. "Don't get me wrong, I certainly don't miss aliens or invasions or war, but I miss seeing everyone together and doing _nothing_. Every time I've tried to get Tony out of New York he's "yes-ed" me to death and said that he'd come next time; you and Nat are working for S.H.I.E.L.D; Clint is on vacation ( _he isn't,_ Alice thought to herself, _Cooper's got baseball and Lila's school is showing_ Beauty and the Beast _and she was cast as a Spoon and she insisted on him being there._ ) and Bruce hasn't answered any of my calls. I dunno…I feel like – now that I'm working so hard to build connections – every step I take forward, I'm being knocked three steps back." Her thumbs beat a rhythm against her steering wheel as she stayed attentive to driving, "I don't remember people being this difficult."

"Well, no one is like us either." He smiled with sympathy for the woman. Alice had been trying to be better about forging friendships and as much as it shouldn't have, it comforted him to know he wasn't the only one struggling at the friendship thing. "Just give it time…I'm sure everyone is just busy."

"Maybe," She shrugged before offering him a smile. "You at least answer the phone. Next time I see Bruce I'm reading him the riot act."

"The poor man."

"Even the Hulk won't be spared."

"Oh, God, please no," He snickered and taking a sip of his sweetened caffeine. "New York will suffer and then we'll be on clean up because Stark won't let the relief team help us."

"Didn't think of that," Alice hummed as they pulled to another stop light. "I'm sure I'll think of something. But in all seriousness, the farm is doing well and I get to play with horses and grow my own food. It's a pretty sweet gig…peaceful."

Steve took the time to truly study Alice and found that what she said was true. Her expressions were open – more so than normal as she preferred her aloof mask in an effort to hide her true thoughts and admittedly it had bothered him for quite some time – her moods had barely fell beyond mild annoyance of late and her posture was relaxed. She had built muscle tone that went beyond her training and she truly did seem to be relaxed. He couldn't help but be happy for the woman knowing what he did about her and the thought brought him comfort to see his friend doing so well. "I really am happy for you Alice."

"Thanks," She allowed as she glanced at him. "I'll be honest, I didn't know how everything was going to go and I certainly didn't picture us being this close two years ago."

"Me neither. When we were working for S.H.I.E.L.D back then I thought you were being obstinate on purpose –"

"Oh, I was _definitely_ doing that on purpose."

The patriot rolled his eyes, ignoring the teasing interruption, "And thought you were going to be like Tony."

"A horrifying idea I'll grant you," She teased. "But I'm glad that I was wrong…and I'm glad you're still here."

"Me too, Allie," He smiled after taking another long draft of his coffee. Alice suddenly sat up straighter and Steve became concerned at the sudden change in her features.

"Does this mean we need charms to signify our friendship?"

"What?"

Alice laughed loudly, her eyes watering at the hopelessly confused look on Steve's face, "Nat and Clint have them, I thought it'd be a hilarious comparison."

"You scared me…"

"Oh no! Not Captain America!"

"Shut up, Alice."

"I'm the annoying sibling you never wanted and you know it," She smirked knowingly and ignoring his eye roll, "Admit it, Rogers, you love me and you'd be lost without me."

"Yeah definitely a sibling I never wanted." He stated and leaning his head back into the seat, his expression warm despite the deadpan of his statement. "So, what kind of charms would Captain America and his not-a-super hero-or-teammate-but-has-a-super hero-alias best friend have?"

"It'd have to be something that's simple," She pursed her lips in thought amusement filtering over her face. "Maybe a shield for me and a…I don't know?"

"Could do a cat."

"A cat?"

"Yeah, y'know, because we used to call you Alley Cat and Stark literally leaked the name Hellcat for your alias an _–_ _what_ is so funny?!"

"I'm sorry," Alice breathed and wiping her eyes, "I'm just trying to picture you wearing a cat necklace." She glanced at Steve only to begin laughing all over again at the pout on his face and she wished desperately she had a camera to document the moment. She had made Captain America pout and she felt accomplished for it.

"Well, I don't know what else we can do. It's not like you've got a suit or symbol or anything."

"Yeah," The mutant snickered, "left my super-suit at home so we're SOL."

"SOL?"

"Oh you're _cute_ ," At Steve's deadpanned stare she laughed again, "Shit out of luck."

"Language."

"I'm going to pretend you didn't just tell _me_ , someone one hundred and sixty-six years your senior, to watch my language." Steve had the decency to blush before clearing his throat and sending her a helpless look.

"Please don't let anyone else know…it just slipped."

She pat his leg with a grin, "Don't worry…your secret is safe with me, Buddy."

And suddenly Steve was rolling his eyes again and earning another giggle from the mutant. "Somehow I don't feel comforted."

"You're gonna wish you hadn't said it…but I'm not gonna torture you too badly."

"Yay, me."

"You know…I think I like moody-Steve better than mopey-Steve so if you could bring him back out that'd be awesome."

"Shut up Alice."

"It's official, you're getting a cat charm for your friendship charm and I don't wanna hear anything else about it."

"For someone one hundred and sixty-six years my senior you're acting like a five year old."

Alice's brows disappeared beneath her hat as she pouted, "That's mean."

"You asked for moody-Steve."

"Well put him away and bring someone else out, my heart can't take it."

Steve smiled despite the teasing at his expense.

He and Alice _had_ become close friends over the last two years and he couldn't have been more thankful for her interference in his life once again as it had helped him more than he'd ever admit. Sure, he kept a notebook of things he didn't understand on his person, and he never failed to call and ask her about them and if she wasn't fully sure she made sure to find out, but he still had a rough time adjusting. Despite the teasing from the older woman she allowed him to see the simpler things in life and he was happy he wasn't going through everything alone – despite the hollow feeling of loneliness that gripped him when he found himself alone. Steve had come a long way from the man who had just woken up to a world so much different than the one he was used to and he owed part of that to Alice who had helped him navigate the changed times with a patient hand and a laugh or two along the way. But there were parts of him, ones he didn't allow anyone else to truly know about that weren't ready to leave his old life behind. No matter how many girls Natasha suggested he try seeing or how many movies Alice suggested he watch, he wasn't ready to move on. It was why he frequented museums; to see parts of the past that were still so recent for him and to manage the turmoil he faced every night in his lonely DC apartment that was filled with nothing he had attachment to – Natasha's doing when she realized he hadn't bothered decorating the large space. Steve still feared going with the spy to any form of IKEA – though he remembered Alice getting a good laugh out of the story at his expense and to his utter embarrassment as both women would team up to tease him about it every now and then. Alice had taken a week to help Natasha decorate his apartment, her suggestions making him feel a little more comfortable in the more modern surroundings. Shaking these thoughts he turned back to her once more, the mutant reaching for her coffee distracting him from his thoughts.

"You're brooding."

"No, I'm just thinking…" Alice glanced at him before shrugging and chewing on her lip as if debating what she wanted to say next and his brow quirked and his features softened, "You're doing that thing you do when you don't know if you should say something…"

"Cute," She said sarcastically before her features softened, "I don't remember if I ever really thanked you."

"What for?"

The mutant turned her head to look at him as she pulled to another stop light, the Smithsonian in view. "For sticking with me…after everything I told you. I – I haven't spoken about what happened after World War II and it was nice…to let someone else in about it."

"Anytime you need to talk you know I'm here," Steve stated with such sincerity that the mutant turned away from him. "You're not alone and you don't have to be again."

She smiled at him, ignoring the flooding of emotions settling in her sinuses and causing her eyes to water, "What would I do without you?"

"I should be saying that…you and I both know it."

"Maybe, but even still…thanks."

"Always, Alice."

She wiped her eyes quickly as she regained control of her emotions, offering him a sincere smile – one that showed her dimples – as they pulled up to the museum and parking, "Now, let's go take a walk."

After paying their entrance fee into the museum Alice and Steve walked leisurely about the different exhibits, conversing about each one as they did and comparing notes to when they had been living in the 1940s and how different museums were from back then. After glancing around the flight exhibit they made their way to where the World War II exhibit was and ultimately where the _Captain America and his Howling Commandos_ section would be. Just outside of it Alice stopped the patriot, her face colored in concern.

"Steve, hang on a moment…" Steve glanced from the hand that still held his arm and then to the woman standing next to him. "Are you sure…are you sure you want to reopen these old wounds?"

The patriot considered her face for a few moments and after a moment he frowned, turning to face her fully. "Allie…I'm not ready to let these things go…I can't." When her groomed brows furrowed beneath her baseball cap he sighed, "Coming to see them…despite them not being here anymore…it reminds me who I am and what I'm meant to do. I went under when the world was at war…I don't know much else and I don't think that there's anything for me beyond that."

At the admission Alice sighed sadly and nodded her acceptance, her concern palpable and the patriot would never admit how much of a comfort it was to know that he had found such a dear friend in the mutant. "Alright…you _do_ know that this isn't the Museum of Natural History…they've managed to make this a rather large exhibit of all of your successes and failures and not just yours."

"I know."

"Then lay on McDuff," She gestured to the exhibit, ignoring the P.A. system in the area that was dictating facts about Steve and the Howling Commandos. They traced the twists and turns of the exhibit and before long, Alice found herself staring at a picture of Bucky in the center of the exhibit and across from where the Howling Commandos' uniforms had been on display with each of their faces over the respected uniform. Steve had wandered to this side of the exhibit, but Alice's hazel eyes traced the face of the man who she hated to admit still held her heart in such a tight and unwavering grasp.

" _Best friends since childhood, Bucky Barnes and Steven Rogers were inseparable on both schoolyard and battlefield._ " The P.A. system spoke from next to his proud image," _Barnes is the only Howling Commando to give his life in service of his country_."

Her eyes scanned the biography next to his handsome face and she had to blink back tears as her fingers twisted the charm at her neck. The motion was not lost to her companion, who had since rejoined her, but she ignored it in favor of reading the long paragraphs and watching as images flickered from the small prompter off to the side that showed pictures of each of them as well as videos. There were pictures of him mostly with Steve as well as a few of the two of them. She knew her image would be down further in the exhibit as she had not formally been a Commando, but through reading it appeared as if whoever had put the information together had taken care to mention her and her assistance to the Commandos as well as her relationship with their fallen comrade.

She ignored when Steve pulled her into his side, an effort to comfort her and she appreciated the gesture. Alice had starved herself of human connection for most of her long life and the patriot had learned quickly that she responded positively to touch. The both of them knew it was the quickest way to help lift the mutant's spirits and satisfy the social need of connection that secretly Steve craved as well. She enjoyed hugs and she gave them frequently, but the only ones who seemed to genuinely enjoy the contact had been Steve, her dog or her horses and Clint whenever he was around.

"You okay?"

"Yeah," She replied as she looked up at him. "I just… _miss_ him."

"Me too."

Silence hung in the air between them for a moment before Alice cleared her throat awkwardly and forced a smile, "Shall we?"

"Sure."

The two turned, Steve dropping his arm as they began walking once more, but allowing her to thread her arm through his and strolling into the amphitheater that seemed to split the exhibit in half and forcing people to go through to get to the next portion of the exhibit. Alice and Steve watched as old footage was played before them, both familiar with the images before it cut to a woman with dark hair and dark eyes and one that the mutant thought looked vaguely familiar. She was a beautiful woman, Alice couldn't help but notice, with strong features and rose red lipstick painting her pouted lips, her hair styled in perfect curls. She wore a business suit and while she looked regal, there was a deep sadness behind her chocolate eyes that Alice sympathized with as it was the same look she saw every time she looked in a mirror. The name scrawled across the bottom of the screen showed that her name was Margaret "Peggy" Carter and Alice glanced at Steve to see him watching the video with a sad smile and it was then she realized that this was Steve's _Peggy_ , the woman he still loved so dearly and she understood why he'd wanted to come.

" _That was a difficult winter._ " She explained, her accent suited for story-telling and betraying her British heritage, Alice realized with a gentle smile." _A blizzard had trapped half our battalion behind the German line. Steve...Captain Rogers, he fought his way through a HYDRA blockade that had pinned our allies down for months._ " With a glance at the man next to her, Alice watched as he took out an old compass, opening it to see that there was an image of a younger Peggy staring back at him. Alice understood the patriot more in that moment than she had in two years and she gently took his hand, squeezing it in an effort to show that she was there and that they would get through this. She nearly smiled when Steve squeezed her hand back and she returned her eyes to the screen," _He saved over a thousand men, including the man who would...who would become my husband as it turned out. Even after he died, Steve was still changing my life_."

The two watched the rest of the short film in silence and sat for what seemed like forever after it ended before they stood, noticing another group coming into the theater. They continued through the exhibit until they reached the one dedicated to the Army Nursing Corps that belonged to the U.S. Army and she sighed softly as her image was portrayed at the heart of the exhibit along with the three other nurses of the 107th. It hadn't been lost that she had been the sole survivor of the 107th's field hospital in Umbria after the Battle of Azzano and there had been much speculation about it, but it had earned her a silver star and a purple heart, which she had donated back to the museum some time ago. She sighed softly as her eyes traced the familiar faces of the nurses she had served with from both the 71st as well as the three nurses she had been transferred with - ignoring her blurb all together.

Steve's eyes scanned the informational blurb about her, his brows furrowing as he continued to read before glancing at the woman beside him. Alice had never told him what exactly had happened to leave her as the survivor of the 107th; seeming to find it too painful for even her to bring up, but reading the blurb he found there wasn't much of an answer there either. The information was vague, but wrapped in some truth and he had assumed she had kept it that way – though the information linking her back to Bucky had not been omitted and it was clear that whoever had put the exhibit together had done quite a lot of research considering it wasn't well known that she and Bucky had been involved – but he was surprised as he continued to read that she had been awarded a promotion after the Battle of Azzano, something that neither he or Bucky had been aware of as the Commandos affectionately continued to call her LT for her rank.

_Alice Elizabeth "Alley Cat" Alexander  
  
Born November 1st, 1920 Alexander grew up in Boston, Massachusetts and was the middle child of four.  
An excellent student, she graduated top of her class and studied at a local college.  
Alexander enlisted in the Army Nursing Corps in 1942 after Pearl Harbor where she excelled in her program  
being awarded the rank of Second-Lieutenant before her peers and went through basic at Fort Devens, Massachusetts.  
Alexander was assigned to the 71st field hospital and was deployed with the 101st to the Italian Front. She was  
later transferred to the U.S. 107th where she earned the title of the Hellcat of the Western Front and the Witch  
Doctor of the 107th, deploying the use of botany and herbal medicine in place of other supplies._

_It was in this place she met future sweetheart: Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes and friends Sergeant Timothy  
Alloysius Cadwaller Dugan and Private Gabriel Jones who would later become Captain America's Howling Commandos.  
When the 107th was captured by HYDRA forces their field hospital came under heavy artillery and mortars,  
destroying the hospital and those in it with the exception of Alexander who was taken hostage.  
She, along with the rest of the 107th was liberated by Captain Steven Rogers._

_With Colonel Phillips's recommendation she was promoted to Captain and earned a Silver Star and Purple Heart.  
Though not formally chosen for the elite squad belonging to Captain America, Alexander was called in  
frequently to address severe medical concerns and aid in the education of Private Jim Morita for  
emergency medicine and use of plants to aid the squad while accomplishing missions. She was  
later transferred in winter 1945 to the 80th field hospital where she treated soldiers and civilians alike  
throughout the European Theaters before returning home after the war._

_Alice Alexander_

_1920 - 1963_

"You were made Captain?"

Alice blinked, her eyes having strayed to the blurbs that detailed Fiona, Daphne and Johana's information, involvement and stories before nodding. "Yeah, after you went down and Bucky was presumed dead I took a position with the 80th field hospital which had been stationed along the European front. I was reassigned to Austria where more of the fighting took place and they needed good nurses and Captains were in short supply."

"When…?"

"I was promoted to Captain after Azzano…when we returned to the 107th."

Steve stared at her, "You mean you were a Captain the entire time…why didn't you say anything?"

"It wasn't important," She shrugged her eyes turning to the images of the three nurses and herself standing together wearing their Class A's and smiling with painted lips. "It didn't matter to me that I had been promoted – it was the _last_ thing I had wanted."

"Why's that?"

"Because it meant I couldn't hide behind anonymity like I'd always done before. It meant that I would be recorded in history – like here – which up until World War II I had avoided well enough…but most of all it meant that they really were gone. It didn't seem right to be given a promotion when there weren't any bodies to collect…a promotion paid in blood."

Steve's brows furrowed beneath the brim of his cap. He always knew that while Alice had experience in war, she tended to introvert and hide behind a mask of aloofness in an effort to hide that she was extremely sensitive to death. She didn't like recognition that she felt absolved her of responsibility and it was clear she had felt responsible for what had happened to the 107th's makeshift field hospital. He had read reports that stated that there had truly been no survivors, no remains to collect and barely a set of tags to identify who had been there so that Colonel Phillips could notify families. It had been completely reliant on Alice's memory and she had done so willingly. It was the least she could do, she had told them – mostly Bucky, Dum Dum and Gabe – later at the mess tent, but she hadn't spoken about it further which he and the other Commandos had let slide at the time despite the curiosity burning in their guts and that had been mostly out of respect for Bucky, who had insisted they not ask. They had seen firsthand what HYDRA weapons were capable of, but it begged the question as to why she had survived – not that they hadn't been happy for her, but it still was curious. The suspicion died after Colonel Phillips had cleared her and it hadn't been brought up much afterwards as Alice's job had become harder than ever as the war began to heat up.

He frowned after a moment, his voice soft, "How many wars did you serve?"

Alice was silent for a few moments before she shrugged, "As a nurse? I was involved in the Civil War and World War I and World War II. I graduated from Bellevue in 1916, so the Civil War was kind of a trial by fire since formal education didn't technically exist for women just yet – it didn't actually matter that you were trained but that you could help stop bleeding long enough for a doctor to come about…but the first World War, I was stationed in France and was going under the name of Eliza Sterling from Montgomery, New York…I'm sure if we actually looked we could find records of my time, but I try not to think about it considering I wasn't actively trying to enlist at the time…it just made sense for a new nurse to join the hospitals on the war front and I thought it would have looked more suspicious if I hadn't. I faked my death in 1920 and allowed myself to be me again. Then World War II happened and I enlisted and claimed Boston as my home." When the patriot shot her a look she smirked, "I know…but at least I never claimed to be from _New Jersey_ …Steve from _Paramus_."

The patriot's face soured, "You didn't read that in the exhibit."

"Nope," She offered humorously. "Bucky told me you tried to enlist five times and I thought that for the longest time he was pulling my leg. Come to find out that you were the same Steve he talked about so much." At the patriot's crestfallen look Alice sighed softly, "He loved you, you know."

"Yeah…I know."

"He truly did – he talked about you a lot; it was cute."

"I doubt any of it was good."

"You'd be genuinely surprised. He practically idolized you." Her look suddenly sobered, "Did you know he was drafted?" At Steve's widened eyes and poleaxed expression she assumed not and shook her head cursing the man silently in her mind. "He mentioned it to me after we got back to the 107th…after HYDRA…he never mentioned what had happened to him in there, but he was…different. I suspect that if they didn't do anything they at least tried…he was never really good at hiding it despite what he may have thought," At Steve's small smile she knew he agreed. Bucky was always good at hiding most of his expressions, but his eyes gave him away every time. It had been what had drawn the mutant to him since his eyes were always so expressive and ever changing in shade depending what he was feeling, though her favorite shade was the slate, gun-metal blue that had showed when he was relaxed or happy and it was admittedly her favorite color. "His serial number was 32557038…"

"You knew his serial number?"

"It was on his dog tags." She answered with a sigh and a small smile to indicate that she hadn't been annoyed at his repetitive questions, but it did make her worry. It concerned her that Bucky had never told his friend – who rightfully could have been called his brother with the way he had always talked about Steve – and a part of her felt awful for dropping this information on him. "I told him that he should have told you, but we both know, whether he wanted to be there or not, he was going to do what he had to in order to make sure the both of you got home…he was too stubborn to leave you to fight on your own no matter how strong and juiced up on serum you were." When Steve huffed on a small laugh she shrugged a frown pulling at her lips, "Did you know, in basic, they trained us about what to do if and when we're taken prisoner?"

" _When_?"

She nodded, "They knew it was likely to happen especially to the regiments that were being sent directly to the frontlines…I wasn't briefed until I was being transferred directly to the 107th, but they had assured me that it would never come to us being taken captive due to the Geneva Convention. Little did they know that the Fritz and especially HYDRA didn't give two licks about the accord and would drop bombs on medical transport and field hospitals that were unlucky to be too close to the fight." She hadn't expected the horrified expression on her friend's face and frowned softly. "Did they never tell you about that in basic?"

"I was being toted around as a chorus girl…" He remarked dryly and earning a small smile from the smaller mutant. "Basic was a week long for me and that was just to see who qualified for the serum. They didn't tell me much and I think they assumed after the forming of the Commandos that it would never come down to me being taken as a POW. My tags didn't even really look like anyone else's."

"Probably because you were with the SSR or because you had type 3 tags…Bucky and I had type 2s since we were assigned in 1942." She shrugged once more, before her arms crossed in front of her chest almost as if she was hugging herself, "I'm sorry you're finding out like this…It wasn't my intention to just drop a bomb on you…at least an unexpected one, I normally try to give you warning before wrecking your beliefs."

Steve snorted, "You'd drop them anyway. But it's not your fault…you couldn't have known that he never told me. I just wish I had read him better when he said he had enlisted…he told _everyone_ that he did. Hell, even his memorial says he _enlisted_."

"Sounds more like he was scared…" She frowned. "For the short amount of time I actually knew him, comparatively, he didn't strike me as the kind of man who would be open to looking anything but the role model especially since he looked up to you so much. The way he spoke about you, Rebecca, Lottie and Marie told me as much. You all looked up to him and I doubt he wanted to let any of you down considering you wanted so badly to fight."

"It makes sense," Her friend admitted with a small slouch to his shoulders. "Our dads were stationed with the 107th during World War I."

"I didn't realize…"

"The 107th was known for heading to the front lines and we always talked about wanting to follow in our dad's footsteps, but it was never in the cards for me…and after Buck's dad passed away a lot of responsibility fell on him to help take care of his siblings and his mom…it was a rough time for all of us…our families were close and my dad passed overseas during World War I, but we got through it. I just feel bad that he never got to do anything he wanted to do."

"Like what?"

Steve looked down at her to see that the mutant was being serious and he frowned softly, "Did he never mention it to you?"

"No," She answered after a moment with a small sigh, "probably because he thought he'd never be able to do it, so he ignored it."

"That…sounds like him."

Alice smirked, "He wasn't a particularly hard man to read unless he was actively trying to be. He did tell me that he liked science and was good at math…probably why he was first pick for sharpshooter."

"He loved it," Steve smiled. "Every year he would drag me to the Stark Expo to see what new invention Howard would turn out. The year he was deployed it was a flying car." When Alice laughed softly he smiled. "Buck never really said what he wanted to do after High School since he was working down at the Steel Mill to help his mom, but when we were kids he talked about space almost as much as he did about planes and piloting…he liked to fix things, so he always talked about wanting to work for NACA when we were teenagers."

"That nerd," She snorted, "He never told me that…"

"Well, that may have been because he couldn't afford to go to college…hell, he barely managed to scrape enough together to go to an art class that they offered at Brooklyn College while I was enrolled and he did that just to keep me company." Steve frowned as he collected his thoughts, "It was actually while we were in class that we heard about Pearl Harbor and I was the first to say we should sign up, but he had said that he needed to pick up his siblings and I didn't think anything of it…but now I know _why_ …Anyway, my health was awful and I'm not really sure how I managed to survive becoming an adult…maybe it was my own stubbornness or Bucky's influence, but we both knew there'd be no way for me to join no matter how many times I tried to enlist." He chuckled suddenly, his eyes hidden by his baseball cap, "He was so angry whenever he found a new enlistment form at my apartment or in my pocket. I'd tried twice while he was in basic just to avoid him getting mad at me, the fourth was after I was getting my ass handed to me in an alley after Buck had gotten home from basic and got his assignment" Her amusement wasn't missed by him and he assumed his friend had told the mutant the story, "…the last time Erskine hijacked my examination and gave me the 1A to get me into the running for the serum. Bucky never knew."

Alice watched the emotions playing out on her friend's face in silence before sighing softly, "I don't know if he ever said it to you, but he was proud of you…a little worried more often than not which he made especially sure to mention in his letters, but he looked up to you probably as much as you had looked up to him."

Steve's smile softened as he looked down at the mutant, who was playing with the coin on her necklace almost as if it was a lifeline, "I knew he wrote to you all the time…especially since you were still with the 107th, not that I knew you were a _Captain_." Alice waved him off and he continued, "He was always antsy when he hadn't heard from you…normally Dum Dum ran interference when I couldn't."

"Those two," Alice sighed, "were literally the worst together…add Gabe into that mix and it was _trouble_. Then you were added along with the other guys and I swear if I hadn't known that I couldn't die, I would have had an aneurism just worrying about you chuckleheads."

"We _were_ pretty reckless…"

" _You_ were reckless and those idiots were just as bad as you were and the ones who had any sense didn't know how to tell you that you were insane."

"Maybe we should have taken you on," Steve admitted with a small smile, "but I wouldn't have been able to live with Bucky constantly worrying about you."

Alice rolled her eyes before sighing softly, "I still have his letters…after he died and you went into the ice I couldn't get rid of them. I only had them and his coin and I didn't want to let either of them go no matter how much it hurt to have the reminder for a while. When I realized I was being hunted after I came back I sent my stuff to Rebecca to keep watch over and then when I got out of that lab I managed to get all of it back."

"How'd she manage that?"

"I had a safe house where I kept anything important…I gave her the key and left her a list of what could be sold off if she was in need of a quick way to make money. I funded myself throughout the years by slowly turning over small trinkets to museums and claiming a small finder's fee…it was the least I could do for Bucky's family and I was happy to know she had taken me up on it." She smiled softly, "We still speak every once and a while…which was _weird_ to explain how I looked the same, but they all took it surprisingly well."

"You…still keep in contact with them?"

"I can give you their information if you'd like. They know you're around and I'm sure they'd be happy to see you. I don't actively meet with Lottie or Marie anymore since they're on the other side of the country, but Rebecca still lives in Brooklyn."

"I think I'd like that."

The two passed the rest of the exhibits in a relative blur before coming to the end and moving on. Not much was said between them during the time they walked. Steve seemed lost to his thoughts and Alice wasn't much better as her hand continued to play with the coin on her neck. She couldn't help but wonder if this is what their lot was in life – to live with the hauntings of the past and try to make up for lost time. She shook her head, knowing that this was more of an inconvenience to her rather than a burden she'd be doomed to carry as her life was not stopping any time soon, but a quick glance at Steve had her reconsidering the thought. To him it wasn't just an inconvenience but it _was_ a burden and he felt as if it was his cross to bear, she only hoped that he realized that it wasn't one he had to carry alone.

Clearing her throat she drew the man's attention to her and she offered him a smile, "Wanna grab another coffee?"

"Sure," He agreed mindlessly, still lost in the storm of his thoughts and Alice quickly took the lead. They got their coffees before Alice nodded her head to the patio seats, leading him to one that was off to the side and away from others so they could have semblance of privacy. When they sat she studied him and frowned softly, but before she could speak he was already talking. "I found her…Peggy…not too long ago."

She shot him a knowing look and offered him a gentle smile, "That's wonderful…"

He nodded before reclining in the seat and sighing as he played with the lip of the cup, ignoring the near hopeful look on her face, "She's in a nursing home…Alzheimer's."

She reached out once more, laying her hand atop his own and squeezing, "Steve I'm so sorry…but it's good that you've found each other again."

"Yeah," He mumbled, watching their hands on the table before he sighed. "I just…Is this what it's like?" When she shot him a questioning look he clarified, "For you? Is this what it's like for you – to look at people you once knew and see them so far ahead that it leaves you feeling alone…knowing that any day could be their last?"

"It's a complicated question," Alice decided as she met his eyes. "And there's no easy answer to it. Days are like moments in time for me and I don't process it the same way someone without my mutation would…someone who is considered normal. It's…hard to explain."

When Steve snorted she continued making an effort to gather her staggering thoughts at the abruptness of his question and she knew it was something that he needed. Steve, for all his posturing, was still in his twenties and still had a lot of growing to do – despite his true age being much older he wasn't that age mentally at all and she knew it was something that frustrated him endlessly when confronted with people born of this time period. Even their team didn't seem to remember that while time had gone on and the patriot was technically in his nineties, he was still a young man…a kid, really and it wasn't fair to him to be constantly held to a standard that he couldn't meet. Time had done him a grave disservice and the exhibit within the museum – while wonderful in terms of memorial – was the perfect example of that disservice.

It didn't tell anyone about how Steve had been dragged around like a circus monkey and forced to perform in front of the masses in an effort to monopolize the war in the U.S. at the time. It didn't tell anyone about the man who had been forced into spandex and carted around the world to inspire the allies in times where it seemed – in every sense – to only embellish the _glory of war_. Alice knew her friend was suffering because while the war was very much over and a relative peace had fallen over the world – the term being very loose in Alice's opinion – her friend was still trying to reconcile with the things he had seen and the things that he had done. And much of this, she knew, were things that she couldn't do anything to truly help with. Her only role at this point was to help her friend see that things do get better and that there's still quite a lot to live for despite things not going the way they were planned and it was something she struggled with as well. Steve knew of her own problems, but the patriot was stubbornly tight lipped about his own and that was perhaps because he was surrounded by people he believed wouldn't understand where he was coming from or because there was a small part of him that was trying to live up to the image of _Captain America_ that had been painted over the decades as a symbol of peace. Alice knew enough to understand that Steve Rogers and Captain America were two sides of the same coin, but America had done him an injustice in that they promoted the ideals of the Captain and forgot about the man behind the shield and because of that her friend was forced to agonize in silence.

She sighed softly before meeting his eyes imploringly, begging for him to understand. "For me time is relative. When I met Bucky at that encampment after being transferred from the 71st, I fought hard against the pull I had to him because I knew that for me it would be a brief moment of happiness before I would have to inevitably break his heart and move on to protect myself and my secret. It's always been about that for me and because I haven't been able to accept it until recently I knew that I was doomed for loneliness. You don't have to be me, Steve. There's nothing saying that because of the super-soldier serum that you're like me and that you can't make a good life for yourself. Is it perhaps different than you planned? Of course, but it doesn't change the fact that in five, ten, maybe fifteen years from now you can grow."

"You mean move on," Steve frowned sadly as he looked at her. There was no judgement in her expression and he felt his ire leaving as soon as it had appeared. "You never did…move on, I mean."

"No," She nodded before breathing softly through her nose, her gaze soft. "My circumstance makes it a tad bit more difficult. You and I are similar in that we've been lost to time, but you're not me, Steve and ultimately it's what makes us incredibly different. Some would say it's a luxury, to live forever, but it's not…not truly. I don't age, I don't get sick, I don't die…my curse is my memories…my curse is to remember. Yours doesn't have to be."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** And there we have it folks! The opening chapter to The Winter Soldier and I've never been more proud of a chapter! No lie, this was my favorite chapter to write so far just because of how much fun I could have diving into Steve and Bucky's characters. Considering how into the Stark Expo, Bucky was I decided to lean into the head cannon that he was definitely nerdy to a certain degree. I played around a lot with his family here too, so I apologize for anything that may or may not be accurate, but that's kinda the fun part about fanfic writing ;) The research that went into this chapter alone was asinine - I spent so much time scouring the internet just to try and get an accurate idea of what Bucky's dog tags looked like JUST so I could tell what kind they were (there were a few different ones issued during WWII) and Steve's...it's like they didn't even put effort into making his look realistic so it took me a while there too...but I digress.
> 
> NACA, for those who don't know, stands for National Advisory Committee for Aeronautics. This is what turned into NASA and I thought it was fitting for Bucky to be interested in it :)
> 
> Also, Steve is pure lawful chaotic energy and I stan. After rewatching this movie a bajillion times, I noticed that our star-spangled sweetheart is lowkey a suicidal little nugget of reckless abandon and I thought it was important to add that in here considering the subject matter of this entire movie as we learn who Steve is as a person. But I also have this head cannon where Steve is a little shit who enjoys dark humor. Again, I stan, lmao.
> 
> Regardless I hope you all enjoyed and I hope you'll enjoy my take on the Winter Soldier timeline :)
> 
> All the hugs and kisses of puppies,
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	11. Code Red

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_11_

**September 1942**

Alice sighed as she heaved another box from the back of the transport truck, wiping sweat from her brow as she did. The weather in Italy was hotter than she could have ever imagined and had forced the entire company into building tents as quickly as they could manage in an effort to have some time to relax and the nurses of the 71st were not exempt from these duties.

"Is this the last of them?"

The brunette nodded, "Yeah, thank Christ for that."

The raven haired woman offered her a smile, "I can't wait to be inside that tent and setting everything up. Even with the boys helping us out, we've still got a ways to go."

"I don't think I've ever wanted it to be night time more than I do right now," Alice sighed, dropping down from the truck and grabbing the other side of the crate that Betty held, both of them lifting and making way to where they had been busy setting up the field hospital, the other nurses and two doctors were busy setting up tools, supplies and cots. "Just for a break from this goddamn heat…"

"I'm not looking to cutting out another foxhole," Betty groaned, "but I could do with some cool air for a bit."

"That's if we don't get stuck with any more cases of malaria tonight."

"Don't you dare Alexander," She pointed, though a smile flickered at her lips.

Malaria had been running rampant through the regiments stationed in southern Europe and the field hospitals were kept busy because of it, so Alice's joking assessment was more of a fact than an actual wish for action - they had six cases already and they knew that they couldn't relax until those men were taken care of. It almost seemed as of recent their platoon was seeing more cases than they were actual battle and a small flicker of worry entered her gut. The boys of the 101st had been deployed to Cosenza, Italy from the brisk air of London, England and so the 71st field hospital was sent with them and despite the regiment being briefed that they would see more gunfights than normal on the Italian front, things had been blessedly quiet. It made Alice's stomach churn unpleasantly as she considered the implications of that.

"Did you hear?"

Alice blinked back to reality and sent her fellow nurse a quirked brow in question and earning a sigh from the other woman, "No?"

"Really, Alice, it's a surprise you've managed to make it this far in the Army considering how spacy you seem to be!"

Alice rolled her eyes, "It was only a moment, Betty and my marks were the highest in every class and that includes yours. Now what did I potentially hear?"

"The boys at the 107th were air-raided again last night…"

"Jesus Roosevelt H. Christ," Alice cursed under her breath as she wiped her brow on the inside of her elbow – the scarf she had secured around her locks had caught most of the moisture, but the humidity was a fierce opponent and trails of sweat were still plaguing her eyes. "Any casualties?"

"Well," Betty sighed as she ran a rag over her face, her curls clinging to her neck, "from what I hear the 90th got held back and our boys are still too far out to be of any help."

"The 90th got held back!? From what – where!?"

The other nurse shrugged before sighing softly, "Smith and Reed were talking about it during transport. No one's heard from the 90th since boots hit the ground a week ago so they're assuming the worst…looks like they're pulling a nurse each from each one of the surrounding regiments…one of us is going to be sent out to set up a temporary field hospital."

Alice watched with a slightly slacked jaw as the other nurse turned and began making her way towards the soldiers helping them in building the tent. She sighed softly and reached down to pick up the crate at her feet, shifting it in her arms and following after the other nurse. It wasn't that she didn't get along with the other nurses, but she found them to be presumptuous and that irritated her more then she cared to admit. Betty was someone she could tolerate, but even the raven haired beauty rubbed her the wrong way more often than not and Alice knew that that assessment was mutually shared. Betty along with the three other nurses in their unit, not including Alice, were fresh-faced and young and completely oblivious to what war was – though, admittedly, Betty was the most tolerable. The women consistently complained about the uniform they wore or the weather or their hair and it was enough to drive the mutant up a wall. Alice had served many wars and in each she knew her looks were the least important thing happening.

The other nurses, while on the ship taking them to the Italian front, had scoffed at her as she pinned her hair into a low bun without care to how it looked and hadn't a compact mirror in her musette bag. In fact, Alice had very little personal items as far as her musette bag went – only putting the notebook containing her botany notes, a few jars of premade herbs, a rough herbal soap, candied ginger root (as boats still made her a bit queasy in the best of times) and another notebook that contained her medical notes. If it was one thing she had lost over time it was the delusion of grandeur. She hadn't signed up for the last war on purpose, but this one she knew was different and it would have been absolutely abhorrent of her to sit on the sidelines given the amount she actually did know. She had kept her distance for the most part from the other nurses and instead keeping her nose buried in her notebooks in an effort to keep the small rations they were given where it belonged.

Not everything was bad, however. Alice had met a few men from other regiments that had been packed onto the ship, but otherwise she kept to herself.

With effort she placed the crate down and opening it she began looking through the contents and counting off the inventory inside, her brows furrowing as her thoughts began to wane. How had an entire field hospital simply go _missing_? Rumors of what the 107th was facing compared to the other regiments had inspired a sense of dread and anxiousness to fight shooting through much of the 101st in equal measure and Alice knew that news of the 90th's reported disappearance was going to hit the 71st. None of this had been covered by the Army Nurse Corps since they were protected under the Geneva Convention, but it made the mutant's gut churn with doubt that an agreement as such would be honored by all combatants. She was brought from her thoughts at the calling of her name and she turned sharply noticing Doctor Harold Reed jogging up to her.

"Doctor," she greeted pleasantly as she continued her counts. "What can I do for you?"

"You dig a foxhole yet?"

Alice's brow furrowed at his curt words but shook her head, placing her clipboard down. "I've not had the chance just yet, sir."

"Good, you're shipping out."

"Beg pardon, sir, but shipping out?"

Reed only nodded, his brows furrowed deeply as he looked down at the smaller woman. "I was outvoted and you came highly requested, Alexander, and while I'd love to keep you here you're too damn good at your job." When a satisfied smile crossed her lips at the praise he sighed, "They're askin' for you specifically to replace Second-Lieutenant Morrison for the 107th. You've got an hour to finalize anything that needs finishing and you're back in the truck."

"Yes, sir," She nodded with a sharp solute before offering him a humored smile, "though I've yet to actually set my musette bag or gear in a tent."

"Eager to get out of this heat, Nurse?"

"You could say that, Doctor."

Doctor Reed was a middle-aged man from Rochester, New York and he and the mutant had become friendly with each other after she admitted that she had spent a lot of time in New York. She had admitted that she enjoyed the state simply because she enjoyed how rude the city dwellers were comparatively to Bostonians and the Doctor had had a good laugh at that. She would be sad to leave him, but knew that they would be able to get an easy replacement for her in the coming weeks – the 107th didn't have that option.

"I don't envy you, Alexander." Reed sighed as he ran a large hand through his neat salt and peppered hair, "From what the reports you're gonna be busy and if the heat is anything like it is here it's gonna be like operating with the Devil at your back."

"Where are they stationed?"

"Salerno." When he noticed her face pinch he sighed, "two and a half hours by truck if you don't run into any trouble…like I said, I don't envy you."

"Well, that's wonderful…who do I get for transport?"

"They're sending Manzo and Giudice with you. But I don't doubt that you'll have to pick up some of the driving…you okay with that?"

She shot him a dry look, "I'm sure I can manage."

"Point taken," He agreed with a humored smile before patting her shoulder good-naturedly, "I'll leave you to it. Just stay safe out there."

"You too, Doctor."

"Nurse," He nodded politely before taking his leave.

Alice watched him go before sighing and taking the next few moments to finish her counts before passing the clipboard to Betty who seemed to shoot her a knowing look before the mutant quickly took her musette bag, helmet, gas mask and canteen belts out of the back of the truck she had been originally riding in and taking the items to the smaller truck that Paul Manzo stood beside.

"Well this is shit," He stated upon seeing her, offering her a small smile. She and Paul had become friendly on the ship over to London when she had offered him a ginger candy to help settle his stomach. He was a kid from New Jersey and had luckily been shipped out with his girl's brother, Vincent Giudice. The two of them tended to amuse each other and barely let her get a word in edge-wise but she hadn't minded, enjoying simply existing in their presence. "I was hopin' to hang around here for longer than an hour before shippin' out again."

"Shut up, Paulie!"

Alice quirked a brow, tossing her belongings into the back seat of the jeep and smirking, "Don't tell me you're complaining already."

Vincent snorted, "A diva this one is!"

Vincent and Paul were both Italian-Americans and had the same olive toned skin and dark hair, yet Vincent was stockier than Paul and Paul stood taller than Vincent. The two of them were clowns at best and had done well with keeping themselves amused during the downtime that they had been awarded. Alice knew that she would need their stories and antics to help the two and a half hour drive more manageable.

"Aye, Nurse Alexander...you think there'll be any pretty dames like you at the 107th?"

Alice's brow quirked and she shrugged noncommittally, "Unless you like them with a little hair on their chest, sure."

Paul threw his head back and laughed earning a groan from Vincent, "I knew there was a reason I liked you, Nurse." Vincent flipped him off before continuing to load whatever else they would need for the trip.

It seemed as if the three of them were being sent with some spare supplies to help aide in the creation of the new field hospital - something that wouldn't normally need to happen but considering the odd circumstances the commanding officers must have agreed to send what supplies could be spared without crippling the other hospitals they were pulling nurses from. Alice vaguely wondered how many medical personnel they were transferring considering a normal hospital needed at least two doctors (one of which needed to be a proficient surgeon), five nurses and several orderlies which included at least two or three men to act as transport from the frontline to the field hospital and back again. The entire circumstance was strange, and it brought a frown to Alice's face. In every war she had served all the way back to the Revolutionary War she had never heard of an entire unit simply vanishing. There was always some type of communication whether by scouts, enemies demanding some kind of collateral (this acted more to crush morale of the opposing side and to gather information), Morse Code or at least a radio message before lines would go out. There was nothing in this case, which told the mutant that either they had simply gotten caught or killed before they could reach out - taken by surprise. Could the Fritz be applying guerrilla warfare like the colonists had during the revolution? Alice wasn't sure and as much as she tried to hold it off, she felt dread making home in her chest.

Paul then turned to her, completely oblivious to her darker thoughts and fishing a cigarette out of his musette before sighing, "We have debrief with Colonel Williams and then we're headed out...you got everything you need?"

"Yeah," Alice sighed, wiping her brow once again and taking a sip of water from her canteen. "Lemme just say my goodbyes and I'll meet you at Colonel Williams's tent."

"Sounds good."

She watched as they continued loading the truck before she turned and made her way back to the medic tent to make good on her promise of goodbye. It was likely she wouldn't be seeing these people again and though she hadn't been close to them she didn't want to leave without at least being courteous.

**-0-**

Alice frowned as she looked up at the S.H.I.E.L.D building, otherwise known as The Triskelion, in front of her. She and Steve had split a few hours before, the patriot muttering something about visiting Peggy before disappearing and Alice knew that she had her own demons to face. Glancing at her watch she sighed, noticing it to be getting late before sending a quick text to Dan and asking him to stop in to feed the animals before stepping into the building. She had managed to easily check in and had been given directions to Fury's office, and she knew that he was waiting for her.

"Miss Alexander," He greeted as she stopped at his door and she offered him a tense smile, "I wasn't expecting to see you anywhere near a S.H.I.E.L.D building since you were forced to help two years ago."

"It wasn't a decision I made lightly," She replied easily, the barb not lost on her. "I've had a lot of time to think…"

"You're thinking about joining S.H.I.E.L.D?"

"No," Alice shook her head, answering with much more force than she had intended before clearing her throat and continuing calmer, "No, it's not that. I wanted to ask you about that day…August 2nd, 1986."

Fury looked at her and sighed softly, gesturing to the other side of his desk and frowning softly. "What would you like to know, Alice?"

"Why did you come back?" Her question must have confused him because his visible eye narrowed and she wasn't sure if he was genuinely not aware of what she'd meant or if he was forcing her to explain further. She decided that it was the former and she sighed, pulling her sweatshirt over her shoulders and showing him the scars that still resided on the inside of her arm that expressed her experimentation number. "Why did you come back to the lab…why did you help me?" When he didn't answer she returned her sweatshirt to its proper place and sliding her arm back into the sleeve.

"I'm not sure what you're looking to get out of this –"

"Closure," She answered quickly as she crossed her arms over her chest self-consciously. "I had hated you…hated what you stood for, for so long because I thought S.H.I.E.L.D was solely responsible for what happened to me in there. You'd been the one person I was forced to blame because the one man who put me in there wound up dead…and then you were the one who got me out…why?" Fury offered her a humorless smile.

"If you spent so much time hating me because of S.H.I.E.L.D, why're you here now?"

"Honestly?" When he nodded she offered him a tense smile, "the more time that passes the more I'm realizing that I can't hold grudges that are misplaced."

"The Weapon X Program…" He finally sighed after a lengthy silence his eyes meeting hers before he brought up the information on the computer across the office and nodding in direction towards it. "It was a clandestine government genetic research facility project conducted by the Canadian Government's Department K. I was working as a spy at the time and my cover was working for Department K as a…handler. They used reports of mutants as well as the communist ledger to pick people." He explained, watching as the woman returned her gaze to him rather the computer and he assumed it was to watch his expressions for any signs of dishonesty. Fury almost smirked at her, knowing that she would have made a great agent had her life not led her on the path it did. "I didn't know any of this at the time I was undercover and later found out that the program was capturing mutants and doing experiments on them to enhance their abilities or superpowers, turning them into weapons."

"I could have told you that," She muttered before raising her hand when he shot her an annoyed look, "I apologize…please, continue."

"I began questioning my orders. I had brought the information to my superiors believing that the information I collected would be used to shut the project down, but I was wrong. The United States Government had no intentions of stopping the program despite it being on foreign soil and Stoner, as I later found out he was working with HYDRA in an attempt at gaining favor and information against the remaining Howling Commandos. I went rouge." Fury sighed once more, watching as the woman in front of him twitched almost as if she wanted to say something, but refrained. "I was then approached by a CIA operative, James Howlett…I believe you know him as Wolverine…you mutants and your codenames."

"We've met."

"The program was being run by a man named John Kestrel…he went by John Wraith. Logan managed to bring me enough information that I was able to help. I managed to get back into the lab and that's when I let everyone loose. Logan and I dealt with Wraith and the other X-men were able to get the mutants out…except for one." He eyed her in that moment, the implication clear as to who he was speaking about. "We tried to go back for you, but when we got there we found nothing but bodies. When I tracked your history I hadn't thought you capable of man-slaughter."

"Well when you keep me in a cage for over twenty years constantly poking and prodding I get a little twitchy…" She remarked sardonically before her expression sobered, "Unfortunately, it wasn't my first instance."

Fury snorted on a laugh before offering her a nod, "So, I came to find out. After you went into hiding I had to use all of my old contacts to find you. I wanted you to know that while I couldn't erase my actions, I could at least do the next best thing and give you freedom."

Alice crossed her arms, "Yet you didn't, not really. You kept my file in your archives in the event that I'd pop up again."

"We found a hacker in S.H.I.E.L.D files I had _personally_ locked away," Fury explained gruffly, "I didn't know it was you, but when I figured it out I knew we had to find you. You were danger–"

"If you say dangerous, Fury, I swear to god I will throttle you." She snarled as she glared at him, once hazel eyes a burning cinnamon, "I was trying to be normal, and trying to go back to what I knew would help others because I happened to have more than a few decades of nursing under my belt." She frowned, "You may have had good intentions, Nick, but were your teams told to convey that same sentiment or were they merely instructed to bring me in by any means necessary?"

Fury's silence spoke volumes.

"I'm not asking for an apology. What I'm asking for is to understand the man I looked at as my nightmare for the last twenty-eight years."

"I don't know what you want me to say, Alexander."

"I'd like to think that in all my years my perception is not wrong…that my gut isn't wrong when it tells me that you're not a bad man...just a good man following bad orders, maybe even now."

"I'm not sure I understand your implications."

"You know _exactly_ what I'm talking about."

Fury sighed, "Rogers…"

"Fury, this isn't right and you know it isn't and pushing away good people is not a way to win their trust."

"I'll tell you the same thing I told Rogers," He frowned, "the last time I trusted anyone was the last time I lost an eye."

"You know I'm not as naïve as to believe that," When he scowled openly at her she shrugged, "I think you trust people who prove their worth to you, but you keep it close to the vest…how could you not when you're one of the best spies in the world who's run death off more times than not? I'm merely saying that if you want to get anywhere with Steve, you're going to have to let him do his job whether he's comfortable with it or not. He led a secret op group for the SSR for quite some time and he made hard calls…just as I imagine you've had to."

The man nearly cursed her perceptiveness watching as she studied him unwaveringly. She knew she was right and was merely trying to impart her wisdom to him and while it was borderline invasive she had plenty of experience to back herself up. Out of all of them, she knew Steve the best and knew what made him tic and he would be foolish to deny that small fact.

"What do you really want?"

"I want you to stop treating him like he's a tool," She stated with her voice unwavering. "Lord knows he's had enough of that when he joined up with the USO and later the SSR. For the entirety of Steve's career he's been a puppet on a string and no one likes to feel like that. I want you to stand up to things that are fundamentally wrong. I want you to make the tough calls and fight for your people instead of listening to big-wigs that get to sit pretty in ivory towers while the rest of us are kicking rocks in an effort to move mountains." She watched as the man's back became straight as if he was planning to rebuke her comments and she frowned deeply, "What I want is for the people not like us to know that they're safe, without the likes of us becoming easy scapegoats to disaster every time something goes wrong in the world. It happened in New York and I doubt that it'll stop there…You know this project is wrong…you tried and failed with the Tesseract. Do you truly believe that you'd have a better chance with our own technology? Because it's easier to understand? Alien technology or our own, I don't see that difference and I don't need to be a part of this operation to know that down to the foundation that this has trouble written all over it."

"We can stop wars before they even happen, we can –"

"At what cost?"

Her question was toned on patience, gentle yet sad and Fury almost reeled back as if she had smacked him. Alice watched as the emotions ran unrestrained across his face before he seemed to slam his walls back down.

"When I want your opinion, Alexander," Fury seemed to snap, "I will ask for it."

"I don't believe you have a choice in the matter." The spy seemed to glare a hole steadily into her hazel eyes and she ignored the discomfort she felt at holding his gaze, "You asked the question. I gave you my answer."

"And I don't believe that this is any of your concern."

"It absolutely becomes my concern when it comes to people I care about." She finally snapped her tone waspish, "I was an experiment for twenty years under the guise that it was all for good intentions only to find out that it was to stop a war before it started. To create _weapons_ under the belief or vague hope that they'll never be used. I am tired of people trying to prepare for war when there isn't one and leaving the innocents to clean up the messes left behind when things go wrong. I'm tired of seeing good men take bad orders."

Silence fell between them for what felt like a lifetime as emotions were rubbed and exposed like nerves to electricity. A tension fell around the office and neither occupant was willing to break the standoff that had begun. Fury wasn't sure when the conversation had taken such a nosedive, but he had ultimately assumed that she had ulterior motives for visiting him the same day Captain America found out about a project that had the potential to change the way they did things and for the better. Fury frowned as he looked at the woman across from him, so different from the wildly feral woman he had found hiding in the dilapidated warehouse on the banks of San Francisco back in the early '90s. The woman before him was no more stubborn than the woman he had sat across from two years before and forcing her to help them with the Tesseract and he allowed a small smile to flicker across his lips, the smile making the scars beneath his eyepatch wrinkle slightly and earning a quirked brow from the petite mutant.

"I think about what I saw back then more than I'd ever care to admit," He said finally. "Had I known you'd come back to literally haunt me…I would've tried to do somethin' sooner, maybe would've trusted you when you said that it would only bring out the darker side of humanity."

Alice blinked at his honesty before nodding slowly, not surprised that he seemed to want to change the subject and letting it go as she knew how to pick her battles. She had said everything she had wanted to regardless of Fury's opinion and she found herself feeling neither satisfied nor disappointed as she knew her opinion truly did mean little to the S.H.I.E.L.D director.

"I can accept that," she said finally.

The director nodded, though his gaze had become contemplative in the wake of their small argument. Alice knew that Nick Fury was an ambitious man and while he tried to hide it he certainly did care a lot about the protection of the people in the world. There was a kindness that she was beginning to see for the first time since meeting him and she knew she wasn't wrong when she had said that he was a good man. She could see that while he would never admit it, her words had taken root and that he would need to figure it out for himself and while she was never shy to say _I-told-you-so_ , she knew that it would not help in this kind of situation as she was forcing him to question quite a lot.

"Was that all you came here for, Miss Alexander?"

"I was in the area," She smirked as she fluffed her hair, content now to let him fully change the topic of their previous discussion. "Figured I'd stop by."

"I'll try to keep any dogs off your scent."

"That'd be wonderful," She offered him a genuine smile. "I'd like to think that perhaps we can move past all of this unpleasantness."

Fury chuckled, "Me too, Alexander…me too."

"Just do me a favor."

His brow arched as he shot her a deadpanned look, "And what would that be?"

"Try to put some trust in Rogers? You two are more alike than you'd probably believe."

"I'll see what I can do."

Alice smiled extending her hand and offering him a nod in acceptance, "I'll be seein' you around then."

"Take care of yourself Alice," He remarked, his tone more serious than she suspected it should have been for the moment, but took the tone in stride as he clasped his hand in hers. "And keep your eyes open."

"You can count on it."

Alice and Fury concluded their impromptu meeting before the man watched her leave his office and while he felt better for at least creating a cease-fire with the mutant, he knew that the worst was only yet to come.

**-0-**

A few days later found Alice pacing her living room thoughtfully as Ian and Dan nursed tea and coffee respectively. They were having their monthly meeting to see what goals they had met as well as set their next month's goals. Things at the ranch had been quiet if not peaceful with the exception of a few minor inconveniences in the form of a few men who liked to come out and harass her employees including any that identified as LGBTQ+. Dan had chased them off a few times with threats to involve police but it seemed they hadn't taken his threats seriously.

"I'm just worried, boss."

Ian glanced at the redheaded man before running a hand through his textured hair, the coils and curls tamed and shaped according to his preferred hairstyle and making his pretty features stand out. "I am too, Alice. I've gotten at least four complaints just this week about these guys."

Ian was a recent college grad much like Dan had been, and it had become apparent they knew each other well and had been close friends in school as they had interacted warmly with each other after Alice had hired them. Ian stood at a brilliant six feet and was model-esque in his beauty with strong features gifted to him by his parents who were both immigrants from Ghana. He had majored in business and accounting and Alice had quickly hired him after glancing briefly at his resume and portfolio. While Dan was in charge of hiring the other hands for the farm, Ian had also taken over the role of HR manager, signing Alice's name to paychecks and making sure everyone was properly accommodated based on his boss's wishes for the company.

Alice continued her pacing, glancing at the two as she did, "Do we have names for these guys or any pictures?"

"I'm sure if we went over the footage we'd be able to find more, but yeah we got a few names."

"Good. I want their images and I'll be keeping an eye out for them personally. Ian if you could draft up an email to send out to the employees and explain the situation, letting them know that if they are to see these guys causing problems they have my full permission to handle the situation as they see fit without disciplinary actions on my half. They won't be fired just because they stand up to them. And the ones who have come forward, let them know that if they need any time off it'll be approved with pay and without fear of unemployment. Use your discretion, I don't want anyone just willy-nilly taking advantage of the kindness though."

"I can make sure that happens."

"Dan," Alice turned and addressed the lanky man, "If these guys come back on site again I want you to grab me and then call the police. I'm not gonna tolerate some punks ruining something that's working towards strengthening the community and putting people in danger."

"Can do."

"Is there anything else that you guys can think of?"

Ian and Dan shared a look before looking back at the shorter woman, "We were actually wondering about you…"

"Me?"

"Yeah," Dan frowned as he took in her appearance, "You've been a little on edge the last few days or at least it seems…"

"It's alright," She raised a hand and stopped the arguments before they happened as the two employees lurched to correct her. "It's the anniversary…that's all. I'll be fine, just trying to keep my mind busy."

The two knew not to press further before sharing a look. After a moment Ian stood and offered the mutant a smile, "Look…if you need some time off just let us know…we'll take care of Rumsfeld and the farm easily enough."

"I know," Alice offered the two a genuine smile. "If I need time, you two will be the first to know."

"If you say so."

"And I do," She laughed as she pulled the taller man in for a hug before glancing at Dan as he stood awkwardly with his hands in his pockets, "You want in Danny or are you gonna miss the opportunity to get this close to Ian?"

"I hate you." The man blushed earning a giggle from the man, who was hopelessly in love with his gruff co-worker, before stepping forward and joining the hug briefly. They pulled apart and said their goodbyes and Alice watched from the porch as the two got in their cars and drove off. She sighed after a moment before frowning when she felt her phone go off in her pocket. Glancing down at the caller ID she saw Steve's name across the screen.

"Hey Steve!" She forced the smile onto her face despite the feeling of wanting to be alone for a moment. She called to her dog as she stepped back into the house and closed the door. "What's going on?"

" _Nick Fury is dead_."

Her mouth dropped open as her throat worked to come up with a reply. After a few moments of silence she managed to answer, "I'm so sorry, Steve…what happened?"

" _I don't have a lot of information at the moment, but…I'm heading back to the Triskelion and I think I left the stove on at home…_ "

At his words her mind went blank, immediately picking up on the phrase they had used in the 1940s with the Howling Commandos. It had been used to signal danger and she dove into the recesses of her mind to remember all of the phrases. She wasn't supposed to know them, but Bucky had taken time to explain them and so had Steve when they realized it would be beneficial for the one person able to patch them up to know what they were getting into or what to expect. It was apparent that Steve felt his phone may be tapped and she knew she would have to proceed with caution, "Were you making mom's pasta sauce or the curried cabbage?"

She sensed more than heard Steve's relief as he answered, " _Mom's pasta sauce. You know she always seemed to make it best when she'd make it with the meatballs._ "

"What'd she season them with again?" Alice played along, "We didn't have them when I was growing up, ya know?"

" _Garlic, onion, oregano, basil, rosemary, parsley and red pepper flakes..._ " Came his answer indicating that he had seven possible threats nearby, " _But she always loved to add a kick of heat with chili to them to really make you sweat. Can't tell you how many times the house would smell like it was on fire_."

S.H.I.E.L.D had been compromised, she surmised quickly and she forced herself to sound cheerful as she replied, "Your ma sounds like a real piece of work, Steve. How long would she keep them on for?"

" _You planning on making them?_ " The question was more to serve as a mode to keep the conversation sounding natural to others and when the codes were first made up it was to keep Steve as honest as possible. He had always been a horrible liar, even Bucky had managed to lie better than the patriot and that man wore emotions on his face like it was a film.

"Yeah, I'm tired of looking up recipes online and I'm hankering for something different."

She heard words being exchanged over the other line and she frowned softly as she tried to listen to them and it seemed as if Steve was allowing her to do the same as well. " _She'd leave 'em on for about 6 hours on low heat and then turn it up the last hour or so and bring them to a boil. Then she'd make the pasta and toss it all together_."

"I will certainly keep that in mind," She laughed, the code translating easily in her mind – _if_ _you don't hear from me in 6 hours be concerned, but if it goes longer I'm compromised and you should consider getting out of Dodge_. "You mind if I call you later and let you know how they turned out?"

" _I'd hate to miss out on our nightly routine._ " While the answer was genuine she also knew it would be to explain more than he was able to at that moment. " _I think I'm overthinking things…last night was a blur and I could really use a friend._ "

Alice stiffened, knowing that he was saying it for the sake of the conversation but not liking that it meant that her friend was in serious trouble. "I'll see if I can fit you into my schedule. I really am sorry about Nick, Steve…are they having a service for him?"

" _I'm not entirely sure._ " They needed the conversation to sound natural. " _I'll let you know when I find out more…I'm about to head in to see Secretary Pierce and then I'm heading home. Maybe I can wake up and this'll just be a bad dream_."

"I'm here if you need to talk, Steve…don't be a stranger."

" _I won't. Talk to ya soon._ "

They said their goodbyes and Alice frowned deeply before making her way to the television in her living room and turning it onto the news, her eyes flickering along the screen. She turned up the ringer on her phone and set it on the coffee table, not even blinking when Rumsfeld jumped onto the couch and settled in next to her, his large body spreading out and taking up the entirety of the surface. She absently pet his head and in between his ears as her eyes flicked up to look at the clock, noting that it was still early in the morning before turning her eyes back to the screen. The ranch was closed on Thursdays and Fridays and it was currently Friday so it allowed her employees a break, and gave Alice time to mindlessly work around her house and in the barn to clean up and keep things neat. Her mind ran through endless possibilities as she tried to reconcile with Fury's death. She had gone to see him earlier in the week, forgave him and now he was gone. It was a crude reminder as to how short people's lives were.

**-0-**

Steve was having a rough day and he couldn't help the annoyance that encircled around him in a vice grip. Natasha sat next to him, leg kicked up to rest on the dashboard of the truck he had hotwired. His mind strayed to the conversation that he had with Alice only a few hours before and he couldn't help but hope that she had truly understood how much trouble they were all in at the moment.

"Where did Captain America learn how to steal a car?"

He glanced at the redheaded spy before sighing, "Nazi Germany." Natasha hummed noncommittally and he glanced at her feet before snapping, "And we're _borrowing_. Take your feet off the dash."

The Russian glanced at him in amusement as she curled her feet off of the dashboard, readjusting herself so she could face him from the passenger seat, "Alright, I have a question for you, oh, which you do not have to answer. I feel like if you don't answer it though, you're kind of answering it, you know?"

"What?"

"Was that your first kiss since 1945?" She asked coyly and ignoring his waspish tone, her smile only widening when the patriot seemed flustered.

Steve sighed in embarrassment, "That bad, huh?"

"I didn't say that."

The patriot snorted, "Well, it kind of _sounds_ like that's what you're saying."

"No, I didn't. I just wondered how much practice you've had."

"You don't need practice."

"Everybody needs practice."

"It was _not_ my first kiss since 1945. I'm _ninety-five_ , I'm not _dead_."

Natasha almost laughed, but seeing the look on his face asked instead, "Nobody special, though?"

"Believe it or not, it's kind of hard to find someone with shared life experience." He chuckled.

Natasha hummed for a moment before glancing at him, "Not even Alice?"

"What about her?"

"Alice probably has more shared life experience with you than anyone else…why not Alice?"

Steve considered the question before glancing at the redhead, "No. As much as we share life experience and have a good friendship Alice is still in love with someone else." When her brow quirked he smiled sadly, though it came out more as a wince as he realized how the statement sounded. He and the mutant were close, but the last thing Steve thought of her was a potential romantic interest. He shook his head before answering the questioning look on the redhead's face, "Bucky…my friend from the war."

"The one that has that piece in the Smithsonian right…the one that died?"

"Yeah…besides I couldn't be that for Alice any more than she can be that for me."

Natasha watched him carefully before sighing softly, "Life experience, huh?"

"Yeah…"

"Well, that's alright," She chirped in an effort to add light back into the conversation, "You just make something up."

"What, like you?"

"I don't know." She sighed, allowing the cheery attitude to fall in favor of the more serious tone, "The truth is a matter of circumstances. It's not all things to all people all the time. And neither am I."

Steve frowned, "That's a tough way to live."

"It's a good way not to die, though."

Steve considered the spy's statement for a moment before sighing. It was hard to get to know a woman that didn't want to allow someone to get to know her and he desperately wanted to understand the spy. She, other than Alice, had been one of the few constants in his life and while he knew he had been frustrated with S.H.I.E.L.D, Natasha had given it all up to help him and he couldn't help but wonder why. Alice had implored him to try with the Russian, to let things happen naturally and while the woman had the insufferable tendency to constantly suggest a date to him or to crack a joke about his experience with modern things, he found that he would be bored without her around. Glancing at the redhead beside him he took in her now closed off features as if putting up a mask would prevent him from reading her – something that Natasha was quite good at was deflecting and that included her emotions – and it was something that Alice also did and because of that he was able to pick the trait out easily enough. He considered the time he had worked with Natasha and found that not once did she ever do anything with the thought of acting selfishly. She was cavalier and willing to throw herself into whatever situation she had to for the better of the job and she was creative when things didn't seem to go her way and that translated into her friendships and the one main relationship he could think of was the one she had with Alice. The mutant had been trying, _desperately_ , to forge relationships within the last two years and for all her trying only seemed to latch onto himself, Clint and Natasha – something he found strange considering how well she had gotten along with both Tony and Bruce, but they were the ones that she seemed to put the most effort into. If Alice could see something in Natasha that wasn't obvious to many others, he decided to heed her intuition and give the woman a chance as there were a growing number of people he _couldn't_ trust.

With these thoughts in mind, the patriot glanced at the woman once more, his brow quirked and a small smile twitching at the corner of his lips in an effort to change the tone of the previous conversation. "You know, it's kind of hard to trust someone when you don't know who that someone really is."

"Yeah," She questioned as she looked to him once more, "Who do you want me to be?"

"How about a friend?"

She laughed softly, her eyes returning to the road before them once more, "Well, there's a chance you might be in the wrong business, Rogers."

"Maybe," He agreed after a moment before glancing at her once more, "Alice seemed to think you could have both though."

Natasha scoffed quietly, "She's way more of an optimist than I am."

"She's not at all, actually." Steve said with a small sigh, "Alice is realistic and she draws from experience. She may not be the best fighter or even the best at maintaining friendships, but she's intuitive and she knows how people are. Maybe that makes her optimistic, but the reality is Alice is…"

"Lonely," Natasha nodded slowly, "lonely, fatalistic…but trusting."

The patriot shook his head, "She's a good actress then." When the spy's brow quirked in a questioning arch, he offered her a small laugh, "Alice doesn't trust easily. She's spent her whole life hiding who and what she is and has learned from countless mistakes in regards to both. During World War II she admittedly didn't trust me at all, but showed a certain respect merely because I was a Captain – even more so she barely trusted me to keep the Commandos safe and she was right in that respect. I pushed too hard…was too careless…I was looking for the next fight because I wanted to be able to do something to help others and because of that I put us in unnecessary danger and that got my friend and her sweetheart killed. It took a lot of work for the two of us to become close, but the last thing I'd describe Alice as is trusting."

The spy found she had no argument for that assessment and it was true that Steve arguably knew her best, but Natasha wasn't fully convinced. As she had been about to speak, the GPS she had been using began beeping as they came to an abandoned Army base. Steve stopped the car and frowned at the structures beyond and turned the key in the ignition, the two Avengers stepping out of the vehicle and the spy glancing at her device once more. "This is it."

"The file came from these coordinates."

"So did I," He muttered before following the woman into the abandoned Army base. "This camp is where I was trained."

"Changed much?" She questioned as she looked around, ignoring his muttered answer as she sighed in frustration. "This is a dead end. Zero heat signature, zero waves, not even radio. Whoever wrote the file must have used a router to throw people off." She glanced back at the patriot to see him looking off in the distance, "What is it?"

"Army regulations forbid storing ammunition within five hundred yards of the barracks." He informed her as they stopped in front of the small structure, "This building is in the wrong place." He motioned for Natasha to step back and he spied the lock for a moment before hitting the latch with his shield, picking the lock off after it broke and opening the door for the two of them. Lights flickered to life and exposing what appeared to be an office-like setting as the two of them stopped in the middle of the room.

Natasha frowned, "This is _S.H.I.E.L.D_."

"Maybe where it started," Steve nodded as they continued on and soon finding themselves in another room where on the wall before them were three pictures still hanging perfectly on the walls.

"There's Stark's father."

"Howard," He nodded.

Her eyes then strayed to the only woman in the lineup, her pretty features staring back at them, "Who's the girl?" She glanced at Steve to see the longsuffering look take over his features and Natasha immediately understood his earlier reluctance to consider Alice as a potential partner. He was in love with the woman in the picture. She watched as he turned away and she trailed after him, her eyes sweeping over the empty shelves before coming to a stop next to Steve when he began pushing at a row of shelves.

"If you're already working in a secret office…" He grunted as he finally managed to get the wall to move, exposing the doors just beyond, "Why do you need to hide the elevator?"

Natasha shrugged before moving forward and noticing the keypad she pulled out her device once more, tapping a few buttons before holding it up to the pad. After exposing the code, she tapped the appropriate numbers and the elevator doors opened with a soft _ding_. Steve's brow furrowed inquisitively and the Russian offered him another shrug, "Alice developed a setting on my phone that can crack codes by picking up on the oil deposits left over from fingers."

"You're kidding?"

"Nope," Natasha smirked, "we haven't been able to test it before now. She'll be happy to know it worked…maybe something she'd install into our gear if the Avengers ever begin to avenge again."

Steve's mind immediately flashed back to two years before when she had lectured him about paying attention to her while cracking certain codes on the helicarrier. It had been when they had been breaking into the store rooms in an effort to find out what S.H.I.E.L.D was planning to do with the Tesseract, finding the phase two blasters not long afterward. He shook his head as the two stepped into the elevator and rode it down in silence. After a few moments the elevator finally came to a stop and opened to show a darkened room beyond. As soon as they stepped out, lights flickered on showing a room filled with nothing but computers and the two approached the center console.

"This can't be the data-point," Natasha frowned, "this technology is ancient." She glanced at the dashboard and frowned when she noticed a more modern looking drive port and removed the flash drive that Fury had left to Steve from her pocket before inserting it. The two waited as the computers in the room whirled to life and she returned her eyes to the main computer as it beeped.

" _Initiate system?_ "

"Y-E-S, spells yes," She commented as she typed, a smile twitching at her full lips as the computer booted up. "Shall we play a game?" She quoted in a raspy voice as she imitated Joshua/WOPR from _WarGames_. When the patriot didn't comment to the reference she opened her mouth to explain, "It's from a movie that…"

"Yeah, I saw it. Alice made me…" He frowned, his posture tensing when the computer spoke suddenly.

" _Rogers, Steven. Born, 1918. Romanoff, Natalia Alianovna. Born, 1984_."

Natasha's eyes scanned over the screens finding one that had a green silhouette and almost looked as if it was watching them. "It's some kind of recording?"

" _I am not a recording, Fräulein. I may not be the man I was when the Captain took me prisoner in 1945, but I am_."

On another monitor, staring back at them was a picture of Arnim Zola and Natasha turned her eyes to the patriot to see the angered furrow to his brow.

"Do you know this thing?"

Steve frowned, stepping off of the platform and looking around, "Arnim Zola was a German scientist who worked for the Red Skull." He informed almost dismissively, "He's been dead for years."

" _First correction, I am Swiss_ ," The voice snapped before continuing, " _Second, look around you. I have never been more alive. In 1972 I received a terminal diagnosis. Science could not save my body, my mind, however, that was worth saving on two hundred thousand feet of data banks. You are standing in my brain_." Steve had come to stand next to Natasha once more, his eyes narrowing on the screen.

"How'd you get here?"

" _I was invited_." The digitized scientist seemed to laugh. Natasha ignored it as she looked at Steve.

"It was Operation Paperclip after World War II. S.H.I.E.L.D recruited German scientists with strategic value."

" _They thought I could help their cause_." Zola hummed, " _I also helped my own_."

Steve glared at the monitor, "HYDRA died with the Red Skull."

" _Cut off one head, two more shall take its place."_

"Prove it."

" _Accessing archive_." The computer screens flashed to show footage of Red Skull and of the S.H.I.E.L.D founders. " _HYDRA was founded on the belief that humanity could not be trusted with its own freedom._ " The digital Zola explained as they were shown different flashes throughout history." _What we did not realize, was that if you try to take that freedom, they resist. The war taught us much. Humanity needed to surrender its freedom willingly. After the war, S.H.I.E.L.D was founded and I was recruited. The new HYDRA grew a beautiful parasite inside S.H.I.E.L.D. For seventy years HYDRA has been secretly feeding crisis, reaping war. And when history did not cooperate, history was changed_."

Natasha shook her head, "That's impossible. S.H.I.E.L.D would have stopped you."

" _Accidents will happen_ …" The computer monitor stopped to show them the night Howard and Maria Stark had been killed, showing the many mutants being shoved into small cubical-like cells including a face they both recognized as Alice's before the images flickered once more and showing that HYDRA had been behind Fury's recent death, " _HYDRA created a world so chaotic that humanity is finally ready to sacrifice its freedom to gain its security. Once the purification process is complete, HYDRA's new world order will arise. We won, Captain. Your death amounts to the same as your Life; a zero sum_." Anger suddenly flooded to life in Steve's body and he slammed his fist into the monitor. There was brief silence before Zola's digital presence was transferred to the next monitor, " _As I was saying_ …"

"What's on this drive?" Steve snapped as he glared at the computer. The scientist only scoffed.

" _Project Insight requires insight. So I wrote an algorithm._ "

Natasha's eyes widened, "What kind of algorithm? What does it do?"

" _The answer to your question is fascinating. Unfortunately, you shall be too dead to hear it_." The doors that led to any type of exit slammed shut and the two Avengers jumped as if ready for a fight before Steve's glare returned to the monitor that showed Zola's smug expression.

"Alice was right back then in 1945…I should've killed you when I first captured you."

" _It seems as if you will never get the chance_."

Finding no exits the Russian pulled out her device, her eyes widening after hitting a few buttons, her green eyes narrowed on the screen in her hand, "Steve, we got a bogey. Short range ballistic. 30 seconds tops."

"Who fired it?" He took in her panicked expression and frowned when she breathed the name of the organization the two of them were currently employed by: S.H.I.E.L.D. Steve snapped is gaze back to the computer as it began to speak once more.

" _I am afraid I have been stalling, Captain. Admit it, it's better this way. We're both of us...out of time, though do send my regards to Fräulein Alexander – we'll be seeing her soon_."

Steve looked around before noticing a grate system in the floor and motioned for Natasha to follow him, the two nearly stumbling as the missile made contact with the building, fire licking at their heels as he forced Natasha to jump, the patriot following immediately after and raising his shield in an effort to keep them covered. It was in that moment, as debris piled around them and entombed them, that thought back to his and Alice's talk in her car when she had stated that she was not wrong to distrust S.H.I.E.L.D and he cursed himself for not listening to the mutant's warnings sooner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** Ehehehehehe...please don't hate me lmao.
> 
> Lotsa stuff here, but it's still the early stages. I wanted to highlight some time between Steve and Nat because...Romanogers (or NatCap as I call them) is LYFEEEE! I stan them and I'm still toying with the idea of making this a second pairing to the story. Lemme know what y'all think about that, I'm always open to opinions lol.
> 
> Also, expect there to many a flashback in the next few chapters as we get acquainted with Alice/Bucky ;)
> 
> Regardless, I also wanted to add bits of what Alice has accomplished in the two years since the first Avengers movie because she has grown a bit and as far as her role within the team, I want her to be able to stick out without merely being just an add on, ya know what I mean? Also the code that she and Steve used...It's completely made up and I spent HOURS looking into actual codes used during WWII and couldn't make it fit into the story in the way that I wanted it to. During WWII the United States employed many Native Americans to use their language to both send codes and to teach other allies their codes because they knew for a fact that the axis powers wouldn't be able to interpret the language. It was a fool proof way to prevent their messages such as troop movements or naval carriers from being intercepted or taken by surprise. Despite maybe the Howling Commandos learning these same codes, I felt as if t would be rough for a bunch of guys who were very white (with the exception of Gabe Jones and Jim Morita) to learn an entire language that was already incredibly hard to learn and decided to make my own. I tried to add translations in as much as possible, but I'm sure anything I missed can be figured out easily enough :)
> 
> Anyway, next chapter we get to meet Sam - easily my favorite MCU character besides Tony and Thor - because Anthony Mackie is absolute bae...other than Sebastian, but let's be honest the MCU has some of the most attractive people in all of Hollywood...it's hard to keep a running list.
> 
> I'm excited to be bringing Bucky in...which should be happening very soon, I promise! Thanks again for reading and I'll hopefully see you in the next chapter!
> 
> With love and adoration (because you deserve it),
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	12. Bad Moon Rising

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_12_

* * *

**** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER THREATENING BEHAVIOR AND HOMOPHOBIC SLURS IN REGARDS TO THE LGBTQ+ COMMUNITY AS WELL AS HARMFUL LANGUAGE. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ****

* * *

Steve had pulled both he and Natasha out of the rubble and remains of the original S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters and the two Avengers had been silent ever since. It had taken some doing, but Steve had eventually managed to find another car to hotwire as Natasha was clearly in no condition to trek their way back to Washington from New Jersey. The ride had left them both to their thoughts, but one question seemed to circulate the most.

"Where do we go now?"

"We could call Alice."

Steve glanced at the Russian to see that while she had made the suggestion to go to the mutant she hadn't wanted to inconvenience her. Natasha was nearly as protective of the mutant as he was in most cases and it had bothered the both of them that the computerized Zola had pictured her and mentioned her so specifically. After a few moments of managing his scattered thoughts he shook his head, "No…they'll be watching her…besides she's out. Finally out and I can't drag her back in."

"You're just afraid she's going to tell you _I-told-you-so_." Natasha attempted the joke and groaned softly. "Do you have any other ideas? I'm fresh out…"

Natasha had taken some of the rubble to her head despite the patriot doing his best to cover the both of them, he hadn't been able to shield them completely and the spy had taken the brunt of it. Steve thought long about who they could turn to and he frowned softly. "I have one…if he opens the door, anyway." He ignored when the Russian sent him an inquisitive look and focused his eyes on the road before them. They drove through the night, giving Natasha time to recover slightly before they were abandoning the car in the morning and heading to a location only Steve seemed to know about before knocking on the door. A few moments later a man Natasha had recognized as the man that Steve had been speaking to the morning she had picked him up was looking at them with brows arched in question.

"Hey man?"

"I'm sorry about this," Steve breathed as Natasha looked around in an effort to see if they had been followed. "We need a place to lay low."

Natasha snorted derisively before bluntly stating, "Everyone we know is trying to kill us."

Sam glanced back and forth between the two dirt-smudged Avengers and shook his head, "Not everyone." He pushed the door opened and held it while they stepped through before he closed the door and closed the blinds. He directed them to the back of his house where his guest room was located before glancing at them over his shoulder, "You guys are welcome to use the bathroom in here, and there's another just down the hall. Also, there's a first aid kit under the sink if you need it." His gazed bounced between the two of them before he sighed slightly and leaving the two heroes to begin getting themselves cleaned up.

Natasha wasted no time in moving into the room and closing the door so she could shower quickly, the patriot taking time to look around the room - ignoring the sounds of Sam muttering to himself in the kitchen where pots and pans were being moved about. He took the time to consider what they had learned so far and he couldn't help as his mind continually circled back to Zola's taunts. Why hadn't Steve thought about HYDRA before hand? Why hadn't he considered the much used mantle that the organization had been known for even during the War?

_Cut off one head and two more shall take it's place_.

He hadn't thought about that saying before hand because while Steve had worked for the SSR, the last thing he was was a spy. It was something he had never considered because, at the time, it didn't apply to his job description and he had other things to worry about and all of them included the Commandos and Bucky. His mind suddenly took a detour as he remembered his friend. He could remember that day on the train as it was a reoccuring nightmare that haunted him even in his waking hours - something that Alice had quickly learned when he had stayed with her in Boston.

**-0-**

_"I fell that day too," He sighed as he leaned back into the couch, his eyes puffy and red from crying and constantly rubbing them. Alice rubbed her fingers with practiced movements along his temples to ease the headache that had settled behind his eyes, her fingers carding through his cropped hair and scratching along his scalp from where she had wedged herself between him and the arm of the couch and allowing him to lean fully into her side._

_He had woken from a night terror and hadn't been able to return to the mutant's guestroom in fear of the shadows that seemed to taunt him from every angle on the walls. He could still hear Buck's scream as he fell from the train and the echo of it rattled against his chest. Alice seemed to have a six-sense when it came to him - he had noticed offhandedly and early on in his stay - and she tended to know when he was awake or reliving something from his past. She had told him after the first night of him waking up violently in a cold sweat screaming that she had experienced it too, after the war. PTSD had settled in quickly since the Battle of New York and with the flashing images of aliens and modern warfare came the images of his time overseas. It hadn't been something he had been prepared for. He had been out of the ice for **weeks** and he hadn't had a single dream about his time nor did he feel any anxiousness or fear, perhaps it was because he had been so grossly overwhelmed with everything else that he hadn't had time to think about it._

_"Do you want to talk about it?"_

_He was pulled from his thoughts at the soft and edgy alto of her voice and he looked up at her. She was wearing a pair of sweatpants and a large, men's henley with her hair mussed from sleep and standing away from her head as if being pulled by unknown forces - her eyes were alert, however, and her lips had thinned in concern. Steve sighed softly, shifting so his head lay in a more comfortable position against her shoulder - perhaps this was too intimate, but the night before she had actually slept in his room, curled against him in an effort to chase away her own nightmares - before sighing softly through his slightly clogged nose, "I...I don't know."_

_"Take your time," She offered, releasing her lips and offering him a comforting smile. He watched the expression fall, his eyes closing slightly as she scratched his behind his ear. Alice continued her ministrations without pause. She seemed to know that he needed someone real to cling to and she shifted slightly, fixing his arm that had been tossed over her stomach into a more comfortable position before kneading his hand gently and lightly hitting the pressure points in his hand. While that was uncomfortable, it helped ground him more and more and he was thankful for it._

_"I tried..." He began around a shaky breath, "I tried to reach for him...to catch him, but I lost my footing." Alice's nails scraped across his scalp at the top of his head and he shivered slightly, his voice wavering and watery. "It was that stupid misstep on my part that made Bucky fall...I had nearly had him, but because I lost my footing, I had to grab onto the train to adjust and then he was gone..."_

_"It's okay, Steve."_

_"No it's not," He sniffled, burying his face into her shoulder. "It's not okay because it was my fault."_

_She was silent for a time, the only sound filling the apartment was the patriot's cries and the car horns that blared outside of the window. She digested what he was saying, allowing him the moment to cry and to sort through his feelings. When his sobs slowly ceased she readjusted and the patriot let her go, but just as he was about to move away from her, she grabbed him her hands resting against his cheeks and if the situation had been different he perhaps would have seen the movement as grossly intimate as he was half positioned on top of her._

_"You listen here and you listen well, Steve." She began, her eyes flickering between his as her thumbs chased the trail of tears away from his blotchy cheeks, "That mission...that mission was going to happen regardless of what power you had over it. You guys fought the equivalent of a human tank and that **isn't on you**. Bucky knew what the mission entailed, perhaps better than the both of us. But don't you dare think for a second that he blamed you for **anything** or that_ **_I_** _blame you for that matter_. _You two were hanging off of a train going faster than any vehicle should be traveling during that time on a piece of metal that was barely holding together after the blast."_

_"How'd..."_

_"I read your report," She admitted softly, her fingers continuing to move the tears away from his face, "I also read everyone's report...we said awful things to each other and I'm so, so sorry for not doing right by you before Steve." She offered him a weak smile, "I can at least apologize to you...I'll never get the chance to apologize to Bucky, but I don't wish it had been you that fell...It's our job now to live for him."_

_Steve snorted slightly, his eyes turning away from her, "I just resent that I saved myself..."_

_"Even if you had fallen and Bucky survived," She began her tone slightly forceful, "we all wouldn't have lived long enough for a happily ever after. Red Skull would've blown everyone to hell and the only survivors would've been his cult following...I think I prefer the way things turned out...but say for arguments sake that the Commandos, without you, would've stopped Red Skull...Bucky would've eventually lost us both and I would've lost him to old age...things happen in life for a reason, Steve, and it's something that was extremely hard to learn. But I promise you...things get easier. Acknowledge how you feel and give yourself time to grieve and to move on if necessary. Honor him, by continuing to live."_

**-0-**

He sighed softly at the memory before listening as Natasha began moving around the room, a towel over her shoulders to prevent her hair from dripping water onto her outfit. She looked better, albeit still paler than normal, but overall she looked more alive. She offered him a distracted smile before gesturing to the bathroom, "It's all yours."

"Thanks, Nat."

She nodded and moved away from him seating herself on the bed just beyond the bathroom, her gaze distant as she continued to dry off. Steve decided that he didn't need a full shower like Natasha seemed to have wanted, and instead turned on the faucet and began washing his face. After scrubbing away the dirt, he continued to splash water onto his face in an effort to chase away the darker thoughts that were beginning to take root and that included the old memory of finding Bucky on Zola's experimentation table back in Austria. He glanced up into the mirror, his eyes catching Natasha's still form as she mindlessly continued through mechanical movements set by some routine he wasn't privy to.

"You okay?" Steve asked as he leaned on the doorframe, watching the sad and thoughtful expression on the Russian's face. Her reply was small, unlike her as she mumbled an affirmative, her hand working a towel through the ends of her curling hair. He sighed softly before stepping forward and sitting in front of her, preventing her from running away from him. "What's going on?"

She was quiet for a few moments, her hands still working through her hair before she allowed her gaze to meet his and her heart shuddered in her chest at the intensity she saw in the patriot's blue gaze. "When I first joined S.H.I.E.L.D, I thought I was going straight. But I guess I just traded the KGB for HYDRA." She remarked with a humorless chuckle before her eyes became faraway once again. "I thought I knew whose lies I was telling, but…I guess I can't tell the difference anymore."

"There's a chance you might be in the wrong business," He remarked with a small smile that earned him a faint one in reply. It was silent between them for a few moments before Natasha discarded the towel she had been using and returning her sharp gaze to the patriot.

"I owe you."

He shook his head, "It's okay."

"If it was the other way around, and it was down to me to save your life - and you _be honest_ with me," She began her heart beating an uneven rhythm in her chest as she searched the blue of his eyes, "would you trust me to do it?"

"I would now," He answered immediately before offering her a smile, "And I'm _always_ honest."

"Well, you seem pretty chipper for someone who just found out they died for nothing."

"Well, I guess I just like to know who I'm fighting."

The two were interrupted by a small knocking on the side of the door frame where Sam stood, regarding the two of them for a moment, "I made breakfast…if you guys, uh, eat that sort of thing."

Steve offered the man a smile and a nod as he turned to leave and the patriot looked at the other Avenger carefully, "Your call."

"I'm with you." She replied instantly, allowing him to stand before passing him down the hall and into the kitchen where Sam was idly munching on his breakfast. The three fell into a companionable silence before the two Avengers decided it was time to break down their situation and Natasha turned to look at the patriot. "So, the question is: who in S.H.I.E.L.D could launch a domestic missile strike?"

Steve scoffed quietly, "Pierce."

"Who happens to be sitting on top of the most secure building in the world."

"But he's not working alone," Steve frowned as he crossed his arms, "Zola's algorithm was on the _Lemurian Star_."

Natasha seemed to immediately put the puzzle pieces together as she stopped her pacing and turned so she could look at the seated patriot, "So was Jasper Sitwell."

"Shit," Steve cursed after a moment and earning him looks from both occupants in the room before he ran a hand down his face, "sorry, it's just something Alice mentioned."

"What was that?"

He leaned back on his seat, his fingers drumming a nameless beat, "She said that it seemed odd that Sitwell had such a high level clearance for _Insight_ considering he's a tech guy."

"Well," The redhead nodded, brushing a stray strand of hair from her face and crossing her arms from where she was leaned against the counter, "she's not wrong. It's why Fury sent me with you to begin with. He didn't understand why Sitwell was even on the ship and why his clearance had been raised to level 7." When the patriot shot her an apologetic look she waved it away, "I was sent to recover anything with S.H.I.E.L.D's signature – the pirates were merely an excuse to send us in and keep the Strike team busy while I looked into the situation. I downloaded everything to the flash drive and was told to give it directly to Fury as soon as we returned…I'm sorry I wasn't able to tell you beforehand, but considering everything that's happened in the last few days, I'm willing to break a few rules." She smirked and sent him a wink that had the patriot's face coloring red though whether he was embarrassed or not the former spy could only guess.

After a moment he cleared his throat, his blue eyes narrowing as he steered the conversation back on track, "So, the real question is: how do the two most wanted people in Washington kidnap a S.H.I.E.L.D officer in broad daylight?"

Sam cleared his throat as his eyes darted between the two standing and grabbing something off of the counter behind him and across from both Steve and Natasha – the two heroes ignoring the movement for Sam merely putting his dishes in the sink. He had pulled the file out when the two had gotten themselves straightened up and while he had finished breakfast, toying with the edges before making a decision. He had never been so sure of anything until that very moment, "The answer is," He dropped a file on the table in front of them, " _you_ don't."

Natasha's eyes were questioning as she immediately looked at the photo lying atop the file. "Is this Bakhmala? The Khalid Khandil mission…that was you?" When Sam nodded she glanced back at the patriot, "You didn't say he was Pararescue."

Steve took in the photo before looking up at the veteran, "Is this Riley?"

"Yeah."

"I heard they couldn't bring in the choppers because of the RPGs…what did you use stealth chute?"

Sam chuckled, "No. These."

The file was grabbed by Steve who opened it and began glancing it over, his eyes flickering back to the man and smirking with humor, "I thought you said you were a pilot."

"I never said pilot," He returned with a laugh. He watched as Steve looked through the file before dropping it back on the table with a deep sigh.

"I can't ask you to do this, Sam. You got out for a good reason."

" _Dude_ , Captain America needs _my_ help." He smirked, "There's no better reason to get back in."

It was silent for a few moments before Steve finally sighed, looking up at the man with a determined look, "Where can we get our hands on one of these things?"

"The last one is at Fort Meade," Sam answered instantly, "behind three guarded gates and a twelve-inch steel wall."

Steve glanced at Natasha who shrugged as if suggesting it was doable and the patriot's brow arched before smiling at the newest addition to the team, "Shouldn't be a problem."

"I've got just the person in mind and you're not gonna like it," Natasha said immediately and sending the patriot a significant look. Steve sighed, shaking his head.

"Nat, no."

"She's the best option we've got and she's the only one who can work off-grid right now." Natasha pushed her eyes pleading. "Alice will know how to make this happen."

"Is she cute?"

The two shot the former Pararescuer a look that had him raising his hands in surrender before Steve finally sighed.

"Fine."

"I'll...uh, go start up the car," Sam intoned before disappearing before they could change their minds.

**-0-**

Alice sighed as she walked the two horses out toward the pasture after her lesson and their wipe down to give the animals time to relax and graze before she would have to bring them in for the day. She hadn't heard from Steve in over a day and she was beginning to grow desperately worried. As she removed the horse's leads she reached into her back pocket and removed her phone, tapping the button on the side and watching as the screen lit up and showing she had no text messages or missed calls and she scowled as she shoved the device back into her pocket. If this is what retirement felt like, the mutant didn't want any part of it. The worry alone was driving her insane especially since Steve attracted trouble like a beacon.

"Miss Alexander!"

She turned sharply as she closed the gate to the pasture before frowning as one of her other employees came sprinting up to her. "Sean, what's the matter?"

Before the question was fully out of her mouth the teen sputtered on his breath and was already speaking, "Those guys're back and they're picking fights. Dan is tryin'a stop the mess, but he sent me to come get'cha."

"Get the cops on the phone and don't you let them off the hook until they say they're sendin' someone." She snapped, though thankfully the teen knew it wasn't at him, before she started jogging back to the main area where a line of cars had been pulling up. A large man stood at one of the trucks, pushing on Dan's chest with a smirk curling his lips as he egged him on. Dan snapped something at the man and was suddenly on the ground as the man threw the first punch. Alice wasted no time in running up to the scene her anger blazing as she leaned down to help Dan up, "What in the hell is goin' on here!?"

"This faggot son of a bitch is damn right disrespectful. I'm a customer and he should be fired!"

Dan looked about ready to fight the man again despite the blood running down from his nose and Alice stopped him, keeping her arm across his body and preventing him from moving, "Go get cleaned up."

"But Boss!"

" _Now_." She barked as the man stared at her. After a moment Dan shook out his hands and turned, quickly being ushered away by a worried Ian and Alice turned her attention back to the man. "From what I hear and _saw_ Mister, you're not exactly innocent either."

The man stood nearly a foot taller than her and seemed to look at her like she had gone crazy. "I want the owner of this place."

"I _am_ the owner of this place," She snapped. "And I don't take kindly to you fellas comin' around here and taking pot shots _or_ swings at my employees. Now what I suggest you do, is get back in your overly-supped up truck, drive away and don't ever come back."

The man glanced around at the others gathered and snickered, his eyes taking in her smaller form with a lecherous smile. "And what're you gonna do? You take in every fuckin' stray here in Winchester...every fag, every dyke an' every mongrel in between...and you think you can just sit here like a smug little _cunt_." She offered him a humorless smile when he shoved her shoulder slightly and she looked back up at him from underneath her baseball cap, her eyes flashing dangerously.

"I suggest you don't put your hands on me again, sir."

"An' what're you gonna do about it!?" He released a bellowing laugh as he shoved her shoulder again.

From across the lot Sam, Natasha and Steve had pulled up to see the commotion and the patriot was out of the car faster than Sam could stop the vehicle. Natasha was quick to follow after him and stopped Steve from charging forward with an arm across his waist, watching the situation with careful eyes.

"Nat!"

"Hang on there soldier..." She ignored the warning in the patriot's tone and ignoring when Sam stepped up next to them just as the larger man continued to shove the smaller woman's shoulder and it wasn't until he seemed to grab at her necklace and rip it off of her neck and step on it that the woman planned to do anything. Faster than any of them could blink she had kicked him in the knee, before punching him in the nose and grabbing him between the legs as she backed him into the truck behind him.

"Now you listen here and you listen good you _shickenkit son of a bitch_ ," She snarled as her hazel eyes blazed molten cinnamon, her left hand clenching dangerously around his crotch as her right hand flexed, ready to strike or block if necessary. "These balls o' yours belong to me…makes you my bitch don't it?" She seemed to roar in the silence that echoed throughout the crowd with the exception of a barking laugh from a man on the front stoop of her house that was nursing a bloody nose. "You come around here or harass _any_ of my employees again and I will make you wish you had never become a parasite in your mama's uterus before cursin' us with your existence. Get. The. _Fuck_. Off. My ranch and don't you _ever_ come back." The man throughout the entire time she held him whimpered, her hand squeezing unapologetically against his manhood before she gave one final squeeze and pushing him back into his car with more force than Steve had ever seen her use.

After releasing him, the man scrambled into the truck before tearing down the long drive in a cloud of smoke to the sound of sirens echoing in the distance. One squad car chased after the truck and the other made its way down the drive. Alice turned her eyes to the crowd before her gaze settled on Steve, Natasha and, it seemed, a new friend. She nodded to the house and the three seemed to scramble to get inside before the squad car could make them. She sighed as she looked around at the employees that had gathered around the area before addressing them.

"After the officers question you about what happened you all are free to go home. You'll still be compensated for the day and we'll be closing down for a few days just to recuperate. You'll be paid during this time and it will not affect your sick days or PTO. Make sure whatever else you need to finish is done and then head on home. I'll have Dan or Ian reach out to you when we're all good to come back."

She heard her employees murmuring to themselves as the officers stepped out of the car and she sighed as she bent down to grab her necklace out of the dirt, glancing at the broken chain sadly and thumbing the pendant as the officers stopped in front of her.

**-0-**

It was a few hours before Alice was able to return to her house. She had wanted to make sure everyone had left and that all the chores for the evening were taken care of before she made her way back into the house, but most importantly she had been trying to stem her anger with no such luck. As she entered her home she patted Rumsfeld on the head before turning; sitting in her living room awkwardly was Steve, Natasha and an unknown man. She took a moment to take in his appearance and couldn't deny he was handsome. He stood taller than her (as everyone in her life seemed to) with a decent build to him; kind brown eyes peered back at her from a handsome face and dark skin, with trimmed facial hair that formed a goatee around his mouth and adding dimension to his high and prominent cheekbones. He wore a faded sage green t-shirt and light wash jeans hung from his narrow hips, the light color of each article rich and made the darkness in his skin stand out. Her eyes then circled the room before landing on Steve in which she threw the nearest coffee coaster at him.

"Alice!"

"Steven Grant Rogers you have approximately 60 seconds to tell me why you thought it'd be a great idea to not call me after tellin' me S.H.I.E.L.D was down!"

The patriot sputtered, forgetting that she knew his full name and ignoring the amused and worried faces of Natasha and Sam respectively as he rushed to explain. "I didn't have time to call and I thought I was being tracked and monitored!" Her nostrils flared and her hand tightened around her charm which immediately drew his eyes to the lack of necklace around her neck, the chain hanging limply from where it was clenched in her fist. "Alice, what was _that_!?" When she snorted he frowned, "I've never seen you act like that to anyone."

"He was an asshole who needed to be reminded a little common decency." She answered sharply before her eyes narrowed back on the other man who stood silently as if afraid to move, "And who're you?"

"Um…Sam Wilson."

"Alice Alexander, nice to meet you." She grumped before her eyes turned to Natasha, "And your story?"

"On the run because I'm helping Steve."

The fire seemed to drain from her body and left her posture slouched, her hands clenching the top of the loveseat she had been standing behind, the cushions folding under her grip as if she didn't have the strength to stand on her own and Steve knew it was safe to approach her. His eyes watched as she her fingers immediately worked the charm around her hand, a nervous habit he knew her to have, after she released the cushion from her grip. He didn't dare touch the charm but he took her fist and gently pried her fingers from around the metal disk to see that it hadn't been broken and he sighed in relief. That charm was the only thing Alice really had of Bucky and it had become something for not only her but for him as well. After a few moments of silence, Alice motioned for them to step into the kitchen where she began making coffee in a pot on the counter and grumbling to herself after putting the charm on the table. Natasha stood after shooting a pointed look towards Sam and Steve and quietly made her way to the mutant's side before speaking to her in hushed tones. Steve watched as she nodded slowly and the Russian took the necklace, mindful of the coin dangling helplessly as she began fiddling with the chain as if to repair it.

"What finally made you come to me?" Alice finally sighed as she placed four mugs on the kitchen table as well as a small jar of cream and a mason jar full of sugar and ultimately breaking the tense atmosphere that had engulfed them for the last ten minutes. Steve sighed softly before launching into an explanation detailing everything they had learned at the hidden S.H.I.E.L.D base in New Jersey and he watched as her eyes became shuttered with thought. "So now S.H.I.E.L.D is hunting you because S.H.I.E.L.D is really HYDRA or rather HYDRA wormed its way into S.H.I.E.L.D through Zola?" When the patriot and spy nodded she scoffed loudly, "I knew we should've put a bullet in his head when we had him." Steve shot her a look full of understanding and sympathy and she shrugged at his silent question to her well-being before glancing at Natasha when she cleared her throat.

"Sounds about right."

Alice then turned her eyes to Sam, "And what's your story in all this?"

"It's one of the reasons we're here actually," Natasha spoke before Sam could and earning her a look of disgruntlement from the man in response as she slid the file across the table to Alice who glanced at it and back to the spy before opening it. "Sam's gear is in Fort Meade and under a heavy amount of lock and key. We weren't sure if you could help us get it."

"That shouldn't be hard," Alice hummed after a few moments of thought. "What's our window?"

"Less than a day," Natasha informed her before motioning to the fixed necklace in her hands. Alice took the necklace with a nod of thanks to the spy before refastening it to her neck, her fingers immediately fidgeting with it.

"I can get us in…less than 5 hours depending on what I'm looking at."

Sam blinked from where he was nursing the coffee she had made for them, "Wait really?"

"We'll be able to run by this afternoon if we're lucky, follow me." She called before standing and making her way out of the room to a door that was set into the wall that separated the kitchen and the living room. She opened the door before briefly turning back to look at them, "Watch your head, gentlemen."

The group followed her down the stairs, Steve and Sam ducking their heads before looking around them in awe. At the bottom of the stairs was another lip that stepped down into Alice's basement but the place looked like something out of one of Tony's labs at Stark tower.

"I started building this area up around a year ago and called in a few favors from Pepper, who was kind enough to convince Tony to supply me with these babies. I knew that if I was going to still be able to help the Avengers – in between training that is – that I'd have to be someone that could translate the mad-scientist jargon of our two resident brainiacs." She informed them before stepping to a table and waving her hand over it and like something out of Stark's very own lab, the monitor was see-through and mobile as she moved around the room.

"When did you learn all of this?"

She looked up at Steve and while still miffed at him for worrying her knew that she couldn't hold a grudge against him for too long and offered him a smile. "Spy turned nurse," She chirped, "I still dabble and got real into it back in the '80s after I escaped the lab." She ignored the questioning looks she received from both Natasha and Sam, the patriot, however, knew what she meant and crossed his arms. "When I'm not running a working farm, I play down here and cast a few lines. Sometimes, the fish take the bait."

"This is how you've been tracking S.H.I.E.L.D…"

She turned her attention to the Russian and smirked, "They're not the only ones I've been keeping track of, but yes, S.H.I.E.L.D was on that list." She began typing quickly, her small fingers moving over the screen faster than Steve had ever seen her type. A crease formed between her pinched brows before she looked back up at the spy. "You wouldn't happen to have any of those hologram face masks would you?"

Natasha shook her head, "Not on me. If I could get back into the Triskelion, maybe."

"That's not necessary. Just means I have to go a different route…it's infantile and a little tacky, but it's always been a real kick at slumber parties."

Steve caught the device she tossed across the room and frowned when he looked down at it. He didn't know what it was, but it seemed Natasha did because she tossed an amused smirk at the mutant. "Voice modulator?"

"I'm thinking that if I hack into the secure files that are focused around project Falcon, I could probably write a fake override that I can use to masquerade a covert op that would lead either the CIA or FBI to needing to get their hands on it – more likely CIA…they do that special operation crap. I can probably even rewrite the military classifications on it so that it's not as guarded."

"You want to hit it in transit?"

She glanced up at the veteran and offered him a feline-like smirk. "Not at all…my plan is to walk right through the front door."

Steve only offered her a relieved smile, "Thanks for doing this, Al…I know you were trying to stay out of stuff like this for as long as possible."

"You'd be lost without me," She teased as she pulled up multiple screens and didn't move when Natasha stood next to her, her eyes tracing the information as the mutant continued to hack. "Something on your mind, Nat?"

"You and Rogers," She drew off. "I don't remember you two being so close."

Alice considered her before shrugging, the oversized flannel she wore slipping from her shoulder slightly before the mutant shrugged it back into place and casting a quick glance at the spy who merely stared back at her. She shook her head, knowing the spy had caught the anxious reaction, before answering, "We had a lot of time to make up for. After the battle of New York we took time to get caught up, rekindled our friendship." She glanced at the redhead and frowned softly, "I know what you're trying to do, Nat, and for both of us it's not going to work."

"Steve said the same," Natasha shrugged, flicking a stray hair out of her eyes as she crossed her arms. "He said you two were merely friends."

"And that's really all it is," The mutant smiled. "I can't put myself through that again…next time, I don't think I'll walk away…hell, it's been seventy years and I still can't walk away. My time is long past that point, but that doesn't mean that you or Steve have to wait either. You both deserve happiness...if you manage to get that, don't give it up."

Natasha's look softened into one of understanding. Though she and Natasha had formed a friendship over the two years while she had been trained by both she and Clint, Alice hadn't told the Russian the finer details into her past but had told her enough. The Russian knew that Alice struggled with connection and that she tended to withdraw suddenly when she felt she was getting too close and Natasha was socially intelligent enough to read that it had come from her years running and living while everyone around her died. Though Alice made a valiant effort to hide her insecurities as well as her trauma it was very clear to the spy who made a living in reading people that the mutant didn't consider herself worthy of anyone's time and Natasha didn't push. Getting to know the smaller woman through training and time she realized that the two of them were not so different, that they had shared similar experiences and it was enough for Natasha to wait until Alice was ready to speak.

"That sounds awfully lonely."

Alice was aware that Sam and Steve were still in the room and were probably trying to be polite and not listen to the two women, but she also knew that the question was unavoidable. "You get used to it." The two shared a significant look before Natasha finally shrugged.

"What can I help with?"

"Wanna read up on the head of the CIA and program it into that voice modulator?"

"Going CIA on this one?" The Russian smirked as she slid from the counter she had sat herself on before heading to another computer, "I like it."

"Figured it would be easier for a false cover, like I said before - they like their special op crap."

"You make me so proud," Alice smirked at the mockingly sweet tone Natasha had taken, the Russian's face filtering her amusement openly as the two eyed each other. Both women ignored when Sam and Steve meandered over to see what they were doing. Sam didn't bother trying to follow as he watched the women work; however, it seemed Steve was getting restless as his blue eyes settled on the petite mutant.

"How much longer do you have?"

"Patience you must have, my young padawan," Natasha snorted on a laugh at the mutant's answer and earning a narrowed look from the patriot, Sam turning his head to hide his own smile. When the blonde didn't seem to catch the reference, Alice grumbled, "Remind me to make you watch _Star Wars_."

"Alice…"

She ignored the warning tone as she answered, "I've already hacked into the government's mainframe and am accessing their files now. Once I'm done I have to back out and override their control of those files and back it up so that we can access it…hence why I'm having Natasha work on the CIA director's personal life so that when I have them call her to confirm the moving of Sam's gear we'll be in the clear and then I can wipe the files easily enough. Shouldn't take me too long... about 2 hours tops if I don't run into any problems." When Steve only frowned at her she offered a reassuring smile, "Trust me, Steve."

"You know I do."

"Then make yourself scarce. Get some sleep and show Sam around if you want, take Rumsfeld for a walk. My home is your home and if you're really restless you can go out to the back barn and use the bags in there," She shrugged before leveling him with a look of warning, "But don't destroy them…I need to use them too." The two men took the hint before offering her a wave as they left and Alice turned her gaze back to the redhead woman, " _Men_."

Natasha's laugh filled the lab in response.

**-0-**

Sam adjusted the tie at his neck and seemed to fidget slightly as he stood in a suit next to the shorter mutant, who had dressed similarly. Per her promise, she had managed to rewrite enough codes to grant them access with simple fake IDs, falsified paperwork and with a fancy flair for the dramatic which included disguises they looked like actual agents.

"I don't see how this is going to work."

"Oh ye of little faith Sammy."

"Don't call me that," The man grunted before watching as she merely shrugged. "So, what are you some kind of super enhanced person too?"

Her brow rose in amusement as she glanced at him, "Super enhanced person?" She giggled at her own parroted question. "Nope, no…no super powers for me." When Sam shot her a disparagingly helpless look she took pity on him and shrugged, "You're familiar with the term mutant, correct?" When he nodded she smirked, "I'm like a cat with nine lives that never seem to run out."

"Why do I get the feeling that all of you people know how to do is tell jokes?"

"Gallows humor, Wilson," She smirked. "It's a solid coping mechanism when the going gets rough."

"Yeah, I'm familiar."

Sam frowned down at her, having recalled what Steve had explained to him merely an hour or so before - Alice was nothing if not efficient as a hacker and had rewritten codes so fast he had been surprised the CIA hadn't kicked down her door or flagged her in their systems. He had been ambling quietly through her living room when he found a picture of her and a soldier, though the image was one he recognized from the Smithsonian. Steve had told him that Alice was a nurse during World War II and her mutation prevented her from dying, which explained why she was still very much breathing and not looking like a ninety year old woman, but didn't explain why she looked to be no older than twenty five. Steve had done his best to answer his questions, but it seemed that even the patriot wasn't sure how all of Alice's mutation worked. Sam had quickly changed the subject and had instead decided to ask about the altercation in the driveway of her house, the patriot had merely shrugged explaining that he wasn't sure where that had come from as Alice seemed more content than a cat with tuna most of the time, but the altercation only escalated when the man had snatched the necklace off of her neck. He then went on to explain that the necklace was the only thing she had left of the man she was still in love with after all this time. It was a real eye-opening story and Sam had laid off flirting with her after that.

"You know, I forget you were in the war with Steve."

"It's not as glamourous as you think it is," She smiled with a knowing look beneath the blonde wig and glasses she wore. "But I'm thankful for him being so popular…leaves me a little bit of anonymity."

"Yeah..." Sam drawled slowly, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. "That wig, by the way, is awful. Blonde is not your color girlfriend."

The mutant snorted, "You're right, Wilson...next time _you_ wear the blonde wig and heels."

"Cheeky."

The brunette merely rolled her eyes in reply as they came to a metal detector and they both placed their belongings along the belt before stepping through upon command of the security guard. After passing the initial screening, they were able to collect their items and continue on. Alice walked with confidence as she and Sam made their way to the next room and she smiled as she came to a stop just before the officers waiting for them.

"Gentlemen, Agents Murtaugh and Riggs," Alice introduced as she took the lead with a smile, she and Sam flashing their fake badges and earning nods of acceptance from the officers. "We were instructed that the EXO-7 Falcon could be found here?"

"Yes ma'am." One of the officers said as he glanced them over, "We received notification an hour ago that you would be coming for it and had it moved up from level 5."

"Excellent," She praised and offering the two men a disarming smile that had Sam's brow arching incredulously, "shall we? The Director will be expecting us and we'd hate to keep him waiting longer than necessary. He's got an engagement later this evening and we've all got deadlines to meet."

"Right this way agents," The other officer nodded with a flirty smile in Alice's direction. "Captain Harrison, but you're welcome to call me Jim ma'am."

"Well then Captain, my partner and I are merely here to collect the project so that we can get it back to HQ," She explained with a sweet smile. "Surely you're the man that could make that happen."

"As you know I'll have to go through the proper channels, but it's yours no muss no fuss."

"Of course," She answered with an easy smile. "And I'm certain that will cost me, Captain?"

"Maybe just a dinner." Sam nearly gagged at how heavily the officer was coming onto the mutant and when the man's eyes flickered to him, he tried to look nonchalant. "Your partner wouldn't mind?"

Alice smirked, "On record, of course I have to decline the offer, but I'm sure my probie here wouldn't mind keeping it to himself if I let him off the hook for a few days…business as usual, surely you understand."

"Absolutely!"

He gestured for them to continue following him and Sam leaned closer to her for a moment, talking out of the side of his mouth, " _Lethal Weapon_? Really?"

"What you don't like it?" She questioned with mock hurt and a pout, "I thought it was rather clever."

Sam glanced at her, "You don't think it's too on the nose?"

Alice glanced back at the officer to see if he was paying attention to them and seeing that he wasn't she turned to the veteran, "If this goes sideways they'll remember our names more than our faces." She answered quietly, "A disguise is only as good as your story and your confidence in that story. The suits let us blend in, but the names are the disguise. It's an old spy trick."

"Seems a little too much like a movie."

"Where do you think the movies get it from?"

Sam shot her a disbelieving look before sighing as the officer returned and offered him a polite smile before his look turned to the shorter woman and turning near lecherous and it took all of his self-control to not say anything to correct the behavior. But with a quick glance at Alice she either seemed to not notice or not care as she began chatting the man back up and keeping his attention from the former Pararescuer. He grumbled to himself, his jaw clenching as he followed both Alice and the officer into a locked and sealed room after the officer submitted to a retinal scan.

"I have to call your superior, just to confirm the paperwork…"

"Oh, silly me!" She cried theatrically, "Here you are officer." She handed him an official looking card that had a business number on the front that both knew would bounce off of the CIA interface to make it seem legitimate before redirecting the call to Natasha who was posing as the CIA director as well as the false documents that gave them clearance to Sam's gear. They waited as the officer made the call before quickly returning and imputing the code into the door that would unlock it only a few moments later, looking as if he had been chastised and Alice made a mental note to ask Natasha what she had said to the man.

"Here we are: one EXO-7 Falcon," He gestured awkwardly. "Try and make sure she doesn't get broken, eh Agents?"

"Oh we'll make sure," Sam nodded as he took the package that housed his old gear almost reverently and it was ignored as the officer looked the mutant over expectantly.

"And would it be too much to ask for your number, sweetness? So that we can set up that dinner?"

Alice smirked widely as she took the pen that had been clipped to the front of her jacket and scrawling a number down on a loose piece of paper she had ripped from the small pad she was carrying before sticking it in his pocket. "I'll be expecting that call, Captain. You have a great day."

The two walked back out of the room, following the way they had entered and Sam glanced at the woman beside him. It had been decided early on that Alice was going to do all the talking, but he hadn't expected her to openly flirt her way to his gear. "What the _hell_ was that?"

She hushed him as they came to the door. The two made quick work of entering the car before she pulled away from Fort Meade and ripping the wig off of her head as soon as they got on the highway. "He's gonna have a nice talk with the sexual harassment hotline when he gets off duty," She smirked earning a laugh from Sam, "I'm not blind to the way people look at a woman like myself, Sam, and I'm not ignorant to my looks…I've been alive too long to be that oblivious." She shrugged again, "He opened the door by flirting with me and even then if they find out that all my protocols are false he's gonna have to explain to his superior officer that he was _seduced_ into giving up the Falcon gear."

"You're devious…I like that."

"Glad you do," She smirked, "otherwise this partnership would get real weird, real fast."

"Onto the next one?"

"Onto the next," She nodded, "Go ahead and give Nat a call, let her know we'll meet her downtown just in time to get Sitwell as he's coming out of the building." Sam laughed out a "yes ma'am" before placing the phone against his ear.

Alice glanced at her GPS and nodded to herself; it would only take them about 40 minutes to get back to DC. After rewriting the accesses for Falcon she hacked back into S.H.I.E.L.D's mainframe by using their own server and checked to make sure she nor Sam were a target. Thankfully, it seemed, they hadn't appeared on radar as they were more focused on Steve and Natasha. Her eyes focused on each car as they passed and she ignored as Sam began changing out of the suit, tossing the jacket and button town in the back seat before turning to look at her.

"Cap and Nat are in position, Sitwell just arrived on scene with Senator Stern."

"Good," She nodded, "We'll get there just in time for a small snack before we _really_ ruin this guy's day."

"How you wanna play it?"

She regarded him for a moment before smiling, "We split up. There's a library across the street from where they're meeting. Steve and Nat are going to meet us on the Capitol One building and we'll _convince_ him to come with us."

"And your plan for that?"

"I'm packing a .50 CAL Desert Eagle outfitted with a scope…I'm sure we can use it to point him in the right direction"

"Y'know," Sam suddenly smirked at her as she fluffed her hair, a movement he had noticed her constantly doing since the wig had come off, "We're turning out to be more of a Vincent Vega and Jules Winnfield."

She threw her head back and laughed, " _Pulp Fiction_? Alright which one are you supposed to be then?"

"Well you're obviously Vega."

"Oh?" She smirked, "And _why_ do I have to be Vega?"

"Because Jules Winnfield is a _black_ man, baby girl, and what do I look like?!"

Alice snorted as a smile curled at her lips, "Ya sure we're not Solo and Chewbacca?"

"I swear if you're claiming I'm a Wookie I will throw myself from this car," Sam laughed.

"No, no…Chewbacca is the one with the brains."

"Oh so it's like that?"

The mutant couldn't help but laugh, "Yeah, it's like that."

"I just want you to know that I don't like you right now."

Alice glanced at the former Pararescuer and couldn't help the smirk that stretched across her lips. The two had become fast friends on their ride over to the fort during the late morning, easily sharing stories back and forth and finding that they both enjoyed film immensely and it seemed that he had been relieved that she understood his references. It was a seeming unspoken agreement to not bring up her love-life or his old military buddy and the two had quickly fallen into an easy partnership. As soon as they made it back into DC, however, the two were all business and she nodded to Sam as she pulled up to the small outdoor café that sat outside the restaurant that the senator and Agent Sitwell were having lunch.

"Alright fly-boy, you're up," She nodded before smiling sweetly at him, "And if it wouldn't be too much trouble grab me a Boba tea!" When he slammed the door behind him she smirked before pulling away and parking around the corner.

As quickly as she could she pulled down her suit pants and exposing the thick leggings beneath before pulling her blouse over her head and retrieving her loose-necked, heather grey henley from the backseat and pulling it over her sports bra as well as a green canvas bomber jacket before trading in her heels for a pair of tall brown combat boots. She stepped out of the car before grabbing both her and Sam's discarded suits and shoes and tossing them in the trunk. She made sure her weapon was set before jogging back to the library. Taking a look around she frowned, noticing the odd amount of civilians before glancing at a cart of souvenirs outside and deciding to see if they had a laser pointer as it would be far too much to risk taking out a firearm in the middle of a crowded area. Paying for her purchase she pressed her hand to her ear and activating the ear piece they had all outfitted with that morning acting as if she was merely brushing her hair from her face.

"I'm online," She spoke softly, grabbing a random book from the shelves and finding a seat near the window where she had a view of the pavilion that lay at the foot of the restaurant. "In position."

" _Sam_?" Steve's voice cut through the comms and she frowned when she heard the exasperation in his voice. Clearly he and Natasha had been talking about his lack of social life again, which he had spoken about to her on a few occasions, and he sounded tense. " _How're you looking?_ "

" _In position_ ," He commented, " _hey Chewie, they didn't have Boba tea so you're SOL_ "

"Oh poo," She snickered, "you're an awful Solo, by the way. At least he would've grabbed a pastry."

" _Sorry not sorry._ " Sam snorted into the earpiece, " _I didn't even get a pastry...what makes you think I'd get you one?_ "

Alice's smile widened from behind the book she was using as a cover, "Because I'm cute, obviously."

" _What the hell are you two talking about?_ "

" _Doesn't matter,_ " Natasha's voice cut through the comms with amusement apparent in her voice, " _Any sign of our man_?"

" _Not just yet_ ," Sam reported.

"It's the same movie I mentioned last night…don't worry we'll watch it." She chuckled before her eyebrows went up, "Look alive, there's our guy."

" _Blady_?"

"Yeah."

" _Casting our lure now_." Sam nodded as the senator walked away from the agent and bringing his phone to his ear.

" ** _Yes sir_**?"

" _Agent Sitwell, how was lunch? I hear the crab cakes here are delicious._ "

The agent looked around the area, his eyes wild behind the frames of his glasses as he realized that the person on the phone wasn't the person he had been expecting. " ** _Who is this_**?"

" _The good looking guy in the glasses_ ," Sam replied easily, " _your ten o'clock_." The man looked wildly for him and she couldn't tell if the former Pararescuer was amused or exasperated as he sighed into his phone. " _Your other ten o'clock. **There** you go._"

Alice watched as Sam raised his glass as if greeting an old friend when the agent finally made him.

" ** _What do you want_**?"

" _You're gonna go around the corner, to your right. There's a grey car, two spaces down. You and I are gonna take a ride_." Sam informed him and she readied her laser pointer.

The agent seemed miffed, " ** _And why would I do that_**?"

" _Because that tie looks really expensive, and I'd hate to mess it up_." Alice shined the laser, leveling it at the agent's chest and watching as he seemed to nod. Sitwell went first and then Sam followed and Alice was already moving to exit the building as she unlocked the car for the men, tossing the keys to her companion and smirking at the agent.

"Agent Sitwell, passenger seat." She directed before moving her jacket slightly to show her firearm and watching as he blinked. She climbed into the back seat and behind Sam so she could properly watch the agent as he settled stiffly into the passenger seat.

"You're a non-combatant," The agent seemed to exude false confidence as he spoke to her. "You're not even on S.H.I.E.L.D's radar…a ghost!"

"I'm a ghost because I made myself a ghost," She answered. "Sit there and be quiet agent…you're good for following orders." She then nodded to Sam and he drove off to where they were meeting Natasha and Steve. After a short drive in which Jasper Sitwell tried to appeal to the two to let him go – Sam pulled up to the corner of the building they were meant to meet the other half of their team and Alice slid out of the car, opening the passenger door and motioning for the man to get out. She then nodded to Sam before pushing Sitwell forward.

"They'll eliminate you," Sitwell snapped when she finally lost her patience and gave him a small push, the man glaring at her over his shoulder before he began walking.

"They won't do anything to me that I'm not willing to do to you," She smirked noticing his nervousness, "Now keep walking. I've got some friends that are just chomping at the bit to see you."

Sitwell frowned, "And who would that be?"

She smirked when Steve and Natasha came into view and she nodded forward, "Cap, Widow."

"Hellcat."

It was then that Sitwell seemed to realize that he was in significant danger, but Alice's gun trained to his spine reminded him to keep moving. They took the elevator to the top floor before Steve grabbed the man by his jacket and forced him up the next flight of stairs until they were on the roof. He then threw Sitwell forward after kicking open the door and the man stumbled.

"Tell me about Zola's algorithm."

"Never heard of it." He replied lamely in the heat of Steve's anger.

"What were you doing on the _Lemurian Star_?"

"I was throwing up, I get seasick," Sitwell nearly whimpered as Steve forced him to the edge of the rooftop - his legs hitting the knee-high parapet running around the circumference of the roof and he stumbled slightly, and the patriot's hands shot out, grabbing his lapels to steady him.

Natasha had trailed just a step behind the patriot - the two seeming to have planned this altercation without Sam and Alice being there - her posture like that of a predator stalking its prey and the mutant stayed closer to the rooftop door to ensure they wouldn't be disturbed. Her fingers danced across the bracer on her wrist that acted as a prototype to one she was working on for her "suit" to Tony's insistence that acted as a portable computer - her job was merely to loop the camera feed to the roof and wherever the group would go to avoid their location being pinged by S.H.I.E.L.D.

Sitwell smirked at the enraged Avenger as if he was suddenly much more confident that he could regain control of the situation, "Is this little display meant to insinuate that you're gonna throw me off the roof? Because it's not really your style, Rogers."

Steve smiled, releasing his lapels and smoothing them down in a sense of eerie calm before smirking, "You're right, it's not...It's _hers_."

Natasha smirked as she stepped forward and kicked the agent from the roof; no one reacting as the man fell, screaming all the way. After a short moment Natasha looked at the patriot, "Oh, wait. What about that girl from accounting? Laura…?"

"Lillian," Steve recalled with a snap of his fingers. "Lip piercing, right?"

"Yeah, she's cute!"

Steve tucked his hands into his khaki pockets, "Yeah, I'm not ready for that." Suddenly Sam reappeared with his Falcon jet-pack strapped to his person and goggles for what Alice could only assume was for when he was in flight and dropped the agent in the middle of the roof behind Natasha and Steve before circling a few more times as he came in to land.

"Zola's algorithm," Sitwell panted around his panic at the near-death experience, "is a program. For choosing _Insight_ 's targets!"

"What targets?"

"You two!" He snapped as he waved aggressively between the captain and mutant before looking between all of them, "A TV anchor in Cairo, the Undersecretary of Defense…" He panted before continuing, "A high school valedictorian in Iowa city. Bruce Banner, Doctor Strange, _anyone_ who's a threat to HYDRA! Now or in the future."

"The future?" Steve frowned, "How could it know?"

"How could it not?" The agent laughed breathlessly and taking a step towards the patriot as if to challenge him, but stopping when he heard the click of a gun as Alice leveled her firearm at him. "The 21st century is a digital book. Zola taught HYDRA how to read it." Glances flew in between the group before Alice gasped.

"Medical history –"

"Bank records, voting patterns, e-mails, phone calls, your damn SAT scores!" He snapped interrupting the mutant and earning a scowl from her, "Zola's algorithm evaluates people's past to predict their future."

There was a tense silence before the patriot stepped forward once more, just stopping short of the agent, "And what then?" They ignored as he began to panic, muttering about Pierce and how he was going to die before Steve lost his patience, "What then!?"

"Then the _Insight_ helicarriers scratch people off of the list…a few million at a time."

At the realization they grabbed the agent and made their way back to the car where Alice stopped. "We're all not going to fit in the car," she informed them before motioning at Sam to pop the trunk and she thanked him with a brief nod. She pulled out a duffle bag full of her gear and slung it over her shoulder before glancing at them. "I'll follow you once I get my hands on a car."

"Are you sure you wanna go separate?" Natasha frowned softly at the mutant before the solider could comment, "It could get messy."

"Maybe," She nodded, "But I'm recognizable. Sam can drive back to S.H.I.E.L.D and cameras won't immediately pick up on Steve in the car if he doesn't sit too close to the windshield. I'll follow in a separate car and meet you there."

Steve frowned after they got Sitwell into the car, "You have gear?"

"Enough," She nodded. "I'll get myself completely situated and follow you."

"Be careful, Alice…we don't know everything and your name was very specific to that list."

"So was yours," She offered him a smile. "But I got a few surprises up my sleeve, Rogers. You just get on the road…we're running out of time."

Steve shot her a final look before nodding, "I'll see you on the other side." As they took off, Alice made quick work of removing her jacket and tying back her hair in a stumpy messy bun at the back of her neck before reaching into her duffle and removing her gun holsters which she tossed over her shoulders before pulling her jacket back on and stuffing two hand guns into the respective slots against her ribs before fishing out another belt.

This belt fit around her waist and held multiple pouches as well as a straight holster that also fit around her thigh for knives before she began outfitting herself with numerous munitions and the blades that Clint had gotten her for Christmas the year before. Attaching another holster to her other thigh was done with quick and practiced movements before she slid another gun into its place and sliding another few knives into place around her boots. She then reached into the bag a final time and pulled out her last two weapons: a metal bar that served as her retractable staff and her rope dart, sliding them into place on their respective holders and closing the bag. She tossed it back onto her shoulder before setting her eyes on a black Honda civic and began hotwiring it.

Time was of the essence and Alice felt that things were only just about to go terribly wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** Holy shit guys...this chapter kind of wrote itself in such a way that tbh, I'm not at all mad at. We're getting down to the wire here and now it's here. Next chapter we've got Bucky coming back. FINALLY!
> 
> I had a lot of fun writing Sam and Alice's interactions here...did anyone catch the Supernatural references here? Aside from that, I genuinely picture Sam being a huge movie buff and I kinda wanted he and Alice to have something in common that I can carry throughout the rest of the story.
> 
> Also, I'm sorry for the language at the beginning of the chapter...I struggled with it a lot because I genuinely did not want to write it. My sister, who is a member of the LGBTQ+ community, had to help me word things while keeping it light enough that I could stomach it. I felt like for that asshole it was necessary especially since Ian and Dan are the main gay characters of this story - I'll be diving into them I promise, but for now let's just focus on Alice/Bucky lol :)
> 
> I hope you guys enjoyed and I hope to see you all in the next chapter! Please let me know what y'all think!
> 
> Puppy and kitten cuddles,
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	13. So Cold

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_13_

* * *

**** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS DEPICTIONS OF VIOLENCE AND THEMES OF TORTURE...ALSO HEAVY LANGUAGE IS USED IN THIS CHAPTER. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ****

* * *

Alice sped down the interstate after Sam's car and lagging only about ten minutes behind the rest of the group when she noticed a car pass by her and she frowned. She could have sworn she saw a man holding onto the edge before she realized the danger, her eyes widening in surprise. He jumped from the car and onto the roof of Sam's before his arm broke through the window and suddenly agent Sitwell was pulled from the vehicle and tossed into oncoming traffic.

"Oh shit!" She cursed barely taking a moment to think about the agent before putting her foot on the accelerator and removing a gun from her side, aiming at the man that stood on the roof of Sam's car that had begun firing at them. Just as she lined up her shot, her car was dinged slightly as a large black hummer knocked her car slightly off course before slamming into the back of Sam's car. Alice righted herself before shifting the gear once more and merging quickly back into traffic and avoiding a collision, aiming her gun once more and opening fire on the back of the hummer.

She managed to shoot out one of the men in the car from the back window before Alice was ducking behind her wheel to avoid the return fire. Suddenly everything stopped and she quickly spun out into the median to avoid a collision with the other cars on the highway and using the car as cover as she shot out her own front window to escape.

She then ran behind some of the other cars that had stopped, using them as cover. She heard more than saw Sam trying to stop his car from moving and she growled as she raced up the highway after them. She knew she had to be as fast as possible and push passed the strain of running despite the burning in her quads. She heard the car flip and she could only watch as her friends fell from the car on one of the doors, sliding up the highway. Sam fell off and continued rolling before scrambling to his feet and ducking behind a car and Alice made for him, diving behind a car as shots began to rain down on them.

"Are you alright!?" She called over to Sam as she rolled under another car and out the other side as she neared the former Pararescuer, handing him a gun and ducking as bullets rained down on them. She glanced over the car she and Sam were using for cover and her eyes widened as she grabbed Sam's shirt, "GET DOWN!" An explosion sounded off to the side of them and she heard the grenade hit Steve's shield with a loud _gong_ before seeing him fly over the edge of the bridge – the sound of vehicles crashing below were drowned out by the sound of bullets hitting against the overturned cars that she, Sam and Natasha were using to avoid the gunfire – more than likely to prevent them from racing after Steve to help. Glancing through the windows her eyes widened. "He's got a Milkor MGL…" She gaped at Sam adrenaline pumping violently through her veins as her mind immediately worked through the surprise warfront she found herself in once again, "where the hell did this guy get his hands on a _Milkor MGL_!?"

"I don't know!" Sam called back before ducking back behind the van they were using as cover, "But we got to move!"

"Go!" She nodded to where there was another over turned car, "I'll cover you!"

"Are you crazy!?"

"The most that'll happen to me is I get shot, I won't die Wilson now get moving!"

He grunted as he threw himself to his feet and took off, Alice following him and firing at the lined men and nearly smirking in victory when she managed to take the mercenary out on the far left before throwing herself across the highway in a roll when the masked man fired a grenade her way.

Her eyes scanned him, from his long, unkempt brown hair, glasses and mask – the make of both confusing her. It appeared as if the glasses themselves were meant for combat and perhaps acted as blinders given the way that his head moved – it was subtle, but no one's head actually moved to and fro in such a way if they were able to use their peripheral vision – and the mask, she realized suddenly, was made of Kevlar and rested tightly to his face, his hair moving in the wind that seemed to kick up bringing her attention to the way it seemed to push against the sides of his face. Her eyes then moved to the metal glinting from his left arm before frowning, noting how the plates seemed to move as if the arm itself was attached to him by his nerves as it seemed to flex and retract like a natural arm would. His outfit was held by a series of leather straps that reminded her vaguely of a strait jacket from the 1940s and his pants appeared to be old and well-worn perhaps even military issued, the boots were also tall combats that had steel plating to them and she made a mental note not to get kicked if she could avoid it before taking in his weapons. He was well outfitted and she suddenly thanked her foresight to bring as many of her weapons as possible that morning, however she noticed that his harnesses were awkwardly strapped as if he were being contained rather than the leather being fit for his comfort as it pulled across his chest.

His eyes seemed to find her across the field as he aimed the launcher at her once more and her nostrils flared as she shot backwards, her feet already moving and taking her to her next line of cover.

The lined gunmen followed as the outfitted man merely walked forward and Alice caught Natasha's eye from behind her cover, "Who is this guy?"

"He's called the Winter Soldier!"

_Winter Soldier_!? Alice's mind screamed, _what kind of name is that_!? She then moved once again to another overturned car as he fired another grenade at Natasha who had stood to shoot before watching as the woman disappeared into oncoming traffic. Alice knew she would be fine and so focused on the men in front of her. Aiming carefully and taking out another of the gunmen. The masked man seemed more concerned with Natasha, however, and fired another grenade at a car she had just disappeared behind.

"Alice!" She turned her head sharply at the call and looked to Sam, "You need to get down below! Cap got blasted off and there're civilians! I got this, go!"

"Got it!" She stood suddenly firing her gun and taking out another mercenary before returning the weapon to its holster and removing her rope dart, latching onto a lamp post and jumping just in time to avoid more gunfire and another explosion as the grenade hit where she had been previously standing, the heat from the blast licking her heels. She hit the button on the handle of the weapon, releasing the dart from the chain and dropping down and rolling out of the fall before rolling the chain back up with practiced movements and reattaching the dart. She didn't return the weapon to its place at her side; instead she wrapped it over her shoulder and ran to where there was a city bus turned over.

The bus driver, though dazed, was busy helping passengers out of the overturned vehicle and Alice made quick work to help pull the remaining two civilians out before pushing them behind a car as gunfire sounded off again, two shots ripping through her shoulder and she cursed before turning.

Her eyes widened as she took in the new firing squad and their toys before turning to the bus conductor, "Get out of here and find cover! Keep behind cars if possible and make your way into the buildings if you can!" She didn't wait to hear the man's reply as she began moving once again.

The men kept their fire on the bus, she had vaguely noticed Steve stirring inside before the shots had been fired and knew he would be fine as he broke through the other end of the bus, scooping up his shield as he went. Alice turned her eyes to see the Winter Soldier advancing on Natasha and she frowned, allowing her mutation to take care of her shoulder before running towards them, using a car to get extra lift she dove at the man, tackling him to the side, nearly crying in triumph as she took him by surprise and immediately engaging him.

"Alice!"

"Get out of here and start evac!" She called back breathlessly as she dodged a swing of the metal arm, blinking as it sunk into the concrete next to her head.

She glared up into his eyes – startled by the stormy blue glare they had been narrowed in and familiarity stirred to life in her gut before kicking him solidly in the chest and dodging another swing as she ducked underneath him, unraveling the chain of her rope dart as she went. With practiced movements she swung the chain sharply, using the weighted end to create a faster swing before figure-eighting the chain around her body and allowing it to swing behind her and around her neck as she sent the dart's end at her opponent. When he dodged it she allowed the cylinder to swing back and she twisted, using her body as a fulcrum to propel the metal end at him once again at a faster speed. She knew she wouldn't be able to match him in a fight, he clearly overpowered her, but her goal was to give Natasha enough time to come up with a plan, maybe even set a trap and evacuate as many people as she could to prevent further casualties as those on the highway were a relative lost cause.

The soldier seemed to realize this as well as he pulled out a gun and Alice swung out of the way, the bullet merely grazing her arm and she kicked the dart back out at him, her aim being the gun in his hand. She would have cheered when it made contact and forced him to drop it, but she knew now was not the time for such celebrations as she recalled the weapon, allowing it to encircle her form as the soldier clearly decided close-combat was the way to deal with her, twirling a knife between his fingers as he darted forward with speed that the mutant hadn't been entirely prepared for.

She dodged a swipe of his knife, blanching when he merely switched hands and grunting when the blade pierced her forearm as she blocked her face before twisting away once more. She could feel his strikes vibrate in her bones and knew immediately that he was more like Steve. He had enhanced strength, speed and mobility – all things that very much equaled disaster for the much smaller mutant who relied more on speed and agility to land strikes. The two continued to dance around one another and Alice desperately tried to create some space between them snapping her fist out occasionally, but despite the small victories where she managed to connect her strikes she knew he would overpower her and it seemed as if his patience with their exchange was running out. Faster than Alice could track, his hand snapped backwards and catching her in the jaw nearly sending her sprawling before she managed to catch herself on the side of a car and immediately pushing back off as he followed through with another strike with his metal hand.

She heard the gears activate in his arm suddenly and giving him what seemed to be a boost as he grabbed a part of the car and swung and she yelped as she leapt back, removing her staff and keeping it compressed as she blocked another strike, the soldier using the twisted metal of the car as if it were a blade. With each strike she blocked she could feel the reverberation in her arms and knew that her time was running out when she nearly tripped over debris as she dodged again. She cried out suddenly when she felt a blade sink into her side and she dazedly looked up to see gun-metal blue staring blankly at her. She grunted as she pulled out one of her own knives and swung, aiming at his face and glancing briefly down at herself to see merely the hilt and she groaned before adrenaline kicked back in and she was dodging another swing.

She knew she wouldn't be able to keep him busy much longer and only hoped Natasha had managed to get enough people away before she inevitably would succumb to her own mutation and need to shut down. She blocked her side, using her knife to swing as well as the martial arts she had retained and frowning when the weapon grazed off of his arm. She then snapped her hand out, grabbing a hold of the straps that held the leather tunic to his chest and giving herself enough leverage to try and pull him to the ground, but she hadn't anticipated his recovery time and he instead trapped her hand to his chest the metal of his hand unyielding and bone-crushing in its grip and his flesh hand finding purchase around her throat before swinging her over his shoulder and dislocating her arm, her body slamming into the hood of the car behind him.

She cried out before reaching for the knife in her side and pulling, the blade removing with a _squelch_ before she swung it at him and forcing him back once again before giving herself enough room to roll away from him and vault over another vehicle, using her momentum to slide to the other side and using the car as cover.

Taking only a second to consider her next move she began running, ignoring as the man cursed in another language before she heard the sound of gunfire once more. She turned to return fire only to find the Winter Soldier before her, glaring at her as he fired three consecutive shots into her chest and she staggered. The pain ripped through her and while she could already feel her mutation beginning to heal the damage it wasn't enough to get her moving as he strode past her and towards where Natasha had disappeared just moments before, thinking her finished.

"Give 'em hell Nat," She grunted as she rolled to her side. What felt like hours later, but could only have been mere moments, Steve sprinted up to her and took a look at the bullet holes in her chest.

"Alice…"

"Put my arm back in place," She grunted and showing him the limp appendage, "My mutation will heal around it and I'll have to rebreak it."

He didn't hesitate to grab her shoulder and pop it back into socket – ignoring her yelp – before looking down at her, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine." The sound of distant gunfire and another two explosions, however, made her brows crease. "I couldn't slow him down. He's after Nat." Steve didn't need further explanation as he sprinted off in the direction of the shots and screams and Alice groaned before forcing herself to her feet and stumbling after the patriot at a slower pace. She managed to turn a corner just to see Steve get knocked backwards.

"Nat!"

She didn't need further coaxing as the soldier slammed into Steve once again and the mutant raced over to her fallen comrade to see her sporting a bullet wound in her chest, "Damnit, I'm sorry I couldn't hold him longer."

"No," Natasha gasped around the pain radiating from the wound, "No, you did good."

"I think you're lying," Alice remarked quickly in forced humor as she assessed the damage and was satisfied to notice that the bullet had gone through the redhead's shoulder. Moving quickly she reached into her belt and produced a wad of pack gauze before looking down at the spy apologetically, "Sorry about this…" She said by way of explanation before shoving the wad into the wound on both sides and earning her a strangled cry for her trouble. She didn't remark on the sound, knowing that Natasha's adrenaline was still kicking around and quickly pulled out a patch and slapped it over the still bleeding wound and repeating the same step on the back of the woman's shoulder. "That's all I can do for now."

"I'm good."

She turned as the spy pushed away from her and reaching for the fallen grenade launcher just as Steve managed to flip the Winter Soldier over his shoulder and away from him, the mask he had been wearing clattering on the asphalt between them.

Time seemed to slow as he picked himself up and turned, Alice's heart stopping in her chest as she took in the face of James Buchanan Barnes.

"This…this is a cruel joke right?" She mumbled to herself with wide eyes.

How was something like this possible? She read the reports of all the Commandos, she read the report Steve had wrote. Had he truly survived the fall? If he did how was he still alive now? Her mind raced with questions that she knew didn't have an answer, vaguely noticing she was going into shock as her body trembled. Alice had wanted for nothing more than to see her love once again, had wished for it for so long and now that he stood in front of her she couldn't understand why she felt so betrayed. Was it because he had tried to kill her so callously mere moments ago, or was it because he should – if nothing else – know who Steve was?

Steve stood mere feet from her, his eyes wide and breathing erratic as he took in the face of his old friend before glancing briefly to Alice for a brief moment and back again. A poleaxed expression had fallen across her features, the healthy and sandy color of her skin had paled dramatically and making the dirt and blood that lined her exposed flesh stand out more and he knew he didn't look much better. He was beginning to feel the aches of the Winter Soldier's – no, he had to remind himself suddenly, Bucky's – strikes despite the adrenaline that was still coursing through his veins. His heart thundered in his ears as he took in the man across from him: long, unkempt hair, pale skin – paler than he had ever seen Bucky before – that had the beginnings of a five o'clock shadow forming around his mouth and along his still defined jaw, and the metal arm that glinted in the sunlight like a beacon of his own failure, the failure to have saved his friend all those years ago.

"Bucky?"

For the first time in the fight, the soldier's face broke, confusion settling into his features as his eyes narrowed at the patriot, " _Who the hell is Bucky_?"

His voice was rough, horse from disuse and all Alice could think about was how much he had seemingly suffered. Was this even the same man that she had lost? The sounds around them seemed to fade as his eyes wavered between Steve and her, his eyes flashing for a brief moment as if in recognition before Sam flew in, his feet connecting with the back of his head and knocking him over before landing and taking cover. Alice, however, stepped from her cover almost mechanically, watching as his eyes flickered between her and Steve once more before they seemed to linger on the charm around her neck with an almost hyper sensitivity before he pulled out his handgun and aimed just an explosion rocked the area between them all and he was suddenly gone.

Sirens echoed throughout the area and suddenly S.H.I.E.L.D Strike team swarmed the area and pointed guns on all of them. Shouting for them to comply, Alice dropped her weapon allowing herself to be forced to her knees as they quickly disarmed her before they forced her arms behind her back. She noticed the others being restrained as well before frowning as they were loaded into the back of a separate van and she was being led to another. She heard Sam questioning the men loudly in her defense but she couldn't seem to form words.

He was _alive_.

It seemed to echo in her soul along with the pain of knowing that the man that she had fought was the man she had lost so long ago and yet he wasn't. He didn't recognize her at all and the realization hit her suddenly like a freight train: _HYDRA_. She snarled at the thought, her vision snapping back into focus as she realized they were in motion and they all had weapons trained on her.

"What're we gonna do with her?"

Rumlow glanced back at her and she glared at him with all the fire of a woman scorned and he scoffed, "She won't die no matter how many bullets we pump her with. Kill the others. She comes back with us."

"Hear that, sweetheart?" The man closest to her seemed to laugh behind his helmet. "You've got a date."

"Go _fuck_ yourself." The strike was sudden and her head snapped to the side at the force of the blow and she rolled her neck, spitting the glob of blood that had exploded in her mouth on the floor of the van before smirking at the man. "You're gonna have to do a little better than that, _sweetheart_."

"I got one better," another Strike member snarled before hitting her with a taser. Her teeth clenched tightly in response, her body seizing up as electricity flew through her system and as black edged on the corner of her vision she groaned, struggling to keep herself together as the two men seemed to think now was as good a time as any to strike her until she lost consciousness. Alice frowned knowing that not only was she going to be used as a hostage, but she wasn't going to like what she saw when she woke up.

**-0-**

Alice awoke to find herself in a strange room that held multiple small shelving compartments beyond the bars that sealed her into an area no larger than twice the length of her body. She glanced down at herself to find that all of her weapons had been removed and was, without a doubt, in a locked storage somewhere and her hands were chained together by handcuffs that were thicker than the standard ones cops used, her mind immediately concluding that these cuffs belonged to Department K and she intimately remembered their use. She was sore and managing to catch a reflection of herself she knew she looked no better than death warmed over. Her shirt maintained the bloody holes from the bullets and stab wounds she had taken from beneath her jacket and her leggings had a rip across her thigh and down the shin of her other leg. As she worked her jaw she winced, realizing belatedly that her face was bruised and still felt tender even as she rested her cheek back against the cool concrete floor.

When her head stopped spinning and she was a bit more cognizant she noticed the Strike team standing around and talking to each other quietly, a machine whirring nearby as scientists spoke softly and she could hear metal being worked on. Gathering her feet underneath her she sat up and looked beyond to see Bucky – her heart shuddering in her chest at the sight of him – hooked up to an IV drip that she assumed was pumping him with a mild sedative and sitting in a reclining chair that was attached to a metal contraption, one she recognized from her time as an experiment and she felt fear begin to creep into her chest and seize her heart. Images of her time in the white box suddenly came rushing forward and she bit her lip violently in an effort to bring herself back to reality, no matter how triggering or awful it seemed to be at the moment.

As much as she wanted to not believe it, Bucky did not recognize her and he wouldn't be any help in her getting out of there. She watched as the men in coats were fixing his metal arm, his eyes staring off and distant and her heart wrenched again. He looked no different than he did when she last saw him, his handsome features unaged and his hair still dark against the unusual pallor of his skin. His eyes though still gun-metal blue, were cold and disconnected as if gazing far away and she had to stop the strangled cry before it clawed its way up her throat. HYDRA had done this to him and she vowed that she would destroy every last one of them for what they had turned the man she loved into.

She jumped when a doctor screamed suddenly, thrown back away from the soldier and left to skid across the room. Agents swarmed him and he tossed them away effortlessly before Rollins, one of the Strike Team members, put a gun against his head and he sat back as if not recognizing what he had just done. She forced herself to stand, staggering and near collapsing into the bars in front of her and drawing the attention of the soldier.

"What did you do to him?" She snarled breathlessly at the nearest agent and earning her a glare and a gun aimed at her for her trouble. "You know I can't die so go ahead." She pressed herself into the bars, her hazel eyes blazing cinnamon as she stared down the agent and lined her forehead up with the barrel of his gun. "Go ahead and shoot."

"Don't shoot her," She did not remove her eyes from glaring at the agent as Rumlow came into view. "Pierce wants her."

Alice's lip trembled to form a snarl as her nostrils flared. "I will kill every single one of you..."

"That's a joke and we all know it," Rumlow smirked at her, fisting the lapels of her jacket through the bars and pulling her flush into them. "You're about as harmless as he is when he's not taking orders." He motioned to the stationary Bucky whose eyes seemed to follow them and the movement as if suddenly aware of the events transpiring around him, but he made no move to intervene. "Like a gun that gets put away when it's not in use. But you?" He snorted on a humorless laugh as he glared down at her, "You're about as threatening as a dull knife."

She smirked humorlessly, the expression nonplussed and defiant as he pulled her further against the bars, "You've clearly never been cut by a dull blade before." He snarled, tossing her backwards and causing her to stumble before she managed to catch herself on the table in her small area. Despite her bravado she felt the terror simmering beneath the surface and she could only do so much to prevent it from breaking past the carefully constructed mask she had forced into place, her eyes narrowing at him. "You're gonna regret not finding a creative way to kill me…and I'll show you all exactly what I did to the last people who held me against my will."

Rumlow only snorted before stalking away and nodding to another Strike team member who shot her in the shoulder. Alice swore loudly, glancing down to see the pattern had been buckshot and she groaned. Shot gun blasts were always annoying to her and she found that her body was reacting to her healing slowly, but steady enough that the wounds were relatively harmless. The man seemed to watch in horror as she sat herself back up and glared at him, "Nice try…gonna need a bit more than that though." Another member stalked forward and glared as if ready to take her up on her promise before he was stopped.

"She's riling you up."

"I don't see why we need to babysit her too…she's a freak."

"Now that's rude," She snorted, rolling her shoulder and earning a pop in response. "Didn't your mother teach you how to talk to women?"

"Go to hell!"

"Oh, I've been," She remarked without humor, her tone dry albeit challenging, "didn't agree with me."

Rumlow stepped in front of her prison once more and growled at her, "You know, there are no prisoners with HYDRA – just order." When she shot him a blank look he laughed, "That order only comes through pain, freak, you ready for yours?"

"Kiss my ass," She bit behind clenched teeth before spitting on the ground at Rumlow's feet.

Rollins was suddenly pulling open the door of her cell and stepping through after a brief nod from Rumlow, landing a haymaker against her jaw and knocking her backwards before Alice was able to block the strike. She quickly regained her balance, bringing her bound hands up and blocking her face before weaving underneath another wild swing. She kicked her leg out, catching the man in his hip before spinning and dropping her weight, using her hands to support her as she swept at his feet. It was a cage match she hadn't wanted to find herself in, but knew that this agent was a loose cannon from what Steve had told her and tended to act before he thought and she knew she had to use that against him.

She quickly stood backing away from him as he regained his footing, not hesitating to aim a strike for her head as he kicked his leg out in a roundhouse. Alice stepped forward, just passed his knee and caging him. He had height on her and longer legs so she knew to eliminate that threat she would need to keep closer to him, but he also was physically stronger than her so she had to time herself appropriately if she wanted to get out as unscathed as possible. Her goal wasn't to win, she knew she couldn't in the limited space; her currently bound hands and the guns still trained outside of the small cell betraying any success she could have. No, she couldn't win, but she could damn sure try to minimize damage so she didn't spend all of her useful energy on healing. She knotted her fingers together as she snapped her joint hands out and into his sternum before swinging in the small space and hooking a punch into his exposed ribs and his face, spinning suddenly and snapping her leg out in a mule kick to knock him back into the bars and away from her.

He scrubbed his lip that had split when she had punched his face before snapping out a tasing rod and she tensed, knowing that she wasn't going to last much longer. Electricity couldn't kill her, but it was absolute hell on her mutation to have to recalibrate her body's natural pathways after taking any damage from it. Tasing was the fastest way to stop her and it seemed as if they knew this small bit of information because they had used it on her once already. He snapped the rod forward and she dodged to the side to avoid the strike before moving once again as his other hand snapped out in an effort to grab her. She blocked another strike, forcing herself to ignore as the electricity numbed her forearms from where the strike landed before leaning back slightly and missing another swing before kicking at his knee and twisting away from him as she went. She wasn't expecting to walk right into another blow, this one hitting the exposed skin of her neck and she cried out as the electricity stung its way through her body, vaguely realizing that Rollins was holding her tightly and forcing the rod against her skin as tightly as he could.

"That's enough, I think she gets it."

She slumped over slightly once the rod had been removed and Rollins let her fall against the nearby table without grace as he stalked away from her. She watched warily, her eyes narrowing dangerously as he stepped out of the small area and snapped the door shut behind him with a smirk twisting cruelly on his lips.

"Order only comes through pain."

She snorted, her chest heaving as she tried to get her breath back, "Pain…you don't know a damn thing about it." She coughed slightly as she glared at him. "I don't give a rat's ass about HYDRA and I will _never_ submit to them. I didn't for twenty years while in captivity the first time with Weapon X and if you think you're gonna be able to do that in a few hours you're sorely mistaken."

"We'll see about that," Rumlow chuckled before turning away from her. "Pierce has big plans for you."

She ignored the jab and instead allowed herself to lean her weight fully into the table, not trusting herself to keep standing as she forced her focus into her mutation. She counted her breaths as she allowed her new reality to set into place. She was being held by HYDRA and they seemed to know at least a little about how her mutation worked and silently cursed Fury for not deleting the file on her when she had asked him to in the '80s. Fear crept into her chest when she remembered what they had done to her the first time she had been experimented on and she could feel the ghosting ache of the brand on her inner arm, the numbers branded there were forever to be a reminder of what had happened whether she wanted to forget or not. It was the reason she had always opted for long sleeves as t-shirts tended to expose the scars there. She forced the panic from her system, putting her focus on what she could do to get out of this situation entirely and was falling short. She knew that an elaborate plan would do nothing. If HYDRA wanted her to keep her, she would have to get really clever and it was out of the parameters she was willing to think about. Her body ached and while she was mostly in one piece she knew that her troubles were only beginning.

**-0 -**

**_October 2012_ **

_As the Avengers got to the top penthouse of Stark Tower they soon realized that Loki had been beaten and was lying in his own imprint in the ground. Hulk snorted as if in laughter and Alice looked up at the large mutant with a smile curling her split lips, "Remind me not to piss you off…I'd hate to see what you could do to someone like me big guy." The Hulk only seemed to smile before patting her head almost affectionately before stepping away._

_"You've got a death wish I swear."_

_She shot Tony a good-natured and tired smirk as they all surrounded the defeated god and Alice couldn't help the relief that spread through her veins at the sight of the battle finally finished. As they fully surrounded him the god looked up as if slightly ashamed, though his eyes found those of Iron Man. "If it's all the same to you…I'll take that drink now."_

_"Yeah nice try," Tony scoffed before looking to the gathered heroes. "All right, get him on his feet. We can stand around posing up a storm later. By the way, feel free to clean up."_

_Alice glanced at the man dryly, "Couldn't you just pay someone to do it for us? We're supposed to be getting Shawarma remember?"_

_"Good, yes!" Tony called as he smiled at the woman, "You looking for a job Puss in Boots because I could use a good secretary around here?"_

_"Shut up, Tony."_

_Natasha stepped away as Thor began restraining Loki, "So who gets the magic wand?"_

_Steve glanced at her, "Strike team is coming to secure it." The elevator opened behind them and room soon filled with members from S.H.I.E.L.D and Alice watched as the group began clean up and ignored the looks that were shot her way._

_An Agent that Alice wasn't certain she had met just yet stepped forward and towards Natasha who held Loki's scepter. "We can take that off your hands."_

_"By all means," She smiled tiredly. "Careful with that thing."_

_"Unless you want your mind erased. And **not** in a fun way," Clint had said before tossing an arm around the mutant's shoulder and sighing loudly. "I'm beat, kid."_

_Sitwell only smiled tightly, his eyes darting between the agent and mutant, "We promise to be careful." He said before the Strike team began putting the scepter away._

_"You're telling me." She smiled at the archer and more than happy to ignore the agents surrounding them and it was perhaps why Clint had pulled her to him. Regardless she wouldn't correct the action as it was very welcome. "I don't think I've ever been more excited for a shower and a bed in my life and that's after needing to bury into a foxhole every night during World War II."_

_"That's still weird," The archer remarked as he looked down at her. "Remind me to ask later."_

_"Reminder made," She smiled before allowing the man to lead her to the elevator where the other Avengers were beginning to gather. Steve had been nodding along to another agent that seemed to speaking through his earpiece, "On my way down to coordinate search and rescue." He said before catching the first elevator and disappearing from view._

_"On my way to coordinate search and rescue!" Loki mimicked as he transformed into a startlingly perfect copy of Steve before he transformed back and looked to his brother, "I mean, honestly! How do you think you'll be –?"_

_He never got to finish his statement as Thor rolled his eyes, smacking a device over his brother's lips and silencing him, "Shut up."_

_As they entered the elevator Alice couldn't help but feel bad as the Hulk went to join them, everyone crying protests against the idea. He glared at them and growled, "Move!"_

_"Whoa, whoa! Hey! Buddy. What do you think?" Tony frowned as he sat on the case holding the Tesseract, "Maximum occupancy has been reached."_

_Thor frowned, "Take the stairs."_

_"Yeah! Wait no, stop, stop!" Tony's cries were cut short when the elevator closed and protecting them from the Hulk's fury. Alice had unknowingly pressed herself closer to Clint's side, sandwiching herself between the archer and Natasha who looked down at her with a lifted brow but didn't comment._

_Her eyes darted between the agents, frowning when they seemed to glance back at her every now and again and she felt herself pressing herself further back. Close spaces had always made her uncomfortable and with so many people in the elevator at once the mutant felt her claustrophobia kicking in. Clint, seemingly realizing the issue, squeezed her shoulder and began speaking to her in a hushed voice and she never thought she could appreciate another human being more than she did Clint Barton in that moment. They soon reached the bottom floor and everyone began filing out before turning towards where the main entrance of Stark Tower was located only to come to a halt as a new group stood before them._

_The group consisted of S.H.I.E.L.D members and agents wearing suits and at the head of the column was an elder man with aging hair and fine lines dressed in an expensive grey suit. Alice frowned as she surveyed him, his blue eyes were like daggers and they flickered to her for a brief moment and she couldn't help but feel as if he was drinking in her appearance and not in a flattering way. His eyes traced her as if in recognition before his eyes flickered back to Tony who had raised a hand as if stopping the group, a scowl tugging his lips down on his aged features._

_"Uh, may I ask you where you're going?"_

_Thor spoke first, his tone innocently confused yet polite, "To lunch and then Asgard. And I'm sorry, you are?"_

_"Alexander Pierce," Tony supplied with a forced smile. "He's the man above the folks behind Nick Fury."_

_"Oh."_

_The man placed his hands on his hips and looked the group up and down, "My friends call me Mr. Secretary…Now I'm gonna have to ask you to turn that prisoner over to me."_

_Thor glanced at him and then the group standing before them, his face only portraying pleasantness and patience though the tightening around his eyes spoke to his irritation with the man, "Loki will be answering to Odin himself."_

_Alice did not miss the mentioned god's eye roll and she couldn't help but think that Loki looked more like a child who had gotten caught breaking their sibling's toys rather than a man who had wiped out nearly half of Midtown. Is this how gods played? If so she didn't want to know any more stories of Thor growing up on Asgard and a quick look at Clint showed he had similar thoughts._

_"Oh, he's gonna answer to us. Odin can have what's left." Pierce all but growled at the blonde behemoth, "And I'm gonna need that case, that's been S.H.I.E.L.D property for over 70 years."_

_Alice frowned, "No disrespect intended when I say that the Tesseract shouldn't stay on Earth at all. S.H.I.E.L.D property or no, it doesn't belong to us."_

_"I'm sorry and you are?"_

_The mutant frowned, but Tony smoothed the ruffled feathers with a quick wave of his hand, "Mr. Secretary, Miss Alice Alexander."_

_The man's brows lifted as his eyes turned to her once more, "Not the same Alice Alexander who was first helping Howard Stark with researching the cube?"_

_"My grandmother, actually. I'm named for her." She remarked tightly and ignoring the looks she received for the deception from her team, but no one corrected her. She didn't like this man nor did she trust him, the arm around her shoulders being the only thing that kept her grounded in the moment as they stared one another down, "and it is my professional opinion that the Tesseract be returned to Asgard where it belongs."_

_"Hand over the case, Stark."_

_"I'm not gonna argue who's got the higher authority here, alright?"_

_The crashing of the Hulk in the lobby made everyone jump and stopped the agent from taking the briefcase from Tony as he glared, "NO MORE STAIRS!"_

_He growled as people began to run and Alice turned her eyes to see that Pierce's gaze had not left her and she frowned openly, crossing her arms across her chest self-consciously and nearly using Clint as a shield. Was it cowardly? Perhaps, but at that particular moment the mutant couldn't place the almost hungry gaze in the man's eyes and fanned the small flame of fear that had centered in her chest._

**-0-**

After what felt like hours, she suddenly heard the doors open beyond. She heard the voices before they came into view and exposing them to be a scientist and Secretary Pierce, who glanced in her direction and smirked. "Our guest of honor, so it appears."

"Secretary Pierce," She spoke, her voice biting as she stood her ground. "Interesting, you seemed so much taller our first meeting."

"A regular comedian, no wonder Stark seems to like you so much." He snorted as he stopped before her make-shift cell, "It's a shame you put up such a fight. We could've avoided all of this…unpleasantness."

"It wouldn't have mattered. Even if I'd have stayed away you would've found some way to drag me in."

Pierce smiled at her cruelly, "How very astute, Miss Alexander, which is why you are here and not with the rest of your team."

"So, what," She snorted, "you had this planned since New York?"

The man smirked at her, "Something like that. Did you really think I didn't know who you were? You showed your hand relatively early that day, joining the Avengers and stepping into the spotlight."

"It wasn't without trying," She growled. "You had Fury pull my file… _insisted_ I was dangerous and convinced him that I needed to be held…why?"

Pierce looked her over, the hungry look he had two years ago reappearing on his face and Alice did everything in her power not to fidget under his gaze, " _Very_ well done, Miss. Alexander…Yes, I had Fury bring you out of hiding. Had you not hacked into the S.H.I.E.L.D database in '08, we wouldn't have found you so quickly…it didn't take much to convince Nick that you were a potential threat considering your past and the Alien incident back in '95 to make him realize that there were very real dangers out there, dangers that were outside of our control. It was all a part of our plans for you. You see HYDRA is about order and furthering human existence through obedience. To bring about a utopia for all people to share, but your kind have always been against that…amazing what a little funding through Weapon X could offer."

Alice's brow furrowed, "Weapon X was funded by the Canadian Government through Department K."

"Oh yes," He grinned cruelly as he leaned against her prison, knowing she couldn't do anything about it. "But did you _really_ think HYDRA was exclusive to Germany? Over time we've managed to infiltrate the world thanks to Arnim Zola's work after the Red Skull. His work in S.H.I.E.L.D was beneficial for our ideals to continue growing and we also have your little boyfriend to thank as well." When her eyes tightened and she scowled in open defiance his grin widened and taking on an almost feral edge, "We funded Department K and it brought us _you_ …effective _immortality_." When Alice glowered in reply he smirked before walking away from her and standing in front of the still stationary soldier. Her lip curled into a snarl as he looked at her over his shoulder, "Just so that you understand your position here…I want you to see this." He nodded and suddenly the door to her cell opened and she was being dragged out by Rumlow and Rollins and forced to stand off to the side of the machine Bucky was still sat in.

Alice grunted as their grips tightened and she was positive she'd have bruises, the agents shaking her as she attempted to regain her balance. Pierce only smirked at her before turning his attention to the soldier, whose look had briefly flickered to her before becoming far away once more, troubled.

"Mission report." When he didn't answer the Secretary frowned, "Mission report, _now_." When he still received no answer, his hand snapped out and made contact with the soldier's face and Alice fought against the agents holding her only to cry out as she was hit in the stomach before the agents managed to tighten their hold, Rollins fisting her hair in his hand and forcing her to look forward once more. Bucky's face had stayed snapped to the side, his eyes again meeting hers, before slowly centering, his gaze still unfocused. The child-like look his features had taken made her heart squeeze in her chest and she could feel her eyes misting and she had to force the sob that wanted to claw its way out of her chest back down her throat.

"The man on the bridge…" He gaze briefly flickered to her once more, " _Her_ …who are they?"

Her heart shattered and she felt the tears that had been steadily building leak from her eyes without permission and leaving silent tracks down her dirt-smudged cheeks.

"You met him earlier this week on another assignment." Pierce answered. "She is an unnecessary attachment."

"I know them."

The Secretary motioned for a chair and he turned it so he could sit before looking at the soldier in front of him once more his look barely considered compassionate. "Your work has been a _gift_ to mankind. You shaped the century and I need you to do it one more time. Society is at the tipping point between order and chaos." He shot a smug look at the bound woman before continuing. "Tomorrow morning we're gonna give it a push. But, if you don't do your part, I can't do mine and HYDRA can't give the world the freedom it deserves."

"You're a liar!" Alice snarled finally and earning her another strike for her trouble and groaned as her head was wretched back from where her hair was still fisted in Rollins' grasp. "You _know_ me, Bucky, and he is lying to you!"

"Shut her up before I do," Pierce snarled though his look was smug as she cried out when Rumlow struck her across her already bruised face once more. He then turned his attention back to the soldier to see that her words had affected him as he looked troubled, his lips thinning as he seemed to beg Pierce to understand, "But I knew them…"

Pierce only seemed to snarl before glaring at the doctors, "Prep him."

Alice fought against their hold, strangled screams passing her split lips as she attempted to free herself and ignoring as the two agents wasted no time in attempting to beat her into submission. She struggled as hard as she could nearly throwing off one of the agents that had come to assist the two Strike team members and kicking Rumlow before Rollins had regained hold on her head and slamming his fist into her side. Her adrenaline took over as she tried to fight her way back to Bucky to see they were powering up the machine, a scientist fitting a mouth guard into his mouth to prevent him from breaking his teeth as they fit the apparatus to his head. She kicked out at another agent and swung her interlocked fists at another as the machine strapped him into the chair.

His name was on her lips as they flipped the switch and he screamed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** *Ducks and hides behinds multiple walls for protection* I'M SORRY GUYS!
> 
> Look, it's the Winter Soldier...we knew it wasn't gonna be butterflies and rainbows...as much as I WANT IT TO BE, but I HAD to stay true to the original story/move angst here. There was a lot of consideration that I took with this chapter. Initially I was going to have her in the armored car with Natasha, Sam, Steve and undercover Maria Hill, but decided that in order to a) be a little different and b) get into my own plot in the story...Alice needed to see what was happening behind the scenes. KEEP THIS IN MIND FOR LATER! This chapter really forces a lot of the decisions she will make in the future of this story up until Civil War! I promise you guys that they will have happier reunions in the future, but given how he barely remembered Steve, he really wasn't gonna just immediately remember Alice.
> 
> As much as I want to indulge, the perfectionist in me demands I stick as much to the MCU here as possible...and that goes for how Sebastian describes Bucky in this movie as well. I genuinely try to do as much research into each aspect of these characters between rehashing their actions/backgrounds in comics as well as picking apart each and every scene in the MCU...and then of course, watching hours of panel footage and interviews with the actors themselves to get a good idea of how they decided to portray these characters that we love so well. Trust me, we WILL get to the point where everyone lives relatively happy lives and I have a lot planned for the divergence of the MCU to my own plot that I've been slowly weaving in here ;) I promise once we get there you guys are (hopefully) gonna love it!
> 
> Next chapter we move on to a little more angsty-Alice, a cute flashback and some serious ass-kicking action!
> 
> Stay foxy y'all!
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	14. Tourniquet

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_14_

* * *

*** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS DEPICTIONS OF VIOLENCE AND THEMES OF TORTURE...ALSO HEAVY LANGUAGE IS USED IN THIS CHAPTER. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ***

* * *

Alice didn't know how much time had passed as she lay on the cold concrete floor. Bucky – _no,_ the _Winter Soldier_ – stood in the center of the room blank and unblinking and awaiting orders. She couldn't stop the tears that streamed down her face as the last few hours hit her.

Once Bucky had been recalibrated, Pierce had thought it would be fun to use her as the soldier's personal sparring bag watching with sick fascination as she would stagger to her feet after each blow, her mutation overworking in such a way that it was barely managing to keep her alive. It had been like his own personal viewing of _Fight Club_ and not the climactic moment where Jack beats himself up in the office in an attempt at getting his revenge on his abusive boss, but rather the terrifying moment where Jack realizes that he and Tyler are the same person. Each hit made her heart break further and not because of who he was, but because of what HYDRA had done to him. She began a cycle of blaming herself for not looking into his death further and wondering if she had taken the time would she have found him before they had?

When Pierce had finally had his fun he had stopped the soldier, ordering him to back off before he had knelt beside her, "When I win," He had said as he grabbed a fistful of her matted hair and forced her to look at him through swollen and bruised eyes, "and I _will_ , I will resubmit you to experimentation and we will find a way to use your blood to unlock the road to immortality. HYDRA will become absolute…I've already got some fun ideas."

She had spat at him and told him to go to hell before he had slammed her head back into the concrete floor and fixing his suit. She hadn't remembered any physical sensation after that until what felt like hours later realizing belatedly she had died again. The thought had filtered through her groggy mind that it thankfully hadn't actually been Bucky that had killed her, but Pierce and as macabre and awful as the thought was it brought her a small amount of comfort to know that, perhaps, there was a small part of Bucky - _her Bucky_ \- that was still in there and trying to fight to the surface.

Glancing down at her hand she sighed softly to see that her mutation had stopped healing her superficial cuts and contusions in favor of her more serious wounds; the ribs, punctured lung and crushed pelvis had taken precedence and that wasn't even the beginning of the long list that she had accrued. She sighed softly, turning her forehead into the rough concrete below her and sighing in near relief as the cool stone met her feverish skin, her mutation eating up all of her available energy. The fever was just an unfortunate side effect of her healing and was a minor inconvenience as it caused a splitting headache when her body was pushed passed normal limits. She could take bullets all day but broken or shattered bones, torn tissue, ruptured organs and shredded muscle took much longer for her to stitch back together and her body could only do so much before it began to cause complications in other areas.

She knew she wouldn't be able to make any escape attempt so long as the Winter Soldier stood watch, but she studied each and every agent that had been left behind and knew that if she was clever enough she could probably get out. She ignored the agents who whispered about her as she pushed herself up slowly and settling herself against the table that had been overturned when she had been tossed back. Panting with effort she settled herself before rearranging her legs to make herself more comfortable and allow her body to reassemble in a more accurate sense and then she had to wonder how long she would have a limp for.

Her spine ached with the effort it took to keep her upright and she coughed suddenly, spitting a clot of blood to her side as her lungs started getting rid of the blood that had pooled there from her pierced lung and she knew she was lucky because if it had collapsed it would have only taken longer for her to breathe correctly. Shaking the thoughts away and pushing them to the back of her mind she began taking in the area she was in and attempting to comb through things she could use to either escape or let the others know she was safe. Pierce had given her information to work with and knowledge that the others had survived, which had lifted a weight she hadn't realized she had been carrying. He had also made the mistake of telling her at least part of HYDRA's plan for her, something she was going to be sure to take care of as soon as she could. Grunting with effort she kicked her leg out and ignoring as eyes followed her movements.

She jumped when a loud clang echoed around her and she looked up to see an agent scowling down at her, "Stay down, freak." As they walked away she clenched her teeth, her nostrils flaring.

"Yeah," She grumbled, "fuck you too, pal."

She vaguely heard a walkie-talkie go off in the distance before watching as the Soldier strode forward and out of sight and Alice knew that it was all a waiting game. Now that he was gone she knew the agents wouldn't do anything and that they would inevitably being to relax. She could kill them easily, but if he returned she knew putting a bullet in his head would be much harder and she buried that thought violently before shifting again, her eyes catching one agent in particular that seemed different to the rest.

They stood off to the side, their face hidden by the shield of the helmet they wore. It wasn't their posture or the hand on their gun that tipped her off to something being amiss about the character, but rather that they were ignoring the others around them and not interacting. Her brow arched in question when the figure moved a hand, raising a finger in front of their face as if telling her to be quiet. Still confused she nodded and returned her focus to healing, not bothering to waste the energy thinking about the strange interaction for a prolonged period of time. At this point they could have been Santa Claus and she wouldn't have been impressed.

At the very least she knew she needed to be able to walk and breathe and so she focused her attention on those two points. Sometime later she found the pain that had wracked her body was beginning to ebb slightly and she arched her back to pop the vertebrae back into place before her eyes sought out the figure again to see that they were no longer standing across the way, but was leaned against the side of her cell. She watched as the person shifted closer to the bars and she saw the handle of a gun held aloft in the hand that was positioned behind their back and nearly in between the bars. She realized belatedly that they were offering it to her and she didn't take long to consider it before snatching it and opening fire on the agents in the room, the disguised agent assisting her as they stepped off to the side and began fighting with another one of the HYDRA members and Alice quickly shot out the lock, ignoring the ricochet of the bullet as it hit her arm before slamming the door open and engaging the first agent she could find.

Her first opponent stood nearly a foot taller than her and was not wearing the issued helmet and so it left their entire face exposed and Alice was not foolish enough to let the opportunity go unexploited. She slammed her gun into their nose, exposing their throat long enough to land a solid punch before she kicked the agent into the wall and shooting immediately and turning her attention to the next person. She smirked, grabbing the night-stick from the fallen opponent before swinging it with as much force as her battered form could manage, making sure that her strikes counted and that she was relying more on speed than on pure unadulterated anger, but it was hard to ignore the heat prickling at the back of her neck.

Following through with her strike she stole a knife from her opponent's vest and stabbed it into their neck before moving on. She found the keys for her shackles and made quick work with removing them before moving on and killing agents as she went. Slowly the room became bathed in blood, but Alice wasn't fully satisfied. She turned her gaze to the scientists before glowering.

"Please! You don't have to do this."

"Actually I do," She remarked as her eyes blazed with barely contained rage. "This is for Bucky you assholes." Three shots found home in each of their heads before she aimed her gun at the still disguised agent, watching as they slowly raised their hands in surrender. "Get that thing off your head…I wanna see your face if I'm gonna shoot you."

"You're not going to want to shoot me," The feminine voice replied and Alice had to withhold her snort of disbelief, making sure to keep her form as straight as possible despite wanting to curl in on herself. "I'm here to help."

"Prove it," She snarled, "unlike me - I shoot you, you're dead and that's _if_ I'm feeling generous."

The woman's hands remained raised, as Alice was certain that the figure was a woman, before motioning to the helmet. Alice's eyes narrowed, her hand clenching around the neck of the gun and watching as the agent removed the helmet and dropped it on the floor next to her and returning her hands to the air. She was pretty with an ovular face, pale skin and dirty-blonde hair. Her grey eyes stared back at the mutant with care as she remained as still as possible. She was thin, Alice could tell despite the uniform she wore, and tall…taller than the mutant's meager five foot. Taking in her features, Alice frowned softly.

"Why did you help me?"

"I'm not with HYDRA." She began, her face carefully blank though the mutant could detect the slight wince as if she regretted starting out with that sentence. "I'm a friend of Maria Hill's…I recently got back on assignment and found S.H.I.E.L.D shot to shit. I followed you here after intercepting chatter from Rumlow's team."

"Give me _one_ reason to trust you."

The woman sighed; her accent – British, Alice placed – was thick with her exasperation, "Because getting you out wasn't enough?" When Alice's finger twitched on the trigger the woman sighed softly, "Do you know how long you've been here?" When she didn't immediately answer the woman's trimmed brows quirked, "You've been here approximately 15 hours. Now I don't know about you, but I do believe this world is just about ready to go to shit unless we get over to the Triskelion and assist the Captain."

"What's your name?"

"Jodi Moore…Jo to friends."

"I'm gonna regret this," Alice said finally as she dropped her arm, leaning heavily as if suddenly boneless on the seat of the machine that had previous restrained Bucky. She frowned deeply at it before blinking as the woman came to her side and offered her a hand with a gentle smile.

"Of that, I've no doubt." She pulled the mutant to her feet and allowed her to regain her balance before frowning. "Are you going to be alright?"

"You know," Alice breathed with a humorless snort, "I am _so_ tired of people asking me that every time I've clearly had my ass handed to me."

"You put up a decent fight until they set the Winter Soldier –"

" _Bucky_."

"I'm sorry, what?" Jodi looked at the mutant confused and when she met her glare she nearly shuddered at the fury there.

"His _name_ is _Bucky_."

"I apologize," The blonde frowned, "I didn't mean to offend you…or him…Anyway, you did good until Pierce sent him after you." She considered the brunette before frowning. "Why didn't you fight back?"

Alice was silent as she allowed the woman to guide her out of what she was now realizing was a bank and she wanted to snort at the irony Pierce seemed to have before answering as they came to a car, "It's a long story."

"I've got time."

"No offense, I don't trust you enough to go explaining my life's story to you." She sniped before continuing, "It's personal."

"He's your weakness," Jodi surmised quickly and before the mutant could correct her. "I understand and I'll not pry…"

"Good," Alice sighed as she settled into the car, holding her side, "I don't feel like talking anyway."

Jodi regarded her before nodding as she turned the car on, "Take the time to recover. We're going to have to work fast if we want to help."

The mutant shrugged slightly before reclining the seat so she could rest easier and so that she could get deeper breaths. She slowly allowed herself to relax and before long she couldn't fight the lull of sleep as the car rocked beneath her.

**-0-**

**February 1943**

**Bologna, Italy**

Alice blew into her hands in an effort to generate heat to the glove-clad appendages and chase away the cold.

She was off-duty for the day, which had been a surprise, but their field hospital of recent was surprisingly empty – just a few men that were waiting on trucks to be sent back stateside and a few men with a cold due to the extreme fluctuations in the Italian winter air. The gunfights hadn't ceased completely, but even in the extreme cold it seemed that the Germans were unwilling to engage as this area was held strongly by the Allied forces. The 107th was quiet and many men went about their rotations in watch and chores with ease, though rapidly to escape the bitter February chill that day. Inhaling deeply she took note of the crisp air and knew that they would have snow that afternoon or that evening at the latest and many of the other men who were from the more rural areas of the United States had agreed. Even Cook had taken the warning seriously, slaving over a stew for the better part of the afternoon in preparation for what they were sure was going to make an uncomfortable night. She had stepped just beyond the line of tents to where a small tree had fallen over and balanced her book in her blanket-clad lap.

The peace was nice and Alice knew better than to squander it and decided that the best idea was to read. The book that lay open on her lap was _The Hobbit_ by J.R.R. Tolkien, a recent gift to her from Daphne who had been on leave a few weekends prior. It originally had been a spoof gift of sorts, Daphne had admitted a few days after giving it to her, but she had felt awful when Alice had done nothing but express extreme gratitude. She had then explained to the other woman that it had been ages since she had received a gift and joke or not it had meant quite a lot to her. Fiona had then come back from her own leave a week later with a copy of _Pride and Prejudice_ by Jane Austin and a few pencils as the mutant was beginning to run low on utensils for her journaling. Alice hadn't the heart to tell the woman that she had actually read _Pride and Prejudice_ many times before, opting instead to keep it to herself and thank the woman for the gift. Johana, just last week, had come back to the 107th's camp with a copy of _Alice's Adventures in Wonderland_ by Lewis Carroll and a fresh new journal.

She had never felt so overjoyed or embarrassed before in her life, but the mutant had thanked her friends for their generosity all the same – exchanging each gift with a new remedy she had made from the local flora she had managed to accumulate before the weather turned. Daphne's gift had been perfumed oil that was Alice's specialty and made with lilies taken from Florence when the company had secured the city since the woman had constantly complained about the perfume she had purchased in London before they had shipped her original field hospital out. Fiona was given a new herbal soap bar that she had made with lilies much like the ones taken from Daphne's perfume but had added lavender to the mix in an effort to comfort the woman as she struggled to sleep after her transport had been under mortar fire before reaching the 107th. Johana's gift was shampoo meant to condition the woman's thick and frizzy hair since the issued shampoo was rough on the scalp and meant merely to clean and had left the poor woman's natural curls damaged and scalp itchy and even more so in the winter air. Alice had made it from the issued soap and added essential oils such as rosemary, lavender and rose petals to give it fragrance as well as honey and tamanu oil. Their gifts had been labors of love, but considering the mutant hadn't had her own chance to go on leave, it had been the best she could manage at the time.

Alice originally was planned to have been on leave that upcoming weekend, but it had been rescinded with the forecast promising nasty weather for travel. She hadn't minded, in fact, she had taken the time to socialize a bit with her fellow soldiers and nurses while also looking into other plants that she could use now that much of the available foliage was frozen or covered in mud or snow. Her eyes moved along the words written on the pages, allowing herself to escape from the reality around her and into the lands of orcs, hobbits, elves and dwarves where the largest threat of danger took the form of a treasure-seduced dragon. Alice had to admit that she much preferred the modern literature as the stories from her time were boring at best in comparison.

"What's got you hiding all the way out here?"

A small scream left her lips as she jumped, the book and blanket tumbling off of her lap in her surprise. She hadn't heard anyone coming behind her, so engrossed was she in the story. Turning to look behind her she narrowed her eyes at the face of Sergeant James Barnes and rolled her eyes. He looked deeply apologetic for startling her, but there was laughter behind his eyes - as there always seemed to be, the man was simply infuriating in his humor and suave charisma - and she grumbled to herself as she snatched the book from the ground at her feet, brushing the ice and snow from the book's cover delicately.

"I apologize, Doll, didn't mean to scare ya."

She nearly snorted at him, but decided against it. He was at least _attempting_ to be a gentleman and it did appear as if he truly hadn't meant to scare her. "It's alright…just didn't hear you coming was all."

"What'cha doin' out here?"

"Trying to escape for a while," She answered softly and gesturing to the book that she held aloft in her hands. "Thought to actually escape, if you catch my meaning."

His eyes glittered despite the overcast morning and she couldn't help but admire their shade: an almost impossible icy blue with hints of grey that made them appear as if they were snow-capped mountains. He stood before her with his hands tucked into the pockets of his leather jacket and dressed in his issued uniform, a dark sweater pulled over the ensemble beneath the jacket to keep him warm. She had assumed he kept his hands in the coat pockets merely to shield his fingers and maintain heat as opposed to a casual action, but after catching his hand fiddling with something there - his fingers moving in an anxious motion as if playing with something - she quickly deduced the man's confidence in approaching her was more out of genuine curiosity than another attempt at garnering her affections. His dark hair was brushed neatly back from his face and allowed his sharp features to stand out and it appeared as if he had recently shaved. His posture tall but mindful of her smaller stature and the way he had seemingly scared her, his hip slightly clocked and his legs spread shoulder width and forming a triangle as if the stance was one he fell into naturally and she admired the strength there. Her attention snapped back to his face when he cleared his throat almost awkwardly.

"What're ya reading?"

She glanced down at the book in her hands before hugging it against her chest, " _The Hobbit_. Daphne picked it up for me a few weeks ago and I've only managed to get time to read it now."

"Wasn't sure anyone else around here was much into reading fantasy."

"It's much better than Shakespeare, I'll grant you," She giggled before clearing her throat anxiously. "Besides, since leave was canceled this weekend I've got nothing else to hunker down with. Decided that a break from reality was worth it for a while. Do you read as well?" Immediately catching the implied insult in her own words she stumbled over her next statement, "that's not to say you _don't_ read, that's rather ridiculous and _presumptuous_ of me to assume, but rather what I meant to ask was that you read fantasy as well, but... _damnit_...I'm sorry...I'm erm not making this any better, please forget I said anything."

He shook his head, his one hand leaving the comfort of his pocket and raising it in a placating manner, his other hand still tucked away and playing with something unseen, "Nah, s'okay...no need to worry about it I knew what you meant." He smiled then, a small lift to the corner of his mouth that softened the entirety of his features. "I don't get to read much myself anymore given this whole mess, but I always enjoyed fantasy novels...was more into science and historical fiction, but always liked a good fantasy. _The Merry Adventures of Robin Hood_ by Howard Pyle was a personal favorite growing up. Also really enjoyed _Brave New World_ by Aldous Huxley but...that book isn't for everyone. My sisters hated it, but they also tended to like books that were more romantic I guess...though they did have a thing for the _Doctor Dolittle_ series by Hugh Lofting and I can't say I didn't enjoy them either." Bucky shrugged, his shoulders lifting easily with the motion, " _The Sword in the Stone_ by T.H. White has always been a good one - kinda a historical fantasy of sorts...actually have it back at camp if you ever wanna read it."

"That's very thoughtful of you," She returned his easy smile, her body relaxing immediately after he had said he hadn't taken offense to her words and accepted her rambling apology. "Thank you."

"Sure," He nodded. "No strings attached, I promise."

Her grin turned coy, "I hadn't assumed you had stipulations to borrowing a book." When a poleaxed expression appeared on his face she giggled, "I'm joking, I promise. I don't have many books...just this one and two others: _Pride and Prejudice_ and _Alice's Adventures in Wonderland_ should you ever feel a need to exchange." When she had listed off the last title a wide grin split his lips and she couldn't help but smile as well.

" _Alice's Adventures in Wonderland_? Isn't that a bit on the nose, Doll?"

That was the second time he had called her _Doll_ and while she normally would rebuke the use of the pet name and correct it, she decided to let this one go. For the first time in months they were having a relatively pleasant conversation and she didn't want to insert her foot any further into her mouth than she already had.

"I said so myself, but Johana insisted upon it."

Bucky chuckled, watching the grin that spread across her features and softening the stoic lines she drew upon to shield her features most days. This was perhaps the most he had seen her expressions in months when she wasn't purposely avoiding him. "Don't mind the romance genre much," he admitted earning a quirked brow from the nurse as if she were anticipating him to say something offensive and he chuckled again, "had a house full 'o women so had to pick up a romance once or twice just to have somethin' to do. We didn't have much so we had to get by with what we _did_ have and my Ma enjoyed a good romance. She was fond of Austin as a writer so I've read a few of her books before."

She blinked in surprise to the admission and allowed her body to relax, "Was it just you and your sisters then?"

"Yeah...Dad passed away because of a freak accident, so it was the four of us, Ma and my best pal, Stevie." He grinned suddenly, gesturing to her, "You actually remind me a bit of him."

"I'm not sure whether or not to take that as a complement, Sergeant," she replied with amusement.

"It is, I promise. Best fella I've ever known even if he don't realize it half the time."

Bucky studied the smaller woman. Her hair – which she normally wore pinned back – was left down and fell in loose waves and not the careful curls that most women sported, he noticed immediately, her light fringe curtained her forehead and fell just above her hazel eyes. She wore a thick leather jacket that appeared to be a size too large and a scarf around her neck and a dark cream sweater was tugged over her green issued button up, the lips of the collar wide and framing the column of her throat. She looked comfortable despite the issued army pants and boots, a true beauty if he had ever seen one especially against the frozen Italian backdrop.

"Do you mind if I sit with you?"

Her brow arched beneath her fringe, but she nodded slowly and shifted to the side to allow him to sit on the blanket she had placed over the log in an effort to keep her bottom dry and rearranging the second blanket to cover their laps. Bucky settled next to her and quirked a brow at her, his lips pulling into a friendly smile. Alice shifted slightly before gesturing to the book in her hands, "Did you want to read as well?"

"What's it about?"

"It's a fantasy novel written by J.R.R. Tolkien...but you already seemed to know that, obviously." She began softly, her gloved fingers playing with the edge of the pages, "It focuses on a Hobbit –"

"A what?"

"A Hobbit," She reiterated slowly, wondering if he was pulling her leg or not. Seeing his attentive expression she realized he was genuinely curious, "it's a fictional creature that he created. They're not dwarves, but they're…like humans. Just smaller and with harry feet." She giggled at the look on his face, clearing her throat when his lips began to curl, "Anyway, the story is about Bilbo Baggins, a Hobbit of the Shire. You see, he's a simple creature who enjoys the quiet of life and the peaceful hills that make up his home where the sun shines and life goes on in bliss for there's no need to travel any further than his pantry or cellar to fulfill his needs. But then a wizard appears at his doorstep and offers him the chance at adventure! Of course, he declines, because _why_ would he need to go adventuring when he's got everything he needs right in his own home? But the wizard, Gandalf, is unperturbed and is confident that Bilbo will want to join him and the dwarves – the party of Thorin Oakenshield – to recover untold riches from a mountain called Erebor."

"Isn't it a children's book?"

"Yes, but it's so much more than that!" She cried aghast, eyes shining with passion as she explained the book to him.

Bucky's lips spread into a small contented smile as she began hurriedly explaining the book to him once more, careful in her details as she recounted what she had managed to read of it before he had disturbed her. Normally she would studiously ignore him, their first interaction leaving a poor taste in her mouth and just as much as his. He had thought her to be just like any other dame: charmed, flirtatious perhaps and maybe a little bit ditsy, but Alice Alexander was no regular dame. No, she was sharply intelligent with a temper to match, she was wildly unpredictable and she valued her studies over her looks – something he had overheard Daphne, Johana and Fiona laughing about a few months earlier, though not unkindly.

The nurses of the 107th were fiercely loyal to one another and they didn't take any of the men's shenanigans be it at mess hall or in the field hospital. They were the Iron Ladies of the 107th and Alice was their Witch Doctor and the Hellcat of the Western Front. It was hard not to have noticed her arrival, given the scene she had caused due to finding Fred Reeves as her transport had come through what had remained of the 107th's battle the day prior. She had begun ordering men around like she had been there her entire life and while it had saved Private Reeves's life, it hadn't made her incredibly popular and least of all with Colonel Phillips, though the two seemed to have found each other at an impasse. Alice was too good at what she did to be dismissed or court marshalled for her know-it-all attitude as if she had more experience than any of them did. Though, it stood testament to her aptitude and tenacity as she proved time and time again that her knowledge was not something she learned for the war, but was something she had acquired through countless years of practice.

Could Alice be acerbic and abrasive? Yes and he had been on the receiving end since he had promptly inserted his own foot into his mouth by assuming she was just another dame. She wasn't perfect, but she was _Alice_ and despite being put off by her attitude initially he respected the boundary that she placed. She demanded respect and those that had gotten to know her understood that she wouldn't tolerate being treated as if she were less than any other man wearing the uniform. He could genuinely say that he respected her and he saw a lot of his best friend in her small stature.

He watched as she continued to explain the book, her hands gesturing and cheeks rosy with the cool air that licked at their exposed skin.

He suddenly wanted to know everything about her. What she liked, what she disliked, her hopes and her dreams. He wondered if any of them were much like his or if they mirrored his own inspirations. He had heard the other nurses saying that morning that they worried for Alice because she never received letters from home or had any personal items besides her botany journal and a notebook full of medical notes as well as the small gifts that they had brought back for her. He wondered if she had a family, his mind immediately bringing himself to the conversation they had just had. She hadn't elected any information about herself - something that he noticed she did often. She would listen as everyone around her would talk about their families and their homes, what their dreams were or hopes for the future and the people they had left behind to be a part of something so much bigger than themselves, but she had always remained silent. She didn't allow anyone too close or to know too much, merely let them assume what they wished of her and didn't do anything to correct those assumptions so long as they were harmless.

As she smiled at him, his heart all but stopped beating in his chest as her slightly chapped lips spread to reveal perhaps the first true smile he had ever seen cross her pretty features and a row of white teeth. Her eyes, a bright hazel that appeared more ochre with her lightheartedness, were arched with the dimples that pushed her cheeks upwards and shone brilliantly with the swelling descriptions of the story she was summarizing for him. As soon as she returned her gaze to the book in her lap, his heart began beating against the cavern of his chest almost violently and it was in that moment he realized he wanted the woman behind the aloof mask she normally wore.

"Well? Do you want to read it with me or…"

An olive branch.

"Please," He agreed immediately, his smile kind. She blinked at him in surprise to his eagerness, her cheeks flushing darker and his smile widened in victory. "Now…about this Bilbo fella…"

The nurse shifted the book so he could read along with her; the two huddled together against the chill in the air and reading about a fantastical world that was so vastly different than the one they had been living in for the past few months. He caught the scent in her hair as it lashed against him from the wind, clove and vanilla snaring him pleasantly and she apologized softly, tucking her hair behind her ear in an effort to prevent the wind from carrying it again. Bucky had smiled at her, the look softening the sharp angles of his face and had murmured that it was alright and that he didn't mind before allowing them to delve back into the story.

In that moment, the Sergeant and the Nurse didn't have to worry about anything but the adventure leaping at them from the pages of a children's novel.

**-0-**

Steve's brow creased with worry.

The night before Maria Hill had cast a net out in hopes of pinning where Rumlow's team had taken Alice only to have complete radio silence. She hadn't been able to find her and even with Natasha helping after she had gotten the bullet wound taken care of – Steve nearly laughing when he had seen the patch job Alice had done as it was scarily similar to how she dealt with medical during World War II – there was nothing.

He knew he shouldn't have been as worried as he was, her mutation would protect her for the most part, but he knew that she was terrified of becoming an experiment again and he was certain that HYDRA had plans of the like in store for the former nurse. Fury had confirmed as much when he noticed she hadn't been rescued with he, Sam and Natasha and the director had told Maria that finding her was a priority. Things had been tense, but Steve had to focus.

He, Sam and Maria snuck easily into the Triskelion and made their way into the central control room where they would be launching the Insight helicarriers. The hard part was now up to Sam and Steve to help whatever agents weren't compromised by HYDRA. It was going to be a blood bath and not one he felt completely comfortable with as they stopped at the door.

"You ready for this?"

Steve glanced at Maria and nodded slowly, "As I'll ever be…" Sam and Maria shared a look before the former Pararescuer frowned softly.

"We'll find her; man…I promise you…we'll get her back."

"Her and Bucky," Steve frowned, his resolve hardening as he met the man's eyes. It took a moment before he nodded back but when he did they knew they were about ready to kick the hornet's nest. "Let's get started."

Maria nodded and released a sonic wave from the device in her hand, the group waiting before a tech answered the door and immediately the agent and veteran had guns trained on the man. He raised his hands in surrender before stepping aside.

"Excuse us."

They made quick work of dispatching any techs, Maria shooting anyone who resisted and sending whatever techs were still with S.H.I.E.L.D to help round up others. Maria adjusted the microphone and smirked. "It's all yours, Cap."

He nodded before pressing down on the intercom, "Attention, all S.H.I.E.L.D agents. This is Steve Rogers. You've heard a lot about me over the last few days, some of you were even ordered to hunt me down." He chuckled humorlessly, "But I think it's time you know the truth. S.H.I.E.L.D is not what we thought it was, it's been taken over by HYDRA. _Alexander Pierce_ is their leader. The Strike and Insight crew are HYDRA as well. I don't know how many more, but I know they're in the building. They could be standing right next to you. They almost have what they want: absolute control. They shot Nick Fury and it won't end there. If you launch those helicarriers today, HYDRA will be able to kill anyone that stands in their way, unless we stop them. I know I'm asking a lot, but the price of freedom is high, it always has been, and it's a price I'm willing to pay. And if I'm the only one, then so be it. But I'm willing to bet I'm not."

Sam stared at the patriot's back and clearing his throat, "Did you write that down first…" the patriot turned to stare at him and he continued with a small smile, "or was it off the top of your head?"

"They're initiating launch," Maria frowned as she began working at the computer.

Steve shot the man an amused glance before frowning as he looked down at the computer, "Hill, what is that?" The woman looked at the computer and pressed the screen blinking, her heart stopping and glancing at the other two men they weren't much better.

" _Hey guys_ ," Alice offered a weak smile, her voice raspy and weak and Steve immediately took in her bruised and cut up face and neck and he felt anger crawling beneath his skin, " _You got room on that party bus for two more?_ "

"Two?" Sam questioned. "Alice, you look like hell."

" _Feel like it too_ ," She chuckled humorlessly. " _I got lucky that we have friends all over the place. Anyway, me and Agent Jodi Moore are on our way and I'd like to personally shoot someone…preferably HYDRA someones, but there's still plenty on the table to choose from._ "

Sam nearly laughed, but his horror overpowered any humor he could have had in that moment, Maria seemed much the same but a look at Steve told him that Captain America was barely containing a rarely used temper.

"Alice… _who_ did it?"

Her gaze shifted and she sighed, " _Rumlow's friends helped an awful lot but it was all orchestrated by Pierce._ "

"Alice."

" ** _He_** _…was ordered to…by Pierce._ "

Sam gaped. Steve had been forced to tell the small group why she had frozen when the Winter Soldier's face had been revealed – the patriot's situation was more understandable, but Alice's hadn't been and so the patriot had given an abridged version that had gotten the point across that the Winter Soldier was Alice's seemingly long dead significant other who had apparently come back from the grave thanks to HYDRA. At the time, Sam had nearly laughed at the irony, but knew enough not to as the situation couldn't have been more dire. From what he had also informed them, Alice's mutation worked strangely in that her body would heal the worst of her injuries first before the superficial ones. So, if she still looked like she had fought her way out of a meat grinder and lost then he could only let his imagination picture how badly she had truly been injured. When asked how he knew about all of this he had simply said that he mutant had taken time to tell him. Sam felt anger flare to life beneath his skin the anger burning through his veins like liquid mercury, but the strained anger in Steve's posture was enough to tell him that he wasn't the only one.

" _Look,_ " She frowned, her voice tired as her eyes narrowed from behind two black eyes, " _Steve, look at me._ " When his gaze turned up at her she sighed, " _He remembered…briefly he remembered who we were. I don't know if there's any hope for him, but I have to believe there is. He tried to stand up to Pierce and he didn't want to do any of this…They programmed him…wiped his returning memory like it was nothing and I'm willing to bet this isn't the first time_ ," She corrected herself pausing as she collected herself, " _Steve, we've got to try…I **know** Bucky's in there somewhere._"

"I'm angry as all hell, Alice," The patriot frowned and the woman seemed to blink at his phrasing, "but I never had any intention of giving up on him." When he saw her smile, the cut on her lip pulling and making the smile look more like a grimace, he sighed. "How far out are you?"

" _Far enough that I won't be able to get on the helicarriers…from where we are. It looks like they're about to go airborne, but we're close enough to get inside and cover what S.H.I.E.L.D agents we can find._ "

Steve nodded, "We're on channel seven."

" _Copy that and guys…be careful. Bucky was recalled just before Jodi was able to help me escape and I'm assuming it's Pierce's attempt to stop you by any means necessary…he's purposely looking to make us and Bucky hurt…they didn't put his mask back on so they want his face visible which means they're either overly confident that his memories won't resurface **or** they're going to use him as a scapegoat if they fail._"

"I'll keep it in mind, Allie…be careful."

" _Give 'em hell, Rogers._ " She disconnected the link and without speaking the two men sprinted out of the room, knowing that time was limited for them to get on those carriers before they took off.

Alice glanced at the agent driving and nodded. Jodi had helped her find her weapons and the mutant had wasted no time in refitting herself with the familiar weights and the two had immediately set off. It hadn't left much time for her to change clothes, but the blonde agent had managed to find her a Kevlar turtleneck, ignoring when Alice had simply pulled her old shirt over her head and exposing the full extent of damage done to her including the ugly scarring on her side and the brand on her inner arm. She had rolled the sleeves of her bomber jacket up to her elbows, leaving the black material down to cover her arms before tucking it into the fingerless gloves that Jodi had provided to her. Feeling as refreshed as she could she kept her attention on the quickly approaching S.H.I.E.L.D building and ignoring as the helicarriers took flight in the distance.

"You ready for this?"

"As I'll ever be," Alice replied as she cocked her handgun. "Let's make ourselves a battering ram." Jodi eyed her and smirked before shifting gears and hitting the gas allowing them to speed forward. They didn't stop when the car hit the steps before plowing through the front doors of the building, glass easily breaking around them and it was a short moment before bullets began hitting the side of the car. Jodi allowed the car to skid to a stop before hopping out and beginning to open fire, Alice quickly joining her.

" _Is that you making all that noise_!?"

Alice hit her earpiece and smirked, "I thought dramatic was the way to go, Hill…besides, the Avengers do it all the time!"

" _Well stay sharp_! _You've got runners inbound_."

"Sending me presents?"

" _I figured a welcome back was in order_."

Alice snorted in her humor before returning her handgun to her side and unraveling her rope dart and joining the other agent in the fray. The weighted end swung and the mutant didn't waste time as she hit the side of the command stick and releasing the small blades that had been built into it, the long cylinder becoming much more lethal than the typical blunt force object she preferred as it cut through her opponents. Chancing a glance at Jodi she noticed the woman using two short staffs, her moves practiced with years of experience shown in every strike that made contact with a person she was facing. Her chain swung and she twisted before kicking the end of the blade forward, sending the lethal end swinging through more HYDRA agents.

The two women began fighting their way around the side of the room before taking cover behind an overturned desk when Jodi glanced at the mutant to see her wrapping her chain back up and disengaging the blades on the end of the dart. She then looked out of the large floor to ceiling windows of the lobby and noticing a helicopter parked out beyond the exterior.

"Alice," She whispered smacking the mutant's arm and ignoring the glare the smaller woman shot her, "a chopper…"

"What about it?"

"Get up there…" Jodi motioned for where they saw Sam flying around and avoiding a bogey hot on his tail. "They need you more than I do."

"But –"

"Look I get it, you want to eradicate HYDRA for what they did to you and your beau, but you've gotta focus on the bigger picture here."

Alice's nostrils flared in her annoyance, "I get the feeling you just want to take these assholes yourself."

"Partially yes," Jodi answered quickly with unabashed enthusiasm, "but more so because you're like them and this one isn't your fight… _up there_ is."

The mutant glanced between the agent and the helicarriers above before seemingly making up her mind as she poked the woman in her shoulder, "You die on me Jodi and we're gonna have a problem."

"Go and help Cap, I got this."

Alice didn't waste any time, ignoring when Jodi popped out from behind the desk to cover her as she sprinted for the door leading outside. Once there she slid quickly into the helicopter and not bothering to question why it was there before beginning her launching sequence.

" ** _Hey, Sam, I'm gonna need a ride_**!"

" _Roger!_ " Sam replied over the comms, " _Let me know when you're ready!_ "

There was an explosion on the side of one of the helicarriers, " ** _I just did!_** "

Alice frowned, glancing briefly out of the front windshield and watching as Sam took a nose dive before catching what she could only assume was Steve before returning her focus to getting the helicopter airborne. Flipping more switches she began the process of setting up her launch, not even flinching as the blades whirled to life. "I found a chopper and I'm on my way."

" _Good timin', Alice!_ " Sam's voice laughed. " _You know, you're a lot heavier than you look._ " Alice smirked at the banter, the last phrase could only be directed at Steve as they had disappeared over the side of another helicarrier, familiar with the typical dark humor they all had during battle and frowning as her monitors showed that some of the systems were offline which would make her only good enough for transport.

Steve's voice echoed next, " ** _I had a big breakfast._** "

There was brief radio silence before she heard scuffling in her ear piece and frowned up when she notice Sam fighting someone on board and Alice pushed her wheel forward and pulled up just as she got enough speed for takeoff.

"Alright, I'm airborne, boys."

" _Good! Your boyfriend showed up_!" Sam's voice grunted and she circled towards where she had seen them disappear. " _Cap? Cap, come in. Are you okay?_ "

" ** _Yeah, I'm here! I'm still on the helicarrier._** " Steve grunted, " ** _Where are you?_** "

" _I'm grounded, suits down. Sorry, Cap_."

" ** _Don't worry, I got it._** "

"On my way," She frowned. "Hold tight, Sam."

" _You got it._ "

She pulled up alongside of the man's position before opening the hatch and nodding for him to climb in. When he did Alice struggled with herself. As much as she wanted to help, she knew that too many hands were not always the most helpful ones and she frowned. Sam watched her as she circled the helicopter back to ground, taking in her appearance with sad eyes.

She was sporting multiple cuts on her face alone with spots that seemed to still be bleeding slightly, particularly from her hairline. Both of her eyes were ringed in dark purple and her left cheek was swollen and pushing roughly against her vision and she had a line of bruises against the side of her jaw and he could make out the appearance of finger shaped bruises against the column of her throat before disappearing beyond the neck of her shirt where he could only assume she was not her normal pallor. She met his eyes and he took in the split lip and road rash-like scrape along the right side of her face, however, her eyes looked haunted as if she was gone for much longer than she had been and troubled.

"Alice…I'm so sorry."

She shook her head, "It doesn't matter right now…"

"It _does_ matter," He frowned at her and stepped back slightly when she flinched, a small flicker of fear entering her eyes and it only saddened him more. "Al, it matters a lot. We couldn't find you…"

"It's done, Sam," Her voice sounded stronger than she looked and he fell silent as her jaw worked. "I don't know what to do…I _can't_ kill him…I can't. But I don't want to be useless either…"

"Then fight." When she shot him a glare he held his hand up to cease her ire, "Just…let Cap take this one…we'll clear out the rest of these goons and get outta here…"

"But…"

"Alice, I know you were told to help us and that it was covered, but we're needed down here. There are people still in that building that could really use our help."

Alice frowned softly before nodding slowly, both nearly jumping when Maria's voice cut through the comms. " _Falcon, Hellcat?_ "

"Yeah?"

" _Rumlow and Rollins are headed for the Council_ …"

When Alice's face set into a vicious scowl he nodded at her, "Al and I are on it." The two made fast work of exiting the small aircraft and racing back into the compound. Sam looked at the woman next to them as they moved, "Which one do you want?"

"As much as I'd love to put a bullet between Rumlow's eyes…I'll take Rollins. He and I have some unfinished business."

"Good then, I'll take Rumlow."

" _Rumlow is on the 41st floor…and Rollins is on the 10th._ "

"Got it," She replied before nodding to Sam and disappearing. As she ran she reactivated her comm, "Hill, do you know from what direction?"

" _South side of the building_."

Alice slammed open her door leading to the 10th floor and smirked when she hit the man she was looking for with the end of it before glaring at him. "Hey _sweetheart_ you left our date a bit early."

"I'm gonna gut you like a fish."

"Make my day jerkwad."

He ran at her with a roar and she sidestepped and quickly removed her rope dart from its holding. While shooting him would be faster she wanted to prove to herself that she could actually win a fight and while it wasn't the most important thing at that moment, it meant all the difference to her confidence fragile as it was. She swung the dart with as much force as she could, using her elbow to get a decent speed going as the heavy end pulled against each spin and she waited. She knew his main weakness would be his temper and she coached herself to stem her own so she could think clearly. She met his eyes and she could tell he was calculating his own moves before reaching to his side and removing the taser rod that he seemed so fond of, a wicked smirk twitching his lips.

"You're gonna wish you _could_ die, freak."

"Last I checked there usually isn't this much talking," She replied before snapping her dart out at the man and watching as he dodged, immediately pulling back on the chain and allowing it to maintain rotation around her body and snatching the dart out of the air as he closed the distance and blocking a strike from the rod.

She gathered the other end of the chain into her other hand, allowing the length to become taut in front of her body as he swung once more. Alice wasn't foolish and she allowed Natasha's teachings to come back to her quickly, forcing herself to ebb and flow with the natural movement of her opponent. She recalled Natasha telling her to fight dirty only if the opening presented itself and in this life or death situation, the mutant knew that this was that there was no better time. She switched her grip on the dart suddenly, inverting the hold and swiping at Rollins' face and nearly smirking when she connected, a line of red splitting his cheek from the cut she had made. Leaving him no time to think she changed her grip once more before kicking her leg forward with a snap and creating distance once again. Noticing his frustration sent a rallying cry through her system and she felt the surge of adrenaline as it came, utilizing it and snapping her chain out once more, extending the dart and using the strength of her legs as the dart went into another rotation around her body to kick it back out and faster. She was satisfied to note that he was taking significantly more damage than she and she counted it to be a small victory.

Growling he grabbed the chain and slammed his tasing rod to it, allowing the electricity to travel through the metal and into her hands. Alice would have dropped her weapon had it not been for the gloves she had been given, feeling the currant through her exposed fingertips but not enough to make her release. With a small cry she pulled her dart forward with more strength than she realized she could muster and Rollins apparently thought the same as the dart returned back to her. Alice glanced at her opponent and realizing that he was dangerously close threw herself onto a desk that had been vacant of its computer and rolling away from the large man. She twisted herself and stood as quickly as she could get her feet underneath her, not surprised when she found the man had followed her onto the top of the line of desks and she leapt to the next one in an effort to keep her distance as he attempted to sweep her legs.

As he went to close the distance, Alice spun her dart once more, the chain following her movement as she crouched and allowing the dart to snap out at his feet a movement he dodged as he leapt closer to her. Bringing up her right foot to block the rod, she used her left foot to kick his hand as she rolled away and backwards on the longer desk, her dart – still in motion – swinging back out as she snapped her arm forward at his face. He turned his body slightly, allowing the dart to sail passed him before spinning and swinging the rod in an arc as if to slam it down upon her and she shuffled backwards once more. She watched his movements carefully as he stumbled, nearly slipping and she shot her dart out once more, the weapon following her arm and catching him in the side on his way down. As his back hit the desk, Alice swing her arm in an arc, the weapon following the movement as she directed it downwards and frowning as it smacked the table where Rollins had once been. Recalling the dart with a sharp pull, Alice allowed the weapon to swing once again before catching it and preparing for the next bout only to grunt in surprise when the desk that separated the two of them came tumbling at her and hit her chest. She instinctively rolled backwards with the motion and caught herself when she sprung suddenly to her feet, the momentum still pulling her backwards and the mutant used it to bring her leg back to stabilize her stance.

Realistically Rollins had over ten years of training where she merely had two. She knew there was no way to bridge that gap of experience, but one thing she did know for certain was that she was far more clever than he and was more agile. She almost hoped Maria Hill would be able to access video so she could look at it later as she felt fairly confident despite the fear that wanted to burst from her chest and overtake her. _But_ , she reasoned to herself with dry humor, _you faced aliens in New York with a barely functioning team of superheroes…this guy's a cakewalk in comparison_. With this thought firmly placed in mind she sidestepped once again as he barreled after her, the man snatching too much of the chain from her hands and effectively disarming her. Cursing to herself she jumped over another table to create distance and frowned when he merely leapt after her tackling her to the ground. The mutant was quick to bring her leg up and across his chest to help change position and was surprised when she successfully managed to switch their places, aiming two jabs at his face without much thought.

Alice panted as she rolled off and away from her opponent and staggering to her feet. Her entire body was screaming at her from the strain it was being placed under and the many times she had been thrown into things within the last few hours, but she quickly pushed her ailments away as Rollins swung a mighty fist at her, just barely missing her face and nearly making her stumble as she attempted to dodge.

"What's the matter, _Sweetheart_!?" The HYDRA agent growled as he swung once more, a haymaker aimed towards the smaller woman's temple, "Getting tired already!?"

The mutant didn't have time to answer as he lunged forwards, catching her jacket in his hand as he broke through her defense. As the two hit the ground, Alice felt her breath leave her with the combined weight of Rollins and the force of the throw. She momentarily saw spots in her vision, if from her fall or Rollins' knife – that had quite seemingly appeared out of nowhere – sinking into her shoulder she had no idea, but it was enough for her to once again lower her defense enough for the larger man to swing a clenched hand at her cheek and she tilted her head to the side to avoid it and bringing the man's face closer than she would have liked. Natasha's training kicked back in and she heard the woman's voice in her head at that moment telling her it was time to fight dirty.

Holding back the whimper that wanted to escape she managed to crane her neck enough to allow her to sink her teeth into the man's ear, locking her jaw and tugging as hard as she could. The man released hold of his knife in favor of a howl of pain and Alice took the opportunity to swing herself from underneath him as he writhed and lock herself onto his back, her jaw still locked and tugging at his sensitive ear. She released her hold on his ear and made to grab at the back of his head, but Rollins was quicker and managed to unlock her arms and swing her violently into the side of an overturned desk before readjusting his grip and tossing her away. The mutant collided into two other desks before she came to an uneasy stop, managing to use the momentum to land on her feet, however, she miscalculated and wound up falling once more. She managed to sit up just in time for her opponent to jump her once more, the larger man easily taking her advantage away from his place on top of her.

His added weight and the location of where he sat made it extremely hard for the mutant to buck him off of her, her hips locked into the ground and leaving her only defense to be her hands, which quickly moved to her head to cover it from the sudden onslaught of fists that attacked her. It was only a matter of time before the HYDRA agent managed to break through her defenses and Alice knew she had to think quickly – one uppercut would manage to break whatever guard she had.

With this thought in mind, the smaller woman quickly found a rhythm to his strikes and at the last possible second she lashed out with a jab of her own, catching Rollins directly in his nose. A loud yelp passed his lips and caused his eyes to water just enough to give Alice an opportunity to fight him off of her, but she had not anticipated him recovering and she threw her arm up just in time to block the gruesome looking weapon he must have grabbed at some point during his onslaught that the mutant hadn't noticed.

With the agent's weight bared down on her and her arm she knew that she had gained only a slight leverage as he was more concentrated at digging the weapon into her arm and it made it much easier for her to strike him from the position she was now in and she did not miss the opportunity as she used her less-dominant hand to repeatedly strike out through her own howls of pain as the metal continuously dug deeper. He released her as anticipated after enough hits and Alice took this moment to use her freed dominant left hand to swing a punch at the side of his jaw in the form of a haymaker in order to effectively push him off. This did not work as well as she had hoped and since he had shifted higher onto her hips she was forced to use her legs to buck upwards, covering her face as the larger man was thrown over her and allowing her to slide out.

Rolling into a standing position, Alice glanced briefly at her arm and winced at the mangled appearance and she wondered vaguely if any of his attacks would leave scars. Turning her eyes to the staggering male she quickly moved, hoping to catch him off guard as she used a turned over chair for added height, catching the man around his neck with her legs and twisting in hopes to snap his neck and end the entire conflict, but it seemed as if the agent was once again one step ahead of her.

He rolled with the throw, albeit not as gracefully as he had seemingly intended as he landed on his back. Alice did not miss the new opening and brought her heel down in a solid hatchet kick at his chest, further winding him before kicking him in the side of the head. As she made to kick once more, the agent grabbed her foot and twisted and in order to prevent her ankle from snapping, the mutant rolled with it and directly into his next assault. Once again Alice found herself in a position that would not allow her a lot of leverage as his hands clasped around her throat. This time, she knew that she wouldn't be able to easily get herself out of this position as he was sitting on top of her and using the ground to brace her against. Had he been standing, she could have swung her legs up to dislocate his elbow, but now she was at a loss with very little wiggle-room. In theory, Alice knew that this would not kill her despite the black that was edging against her vision, but it let a whole slew of other fears settle into her rapidly heaving chest as she attempted to pull air into her lungs.

If she lost right at this moment there wasn't anyone to help her as everyone else was engaged in their own battles which would leave her one of two ways: first, the best scenario, being that she would simply be forgotten in the building passed out and left to heal; the second, the worst case scenario, being that Rollins stayed true to Pierce's orders and took her to HYDRA to be experimented on. While neither were good options she knew those were the only two realistic possibilities. Suddenly Clint's training came back to her. It had been a little less than a year into their training and Clint had informed her that her opponent was not always going to leave her in an easy position to get out of and had demonstrated a similar scenario. His instruction had been that if you couldn't get your legs around your opponent to push them off or your hands to grab at their elbows because they were already bent than to aim for the hands. The thumbs were the weakest part of a person's hand and as long as you had control of that digit the hand would lose strength in its grip. Immediately Alice reached for his thumb with her right hand and managed to pry it away from her neck with all the effort it seemed her body was able to produce before taking her left hand and striking him in the Adam's apple with her fingers, air rushing into her lungs suddenly as he sat straight up and away from her in an effort to get his own breath back before Alice managed to sit up and connect a winded haymaker at his face. She knew he wouldn't be down for long and immediately scrambled to her feet and jumping back as he swiped at her, grabbing his clawed weapon as he went.

"C'mere you _bitch_."

Alice immediately dodged, ignoring as her sore muscles protested the movement and slapped her hand out, hitting his wrist as hard as she could and watching as the weapon clattered to the floor before grabbing that hand and spinning against him, allowing her opposite elbow to slam into his temple and causing him to stumble away before she brought him back over her, using her hip to pull him completely over her head and into the table in front of them and dancing away once again. She counted her movements carefully, her mind suddenly calculating with her anger and she was suddenly very thankful to her friends for pushing her through the toughest training in her life. She sprung forward just as Rollins did and met him half way with a spinning hook kick that broke through his boxer-like guard before following with a series of punches, making sure to aim anywhere vital and to aim at the pressure points that she knew would help lower his defenses before she found her opening and brought her leg up, pushing all of her bodyweight forward and at his sternum. The kick itself missed the intended target due to Rollins' last-minute block, but it effectively lowered his guard and forced him to stumble again.

As suddenly as he stumbled he rebounded, catching her in the side of the head with a spinning back fist that blurred her vision. Without being able to catch herself, Rollins took that moment to strike and she felt herself fly through the air and roll away from him, her saving grace being a desk that stopped her movements enough to keep her from falling into the glass window behind her. She could feel his breath by her ear as he took a hold of her neck once more, lifting her into the air and holding her against the spider-webbed glass.

"It doesn't surprise me that you're so weak," He began through a raspy laugh, slightly breathy at the exertion of the fight. "Constantly letting your emotions get to you, letting the bonds you form with others be the deciding factor." He trailed off slightly, squeezing her already sore neck for emphasis. Alice gasped for air and clawed at his hands, "I'm gonna take your little friends away…starting with that Star-Spangled asshole. Then I'll take the Widow and that fly-boy and finish them off nice and slow, but you know who's going to take the cake, _Sweetheart_?" As she struggled for air he laughed, "I'm gonna skin that little Winter Soldier of yours alive and watch as your entire life comes crashing down around you!"

**_BANG_**!

Just as suddenly as Rollins' arm reared back, his eyes widened and his arm stopping its movements. Dropping her to the ground he staggered, his eyes wide as he turned to see that the mutant held his own gun in her hand, the nozzle smoking from the discharge. While he had been monologing Alice had dropped her one hand and grasped the gun in his holster and with all of the strength her body could muster she shot. She then leveled the gun at his forehead and frowned, her nostrils flaring.

"Sorry Rollins…but I'm not gonna let that happen." She then offered him a cruel smirk, her hazel eyes burning a molten cinnamon as she stared directly into his widened eyes. "Send my regards to the Devil, dickhead."

Before he could spout what she believed would be a _Hail HYDRA_ she set a bullet between his eyes.

As soon as he fell over dead the mutant's stance faltered and she leaned on a table to catch her breath for a moment. Shaking herself almost physically, she retrieved her fallen weapons before pressing her ear and noticing just now that her comm had been eerily silent to find that the piece was no longer in her ear. Frowning she searched for a moment, finding it on the floor near the door and refitting it to her ear before pressing again. Sounds exploded suddenly and she frowned as she attempted to figure out who was who.

Suddenly Alice heard a slam and looked briefly out of the window to see a shadow had hit the building and she didn't think as she sprinted to the window and removing her firearm. She shot wildly before throwing herself out of it and flailing her arms as her body moved through the air, glancing down and noticing the Potomac just below and was suddenly thankful that she would at the very least land in water. As she neared the surface she pointed her feet and crossed her arms before taking a deep gulping breath before sinking below the surface.

As she slowly found her momentum stopping she began to swim as fast as she could away from the building and further across the river to clear the helicarrier that was going down and soon she resurfaced gasping for breath and looking back when she felt herself far enough to see the helicarriers falling from the sky. Treading water she frowned, pressing her hand back to her ear in hopes of catching chatter and she was not disappointed.

" _Hill, where's Steve?_ " Natasha's voice carried through the comms, " _You got a location on Rogers!?_ "

" ** _He was in the helicarrier!_** "

" _Alice! Has anyone seen Alice!?_ "

She sputtered when the water splashed up into her face before activating the unit once more, "I'm out! I'm fine…decided to go for a swim."

" _Thank god!_ " She could've laughed at the relief in the Russian's voice but knew it would do nothing for either of them, instead she frowned.

"Has anyone heard from Steve!?"

" ** _Nothing since my last communication._** " Hill answered breathlessly, " ** _I'm meeting up with Moore and then we'll meet up with you_**."

" _Alice, need a lift?_ "

"No," She answered as she began swimming her way to shore, "I'm gonna stay grounded and see if I can find Steve…"

" **We'll search our side of the Potomac** ," Sam's voice breathily cut in, " **That's doable right?** "

She briefly heard what sounded like Fury's voice and she nearly sunk back into the water in shock before shaking her head and continuing her long swim to the opposite bank of the river. "Tell Fury he owes me hazard pay!"

Natasha laughed, " _You sure you don't want us to get you?_ "

"I'm good…You guys circle the air and I'll call when I find him."

" _Copy that._ "

Alice continued her swim, ignoring the pulling at her muscles as her mutation attempted to keep up with the strain and she knew she would be sleeping for a few days at least when she managed to get back to Virginia. She thought she deserved a vacation after this fiasco.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** So, we got some cute stuff here, some more angst and a few more Alice fight scenes. This arc in the story was so much fun to write because I love TWS timeline and they pack so much subtlety here that I felt compelled to honor at least some of it. For those wondering if I'm gonna cover the scene we see at the end of the movie...just wait for it ;)
> 
> I love you all so very much and hope you enjoyed this chapter. Fair warning it's gonna be angsty for a while as Alice recovers from these events, but we'll get more Steve angst, Nat scenes and Sam scenes along the way! Also, we're heading into an arc in the story that is partially of my own making as I really begin to lay on my own spin! I'm so excited for what's to come guys and I know I promise it every chapter but Bucky and Alice will get their moment! Slow-burns are always a pain, but I'll try and add little fluffy moments like the scene in this chapter ;)
> 
> As always I don't need reviews to update, but I'm always open to constructive criticism and areas where I can improve as well as just general discussion about the story so don't hesitate to let me know what you think!
> 
> Stay golden y'all!
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	15. Ashes

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_15_

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*** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS DEPICTIONS OF TRAUMA, PTSD AND SEQUENCES DEPICTING ANXIETY/PANIC ATTACKS. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ***

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Finally reaching the opposite bank after what felt like hours, Alice struggled for breath as she pulled herself onto the muddy earth and glanced up at the sky. Her entire body felt like lead and she had genuinely been surprised that she hadn't sunk to the bottom of the Potomac River. The sensation of pins and needles raced through her arms and legs and her chest heaved as she attempted to pull in more oxygen.

With hooded eyes she looked up into the early evening sky, the sun slowly beginning to trace its way beyond the horizon and she estimated she had merely a few hours left of light to find Steve. She ignored the distant sound of what remained of the helicarriers as the metal groaned and snapped, the fire still licking the frames of what had once been giant mobile aircrafts and a testament to HYDRA's failed attempt at world domination. As much as she wanted to move she knew she didn't have the strength to just yet. Exhaustion blanketed her and she felt its weight on her chest as she continued to draw in long and deep breaths. Though Alice could swim she didn't particularly enjoy fighting against what she believed to be the most organic element in the world and she was quickly beginning to remember why.

Her bruised body continued to ache and she fought through the fog in her mind to determine if she was going into shock or not before she decided that she was merely tired. Her mutation was working albeit slowly and it left the cuts she had sustained stinging and aching as she hauled herself further onto the bank with her arms. After pulling herself up to a point where half of her body was no longer partially submerged in water, she allowed the wail that had been building up in her chest to release, her breathing hitching as she struggled through physical and emotional anguish, yet no tears fell from her eyes.

She _wanted_ to cry, but didn't know if she could even manage tears.

"Alright, Alice, get it together…time to find Steve." She coached herself after what felt like an hour of laying face down in the mud along the bank of the river before slowly pulling herself into a kneeling position. She ignored the mud that caked across the front of her ruined shirt and huffed on her breath, a groan crawling its way up her throat as she staggered to her feet. Taking a few moments to regain her strength she allowed herself to feel each and every protest in her body before pushing out a forceful breath and beginning what was sure to be a long trek along the banks, her main priority now being Steve's welfare. She wasn't worried about running into any enemies at this point, doubting there would be any HYDRA survivors from the helicarriers that smoked in several places within the Potomac River and her mind briefly tugged towards if Bucky had made it out.

Shaking this thought immediately she refocused her attention to finding her friend, unfortunately, Bucky would have to wait.

Periodically she would hear small cracklings of life in her earpiece and would answer negatives as her friends asked if she had found him. Her only hope was that he had not been in the helicarriers that were steadily sinking below the river's surface and she ran a hand through her wet hair, dragging the water-logged and curling strands away from her face as she went. During her fall she had lost her hair tie and it left her tresses to hang about her shoulders in thick clumps and she immediately added a shower to her steadily growing list of things she would do after finding the patriot.

As the sun continued its steady decline towards the horizon, Alice began to worry if she would even find the patriot. Her mind whirling with possibilities. Had he survived the crash? Was he sinking below the choppy waters of the once calm river? Had he been conscious and swam his way back to shore and was merely waiting for pick up? She felt fear cling to her chest as she worried about him and as her body continued to ache she knew she had to push through it. She _needed_ to find him.

As she began to round another part of the river that was easily miles away from where she had first begun her trek, she heard bushes rustling and she frowned softly before limping forward. As she emerged from the other side of patches of long grass she stopped, her hands immediately raised as a confused and water-logged Bucky held her at gunpoint, the action completely reactionary though he didn't lower the weapon even when she presented her hands. Glancing downwards she noticed the unconscious patriot and she nearly sighed in relief. He was alive at the very least, in shock at the very worst.

Her eyes flickered back to the man who remained still as a statute, his gun trained on her and gun-metal blue eyes clearer than she had seen them last. Her heart immediately beat a wild symphony against her breastbone and she forced herself to swallow in an effort to dislodge her tongue from the roof of her mouth as she attempted to find words. With a quick glance back to Steve she took careful notice of his battered and bruised features, no doubt from fighting the other super-soldier, and was suffering a bullet wound through what Alice was sincerely hoping was not his stomach.

Bucky watched the tiny woman across from him with unwavering eyes, watching as her hazel gaze darted from him to the man he had dragged out of the river and then back to him. He hadn't realized there would be anyone else looking for him so soon, but taking a look at her water-logged appearance told him enough that she had swam her way there. He took in her bruises, some looking fresh and he remembered that he had done that to her, her small body seemingly breaking over and over again with every hit he had taken and he nearly wavered. None of his victims had ever come back to haunt him and what was worse was that she wore the face of a woman that fluttered about his memory like a ghost and his grip tightened on the neck of the firearm before he finally allowed his arm to drop. She wasn't a target. She wasn't the mission.

"Please…" Her voice seemed to crack, a gentle alto that tickled his ears like a gentle caress as she kept her hands visible to him, "please, Buck, I need to help him." His eyes briefly wavered to the man dressed in red, white and blue that lay between them. "If you remember me…you'll remember that I was a nurse. I need to take care of him or he won't survive."

"Why?"

His voice sounded so foreign to his own ears and he shrugged it off in favor of watching as the woman seemed to recoil, a small waver in her posture that showed pain of what kind he didn't know, but she seemed to gather her strength once more as she spoke, "Because he's your _friend_." It was a simple statement that she seemed to believe was a fact. "You wouldn't have saved him otherwise."

"He was my mission."

"Perhaps," She swallowed, the man following the motion of the column of her throat as it bobbed before noticing the charm resting against the well of her neck between her collarbones; her turtleneck ripped open slightly and exposing parts of her bruised breastbone. "Perhaps he was…but what is he now? Who is he now?"

Bucky found that he didn't have an answer to her soft questions. Her tone was not pitying nor was it fearful and it puzzled him. Most people were afraid of him and even the man between had shown a level of fear before he had dropped his shield and declared he would not fight him. When she took a small step forward his gaze snapped forward once more, his gaze focusing intently on the woman and his eyes narrowing. It appeared as if a mere look was enough to tell her what he needed as she stopped in her place, her body held awkwardly as her gaze searched him almost pleadingly.

"I know what they did to you…in that bank…" Her voice was strong though her face seemed to crumble, "I know you recognized us...recognized me if only a little bit...and for that you were punished. You were punished because of _me_ and I'm so incredibly sorry for what they did to you. But they're gone now. It's just us here. Just you and me."

"Who are you?"

Her eyes softened around the edges, "I'm Alice…you used to call me Alley Cat."

He thought about her name, the ghost fluttering before his eyes seemed to shift as memories assaulted him and he flinched away from them, raising his eyes a second later when she went to move forward once again only to stop short, nearly tripping over her own feet. He glanced at her firearm and she nodded in understanding a resignation tightening her features once more.

 _Nurse_.

She had said she was a nurse. Nurses didn't carry firearms.

He wasn't certain where the information had come from exactly, but somewhere in the back of his mind he knew that the information that had presented itself was accurate. He studied her as she moved slowly, reaching into her holster and removing her gun. She glanced at it before tossing it to the side and raising her hands once more to show that she was no longer armed despite the few weapons he could still see on her person. He knew, should she pose a threat, that he was faster than she was and with the immediate threat of what he didn't doubt was her fastest weapon removed he felt the tension in his stance lessen, though he remained tall and rigid as he had been trained to be. She didn't seem to mind as she took another slow step forward and closer to the man between them.

"Stop."

She did suddenly, her posture tensed from her previous movement but still nonthreatening and relaxed.

"You know me."

She nodded slowly, "Yes."

"How?"

Pain seemed to flicker briefly in her eyes before she answered, "We were close…."

"I don't understand."

Her pained expression did not falter, if anything her entire face seemed to crumple and pinch with emotions he wasn't sure he knew the name of as her fingers seemed to unconsciously twitch towards her necklace, "We were in a relationship…lovers...partners." When he snorted she sighed, "We met during World War II…you knew him long before that, though." She took a deep breath, her chest shuddering with the movement, "We made a promise to one another. In London there was a bridge we used to walk and we promised to love one another as the sky may fall." A broken smile twitched at her split lips and creating what looked more like a grimace, the expression ghosting her features. "You had said that there was no chance of the sky ever falling...so that we would love each other until it did...It was so silly at the time, but we agreed that it would be our promise."

His eyes flickered back to the man lying between them and he had to blink suddenly when brief flashes of memory appeared before his vision of people he didn't know. He saw a faceless man in a green military uniform, hat left aside on a stone wall and facing a woman with her hands held delicately in his grasp - their hands locking between them. The woman wore a peach dress, chiffon curtaining the portrait neckline of the outfit and leaving sandy skin exposed along her trim arms and framing her slight form. Her face was cloudy before his eyes, but sharp hazel, nearly a light ochre that allowed sunlight to pass through them as if whiskey in a tumbler, smiled back at him. The words were soft " _as the sky may fall_ " they said before she had tucked into the man's side, his arm sliding across her shoulders and holding her close, the two smiling at one another before sharing a brief kiss. Their silhouettes were bathed suddenly in the setting sun in the memory and he blinked, the image disappearing nearly as quickly as it had come before his eyes snapped forward at her movement once more, his eyes taking in the concern in her own. The color startled him, but years of training stopped the motion in its tracks. A bright ochre hazel stared back at him and he felt his throat constrict in response.

It was an involuntary response and one that he didn't understand. His eyes suddenly met hers and he felt a frown twitching at his lips as he studied her. This woman was beaten, bruised and bloodied yet she held a strength to her stance and a willfulness in her presence alone that tickled the back of his mind in such startling familiarity that he found his scowl deepening.

"I hurt you."

Alice blinked in surprise before a frown tugged at her split lips, "Yes...but you were under orders that you couldn't disobey. You didn't choose to hurt me and I don't hold any blame towards you for that. I blame those that had controlled you." When his already deep scowl seemed to twitch deeper she sighed softly, "Given the _choice_ to hurt me...would you have taken it?" She watched as he seemed to consider her question and after a moment he shook his head, the movement near imperceptible and if she hadn't been paying such close attention to him she perhaps would have missed it. "Then I don't blame you for something you didn't have control over, Bucky. What they've made you do... _was not your choice_...if you need to remember anything, please remember that."

"But I killed you."

"No," Alice scowled deeply, her eyes flashing in her anger, "you didn't kill me. _Pierce_ was the one who killed me. He ordered you to beat me...to bring me to the brink of death, not to kill me. He wanted that pleasure for himself. He's a coward and if he isn't dead already, he will be. I'll make certain of that."

He watched the emotions play openly on her face and found that it confused him. Nurses didn't kill - his mind supplied helpfully - they took oaths to heal those despite race or creed. Nurses were meant to save lives, not take them. Yet, as he watched her he knew that this woman was not merely a nurse. He saw flashes from the recent past, the way they treated her like a caged animal and the way they spoke to her as if she were less because she was different. He didn't know _how_ she was different, but he could see flashes of a fight between her and one of his handlers in the small area in which they kept her and he felt a frown pull at the corners of his mouth once more. So deep in thought, he missed as her eyes studied him before snapping up once more as she moved a step closer, her eyes were earnest and openly expressing her concern.

"Are you hurt?"

He didn't answer her immediately and he watched as she seemed to regain her confidence as she met his eyes once again before reiterating her question.

"Bucky, are you hurt?"

"It's not my name."

His harsh words seemed to smack her in her already bruised face as she winced, her hand grasping at the necklace once more - a nervous reaction, he noted and filed away for later. "It _is_ your name…at least it was what you preferred people call you."

"It's _not_ my name."

Her brows pinched, "Then what would you like me to call you?"

The question was innocent, but Bucky's mind seemed to come to a standstill and he frowned. He didn't know what he wanted to be called or what his name truly was, yet these people continuously called him _Bucky_. He watched as she waited, her posture tensing as her eyes flickered back to the blonde laying between them and he snorted slightly, turning from her.

"Wait!" He glanced over his shoulder at the woman as if waiting for her to continue, "You never answered me."

"I'm fine."

She glared at him so suddenly he almost considered her a threat, "You're lying…your arm is hanging too low and you're _not_ left handed despite your prosthetic."

He was surprised she knew that about him. His own handlers didn't know he typically favored his right hand and not because of the cold metal of his left. It was ingrained in him to use his right hand - his flesh hand - finding that it was comfortable to handle most of his weapons on that side. He watched as she boldly stepped forward once again and he realized suddenly that her fluttering steps weren't because she had been fearful or nervous, no. This woman had not shown an ounce of fear of him during their short exchange. Her steps were uneasy because he remembered shattering her hip, her limp was present because while he didn't understand how she was _alive_ she was still standing. He felt anxious suddenly, his stomach flipping and his heart beating against his chest in ways he couldn't comprehend. Was this fear or was this something else entirely?

Alice watched the emotions battling against his stoic mask, his eyes flashing in ways that served to remind her that despite this man being troubled, he was still the same man she had loved all those years ago. He was the same man she _still_ loved even now. She continued to step towards him, mindful of his body language: his stature tense and coiled like a spring and his eyes suddenly unfocused. As if he hadn't been breathing he suddenly took a breath and his eyes instantly refocusing to see she was much closer than she had been and he nearly scattered backwards, the steps controlled despite the quickness of the movement. Alice raised her hands once more, coaching herself to stay as relaxed as she could. "I won't hurt you…nor will I stop you if you plan to leave. At least let me put your arm back into socket…"

"You won't stop me?"

She shook her head, eyes begging him to believe her, "I swear on my life I will not stop you if you choose to leave."

He considered her for a moment, vaguely noticing that she had maintained eye contact with him as she had spoken. If she had been his new handler she wouldn't have maintained his stare as none of them had before and she didn't look at him as a weapon. Every person he had interacted with beforehand would not have allowed him to speak let alone do so freely. There was nothing malicious about the promise, no darkness in her eyes that signified that she would renege on her word as a cruel way to play with him. She truly believed that she would let him go, the warmth of her gaze telling him more than he assumed she realized. After a moment of consideration he gave her a sharp nod and she continued her slow steps forward until she reached his side.

"Relax your shoulders and breathe…in and out…count your breaths six in, twelve out…" Her voice was soft as she gently took his arm in her hands. He tried not to focus on her careful touch as he followed her instructions. He felt himself beginning to relax and he watched as she nodded, satisfied that the muscles released their tension. "Now, I'm going to move your arm up and it's going to be uncomfortable, bending your elbow like so," She demonstrated his arm bending at a forty-five degree angle, her hand encircling his much larger one when he made a fist. He tried to ignore how soft her hand was as she eased his hand out of the fist, her head shaking side to side, "leave your hand open and relaxed. If you leave your hand fisted like that it will tense the muscles and make it hurt much more." She took a deep breath, "Now, keep breathing…I'm going to do this nice and slow so that you don't hurt yourself more than I assume you had to in order to drag Steve and yourself from the river."

He didn't comment as she continued speaking gently, her voice finding a cadence that he found he liked as she explained each and every movement – something he didn't realize he appreciated as he got the odd sense of déjà vu not missing his notice and he nearly scoffed openly at the thought. No one after any of his missions explained how they were fixing him. They merely did and did so quickly and efficiently despite how little or how much pain he felt at their handling and as he followed her breathing instructions he watched as she held his arm aloft, bringing it from its raised position – which he admitted to himself _was_ uncomfortable and borderline painful – and slowly bringing it into his center at a steady pace and almost in an arching motion. As his elbow became parallel with his side he felt his shoulder slide back into place and the relief was immediate as the throbbing of the appendage ceased to merely a dull ache. He looked down at her as he watched her rested his hand against his chest, his hand meeting the metal of his opposite shoulder.

"You're going to want to ice that…when you get the chance." She breathed as she looked up at him, nearly tumbling over her words when she looked up to see him gazing so intensely at her. She swallowed a few times before allowing her hand to fall and dislodging a pack from her belt. Glancing back at him, she noticed his tense stance and immediately showed him the pouch she held in her hand, "In here are some medical supplies, one of which includes pain killers. Follow the instructions on the bottle since I've made these myself…they're ones I've given to you before…a long time ago."

The intensity of his gaze did not lessen and Alice felt herself becoming embarrassed before he spoke once more, "That's it?"

"There are no strings attached to this," She informed him with a sigh. "Do I want you to go? No…but this isn't about what I want. What do _you_ want?"

He was silent for a long time, watching as the emotions flashed across her features almost too quickly for him to catch. It was strange that he found himself wanting to please this woman, but she had asked him what he wanted. Did he truly know what he wanted? He knew he wanted to run. There was a piece of him that was struggling to the surface of the blankness that had become his mind – like an itch that couldn't be scratched no matter how one were to position themselves. He didn't understand what he felt and he wanted to rage at her suddenly – to shake her and tell her that _he didn't get to have a choice_. He was a weapon!

But was he truly?

This woman had informed him that he had once preferred to be called Bucky. This woman informed him that she would not stop him if he left. This woman, despite what he had done to her, helped him and fixed his arm - _forgave him_. This woman wanted him to choose. This woman wanted him _to want_.

He didn't understand what any of that meant, but he knew viscerally that she was giving him a chance to relieve that itch at the back of his mind where flashes and images were beginning to slowly overwhelm him. She stood patiently at his side as he battled in his mind…a mind that he wasn't sure he could fully trust. With that brief thought in mind he found himself glancing at her and falling back into the habit of receiving a mission.

"Mission objective?"

She frowned at him as if his words displeased her, "I'm sorry?"

"Mission objective…" He drawled slowly, "My mission objective…what is it?"

"You're not a tool, Bucky and this isn't a mission. You asked me if I'd let you go. I said yes. I'm not going to go back on my word if you want to leave."

"I don't understand…"

Her eyes flickered, the hazel deepening into an almost flat brown that seemed to match the mud sprawled across the front of her shirt, "Do you remember anything?"

" _I'm with you till the end of the line_."

"It was what you and Steve," he followed the line of her arm to the man still sprawled on the bank, "used to say to each other. It was a pact - a promise - between you that was meant to remind you that it doesn't matter what happens…you'll always have each other."

He frowned, "And you…?"

"I want you to be happy…if that means that you have to leave in order to reclaim yourself, then I will wait as long as that takes…no matter how long I don't want to."

"Why?"

Alice flinched at the coldness in his voice, but sighed softly and meeting his sharp gaze with as much earnest as she could manage despite the raging emotions bubbling to the surface that told her to cling to him and force him to stay, "Because…that's what love is...and we made a promise: _as the sky may fall_."

The soldier was silent for a long time as he took in her features, attempting to study her apart from the ghost that continued to flicker in her place. Her hair was dark at the root but a much lighter almost grey-brown towards the ends – the strands dripping water into her face and against her narrow shoulders, the ends curling and waving despite the water that still soaked the strands. She had a gentle slope to her jaw, her lips – despite being split and cracked – were full and a pale pink, and sloping cheekbones that were neither extremely sharp or too rounded; her eyes were shaped like chestnuts and framed by dark lashes that fanned her freckled cheeks each time she blinked. She stood shorter than him, the top of her head barely reaching his shoulder and her body – perhaps at one time had been strong – was held awkwardly and her gloved hands exposing bloodied fingertips. She was objectively beautiful, he could admit that to himself, but she was broken and wounded and he couldn't help but remember that it was him who had done that to her. He decided then that he didn't deserve her kindness…that perhaps she was better off without him.

Love: that was what she had said. She was letting him go because that's what love was.

He didn't know if he could believe that. He couldn't remember what love felt like or if he had ever experienced it, but she was offering him a chance to figure it out for himself. Shaking these thoughts from his mind almost physically, his eyes flickered between her and the blonde man he had pulled from the river. "Worry about him."

Alice watched as he stalked away and her words died in her throat nearly as soon as the protests came to the tip of her tongue. As much as she wanted to chase after him and force him to stop, Steve's condition was concerning and she knew his health was deteriorating quickly given how pale he had become. And she had promised him. She had promised to let him go if that was what he wanted.

She watched until Bucky's lumbering frame hit the tree line before she turned, keeling next to her friend she reached into another pouch at her belt and produced a knife. Frowning down at the uniform he wore, she recognized it as the replica from the Smithsonian exhibit that they had made to look exactly like his uniform from the 1940s and she knew she would have to ruin it. Pushing the thought away she began cutting her way through the thick fabric and pulling it away with as much strength as she could until she exposed the bullet wound on his stomach and frowning. It had just missed the organ, but only slightly. Bucky, it seemed, still had his deadly accuracy from when he was the prized sharpshooter of the Howling Commandos. He would need immediate attention and she pressed her fingers to her earpiece and hailed Natasha - nearly forgetting it was there during the conversation with Bucky - no longer the Winter Soldier.

" _Alice is everything okay?_ "

"I found him. I need you to call paramedics and get them on scene, he's going to need actual medical care and it's more than I can do alone."

" _What's your location?_ "

She reached into Steve's uniform and removing his beloved compass before taking note of where they were and tucking it into her pocket for safe keeping, "We're North by Northwest about four miles from where the last helicarrier went down. West side of the Potomac on the banks."

" _Anything close by that you can tell us? Mile marker, landmark?_ "

She glanced and noticed the highway not too far away. "I'm south of the interstate…probably about ten miles."

" _Sam's sending them your way._ "

"Thanks Nat," She sighed before placing her fingers against his pulse and pulling up her sleeve to glance at the watch that rested against her wrist, counting his BPM and frowning. He wasn't in shock, which was good albeit surprising though she accounted that to his unconscious state, but his pulse was slower than normal and she dropped his wrist gently before tugging her jacket off so she had better movement. She then began checking him for injuries, frowning when she came to a bullet wound at the back of his leg and not seeing an exit wound which told her the bullet was still in his leg. She reached into her pouch and pulled out a relatively clean rag and pressing it against his wounded sternum.

"C'mon Steve don't make this difficult for me…"

Pulling her turtleneck over her form she began ripping it leaving her in her sports bra and raising gooseflesh along her exposed skin. She quickly cinched the small makeshift bandage to his body, a circus act in and of itself as she had to lift his body slightly just to get it around him. She vaguely heard sirens in the distance and knew the ambulance would be there soon. She then scooted around his body, hands working with practiced ease as she came to his wounded leg and pinching the edge of the fabric of his pants she made a slit in the material and began examining the wound. Her ears soon heard shouting and she crouched, gently cradling Steve's leg as she did. "We're over here!"

Two paramedics suddenly came through the underbrush and took in the scene before glancing at her, "What do you have?"

"He's not in shock as far as I can tell but he's easily lost at least a pint of blood…definitely in need of a transfusion: type B positive," She explained with practiced ease, "BPM is 30 over 120 and has steadily dropped and he's easily got multiple contusions, cuts – most of which seem superficial with the exception of the one near his mouth and cheek which will need stitches, a stab wound on the upper left shoulder and two bullet wounds. The one on his stomach missed the organ and presents entrance and exit wounds, but the one on his leg only presents entrance so the bullet is still definitely in there. I also suspect he may have damage to his ribs, but after managing to get my hand under him he doesn't seem to present any spinal injuries and his neck seems fine as well so moving him shouldn't be hard once he's on stretcher."

The paramedic nodded before calling back for a stretcher, "That's a relief if I ever heard one," She laughed, "too many times we find ones like this that are beyond hope. And yourself, miss?"

Alice quirked a brow, a smirk twitching her lips, "I'm not submitting to treatment."

"But you look worse than he does!"

The mutant sighed softly, "I assure you I'm fine. We've got more serious matters on our hands than a few of my superficial bruises and cuts." She rolled her eyes when the paramedic went to argue, "Bullet wound to contusion which is more important? They teach you that in the certification class."

"We were told you had medical."

"Was a nurse longer than I was a paramedic with Boston EMS."

The paramedic sighed softly, "Please, call me Kara."

"Alice," She introduced quickly, "I'll help you move him…he's a heavy man."

"Captain America, heavy?" The woman laughed, "Not a surprise."

"I suppose," She nodded as Kara's partner returned and the three of them loaded Steve into the stretcher. Alice glanced around the area once more before snatching up her jacket and following after them.

In her haste she had missed the gun-metal blue eyes that had watched from beyond the tree line before disappearing into the early evening with a final nod.

**-0-**

Sam and Natasha met her at the hospital lobby as they took Steve into surgery and Alice couldn't help the relief she felt at seeing the two of them relatively unharmed. Sam had a few cuts and bruises from his fight with Rumlow and Natasha looked as fresh as a daisy. Both had moved forward to meet her and she blinked in surprise when she found Natasha's arms around her first, her body tensing unconsciously and she tampered the feeling of panic down at the sudden movement before patting the woman on the back awkwardly. Natasha pulled away with a small frown but an understanding look filtering in her eyes and gently shaking her head at Sam when he had stepped forward. Alice, while alive, had gone through trauma and her body language expressed that clearly and so she offered the mutant a relieved albeit apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry, Alice, we looked everywhere –"

The mutant offered her a weak smile as she fidgeted, "It's…I'll make it."

"Just know we're here…we're not going anywhere."

Sam smiled then, "Right, because where would Solo be without his Chewie?"

Alice allowed a soft smile to pull at her split and cracked lips before chuckling quietly, "Too true…"

The three shifted as an awkward silence spread between them as if they were at a strange crossroad and it was only broken when Maria and Jodi stepped into the area both looking no worse for wear. Glancing between them, Maria's eyes settled on the mutant, "Any news on Cap?"

"He was being brought in for surgery as soon as we got here," Alice answered with a soft sigh, "I'm sure he'll be fine."

The group fell into silence once more before Natasha sighed softly, "Do you want to get cleaned up?"

Alice shifted once more as if highly uncomfortable and the redhead knew precisely why. Not only was Alice wearing a considerable lack of clothes, dirty and water-logged but her skin was bruised practically beyond recognition and people had not been discrete in hiding their stares. A group of doctors and nurses had been glancing in nothing short than open staring at the mutant as if wanting to drag her into a room for treatment and it was clear that the petite brunette knew it as she continuously shifted her weight as if weighing the options between fight or flight. After a brief moment of clear anxiety the mutant nodded and the spy regarded the small gathered group.

"Keep us updated on Rogers…"

"Here," Sam called suddenly and tossing a set of keys to Natasha, "my house isn't far."

"Thanks, Sam."

He nodded at the soft voice of the mutant before watching as she suddenly tucked into the spy's side and allowed her to put an arm around her as if shielding herself from the prying looks. Her body had been hunched over as if caving in on her petite frame but whether it was to hide or a natural instinct to protect herself and make herself smaller, the former Pararescuer couldn't decide.

She had all but flinched when he had begun walking over and had looked so uncomfortable with touch that it had surprised him. Since the first moment he had met her she had seemed to seek touch and to see her suddenly shy away from it was disheartening at best. Just looking at her he knew she had suffered physically, but he didn't need to have a Ph.D. to tell him that the real battle for Alice was going to be the mental trauma. He ran a hand over his cropped, textured hair at the thought and with a quick glance at the former S.H.I.E.L.D agents he knew they were thinking much the same. In that moment he told himself that he was going to have to be the one to tell Steve.

Steve and Alice were close and she clearly tended to seek comfort from the larger man in a way that Sam had initially thought had been romantic. He had been so surprised when she had lobbed that coffee coaster at him just for worrying her that he thought he would have to bear witness to a lover's spat and it would have explained the patriot's reluctance to involve her. But Steve had been fast to correct that suggestion and so had Alice when Natasha had cornered her about it in her basement. The two clearly had a bond that was bordering more on siblings and he realized, with a chuckle, that the roles were so strange it seemed comical. Though Alice was so tiny in comparison to Steve, the large patriot constantly attempted to make himself smaller in her presence despite the fact that he never really needed to – Alice stood plenty tall herself; he also acted as an over-bearing and over protective little brother and had been so against Alice getting involved and he understood why. Alice, while taking to the role of older sibling – and not just for her age alone – was fragile in certain ways that Sam recognized in himself from when he had returned from his two tours.

The mutant had blatantly obvious insecurities and almost seemed to look to Steve and Natasha almost as if in approval despite her own blazingly apparent talents that differed so much from her friends. She sought validation and praise without wanting to make it obvious…to feel needed and he understood that feeling more than anything. Despite being a mutant and considered enhanced she was simply like any other civilian and he was the same: a person with no superpowers that was now drawn back into a world barely holding itself together. The two of them had bonded over that small fact while driving the 40 minutes to Fort Meade and even while they were walking through the facility to get to his gear.

He knew that it was going to take a lot of time to get her back without watching her fidget or wince every time someone neared her and he knew he would have to remember whatever boundaries she decided to set and be the one to remind Steve of that as well.

Alice remained silent, her fingers dancing along her charm in anxious movements that she barely recognized. Natasha had put on a random music station when they had stepped into the car and the two had not spoken since and Alice felt awful for it. She hadn't anticipated reacting so violently to touch especially from someone she knew she could trust, but it appeared as if it was going to take a while before she managed to beat her demons back into submission and she snorted at the thought. She knew Natasha's eyes, while watching the road with a scary intensity, were flickering to her in concern and she was torn between wishing the spy would spit out her question and being grateful for the woman's patience and understanding that this was something she wasn't ready to speak about.

The two drove for a short while before Natasha pulled outside of a small house set in a cute suburban area outside the taller buildings of the city and Alice assumed it hadn't taken them more than 10 minutes to arrive. Natasha stepped out of the car after the mutant, stepping in front of her only to unlock the door before leading her to the same bathroom Sam had let her and Steve clean themselves up in. She watched as Alice seemed to fidget in the small space and began pulling things out of drawers including towels and setting them against the counter.

"I'm not leaving, but I'm going to get you some clothes to wear…" She began as she watched Alice's eyes dart around the bathroom as if looking for exits and she sighed, "I'll leave the door open this way you have a way out…take as much time as you need." The mutant's eyes found hers and she offered the spy a weak smile before nodding and beginning to strip down. Alice had never been shy about her body but as she peeled the clothes away from her she caged herself as if hiding the true extent of her injuries from the sharp eyes of her friend before disappearing behind the fogged glass of the shower door almost as quickly as she could.

Natasha frowned as she turned from the bathroom and as promised left the door open after her before focusing her mind on finding clean clothes for the mutant. Searching through her own bags, the Russian found a pair of sweatpants, a camisole and frowning when she couldn't find anything else to suit the thin mutant. She frowned before stepping into Sam's room and finding his Airforce crewneck and with a nod – despite knowing it would be far too large on the brunette's petite build – it would have to do until she could get her other clothes. Natasha returned to the room where she could still hear the shower running and frowned as she caught the soft sound of muffled sobbing from the small bathroom.

No sooner had Natasha left the room, Alice was stepping into the shower as shame gripped every piece of her soul and expanding out to her muscles and limbs. She felt as if she was overreacting and perhaps she was. With adrenaline finally coming down from the extreme high it had been in for the last day at least she could feel every ache and pain that scattered across her broken frame and exhaustion tugged at every piece of her. She knew she could do with sleep as that would take care of much of her problems; however, she knew that this time not everything was physical. For as tired as her body was, her mind was still racing.

When she had woken up in that bank with the whir of an unknown machine just beyond fear had slithered into her mind like an unwelcome serpent and she hadn't had time to control that fear. The fear of being useless, the fear of being weak and defenseless; it was insecurities Alice had tried for nearly a full two centuries to bury and overcome and it appeared she had been wholly unsuccessful and she hadn't expected that failure to be so painful. Memories she hadn't expected had come barreling through the normally carefully reinforced door she kept locked away in her mind – blasted open and the pain that came with them had assaulted her. It had taken her nearly over 24 hours to fully grasp her situation and her trauma and now she felt broken – shattered and unable to find all of the tiny pieces as they lay scattered at her feet. She replayed the last conversation she had with Bucky both in the 1940s as well as the one on the bank of the Potomac and wondering – selfishly, perhaps – if she had made the right decision.

As the water beat against her weakened form a sob escaped her and her hand immediately moved to cover her mouth, her cracked and split lips trembling as she tried to hold her emotions at bay. She didn't want Natasha to hear her despite knowing that it was inevitable and only a matter of time before the Russian returned to check on her. The more she resisted the feeling the more it fought against her like a animal fighting for a scrap of meat and she couldn't hold herself for long before the walls seemed to close in around her and her sobs wracked her body as a lightning strike cracks and stretches violently across the sky in a thunderstorm.

A panic attack or anxiety attack?

She couldn't tell the difference between them at that moment, but she could feel it beating against her breast as she fought to bring air into her lungs, the pain making it difficult to tell if the organs were functioning properly. Her nerves seemed to stand on end and she found herself backing into a corner of the shower as she screwed her eyes shut. Her emotions created a battering ram against her chest and making her heart race so painfully against her breastbone she vaguely wondered if this is what it felt like to have a heart attack. Suddenly and without warning she felt arms around her and she screamed, fighting the arms that seemed to hold her as a voice she nearly didn't recognize called her name again and again.

"ALICE!"

She blinked, still vehemently pushing against the body she found pressed into her own and her sobs strangling her throat – her tears mixing with water from the shower and the suds of the shampoo she had barely managed to work through her hair before everything seemed to go awry. It took her a few moments for her focus to return before she noticed a half clothed body hugging hers tightly, a shock of red hair appearing before her vision and Alice shuddered, a small whimper escaping unbidden from between her lips before a sob that stumbled its way from her gut broke passed her lips and creating a whine in her throat – the sound guttural and feral all at once.

It was only Natasha.

She had to repeat the words like a well-spoken mantra as if reminding herself that the person clinging to her was a friend – someone she could trust. She didn't hear the whispered words against her ear in comfort nor did she fully register when her arms clung to the other narrowed frame, her face finding a home where Natasha's shoulder met her neck, her sobs making her small body quake like a leaf in a storm and she felt the arms tighten around her.

Comfort.

She had to remember. Hands did not only hurt but hands could comfort and she had to believe that this was comfort as her memories flashed before her hazel eyes hidden from view by her clenched lids and the Russian's shoulder. If Natasha minded getting soaked by the water in the shower she didn't show it, cradling the naked and broken woman to her as tightly as she could manage and acting as an anchor to Alice's reality and the mutant found herself sobbing harder.

"You need to breathe, Allie, just breathe."

The words echoed in her mind before feeling the woman's chest expanding against her own and she unconsciously found herself mimicking the movement despite her hiccupped and choppy breaths. With every breath the Russian would stroke her wet hair, her dexterous hands working through the thick locks to aide in getting the soap suds out completely.

"It's okay…you're safe, it's okay."

The words were whispered like a promise and the squeezing of the woman's strong arms with every word acted to cement those words into her. Alice's body seemed to sag suddenly and if it weren't for her friend's arms she surely would have slid against the tiles. The mantra was still whispered and the mutant allowed her eyes to close as Natasha supported her, running long fingers through her hair and massaging her scalp and she submitted herself to the gentle ministrations.

Natasha ignored her damp clothes as she helped the mutant finish bathing, the only sound passing between them was the smaller woman's shuddering breaths and soon she reached over to turn off the water. Natasha was less than concerned with her clothes, now dripping lukewarm water and clinging to her as if a second skin as she reached for a towel and helping Alice wrap it around her and doing the same with her hair.

The Russian had not expected the mutant to break down so quickly, though she had anticipated it. Alice shuffled forward almost as if on auto-pilot before allowing the spy to lead her into the room beyond where she encouraged the mutant to dress and watching as Alice forwent the undergarments and pulled the sweatpants up to her hips and then allowing Sam's sweatshirt to fall around her shoulders as Natasha opened the windows. She knew the panic attack was due to feeling claustrophobic, or at least had helped trigger it among other things, the words that she had managed to catch between the mutant's staggering and stuttering suggesting as such. She watched as the brunette sat on the edge of her bed as if still not fully aware of herself and Natasha stripped of her own camisole, taking the one she had grabbed for the mutant and pulling it over her head. Climbing behind her, Natasha took a brush from her bag, and removed the towel that the mutant had draped over her head as if having issues doing simple tasks and she glanced at the woman's shoulders to see the deep bruises and concluded it was because Alice herself couldn't lift her arms very much and it had probably been what had helped in triggering her attack.

Alice nearly flinched when she felt the brush tug at her scalp and seeing this, the Russian took care to work through her hair as gently as she could. Natasha was able to see the damage her scalp had taken as she gently pulled the brush through the woman's damp hair and she couldn't help the frown twitching at her lips and noting the brunette's tense and bruised shoulders. She realized suddenly that Alice was perhaps the most helpless she had ever been and her own presence was perhaps not helping the mutant's situation as she was quite literally, perhaps, at the lowest point she had ever been. Natasha speculated that the mutant had not been this broken since her time as an experiment and she knew enough that she would have to proceed with the situation delicately.

"This reminds me of a time before I was a spy."

The words were spoken so softly that the mutant almost didn't catch them. Her eyebrows pulled into a furrow as her lips twitched, her teeth chewing on her bottom lip.

Natasha seemed to know that Alice couldn't speak and continued easily, "When I was a little girl growing up in the Red Room…there was another girl there that I had become close to. Almost like sisters." She smiled sadly, continuing the gentle motions of the brush in her hand with practiced movements and she watched as Alice's shoulders seemed to relax. "She had the lightest hair I had ever seen, but it was so pretty. We fell into a routine of helping each other untangle our hair after each lesson."

"W-what was her name?"

"Irina," Natasha forced the smile, thankful that her story seemed to be helping the mutant to calm down from the adrenaline high and panic attack, "She was there almost as long as me. I remember thinking she was weak when I first met her. The Red Room wasn't a place for friendship and any affair of the heart was quickly squashed or you were killed...you competed against one another to survive."

"That's horrible," At Alice's whispered comment the redhead merely shrugged, dragging the brush through the mutant's waving hair. While the Russian's hair curled in tight coils, the brunette had waves that seemed to curl loosely and she couldn't help but admire the volume the tresses would get – assuming it had come from styling on Alice's part. Normally she would have used a t-shirt to blot the strands dry to reduce frizz, instead she gathered the towel around the tresses and attempted to blot the strands dry. She was more concerned at that moment in making sure Alice was as comfortable as she could be and at least taken care of enough that the mutant would hopefully not fixate on how she looked. The former-spy sighed slightly before shaking her thoughts and attempting to find a place to continue her story.

"It is… _was_ …but not everything was always awful. Irina and I were close and we took time to take care of each other. Training, ballet…it didn't matter. She was my constant and when I pulled ahead with our training, she was never bitter. She wouldn't have made a good spy, though." Natasha smiled sadly. "She was too soft…too kind."

Alice blinked. She knew she should say something, but didn't know what. Natasha didn't seem to mind, however.

"She was my better half and when I got out I told myself that I would live for her because it's what she would have wanted. Irina always looked to the future and saw things I didn't think were possible."

"Nat…"

"It's okay, Al," The woman soothed as she met the mutant's watery gaze with one of her own. "I'm alright. It was a long time ago now."

"Is that why you disappeared…after New York?"

Her small voice concerned the redhead, but she nodded, "Yes. I had promised her that I would light a candle for her whenever I found time and I still make it a point to do so." She offered the woman a smile, "Would you prefer your hair up or down?" Her shrug was less than helpful, but Natasha decided a simple braid would do and gently tilted her head back so she could reach the front few strands of her hair before weaving the dark brown and mushroom tresses into a loose Dutch braid. Alice allowed her eyes to close as Natasha's fingers moved along her sore scalp, the woman being careful around the sides of her head and allowing her nails to scrape gently and forcing her to relax further.

Alice wasn't sure how to voice her gratefulness to the woman who was taking such care with her, but she only hoped that Natasha knew and as the redhead's hands rested against her bruised shoulders she knew that she did. Natasha wasn't only her teacher, but her friend and she felt shame for needing to remind herself more than once over the last hour or so. She didn't think it would be possible to convey how much she appreciated that the former-spy was not pushing her to speak, but took her silence as answer enough. She always tried to remain strong no matter how much she didn't feel the confidence to and she almost envied Natasha's easy confidence. The Russian never pretended to be something she wasn't – aliases and disguises aside – she knew she wouldn't be liked by everyone and she had a suspicion that underneath that strong bravado there was a woman much like herself; a woman who was scared to be vulnerable and scared to get close to anyone even if their reasons were different. When Alice had first met the redhead she hadn't been sure she could even manage to stay in the same room as her for any length of time, but after New York the mutant couldn't help but seek her out. She concluded that Clint had much to do with that as well. Natasha clearing her throat brought the woman from her thoughts and she glanced at her over her shoulder in question.

"Where were you?"

"I was just thinking about how I didn't think we would be friends," Alice answered after a long moment, her chest heaving with the effort it took her to speak. "About how we've probably got more in common than I thought…"

"We certainly do," Natasha agreed with her first genuine smile, "but I know how I am and I imagine you are the same…vulnerability is a weakness."

Alice nodded, not disagreeing with the assessment, "It is…but I suppose it's a strength too."

The redhead seemed to cling to the conversation, merely happy that the mutant was speaking once more, "You sound like Steve."

"Maybe, but what I mean is that when you trust someone with that vulnerability they become your strength." Alice sighed, "I can't tell you how many times in the last hour I've had to remind myself that you're not a trick of my memory."

"I know."

The words were simple and with it Alice felt every muscle in her body tense and relax unknowingly determining fight or flight. She hadn't tried to make her discomfort obvious, but she shouldn't have been so surprised. Natasha knew how to read people and had made a living out of it. She could read micro expressions almost as easily as she could breathe and it was what had made her such a good spy. The woman watched the crestfallen look on the mutant's face as well as taking in the tensing muscles and the nervous movement of her fingers against the duvet, her knee bouncing in anxiety.

"I'd be more surprised if you had pretended you were fine, Al, and I'm not hurt by it just worried." She watched as her body visibly relaxed in relief and climbed off of the bed so she could sit in front of the mutant before grasping her bruised and scabbed over hands and stopping their nervous fluttering. " _We_ are going to make it through this, _together_."

Hazel eyes swam with barely contained tears and focused on sea-green as if studying her for any dishonesty or manipulation and when she found none the tears that she had thought had run out slid trails down her cheeks. Natasha bit her lips and nodded and offering her a reassuring smile as she squeezed their joint hands and allowing Alice to lean into her as she took shuddering breaths. The redhead released her hands and slowly pulled her into a hug and the mutant clung to her. It was in that moment that Natasha knew that she was going to be spending as much time with the mutant as possible in an effort to help her heal and this was a situation only time could afford them.

After a long while Alice's voice trembled through the silence, "Is he dead?"

"Who?"

"Pierce." Her voice did not waver, but the trembling of her body told Natasha more about where her friend was in that moment than her voice did. "Is Pierce dead?"

"Yes…Fury killed him."

Natasha didn't expect the sob of relief that ripped through the silence after the declaration and she held the mutant tighter to her. At the least, it was one demon beaten down for the time being.

**-0-**

" _How's she doing_?"

Natasha sighed into the phone from where she stood in the doorway of Sam's spare room, the mutant tucked into the duvet and breathing easily. During the embrace she had seemingly gone limp, her breathing evening out and the spy had almost panicked before realizing that she had fallen asleep and she had been quick to tuck the mutant in for some much needed rest.

"She could certainly be worse," She answered as she watched the rise and fall of her chest, "I can't tell if it's from what they did to her or the stress of Barnes, but all I know is that she's fighting instincts and behaviors that stretch beyond this single incident. Steve, I've never seen her like this..."

The line fell silent and if it hadn't been for the beeping and muffled sounds of general hospital noise she was sure he had hung up, " _I've only ever seen her like this once…and if it's as bad as you're saying then I didn't even scratch the surface_."

"When was this?"

" _After New York_ ," Steve sighed softly and she could tell by his voice alone that he was dealing with his own demons as well, " _She had told me about when she was an experiment…barely...but she implied what had happened."_

"I remember it being in her file," The former-spy admitted softly. "When Fury sent me to collect her he had said that she would lash out if cornered…would only kill if she saw absolutely no other choice but…"

" _But what, Nat_?"

"I was able to recover the video…the video of her in that bank." She swallowed, racking a hand through her hair, "Steve, it was horrible. Pierce was a monster for what he made her go through." The tense silence that had fallen over the line did not comfort her, but she knew she had to tell him. "He made Barnes beat her, Steve…and she didn't fight him…like she knew this song and dance and had been through it before. The most she did was block sensitive areas, but it was brutal and she didn't stop him even when she could have."

" _Why are you telling me this_?"

"Because you need to be prepared," Natasha frowned. "Al isn't herself…she admitted to needing to remind herself that I was a friend multiple times and before that she had nearly attacked me in the middle of her panic attack. She's in survival mode and if you try to comfort her like you normally do you may trigger another attack. You're equal in size to him, Steve, and I can't imagine what that will do to her."

Steve seemed to wilt over the phone, " _I didn't want her involved…_ "

"I know. But you and I both know that if she found out by herself…"

" _I know,_ " The patriot sighed, " _But maybe then we could have put the pieces back together._ "

"We can still put the pieces back together," Natasha said as she looked back into the room, a determined line to her features, "it might take a while, but we'll do it. And we'll do it as a team."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** I'm so proud of this chapter guys. It was so hard to write and I'm sorry for the triggering content, but for what these characters (not just my OC) go through I think it's important to make it as realistic as I can! We're finally here though~ we have ONE MORE chapter for TWS timeline and then we're working on some original content before moving into a small plot divergence and AOU. I'm still in the process of working out those details of how I want everything to work out since the MCU timeline gets a little weird here.
> 
> According to what I've found of the MCU, Age of Ultron happens in late 2015, early 2016 and Civil War happens later on in 2016. I could be wrong, but I'm gonna slightly change some things up here and make it where AOU happens relatively close in timeline to Antman and CW so pretty much the next three movies I plan to mention all happen around the same time if not immediately after one another. I'll disclose now that I'm not planning to do much with the Antman timeline, but I will be referencing it a bit since I'm trying to make Alice's involvement in AOU a little different than a normal "let's tag along and integrate into the timeline" like I've done with Avengers 2012 and TWS. I'm still playing around with the idea of going into the Antman timeline, however, so don't count it out just yet if you're a fan...it may still happen lol!
> 
> I'm always open to thoughts here so if you have any suggestions or ideas I'm more than happy to hear them :)
> 
> Thanks so much for all the love on the last chapter and I really hope you enjoy where this story is about to go! I'm excited to take this journey with you guys and I can't tell y'all how invested I am in Alice and Bucky here! We got a small reunion here, BUT there's a more in-depth and larger reunion planned later on that'll be beautiful and wonderful and sad all at the same time! So thank you all for sticking with me through this slow-burn ;)
> 
> Stay beautiful my dears and drink lots of water! We're just plants with complicated emotions~
> 
> xo Eirlys
> 
> P.S. The horse is probably already well beyond dead, but I'll repeat myself again when I say that if you're looking for a truly indulgent and wonderfully thought out story I HIGHLY suggest you check out simmerandcry's poly Steve/Bucky/OC story: Show Me, Don't Tell Me! It's an absolute work of art and I'm certain you'd all enjoy it :)
> 
> OKAY BYE~!


	16. Way Down We Go

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_16_

Alice grunted as she pulled another of Sam's sweatshirts over her body. Natasha had been kind enough to run out while she had been in her recovery hibernation (as sleep wasn't truly what she experienced after she pushed her body to a literal breaking point) to get her undergarments and leggings – something the mutant didn't prefer wearing but found them serviceable for the time being as her body still hurt and jeans would be cumbersome to put on and rough on her still sensitive and healing skin. She forewent wearing a bra simply because she couldn't raise her arms or twist them far enough to clasp the garment into place; a frustrating thing for her, but her breasts were small enough that it wasn't obvious especially in the oversized sweatshirts she had been wearing courtesy of the closet of one Sam Wilson.

Glancing in the mirror she looked over her face to see that much of the bruising had finally faded, though she was left with ugly yellowing spots in places where the damage had been more significant. She was thankful to see that the cuts that had lingered were gone and she looked more tired than she did beaten; now her body was adjusting to new bones and atrophied muscles that would take time to strengthen, but knew that could be dealt with at another time.

A knocking on the doorframe had her head snapping up and she relaxed upon seeing Natasha, already dressed in a black pantsuit and white camisole, the heels on her feet making her slim frame look longer. Her hair had been straightened once more and fell about her shoulders neatly and the necklace cinched around her neck glittered. The woman's eyes were soft when they found the mutant and she offered her a small smile.

"You managed to get the shirt on, that's good."

"Still can't manage a bra though," Alice huffed before glaring at her shoulders in the mirror, "I feel useless."

Natasha stepped into the room, her heels clicking beneath her, "You're not…the muscles still need time to heal. Want some help with your hair?"

"Please."

The former-spy smiled fully this time at the exasperated sound that came from the mutant and stepped behind her and fixing the highlighted strands into a Dutch braid and finishing it in the low messy bun that Alice tended to prefer before pulling her shorter strands of hair out to frame her face. Alice allowed the woman to help her, her mind in a much better place than it had been three days before and sighing softly as Natasha's nails scraped against her healed scalp. When the woman laughed, the mutant opened her eyes to see amused green staring back at her, the redhead's full lips pulled into an easy smile.

"What?"

"You're _just_ short of making purring noises," She chirped, "are you sure your actual mutation isn't being a cat?"

"Oh, ha-ha," She snorted though a smile flickered at the corners of her lips, "between you and Stark I don't know who has better cat jokes."

"I do, obviously."

"Just because you're my friend doesn't mean you get a pass when you're _not_ funny."

"Sure I do," She smirked, "how else would you get around right now?"

That much was true, the mutant found herself conceding and offering her a small smile as she took in Natasha's attire once again, "You have to go before the Security Council right?"

"Unfortunately," she sighed, "But I suppose that's the price you pay when you dump all of your secrets and the Government's secrets out for the world to see."

"Fury was okay with that?"

Natasha weighed the question, "He knew what my intentions were…and Steve made it clear that S.H.I.E.L.D had to end in order to give it a chance to potentially rebuild later on. I doubt Fury will simply let it go." Taking in the mutant's stiff shoulders and the way her face had fallen into practiced stoicism, "Pierce is dead. S.H.I.E.L.D compromised by HYDRA…It's a mess, but it had to be done so that we could move forward."

Her relief wasn't missed by the former spy, "It's really over isn't it?"

"Not all of it. I'm sure when Steve heals up he's going to want to start hunting down HYDRA bases."

Alice considered the statement for a moment before rolling her sore shoulders back and standing tall as she could manage as she faced the redhead, "I want to help."

"Alice…"

"No, Nat, I need this." She frowned, "I've been thinking about what my next steps were going to be. I'm not giving up on Bucky, I _can't_. If taking out the scattering remains of HYDRA makes the world safer for him to come back to, then I want to help…even if it's not physical...actually, if it's all the same to you and the rest of the team, I'd like to stay as far from the actual action as much as possible. Maybe I can be tech support or something..." The Russian's features suddenly seemed closed off and stiff, green eyes seemingly haunted as she considered the mutant's words. Alice studied the woman's features for a moment before realization suddenly dawned on her, "You knew him...when he was the Winter Soldier...didn't you?"

"Alice, I'd rather no-"

"You did."

Natasha remained stiff, unmoving and stoic in the face of the mutant's acute observation and borderline accusation. She had nearly forgotten how perceptive Alice could truly be and her brow furrowed as she considered how to go about explaining her relationship with the Winter Soldier without harming the other woman or triggering another downward spiral to her mental health. After a few moments of drawn out silence, the mutant's brows furrowed, her arm leaning against the dresser to keep her balance.

"Was it when you were with the KGB?"

"No," Natasha finally forced, wincing at the bite in her own words and watching as Alice's posture tensed, her features flickering with anxiety before settling back into her own version of aloof detachment. "It was while I was in the Red Room. He was my teacher." When the mutant's features didn't waver she sighed softly, her throat working around the words that seemed lodged in her throat. "I met him again five years ago. I was escorting a nuclear engineer out of Iran, he shot out my tires near Odessa. We lost control, went straight over a cliff, I pulled us out, but the Winter Soldier was there. I was covering my engineer, so he shot him straight through me."

Alice's eyes tightened around the edges and Natasha wondered suddenly if she should have said anything at all. But she knew her friend was stubborn and regardless of what _she_ had wanted, she knew that in a way the mutant deserved to know how she knew him if only to prepare her for what still lay ahead of them. She already knew Steve intended to hunt him down and find him, they had spoken about it on the phone the night before and she had already called in the few favors she needed to secure the file that would tell them what the Winter Soldier - James Barnes - had endured the last 70 years or so. Natasha watched as the mutant's façade seemed to crumble - the mask she so cleverly put into place fell apart like porcelain.

Taking a deep breath, Alice winced, "I know he's done awful - _terrible_ \- things and I certainly don't ask that you tell me everything that he's done or not done to you personally, Nat...but it wasn't his own mind. The James Barnes I knew and loved - _still love_ \- would never _willingly_ hurt anyone if he could avoid it. Even in the theater of war...he never wanted that." Her breath shuddered in her lungs and passed trembling lips, "We've all done things we regret...God knows I've got plenty of red in my ledger that I think about and really wonder if I feel guilty or if I want to change. I've spent time on both sides of the debate where I am the problem and I'm trying to fix the problem, but I know I owe it to him to try my damnedest to be better...because if I can be forgiven for things I've done with conscious intent and free will...why shouldn't he have that same opportunity? That same understanding or compassion?"

Natasha stared at the mutant for a long moment, considering what she said. She had read Alice's file quite extensively two years ago when she had been tasked with bringing her in after recruiting Bruce Banner. She had assumed someone like Clint would have been sent in had the situation been different, but Natasha had learned quite a lot from the archer over the many years of their friendship - recruitment being the last of it, but still she had learned enough to ascertain whether or not someone was redeemable or not.

She couldn't fault Alice for her thoughts and concerns as they were valid and carefully thought out. It was true that she had done much worse than assassinate her perceived targets after escaping from the lab she had been held captive in. The details listed in the mutant's file could have easily been considered serial and borderline mass murder, however, Fury insisted that she could be trusted and would only resort to such measures if truly threatened. Natasha had done terrible things herself and had been spared when Clint had realized that she could be more than what she was while working for the KGB and the Red Room. Neither woman had the right to judge someone who hadn't made the choice to utilize their training or choose their assignment and as much as Natasha wanted to argue the matter, she found she couldn't.

Yes, she remembered the Winter Soldier - cold and terrible and intimidating - when he had been brought to the Red Room by Madame B to instruct her _little spiders._ He had been terrifying to the young Russian, but she had completed each task and learned what she could from the strange man. From a young child she had been manipulated into believing that becoming a spy was serving her country and would provide her with a purpose in life. It hadn't been until she had become a teenager and realized the implications of what becoming a Spider meant and that ultimately she would amount to nothing. She would be a tool and nothing more, her graduation ceremony had made certain of that. _She didn't have a place in the world_ , the words echoed from deep in her subconscious in the alluring and heavily accented voice of her instructor and she withheld the fear that seemed to leak from the door in her mind that she had hidden her trauma behind so long ago now.

She would be better. She _had_ a place in the world. She had friends to prove it.

She repeated the words in her mind for a time before the thoughts drifted away as the mutant shifted, her arm seeming to shake with the weight she was putting on it to hold her up.

"We all deserve a chance to change," she said finally. Alice offered her a weak smile before sighing through her nose, her eyes drifting away from the Russian.

"I still want to help...no matter what capacity it's in. I owe it to him to at least try."

Natasha's look was appraising before she sighed, her features softening, "I don't foresee that being a problem...at least promise me that you'll at least take the next two weeks to heal before you jump back in to physical work."

"I…can try to manage that," The mutant frowned. "You're aware how my mutation works then."

Her question wasn't one, Natasha realized as hazel eyes searched her as if trying to read her and the woman couldn't help but sigh again, "I read your file when I was sent to collect you in 2012."

The revelation didn't surprise Alice in the slightest; in fact, she would have been more surprised if the woman hadn't read her file before being sent to hunt her down. As she took in Natasha she realized that the redhead was looking at her with perhaps the most open expression she had ever seen. It was clear that Natasha didn't want to lie to her and knew that it was her way of extending trust and Alice was aware that it was a lot for the former-spy. She had noticed the dynamic change around her when she had seen her in the hospital lobby and wondered if it was from the falling of S.H.I.E.L.D or if Steve had said something to her at some point. She remembered encouraging the patriot in getting to know the spy and knew that they would make a great team if he could learn to work around Natasha's cagey personality and backhanded answers, her faux confidence and knowledge in situations where she felt overwhelmed or confused. It didn't miss the mutant's attention that the former-spy and patriot had gotten closer and she knew to file those thoughts away for a later time.

The woman standing in front of her was not the same woman from a week ago and, Alice realized, neither was she. It was a strange realization for the mutant to come to and she was once again reminded that time was binary and nothing ever seemed to last forever. Pushing these thoughts away the mutant took in the taller woman and the way she seemed expectant and Alice wondered if she was anticipating anger or surprise.

"So, you're aware that two weeks will only leave my newer muscles just atrophied. I need to at least do some work to build back up again. Time will allow my bones to refuse stronger, but if I don't at least do basics, my muscles won't regain strength."

Natasha blinked at the admission, "That wasn't in your file."

"No," She shrugged, "It's not common knowledge and I redacted that small bit of information when I hacked S.H.I.E.L.D's main server in 2008. It _is_ the major drawback to my mutation, among other things and it takes me significant time to recuperate when I have to regrow pieces of myself; muscles, bones, organs…blood pathways take the longest, but it's not impossible, but it takes considerable amounts of energy for me to do it."

"Hence the long periods of sleep…I remember Clint had to practically hold you up after the battle of New York…and three days ago…"

Alice nodded, "The more damage I sustain the longer it takes me to recover. It also causes my weight to fluctuate…When I have to regrow parts of my body the bones don't have much density to them…much like a newborn's or an infant's structure of strength. The longer I go without sustaining damage the more dense my bones or muscles are…if I were to step on a scale right now I'd probably be about 80 pounds…if I hadn't sustained the damage to my bones like I did I'd be about 145 maybe more if I was lucky." She then shrugged, "I don't own a scale, but the differences can be noticeable if you know what to look for."

"Your steps…"

"That's one," Alice smiled, "but my gait changes. I purposely position my body differently and mimic gaits in order to move better. It depends on my weight at the time, but it's why I would hit harder in some of our training."

"I'd wondered about that," Natasha admitted and the mutant shrugged, wincing a moment later when she jarred her sore shoulders. It was then Natasha took the time to consider the woman standing, slightly hunched over, in front of her. Alice normally carried herself in a way to make herself appear taller – mostly due to her shorter stature around people taller than herself – and tended to walk as if she was a feline or even a fox despite being slightly pigeon-toed and with the explanation in her mind, Natasha realized that it was a way to balance with her heavier body. She assumed that the constant change to her density also affected her balance and so she had to change the way she walked just to adjust and the former-spy found herself frowning. How long had it taken Alice to figure out the smaller intricacies of her own mutation without help? Her question must have conveyed on her features because the mutant offered her a smile.

"I figured a lot of it out in the early 1800s. I started out by studying animals…foxes being the earlier inspiration and then large cats as time went on because their weight constantly changes. They shift their bodies in a way that helps them maintain balance and it's something I tend to struggle with."

"Which is also why you need help now," Natasha nodded as if following the mutant's explanation.

"Right…It's awkward and an inconvenience and normally I spend an annoying amount of time not really wearing or doing anything because I don't have the right amount of strength to do simple tasks."

It was the most candid about her mutation Alice had ever been and Natasha blinked. Steve had taken time to tell them about parts of her mutation while they had been searching for her, stating that – so long as she hadn't sustained significant physical damage – she wouldn't have trouble surviving. The former-spy's mind quickly recalled the video she had found of Alice fighting what could have only been the Winter Soldier at the bank she had been held at and how even before she had been forced into the fight she had appeared to be barely hanging on and then recalled how she had specifically guarded her right side. Her sharp mind recalled the injuries she had only immediately noticed in the video and the way Alice had looked in the hospital lobby and she was suddenly not surprised at how Alice had merely dropped when it seemed her body had run completely out of energy.

"My body can't heal without energy," She continued despite the thoughts now circling Natasha's mind, "Generally I've learned to pull energy from other parts of my body naturally to heal other places while under duress, but ultimately sleep is the main mode at retaining that energy…at least from what I've figured out. If I do too much to draw energy, I tend to force my body to overwork and it causes fevers that go beyond normal temperatures, but the whole _not dying_ thing kinda prevents me from ever truly shutting down."

Natasha's trimmed brow arched, "I have to ask why you're telling me this…"

"I thought we were doing the whole trust and honesty thing," Alice remarked with a humored twitch to her lips. "I'm surprised you never asked beforehand."

"I didn't want to push." Alice's brow arched slightly at the woman's whispered confession. It was as if the other woman hadn't meant to say it at all, "I know how private you are and after everything I didn't want to make you any more uncomfortable than you already were."

Alice stared at Natasha as if for the first time. While they had a decent friendship between the two and a good relationship as a student/teacher, she had never considered how thoughtful Natasha was. Perhaps it was because they had things in common especially when it came down to their time being controlled by others, but they had found kindred spirits in each other and while Natasha had a tendency to frustrate the mutant, she knew that the woman was as genuine as she allowed herself to be. Alice considered her own point for a moment before allowing an easy smile to tug at her lips and it only widened when Natasha seemed to blink as if in surprise despite her face not changing.

"I knew I liked you best."

Natasha couldn't help the laugh that bubbled passed her lips before nodding to the mutant, "I do have another question though."

"Shoot."

"Your right side," She watched as Alice's body tensed. Of course, the former-spy had seen the scarred flesh that seemed to span the entire right side of the mutant's body starting beneath where her bra would rest and to her boney hip. The skin had been puckered and raised against the normal smoothness of her pale skin and it had surprised her when she noticed that the scarring looked fresh instead of two years old. Normally Alice's scars would go away relatively quick, but there was something odd about the scar and on the same side was the experimentation number burned into the inside of her arm. "Why does it look fresh?"

Alice chewed her bottom lip before sighing, "The blast from Loki's scepter was unlike any other injury I've ever gotten. The Tesseract's composition is to dissolve organic matter. When I took the blast for Steve I hadn't considered that the scepter would draw power from the cube. After looking into a bit more I realized that it also must have obeyed the will of its master in a way…Loki may have been trying to use us against each other, but I think he was truly trying to kill Steve and when it hit me the intent didn't change. Unless he was aiming for me to begin with, but it's hard to know for sure." She ignored the stare she received and shrugged again, "As for why it looks the way it does I can't answer. It took me a long time to even heal it to where I could move without limping everywhere and even still I feel like my body is still fighting the properties of the blast despite it being years later. It flares up every once and a while and I notice when I'm in a tough situation I try to avoid leaving that side open…"

"It's definitely noticeable."

"My right side has always had a harder time healing than my left," Alice sighed as she sat on the edge of the bed so she could begin pulling on her boots, which she just noticed were clean and free of mud and debris and reminded herself to thank the woman for helping her once again, "It's been that way since I was taken by Department K in the 60s."

Natasha could tell by the sudden shuddering in her expression not to ask the question that had been on the tip of her tongue and instead gestured to the boots that the mutant was mid-way through working her feet into, "You got that alright?"

"I'll be alright," The mutant smiled slightly, "I may need you to help me sit back up, but I can at least work through this."

When she was finished she nodded to Natasha who helped her sit back before helping her back to her feet. Alice was unbalanced as she followed the woman out of Sam's house and to the car, her hands constantly braced outwards as if ready to catch herself and it made Natasha frown, but didn't move to help her. After the two had settled in the car, Natasha pulled out of the driveway and merged into the heavier-than-usual DC traffic. During the drive the two women spoke about mundane things including the music station that was currently humming gently in between them. Alice tended to prefer older music, her favorite being the 1940s jazz and the age of rock that spanned between the 60s to the late 90s (grunge rock being a guilty pleasure) and then it petered off as she wasn't a large fan of country or pop music, though she enjoyed working out to hip hop. Natasha seemed to not care what kind of music it was so long as it had a decent enough beat, if her drumming fingers were anything to go by when an obscure Britney Spears song played on the speakers.

The plan for that day was that Natasha was going to drop Alice back off at the hospital and she was going to stay with the guys for a while before Steve was hopefully discharged and she would meet up with them later. Natasha had been mindful of Alice's triggers and had asked her specifically before agreeing to it and the mutant had told her it would be fine. The former-spy had relayed the plan to Sam and along with it a reminder to be mindful of Alice's body language throughout the day. Pulling up to the hospital Natasha turned her eyes to the mutant her brows pinched.

"Are you going to be okay?"

"Yeah," Alice nodded as she gathered herself, "but it may be easier for me to get into the room if Sam comes down to –" She blinked when the man in question came jogging out to the car and turned to look at the former-spy who was wearing an expression similar to a cat who had gotten the canary. "You're insufferable."

"You're welcome."

Alice rolled her eyes good-naturedly as she opened the door, "Thanks, Nat and good luck today."

"Thanks Alice, I'll see you guys when it's over."

"We'll keep you updated," Sam nodded to the redhead before glancing at Alice's small form seemingly dwarfed in one of his crewneck sweatshirts and looking almost smaller than usual. "You ready to head up?"

"Yeah, just let me get myself out of the car."

Sam's brow quirked, but he said nothing as he offered her his arm and allowing her the choice to use it if she wanted it. After a moment she took the arm and used Sam's weight to pull herself from the car before nodding to Natasha and closing the door behind her. The two watched as Natasha's car pulled away and disappeared back into traffic before Alice looked up at the taller man and nodding to him, "It's nice to see you Sam…thanks for letting me crash at your place."

"Trust me," Sam smiled, "you're welcome to stay as long as you like. We already reached out to your ranch-hands and told them to hold down the fort…I'm sure you'll have plenty of messages to look through."

"You guys got in touch with Ian and Dan?"

The man nodded as he helped her into the lobby, measuring his steps to her own and allowing her to lean on him whenever she needed it. "Yeah, Nat figured that you'd need to be here for a few days and didn't want you to push yourself until you were ready."

"Thank you."

Sam looked down at her and offered her a smile, "Not a problem, Chewie."

"I definitely think I should be Solo now…you're definitely the smarter one."

"Maybe," He chuckled, "I _am_ taller than you."

"You know, it's not very fun when you _actually_ agree with me."

The man threw his head back and laughed as he led her to an elevator and trying to fight the grin on his lips from her pouted expression. He took in the appearance of her and watching as she fidgeted slightly, her fingers twitching as if she wasn't sure what to do with them. The sleeves of his sweatshirt had been folded up slightly over her wrists and exposing the yellowed splotches along her forearms, the edge of the sweatshirt hanging down about her mid-thigh where black leggings covered her smaller legs – smaller than he remembered – and her boots tightened almost impossibly around her calves. He wasn't entirely sure how to phrase his question and when she seemed to catch his stare she explained most of her appearance to him and how it was mostly caused by her mutation as she had for Natasha that morning. When they reached the floor Steve's room was located the former Pararescuer felt more at ease and understood the unevenness to her gait much more.

Again he offered his arm and seemed to relax when she took it, offering him an awkward smile, "Thanks for all of this Sam…including letting me steal your clothes."

"They look better on you anyway, baby girl."

For the first time in days she threw her head back and laughed – the flirtatious tone not missed on her – and Steve looked up upon hearing it, relief flooding his face. Alice stepped into the room and offered her friend a smile. It was less bright than it usually was, but it showed a level of healing that the patriot was surprised to see and while it looked genuine, the tightness around her eyes gave her anxiety away. Alice was still in relative flight or fight mode and her eye searched for exits and windows, the action not missed to either man in the room as Sam led her to an unoccupied chair on the other side of Steve's bed before leaning himself against the wall.

"How're you feeling?"

If Steve was surprised by her speaking first he didn't show it, "I'm holding up. Thanks for getting me here."

Alice inclined her head, the shorter strands of her hair tickling her cheeks, "You're welcome…I wasn't just going to leave you there."

"How're you holding up?"

The mutant considered the question for a few moments before sighing softly, "I mean...not fantastic, but I'm still alive so I guess that count's for something."

A tense silence suddenly fell on them as the patriot chewed on the question he was dying to ask. That morning when Natasha had called and said that Alice wanted to come see him, Sam had immediately told Steve that he should probably keep questions about Bucky to a minimum and the patriot had reluctantly agreed, but he couldn't shake the knowledge that he had been pulled out of the river by his old friend. He contemplated a way to ask her but was surprised when Alice shifted, her hazel eyes watching his face and seeming to pluck his question out of his features alone.

"I, um, found him there…when I found you."

"Bucky?"

The audible groan from Sam was ignored when Alice nodded, "He…I think he remembered you – _us_ – to some degree."

"He spent our entire fight calling me his mission, it's just –"

"Hard to understand," Alice interrupted with a sigh before turning her gaze away from her friend her tone coming out at a hard edge that had both men wincing. "Pierce's doing. When I woke up in that bank they were working on his arm…repairing it from the fight with you." She ignored the shifting of Sam as if the man were nervous or uncomfortable and Steve sitting up on the bed and ignored both of their gazes as she began playing with a loose seam on Sam's sweatshirt, "He knew us and when he said this he was _punished_ and they…" She swallowed around the tightness in her throat as Bucky's screams echoed in her memory, "They wiped his memory and suddenly he wasn't Bucky anymore."

"Alice…"

"It was a machine…in the bank. The last one I saw was during my time as an experiment…not exactly the same one, but similar enough that I knew what it was. I was never subjected to it, my mutation would make it impossible for it to actually work, but I've seen it used on others before..." The obvious _and Bucky_ went unsaid. She breathed out sharply before returning her eyes to Steve's before her gaze bounced between him and Sam as if willing them to understand, "He looked so helpless, but…it had to have been a conditioning thing because he _knew_ what was about to happen, but let them do it anyway."

"You think that's how they controlled him?"

Alice's gaze met Sam's and she nodded, "Back in 1943 – it could've been 1944 at the time for all I knew – I had been taken hostage by HYDRA after the 107th got captured in the middle of a gunfight with the German troops at the Battle of Azzano…We were transported to a base in Austria where they were using labor camps similar to the Concentration Camps Jews were forced into, but these camps belonged to the Nazi deep science department known as HYDRA," She explained this more for the former Pararescuer's benefit, knowing that Steve already knew this. "It was there that most of the captured 107th was being held along with hundreds of men from other Allied forces and in that base was a room – a lab – that they called an isolation ward where Steve and I were told no one ever came out alive. Bucky was taken there a few days or so before we got there."

Steve took over as emotion seemed to choke the words from Alice's throat, "We freed everyone, but I wasn't leaving without him and went to go find him. He was strapped to a table mumbling when I got to him and even then he barely recognized me."

Sam looked back and forth between the two of them, "Shit guys…"

"Yeah," Alice said softly after clearing her throat. "He refused to tell anyone what happened, but after treating what wounds he _did_ sustain and what I know now, the torture he underwent in Austria included the same device that was used on him recently. The markers around his eyes were consistent with the ones back then."

"I should've known." Steve sighed softly, "It took him a while to fully recognize me and when he finally did I don't doubt he thought he was already dead or dying...I brushed it off thinking it was because the serum changed so much about me physically, but I think it went deeper than that. If I had known...maybe we could've gotten him help sooner...sent him home so none of this would've ever happened."

Alice shook her head, her expression becoming fierce as she glared at Steve, "Don't you do that…don't you _dare_ blame yourself for what that son of a bitch did to him. There's nothing that _you_ or _anyone_ could've done, Steve. He refused to talk about it and the documents that would've clued us in were destroyed when the base blew up."

"That Arnim Zola guy…right?" When they both nodded, Sam sighed softly. "Well, I'd bet there's a way to get him back…right?"

"Maybe," Alice nodded slowly, "They mentioned something about him being out of cryo too long and I'd bet it's how they managed to control his memories or him." She frowned, "It worked back in the 40s, anyway, so I bet time is a factor and now that HYDRA is scattered, I'm sure Bucky will be on the run…but maybe we can take some of the heat off of him."

Sam watched the contemplative look come over her face and he shook his head, "No. No whatever you're planning, _no_ , Al that's insane."

"What?"

Sam almost laughed at the confused look on the patriot's face as his head swiveled between the him and the glare that Alice had leveled at him, "She's going to try and throw off the authorities by leaving digital traces…or am I wrong?" When her glare became sharp he knew he was right, "You have absolutely no way of knowing where he is. If you do all of that, what's to say you lead them straight to him?"

"I don't know," Alice sighed, her posture slouching as if suddenly exhausted, "you're right…but if I can uncover some of the HYDRA files that were part of the data dump that Natasha leaked, maybe I can at least put doubt in their minds enough that it'll allow him to slip through easier."

Sam frowned, "Isn't that the exact _opposite_ of what we want?"

"Look, I'm just brain storming, but I'd much rather it be _us_ that finds him before law enforcement does and especially before any remaining heads of HYDRA do."

"You still think they're out there?"

"Of course I do," Alice answered Steve as she looked at him from behind where she cradled her forehead with her hand as if her neck were to weak to hold her head, "It would be unwise for us to assume they're not…especially given what you and I know about them."

"You're not throwing yourself back into everything immediately are you?"

"No," She sighed softly, "if anything I'll be crunching data behind a computer while I build my body back up to where it was. I'm physically useless right now and it would be stupid of me to think I can run head first into another fight. We're going to have to get the other Avengers involved…they're the only ones left I'd throw my trust in with."

Steve looked disturbed by the casual way she dismissed herself and upon looking at Sam it appeared he felt the same way. Before either man could rebuke her statement she shot them both an unamused look and frowned.

"Oh _please_ , don't pretend you boys haven't noticed that I'm no more useful than a paperweight. It will take me time and I'm not ignorant of that, but fighting right now is out of the question for me. The most I'll be able to do is help chase down leads digitally while helping take out the remainder of HYDRA."

"Is that what you want?"

"Of course it's not what I want," She snapped acerbically, "I'd much rather go back to being able to at the very least defend myself and not feel like I'm just occupying space, but we don't always get what we want. It's unfortunately not my first time going through this and I doubt it'll be my last, but if we can get him before they do I'd sleep better at night."

"Allie, I'm not giving up."

Steve watched her intently as the words passed his lips. He knew she was spiraling as her knee started bouncing indicating her anxiety. Steve knew her probably better than most and knew that the self-deprecation was not completely unusual, but her lack of confidence and her snappy responses were certainly new developments. Natasha had pointedly told him over the phone that she had recovered the footage from the bank and that Alice had quite literally been dehumanized and it made him angry, but seeing the aftereffects in person was much different than hearing someone else talk about them and in retrospect Steve wished he had fought harder to find her. He watched as she seemed relieved, yet at the same time didn't seem to believe him – her eyes shifting and hidden behind the still-bruised lids, long lashes brushing her cheeks. She was nervous, but above everything she was angry and frustrated, but whether it was at herself or someone else he couldn't say.

"I wouldn't expect you to," She said after a moment before her eyes flickered to Sam as he cleared his throat.

"I'm not trying to be a downer here, and I want to help, but where do we even start?"

Silence fell between the trio as they began to consider their next moves, during which time the doctor had come in and explained that Steve would be discharged and had gone to go get the paperwork. Alice was suddenly very jealous of the super-soldier serum. She was startled from her thoughts when Steve cleared his throat, his blue eyes searching her smaller-than-normal form as if caught in memory.

"You've been on the run before…"

Her brow quirked, "Yes…"

"What would you do if you were Buck in this situation?"

Sam's chocolate eyes bounced between the two, his hand running over his facial hair before cupping his chin as he tried to follow the conversation. He hadn't known she had ever been on the run before, but with an educated guess he concluded it must have been from her constant mention as an experiment. Alice settled back into the chair, not having strength to actually stand at the moment and stared at the ceiling above her in thought.

"It was a little different the last time I was on the run…I wasn't hiding from Department K and I certainly wasn't brainwashed – I was hiding from S.H.I.E.L.D and Fury…" She frowned, her eyes narrowing on the popcorn ceiling as she thought. "If I were in his place I'd start with what I knew…for him it's probably a safe house or…" Sam jumped at the speed her head had snapped forward and she looked to him, her eyes wide, "Do you have your phone?"

"Y-yes?"

"Gimme," The command was short and he reached into his pocket pulling out his phone and unlocking the screen before giving it to her. For a few moments she focused on the screen before her slightly hopeful look turned to dread. "Damnit…"

"What?"

"The bank where he and I were being kept…" She frowned, "it's gone."

"Gone?" Sam frowned as he looked at the woman, "What do you mean gone? A bank doesn't just disappear…" Alice turned the phone to him to see that the building lay destroyed and still burning from behind the news reporter as they covered what they believed to be caused by the damage over the Potomac, but they knew differently. "Oh…I stand corrected."

"You think it was Bucky."

Alice frowned and nodded, her gaze piercing, "It was where they wiped his mind and held him when he wasn't on the field. Rumlow did more than have soldiers beat the shit out of me, Steve, and it's not my first rodeo being caught and in turn gathering information when they don't want me to. Bad guys monologuing is starting to become an overdone cliché."

"That time during the Revolution?"

"No," She smiled ruefully, "Austria."

Steve shook his head, "You never did say how HYDRA managed to capture you…only that everyone at the field hospital had been killed."

"Maybe now isn't the best time," She offered, her look becoming haunted and the patriot frowned at the sight. "I hadn't meant to be the only survivor, let's leave it at that."

"So," Sam interjected in an effort to steer the two back on course, ignoring as a nurse appeared with Steve's discharge papers, "where would he go if not back to his handlers?"

Alice cupped her chin in thought, "I don't know."

"We'll think on the road," Steve stated as he stood from the bed, dropping his phone on the bed where it had just alerted him to a text and taking the clothes Sam had apparently had for him into the bathroom. Once alone, Sam turned his attention to the mutant and frowned softly.

"You alright over there, Pidge?"

"Pidge?"

"Yeah," He smirked, "Now that you're flyweight at most…and because you've been walking pigeon-toed."

"I _am_ pigeon-toed," Alice said with an amused smile twitching at her lips, "been that way since I could walk…my parents thought it was some birth defect."

"Oh?"

"Turns out my mutation enjoys making my life more difficult whenever necessary," She shrugged, "By the way, keep with the movie references…those are much better."

"Well, Pidge is a character from a TV show so I guess that it's still fair game." When her eyebrow arched incredulously he couldn't help but frown, "Do you not know what TV show that's from?"

"Not that I'm aware of?"

"Voltron, 1984?" At her blank look his jaw dropped, "Alright, remind me when we have time to make you watch it."

"Consider my schedule open?"

"Good," Sam smirked, "You're not getting out of this one that easily."

Alice merely rolled her eyes before holding her hand out in a clear sign that she needed help and the former Pararescuer nodded, helping her stand and giving her time to regain her balance before turning as Steve reappeared. He looked between the two of them as if just seeing how much smaller the woman looked to him for the first time. Alice was swimming in the sweatshirt she had borrowed from Sam and he couldn't help but think of how slim and how tiny he had been before for serum and his concern for her only mounted. She looked sickly and he felt a pang of hurt center in his chest. Though she had explained her mutation to him in detail, to see it actually affecting her was something he hadn't prepared himself for and guilt settled like a lead ball in his stomach.

"You two ready to go?"

"Sure, get me a walker and I'll be able to keep up," She joked earning a laugh from Sam and a forced smile from the patriot. "Seriously, I'll be fine…Sam why don't you bring your car around. Steve and I'll catch up."

"Sure thing, Pidge."

"Still don't get that reference!"

Steve watched as the man left and he offered his arm to the smaller woman. Alice took it gratefully and allowed him to lead her throughout the wing and to the elevator. "You two seem…close?"

She quirked a brow at the taller man, "I'm sorry?" She studied his face for a moment before she stopped her mouth dropping open, ignoring when Steve hit the call button for the elevator. "Did you think… _seriously_?"

"What!?"

"Oh, come _on_ Steve, you have to be kidding!?"

"Am I _wrong_?" He frowned, anger she hadn't anticipated twisting his features. Alice clenched her jaw, her eyes tightening around the corners and their color darkening to cinnamon.

"In another life? Maybe, but I'm doomed to the one I live and I'm not dragging anyone through this…never again." She turned her eyes to Steve and cut him with a glare so fierce he nearly flinched, "And with everything going on and Bucky back from the grave – how _dare_ you even insinuate anything going on between me and Sam!? Do you think so _little_ of me?" She didn't let him try and rebuke her statement as the elevator came and she stepped in slamming her hand on the lobby button before hitting the close door before Steve could step into the contraption and he didn't stop her.

Her blood boiled in her veins as she rode the elevator by herself to the ground floor, her jaw working in an effort to stem her sudden ire. She was deeply offended and while she knew that Steve probably hadn't meant to infer she and Sam were together – or at least considering it, she couldn't help but be vexed. Had Steve asked her that question a few days ago she probably wouldn't have even been mad, perhaps she would have laughed about it and called him an idiot, but the timing couldn't have been worse. Her nerves were beyond frayed - being in the hospital had kicked her anxiety up to a point where she had felt the beginnings of another attack coming on, but had forced herself to focus on the loose seam on the sweatshirt she had been wearing as a distraction. Hospitals in general reminded of her time as an experiment and in what she dared only refer to as _The Box_ and she was suddenly realizing what an awful idea it had been to visit the patriot before he had been discharged.

" _Fuck_."

She snarled at herself as her mind began to mess with her - recalling every bad thing that had happened within the last few days and desperately wondering why she had bothered to get involved. A second later her mind helpfully supplied that had she found out Bucky had been alive and Steve had failed to tell her she would have been more furious then just going through the last few days. Natasha had been a wonderful help in grounding Alice whenever she could especially that morning considering the mutant had slept through three solid days as her body and mutation desperately attempted to fix all of the damage done to her, but Alice hadn't been entirely truthful with her either. Yes, sleeping or hibernation was essential to her body fusing together and healing, but three days after the amount of damage she had sustained was laughable.

The truth was simply that Alice couldn't spend another hour in Sam's small guest room without associating it with a cell as her mind consistently battled between distinguishing the comfortable room with her cell within Department K. She had to consistently remind herself that Natasha was not one of the scientists assigned to dose her with another unnamed drug, but her friend and she had even had to remind herself that Sam was not a guard meant to keep her in line when he had merely stood at the door to give her the only available seat in the room.

She pulled at the collar of the sweatshirt and swore again as she felt a cold sweat break out on her forehead as the walls seemed to cave in around her and she squeezed her eyes shut for a moment as she tried to slow and steady her breathing. When she had first escaped the lab she couldn't stay indoors without feeling like the walls were caving in around her no matter how open the space had been. Pierce had been calculating in placing her in a small cubicle-like cell and was undoubtedly meant to trigger her memory of what her imprisonment had been like and she hated that it had worked.

Forcing her eyes open she was able to take in her warped image in the steel of the elevator and it did nothing to make her feel better and she growled to herself before glaring at her feet. Steve's words suddenly flooded to the forefront of her mind and she latched onto that anger in an effort to chase away her fear. The flirting between her and Sam had been harmless – the former Pararescuer knew her relationship with Bucky and had asked her about it on their drive to Fort Meade and while she kept it brief and expressed not wanting to talk about it he had understood and kept the joking light hearted. He had even admitted to preferring Latinas, offering her an awkward smile and asking her not to take offense to which she had laughed and said that Romanians were more her speed anyway. She hadn't realized her statement had even been funny until he had laughed so hard he nearly slammed his head into the dashboard before the two had begun talking about movies instead – the two staying away from sensitive topics like Bucky and his old friend and comrade Riley.

Alice had a deep respect for Sam in the short time he knew him and found him to be insanely genuine which had surprised her. He actually reminded her of her younger sister, Catherine: courageous, witty and undeniably loyal and outspoken. She considered herself to be jaded with humanity, but accepted that perhaps they had a few diamonds in the rough and considered herself lucky to have found many of them.

She scoffed again at her thoughts as the elevator hit the ground floor and she stepped out into the lobby, ignoring the looks she received as her gait betrayed her anger and made her look like a newborn horse or deer as she staggered and limped. If it hadn't been for her clothes she probably would have been dragged back by hospital staff thinking she was a patient.

Upon reaching the door she ignored Steve's calls for her to wait, stepping out into the open air and stalking as quickly as she could manage to Sam's car. Meeting her eyes the former Pararescuer frowned, opening his mouth to ask and immediately shutting it when she leveled him with a glare so cold it nearly made him flinch. She marched towards the backseat, opening the door and slamming it behind her.

Sam met Steve's eyes, his brow quirked in question and the patriot had enough decency to look abashed before slowly climbing into the passenger seat. Hurt settled in Alice's chest sharply once more and she practically vibrated with her ire before meeting Sam's eyes in the rearview mirror. The man frowned in confusion before breathing out and hitting the button for his radio and pulling away from the curb.

The car ride to the cemetery was completed in silence and the Falcon spent most of it with his eyes darting between driving and between Steve and Alice. Something had to have happened after he left the room and he couldn't help but wonder what. It was rare to see them disagree on anything and hadn't since he had met them, but he knew something had transpired between them and he would wait until the dust settled more before he broached the subject with either of them. The three soon made it to the cemetery and standing there was a hooded figure that could only be Nick Fury.

Alice stepped out of the car first and slowly made her way up the hill as steadily as she could, her stubbornness winning out as she forced herself to maintain her gait – as unstable as it was. Fury only offered her a quirked brow from behind his sunglasses and he must have quickly concluded as to her appearance before glancing briefly to Steve and Sam who had stepped up next to them. The former S.H.I.E.L.D director sighed after a moment, taking in the gravestone that Maria Hill had taken care of after his public death.

"So, you've experienced this sort of thing before."

Steve glanced at him and offered him a half-hearted smile, "You get used to it."

Alice ignored the two as she looked down at the white marbled gravestone that held the man's name and epitaph which read " _The path of the righteous man: Ezekiel 25:17_ ". She sighed softly, her thoughts turning introspective and she wondered if perhaps she should have done the same at some point. She knew that her parents had erected a stone at Trinity Church in New York, but she had never spent time there for fear of being confronted with her own reality.

"We've been data-mining HYDRA's files," Fury was saying and bringing Alice's attention back to the man, "Looks like a lot of rats didn't go down with the ship. I'm headed to Europe tonight, wanted to ask if you'd come."

"There's something I gotta do first," Steve declined with a frown. Fury nodded before turning his gaze to Sam and then to Alice.

"How about you, Wilson? Could use a man with your abilities…or you Alexander?"

"I'm more of a soldier than a spy," Sam offered weakly and Alice shook her head.

"I've got to get back into a place where I'm not a liability, but if anything changes you'll be the first to know."

Fury offered her a knowing smile before extending his hand to Steve and Sam, shaking their hands before extending the hand to Alice with a significant look and smirking when she accepted it with a ghost of a smile of her own, "Alright then. Anybody asks for me, tell them they can find me right here."

"Fury," Alice called as he went to walk away and she nodded off to the side, silently asking to speak to him in private and ignoring the looks she received from the patriot and falcon. If Fury was surprised he didn't show it and stepped further away from the group with Alice tracing his steps awkwardly. "I wanted to apologize to you."

"What for?"

"For thinking the worst of you for so long," She answered and ignoring as his eyebrows shot up on his forehead, "Pierce told me that he had made you hunt me down…that you had gotten that assignment from him. After that I knew I couldn't hold you responsible and I wanted to thank you for being the one to put a bullet in his chest." She looked away from him, nodding briefly to Natasha who had been walking up to the two men of their team before returning her eyes to Fury's shaded ones. "I know it couldn't have been easy for you either, considering you had believed him to be a friend."

"Alexander, if it's one thing I've learned in this business it's to wait until someone shows you their hand. If they're to be trusted, then they'll do so without ulterior motive." He watched her carefully, "You also had a lot to teach me about letting a little trust go a long way."

She snorted softly before offering him a small smile, "I suppose there's a lot we can still learn from each other."

"Well, like I said – I'm off to Europe tonight. As soon as you need me, you let me know."

"Same here, Fury," She said with an earnest expression, "I want to hunt these bastards down…they've made their intentions clear for what they want with me and if I can make it easier for Bucky to come back to a world that isn't painting targets on people, I'd feel better about it."

Fury frowned, "You know what you're looking to do is near impossible."

"Yeah," She nodded in agreement, "but if there's even a small chance at success I want to take it."

The former director offered her a rare smile, "You know, Alexander. Once upon a time I would have recruited you for S.H.I.E.L.D without any type of motive other than you'd have made an exceptional agent."

She looked down and blushed, a small smile flickering at the edges of her mouth, "Funny how life works against what we want, huh?"

"Yeah…but my offer stands. Should you need anything you let me know."

"Keep your ears out, Fury." She advised with a small frown, "If you hear anything about him please don't hesitate to let me know."

"I will…and keep your head down if you can, Alexander." At the seriousness of Fury's tone the mutant met his eyes, "HYDRA isn't just looking for your man, but they're looking for _you_ …they're gonna be desperate and I'd hate for something else to happen to you that could have been preventable."

She smiled weakly, "I'll do my best."

"I have your number; I'll contact you from burners."

"Sounds good, Fury. Be careful."

"I'm always careful."

Alice watched as he turned away with a small wave before ducking into his car and disappearing. She had half a mind to track him, but knew that Nick Fury was the most talented spy she had ever met and knew that he would be fine. Shaking her thoughts she began her walk back up the hill to where the remainder of her group was and she frowned softly at noticing the file underneath Natasha's arm was being passed to Steve.

"That thing you asked for, I called in a few favors from Kiev." She was saying and glancing at Alice briefly as she stepped next to the taller woman, "Will you do me a favor? Call that nurse."

"She's not a nurse."

"And you're not a S.H.I.E.L.D agent," She chirped pleasantly with what Alice noticed immediately was a forced smile and earning a strained one from Steve.

"What was her name again?"

"Sharon. She's nice." She stepped forward and placed a kiss on his cheek before turning from them briefly, "Be careful, Steve. You might not want to pull on that thread." She warned him finally before stepping away and looking to Alice, "Be careful, Al…"

"You too, Nat," She offered the woman, "When you get reestablished drop a line, I could use a good workout."

"Will do."

Steve fingered the folder in his hands before frowning as he allowed the front cover to open, showing an image of Bucky in what he could only assume was the cryo-chamber in which he had been kept and paper clipped to the bottom was his military photo. He nearly jumped when Alice stepped up beside him, glancing at the file and wincing, her eyes screwing shut for a moment before her eyes seemed to skim the Cyrillic alphabet that made up the document.

"You're going after him."

"You don't have to come with us, Sam."

"I know," Sam offered a reassuring smile, his dark eyes bouncing from the patriot to the mutant in earnest, "When do we start?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** So we bring The Winter Soldier timeline to and end! It's been a bumpy frikken ride to this point y'all but we still got a long way to go for these guys! Alice is a sensitive bean in this chapter and of course her emotions are a wee bit frayed so it's truly no surprise she's not taking anything well.
> 
> Next chapter: we have Alice recovering, an archer's council and a peek at the file that belongs to one James Buchanan Barnes~
> 
> Also if you haven't, which I dunno why you wouldn't, check out simmerandcry's lovely Steve/Bucky/OC pairing Show Me, Don't Tell Me! It's centered in the MCU post-Snap/Thanos and if you haven't read it yet, you're truly missing out! It's such an incredible work and you'll definitely enjoy the development of her OC, Avery, and our favorite ex-HYDRA asset and Star Spangled Troll ;). In all seriousness go check it out!
> 
> Thanks for reading dears and I hope to see you all next chapter!
> 
> Much Love,  
> Eirlys xoxo


	17. All the King's Horses

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_17_

**Early June 2014**

"Damnit!"

Alice grunted as she dropped shakily to her feet, her arms aching and sweat seeming to pour from every pore of her body. Her hair, though pulled back in a higher messy bun than normal, stuck to her skin in damp curls. It had been a week and she had finally had enough of sitting around doing nothing, focusing instead on getting herself back to a decent weight and working on building her muscles.

She had gone back to her farm in Virginia and both Ian and Dan had doted on her hand and foot, not understanding that she needed independence in order to get better. She loved both of them dearly, but she had to threaten them with being fired if they didn't leave her alone. Ian had vehemently argued that if she didn't take more time off he would quit and leave her to do his job instead. Alice had quickly reconsidered and accepted, stating that she would be in her barn-converted-gym.

Sighing softly she brushed the stray strands from her face before grabbing her water bottle from the side of the room and gulping it down. Her sweat-slicking sports shirt clung to her despite it being marketed to _not_ cling uncomfortably to her, the sleeves pushed up to her elbows in order to hide the brand on her arm. She wore a matching set of biker shorts and wraps on her feet and hands in an effort to protect both from her work out and give her stability in both her ankles and wrists. Alice's legs had been the first to come back to strength and she could move easier and without the awkward gait if she purposely focused on the movement – the bones refusing and making her newly acquired bowed-legs a large inconvenience considering she had to relearn to walk with the newer addition to her long list of abnormalities – but her upper body left much to be desired.

"You're getting better," Clint praised as he passed her a towel which she took gratefully with a huffed nod. "It's not something that's going to just magically come back and your time holding the bar is getting better."

"It's not enough," She sighed after she had taken another swig from her water, swishing it around her mouth and spitting it to the side. "At this point you may as well lock me in Stark tower and let me work a computer."

"You wanna become a Stark employee?" He snorted, "Not enough hazard pay in the world if you ask me."

She leveled the man with a dry stare which he only smiled and shrugged at.

Clint had magically appeared nearly three days ago with his kids and Laura – the woman was a god-send and had taken over her house like a surly Commander and Clint had, after nearly picking her self-pitying self off of the floor of her basement, spirited her away in an effort to save her from the lecture she was sure to endure about the condition of the house. Alice hadn't been taking care of things in a particularly healthy way and the true visible representation of her inner turmoil revealed itself in the state of disarray of her home.

Cooper and Lila had been doing everything in an effort to cheer her up, by either drawing her pictures or making her small little crafts that she had immediately hung up with the largest smile she could manage to the children. Clint had recognized the state of her mind and had decided he was the best qualified to help her out as he was still dealing with his own PTSD from the Invasion of New York. It had gotten to the point where the two of them would sit together and he would play with her hair and style it.

" _It was a mission I had years ago_ ," he had explained when she had asked about it, " _I had to go undercover as a stylist to get close to a target and I'm a quick study…it's relaxing_." Alice had teased him for the continued hobby, but ultimately found it to be endearing and Laura had said it was amazing that she didn't need to go to a stylist if she didn't want to, earning a loud laugh from the mutant.

Alice shook her head to refocus herself, "No…you're right, but I bet I'd get pretty amazing benefits."

"Health care…bonuses?"

" _Paid vacation time_."

Clint threw his head back and laughed before flopping next to where she had sat on the bench just off to the side of the boxing ring they had set up two years ago and nudging her shoulder with his. "You know I wouldn't lie to you just to spare your feelings right?"

"I know," She sighed softly as she leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees and rubbing the back of her neck. "I hate this though…in the past I would just let my body naturally get itself sorted out, but now that I need it to be maintained more it's... _frustrating_."

"Maybe, but you _are_ getting better. We'll continue reps and keep working at the uneven bars." He explained, "We'll get you better in no-time, Kit, believe me."

 _That was true_ , she thought to herself as she looked at the whiteboard he had set up upon arriving with her daily exercise routine listed out. He and his family had shown up randomly and she could only assume it had been Natasha that had called him in as the Russian had been taking care of something personal. The board listed her daily regimen as well as a space for time as a way to show her progress and she knew Clint was right – she _had_ been improving, but she couldn't help but feel like it wasn't enough.

"Is this how you feel sometimes?"

"What do you mean?" He inquired as he took a sip of his own water, his brows arched questioningly.

"Being so _human_ surrounded by people who are impossibly not?"

"Look, I'm just a guy with a bow and arrow. It doesn't always make sense, but at the same time it does. This team needs people like you and me to keep their egos in check and remind them of the bigger picture. It's not easy, but it's what we're needed for."

She looked up at him from where she was leaned over and offered him a small smile, "I guess…I don't think I ever really asked, but how're you holding up?"

"Oh you mean after New York?" When she nodded he leaned back and sighed softly, "I still have nightmares, but I'm lucky enough to have Laura in my life to keep me from spiraling downwards."

She snorted on a laugh, "Hence why you let her take over my house?"

"Exactly," Clint smiled unabashedly, "You need people in your life sometimes that are outside the madness that this life forces on us. Nat told me what happened…how're you holding up?"

Alice couldn't deny that she woke up with plenty of nightmares within the last week, many of them centered around the bank where Pierce had ordered Bucky to beat her and it always ended in her death in some way - by his hand or Pierce's, it didn't ever seem to matter. It had left a hole in her chest that seemed to only open wider and wider after each episode as if it was a wound that someone kept twisting over and over and pouring salt, dirt and acid into after each reopening. She had woken more than once in a pool of her own sweat and screaming and Laura or Clint standing in the doorway of her darkened room with worry crossing their features, but mostly understanding. Neither would move into the room immediately, instead they would speak to her from the doorway before slowly entering, always leaving the doorway unblocked in the event her claustrophobia overpowered her and she needed an escape.

She thought on his question for longer than she thought she should, but when his hand rested on her shoulder, squeezing the sore muscle in comfort she looked back to him, her eyes clouded.

"It's…it's always worse before it's better," She spoke carefully and earning a nod from Clint, who she knew understood her better in that moment than anyone else. "It's been a while since I've had to constantly remind myself of that…I'm constantly looking for doorways, looking over my shoulder and constantly reminding myself that the people around me are friends and not anyone untrustworthy. I…" She fought through the emotion clogging her throat and strangling her words, using Clint's hand to anchor her and keep her from falling into the turmoil of her memories, "I can still see him…his eyes…they weren't _his_." She swallowed around another lump in her throat, fighting against the emotion burning at her sinuses and the welled tears in her eyes. "You know what the worst part was?" Clint waited patiently for her to continue, his hand heavy on her shoulder, "The worst part was that I couldn't _do_ _anything_ …I was so paralyzed by his memory…paralyzed by the knowledge that he's been fighting against his own mind and his captors for _seventy years_ and trying to resurface against everything they've done to him…paralyzed because I was _powerless_ to stop them – to change the outcome – to save him."

"Alice…"

"I was weak," She snorted, ignoring the tears that now leaked from her eyes and joined the moisture already clinging to her face, "and they showed me what they planned for me and that _terrifies_ me, Clint. They took the strongest man I've ever known and twisted him into something I know that he would never be if he had a choice in the matter."

She allowed herself to be pulled into the archer's embrace, her hand immediately latching onto his arm and allowing him to tuck her head into his shoulder, his head resting atop hers as he rocked her.

Laura Barton was a saint of a woman and she was aware that she put up with quite a lot especially when it came to the functionality of her own family. She raised two kids nearly by herself and soon it would be three – if she and Clint continued to try for another baby, such as it was – and managed an entire farm while he was doing his job in keeping them safe. Suddenly, and without warning, they had another addition to their small family in the form of a young mutant. At first Laura hadn't believed that she was older than any of them many times over as she was so small in comparison to even her, but she had soon found a friend in the Colonial-era woman – a woman that her husband affectionately called "Kit" or "Kid" much to the mutant's annoyance and his delight.

When Natasha had called Clint and explained that Alice shouldn't be left to her own devices, Laura hadn't thought anything of picking up her life and visiting the farm in Virginia that was so very much like the one they lived at in Missouri and she was happy they had. After motivating her kids to helping her clean the mutant's house she had stepped out of the old colonial home, leaving her kids in the hands of a very enthusiastic Ian and making her way to the barn that housed the at-home gym that Alice, Natasha and Clint had built. She stood in the doorway of the barn and stopped, her heart shuddering in her chest as she took in the scene of her husband holding a half sobbing mutant and him comforting her as if she was made of glass. It made her heart swell in love for the man and shatter at the same time that this strong woman she had gotten to know for two years was so undeniably broken.

She hesitated in the doorway for a few moments before her husband's blue eyes met hers and she knew immediately what she needed to do. Stepping into the gym she made her way closer to them and she crouched before the other woman, one hand resting on the mutant's knee and the other running back and forth in a soothing motion on her visible arm that hadn't been curled into her husband's side. Laura met Clint's eyes again and she began speaking softly to the mutant, coaxing her to not hold back and to release so she could begin healing.

"We've got you, Alice…we've got you."

The husband and wife knew that this went beyond heartbreak; they knew that it resided in the mutant's insecurities, the abuse she had survived over her long years and the way she viewed herself to the very fabric of her being. Laura had seen the same trauma echoed in her husband two years ago and Alice had offered to help them should they ever need it – a favor Laura had quickly called upon to help her family heal and it was only fair that the Bartons return that favor with interest. The two continued to comfort the mutant, coaching her through her feelings gently and telling her to do so in her own time – that they weren't going anywhere. After a while the sobs had stopped, but Clint kept the smaller woman tucked into him and Laura offered her a comforting smile.

"What set this off?"

Alice didn't answer, but she didn't need to as Clint spoke up, his voice soft, "Feeling behind, powerless…few other things mixed in too, but that's what we were talking about."

Laura turned doe-like eyes back to the other woman, "I know a little about that too…the feeling of not knowing whether you could change something by being there, or by protecting someone you love." She reached up and wiped the fresh tear tracks that tumbled down blotchy, freckled cheeks, "But sometimes we can't change the past, only how we let it affect us and move forward. If getting stronger is going to help you, then do that, but make sure whatever it is that drives you is reasonable. You can't put yourself down every time something doesn't go according to plan and I know that this advice doesn't apply to that handsome soldier," She smiled when Alice choked on a small laugh, "but take control of the things you can and everything will fall into place. I promise you, Alice, things will happen in time and as they're meant to, but you need to hold onto hope."

"And when it seems there is none?"

Clint's eyes flickered to his wife's to see that they shared the same concerning thoughts in regards to Alice's failing mental health. Laura turned her eyes back to the mutant, taking her face in her hands and wiping the still-cascading tears that ran unbidden with her thumbs, "When there doesn't seem to be hope that's when you need to look the hardest… _believe_ the hardest… _fight_ the hardest because hope is worth it _every single time_." She offered the mutant a gentle smile, "You never stop fighting for that hope…do you understand?" When Alice nodded with a watery laugh Laura smiled and pulled the mutant away from her husband and into a hug of her own. "Now come on, the kids did something special for you and I'm sure you're going to enjoy it."

"Alright…" She allowed Laura to wrap an arm around her shoulders before turning back to Clint and offering him a small smile. "Thanks, Clint…I know I'm not the easiest person to be around right now."

"You knock that off Alice Elizabeth." When she blinked at him owlishly he smirked, "I had time for research."

She couldn't help the laugh that bubbled passed her lips and she leaned into Laura's one-armed embrace before holding a hand out to him as well, the archer wasting no time in taking it and allowing the women to lead him out of the barn and back to the mutant's home. With coaxing Laura ushered Alice to go up and shower before coming back down which the mutant did willingly. She and Clint watched as she disappeared up the stairs before they looked to one another.

"I'm worried for her, Clint."

"Me too, honey…me too."

"Nat didn't say how _bad_ it was…" Laura frowned as she began pulling things out of the refrigerator to begin a quick meal for all of them. "Have you heard from the team?"

"Steve calls regularly, but Alice has kinda…frozen him out."

Laura turned, her long hair falling over her shoulder as she stared openly at her husband. "Isn't he practically her best friend?"

The archer nodded before offering his wife a helpless shrug, "I don't know what happened between them, but it's enough that Alice isn't looking to him or anyone for help. If we didn't force ourselves on her I doubt she would've allowed us to see how bad it really was."

"That or her employees would've said something," Laura sighed. "Ian and Dan are really trying, but you can tell they get a lot of their strength from her."

Clint nodded as he began helping his wife in preparing the chicken they were meant to have for dinner that night, the two moving as if in a single orbit, "They're good to have around for her, sure, but both of them aren't sure how to deal with this side of our lives…I've brought my problems home enough that I wish you didn't know how to deal with it so well either."

"Well," She shrugged, "That's why we're still together. We're a team and the minute you forget that Clint Barton is the day I hit you in the head with a shoe."

"Yes ma'am," He chuckled, the two moving around the kitchen easily, having worked in Alice's space before and knowing exactly where she kept everything. Rumsfeld watched the goings on of the kitchen with a barely mild interest, the dog's only desire to get a few scraps that would fall. Clint sighed after a moment as he began chopping up the vegetables, "Laur, I don't know how we're going to get her into a better place…"

"She needs to talk about Bucky."

Clint's brow furrowed, "Who?"

Laura rolled her eyes, slapping her husband's shoulder and earning an apologetic look from him, "The man in the pictures…you know, the one that's triggered half of this mental spiral?"

"Right…" Clint sighed softly, "If this guy's situation wasn't so bad already I'd kick his ass for putting her through this shit."

The brunette smiled, pecking her husband's stubble-clad cheek and running her hand over his back, "You look at her like she's one of our own kids…"

"Why shouldn't I?" Clint frowned, "You can tell she hasn't had anyone actually looking out for her in so long that she's forgotten what it's like to actually rely on others." When his wife's smile widened he grunted, "What's that look for?"

"You always remind me in little ways why I love you so much and why I married you," She chuckled. "It comforts me to know you'd probably do worse if it was Lila instead of Alice."

"Oh, if Lila was in this situation I'd kill the man," Clint affirmed with narrowed eyes, his knife copying his emotion and earning a wider smile from his wife. "I don't care how sad his story is or how she'd feel for that matter."

"A true hero," Laura laughed as she hugged him from behind, her chin resting on his shoulder as she stood on the tips of her toes to reach the appropriate height. "I know you want to protect her, truly I do, but this is already a weird situation and it's not cut and dry like everything else you like to shoot your arrows at."

Clint grumbled, "I know that's why it's frustrating."

"You're a good man Clint Barton," She hummed, pecking his cheek as he turned to look over his shoulder at her, "and I'd be willing to bet that Alice knows that she can rely on you…as a teammate and as a friend."

Alice stopped in the doorway as she took in her friends, tugging her cable-knit cardigan tighter around herself and smiling softly. She wasn't jealous of them, but she felt an ache in her heart and allowed herself a small moment to picture herself and Bucky in their position. She wondered vaguely if they could have had what Clint and Laura Barton had if he had never fallen from that train in Switzerland in 1945 and allowed herself the small indulgence. She then wondered if she would have told him the truth about herself and her mutation, if he would have wanted children and if he would have minded adopting as an alternative. Alice was selfish in what she wanted and that was what everyone else had: a family of her own and it was the one thing she knew she could never have. Even if Bucky had known about her mutation and her inability to age or die she knew anything they had wouldn't last, the only comfort would come from her knowledge of how to actually die – a thing she was frightened of even with the knowledge that it would allow her to finally rest once and for all.

She was a coward and she was not blind to this small piece of her. Would she have the constitution to truly go through with it in order to rest with the only man that her very soul seemed to crave in the most terrifying and intimate ways? She didn't believe in soul mates – despite mentioning something similar to Steve two years ago in her Boston apartment – and she couldn't afford to she convinced herself, but she wondered in the deepest parts of herself if that is what they were. Even with her first husband her soul never _ached_ for him, of course she had loved him and had been devastated by his death, but loving Bucky was different and she couldn't help but think that this was the universe's cruel way of giving her a second chance – twisted as it was and it formed a pit in her stomach. They were more like star-crossed lovers and she snorted to herself about the irony. She wondered, suddenly, if there was still hope for her and Bucky, after all Laura had told her to believe and fight for that hope…hadn't she?

"Oh there you are!" Alice nearly jumped from her revere and blinked at Laura, the woman smiling apologetically, "I'm sorry…I didn't mean to startle you."

"No," The mutant smiled slightly, "It's okay, I'm okay."

"Well dinner is almost ready, but let me show you what the kids worked on…I'm sure you'll love it!"

Laura took her hand and pulled her into the room, past Clint who offered the two of them a humored smile before the woman pulled her up to the island that had been built in the center of the kitchen where a tray sat covered by a towel. The Barton matriarch pulled the corner of the towel up to show the mutant the assorted cookies that lay beneath all decorated in icing and sprinkles of varying sizes, types and colors. "Oh, Laura…"

"Don't look at me," The woman smiled widely, "the kids insisted."

"God, what would I do without you guys?"

"Be outrageously bored," Clint chirped from the stove and tossing her a smile over his shoulder, "trust me, it's mutually beneficial. You keep my kids busy and so tired they don't complain at bedtime."

"That's true," Alice hummed as she stole a smaller cookie and examining it with a soft smile. They were shortbread cookies, a personal favorite of hers – besides sea salted chocolate chip cookies – and the one she held was decorated to look like an alien of some sort that seemed to be wearing a crown with multicolored sprinkles peppered all over the icing. She popped it into her mouth before Laura could scold her and hummed in appreciation. "They're wonderful."

"I made sure they didn't poison them," Laura giggled as she took one for herself and watching as the mutant traced the tray fondly. "They worked hard at them."

"I can certainly see that...consider my spirits thoroughly lifted."

"Good because as soon as they come in you're not going to have time to breathe," Clint joked as he continued cooking, allowing his wife to take over keeping the mutant's mind occupied. Alice shot him a deadpanned look before jumping when Laura's hand found her own and she smiled to assuage the woman's guilty and apologetic look.

"I love your kids," Alice smiled, her expression fond once more and Laura quirked a trimmed brow, continuing to munch on the cookie in her hand.

"Did you ever want kids, Alice?"

"There was a time I did…more than anything," Alice admitted wistfully, "I'm not…fertile enough…I suppose."

"Oh…oh Alice I didn't mean –"

The mutant smiled waving her hand lightly, "It's alright…believe me, and I'm honestly okay." When Laura didn't look convinced Alice sighed softly, keeping her expression light. "I was married once and we had tried for years, but I never was able to carry to term."

If Laura was surprised to hear this information she didn't show it, but Clint nearly choked on the sip of beer he had taken, "What?!" He coughed after regaining his breath and earning an amused look from both women, "When was this!?"

"Early 1800s," Alice laughed, "he was a sailor."

Laura smirked, "It seems you've got a type, girlfriend."

A blush immediately lit the mutant's face from her cheeks to her ears and she sputtered, earning a loud laugh from the other woman and a groan from Clint, "No I don't…"

"Was your sailor part of the military too or was that just your other soldier?"

"Clint, quick, shoot me with one of your arrows."

Laura laughed loudly, "Oh come on, Alice, when was the last time you had girl talk?"

"Seriously, shoot me." Alice covered her blushing face with her hands and she wished above anything else that the world would open up and swallow her whole in an effort to save her from her embarrassment, but she knew she couldn't say no to Laura Barton. "Okay…okay maybe I have a type…"

She squeaked when the woman wrapped an arm around her shoulders and began steering her out of the kitchen and towards her patio – shooting a look at her husband that all but demanded he finish the meal for that night in her stead. She smirked, grabbing the pitcher of sangria she had made and two glasses as she went. Alice wasn't sure how Laura managed to hold everything and keep such a grip on her at the same time, but didn't question it as she was led to one of her whicker patio chairs. The table was already set and it was clear that Laura expected them to have dinner outside and she couldn't blame her; the weather was perfect to enjoy a meal outside as it wasn't too hot or too cold especially for the early June weather and it wasn't hot enough to be infested with insects.

"So tell me more!"

"Um…about who?"

Laura shot her a deadpanned look, pouring the sangria for the both of them and pushing one glass in front of the mutant, "As much as I'd love to know about your first husband, I want to know about that dashing man in the pictures in your living room!"

A blush lit her cheeks once more and she tried to hide it behind the lip of her wine glass, "Um…are you sure?"

"When have I ever not been serious when I ask you about something?"

"Okay touché," Alice sighed softly. "What do you want to know?"

"How did you two meet?"

The mutant ran her hand through her loose waves, racking the strands back on her head and opening up her face from the shorter pieces meant to frame her face. Laura took the time to examine her from the soft ivory, cable-knit cardigan she wore over a loose black tank and high-waisted boyfriend jeans that were riddled with holes and rips, rolled and cuffed above the ankles exposing an anklet and small tattoo that looked like a small flower and her bare feet. Her eyes then tracing the dusting of freckles that spread across the mutant's nose and cheeks like a blanket on her make-up free face; though Laura knew the small marks would disappear if she actually put foundation on. Alice's eyes were a light hazel almost appearing to look like the sun through a glass of whiskey instead of the cinnamon they had been an hour before. Her hair surprisingly had been left to its own devices and was still damp – left to curl around her shoulders and past her clavicles and framing the silver chain and token it held at the well of her throat. She watched as different emotions played unchecked across her features and it was the most open Laura had ever seen her face and she concluded that when Alice wasn't actively thinking about maintaining a certain appearance she didn't restrain her emotions – it was much different than the almost aloof appearance she seemed to prefer and it was proving to the woman that Alice was much more complicated than she ever realized.

"It's a weird story, actually." Alice decided finally with an almost fond smile. "I was a nurse for the U.S. 71st field hospital and our hospital was assigned to the 101st Army regiment…it was a weird situation that led to me being transferred, but the 107th's field hospital had gotten lost or captured and they were in the direct line of fire…constantly being ordered to push the Axis line back." She described, "They _needed_ a field hospital more than the 101st since our boys were reinforcements and hadn't actually seen much skirmishing along the Italian coast – they were later transferred up through Norway if I remember correctly. Anyway, I saw more cases of Malaria than I did actual casualties. By the time I received my new assignment we had been in Italy for a few months and the 107th was in desperate need of hands. I was a Second-Lieutenant at the time…most nurses were given the rank to afford them some type of respect over the soldiers we were treating."

Laura listened intently, twisting her hair into a knot at the back of her head as she did, "I'm not going to lie; it's almost hilarious hearing a World War II story from a woman that looks younger than me."

"I know," Alice smiled with a laugh before shrugging, "Anyway, before I had received my orders I had built a reputation for using botany and herbalism in place of other drugs we were short on and that followed me to my new regiment. I was given the moniker _Witch Doctor_ within a week of being at the 107th and _Hellcat_ almost a day in and I was reunited with three of the most brilliant women I'd ever known. Because the 107th was seeing so much action resources were limited and I found myself scavenging for plants more often than not in an effort to help supplies last longer until we received new shipments and it was within that first week I was introduced to Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes."

" _Buchanan_?" Laura snorted on a laugh as she sipped at her wine, her mocha eyes dancing in humor and earning a laugh from the mutant across from her, "God, I'm so glad I didn't live during that time period. Who even names their kid like that?"

Alice snickered, "It was a family name, he assured me, but he preferred being called Bucky."

"God _why_!? That's almost worse!"

"If I remember the story correctly, he said it was because as a kid he had bucked teeth and once he hit puberty he grew into them…it became a household nickname to go along with a household middle name…that and apparently James was too formal." She laughed, taking a sip of her wine and allowing the alcohol to relax her, "Anyway, he apparently had never been turned down before because the more he flirted the more I rejected him."

"Oh god," Laura snorted. "That poor man didn't stand a chance."

"No he didn't. At the time my motivations were with the best intentions. My mutation makes it so I don't age and I don't die…makes it difficult to maintain healthy relationships especially during that time period."

"They would've thought you were insane," Laura concluded quickly and earning a hum of agreement from the mutant from around the lip of her glass. "So what happened? Did his flirting finally win you over?"

"God no," The mutant laughed with an unattractive snort, "it was _awful_. One of our first conversation he brazenly told me: _there are three things I want to do before I die and I'd love for you to be one of them_." Alice nearly shot her sangria out of her nose at the expression that had overtaken the Barton matriarch's pretty features, her jaw dropped and her eyes wide as if she was torn between being shocked and laughing, her expression poleaxed. She collected herself after managing to swallow and laughing, "It didn't get much better from there…If we weren't in the middle of a war at the time where we _needed_ every abled bodied man I would've had him court marshalled…it seems silly now, but I was so unimpressed at the time I remember saying a few things decidedly unkind and reminding him that I technically outranked him." She laughed when Laura finally managed to emote, her jaw working as if she was trying to figure out how to word her thoughts.

"He went for _that_ pick up line…out of the thousands out there?"

"Your response was better," Alice admitted with a bright flush, "After that I did everything in my power to ignore his existence and it worked for the most part since he was a Sergeant and was busy on the frontlines commanding a platoon. My friend Johana was the only reason why I even bothered giving him a third try."

"Third?"

"Yeah," Alice giggled, "He tried using the moniker I had been given as an excuse to talk to me, asking if I was offended by it and if I was he would take care of it. He started strong on that approach and then mucked it up again with a statement I realize _now_ wasn't near as offensive as I took it at the time." She sighed softly, her expression fond and Laura studied her expressions, though she wouldn't doubt she wasn't enjoying the story, "He doubted my ability to take care of myself and I pointedly reminded him that I was called the _Witch Doctor_ for a reason. And Johana worked really hard after that to at least get us on friendlier terms – employing the aide of Dum Dum Dugan and Gabe Jones – and it eventually worked."

"Dugan and Jones…as in the Howling Commandos?"

"Yeah, he and Gabe were secret conspirators with Johana and I didn't figure that out until much later," Alice sighed softly with a smile. "The boys all met at basic and had been on the line together much longer than I had been working for the 107th – friends through arms as the story goes. Those men were perhaps the most genuine human beings I had ever met albeit reckless and stupid, but genuine all the same. We became fast friends and it seemed it served nothing if not annoy Bucky beyond reason." She giggled into her glass of wine, "Things changed though…the more I got to know him, the more Bucky surprised me. He was frustratingly charismatic, stupidly funny and had the largest heart I'd ever seen. He constantly put his men first and was so brave, clever…tenacious and he had an unending kindness. It was strange to me…I was two hundred and three when we met and in all of those years I had _never_ met anyone like him. Sure he flirted and of course he was a pain in my ass, but that didn't matter to me…I saw the real Bucky Barnes when he would come to visit the boys under his command that ended up at our hospital or when we would exchange books to keep ourselves occupied since he enjoyed reading nearly as much as I did. It was the times where he didn't know anyone was watching that he was the most endearing." She played with the edge of her coaster as she spoke – her expression fond if a little remorseful and Laura watched her opened features knowing how rare it was for her to express them; her need to hide constantly making it difficult to read her most of the time. "I told Steve not two years ago, when he asked me how it happened that it was like falling asleep…slowly –"

"And then all at once," the woman finished as a smile flickered at the corners of her mouth. "John Green. It's a wonderful quote."

"It was fitting."

Laura smiled, "He sounds sweet…if a little cocky and not unlike a man I know."

"I don't know one man that isn't…military or not," The mutant mused with a smile before she continued after a moment of consideration. "Relationships in the Army weren't necessarily allowed especially within the same regiments and if anyone had told our commanding officers about us we would have been separated on different assignments at best, court marshalled at worst." Alice explained, though her expression showed she was not the least bit sorry. "War ages you faster than anything and from friends we kinda developed this _tête-à-tête_ and it evolved."

"When did you realize you loved him?"

The mutant considered the question and allowed a smile to tug at the corners of her mouth, "Honestly? I think I actually _noticed_ him during our second interaction, but I think I started to fall in love with him the day he found me reading by myself when my leave was cancelled due to inclement weather."

"Bad flirting and all?"

"It was more in the way he carried himself around me," Alice admitted. "I'm short…shorter than most people especially in that time period and he stood a foot taller than me easily. He would always try to make himself smaller around me without compromising his posture…he would match my steps when we walked and never actually undermined my authority if the situation was serious and he always met my eyes when he would talk to me. It was…different and different than any man had ever treated me before. And he was so interested in what I had to say even if he had no idea what I was talking about. Don't get me wrong…my first husband was wonderful to me, but with Bucky it was just…different."

Laura smiled softly at the gentle expression on her friend's face, her eyes briefly flickering to see Clint hovering, but she didn't allow Alice to notice as she seemed lost in revere. "He sounds wonderful, Alice."

"I didn't truly realize I loved him until I heard the 107th had been captured. Our field hospital was located three miles away from the fighting…much closer than regulation permitted since the boys were under constant mortar fire. We had been separated after Colonel Phillips called in for more medical staff so we had field hospital set up at our base camp and four of us were assigned as a triage or checkpoint hospital of sorts. They wanted us closer in an effort to see to wounds faster…try and save more lives. Our hospital came under fire…none of us were ready for it. It happened fast, but suddenly those of us who lived were forced in front of a firing squad and they went down the line, asking us questions that at the time made absolutely no sense to us…then everything happened so fast. One of the doctors, Ulysses Baxter, managed to get free and distracted them long enough for myself and Doctor Hal Collins to escape. We managed to avoid detection for some time, but we were in the opposite direction of our allies. We wound up in the forests of Austria and eventually a small troop caught up to us. He forced me to run and I did." She sighed softly, brows pinching as the memory played before her eyes, "He didn't survive…they killed him and they were coming for me. I remember avoiding them for a day or so before they managed to catch up with me."

"Who were they?"

"HYDRA," Alice frowned, her expression shuddering and Laura blinked at the fast flitter of emotion crossing her features. "They were using our guys in work camps not unlike the internment and concentration camps, and using them as experiments. Thankfully I didn't get to endure that part of the war, since Steve just happened upon the exact truck I was being transported in and we took on the facility – in the loosest terms – together."

Laura offered the woman a sympathetic look, "Is that what the picture of the two of you inside is from?"

"It was from the day we arrived back at the 107th, yes."

"You two look good together," Laura smiled before winking conspiratorially, "I'd know…I have an eye for things like this."

The mutant giggled, taking another sip of sangria as she did, "I've no doubt…You know what's sad about the whole thing though?" When Laura didn't answer she continued – her eyes focused intently on her beverage and her nails clinking a nervous beat against the curve of the glass, "The day of that mission in Switzerland we argued. It's stupid now that I look back on it, but I had been so angry with him because he decided that I couldn't be a part of the mission – which I was assigned to by our superior officer – and he had merely said: _We'll talk about it when I get back_. I had said so many things that night…things not particularly kind, but the very last words I said to him were: _If you walk out that door without me…don't expect me to be here waiting for you to come back._ "

"Oh, Alice…honey you _couldn't_ have known."

She shrugged half-heartedly, "Maybe. The Commandos had done hundreds of other missions and ones much more dangerous, but that one had been so close to the vest for him and I lashed out like an immature brat. His face when I had said that had looked like someone crumpled a piece of paper, opened it and punched a hole through it…and as awful as I felt I did nothing to take those words back. _You don't mean that, Doll,_ he had said, _I know you don't mean that._ I never corrected him and I watched him walk away…he never came back and we never got to talk about it…Steve and my relationship deteriorated quickly and we said things that weren't particularly kind to each other, but for me it was another life I had to watch die out and that I was powerless to stop and I was so, so tired of death and of feeling my heart ripped out. I returned to the front lines in an effort to get away from the SSR, Steve and Bucky's memory." She sighed softly. "And now? _Pft_ , now it's a little more difficult than it would be if it was just the fear of my secret being found out. He's alive and on the run and it _hurts_ , god it hurts so much I want to rip my heart out and just leave it…because I don't know if I'll ever get the chance to apologize to him and maybe I don't deserve to…it would be a small price to pay for being so callous and irresponsible with my words that day…"

The woman reached across the table and grasped her hand tightly in her own, "Do you believe in soul mates, Alice?"

"No." She answered – her seriousness taking her friend by surprise, "I don't…I've never been afforded a chance to believe it. Once upon a time, maybe, but no."

"I think you may have to shift your world view to allow that little piece in there," Laura counseled with a smile, "Because soul mates, true love? That's _really_ rare and I know you probably don't know why things are happening the way they are but maybe this is another chance at what you had."

"I wish I could believe that, Laura, I really, _really_ do…" She sighed softly, watching as the other woman's thumb traced circles on the skin of her hand, "But for once I'd love it if the universe could kindly and politely _fuck off_. My heart can't afford any more…I can tell you right now that if it came to killing him, I wouldn't be able to do it no matter the conditions."

"Well I believe in you two," Laura stated firmly, her groomed brows pinching in her seriousness. "I'd bet anything that you two find each other again and when you do you'll be able to pick back up."

Clint made his presence known as he laid out the dinner for that night and calling his kids to come eat. Alice offered a weak smile to both of them before helping dole out the meal, chewing on the woman's words. If Laura had significant hope for her and Bucky, who was Alice to spit in the face of that belief? Alice offered a wide smile when Cooper and Lila appeared – the two pressing quick kisses to her cheek before settling down and explaining their day loudly and with such enthusiasm Alice couldn't let herself focus on her darker thoughts. They described their time with Ian – the man obviously loving the open affection from the Barton children and enjoying their time and Cooper went on at a great rate about how Dan had let him help feed the horses that evening. Surrounded with this small family, the mutant couldn't help but smile and for the first time in the last week she felt some of the darkness abate.

**-0-**

Later that night, Alice found herself waking from another nightmare and she gasped for air, her chest heaving – the images scattering to the dark corners of her mind before she could rightfully piece them together. She ran a hand over her clammy skin and sighed softly.

"It was just a dream…just a dream Alice…you're safe, you're home and you're with the Bartons…"

Finding herself suddenly fidgety she began untangling herself from her sheets and glancing at her cell phone which proudly showed the time to be 3:07AM and she sighed once again. She assumed her nightmare hadn't been a vocal one as her doorway remained empty and took a moment to thank whatever deity was apparently looking out for her because she didn't know if she could voice her nightmare if she had been asked. Pushing herself to stand she grabbed a large flannel from her papasan chair that had been stuffed in the corner of the room and pulled it over her oversized and faded band tee, the ends of the flannel falling around her bare thighs past her pajama shorts. Wiping her hand down her clammy face once more she ran her fingers through her sweat-soaked hair and tugged it up into a knot at the top of her head before padding out of her room, barely noticing Rumsfeld trailing after her until she heard his paws carrying his weight down the stairs behind her.

"You coming downstairs with me, Bubba?"

The dog seemed to snort as an answer and she smiled softly, patting his head and giving him an extra scratch behind his ear when he stopped next to her.

"Well c'mon then."

She knew she would be unable to go back to sleep and had made her way to her basement lab in an effort to work on generating leads on Bucky – information Sam had sent to her earlier that day and that she hadn't had the heart to look at. He had warned her that – from what he was able to translate so far – it wasn't easy reading. Alice had known that anything regarding HYDRA experimentation wouldn't be pleasant and steeled her nerves as her dog curled around the bottom of her stool, sighing as he settled his weight.

She pulled up the e-file and began an algorithm that would translate the notes and she watched as the Cyrillic alphabet morphed into the Roman alphabet; she tugged her flannel higher onto her shoulder and began scanning through the information. Normally the mutant found standing while she worked to be more comfortable as it would keep her legs from cramping, but she was too exhausted from scattered sleep over the last week to focus on holding herself up and so the stool became a necessary accessory in her small lab. Images accompanied most of the early file in a show of how Zola had documented Bucky's healing process during and post-surgeries – _plural_ she noted with a grimace – as well as notes that had been taken while he had been POW. A frown quickly tugged her lips south as she continued reading. Despite the warning from Sam that it wasn't light reading, she couldn't stop her horror from surfacing as she read about the process of injecting him with small doses of serum and using the machine nearly simultaneously in an effort to wipe his memories and the further she read the more that horror seemed to seize her chest.

He had fought for twenty years before they had been successful.

Alice leaned on her work bench, her chest heaving as she realized how much time he had endured through systematic torture and steady brainwashing before they had successfully changed him from James " _Bucky_ " Barnes into their Winter Soldier. Anger for him clawed for dominance against her horror and grief and she scowled. She compiled the data about his experimentation, his alterations with the super-soldier serum that could have only been developed after Doctor Abraham Erskine's own serum, but there were alterations to the serum that had been routinely given to Bucky. She frowned as she pulled the serum's formula from the document and pushed it to another screen and formulating another algorithm to break down the compounds and components. She wanted to know _exactly_ what the serum had done to him and more importantly _how_ they had managed to get the serum when Steve had told her that traces of the original serum had been destroyed.

While her computer ran traces of the elements she turned her attention back to the file and deciding, despite the late hour, to call Sam. The line rang loudly in the silence of her small lab when she put the phone on speaker and after a few moments in which she was sure the man's voicemail would have picked up a groggy voice answered her with a less than humored snort.

" _Do you realize what time it is, Pidge_?"

"I'm sorry," She murmured genuinely, "but I couldn't wait until morning."

" _It's alright_ ," Sam's voice slurred with sleep, " _what's going on_?"

"I was looking through the file," Alice sighed softly, her brows pinching slightly, "Sam…"

" _I told you it was heavy shit_."

She nodded, knowing he couldn't see it, "Yeah…does Steve know about the alternative serum?"

" _Serum?_ " Clearly not, she thought incredulously, " _Alice I'm still having a hard enough time even translating that file…how did you get **that** far?_"

"I ran a translation algorithm."

Sam sighed deeply – clearly awake now despite the sleep weighted in his voice, " _Why didn't I think about that_?"

"You could've used google, you know." Alice joked awkwardly and earning a few curses for the attempt from the man on the other end of the phone. "Anyway, I haven't gotten much farther than the early stages of him being held by HYDRA and the process of his experimentation."

" _You don't have to sound so clinical about it, Al…I know what this is doing to you._ " Sam sighed softly, his tone kind. " _You said something about a serum he was given?_ "

"I'll send you the translated file…hang on." She quickly uploaded it into a secured attachment and sent the translated file back to the former Pararescuer. "You should have it now."

" _I got it…_ " He said after a few moments and she briefly heard the sound of a coffee pot working in the background and she felt bad for waking him up. " _What page did you find the information?_ "

"It's on the back of page 23 on the margins of one of his diagrams…it's the one for human anatomy that I can only assume was meant to document the changes in Bucky as he progressed through the sessions…I can't really tell if it's meant to show pre-op or post-op, but the information around it is a pretty helpful indicator that they were using him for experiments." She rambled, her eyes finding the image she was speaking of and frowning softly. "Steve had said that Erskine explained to him that he had used the serum one other time and that was on the Red Skull…I can only assume – and it _is_ an assumption at best right now until I can prove otherwise – Zola used the Red Skull's blood to modify a new serum and he compounded the original fall outs to create a new hybrid serum to improve it, if not refine it completely."

" ** _What do you mean_**?"

Alice nearly blanched as Steve's voice came through the receiver and she wasn't sure if Sam had woken him up or if he had already been up when she called. Regardless she frowned and began to explain, "I took the chemical compound and basic diagram of the serum Zola lists in the notes and have it running on a separate program. Granted any information regarding Erskine's serum has been destroyed…"

" ** _They took my blood to try and recreate the serum_** ," Steve sighed and she could tell he hadn't been sleeping perhaps near as much as she managed. " ** _Maybe they got their hands on it_**."

"It's possible…I mean, I can try to run traces to see if anything ever came of it, though I assume that those samples have been destroyed."

" ** _How do you figure_**?"

"Because if they had continued the research into the super-soldier program and that research bore any fruits of success, I doubt S.H.I.E.L.D or the government would have merely stopped at you," She explained. After a tense moment of silence she sighed softly, "I assume that was Peggy Carter's doing…she was the closest to the program and perhaps thought that the world didn't need another super-soldier, but I promise I'll look into it for you."

Steve's voice sighed, " ** _Please_** …"

"Of course," Alice returned with a small smile that she hoped conveyed through the receiver. She then ran a hand over her face and returned to the topic at hand. "Despite that…since there's no documentation of another serum being created after you, Steve, and since Erskine's research had been scratched I don't have anything to compare this other potential serum to. If my assumption is correct and Zola _did_ use Schmidt's blood as a rough outline to attempt a recreation or hybrid, I'd have to try and find a sample of the Red Skull's DNA to compare the markers. If it's consistent with the original serum given to Schmidt by Erskine then I can try to rough out the differences and find out exactly _how_ they altered Bucky."

" ** _So…Buck is like me_**?"

"Hypothetically, yes, in a way," Alice sighed softly, "it would definitely explain how he was able to nearly overpower you…According to what I can make up of Zola's experiments he had to break the injections he had been administering into phases to ensure Bucky's physiology integrating successfully."

" _Meaning that he would have died if he was given it all at once._ "

"Right," She nodded. "It appears as if Zola was literally using trial and error in order to turn Buck into the weapon HYDRA needed and who better than someone who was at peak health? I managed to also uncover that Zola had apparently managed to get a hold of his military evaluations…how I'm not sure, but it had to have been after you went into the ice, Steve…" Silence echoed over the line and Alice couldn't help but frown, "Steve?"

" ** _Operation Paperclip_** ," He finally sighed. " ** _Natasha mentioned it when we discovered the underground bunker in New Jersey…Zola probably stole the file while under S.H.I.E.L.D's employ during their early development and before anyone like Howard, Peggy or Phillips could catch on_**."

"That sounds plausible," Alice murmured as she bit her lip.

" ** _Would my blood help you run your algorithm_**?" The patriot asked after a pregnant pause and the mutant sighed deeply.

"I dunno…maybe? I wouldn't ask you for that though…not unless I've exhausted all other avenues."

" ** _I don't mind, Alice…I want to know what they did too_**."

The mutant ran a hand over her face, "I know…"

It was hard for her to simply forgive the patriot and she knew it was immature and highly unnecessary, but she couldn't help but feel the need to distance herself. Steve seemed to take her distance with about as much grace as could be expected and it was oddly reminiscent of when Bucky had died during the mission in Switzerland all over again. She and the patriot's friendship had suffered then as well because they didn't have Bucky to mediate the raw feelings between them as he had for the year and a half before his death. Hurt slithered through her chest once again and found home in her heart and she tried so hard to not let it take root.

" ** _Have you found anything else_**?"

She pushed her thoughts away once more and sighed softly, "No. I…haven't been putting as much effort into reading further just yet."

" _How're you holding up?_ "

She snorted, "As well as can be expected…trying to get myself back into working order…trying to sleep for more than a few hours at a time…the usual."

There was a lot she wasn't willing to say and she knew Sam had only asked not to necessarily satiate his own curiosity but Steve's. She hadn't really spoken to the patriot, her correspondence done with him via text in an effort to hide how she was truly doing. She spoke to Sam a little more frequently as they worked through potential leads, but since he had been having trouble reading the file he hadn't gotten far at all and her reluctance to sit down and dedicate a lot of time to it hadn't helped either. She and Sam had spoken briefly about her mental health and he encouraged her to take it seriously, his psychology degree taking over intermittently whenever they spoke.

" _Glad to hear it, Pidge…just take your time okay?_ "

" ** _We won't move until you're ready_**."

As much as she appreciated the thought she knew it wasn't at all realistic, "We both know that if we wait for me we'll be waiting a long time, Steve. I'll help as much as I can in the meantime, but I need time."

" ** _Alice…please let me know if I can help_**."

"I will…right now I need to work through it myself." She purposely left out that Clint was helping her get back into working order, but knew that if she mentioned it the patriot would be in the next car and on his way. He was too selfless at times and she knew he was hurting too. "Steve just…promise me – no matter what happens we don't repeat what happened in 1945."

" ** _Can't get much worse than we already are,_** " He chuckled without humor, " ** _But I promise…no matter what happens we do this together this time._** "

The vice that had been holding Alice's heart seemed to loosen slightly and she allowed a small smile to twitch at her lips, "Sounds good…in the meantime I'll try and work my way through the data-dump in order to recover HYDRA's files…if we can get ahead of them by taking out their hideaways then maybe we can finish them once and for all. I know Fury is also doing ground work, but I don't want to leave it all to him."

" _Agreed_ ," Sam seemed to smile through the phone, at ease for the first time during the conversation. " _Now, I'm going back to bed. Get yourself some sleep too alright, Pidge?_ "

"I'll do my best." She nodded before glancing down at her phone. "I'll talk to you both soon."

" ** _And Alice_**..." She blinked at the deep sadness in her friend's voice, her brows pinching together in concern. " ** _I'm sorry…for what I said at the hospital. I was just so scared that_** –"

"I was moving on without either of you?"

" ** _Yeah…I didn't mean to come off like that_**."

She smiled softly, the remainder of the vice holding her heart easing, "I'm sorry too…I shouldn't have let my temper take everything out of context. We still got a lot of work to do and we just promised each other that we're not repeating history and we both know how much I hate making some of these jokes."

Steve laughed, relief coloring his voice, " ** _I'll keep it in mind_**."

"I'm with you until the end of the line, right? That's what you guys always said…" She bit her lip as she wondered if she had overstepped her shaky apology and sighed in relief when Steve's voice laughed once again, his tone soft.

" ** _Yeah…until the end of the line_**."

"I love you…you know that right?"

She didn't know what had created the impulse to say that, but in that moment she needed Steve Rogers – her best friend – to know that no matter how much they disagreed or if they ever fought it wouldn't be something that she would ever purposely try to draw out again. She _did_ love him and with so many things changing for them and so quickly she felt like he needed to understand that she was scared – no _terrified_ , but that she would do whatever it took for them to be happy.

" ** _I love you too, Allie…just take care of yourself and let me know if there's anything I can do_**." Steve seemed to smile, " ** _If we're in this together…then we need to be better about relying on each other_**."

She smiled, "I promise."

" ** _I promise, too_**."

" _As cute as I think your sibling relationship is, can I have my phone back so I can get sleep? You're gonna run me ragged in the morning and I'd like to have some kind of upper hand on you, Cap_."

The two Avengers laughed at the former Pararescuer before Alice smiled into the phone, "I'll talk to you guys soon."

" ** _I'll talk to you tomorrow…our usual time, Alley Cat_**."

" _Bye Pidge_."

The remainder of the conversation was cut off when Sam seemed to take his phone back and as the call option fell away she looked down at the locked screen that seemed to proudly show a picture of her and Steve in her Boston apartment with a puzzle in front of them from two years ago when he had briefly come to live with her. It had been a few days after she had told him the rest of her history and with insistence from Alice they had decided to start taking pictures to document their time together – something the patriot had seemed hesitant to do as he had barely had two pennies to rub together in his youth and didn't understand the portability of phone cameras. She smiled down at the image until the screen turned black before she looked up at the data still processing on the monitor in front of her, her eyes tracing the compounds used to create the serum that Bucky carried and she frowned. She remembered that day in the bank vividly, the man she loved sitting on that chair, surrounded by the Strike team and being forced to comply – despite knowing he could have easily taken them out – but most of all he had been _remembering_.

She recalled his face and an emotion she had mistaken initially as resignation hadn't been at all. No, it had been _defiance_. Bucky Barnes had steadily been battling his way to the forefront of his own mind and pushing the Winter Soldier back – twenty years of fighting so hard against what HYDRA had done to him was surging forth and had nearly broken through.

There had been _something_ there.

Alice moved the images in front of her to the next monitor and dismissing them slightly as she dove into the inter-web. She pulled up theory about brainwashing and psychology reports about prisoners of war, her eyes scanning the information faster than she thought she could and she realized something. If he had been truly remembering her and Steve, then the amount of pain he had to have been in must have been extraordinary and her heart clenched tightly in her chest. She pulled his face back to her memory, despite the pain it caused and forced herself to reexamine that entire event clinically. If he truly had been remembering then he had to have been overwhelmed and not known how to deal with the wide influx of information being presented to him by his own mind. He had known that it was going to be taken away from him and Alice could only wonder how many times this had happened to him before. How many times had he begun to remember before having it violently snatched away from him when it was barely within reach?

During her struggle she hadn't noticed it at the time but he had been _afraid_ , his body reacting before the machine even wiped his memories: chest heaving – _hyperventilating_ , her mind supplied helpfully – and he had known Pierce was lying even without her interjected pleas for him to believe her and to listen to her. His gaze, just before that machine had fallen into place over his handsome features, had said he needed to hold on to the memory – that it was important.

Hope surged in her chest as she thought this over.

She hadn't been with Steve on the helicarrier when he had been fighting Bucky, but if his story was anything to go by and Bucky had been repeating that Steve was merely his mission – it was completely possible that he had been waging war within his own mind with the things HYDRA pumped into him and the man that she loved fighting for dominance. The patriot hadn't told her what he had said, but he had inferred that it had been an old phrase that the two of them had had since they had been kids: _I'm with you 'till the end of the line_. She and Steve had said it to each other no longer than ten minutes ago and she viscerally knew that that phrase had been the final crack in whatever hold HYDRA had on him and had given _Bucky_ the edge to come to the forefront. Steve had made him _doubt_ and it had been enough for him to regain himself and his programming to fall like a house of cards. It was almost as if HYDRA had forgotten that there was a person inside their beautifully carved weapon and Alice allowed a humorless smile to twitch at her lips as she decided that she couldn't wait for him to remind them exactly of what they had failed to make him – the thought while cruel was familiar to her. She had been in a place similar, but depending on the decision he would make she knew that if he didn't take out those responsible, she _would._

If it meant him being able to come back – if it meant him being safe, Alice was willing to risk whatever she had to. She was not shy to death and these people deserved more than the finality that death would grant them, but she would wait and watch – wait and see what _Bucky_ decided. And if he decided to merely expose them – then she would take the olive branch and make sure that those people wouldn't live long enough to hurt another soul.

Alice felt her chest heaving as if she wasn't getting enough air and she allowed herself a few moments to fully collect herself before she looked up at the images that had been in his file, tracing the slopes of a face she had once taken for granted, a smile she would be lucky to see again and the gun-metal blue eyes that would have promised her the very stars in the night sky had she ever asked it of him. She had failed once; she didn't plan to fail a second time. She _would_ find out exactly what they did to him and she would do her absolute best to help him in any way she could.

She wouldn't be helpless this time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** Well...this chapter was long and there was a LOT covered. We got to see angsty-Alice, Clint/Laura fluff (I absolutely adore them y'all and I'm not sorry about that!) and some more background on Alice and Bucky's history! This chapter was a challenge and pleasure to write! The part with Bucky's file was mostly of my own making. I spent WEEKS doing research to see if I could find out what exactly the file said, but couldn't find anything really concrete so I hope you don't mind that I let my imagination run wild ;)
> 
> There's a LOT revealed about Alice in this chapter especially about her fears and what she really, really wants...and honestly, I'm so excited to show you what's coming!
> 
> As always, if you haven't already, please make sure you check out simmerandcry's lovely Steve/Bucky/OC story entitled Show Me, Don't Tell Me! It's an absolute, drool-worthy story centered Post-Snap and it's incredible! If you're looking for a fun ride, it's definitely the story for you!
> 
> Also, I know I've mentioned this in the note but seriously thank you to everyone who has checked out, read, reviewed, favorited and followed this story! I genuinely appreciate each and every bit of recognition this story gets especially since it's helped me through a lot of huge life changes recently while helping me escape my mental dungeon full of health problems for a while! You all are literally the best and I couldn't ask for more awesome a fandom to write for!
> 
> Next chapter: Bucky walks and tries to remember and pick up the shambles that is his mind; flashbacks and more flashbacks!
> 
> Thank you all for reading and I'll see you next chapter~ Stay cool!
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	18. A Soldier's Eyes

_As the Sky May Fall_  
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_  
_Chapter 18_

**Early June  
1 week after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D  
6 Days on the run from HYDRA**

_Longing_.

Dark brows pinched over closed eyes as the word echoed in his mind, sweat beading across his forehead and dampening long strands of dark hair. His muscles twitched violently, the gears in his left arm whirring with the need to be used as if the machine needed to respond with the impulses in his brain with every contraction and spasm. The concrete beneath him left chills shooting up and down his spine as his fevered skin met the cool stone while his nerves felt frayed and like exposed wires, his blood running hot as if liquid mercury replaced it. He turned violently in his sleep, eyes moving frantically beneath his eyelids and wincing at each wave of ice that seemed to pierce his skin. _Longing_ : the word they used to start the Winter Soldier programming and a word they found fitting to use to describe how he had been forced into the life HYDRA had provided for him, how he wished so desperately to return to when times were simpler – when he _wasn't_ the Asset, their Winter Soldier.

 _Rusted_.

A word to describe how they had completely ruined his reputation. They allowed him to be portrayed a hero – children learned how James Buchanan Barnes was Captain America's side kick and was a Howling Commando and so too had he. His memory still failed him, but since visiting the Smithsonian, his mind supplied him with flashes so brief it only served to frustrate him. A whine escaped his lips unbidden in his sleep as he rolled onto his side, his muscles seizing and his fingers twitching. _Rusted_ : he was certain the word meant _tarnished._ If what he had learned at that god-awful museum had been accurate he should be well into his 90s, but the man who had stared back at him from that exhibit had been the same he caught glimpses of in widows and broken glass.

 _Seventeen_.

An old apartment appeared in his vision, near dilapidated, but inviting and warm. An older woman stood in the kitchen with greying mousey brown hair and eyes as blue as an ocean after a storm and ushered two other children to the table, holding a third at her hip, " _Jaime, come it's your birthday! Why don't you ask Steven if he'd like to join us?_ " The memory disappeared as soon as it had appeared, but he knew who she was – or who she was _supposed_ to be. James's mother, if he recalled the exhibit at the Smithsonian correctly – which had meant that the girls in the memory had been his sisters. _Seventeen_ , the year he had been born.

 _Daybreak_.

He turned once more, his chest heaving with each activation word he remembered, his body shuddering and pawing at the shirt he had managed to steal and finding it suddenly constricting. The metal that met his flesh seemed to ache with memory as if recalling surgery, after surgery, after surgery he had underwent before his body took to the cold plates that would replace what remained of flesh and bone and muscle and nerves. Desperately he scratched at it, unsatisfied as his nails were too short to offer any relief and his fingers thwarted by the cotton of the t-shirt and henley he had stolen. _Daybreak_ : a new beginning. It had been something that HYDRA had given him whether he wanted it or not – in fact, he had fought it for nearly twenty years before they had succeeded in his seeming rebirth. Bucky Barnes died in 1945 and again, and again, and again until 1965 where he no longer existed and only the Winter Soldier remained despite his every attempt to keep his mind his own. Stripped away until nothing remained, but a strong sense of following order after order to the letter; if he could not stop himself from following orders, he could prevent the deaths of those not known to HYDRA in hopes that one day they would be taken out and he be freed.

 _Furnace_.

Fire licked at the seam between man and metal and his fingers dug more desperately in an effort to find relief, but none would come as another chill wracked his flushed body. He flipped violently onto his other side, his legs tucking into himself as his right hand clenched at his metal shoulder. _Furnace_ was the easiest word for him to remember, to decipher as it was how his arm was created and it was how he had been told time and time again he would be disposed of should the need ever arise and his usefulness run out. To him it had meant something much different as it served to remind him of his defiance and his yearning for freedom even as the Winter Soldier. How long had it been since his mind was his own? How long had it been since he had been thawed out and put on-mission once again? Despite the uneasy sleep, memories flashed before his eyes again and he was able to picture a young, well-groomed man with bright eyes and a carefree smile – a smile that came easily, he seemed to recall and fire licked at his insides. He wanted to be that man – a man not burdened with pain.

 _Nine_.

He flinched in his uneasy sleep as the symbol of his handlers, the skull with nine tentacles, flashed on top of the other images dancing behind his eyes. He turned his face against the concrete; his brow pinching deeply as another whine echoed passed clenched teeth and parted lips without his consent. Despite being in the uneasy sleep he found no matter how much he tried to awaken he couldn't as he was forced to review each and every image he had seen for the last week since his escape. The wind howled through the broken windows of the warehouse he had commandeered as his shelter for that evening, but otherwise the night was silent. Trapped in his mind, he was forced to relive the same memories. Ones where a man who looked like the man in the Smithsonian laughed, played, kissed, swooned, danced or fought; every smell, touch or taste seemed to linger more potent than the last – names he didn't immediately recognize or places he barely remembered seeing all lining up as if showing him what he was missing and the pieces he so desperately was trying to fit back into the larger picture.

 _Benign_.

A woman flashed before his eyes like a crack of lightening that could illuminate a night sky – her smile warm and her touch gentle. " _As the sky may fall…_ " She whispered, lips parting with a smile as she danced around his mind. He could nearly smell her – a trail of vanilla, clove and touch of cinnamon left in her wake as she disappeared from one flashing memory to the next with warm eyes dancing. She was his most prominent specter. Every time he would nearly catch her, the woman would disappear leaving that ever present smell in her wake. He couldn't picture what she looked like, not completely anyway, only her smile and her eyes framed by dark waving hair that seemed to tickle his cheeks or brush his arm every time he wasn't aware of her in a memory. His handlers had had a sick sense of humor, he decided early on as her image had been used against him numerous times throughout his early containment and training.

" _Do you know who she is, Sergeant Barnes_?" The Swiss doctor would ask, smiling victoriously every time he forgot something about her: what she sounded like, her favorite book or color, her touch, what her _name_ was – it was always about her it seemed. " _She is benign, a balm to the wound and so she shall be a piece to be held over you_." The doctor had laughed. _Benign_ : the word used to describe the woman whose words echoed in his mind for a time, thoughts narrated by her that pushed him to continue fighting. Warmth seemed to settle in his chest and allowed him a brief reprieve from the pain assaulting his body. Any time he recalled her, without his handlers around, she always seemed to bring with her a quiet that allowed his mind a moment of clarity before the horrors would begin anew.

 _Homecoming_.

The one thing he would never have, he learned early on under HYDRA's influence. No matter how many times he had thought to disobey orders or run away, he was always reminded by his handlers that he would never receive the hero's welcome he so rightfully deserved. He would never walk freely in the world no matter how desperately he craved freedom like an animal caged. His body began to shiver once more as a cool breeze swept over his sweat-soaked form, strands of hair sticking to his face as he turned almost as if attempting to bury his face into the stone beneath him, his back bending as his knees bore his weight and his right hand still clenching desperately around the metal plates that made up his left shoulder.

" _Where would you call home, if it couldn't be Brooklyn?_ " A feminine voice asked and again he caught the whiff of vanilla and cloves.

" _I dunno,_ " The man from the Smithsonian replied with a shrug, " _would it be ostentatious of me to say wherever you'd be, Doll?_ "

Full lips tugged into an amused smirk, warm and honeyed eyes arching, " _You're a real charmer, Sarge. If I didn't know any better, and I do, I'd say you were doing more than merely flirting with me._ "

" _That obvious_?" He laughed, eyes closing in his amusement, " _I'd never tell ya what you can and can't do, Nurse…but maybe somewhere where you can see the mountains…always liked 'em despite not bein' able to see 'em in the City. My Ma and Pops always took us upstate to the Catskills just to get that good fresh air!_ "

" _Somewhere with mountains, huh?_ " She inquired, dark hair curtaining her face from his view. " _That settles it. We'll see the Grand Canyon and then we'll go where there are glorious mountains!_ "

" _Together?_ "

" _Together,_ " She replied with a wide smile.

 _One_.

The first of six Winter Soldiers meant to act at a moment's notice and on the whim of their masters.

 _Freight_ _car_.

"NO!"

The roar burst forward with in time with his torso, his arm dropping from his shoulder and bracing his body before his back bent once again and resting his forehead against the cold ground beneath him. His chest heaved as if he had been deprived of oxygen and limbs twitching with the energy to move while his body remained in place. He didn't need to recall the memory of the last word as it always lingered along the edges of his mind. The sound of a train passing by had been enough to break him from the dream and remind him of his fear of the transport. Even while brainwashed and under the influence of HYDRA he had been terrified of trains and he suspected that no amount of erasure would ever get rid of that adrenal response. He could remember each and every time, as the Asset, where he had been forced to use trains as transport and each time had left him with undue anxiety despite remaining stoic and trained like a circus pet. He snarled at the mental comparison he had given himself before running his flesh hand down his face and returning his discarded baseball cap to his head and snatching the jacket he had stolen. It was time to move, despite the late hour and he knew he would not be able to return to sleep.

The clattering of the train along the tracks disappeared and silence encompassed the area once again as he slung a bag of meager supplies back over his shoulder. His mind falling into another memory without his permission.

**-0-**

He had tracked the man known as _Captain America_ – Steve, his mind supplied helpfully – and his two companions to a graveyard where they had met with his first target. He had been surprised to see the man alive and had wondered who these people were that they seemed to escape the wrath and focus of the Winter Soldier. He had begun referring to himself over the last seventy years as the Winter Soldier in an effort to differentiate who and what he was and for the last few days it seemed to work as his former conscious fought to the surface once more. He had watched as the woman with the familiar eyes stepped away from the two men and followed after the first – both clearly injured, but his surprise came when she seemed to walk unsteadily, her gait awkward and nearly boneless. As she passed by his hiding place he lowered the cap further on his head, using the brim to hide his features and the high collar of the jacket to create enough shadow that he would appear to be mourning a loved – an action that wasn't entirely unusual in such a setting. She hadn't paid him any mind and he found himself torn between being thankful and disappointed – though he wasn't sure why.

" _ **Fury**_ ," She called, ignoring the two men who stared after her. The dark skinned man had looked on with a combination of concern and insight, as if he understood her need for privacy with the hooded man while the blonde – Steve, his mind insisted almost desperately – had looked on in something akin to sorrow and confusion. " _ **I wanted to apologize to you**_."

The hooded man and the woman were closer to where he had been hiding and so he could hear and see them much more clearly than he could _Steve_ and the other man, who had begun to speak to one another softly. His first target – _Fury_ , his mind immediately seemed to correct, _you just heard her say his name_.

" _ **What for**_?"

" _ **For thinking the worst of you for so long**_ ," She had answered, " _ **Pierce**_ –" he growled softly at the name, his memory sharp at his most recent handler, "– _**told me that he had made you hunt me down…that you had gotten that assignment from him. After that I knew I couldn't hold you responsible and I wanted to thank you for being the one to put a bullet in his chest**_." She looked away from him, nodding briefly to the Widow – _Natalia_ , his mind easily supplied; she had been his target on the bridge assigned to him by Pierce. He had taken the other agent out easily enough, but the Little Spider was always a difficult woman to pin down, even in the Red Room. She didn't notice anything amiss as she continued walking up to the two men of their team before the dark haired woman returned her gaze to Fury. " _ **I know it couldn't have been easy for you either, considering you had believed him to be a friend.**_ "

" _ **Alexander, if it's one thing I've learned in this business it's to wait until someone shows you their hand. If they're to be trusted, then they'll do so without ulterior motive**_ **.** " The former soldier paused, his brows pinching in confusion. Alexander was the name of the man that was his handler…but the one-eyed man was speaking to the woman. _Last name,_ his mind supplied after a brief moment of thought, _it must be a last name. Connection to the man is formal_. He watched the interaction closely. Was he her superior? _No_ , his mind seemed to whisper the analysis, _their stance is informal – they've worked together before, but aren't friends…_ " _ **You also had a lot to teach me about letting a little trust go a long way**_."

She snorted softly before offering him a small smile, " _ **I suppose there's a lot we can still learn from each other**_."

" _ **Well, like I said – I'm off to Europe tonight. As soon as you need me, you let me know**_."

" _ **Same here, Fury**_ ," She said with an earnest expression, " _ **I want to hunt these bastards down…they've made their intentions clear for what they want with me and if I can make it easier for Bucky to come back to a world that isn't painting targets on people, I'd feel better about it**_."

She was looking for him? His mind immediately flashed to the few days prior and remembered the beaten and battered woman that had shown him nothing but compassion – the woman who, without asking for anything in return, fixed his arm so that he had full mobility. He watched her suddenly much more closely, the determined lines to her soft features and a knowledge that seemed to rival the people around her. She stood awkwardly as if her body couldn't support her form, splotches of yellow and faded brown peppered her unusually blanched skin and around her right arm was a tight wrapping and he wondered what kind of wound it hid considering all of her other ailments seemed to have disappeared if he was remembering her correctly. _What is she_?

Fury frowned, " _ **You know what you're looking to do is near impossible**_."

" _ **Yeah**_ …" She nodded in agreement and the former soldier almost scoffed, not sure if he was meant to be offended or proud that she realized he wouldn't simply be _found_ , "... _**but if there's even a small chance at success I want to take it**_."

His brow pinched. Why was she so desperate to find him? What did she want? Why did she care?

The hooded man offered her a smile, " _ **You know, Alexander. Once upon a time I would have recruited you for S.H.I.E.L.D without any type of motive other than you'd have made an exceptional agent**_."

She looked down and blushed, a small smile flickering at the edges of her mouth, " _ **Funny how life works against what we want, huh**_?"

" _ **Yeah…but my offer stands. Should you need anything you let me know**_."

" _ **Keep your ears out, Fury**_." She advised with a small frown, " _ **If you hear anything about him please don't hesitate to let me know**_."

He knew suddenly that he would need to cover his tracks, but his attention was pulled back to the conversation as the man's voice rumbled once more and he watched the exchange with acute focus.

" _ **I will…and keep your head down if you can, Alexander**_." At the seriousness of Fury's tone the mutant met his eyes, " _ **HYDRA isn't just looking for your man, but they're looking for**_ _ **you**_ _ **…they're gonna be desperate and I'd hate for something else to happen to you that could have been preventable.**_ "

She and the man exchanged a few more words and she had watched as he turned away offering him a small wave before he ducked into his car and disappearing. She had returned to the group and the former soldier made the decision to get just a bit closer to see what the group was discussing and he frowned as Natalia handed _Steve_ a file, his enhanced eyesight immediately catching the Cyrillic letters on the front and in response his muscles tensed.

" _ **That thing you asked for, I called in a few favors from Kiev**_." She was saying and glancing at the spindly brunette briefly as she stepped next to the taller woman, " _ **Will you do me a favor? Call that nurse**_."

" _ **She's not a nurse**_." The blonde man had replied almost instantly earning a look that the former soldier could only explain as being torn between exasperation and longing. Natalia, it seemed, _liked_ the tall blonde, but she buried it deep and pinched her lips before speaking with false enthusiasm.

" _ **And you're not a S.H.I.E.L.D agent**_."

The blonde man offered her a strained smile, almost reluctant and the former soldier interpreted the look as being more resigned. He returned the feelings, but was suppressing them and the look was _almost_ familiar to him. " _ **What was her name again**_?"

" _ **Sharon. She's nice**_." She hesitated for a brief moment before stepping forward and placing a lingering kiss on his cheek before turning from them briefly – he had failed the Widow's test – " _ **Be careful, Steve. You might not want to pull on that thread."**_ She warned him finally before stepping away and looking the smaller woman, " _ **Be careful, Al…**_ "

" _ **You too, Nat**_ ," She offered the woman, " _ **When you get reestablished drop a line, I could use a good workout**_."

" _ **Will do**_."

 _So, the Widow was training her_ , the former soldier frowned as he watched the redhead walk away from the group. As she edged just out of sight, the blonde opened the file and the brunette briefly looked over his arm, glancing at the file and wincing, her eyes screwing shut for a moment before her eyes seemed to skim the words that made up the front document and he wondered if she knew what it said. He didn't know what was in that file, but he didn't plan on sticking around long enough to find out. The woman had promised to let him go and while she had fulfilled that promise, it was clear that she was going to do whatever it took to find him and he didn't feel comfortable with that knowledge. The man she believed him to be was not the same man and he felt fear of disappointment settle into his stomach. She had been kind to him, desperate almost for him to understand what she had been telling him, but it was clear she was someone from his past that was close to him and he realized he didn't want to disappoint her, scoffing almost immediately at the thought. What would someone like her – kind, patient, fearless in the face of the Winter Soldier, and _benign_ – want with a monster like him?

" _ **You're going after him**_."

" _ **You don't have to come with us, Sam**_."

" _ **I know**_ ," The dark skinned man offered a reassuring smile, his dark eyes bouncing from the patriot to the woman in earnest, " _ **When do we start**_?"

" _ **Are you going to be okay to help, Alice**_?"

She turned to look up at the blonde, brows pinching in offense, " _ **I'm not dead, Steve**_." She turned her eyes to the other man, her face aloof and trained stoically, " _ **I'm going back to Virginia tonight. When you get a chance just send me the file and I'll see what I can make of it**_."

" _ **Sure thing, Pidge…you need a ride back or…**_?"

" _ **I'll hitch a ride with Nat**_ ," She answered immediately, her shoulders lined with tension, " _ **thanks though**_."

" _ **Sure**_ ," Sam had replied, his tone conveying his confusion, but knowing enough not to ask, " _ **don't be a stranger and drop a line when you're back**_."

" _ **Will do. See you boys around**_."

 _Alice Alexander_ , he thought over her name after finally learning it the name nearly sounding familiar before shaking his head and disappearing before he could be spotted. He knew better than to stick around and over the last few days he had learned of an exhibit at the Smithsonian that would help him better understand the man who claimed to know him. If what the woman had said was true than she had known him as well and perhaps he could find information about her…he could certainly track her down and find her if necessary.

**-0-**

Bucky shook the memory from his mind, stepping out of the dilapidated structure that had served as his shelter for the last few hours and began making his way south. The woman in the memory and the woman that continued to haunt his memories, _Benign_ he had begun to call her shadow and refusing to call her _Alice_ , seemed to be the same person. His mind puzzled around this for a few moments, recalling the way the woman stood and the way she spoke in the last memory. She seemed tense and on edge albeit resigned and he couldn't figure out why. Focusing his eyes ahead he continued walking, keeping as much of his focus on where he was going and little attention to the images that still seemed to actively be playing around his mind's eye.

His mind over the last week had been unstable at best as his inner conscious seemed to release the dam that held his memories carefully in place, his control slipping periodically and forcing him to be active in avoiding nearly any type of social situation. He was constantly torn between fight and flight, a fear that he didn't understand constantly making him worry about what should happen to him should he be triggered or worse yet: what would happen to those around him. As an asset he didn't understand the fear that he had at hurting others, but he knew that he had always felt this way even after his mind had been turned to malleable clay for HYDRA to mold however they pleased.

He blew a scoff through his nose, hoisting his bag further up his back. The things consistently going through his mind was a war of self as he battled determining who he was on top of what everyone he had met recently expected him to be. Two days past he had decided to go by James to those who decidedly did not know if the Winter Soldier, but he would strive to be Bucky. In his mind he could nearly smell the scent of vanilla and clove, a combination that allowed warmth to flood his chest and spread nearly like a balm to his frayed nerves like a spiced chai on a cold winter's morning. A throaty alto, soft and slow whispered in the breeze comforting words as if pleased by his decision – encouraging him to continue learning.

" _As the sky may fall,_ " Benign would repeat gently as if reminding him to continue forward.

He shook his head, dismissing the ghostly smell and the susurrated alto that seemed to haunt him and he continued to walk as his mind faded back into memory to keep him company.

**-0-**

He watched from the tree line as the small woman, bruised and battered struggled to treat the man he had pulled from the river. " _C'mon Steve don't make this difficult for me…_ " She tugged her shirt from her body, immediately pulling a knife from her belt and ripping the shirt into strips and exposing the array of colors that decorated her body. Deep purple settled into her flesh and robbing it of its usual color as if her skin was had been blanched. Her hair tumbled around her face and curtaining it from view, but now that she had been out of the water and the strands were drying, a halo of frizz seemed to follow her as she checked the man over. Cutting open the front of his uniform she made quick work of appraising the bullet wound he knew rested just off from his stomach and struggling to lift him as she began wrapping the strips of her shirt around the wound, cinching it tightly in place to stem the bleeding.

The woman worked quickly, her movements confident yet her hands trembled. He wondered if it was from adrenaline or fear before watching as she continued to work and what seemed to be moments could have nearly been a half hour before the sound of sirens echoed around the area. The Soldier tensed, concerned if for a brief moment that they were after him, but seeing that the vehicle that pulled up was merely an ambulance he felt his coiled muscles relax. Moments past as the EMTs arrived and helped the woman lift the blonde man onto the stretcher, the woman passing a brief glance around the area before snatching her jacket and tugging it over her exposed skin.

He waited long until they disappeared before allowing himself to relax long enough to consider his next course of action. He frowned as his mind struggled to piece together the last few hours and battling between misperception and self-flagellation as memories continued to flash before his eyes though he didn't allow himself to fixate long on his internal war as a squad car roared up the road and breaking him from his revere. Survival kicked in and the soldier quickly allowed himself to fall back into the mindset of an active warzone; his first and foremost priority was to gather supplies and change clothes. Though the weather was tepid, with the sun falling quickly beyond the horizon he knew it would become a chilly evening and he did not want to spend it in water-logged gear and so began making his way to where he knew an outpost would be – a place he was assigned to go if he couldn't make it back to the bank – that was centered in the middle of the woods. Moving with practiced ease and ignoring the twinging of pain in his right shoulder from where it had been dislocated, he made quick work of dispatching the two men inside and grabbing what appeared to be at one time a military issued Sea Bag, but simply appeared to his eyes as a duffle, and scavenged a spare set of clothes the men had in their own bags – checking the clothing and items and bag itself for tracers. Thankfully, HYDRA had never thought to outfit him with a tracer since he was programmed to return to any outpost or base if a job went sideways or one of his handlers were killed and could not bring them back themselves.

Bucky was simply lucky that his mind was more or less his own at the moment, though still fighting his initial programming. He decided then, after being satisfied at the amount of gear, rations and clothing he could find, that he would destroy the chair that made him into the Winter Soldier and that completely and utterly stole his autonomy. With a plan in mind, he was quick to leave and deciding to save the clothes he had stolen for after he completed his self-appointed mission.

It wasn't difficult for him to make his way back to the bank, his training giving him the ability to disappear and reappear as if a shifting shadow and made much easier due to the looming darkness of the evening. It had taken him a few hours to make it back to the bank, his mind set to appear as if he were still the soldier reporting after his failed mission. The man who greeted him appeared like every other HYDRA thug: crew cut hair, military issued gear and an AK47 and pistol, but he knew better. This man was named Adam Eisenberg and he could feel the surge of annoyance he had for the man. This man like to make play that he was a higher rank than he was and enjoyed sucking up to his superiors by any means necessary. He was going to enjoy crushing his skull between his hands.

"Mission report."

Bucky maintained his blank look, watching as the man shifted back and forth as if he were nervous. He knew the easiest way to ignite the man's temper was to remain silent and so silent he remained. It took a few moments, Bucky having surveyed the number of HYDRA grunts in the area upon entering and counting 6 – a laughable amount when faced with the Winter Soldier, before the man became impatient, a snarl curling at his lips.

"Mission report!"

Once Bucky was certain there were no other grunts that were lingering in the corners he allowed his face to change, watching with grim satisfaction as the man's face changed and before he could bring his gun up to focus on the soldier, Bucky was already moving with graceful ease of a predator. He knocked the automatic rifle out of the man's hands before landing an immediate and solid kick to the man's sternum and easily tossing him across the room before he was moving the next opponent. Instead of merely disarming this man he grabbed him by the arm, snapping the bones beneath his metal hand easily and tossing him into another grunt, watching with satisfaction as they fell to the ground. As the fourth grunt approached he blocked a strike aimed for his chest and spinning the grunt around and removing his pistol from its holster at the grunt's waist before firing three shots into the man's back where he knew his heart would be, spinning he shot the second and third who were still trying to find their feet in the forehead each. He spun once again, pistol whipping the fifth that had begun to approach from behind and blocking the strike of the last grunt with ease, snapping his neck for the man's trouble and firing his gun, resting three more slugs into the fifth grunt easily.

"Wait!"

Bucky turned sharply, nearly allowing a feral smirk to twitch at his lips but resisting the urge as he met Adam's eyes that were wide with fear, his breath heaving with difficulty no doubt he was suffering a collapsed lung and sternum from Bucky's initial strike.

"You…you're supposed to be compliant!"

"Not anymore," His voice was still rough with disuse, but the gravel to his tenor clearly had the other man shaking as he aimed his pistol and laying a slug in between his eyes.

After assessing the area once again and feeling confident that there were no other adversaries in the immediate area he turned, his eyes taking in the metal chair that was meant to wipe his memories – a process that was not without pain that he could at least remember. Rage suddenly burned in him from his gut and seemed to spread like wildfire – unbridled and ceaseless and with a roar he began ripping apart the chair with as much strength as he could muster and continuing to ignore the ache in his right shoulder his determination and adrenaline winning out over his pain. With the chair dismantled and in broken and bent pieces scattered around the concrete floor and his chest heaving he glanced around the area, noticing a stack of other bodies further in and his brows pinching.

He stalked forward and examined the bodies, his mind easily supplying him the information that these bodies had been there much longer and he looked around once more, finding a series of knives laid out in a safe off to the side. He stepped forward, grabbing one of the knives and inspecting them closely a brief memory flashing before his eyes from the bridge – the small woman had cut him with one of these blades so it was clear they had belonged to her.

The knives themselves were well-balanced and well made, if he had to take a guess at the metal used to make the blade he would guess steel, but upon closer inspection he found the metal to be one he encountered every time he woke as it was the same that made up his arm: adamantium, however, his arm was a mix of this metal and titanium alloy. The metal was clean, the blade sharp and showing that she took extreme levels of care with these particular weapons indicating that they were perhaps a favorite of hers, though his eyes were drawn to the engraving near the hilt that had an image of a cat with soft edges making it appear as if the animal was made of fire with the name _Hellcat_ engraved beneath it. The hilt was black, but wrapped with turquoise blue and burnt orange wraps with a white cat's eye opal centered into the hilt. It was a beautiful weapon if a bit ostentatious and he wondered if they were perhaps a gift as they had clearly been made for her. Upon closer inspection he could tell that not only did she take special care of these weapons, but that they were well used and easily broken in as the grip formed easily to his hand. His eyes then glanced over the set noticing that they were all the same and he grabbed the hilt that they seemed to have come in, sliding them carefully into place before tucking the ensemble into the bag of supplies and glancing back around the room. His eyes traced the small cell off to the side and his brow pinched further as he recalled flashes and images of someone being trapped there, but he couldn't fully form the memory and instead decided to glance back through the room once more to make sure he wasn't missing anything else that could potentially be important.

Finding nothing of import he stalked out of the room and just before he did he found, tucked into a corner, a circuit breaker and an idea formed in the back of his mind – one that was familiar from the many jobs where he needed to destroy any and all evidence and make it look like an accident and he quickly set to creating a timed detonation using one of the grunt's cellphones. As the bank exploded behind him, flames licking at the stone he disappeared into the night with only a duffle to his name and knowing that while he was free he was also an enemy of HYDRA and of any other agency that may or may not be for good. He knew that he would have to start picking up the shattered pieces of his mind and memories that lay at his feet like splintered glass.

**-0-**

Hiking the duffle further onto his back, Bucky continued his trek through the vast fields with high grass that he knew shielded him from the highway to his right and the train tracks to his right. Stopping for a moment to consider the memory that had appeared before his vision he removed the single knife he had taken from the collection – the only knife he planned to keep with the need to have _something_ of Benign, the woman's image shifting and scattering almost as if summoned and he grunted in frustration before running his thumb over the bleached cat's eye opal finding it fitting for the woman somehow. Shaking his head he returned the decorated knife to the sheath he had fashioned for it out of one of the sheaths for his own daggers that had been lost during the fight on the helicarrier over the Potomac. The hilt was hidden behind the lip of his jacket – always within reach which brought a comfort to him that he hadn't realized he had needed as it tended to settle his anxiety as he would run his thumb over the gem embedded into the hilt and it served to ground him.

Opening his eyes and narrowing them in a focused stare, renewed energy surging through him and he ignored the memory of vanilla and clove and chai as he continued on his trek through the darkness, his intention to make it to the next state before morning. He walked for a long while undisturbed before another memory seemed to trigger unbidden and he resisted the urge to shove it away, instead allowing it with surprising ease.

**-0-**

After leaving the graveyard behind, finding the information he needed he made his way back into the city of Washington DC, his goal to enter the building known as the Smithsonian. Over the last two days of hiding out and finding that he wasn't exactly being looked for by what remained of S.H.I.E.L.D or HYDRA – at least at the moment – he had found a pamphlet at a local coffee shop for an exhibit about Captain America and his Howling Commandos. Normally he wouldn't have paid any mind to the pamphlet, but the image of a young man in a blue coat that shared his face had drawn his attention and he had easily snatched it – not willing to gamble on if the pamphlet was free or not before disappearing with his meager spoils of a muffin that had been too dry and a coffee so dark it had made him recoil at the taste.

He walked through the museum leisurely, his hands tucked deeply in the pockets of the canvas jacket that he had pulled over a t-shirt and henley in an effort to make sure the metal of his arm would not be seen no matter who looked at it – even a trained eye wouldn't immediately be able to tell his left arm was a completely different make than his right and it brought him a small level of comfort despite his self-consciousness. The museum was not as crowded as it appeared to normally be as he had overheard one of the employees speaking to another museum-goer who had asked why the museum seemed to empty on a weekend, the teen had simply replied that people were more worried about the twisted metal burning in the Potomac than a museum. He had snorted at the comment before quickly making his escape and disappearing into the Flight exhibit, his eyes widening in a child-like wonder as he closely studied each blurb panel and every scrap of information he found along the exhibit and he wondered if at one point he had been interested in airplanes. He hadn't even felt bad when he had swiped a pamphlet from each display that was offered, stuffing it into his pocket for later pondering.

As he made the slow trek through each display and feature, each video or blurb or presentation he soon found himself in front of the Captain America exhibit. It looked obnoxiously patriotic, but he supposed it made sense considering the hero's name was the same as the country he had been on mission in. Like the other exhibits, he took his time reading through each blurb or info panel; he read about Sergeant "Dum Dum" Dugan of Boston, Massachusetts, Private Gabe Jones of Macon, Georgia, Private Jim Morita of Fresno, California, Brigadier James Montgomery Falsworth (though he was certain he had known him to be a Major at the time – an odd piece of information to slither into his mind and he had shook it off as he continued down the informational blurbs dedicated to each man) of Birmingham, England, Jacques Dernier "Frenchie" of the French Resistance from Marseille, France. Each name triggered a series of memories and he took his time sorting through them each before continuing to the next name and picture. He glanced over Howard Stark's information as well as Colonel Chester Phillips as they didn't trigger any information that he had found important. He stopped at the name of the only woman in the immediate area: Agent Margaret Elizabeth "Peggy" Carter and a memory of a curvaceous woman in a red dress surfaced immediately before shifting into a woman who wore trousers and bright red lipstick – a woman with little patience for stupidity and even less patience for patriarchy. He shook his head before stopping at the blurb about Steve, his eyes scanning the information with a hunger he hadn't realized he had as if a man starved of food or water and suddenly being presented both but with a catch.

A frown marred his lips before he stepped passed the image of a frail looking man, watching the image briefly shift into the man he had fought upon the helicarrier and he had to forcibly remove himself from the panel, his hands balling into tight fists in his pockets before he snatched the open pamphlets before stepping before a display that housed the image of the man that bore his face, ignoring the uniformed replicas to the side of it.

His eyes fixated on the man's youthful and carefree features, yet there was a darkness behind the clean-cut man's eyes that gave way to the horror of war and eyes he had become familiar with over the last day or so whenever he managed to catch a look at himself in a passing window or mirror. He studied the man before his eyes briefly traced the blurb next to his image frosted into the glass display and he couldn't help the ball of lead that began to form in the pit of his stomach as horror began to creep into his veins at what he was seeing.

_James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes_

_Born in March 10_ _th_ _, 1917, Barnes grew up the oldest child of four. An excellent athlete who also excelled in the classroom.  
Barnes enlisted in the Army shortly after the attack on Pearl Harbor. After winter training at Camp McCoy,  
Wisconsin, Barnes and the rest of the 107_ _th_ _shipped out to the Italian Front. Captured by Hydra troops later that fall,  
Barnes endured long periods of isolation, deprivation and torture. But his will was strong.  
In an ironic twist of fate, his prison camp was liberated by none other than his childhood  
friend, Steve Rogers, now Captain America._

_Reunited, Barnes and Rogers led Captain America's newly formed unit,  
The Howling Commandos. Barnes' marksmanship was invaluable as Rogers and his team  
destroyed HYDRA bases and disrupted Nazi troop movements throughout the European Theater._

_Bucky Barnes  
_ _~  
1917 – 1945_

He stared at the blurb reading and rereading the information once again. While vague it gave him enough information to start with and it didn't decrease his horror or his pensive stare as he tried to make sense of his situation. After a few moments of deep thought and needing to dodge around a child that had been reading at his side he set his shoulders in determination as his horror turned to anger at what they had done to him. The blurb had said he had endured long periods of isolation, deprivation and torture – how they knew he wasn't sure he was willing to find out and instead turned his eyes to the teleprompter that was built into the wall that held his glass exhibit, the small screen looping through old footage of James Barnes… _him._

 _Him_ with The Howling Commandos. _Him_ with Dum Dum Dugan and Gabe Jones at basic training. _Him_ with Steve _laughing_.

It made his stomach twist painfully and suddenly everything came to a halt as a new image appeared. This image was one he seemed to hold memory of, but only the faintest outlines. The image was of _him_ with _Benign_. The image was taken of the two of them together, sitting together. He wore a torn sweater that looked like it had been through Hell not unlike he did in the picture. Had this been when he had been _rescued_? His leg closest to where she was kneeling was tucked closer to him and his other bent so he could rest his arm on it while the other rested on her knee, his eyes gazing fondly at the brunette seated next to him. The smile on his lips was devil-may-care and teasing but soft as it seemed to overwhelm his battered features. Benign was more kneeling rather than sitting positioned close to his knee almost to the point of touching and wearing a collared shirt that looked dirty and stretched out as it exposed her collarbones and dirt-smudged skin that was tucked into her darker tactical pants, boots climbing up her shins to hold the pants in place. The sleeves were cuffed up to her elbows and showing her own array of scrapes as she tended his injuries. Her dark eyes danced back at the man in a loving gesture, her lips stretched into a cat-like smile that made dimples appear at the corners of her full lips and baring her straight teeth. Her wavy hair was pulled away from her face with wild strands falling around her heart-shaped face and tickling the line of her jaw. Tangled slightly in the delicate chain around her neck that held a familiar circular charm were her own dog tags that had fallen out of the confines of her collared shirt, resting against her breast.

Bucky stared at the image for as long as he could before the prompter switched to the next image that showed her a picture with Jim Morita and showing him the insides of a kit, the white band and red cross on her arm showing she was, in fact, a nurse. He studied her features and he had to nearly visibly shake his head to pull himself away from the images instead forcing himself to continue on through the exhibit, but not before stealing the image of the two of them he had seen off of a nearby gift cart that was tastelessly entitled _Lovers on the Battlefront_ , tucking it into his pocket for later study as it was the only picture he truly had of the woman that seemed to be constantly escaping his mind and that he had named _Benign._

He didn't bother stopping in the small amphitheater, instead continuing passed and into the Army Nursing Corps exhibit where he studied each and every display – continuing to take pamphlets that were offered – before stopping once more as her image, much like his had been, was frosted into a glass display along with the images of three other women. He ignored the other women's displays, his eyes eagerly seeking out her image in the frosted glass. The smooth angles of her jaw and chin, her chestnut shaped hooded eyes and groomed brow with a fringe that covered the ends from view but seemed to fit the expression depicted on her face. She was pictured to have been looking slightly over her shoulder, full lips parted as if she were answering someone and depicted easily was her collared shirt, chains for her dog tags and necklace (that he could see in better detail now that the image was blown up more), apron and cuff that showed she was medical staff. He traced her image as he _tried_ to commit it to memory, though it was less than helpful considering the image had been etched into glass. After gathering as much from the image as he could, his eyes turned to the blurb etched next to her image.

_ Alice Elizabeth "Allie" Alexander  
_ _  
Born November 1_ _st_ _, 1920 Alexander grew up in Boston, Massachusetts and was the middle child of four.  
An excellent student, she graduated top of her class and studied at a local college.  
Alexander enlisted in the Army Nursing Corps in 1942 after Pearl Harbor where she excelled in her program  
being awarded the rank of Second-Lieutenant before her peers and went through basic at Fort Devens, Massachusetts.  
Alexander was assigned to the 71_ _st_ _field hospital and was deployed with the 101_ _st_ _to the Italian Front. She was  
later transferred to the U.S. 107_ _th_ _where she earned the title of the Hellcat of the Western Front and the Witch  
Doctor of the 107_ _th_ _, deploying the use of botany and herbal medicine in place of other supplies._

_It was in this place she met Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, Sergeant Timothy Alloysius Cadwaller Dugan and Private  
Gabriel Jones who would later become Captain America's Howling Commandos. When the 107_ _th_ _was captured by  
HYDRA forces their field hospital came under heavy artillery and mortars, destroying the hospital  
and those in it with the exception of Alexander who was taken hostage. She, along with the rest of the 107_ _th_ _was liberated  
by Captain Steve Rogers._

_With Colonel Phillips's recommendation she was promoted to Captain and earned a Silver Star and Purple Heart.  
Though not formally chosen for the elite squad belonging to Captain America, Alexander was called in  
frequently to address severe medical concerns and aid in the education of Private Jim Morita for  
emergency medicine and use of plants to aid the squad while accomplishing missions. She was  
later transferred in winter 1945 to the 80_ _th_ _field hospital where she treated soldiers and civilians alike  
throughout the European Theaters before returning home after the war._

_Alice Alexander  
_ _~  
1920 – 1963_

His heart sank suddenly.

Was she truly dead as the blurb suggested? He found that he couldn't be sure as he recalled the woman from the cemetery that afternoon and the woman from the shore of the Potomac. She had said he had called her _Alley-cat_ did that mean she preferred to be called _Allie_? He found himself more confused as emotions he couldn't remember experiencing rippled through him like waters before a storm and he found his breathing becoming hitched. Briefly he touched his face to see if it was wet and thankfully finding that it wasn't before he read and reread the blurb much as he had with James's before briefly acknowledging that the overhead PA was announcing the closing of the museum. He grabbed an information pamphlet that detailed what he briefly noticed was entitled _The Iron Ladies of the 107_ _th_.

He quickly slipped out of the service exit he had entered from and disappeared into the night, clutching his spoils tightly in his pocket and among them a picture of Steve Rogers as Captain America and a picture of himself and Benign – Alice Alexander.

**-0-**

**Early June, 2014**  
1 week after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D  
8 Days on the run from HYDRA

Bucky had arrived at a farm that was set further back from the road with two separate barns and a humble sized colonial set further away from the barns. The sign outside of the drive that led down to the house and main barn bore the name _Rocking Horse Ranch and Farm_ burned into the wood with a rocking horse emblem at the bottom of the sign and he frowned slightly before slowly making his way towards the barn. It was evening so he knew he had the cover of darkness that would allow him to sneak easily onto the property, despite this, however, he decided caution wouldn't be remiss and so he moved cautiously. As he neared the barn, with his enhanced vision he noticed the camera that seemed to be set at the front doors and he knew that he would need to get creative upon entry if he planned to hide there after he stashed and stored his bag and finishing his reconnaissance mission.

He easily stashed his belongings in the dark area against the barn where he knew it was outside of the view of the camera before slowly beginning to take stock of any other security in the area. It was well into the night now so he was certain that sneaking through the shadows wouldn't be an issue and he was proven correct as he managed to approach the house, quickly scaling the scaffolding and landing silently on the lip of the covered porch that he realized seemed to wrap around the structure to the back of the house. He tensed when he heard voices approach the front door beneath him and he stilled himself after tucking himself closer to the side of the house just in case whoever was speaking was actually leaving.

"Clint, I swear if you don't get out of here and at least take your wife out on a date I swear I'm gonna scream. I can watch the kids for a few hours…I've got plenty of things to keep them occupied."

His eyebrows raised when he heard the voice that seemed to haunt his waking moments as much as they did in his dreams and memories, his mind immediately placing the voice as belonging to _Benign_ and it was clear she was speaking to the male's voice he had heard briefly muffled before was now clear as the door had opened. He heard the male sigh deeply in reply to the woman's voice.

"Look, you know I'd love to do that…really, but…are you sure you'll be okay?"

The worry in the man's voice had Bucky's brows furrowing deeply in confusion. Was there something wrong with the woman that would make it so she would be unable to take care of herself?

Benign sighed deeply in reply, though her throaty alto was dry in a mocked deadpan. "It's your wedding anniversary, Barton. Laura deserves to get out of this house…you both do. And I promise you I will do no extraneous activities that require immediate adult supervision." There was laughter in her voice now, "I'm gonna try and get your kids into _Lord of the Rings_."

"Jesus Christ why do I put up with you?"

"Because I'm your favorite."

"Nat is my favorite."

"I'm nicer."

The man paused as if considering the statement for a moment before he barked out a laugh. The two of them had moved slightly off of the stoop and were now standing in view, though they both seemed unaware to his presence. The man, Clint, was wearing a t-shirt beneath a flannel shirt, jeans and work boots of some kind but Bucky assumed it was because they were on a farm and he had been doing work around the area. Considering the man knew _Nat_ – his mind easily supplied him the remainder of her name and a strange sense of pride centered in his chest that the woman seemed to have moved on from the Red Room and find potential friends, he supposed – he could only assume that this man was Hawkeye as Benign had used both his first name and last name when addressing him, her tone suggesting she was friendly with the former S.H.I.E.L.D agent and current Avenger. Bucky immediately knew he would have to proceed with his side mission with care, but if he was leaving for a short period of time he may be able to do what he set out to do without much effort.

Benign – _Alice_ , Benign's voice seemed to chastise him – had her multihued locks pulled into a low twisted style that sparked a memory of the way she sometimes appeared in his memories of what he could only assume was the 1940s, curls falling from the array that made it appear as if she had done it out of habit and not cared to how it actually looked. She was wearing an oversized dolphin grey cardigan over what seemed to be a loose black scoop-neck top and skinny jeans fit to her long legs – Bucky suddenly realizing that her torso was much shorter and made her legs appear longer which he found he could appreciate about her slight frame, though she wore a pair of what looked like sandals of some kind, the former soldier never really seeing them before. Her face was bare of makeup, but even still she had a beauty about her that seemed to strike his interest and upon closer inspection with his eyesight he could see the barest traces of demarcations on her skin – freckles aside, though he found them quite cute on her face. Was this the same woman that had treated him a week ago? He couldn't be certain. Pushing his thoughts away for later examination he watched as the man shook his head, hands on his hips though a smile twitched at his lips and showing his amusement with the woman's banter.

"You tell her I agree with you and I swear I'll rat you out."

"You do that I'll tell her you were the one to steal her Oreos the last time you were both here."

"You wouldn't dare!"

"Try me, Barton. I don't have much else to lose at this point." The man's face seemed to fall before she waved her hand flippantly as if to wave away the concern that crested his features suddenly. "I don't mean anything by that, just my pride."

Barton seemed to perk slightly, but Bucky couldn't stop his interest from mounting. What else hadn't she to lose? Did she lose something recently? His mind immediately recalled the memory of her in the cemetery and he immediately wondered if she was referring to him.

"Okay…okay, but where can I even take her out around here? This town is much smaller than the one we live in!"

"Oh it definitely is," Benign hummed her agreement, "that's why I made you a reservation in about an hour at _Violino Ristorante Italiano_. It's a cute place, nice though and much nicer than a flannel and jeans so you'll need to get changed…probably take a shower. It's right in Old Town Winchester, so I asked Dan and Ian to take you there since they don't live far from it."

"You little shit."

"Ah!" She cut off the man's exasperation with a smirk twitching at her lips, "I think you mean _thank you Alice, you sweet baby angel_!"

Clint merely stared at her before his lips quirked into a small smile, "Did you already tell Laura?"

"I may or may not have mentioned that you were very busy helping Dan today in the barn and that you may or may not have asked me to take care of the finer details." She shrugged, "I also may or may not have told her to get dressed nicely since I'm watching the kids since you two have literally been taking more care of me than I've been taking care of myself. Don't think that isn't appreciated…it's why I also may or may not have already left my information with the restaurant so your meal is on me."

"Alice…"

"Happy anniversary, Clint," She smiled, the expression brightening her face. "Now get upstairs. I have your kids to spoil and cookies to get them strung out on sugar with." She shoved the man back towards the house and Bucky listened as the man's footsteps disappeared back into the house and he made sure he wasn't in view of any windows. Once he was certain he was still well hidden, he looked back down at the woman, watching as her arms encircled her small waist and she sighed her expression slightly sad before her expression immediately perked at the sound of lighter steps racing towards the door. Upon listening closer, Bucky was able to discern two individual sets of feet before the door opened once again and two children came into view both yelling her name.

"Aunt Alice is it true mommy and daddy are going out for a while!?"

"Is it true we get to stay up late!?"

"And eat cookies!?"

Benign had opened her arms when both children had come charging out, the little girl with braided pigtails hugging her and looking up at her with wide eyes and smile, the taller boy on the woman's other side and hugging her higher than the girl was and was smiling wide enough to mirror both children. "Yes to the first, yes to the second and yes to the third so long as you both get changed, brush your teeth and say goodnight to both your parents before reporting to the sofa soldiers."

"YES!"

Bucky blinked as both children cried their approval and shouting various versions of gratitude as they raced back into the house and he could briefly hear them racing up on the stairs just beyond the window he was crouched beneath. He watched as the woman smiled fondly before turning once more as a car crunched gravel down the drive and stopped not far from her, where two men stepped out. He would have been concerned had the men been wearing other than the casual clothes they were and he didn't recognize them, but it seemed the woman did as she greeted them warmly and with a small wave.

"Please tell me you told him we were picking them up," The shorter dark-skinned man sighed in exasperation as he approached and pulled her into a brief hug that had the woman tensing briefly, the man immediately releasing her and she flashed him an apologetic smile. "Sorry I forgot…"

"It's alright, Ian…nothing to be sorry for."

"Right," The redhead man frowned as he chewed on the end of an unlit cigarette and immediately removing it when the woman sent him a chastising look. "Anyway, I'll give 'em my number to pick 'em back up when they're done. You don't got any other crazy shit planned for them d'ya?"

Benign smiled, "No…unless they decide to check out the area around the restaurant, but I'm sure if they've got any plans for that Clint will ask you about it. Besides," she shrugged, "I'm pretty sure they're having a band playing down there tonight in Town Center."

"I'm surprised you're not going," The man named Ian stated with an almost dreamy smile. "Being a woman that lived during the height of live jazz bands in the 40s, I thought it'd be the first place you'd check out!"

"I normally would," She agreed and Bucky found his interest piqued slightly as he listened. "But crowds are still a bit much for me and besides, I'm watching the kids and forcing them to watch _Lord of the_ _Rings_ with me."

"Well you need us, you give us a call," The redhead implored before glancing up as Clint and a brunette woman appeared dressed in relatively nice clothes and apparently ready for their date. "You two lovebirds ready?"

"Thanks again for watching the kids, Allie." The tall brunette smiled as she embraced Benign, squeezing her a moment despite the rigid line of her shoulders before Benign seemed to give in and hug the woman back earning a dazzling smile from the other woman for the effort. "We'll try and be back before midnight."

"Okay Cinderella," Benign snickered, "your carriage isn't going to turn back into a pumpkin. Now get out of here so I can terrorize your children."

"If you need us…" Barton frowned as he approached as the woman danced away from the smaller woman and striking up an enthusiastic conversation with the other two men.

"I won't," She assured him before sighing softly. "If I actually need you I'll call, but seriously enjoy your night out. I'll get the kids squared away."

"I know you will…"

"You're worried about me by myself…I get it, but I can handle a few hours. I promise if I need anything I'll call you."

"Okay. I'm serious though, Al. You need me or Laur you call."

"Sir, yes sir."

Barton eyed her for a moment before tugging the woman into a one armed hug that she seemed more comfortable with before releasing her and following the woman and the two men back to the car. Benign waved them off as they disappeared back down the drive before she sighed softly and rubbing her temples. "Okay, Alice, tighten it up. You can do this. It's _Lord of the Rings_ with the kids. You can handle that…just don't fall asleep."

"Auntie Alice?"

She turned and smiled, "You guys all ready to go?"

"Yeah!" The young girl's voice echoed from beneath Bucky's feet. "I told Coop to wait for you so we can divide the cookies between us!"

"Smart girl," She praised with a laugh as she disappeared under the overhang of the porch, "now how do you want to do this?" Her voice and the girl's faded beyond the interior of the house and Bucky frowned slightly. He had hoped that the household would be silent for the most part, but he knew that if he had to he could wait a few more hours before completing his mission. He pulled the image of the _Lovers on the Battlefield_ out of his pocket, the edges slightly frayed from travel and from his constant toying with it, the image creased from where he continuously folded and unfolded it. His mission was simple, truly, he was merely going to investigate some of her belongings to confirm his suspicions. He didn't know if she was the same woman depicted in the image, the same woman from the museum, from the bank, from the banks of the river that had helped him and the woman who had let him go. He adjusted himself so that he was more comfortable as he settled himself in for what was sure to become a long wait.

**-0-**

A few hours passed before he heard the house settle and he dropped from his perch easily enough to check what he assumed was the living room. Peeking through the window he saw the title menu for a movie running. _Lord of the Rings_ , his mind recalled easily from the conversation he had overheard earlier. Glancing at the clock through the window he noticed the time was nearly 12 and he knew if Barton's woman's promise was accurate they would be home soon. He glanced down to see the couch was placed beneath the window and it was absent children or Benign and he had made quick work of sliding into the opened window and disappearing around a corner just as the woman reappeared in the living room, grabbing the discarded plates and cleaning the area of anything that had been used. Bucky then had to turn back to the other side of the wall to avoid the woman seeing him as she stepped passed the wall and into the kitchen. There weren't many lights on, just the lights over the sink and the lamp that sat on the end table next to the couch so there were plenty of shadows for him to tuck into to avoid being seen. The actions came easy as his memory of being the Winter Soldier were much fresher than any of his other memories.

Benign seemed to be washing the dishes that had been used before stepping back into the living room just as he dodged back around the lip of the room and into what appeared to be her dining room. She reached for the remote on her coffee table before turning off the television, her gaze focusing on a frame just off to the side and just as he was about to trace her gaze he felt a nudge at his side and looked down to see perhaps the largest dog he had seen in quite some time, the animal staring up at him with intelligent eyes. Despite he being an intruder to the home, the dog seemed to merely tilt his head at the former soldier, as if sensing something about him that he was aware of within himself. The dog sniffed him briefly before his ear perked and he trotted around the corner and immediately he heard the woman cooing over him.

"Who's a good boy?" The dog seemed to snort in reply which didn't seem to deter the woman's cooing. "You ready for bed? C'mon, let's go upstairs and pretend we're asleep so we can talk to Fury without Clint finding out huh?" The dog didn't reply, but it seemed as if Benign didn't mind either way as she tapped her leg, "C'mon Rumsfeld, let's go."

He listened as the woman closed the opened window over the couch and flicked off the light in the living room casting it into darkness before her steps, light and barely there receded and Bucky would have missed her steps completely if the stairs didn't creak with her weight as well as the clicking of the dog's nails against the hardwood floors and stairs as he followed his owner up to the second floor of the home. After a few moments in which he was certain that no one would be coming in any time soon he stepped into the living room, his eyes focusing on the frame first to find that it was the same image that he carried in his pocket and while it was compelling it didn't mean that she was the same woman from his memories. Replacing the frame on the table with careful consideration of how it had been presented in the first place, Bucky made quick work of checking the first floor before he found a room at the back of the house that seemed to hold numerous items throughout the ages dating back long into America's history and while he was confused by it he ignored these items instead looking for any items that would connect her to the woman that seemed haunt him.

He soon came across a file with her name on the tab and he opened it, his eyes quickly tracing the information there easily enough before he quickly came to realize what the file was. It was her life in chronological order that detailed each part of history she had taken part in along with details about how she forged herself new identities to prevent herself from being tracked through time in an effort to maintain anonymity. The early file didn't pique his interest, but the part about her being born in 1920 and enlisting in the Army Nursing Corps did. Tucked into the pages were personal notes she had made and indicating that there was a notebook she owned, a diary of sorts, which was to be referenced should she need it. He mused that it was terribly irresponsible for her to simply leave information like this around, but considering the times he assumed she had most of this backed up already and if she didn't, she kept physical record to keep hackers out of her business. Just as he was about to replace the file he noticed a period of time that remained blank, the time between 1963 – which he recalled the date her death was listed in the display at the museum – and 1986. There wasn't much listed there, but another notebook seemed to correspond with the information that was missing. Flipping to the front of the file once more he nearly groaned at how simple this seemed to be as there was a brief note of where she had the notebooks that corresponded to certain times detailed in the file.

Setting the file back where he found it and in the way it had been placed, he set to finding the notebooks. Thankfully, it appeared they were in the same room and he discovered both leather-bound books easily enough and flipping to the front of the books he found they matched the corresponding dates that were listed. He tucked both into the pockets of his jacket before leaving the room as he found it before making his way slowly and carefully back down the hallway. He strained his ears to listen to the movements in the home to find it blissfully silent, with the exception of water running upstairs from what he assumed was a shower before making his way back into the living room. He heard voices approaching the front door and ones he recognized as Barton and his woman before he slid back into the kitchen, noticing the back door and finding it to have been left open. While he wanted to see her face just once more before he disappeared he knew he couldn't stay in fear of being caught and so glancing around briefly he found what appeared to be a cloth headband of some sort and taking a moment to smell it he nearly blanched as he was assaulted with vanilla and clove. Tucking that into his pocket as well he quickly slid out of the back door just as the front was opening it and with timing only an assassin was known for, he slid the door closed behind him at the same time the heavy front door clicked shut.

He circled the house and made his way back to where he had left his meager belongings, removing the notebooks from his pockets and tucking them carefully into the bag before pausing briefly to tie the headband around his wrist. Hiking the bag onto his back once more and casting a longing glance at the home that lay just beyond the barn he was still using for cover he disappeared back into the night. Perhaps their paths would cross again, but for now he needed to reclaim himself and learn about the woman from his memories before he even thought of what his next move would be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** Wow-we! This chapter was insane to write! I hope you enjoyed my take on Bucky here...there's a lot going on in this man's mind and while there's a lot of bouncing back and forth I had to write it the same way I thought he would think. It made my real world ADD go haywire, but I'm actually really happy with how this turned out and I hope you did too! It's actually the LONGEST CHAPTER TO DATE AT DAMN NEAR 15K WORDS, lol, I'm sorry but legitimately this chapter was meant to be maybe, maybe 10K at most...oops!
> 
> I'll keep this short as promised in the actual author's note so if you want my whole breakdown definitely scroll back up lol.
> 
> But thank you everyone and I hope to see you next chapter!
> 
> Also, if you haven't already - make sure you check out simmerandcry's story Show Me, Don't Tell me! It's truly a masterful poly OC/Bucky/Steve fic and it's getting really, really intense over there so make sure to go read it!
> 
> Thanks again and please make sure you review and let me know what you all think!
> 
> All of the love, dearies~
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	19. Taking Time

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Captain America: The Winter Soldier_   
_19_

**Early July 2014**

Clint watched as Alice worked through the agility course he had built in her barn. They had been working more and more on the course every day and each time she did the routine she got better and faster at it. Clint had trained a lot of new recruits for S.H.I.E.L.D over his tenure with the organization, though the sudden dismantling left him unemployed and he found that training the mutant filled his time well enough, and she had promise. He was impressed by her progress and found that the repetition was helping her gain traction faster than it had two years ago when he and Natasha had taken a lot of time building her up enough to do even half of the stunts he was forcing onto her training this time around.

The goal for this training was to focus on her much smaller body in comparison to most enemies she would face. Alice was at a disadvantage for many different reasons but the constant fluctuation of her density and mass as well as her deceptively short stature made her awkward despite her knowledge of how to compensate for the constant changes. His goal was to make her seem nondescript and look like less of a threat in order to give her an edge and watching her work through the course, spinning and flipping with the various gymnastics he had taught her as well as parkour he had learned over his years as an agent and his early days in the carnival would certainly give her the edge she needed.

Glancing down at the watch in his hand he was impressed to see that she was doing well on her time, even better than she had this morning. This is how they spent most of the days just before Alice had to take care of the animals and immediately afterwards when her employees would show up for their respective shifts. It had made time pass quickly and Clint was thankful for the distraction. Sometimes the kids would come in to watch their father train their adoptive aunt, and sometimes Laura would show her face with refills of water or lunch depending how long they had been, but mostly it had just been the two of them. In that time Clint had gotten to know the mutant better than he thought he would as she allowed him to see her frustrations when she failed and her joy at her successes; he found himself relating to the mutant and understanding her fears more than he cared to admit as some of them mirrored his own.

"Keep it going, Kit!"

Alice flipped him off as she leapt through another part of the course and he smirked. He had come to calling her _Kit_ shorter for _Kitsune_ (which he had laughed about for a solid two hours after comparing her to a fox after catching her mimicking the animal's sounds to make his kids laugh and insisting on keeping the nickname – which she admittedly liked better than _kid_ ).

The name _Hellcat_ had admittedly stuck within the mainstream media and so her identity was hidden for the most part, Tony's doing in which he took unabashed pride in, while also keeping her obscure enough that she could help the Avengers – something that Clint and Tony had agreed was imperative and much to the billionaire's relief as he had self-appointed himself as the team's representative and had taken much of the responsibility for the team on himself. This included PR, outfitting the team with gear, tech support and liaison to the government – founding the Stark Relief Foundation shortly after the events in New York in an effort to assist in the damages left behind and practically funding the entire rebuild of Midtown personally. It made her worry for him as she saw the guilt that readily plagued the man and she wondered frequently if she could manage to sneak past his AI and help out. She doubted it, but she would certainly look into it later, it wasn't fair for Tony to take on the entire responsibility and become the verbal soundboard for those angry with the group's actions…specifically Senator Stern and a very vocal Secretary Ross.

Clint had been on the farm for a little more than a month and during that time he had been pushing her harder than he and Nat had two years previously in an effort to get her back to where she was and break through the plateau in her fitness and recovery. He had also started teaching her about ways to identify other targets and their weaknesses by using the Avengers team as his models and it had made both of them laugh after Alice had gotten so frustrated that she drew weird amounts of facial hair and other things on the cut outs.

When she dropped next to him he glanced at his stopwatch and smirked at her, walking his way to the board and copying the time there so she could see it herself.

"Damn…I was so close to making that a better jump." Alice panted as she placed her hands on her hips, drawing air deeper into her lungs. "I got stuck on the cables again."

"You're getting better at picking out where your faults are," Clint nodded as he turned back to her with a water bottle in hand and she took it with a grateful smile and a nod. "You're not engaging your core enough to tighten those turns and propel yourself forward. The entire course is dedicated to your core; you let it go for a second you lose time."

"Tell that to my abs," Alice laughed breathily as she leaned back to look up at the course once more. She wore a cropped hoodie with the sleeves taped at her elbows to prevent them from falling down her arms and a pair of three-quarter length leggings, her feet and hands wrapped and taped to give her better stability – her hair pulled back in another messy bun and a scarf wrapped tightly almost like a headband to prevent the strands from flicking sweat into her eyes. She took another gulp of water before breathing through her nose in an attempt to regulate her breathing. "I think I need to build my shoulders up more – while I was cutting the top turns I felt like they were going to give out on me."

"We'll add it into the schedule, but we need to make sure we're keeping variety," Clint advised with a nod, "Your mutation lets you adjust easier, but we don't want to cause any damage and have to rebuild it again."

"True enough," She sighed softly before looking up when she saw a shadow at the door. In the entry way of the barn stood Ian, the man waving awkwardly at the two before stepping in when Alice waved him over.

"Sorry to interrupt, guys," He began with a small smile, "Alice these came in for you and I didn't want to go through them unless they were important."

She smiled and took the mail, glancing at each one and nodding slowly. "Mostly bills. We should be getting a larger shipment of hay in soon and Dorsey sent us the bill early. We normally pay him when he comes in – this one is for feed and you can go ahead with that one since we got that shipment on Tuesday and this one can be invoiced out." She handed each back before tossing the non-important ones on the side and smiling. "Thanks Ian…for everything."

"Well if it was up to me you'd still be in the house taking it easy, but it's clear that this is the way to go."

"Damn right!"

Both glanced at Clint who had stepped off to the side to reset the agility course, making it different so that when Alice went at it again she would have to actively focus on how to get through it. Ian shook his head before looking back at his employer and friend only to jump when she sent him a meaningful stare, "How's everything else?"

"I get the feeling you're not talking about the farm."

"Right you are," She smirked as she took another swig from her water bottle, "So…?"

The man blushed brightly, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh please," She waved her hand flippantly, "I see how you eye Dan, it's not a secret and trust me you'll get absolutely no shit from me about it."

"But…I _work_ with him!"

"So?"

Ian stared at the woman, expression poleaxed, "I am strict about non-employee relationships. That would make me a hypocrite."

"Can I be brutally honest with you?"

"It's never stopped you before," he snorted wryly.

Alice shot him a playful look before sighing, "As one of two leading authorities in this world on waiting too long and not taking chances, don't let it pass you by if you have the power to do something about it. I'm not going to fire you just because you're a gay man, Ian."

"That's a bit much."

"Am I wrong?" Alice inquired, genuinely curious and when he shook his head bashfully she smiled. "I don't just hire people based on their record, their race or what their preferences are and certainly not to merely claim I'm an equal opportunity employer. I hired you because you were the most qualified for the job I needed to fill. It wasn't because you were black and it certainly wasn't because you're gay, it was because you stood out against other candidates because you had what I was looking for and I haven't been wrong about you. And you became my friend afterwards…Dan is a good man and you'd look good together." She offered him a soft look as she took his hands in hers, "No matter what happens outside of the farm, know you both will _always_ have a place here."

The man quickly wiped his eyes before returning his hands to hers and offering her a wide smile, "That's…the best news I've gotten in a long time. I came out a few years ago to my parents and they haven't really spoken to me since – just the occasional phone call, but it's not the same."

"As much as this is my home, Ian, it's yours as well and if anything happens to me where I'm called away on a more permanent basis this place will be left to you and Dan."

"Alice…!"

"It's in your contract," She winked. "Pay attention to the small print next time, yeah?"

The man shook his head and placed his hands on his hips as a bright smile overtook his features and he watched as she sashayed away from him and back to Clint and talking animatedly with him. Ian decided to heed her advice and sighed softly, a smile still in place as he left the barn with a pep in his step that hadn't been there before.

"That was nice what you said to him," The archer nodded as they watched him walk away and Alice watched him with a fond smile on her face.

"It's all true too…he's a good guy and he doesn't deserve half the shit that happens to him just because he can't change who he is and who he loves. That's no way to live and if I can give him comfort and somewhere where he can feel safe, then I know I've done my part."

Clint smiled widely at the shorter woman, throwing his arm around her shoulders and tugging her into his side, ignoring her tensing muscles and ridged stance before feeling her release. He had been pushing her boundaries and touching her whenever he could as a way to desensitize her to the sensation and instead reinforcing a positive response to touch. She had been doing well with her recuperation, but Clint wanted to make sure she was on the mend before he cleared her for any type of missions. He was aware she had been keeping council with someone over the last few weeks and it hadn't escaped his notice that whenever he mentioned it she would shrug and change the subject. He let her have it, but decided to step in if it became a problem.

"You're good to the bone," He teased and smiled wider when she wrapped an arm around his back in a returned one-sided hug, "Who would've thought – the legendary Alice Alexander, daughter of a Colonial Major General during the time of all things nasty and oppressive is such a revolutionary and modern thinker?"

Alice snorted, craning her neck to look up at the man, "You're hilarious, no really…it's a good thing your covers were never for comedy because you'd be forced into early retirement."

Clint threw his head back and laughed as he unwrapped his arm from around the woman's shoulders and allowing her to step away from him. She rolled her eyes at him fondly before scooping the chalk dust from the bowl off to the side of the course and smacking her hands together to get a good coat on her exposed skin.

"Ready for round two?"

"Whenever you are," Alice nodded before bracing herself and getting ready to run the course once more. Clint smiled and made a show of resetting the timer and pressing go and Alice was off like a shot from a gun.

**-0-**

Laura Barton – though a dear friend to the mutant – was terrifying when crossed.

She and Clint had, of course, worked through a meager breakfast of protein bars and through lunch with no intention of stopping and now they had a very mad, very stern matriarch glaring at both of them like they were her own children; her actual children – by the way – were giggling off to the side about how their aunt and father were currently getting the third degree, though were clever enough to not let their mother catch them. Laura Barton's ire was not to be trifled with and her entire family knew that when her rare temper did rear its head, the best you could do to keep your dignity intact was to merely let it play out. As such, Alice couldn't remember the last time she had been read the riot act.

With a stiff finger at both of them she ordered them up the stairs to shower and to get dressed as she was sending them off on an errand. Alice found herself giggling like a child as she and Clint raced up the stairs, humor twisting their dirt-smudged and sweat-soaked features. After running the course a few more times the two had decided a sparring match would be a good way to gauge progress and Clint had been pleasantly surprised that her body was bouncing back so well. As the two continued smothering laughs they shared a conspiratorial look before bouncing into respective rooms to change out of their dirty work out clothes and get cleaned up.

Alice sighed softly as she exited the shower, glancing at herself in the mirror and looking at the woman who stared back at her. Her body had filled back in, though still on the slight side to what she normally looked like, but not unhealthy. Her cheeks were full despite the sharpness to her cheekbones and the slope of her chin where her dimples hid at the corners of her mouth. Her freckles were faded, though she knew time in the sun would change that and make them reappear with a vengeance and she pressed her fingers into her flushed skin – the healthy olive returning easily and she couldn't help the smile that appeared on her lips. She looked stronger than she used to – even with Clint and Natasha's initial training for the two years following the Invasion of New York – and she glanced down to see the still forming muscles. She sighed softly, her eyes tracking the scarred skin at her side and while mostly healed the grotesque twisting of the flesh made her remember the dull ache that seemed to continually throb along it. She shook her head, dispelling the sensation and snapping her attention into getting herself dressed.

She tugged on a cropped light weight sweater, the fabric soft against her skin and the front and back cut into a large V-neck and exposing the thin straps of her sports bra before pulling on a pair of high-waisted skinny jeans that perhaps had seen better days, Alice admitted to herself as she took in the worn fabric and holes at her knees before she tugged on a pair of combat boots. She stepped to the mirror that she had merely rested against the top of her dresser before pulling the damp strands into a messy bun and pulling a few strands free to frame her face and skipping from her room. Clint was waiting in the kitchen where he was apparently trying to get back into his wife's good graces.

Alice smiled fondly, a small quirking of her lips that didn't show her teeth, as she took in the sight. Laura Barton was very rarely actually mad at her husband and especially for small things like missing lunch. She was steadfast and loyal and she was perhaps the strongest woman Alice had ever known – in fact, she and every woman like her that had a man or woman in their lives that was a public servant of some kind. She was the type of woman that understood her husband and his job perhaps better than Alice did and she was his coworker for all intents and purposes and yet still stayed by his side without faltering. She loved the Bartons more and more over the last few years and she adored what they had together.

She was brought from her thoughts when Lila stepped next to her, tugging at her hand and looking up at her, "Auntie Alice, I made you something."

Alice looked down at her and smiled, allowing the child to lead her into the living room where a series of papers were stacked along with crumpled attempts littering the floor around the table. "What do you got for me?"

"I saw these flowers out in Silvy's pasture and reminded me of you!"

The mutant took the drawn picture that was eagerly handed to her with a smile, "Lila, this is beautiful!"

"I'm not as good as Coop…"

Her timid nature wasn't unusual to Alice as she realized early on the youngest Barton was a bit of a perfectionist and looked at her work critically. Though she loved both children equally, she saw most of herself in the youngest of Clint and Laura's children and understood her more introverted personality than her older brother did – for it was Cooper who had started calling her 'Aunt' first and after a few weeks Lila had followed suit. Cooper was extroverted and astoundingly self-assured; though he was patient and kind, but it certainly tended to rub his younger sister wrong some days and those were the days that Alice did not envy her friends.

"You don't have to be as good as anyone," Alice told the young girl as she held the picture close and kneeling in front of the child, "Did you do your best?" When Lila nodded slowly the mutant's smile widened, "Then that's what's important. No one is perfect, but we all do the best we can and sometimes it works out…other times it doesn't, but that should never stop you from always putting in the best effort you can."

"Is that what daddy is doing with you?"

"Yeah…I got hurt really bad and your dad is helping me be better so that I can protect my special people."

Lila's face pinched, "Are we your special people?"

"Of course you are," Alice smiled before she pulled the younger girl to her and earning her a squeal of surprise and a peel of laughter for her effort as the mutant peppered kisses on her cheeks. "You and Coop are my very, very special people."

"You're my special person too," Lila murmured with a blush as she kicked her feet bashfully and Alice smiled softly, her heart swelling with emotion that beat steadily against her chest and she pulled the smaller of the Barton children into a tight hug and earning a small giggle for her effort.

Alice loved children and had always wanted children of her own, but she knew the likelihood of it ever happening was slim at best. The mutant didn't delude herself into considering possibilities that weren't open for her and the selfish part of her knew she couldn't bear if her offspring didn't inherit her X-gene – to watch as that child aged and passed on would kill her. Could she adopt? Certainly, but she wasn't even fully sure that she could be a good mother to anyone let alone a child that would never outlive her. She would never wish her mutation upon her worst enemy as immortality came with a significant price and one that she was sure no one thought of when they sought it out. It had allure to it, certainly, and Alice would be a liar if she didn't see the benefits to effective immortality, but she knew that there were variables no one thought of. She had never wanted to be immortal – or seemingly so – and she had been very accepting of death that night in 1778, but death had been stolen from her and in its place left her with something she couldn't even begin to understand. Becoming reclusive had taught her many things in regards to her mutation and after Seamus, she had forcibly learned others.

Her arms tightened slightly around the child in her arms at the thoughts and she swore she would do anything to ensure that her friends and their children would always be protected – no matter how long she had them in their lifetimes.

"Hey, you ready to go?"

Alice looked up to see both Laura and Clint watching the scene of their youngest clinging to the mutant and the deep lines that had crested her features. Just as soon as he had noticed them they disappeared as she untangled herself from the young Barton and smiling at her before pressing a kiss to her cheek that had the child squealing in exasperation at the show of affection and earning a wider smile from the mutant. Pulling away fully Alice nodded her head to Clint before offering a more sheepish smile to Laura who only shot her a knowing look in reply before herding her daughter out of the living room as the mutant and her husband stepped out into the warm Virginia air.

"You know," Alice broke the silence between them as she glanced at the archer, "I'm actually pretty excited to get away from the farm for a bit."

"I'm sure you are," Clint nodded with a smile. "We're also stopping by the hardware store…the stairs on the back patio could use some work."

The mutant threw her head back and laughed, "A man after my own heart. It's a shame you're married, Barton."

"Oh, don't start that game," The archer laughed good-naturedly and enjoying the slight ribbing from the shorter woman. "Laura will find out and we're both dead meat…the kids will get everything and my office will never get finished."

Alice turned her head to look at him fully, "You _still_ haven't finished that project?"

Clint shrugged his shoulders before offering her a smirk, "Well I got a call from a friend about another friend in need of help and I jumped at it…besides, cleaning up your house is a hell of a lot more fun than working on my own."

Alice shot him an amused look before leaning her head back against the seat, "If you had never been employed with S.H.I.E.L.D…what would you have wanted to do?"

The archer considered the question for a few moments as he drove. The two had loaded into the Chevy pick-up truck that Alice used around the farm to help move equipment to and from different areas as needed. It was old, but sturdy and Alice enjoyed the look of the old truck with chipped paint. It added character, she had argued when Steve had commented that she could easily afford a nicer car – and she had told him that a Volkswagen did not count as a nicer car an argument that would forever rage between the two friends. Granted, Alice had a nicer car – a small black Hyundai – but she only used it when she was traveling longer distances. When she was driving to and from town or around the area she took the truck. After a few minutes of silence in which Clint thought about what he had wanted to do he shrugged.

"Not sure. My brother and I were orphaned young so we ran away and joined a circus before we ever really had time to consider what we'd do if we ever made it far enough to be adults. But I think I'd be a hair stylist or a musician, as much as I love contracting I have a hard time keeping the deadlines."

Alice hummed, "The circus, huh?"

"Where do you think half of your moves are coming from?" Clint smirked, "I spent a lot of time with the trapeze artists and they taught me a lot in regards to being able to move…well them and the contortionists, but I never was able to build flexibility like that." He fell silent once more, hands drumming on the steering wheel when a Led Zeppelin song broke through the speakers. "You're picking up on it fast…it took me years."

The mutant shrugged, leaning her head back into the seat and sighing softly, "I never had formal training, but I knew enough to get my way out of difficult situations. How do you think I avoided Nat so long in Boston?"

"True," The man shrugged with an amused look on his face, "what would you do if you could be anything?"

The mutant shrugged, not taking much time to think about the question, "I dunno…Growing up I was expected to marry into a wealthy family and carry on my husband's legacy. After I died in 1778 I didn't think I could be anything…"

"What about now?"

"Now?" When he nodded she sighed softly, "I don't know…I enjoy being a nurse – I always have. Maybe I'll go back to doing that after some time. I need to let some years stretch still, just to give myself a reasonable excuse to get back into it and forge another resume."

Clint glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, watching as she kept her eyes studiously focused out the front window, her eyes clouding over and her look faraway. It was in this moment that he realized that the mutant beside him was much more complicated than she ever allowed people to see. Shaking his head, the archer smiled over at her knowing she wouldn't see it unless she looked, but hoping to convey the emotion correctly all the same, "Well whatever you do, you know that we're going to be happy for you."

"You all seem so convinced that I should retire," She remarked, turning her gaze to meet his smile once again and she shrugged. "Maybe I should…but I can't…not until I find him."

"In the end it's all up to you," Clint said after a moment and drawing Alice's stare once more at the shift in his tone. Despite the drumming of his hands on the steering wheel to the rock song on the radio, his tone was suddenly very serious and she knew it was rare for the archer to go into full father mode with her. "I don't know who this guy is other than what Cooper's classwork indicates. He's in history books and then we find out that he's the longest running POW…taken and _brainwashed_."

"You're right," Alice sighed softly. "It's not the best running record, but –"

"That's _not_ what I'm saying," The archer interrupted, blue eyes flashing. "I can't blame the guy, Al. I was brainwashed – hell, even Natasha had been brainwashed at one point – regardless, it's like being in the backseat with someone else at the wheel and I know you have some idea as to what that feels like. If your guy's situation was anything like that, I don't necessarily blame him for going into hiding at least until he's sure he can tell the difference between what's in his head and what's actually happening around him. He'd be better adjusted than Cap, but he's still a guy from the 1940s."

Alice felt a weight she hadn't realized she had been carrying lift from her chest and she offered her fellow Avenger a weak, but gratuitous smile. "Thank you…not everyone is going to be as understanding…or _is_ as understanding."

"No they're not," he agreed with a nod. "But the ones who want the best for you will. I know what you get up to in that basement of yours and all I ask is that you're careful. With S.H.I.E.L.D gone you're able to work a little more freely but there are still other organizations out there that won't take kindly to you operating independently."

"Noted…do you have any suggestions?"

Clint's brow furrowed before he nodded, "I'll see what I can dig up, but I think your best bet is to get acquainted with mutants that are like you…you may have an easier time."

"No," Alice shook her head, "any of the mutants that I know are with Xavier and he won't approve of my _independent_ work."

"I'll keep my feelers out…surely there's a mutant not associated with the X-men that would be willing to look the other way."

"You realize you're basically encouraging me to become a vigilante, right?" She said with an incredulous arch of her groomed brow and earning a smirk from the man.

"Maybe…maybe not…so long as long as I've got plausible deniability on my side, you do what you have to." He advised with a secretive smile and watched as the brunette nodded slowly in her understanding, "If our roles were reversed and it was me sitting in your seat…I'd do whatever it took to protect Laur and the kids…even if that meant becoming the bad guy. Besides, Laura was right…I doubt the world is going to be that cruel to you, Kit."

"It already has," She snorted, brushing the strands that escaped her bun from her face as she sighed. "I never thought you were a romantic, Clint."

The man shrugged, "It takes meeting the right person…once that happens it's kinda hard not to believe in it and Laura has proven time and time again that she's with me for however long I'm alive. Seems to be a good trade-out if you ask me."

Silence stretched between the two of them as the country roads disappeared to leave the small and quaint town of Winchester, Virginia. Alice considered Clint's words long after they stepped into the small grocery store that she preferred. The two continued to move around each other with an easy air and she hated to think about when the Barton family would leave her to continue working and healing, but to also give her an opportunity to focus on finding Bucky in her own way. She knew it was nearly selfish to purposely leave both Sam and Steve out of her own search, but she knew that they wouldn't approve of the methods she and Clint had spoken about. Clint had admitted that if he had been in her position he wouldn't hesitate to do whatever he had to do in order to ensure his family's safety and her resolve hardened. Despite knowing she could rely on Fury for information, she also knew that she would have to keep as many people out of her plans as possible. Alice decided in that moment that she would have to go at the entire thing alone and that included not using any of Clint's contacts.

Alice knew she had a lot of work to do and she knew that from here on out things were only going to become more difficult and especially if word ever got back to the other Avengers.

**-0-**

**September 1770  
New York City**

The City had always seemed to be an organism that continuously seemed to grow and it was something that captured and captivated, but it was especially common to see immigrants coming into the port at New York Harbor and it was here Alice stood, her hazel eyes surveying the comings and goings of the colonists. She took special notice to people disembarking from a ship that had just docked and she allowed a small frown to tug her lips southward on the plane of her youthful features when she noticed men in red coats follow shortly after the few new colonists.

The redcoats were arriving on these shores in droves by the day and it had caused unnecessary amounts of tension and all stemming from the recent massacre in Boston that had shaken the very center of the growing colonies. Alice was no fool and her father had declared loudly the night previously at their family's dinner table that as soon as an opportunity presented itself, he would be joining those who believed in a free nation to revolution. Of course, Alice believed the same and when she had told her father as much he had supported her view and the two agreed that perhaps she should appear as a man more often than not in an effort to lead people to believing that her disguise was more of a fact rather than a ghost to be chased off before it could begin to form and despite the protests from her mother, older and younger sister. Her elder brother had merely watched the goings on at the table with a short detachment, his green eyes watching her fondly for she was closest with her elder brother, William Jr. who she affectionately called Will as their father preferred to be called Bill to those closest to him.

Shaking her head she turned her attention back to the people that made up the busy port. Some were conducting business as per usual, some perusing the wares and trying not to balk at the inflated prices and some were a little more nefarious in their intentions – hiding amongst the shadows and eyes lecherous. It was the last that Alice was keeping her eyes on in particular as she made her way through the sea of people, intentionally keeping her head down and allowing the tricorn hat to do its job in keeping her features from being recognizable.

She was born on these shores and yet she had found New York City to be stifling and thrilling in equal measure, but with the thought of revolution ruining the fragile balance she was more terrified than she would ever let on and she worried that her father and brother would become involved in something so much bigger than him despite the wishes of her mother and siblings. Moving with the flow of people, Alice came across her destination and allowed a small smile to grace her features and she quickly entered the tailor's shop. Inside she was unsurprised to find one Hercules Mulligan hemming a pair of trousers and doing so while tapping his foot to an unknown beat.

"You know if I didn't know you to be a tailor's apprentice I would almost be jealous about how seamless your stitch-work is."

The man looked up at her and allowed a wide grin to stretch across his handsome face, clearly unoffended and even humored by her jibe, "Well if it isn't my favorite cross-dresser." With a loud laugh as she slapped his arm halfheartedly, Hercules put down his latest acquisition and turned to look her over, "You look half-starved."

"Well," She shrugged slightly, "what excuse could I possibly offer you to have you drop the subject completely?"

"None that'll suffice this time," He acknowledged with a meaningful look as he passed her a part of his untouched lunch of what appeared to be assorted cheese and a recently cooled honeyed bun. "You eat that and I'll be right back with your stuff."

"Aye, aye!"

She watched as he disappeared behind another door located further to the back of the shop and allowed a gentle smile to tug at the corners of her lips. Hercules had become a fast friend for her, introduced by her father and brother as her father enjoyed the man's tailoring skills nearly as much as he enjoyed his humor and Will had easily befriended the man at the pub and reveled in battles long-past from their heritage. Hercules was an Irish immigrant and her family was Scottish by descent and both he and her brother had spoken fondly of their countries (Alice and her sisters had never been, but the mutant always dreamed of seeing the rolling hills of the Highlands and the castles that her brother and father described so intimately) and spoken ill of the British who had conquered both. It certainly helped that he had flattered her mother and sisters whenever they would stop by and it kept the nature of their rebellious thoughts stemmed for the time being.

The tailor's apprentice had a loud and flamboyant personality and it had drawn the brother-sister duo in like moths to a flame; the three had been unable to separate themselves ever since. He was a tall man, standing easily taller than her five foot that seemed to make him appear as an impenetrable tower, and when he wanted to be, Hercules could be just as imposing. His eyes were like warmed chocolate on a cold winter's day and his voice echoed like his very namesake – a low baritone that rumbled in his chest like thunder and it always reminded her of home in a way that her brother did with his lighter tenor. She adored Hercules as if he was her own blood and she couldn't ever ask for a better friend than the overzealous tailor.

"You know, Al, you really need to eat more." His rumbling and accented voice echoed from the back room as if he was reading her very thoughts from her mind, "I swear you get any more thin, I'm gonna have a hard time hemming your clothes."

She smirked around a mouthful of honeyed sweet bread and called back to him, "You nag me any more Hercules I'm gonna have to start calling you _mother_. It's bad enough she still wants me to be a proper lady." He chuckled good-naturedly at the jab as he reappeared with a bundle of clothes packaged neatly to make it easier for her to carry. He was significantly older than her, the age gap between him and she would put her thirteen years his junior as Hercules was thirty years of age and merely three years her brother's senior. She bit into a piece of cheese as she rolled her eyes, "and I swear between you, Mary, Catherine and Will I'm gonna have a thousand variations of my nickname."

"Well I could call you _Eliza_ , but I doubt you'd want me crooning that namesake at you considering how much Ms. Sarah, Mary and Catherine use it."

"And you'd get a decent sized bruise for your trouble. I hate that name and you know it."

Hercules grinned, "At least _my_ nickname for you is gender neutral so I can call use it whenever I want." He watched as she took another large bite of the bun in her hand, chewing slowly as if thinking of her retort before swallowing and offering him a shrug. "Regardless, I doubt you came to talk semantics…you have any news?" Without looking up from the cube of cheese in between her thumb and pointer fingers she handed him the note and shrugged again.

"You know just as well as I do that the kettle is boiling over at this point and it's only going to get worse," Her alto informed him tartly as she bit into the cube, "My network can only do so much with the little amount of pull it already has."

Hercules regarded her for a moment before plopping heavily on the stool across from her, "You aren't kidding. It's bad enough blood's already been spilled. Have you told your father or Will your intentions yet?"

"That I'd like to go to Boston to expand my super-secret network that they barely know about since I brush it off like all these notes are pen-pals I've made in the last two years – ?"

"Alright, I get the picture," Hercules sighed as he scratched at his scalp, "It isn't a bad idea though…you and Will have been inseparable for as long as I've known your family. Have you seen Tabitha for your lessons recently?"

"I spoke to her this morning…she said she'd have your herbs later this week."

He shot her a knowing look, "It's only a matter of time before someone finds out, Al…you're dabbling in dangerous waters and it's not something I'll be able to help you with. Witchcraft," He snorted, "I never thought I'd see the day were a young woman like yourself would put so much stock into the devil's work."

"It's _not_ witchcraft, Hercules, it's _botany_ … _science_!" She implored meaningfully after she took another bite of the offered cheese, "It's been around for hundreds of years already and don't you dare lecture me about what God would think…he had a garden didn't he?" When the man didn't make to argue her point she sighed tiredly, "besides…with the amount of loyalists around it's been difficult for me to even meet with her. I don't need any added attention and neither does she frankly."

Hercules mulled over her point before sighing, "Look, I'm meeting today with a bunch of guys that are already joining the rebels…I know, if nothing else, we're gonna end up at the Fraunces Tavern in lower Manhattan. It would truly be something if Alexander _happens_ to show up."

"I get it," Alice rolled her eyes. "I'll see what I can do about convincing _him_ to go. You see, he was supposed to be going to see the Bursar today to see if he could acquire an accelerated course…it'd have been a shame to run into Aaron Burr." When Hercules laughed, the young woman frowned. "Mother has been considering us as a potential match for over a year and it's disgusting…" She stuck her tongue out at the tailor's apprentice when he snorted before playing with a piece of cheese on the plate in front of her, "say you're able to introduce _Alex_ to the people you're hoping to…what does that mean for me?"

"Well," the man hummed as he stared unblinkingly at her, "potentially you could go up to Boston and reinforce the network you may or may not be corresponding with on a regular basis. I'm also certain there are a few men up that way who would happily take you under-wing and get you situated."

Alice eyed the man with a growing scowl, "Are you saying that I'd be a bar wench?"

"No!" Hercules cried, his large hands raised in front of him as a defense to the glare she had leveled him with, "No, of course not, Al. I may or may not know a group of men that may or may not be calling themselves the Sons of Liberty. I may or may not also know one of the men who are trying to weave that group's ties into the city _and_ I may or may not know exactly who to point you in the direction of."

"And say these men may or may not exist and operate in Boston…what's to say they'd be willing to take me on? Surely you don't expect me to maintain the looks of a man regularly?"

Another pass at his scalp had Hercules looking up at her from where he bowed his head, "Decision is yours Pip and if you want to reveal your more feminine nature, then I'll leave that to your discretion and in your hands. War's brewing and we're going to need every inch we can get. You've got that _botany_ of yours, which will definitely be helpful, but that network of yours is infallible. Just…think everything over and see if you can get _Alex_ there tonight."

"If I see him, I'll pass on the word…If war is truly our only option then both Will and my father will want me in the safest place. If you can insist that these men are trustworthy and will help then I'm sure they'd be less reluctant of me heading to Boston."

Hercules smiled, "I think I can manage that."

"Thank you Hercules…just stay safe. I know there are more and more red coats demanding your services and if you're going to join up please just keep yourself and the guys safe."

"I will. I can promise you they'll see themselves through with a little bit of help and knowing there's a fiery little cross-dresser who'll beat them senseless if they don't come home." When her brow arched daringly he smiled widely and quickly amended his statement, "Including this man."

"That's all I can ask…Make sure you write…in the code we created."

"I will."

Alice smiled tensely, her tailored clothes tucked underneath her arm and her tricorn hat adjusted appropriately on her head, "I'll see you soon, Herc."

The man nodded politely and she ducked back into the ebb and flow of the streets, keeping her head down and making her way back to her family's home. She and _Alex_ were the same person and she knew that if she didn't make an appearance in her home sooner rather than later then her mother would suspect she was up to nefarious schemes that would go against the very fabric of her womanhood. Alice would rather have Ms. Abagail standing over her and smacking her hand with a ruler than her mother questioning her and she ducked her way along shortcuts she and her older brother had discovered upon their many adventures over the years. She knew that if she allowed her mother to believe she was home, it would make it much easier for her to sneak out once again that evening.

Hercules had been adamant that she make an appearance and she knew it was now or never to make her own mark on history. If for the better she didn't know, but she knew that from here on out, things were going to move much quicker as tensions continued to rise and the seventeen year old knew that she would have to work on convincing her parents to allow her to move to Boston, but she would consider that after she attended this meeting

**-0-**

**Mid-July 2014  
Stark Tower, New York City**

" _Oh, Wonderland_!"

Alice breathed a laugh through her nose from where she leaned over a table in the small lab she was occupying in Stark Tower – though Tony was still in the process of renaming the tower for the Avengers and trying even harder to convince the rest of the team to take up residence there. Alice had become a nearly full-time resident and had left her farm to Ian and Dan for the time being, packing as much of her wardrobe and trinkets as she could (including her pictures from World War II) and Rumsfeld and heading up to New York at the billionaire's request. She had left instructions for the two men to decorate how they saw fit and if they wanted any of her things moved (as she saw herself staying at the tower for the foreseeable future) to let her know and she would have it taken care of. Alice didn't have any specific attachment for many of the belongings that she had left at the farm; the important ones were still in some of the boxes just a few floors above.

Her apartment in the tower was a quaint four bedrooms with large living room and open floorplan that actually looked almost like her Boston apartment and she was even happier to find that Tony had given her a workspace in one of his labs and allowed her full use of Jarvis. The AI had been particularly helpful as she worked through Bucky's file. It had been a quiet project she had been working on with Sam, who had taken up occupancy as her roommate for the foreseeable future – not that she minded the company despite Tony's grumbled complaints whenever the man was around – and Steve had taken the third bedroom because he admitted to not sleeping on the best of nights and Alice forced him to stay with her, her mother-hen instinct kicking into overdrive. She had worked an herbal tea into his nightly routine, one he recognized from the 40s as her own personal recipe, in an effort to help him sleep – she had guilted him into it with relative ease by saying that if he was half asleep when they found Bucky she was leaving him locked in the tower and he had acquiesced without much fight after that. All of this was done while the other Avengers ran point on their super hero business, her stance firm with her staying in the tower to offer backup support whenever necessary with Maria and Jodi, who she had gotten on rather well with now that she wasn't a consistent ball of anxiety. She wasn't quite ready to jump back into the field with the rest of the team and she had her own avenging to do – using the times the Avengers were out to finalize her own contacts and run her own scans on HYDRA bases.

The trick was keeping both Maria and Jodi from learning much about what she was doing and had overridden her clearance through Jarvis so that she would remain at a higher clearance than both women. She had felt bad at first, but the AI didn't seem to take it personally, nor had he alerted Tony to her late night activities so she had pushed her guilt to the back of her mind.

Currently, she was in the process of running a program that would help her locate the next base the Avengers were planning to hit in the coming weeks, her job was merely to hack into their mainframe and run surveillance until Natasha returned from her solo mission in Russia – Alice had managed to weasel out of the woman that she was dismantling what remained of the Red Room and had been monitoring the former-spy from the sidelines, leaving communication open should Natasha need her. While that was processing she had also been running the formula for the serum that Zola had created against the vague and incomplete notes she had managed to find of Erskine's original formula used on Johan Schmidt and it was incredibly slow going since she truly didn't have much to go on in the first place. She was honestly about to cave and ask Steve for a blood sample just to get her answers faster and she knew the patriot had been anxious to the results as well.

Alice's main concern is what the implications could mean for Bucky. From what she gathered of the super-soldier serum based on Steve's own account of Erskine's formula was that it amplified qualities that already existed within the subject. For Steve it had been his strong sense of justice, righteousness and his large heart; for the Red Skull it had been his malice, intellect and overall bad-guy-juju – a scientific take to be certain and had earned her snorts of amusement from both of her current roommates when they had been speaking about it a few nights previously in various positions about their shared living room. Alice knew that Bucky didn't hold any traits similar to the Red Skull, with the exception of the soldier's own intellect which he had proven time and time again during the 40s, but she wondered at what other traits had been highlighted if he was truly given a version of the serum that mirrored Erskine's.

Rumsfeld breathed a _woof_ at her feet as if reminding her that the billionaire was looking for her and just as she managed to straighten her posture just as Tony came dancing into her small lab.

"You know, answering a call wouldn't be completely remiss considering I've given you an apartment, a lab and allowed your dogs to crash."

She quirked a brow at him and smirked, knowing he wasn't only referring to the animal curled at her feet, "Rumsfeld is the bestest boy there is, aren't you bubba?"

The dog didn't move – with the exception of the steady _thump_ of his tail as it beat against the floor in a wag – as he huffed another _woof_ , his large brown eyes staring up at her as if acknowledging the praise but unwilling to lift his head from where it rested between his large paws.

Rumsfeld was a Saint Bernard and Scotch Collie mix and weighed nearly 140lbs (63.5kg) and when she had been looking for a dog she had asked what one seemed to be the hardest to adopt out. Rumsfeld was stubborn and didn't seem to like many people, but Alice had taken a shine to him merely because she could see that he merely needed a home where he could have more freedoms than a small kennel would have allowed him. He was massive and that intimidated a lot of potential adopters, but the mutant had spent all of ten minutes with him before asking for the adoption papers. It had been a long road, but with references like Captain America and Tony Stark her application process hadn't been a complete nightmare. He looked more Scotch Collie than Saint Bernard, but it was impossible to mistake given his size and build; his coat texture very much like his collie side. His name had been _Sergeant_ and it appeared that he hated it nearly as much as she did and she had spent a great amount of time going through names and testing them before it seemed they both settled on _Rumsfeld_.

"Yeah, he's great." Tony shrugged before narrowing his eyes, "What's he doing in the lab?"

"He always hangs out with me in my own lab in Virginia, why wouldn't I bring him with me?" Alice countered with a smirk. "He's well trained and just likes to be included…don't you boy?"

Another soft _woof_ was her answer and she turned a triumphant smile to the dark haired man who merely shot her an exasperated look in return.

"I have a question for you, kinda why I came down here in the first place."

"Sure?"

Tony observed the woman before him for a moment. Alice was dressed in a navy blue oversized crewneck sweatshirt with the sleeves rolled up her forearms and showing the tattoo on her arm and a pair of bicycle shorts and bare feet, her hair having grown out slightly and was pulled into a low bun at the back of her head with an obnoxiously bright orange scrunchie to keep most of it out of her face. She looked the most comfortable he had ever seen her even with the large frames perched on her nose, but the dark circles and sunken cheekbones gave way to the horrors she experienced behind closed doors and perhaps that was why he found her working in the lab at 5am. He was no stranger to anxiety and PTSD and because of it had spent many nights in his own lab tinkering away at a new project, but to see it reflected in the mutant begged his attention. She had briefly mentioned what had occurred in DC as to her involvement, offering to help him douse the PR fire that had sprung up as the Triskelion burned along the Potomac, but he had waved her off telling her to focus on getting better.

The two of them often found themselves sitting at the bar in the penthouse during the early hours of the morning, bouncing new ideas off of each other and explaining what they were working on, but in all of it Tony still hadn't found the strength to ask her how she was doing. But after asking Jarvis what she had been working on and the AI being strangely mysterious, the billionaire had decided it was time to start asking questions.

"You've been a nurse, how long?"

"Broad question if I've ever heard one," She mused mirthfully and shooting the man a smile, her eyes arching behind the large frames perched on her nose. Did she needed glasses normally? No, but the longer she forced herself to stay up – the more she strained her eyes – the glasses helped immensely and she may or may not have dumped them into a coating to cancel out blue light so she could stare at the computer longer than legally should be allowed. "I was treating people unofficially since the 1800s and through a few wars here and there…then got a formal education from Bellevue in 1914, graduated from their accelerated program in 1916 and then served both World War I and World War II…stayed a nurse on and off since, why?"

Tony's brows arched up his forehead before he ran a hand through the dark strands making them stand at strange angles, "Did you ever consider becoming a doctor?"

"No…why?"

Her slow answer brought a poleaxed expression to his face, "Seriously? With how much you know about medicine and with your experience…why wouldn't you?"

Alice threw her head back in a sigh that expressed her exasperation, "Clearly, you've been talking to Clint." She then returned her attention to Tony, removing her glasses and rubbing her eyes, "I never thought to, honestly. I was trying to stay hidden and keep myself off of anyone's radar. Didn't take time to consider an education on top of the one I already had."

"Do you want to?"

"Want to go back to school?" When he nodded she sighed softly, "I don't have time to sit in classes and I wouldn't know the first thing about what I'd want to study."

"How's your knowledge of anatomy and physiology?"

"If I wasn't bragging?" He nodded and she offered him an indulgent smile, "impressive given the utter lack of formal education. They didn't call me _Witch Doctor Alexander_ for shits and giggles…but I don't think that'd be enough."

"Why don't you add an engineering focus on top of it?"

Alice's eyes narrowed, "Where is this coming from?"

The man had the decency to look abashed before he shrugged, "I think it'd be a good distraction for you, honestly. I can tell you're going through shit, it's not hard to because I go through that same shit…pretty easy to tell in others." Alice quirked a brow at him as he continued, "I was also thinking about how having another engineer on the team would be beneficial…considering you hack for us for a living now. Maybe if you want to retire I could use your expertise...hire you on staff as it were"

"It'd be less lonely you mean?"

"Would you think less of me if it was for a selfish need to bounce ideas off of someone who actually gives a flying monkey while in the process?"

Alice's smile was soft, "No, I certainly wouldn't think less of you Tony…as a matter of fact – and don't you dare let this go to your head – I respect you quite a lot. You do a lot for us that doesn't get noticed and I really do appreciate what you do. Do you think me getting actual degrees would help take some of the pressure off of you?"

"I'm not suggesting it to take pressure _off_ of me," Tony frowned openly at her and leaning back on the workbench where Alice had a few unfinished projects. "I'm suggesting it because I think you're wasting the brain you have. You could _literally_ do anything you wanted, but you coast. With how smart you actually are, I'd bet half my fortune you could blast through a doctoral program in less than a year." When she went to comment he raised a finger at her accusingly, "And _no_ I'm not actually making a bet on a sure thing, Wonderland."

"You're incorrigible."

"I do my best," He chirped, "shall we head upstairs for our annual nightcap?"

"Sure…there's some stuff I'd like to pitch to you I can't think of a better way than with some alcohol."

"Oh no," Tony guffawed mockingly, "nothing good ever comes from that."

She nodded sagely, "You're not wrong." She then turned to her dog and patted her bare thigh as she turned the lights off in her lab. "Hence me asking while we drink."

"You're still more fun to drink around than Cap," Tony remarked with a shrug and eyeing the dog as it trotted next to them, "at least you _get_ drunk."

"I think he gets just as frustrated about not being able to get drunk if that makes you feel better."

The billionaire snorted as they stepped into the elevator and taking it to his penthouse, his eyes straying briefly to her dog who sat obediently at her side before sighing in what seemed like reluctant acceptance. While she and Tony weren't nearly as close as she and Steve, Alice had great respect for Tony and they had shared interests. The patriot was smart, no doubt about that, but he didn't get science in the way that Tony or Bruce did, so whenever she would talk about what she was working on she had to go to great lengths to dumb it down for him slightly.

"What year?"

She quirked a brow and he made a sweeping motion with his hand to showcase the bottles of alcohol behind the bar in the penthouse. She snickered before answering, "Auchentoshan 1978."

"Going smooth for tonight?" Tony inquired with a quirked brow, "good news come from whatever you're working on?"

"God no," Alice huffed as she flopped onto the couch, Rumsfeld quickly finding home next to her and flopping his head into her lap. She pet him mindlessly as she leaned her head back, "I'm not getting anywhere on any of it."

"Have anything to do with your metal-armed-assassin?"

She knew that the billionaire was aware of the situation with Bucky in the loosest of terms, mostly because she didn't feel the need to hide it like Steve seemed to want to. The two had argued about it and she had to quickly remind him that Jarvis literally recorded every bit of data on the computers and had them in a file for Tony to access whenever he wanted. She had won her argument quickly afterwards by saying that if they didn't at least let the man know that they were working on it as a side project then he would nose his way into it unapologetically later. Needless to say she had been right and she had shot the patriot a look that clearly said _I-told-you-so_ when Tony had begun asking a hundred questions about DC and S.H.I.E.L.D's collapse. She had given him an abridged version that satisfied the billionaire while also making sure he understood it was personal for both her and Steve. Tony had backed off for the most part, only throwing a few digs at them when he was feeling petulant, but otherwise didn't needle into it too much.

"Unfortunately," She admitted and thanking him briefly for the glass, ignoring when he shot a dirty look at her dog and flopping on the other side of the couch so he could look at her. "When Nat dumped everything for S.H.I.E.L.D and HYDRA I was able to get my hands on some of Zola's notes that I was able to compile to the file that she managed to secure for Steve. He was given some kind of injections that seem to mirror the super-soldier serum given to Steve, but it's hard to tell since Erskine's research literally doesn't exist." She pulled a draft of the scotch and sighed, "Makes my job incredibly hard."

Tony was silent for a long while, sipping at his own glass and frowning at the table set between the large couch. "You think your boy is juiced up on serum?"

"It's possible," She nodded as she ran a hand over Rumsfeld's large head and scratching his ears earning a pleased groan for her efforts, "fighting him was like trying to stop a moving bullet train and felt like it too."

"The amount of couple's therapy you're gonna have to do and you're not even technically together."

Had she been Steve she would have probably taken offense to the comment, but knew it was coming from a place of humor and so offered the man a tired smile, "Nothing alcohol doesn't seem unable to fix just yet, so…"

Tony watched her for another moment before running a hand through his hair – dirty from working on one of his own projects, "Y'know, I'm shit at this stuff, but if you need someone to talk to about…well any of it…you know where to find me. But I'll dig into dad's old files and see if I can't find anything that may or may not help."

"You're a good man, Tony, thank you." She smiled at him, "Don't forget that that's a two way street."

"I'll do my best to remember that."

"Good, now how do you feel about adding software to some of the team's suits…"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** Eehehehehehe, there's a LOT in this chapter and honestly...all of it is filler. I wanted a chapter to kinda show you all where Alice is, how she's doing and what her plans are...how she's dealing with Bucky's situation and what she plans to do with it. With that said, this officially draws an end to the Winter Soldier timeline and for the next few chapters we'll have a little lead up before we enter Age of Ultron...and with it the announcement of my first surprise for this story. Feel free to take guesses as to what you think it is because I CANNOT tell you how pumped I am to be writing this teeny, tiny crossover bit ;)
> 
> HINT: He shows up next chapter and may or may not fall into the mutant spectrum ;)
> 
> Also, if you're trying to find a reference for what Alice's dog, Rumsfeld, may look like - I based him off of Buck - look wise - from the more recent version of the movie Call of the Wild that was released early this year (I think it was January/February) with Harrison Ford. Also, if you look up his breed (being a mix of St. Bernard and Scotch Collie) on google it pops right up, but he looks more Scotch Collie than St. Bernard...if that makes sense. In real life, he's based off of a dog I pet-sat for a long, long time as well as my dog-niece Cocoa, who was hit by a car earlier this week. So, this chapter is a nod at perhaps the sweetest dog I'd ever known and so Rumsfeld was fully realized.
> 
> Anyway, thank you again to everyone who has taken time out to show love to this story be it through favorites, follows or reviews...I truly, truly appreciate each and every one of you as I'm still stuck in quarantine! I hope you all have a wonderful week and if you haven't already I cannot plug simmerandcry's story which includes a ploy-romance between her OC, Avery, and our two favorite WWII veterans. She's weaving an incredible story and you'd be missing out if you didn't already go read it!
> 
> Flow like water, friends!
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	20. Castle

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Deadpool_ **/** **|\** _Age of Ultron_   
_Chapter 20_

**Early January 2015,  
New York City**

Alice glanced at her phone and frowned softly.

She was running later than normal after dropping her car and her dog off at Avengers Tower and playing twenty questions with Tony. She knew that if he really had been that curious as to her errands that day he would have followed her or at least insisted on coming along with her. Alice had been adamant about visiting an old friend and he had thankfully dropped it instead asking questions about her preferred colors and sizes so that he could begin making her a suit much to her chagrin and amusement and she promised to send him measurements and her preferred look with further details to his StarkPad as soon as she finished it. Alice didn't like hiding things from her friends, but she knew she needed help outside of the Avengers for what she had planned and she had finally managed to get the ball in motion.

If she was going to take on HYDRA in an effort to keep both herself and Bucky safe, she knew she would need someone who couldn't easily die and so her search had led her to Wade Wilson.

She recalled Colossus and Logan arguing about him just that morning when she had visited Professor Xavier in regards to her mutation and knew that while he wasn't connected to the X-men, he would be the perfect ally to have and if he was like her and Logan then that was all the better. Through some quick research she found he liked to frequent a bar in the darker parts of the Bronx that was called _Sister Margaret's Home for Wayward Girls_ , though she also knew it to be called the _Hell House_ which she didn't know was supposed to reference some sort of cover that mercenaries in the area used or if it was some kind of inside joke.

Either way, Alice knew that that is where she would find Wade – _Deadpool_ – Logan had scoffed at the name and Colossus merely looked disappointed at the choice as he was the one tasking himself with recruiting the wily mercenary to the X-men. Something he had failed to do in the three years since the mercenary had been discovered to be a mutant. Negasonic Teenage Warhead, or Ellie Phimister as Alice knew her as, and merely shrugged and simply said: _Fuck him, who cares_. Alice had never laughed so hard at such a blasé dismissal before in her life and found she quite enjoyed the teen's presence and she assumed the teen merely tolerated hers.

She shook the look she remembered the Professor shooting her – as if he _knew_ what she had planned and didn't approve – from her mind as she continued to think. She had never been a part of his mutant academy, nor had she ever been a part of his team so she didn't care for his opinions on the matter of her personal life, but she respected when he did impart advice since he really had no reason to. She knew he didn't approve of her methods, but also was aware that so long as her actions didn't trace back to mutants or harm the undeserving he would do nothing to stop her. They had a mutual respect in that area considering she was significantly older than him and had been dealing with mutant affairs much longer than their known existence and she respected him as a leading authority for modern mutants.

Alice shook her head once again as she hailed a taxi, directing the driver to the bar and sitting back. It would have perhaps been cheaper to take the subway or even walk, but she had never felt comfortable in the underground transportation and it tended to trigger her claustrophobia faster than if she was trapped in a taxi and she honestly didn't feel like braving the cold January air in New York City already bundled up in a thick yet stylish trench coat and turtleneck in an effort to keep heat. Alice preferred the cooler weather of fall or spring, but bitter cold was where she drew the line. It was something she had to explain more than once when she and Sam had begun to playfully argue about why their preferred seasons were better than the other while she had been setting up Christmas decorations over the holiday in their shared apartment with Steve.

The three had been effectively living together since the summer and they had settled into an easy routine during that time. Steve had his _own_ apartment in Avengers tower, as a matter of fact, they all did, but the patriot hadn't wanted to stay by himself. Tony had taken special care and thought of each member's preferences before assigning them apartments, which spanned an entire floor of the tower and each had a different layout – again based on preferences – with the only common thing being the small entryway that spanned about ten feet between the apartment door and the elevator to that floor. It was a nice touch that allowed them a bit of privacy and so no one could just take the elevator directly into any of their individual apartments.

The penthouse was a common floor for them all which included the central lab and work area – commonly used by Tony and Bruce – and housed much of the team's equipment as well as the bar and lounge area. It had been set up so that it was merely an area they could lounge together if they deemed fit and have team meetings or, in Tony's case, lavish parties. It was also where the quinjets landing pad was located – once being Tony's personal landing pad that removed and stored his suit. This floor, being the largest, also held most of Tony's personal projects and robotics assembly including the _Iron Legion_ that was still in development that Tony and Bruce were on task to finish in the coming weeks, the billionaire's obsession and desperation for it to work concerning.

The next floor down from the penthouse belonged to Thor. It was mostly set up as a two bedroom apartment that had a launch pad on one single side of the tower that allowed the god to take off and land as he pleased and imprinted with the design left from the Bifrost upon his first visit. The launch pad merely looked like a balcony, but stepped down into the god's living room and was locked by Jarvis and would automatically unlock when the god would land. This floor was also shared by Clint and was set up with a series of sweeping balconies so that the archer could have view of the city – the apartment on the smaller side due to the man hardly ever staying at the tower himself.

The next floor down had been given to Alice. Alice's apartment, unlike Clint's single bedroom, was a four bedroom with three and a half baths with a widely open concept. It had been decorated with a more farmhouse feel that had modern appliances and modern accents – a blend between the two styles that she had taken care to adjust to her own liking. Jute rugs ran through most of the common areas of the apartment including the living room where she had a cream colored sectional set up with light oak fixtures which included the coffee table – which was a large trunk-like piece she had attached wheels to so it could be moved easier – and an entertainment center. She enjoyed interior design and Johanna Gaines was her idol and so there were woven baskets and other knickknacks, taking her male roommates into account with pieces they also enjoyed. Steve and Sam mostly let her do as she liked with the space considering Steve did have his own apartment and Sam was merely crashing with her, but she had insisted they pick things out that they wanted and also encouraged them decorating their own rooms. The fourth room acted as an office and library of sorts – it was what was meant to be the master bedroom, but the three had converted it so that they could fit three different desks and desktops so they could work on whatever they needed to in their own space. Their kitchen was all black cabinets and black marble with sharp silver appliances that Alice fixed with a few backed bar stools that were made with a cane texture and macramé. It was incredibly cozy and always smelled nice because the mutant had an extreme candle addiction as Sam and Steve quickly figured out, though the patriot was aware of it having lived with Alice briefly before. When she had asked Tony _why_ he had given her one of the top floors he insisted it was because he liked her best and so that he could bother her whenever he felt the need since his lab was in the penthouse.

A floor beneath them belonged to Steve, though he was rarely on that floor if at all since he didn't have much and didn't want to brave another trip to IKEA with Natasha and least of all Alice who seemed to enjoy teasing him about that _one time in Washington DC_ , besides, the mutant had a better view of the Manhattan skyline and it made his inner artist sing. Alice had helped him set up his actual apartment, much to his chagrin, to act as an art studio and a place where if any of the team wanted to meet with him privately he could do so without she or Sam accidentally walking into the conversation or overhearing. He was the team's leader and so Tony had thought it best to place him in the middle of everyone so that everyone could easily meet or visit with him. When Alice had told the genius that Steve was currently bunked up with her, he had nearly cursed and asked why he even bothered. The tone was teasing and so Alice didn't think much of it, merely explaining that it was being used as a meeting area and art space which Tony had accepted with a sarcastic smile.

Below Steve's apartment/floor was Tony's abode. His was perhaps the most modern of the apartments and for obvious reasons. He shared this space with Pepper on most occasions since he rarely seemed to occupy his time with Stark Mansion, liking the hustle and bustle of Midtown much more than the outskirts of the city where admittedly he felt disconnected and haunted by the memory of his parents. He had built a landing pad very similar to the one in the penthouse so that he could take off and fly whenever he truly wanted to. Though he had the entire floor to himself, much like Thor, he always seemed to have a room available for Rhodey whenever he popped in for an extended visit. Alice had only met him once or twice and never for prolonged periods of time so she didn't know him well enough to have an opinion, but she found that he at least leveled Tony out which was all she could really ask for until she got to know him.

The next floor down belonged to Natasha and like Clint's it was rarely used, however, since she had exposed herself to the world she had taken up residence within the tower much more frequently. It was closer to the ground and was closer to the stairs so she had easy access to entry and exit points while still remaining secure. Like Tony and Thor, the entire floor belonged to her and had a more traditional layout as far as apartments went with hints of modern tucked in with more antique furnishings. Alice had quite liked the look of Natasha's place and the two women had traded styling tips back and forth, the mutant surprised by how opinionated the Russian was about her space. The redhead also had a small dance studio built into her apartment and one that Alice knew better than to ask about, though she had commented that the floor length windows truly made it feel open – a comment that had the tension in the woman next to her easing slightly. Despite what some may have thought the interior of the apartment was mostly light wood and white countertops to brighten the space with accent walls that Alice had been surprised in the color pallet. Natasha had merely shrugged and said her favorite color was blue and that she preferred pastels.

Below her was Bruce's abode and like almost everyone else he had the floor to himself. Tony clearly had always intended to put Bruce's apartment below everyone else's because the man was uncomfortable with heights and didn't like to feel trapped. It was something Alice learned about the doctor after the incident in DC and after she had come to live at the tower full-time. His concern being in the event that he Hulks out then at least he's closer to the ground and wouldn't feel restrained – something he admitted his other half didn't like and the mutant could sympathize. His floor, like Tony's, was decked out in modern accents and the genius had taken time to install an escape-hatch for the doctor for if he did Hulk-out and needed to jump. It acted as a chute that took him immediately to the ground floor and exited into an open car lot that was monitored by Jarvis in the event someone needed to calm him down. Bullets only served to make the Hulk angry.

Tony had also had a bit of fun at their expense and had placed symbols on the outside of each of their apartments that coincided with either who they were or what Tony thought would be funny. Thor's was his hammer, Mjölnir, Clint's was his bow and arrow, Alice's was the Cheshire Cat from _Alice in Wonderland_ – a play on her hero alias and her name – much to her chagrin, Steve's was his shield, Natasha's was the Widow symbol and Bruce's was a DNA strand, a joke on him being a bioengineer.

During the last few months, Alice had begun working through a duel doctoral program through both NYU and MIT that Tony had been able to pull strings through, happy enough that she had decided to take him up on the offer at all considering she hadn't initially wanted to. She, Sam and Steve continued to work on tracking Bucky, without much luck, with Steve joining the Avengers on more and more missions around the globe – their recent conquest being in Canada where Thor had magically reappeared and demanded to know what was happening and that they needed to find Loki's scepter as it had gone missing after S.H.I.E.L.D's collapse. She had been happy to see the Asgardian once more and he had become obsessed with Rumsfeld, the dog happy enough to follow the large off-world man around the tower whenever he was around and he would speak to the dog as if truly understanding him nearly as much as Rumsfeld seemed to understand everyone around him. It had startled her at first when he had laughed while they were playing and he had spoken to the dog as if they were in a boxing ring insisting that the dog shouldn't speak of peoples mothers in that sort of way.

Thor had once told her about Allspeak, which he was fluent in, and she had assumed it meant any spoken language…clearly it worked for animals as well.

She sighed softly to herself as she glanced out of the window as they turned into the Bronx and she watched the comings and goings of the streets they passed, resolving to walk back despite her earlier reluctance after catching a look at the meter.

After a half hour trip, which Alice knew could have easily been made in less than half that time, she paid her cab and stepped out onto the sidewalk and ignored the large and shady characters that seemed to loiter around the entrance and she stepped past them, making sure her carefully constructed aloof mask was in place. She knew this place was seedy at best and to be careless would be a mistake. She was _Override_ in this world (a play on her mutation – as she seemed to literally override death – as well as her role as a hacker over the last thirty years) and she knew better than anyone that if they managed to trace her back to the Avengers she would have a fight on her hands. Stepping into the establishment she quickly found a seat at the bar and was surprised when the bartender sided up to her quickly.

"What'll it be?"

"If you've got Old Overholt Rye, I'll take it on the rocks…if not Bean works just as well."

"Whiskey…huh, you look more like a vodka soda type."

She knew he was making the judgement based on her outfit and had to withhold her smirk of amusement. She had worn a cream turtleneck that fit her snuggly and beneath her brown trench coat. Black, high-waist skinny jeans were cinched around her slim waist and were cuffed just over her black pleather sock boots with a two-inch heel. The outfit in general wasn't one she would normally wear considering it tended to be slightly impractical, but she felt good in it and decided it was a decent sacrifice especially if it made her seem like less of a threat. It was a style choice she decided was Clint's influence with a little allure peppered in by Natasha to really sweeten the deal, she thought humorously.

Alice's groomed brow arched as she leveled him with a deadpanned look, "And you look like the type of guy that'd prefer daiquiris with the cute umbrellas."

"Point taken," He grumbled before shuffling over to the liquors and pouring her drink, "Wanna start a tab?"

"No, that's okay." She remarked as she slapped cash on the bar including a tip and pushed it closer to him and sipping at the whiskey – she knew better than to have an open tab at a place like this.

A card could give away too much information and she was trying to stay as anonymous as possible. She took in the bar, using the mirror that lined the wall in front of her to keep those at her back in view and watching discretely the comings and goings of patrons and was not blind to the looks she received from her corner of the bar. Despite the bartender's sarcastic and less-than-pleased attitude, he was rather chatty with the people sitting at the bar, including one man that had a face that looked burnt beyond all recognition. Alice didn't pay much attention to him – already knowing him to be Deadpool thanks to Colossus's description – despite the hushed whispers between him and the bartender, their eyes darting her way more than once. After a short while the bartender meandered his way back to her and her brows quirked in amusement. Flirting was clearly the way he was going to approach her odd appearance and she almost laughed.

"So…you don't look like my usuals."

"I suppose not," She remarked dryly as her eyes passed the mirror behind him, a look that did not go unnoticed to the man.

"Looks like you've done this once or twice…"

"Once or twice," She agreed, humming around another drag of her whiskey and shrugging. "Not my first rodeo around these types of places."

The bartender snorted, "Yeah, we don't get pretty women in places like this. Not enough music or whatever."

"I'm not here for music," She remarked with a smirk against the lip of her glass, "in fact, I'm looking for someone."

She ignored when he threw his head back and muttered a: _Am I only good enough for information_ at the ceiling before returning his eyes back to her, the cool brown glinting behind the lenses of his glasses. "And who're you looking for? Justin Bieber?"

"You could say that," Alice remarked with humor and matching his exasperation with a dry lilt. "I'm looking for Wade Wilson."

"The fuck why?"

Her eyebrow arched and she smirked, reaching into her jacket and producing a card, "Here I thought you were a good sport…make sure he gets that. I'm sure he's here and there and I'm not exactly ignorant that you and he are close – maybe next time, try covering your annoyance and concern with disinterest, Weasel."

"How the fuck…?"

"Look at the card and make sure Wade gets it."

She shot the rest of her whiskey and smirked once again before tucking her hands into her jacket and beginning to meander away. She had been surveying the bar consistently since she had stepped inside and knew she wouldn't just be able to walk out the front door near as easy as it had been to walk in. Alice was proven correct when a large and lumbering man with a clean shaven face stopped her, his hand encircling her bicep and bringing her to a short stop. She raised her brows as she glanced from his hand to his face with complete disinterest.

"Hey wait just a second girlie…" He grinned at her, shuffling slightly so she could see the glint of the blade he had in his other hand and she sighed. _God forbid_ she go anywhere and not have to fight for one reason or another. "What do you think you're doin'?"

"Losing my patience, evidently," She remarked as her other hand dropped. Of course she hadn't left Avengers Tower without arming herself at least _slightly_ and she knew she could put him down faster than he could draw the knife he had clearly shown her as a sign of intimidation. When his brows furrowed tightly in confusion Alice sighed, "Small words for the pea-brain, got it. I'm leaving and you're going to remove your hand or you're going to lose it. Your choice."

"That won't be necessary, Georgie, now will it?"

She turned her eyes briefly to the man standing beside her and watched as he addressed the larger man preventing her from leaving and quirking a non-existent brow in question. Alice's eyes flicked back towards the other man who seemed to immediately back down now that the other man had stepped in, watching as he stepped back and away.

"Heard you were looking for me, Step Up Revolution."

Alice's lips quirked into a humorous smile before nodding politely, "You got somewhere to talk that's a bit more private?"

"You're not propositioning me?"

"Not at present…if that changes you'll be the first to know."

Wade grinned suddenly, the expression nearly stunted by his disfigured face and Alice snorted as she took in his attire of jacket and hoodie over a graphic tee dictating something decidedly lewd about Barbara Streisand and jeans with a utility boot to match. She nodded for him to lead the way and followed after him quickly as he stepped out into the crisp air that seemed to have descended upon the Bronx and promised some kind of winter mix. Alice kept close to the other mutant, her boots barely scraping the pavement beneath her as she maintained her place slightly behind him. After a few turns he stepped up to the entrance of an apartment complex. Her brow quirked in question, missing his assessing gaze and glancing at the random passerby in trepidation, suddenly wondering if this was a good place to speak given the amount of people meandering by.

"You wanted to see me…and you don't look like the creepy fuck-your-face-up kinda gal."

Alice's brow quirked once again, "I did…it's twofold actually." She turned her gaze back to meet his eyes and sighed softly, "When Black Widow dumped both S.H.I.E.L.D and HYDRA's secrets –"

"I'm gonna stop you right there, Salvation Army." She shot him an incredulous look at the nickname and waited for him to continue, her face expressing her impatience, "I'm not a superhero and I'm not going on some kind of quest to save the world."

"I'm not asking you to," Alice interrupted with a frown. "I'm actually requesting the opposite. When their secrets were leaked I mined my way through that data dump and found something about _you_."

Wade's bare brow quirked in disbelief and he laughed loudly. "Yeah, okay."

"Wade Winston Wilson, born November 22nd, 1973 to Hailey Wilson and unconfirmed father Slade Wilson – though, _confirmed_ by the way, I checked – in Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada and has a medical file that ranges depending on who you ask, though many doctors theorized that you had some sort of mental disorder…you do, but not DID or schizophrenia like they assumed, no you've got ADHD and merely enjoyed messing with them. You then somehow managed to join U.S. Army Special Forces before being dishonorably discharged for not following orders – I assume that was more to do with your moral code rather than actual insubordination since you racked up over 41 confirmed kills – and then later being recruited to CIA-sponsored Mercenary Assassins. Two years ago you were diagnosed with advance-stage cancer in your liver, lungs, prostate and brain and then you were offered a chance to be cured…given false hope by what you didn't even know was Weapon X and I assume you still don't even know that that was what they were called." She spouted off easily, having hacked into his background after hearing Colossus speak about him, trying to endear him to Wolverine while she waited for her meeting with Xavier that morning. "Now correct me if I'm wrong, which I sincerely doubt, but that's you, isn't it? Ringing any bells yet or do I have to find another half-assed recently realized immortal surly enough to make Scrappy Doo look like less of a side character?" Her eyebrow arched challengingly and he stared at her for a few moments before she continued. "Now that I have your attention, the reason I'm telling you this is because I was taken by Weapon X's Department K branch back in the 60s and had a shit ton of blood drawn because – yay me I won the genetic lottery – I'm an original carbon copy on the immortal train – Wolverine isn't even the original. Point is, they took my blood and used it on you in a fucked up version of a serum that they'd been working on with help from HYDRA. Welcome to the family."

Wade's eyes narrowed on her before roughly grabbing her arm and stalking through the apartment building, sliding out a backdoor and pushing her against a wall, using the brick to keep her there. "Who told you?"

"Told me what?" She snorted, nonplussed at the rough treatment, though she did wince slightly when the brick behind her dug into her back despite her layers, "That you were an experiment or that you were Special Forces because now I'm confused."

"Don't play stupid with me."

"Oh, so your wonderfully charming and acerbic sarcasm is only reserved to you, gotcha. Look, I don't care about that. I found you because Weapon X has been working with _HYDRA_ the chuckleheads that were all over the news early last year? Yeah, those bag of dicks, and I'm planning on taking them out, but I can't do it alone. I've got my own score to settle with those assholes, since you were wronged by them just as much as I was, I figured I'd look you up and see if you wanted in. Again, my seeking you out was twofold. I wanted to take some form of responsibility for what they turned you into and I need help destroying them. Seemed to be a fair trade off."

"Look, I don't know who the hell you are –"

"Easy enough to clear up, I'm Alice Alexander."

The look he shot her wasn't amused, "But whatever you're selling I _don't fucking want it_. Fell down that acid-dream of a rabbit hole once, Wonderland, not looking to do it again."

"You're looking for a mutant known as Ajax…right?"

Wade stopped mid-turn and stared at her. The woman, while small in height compared to him, stood tall and unbothered – she hadn't brushed herself off from where he had roughly slammed her into the wall and she showed no sign of it having hurt her despite knowing that he hadn't been gentle. He took in her built and narrow figure, her eyes a cutting whiskey brown framed in darker makeup that made the optics appear to be glowing, but otherwise wore no other traceable makeup and he was reminded of Vanessa. Pain gripped his heart as he thought about his girlfriend – _fiancée_ he corrected himself; he _had_ proposed to her two years ago with a ring-pop after all – since he hadn't worked up the courage to even speak to her yet. With a frown he narrowed his eyes at her, the look slightly distorted on his disfigured face.

"You know Francis?"

Alice shook her head, "Know him? No, but I can help you _find_ him."

"And in return I help you, that it?"

"That would be my deal. I'm sure you were able to work out who I am by now."

Wade's eyes narrowed further, "Yeah, who the hell calls themselves _Override_? Better yet, who has _business_ cards made with their alias on them? I swear the Avengers make less and less sense the more I hear about you guys."

"I'm just someone who has enough connections that I want to stay hidden," She remarked with a smirk and ignoring the comment about the card she had slipped Weasel – the card only had a silhouette of a cat head on it and she knew it would be enough to get his attention, something she didn't bother to point out to him since she had only made it for that purpose and that purpose alone. "My work with the Avengers would certainly put a damper on the whole vigilante, antihero thing I'm going for at the moment. And I can try to keep as many of the Professor's mutants off your back while we work." When he stared at her she shrugged again, "The deal works out more in your favor than mine. I'm just looking to take out HYDRA and Weapon X all together…maybe save my special someone from them in the process, but it would also help us weed out where dickless and his merry band of chuckleheads has gone."

The other mutant considered her for a moment before giving her a sharp nod, "Alright deal. But if I don't like where this is going…"

"You're welcome to leave at any point," Alice nodded as a genuine smile tugged at her lips. "Though, I would prefer if you stuck around…it'd be nice for someone to have my back."

Wade considered her for a moment before nodding slowly, "Alright, you got a deal."

The brunette offered the man a small smirk before handing him a slip of paper, "My number is on this. Do try not to lose it and should you decide to get cheeky and sell this number out to telemarketers, just know I _do_ hack for a living now."

"Point taken, Macklemore."

**-0-**

Alice made it back to Avengers Tower in less time it took her to get to the Bronx and she sighed softly as she opened her apartment door, removing her coat and hanging it on the coatrack that Steve had painstakingly made sure she and Sam used – neither anticipating the patriot to have acute OCD about certain things. She immediately leaned down on reflex as Rumsfeld trotted over for his greeting before glancing around the apartment and finding it to be mysteriously empty.

"Where are they boy?" She questioned the dog in what both men dubbed her "animal-voice" which they pointed out every time she used without thinking. The slight ribbing was normal between the three of them and did little to actually bother her. "Where did S-squared get off to?"

"Steve's downstairs training and I was in the office," Sam stated as he entered the area and offering her a quirked brow at her attire, "did you raid Nat's closet?"

"No," She smirked before giving the large dog a final pat and moving into the kitchen that was just off of the entrance and beginning to make herself a coffee from the espresso machine she had convinced Tony she _absolutely_ needed. "You want a coffee?"

"If you're making them I'll have an Americano."

"You're such a dweeb," She snickered and earning a pout from the Pararescuer. "Anything else?"

"Nah," Sam waved her off. "Jodi was by earlier asking for you…she has questions about the software update you had Tony install into our suits."

"I think it's payback."

"Payback?"

"For asking Maria about that weird blue French horn that's in her office."

"She has a French horn in her office?"

She pressed the ground espresso into the filter and attached it back to the head and pressing the button and waiting for the hot water to push through to the small pitcher she had set beneath it to catch the coffee before answering him, "A _blue_ one yeah. I dropped off a few things she would need about the HYDRA base in Chile that we got that tip on and noticed it hanging up on the wall. She turned six shades of red and rushed me out of the office."

"Wait...Maria Hill…the same Maria Hill that whopped my ass during training the other day?" Sam guffawed suddenly, "No…I can't. You win, you broke me."

"Well…I may have also mentioned that she had received a text message from a Ted Mosby and _that_ was why she kicked me out."

"You think it's a boyfriend?"

"No, actually, I think it's someone who thinks he may be a boyfriend…or at least thinks coming on strong with someone like Maria is wise. Still trying to piece together why he keeps calling her Robin though…"

Sam stared at her poleaxed, "You _hacked_ her phone?!"

"No…" She snorted before placing his drink on the counter, having added the hot water and espresso to the mix. When he shot her a deadpanned expression she shrugged, "Yes…she wouldn't answer my messages!"

"That's not an excuse!"

"Seems to be the only way to get anyone's attention around here," She muttered snarkily as she began preparing her own drink.

Sam watched her from the small breakfast bar that separated the kitchen from the living room. He had learned through living with her that the mutant struggled with friendships and tended to push people away before they could get too close – something she was desperately trying to change about herself – which is why it hurt her more often than not when the team didn't seem to answer her finding that the action while Alice thought was normal, tended to come off as clingy. As he examined her, sipping at the coffee she had made him, she put the finishing touches on her own drink – an oat-milk latte as per usual (there were three different milk containers in their refrigerator considering Alice didn't like the taste of regular milk and Steve preferred whole milk to Sam's skim milk) – and turning to lean against the counter. She would normally clean up the machine before indulging her own coffee, but it seemed she was impatient and noticing her slight shiver he immediately understood before passing her the wool cardigan she normally left on the backs of the stools that lined their breakfast bar. She thanked him, tugging the warm cover over her shoulders and taking a long sip of her drink.

"Cold out there?"

" _Disgusting_ is what it is."

Sam's brow arched, "I thought you _liked_ the winter."

"No, I like the _idea_ of it…log cabins, snow, Christmas lights and warm fires with hot cocoa...I much prefer late fall or early spring. Just cold enough to wear layers, but not so cold that it makes you genuinely regret getting up in the morning," She snorted, suppressing another shiver and taking another long pull of her drink. The coffee scalded her tongue before healing over almost immediately after and earning her a pinched look from the former Pararescuer.

"I don't know whether to be jealous that you can drink your coffee like that or worried that you think it's okay."

She shrugged, "It helps that I have a mutation that heals it almost instantly."

"Been working at it?"

"Not for lack of trying," She smirked, "I think Natasha's jealous that I've been training more with you, Clint and Steve. We're currently using Jarvis to track how fast I can heal after certain types of trauma."

"You're insane… _both_ of you…it's the only reasonable explanation."

"Watch it, Wilson, she may hear you."

"Too late," Natasha snorted from the doorway as she looked in between them before helping herself to one of Alice's premade protein shakes in the fridge.

It wasn't unusual for the woman to magically appear in their apartment over the last few months and especially since coming back from her solo mission in her homeland. As soon as she had gotten back, she had grabbed both Clint and Alice and spirited them away to talk and get a haircut, her once lengthy hair tickling her chin by the time the archer had finished styling it. After that the two women and Clint had a long discussion about what had occurred and the mutant had felt it necessary to spill her remaining truths to both. Natasha reached down, patting Rumsfeld on his head as she turned, flopping onto a stool beside Sam.

"Xavier said that I may be able to expand my ability to heal instantaneously, but to do so would mean I need to be under a constant state of stress. Nat and I have been working on creating that stress in a more controlled environment."

"Meaning," Natasha stated after taking a sip of the chocolate, peanut butter and banana shake, "I get to beat the shit out of her until she's not able to heal as fast." Sam looked between the two women with brows arching towards his hairline and earning giggles from both before the former spy turned her gaze to the mutant, "How'd that go this morning by the way?"

"About as great as I expected it," She sighed. "The professor doesn't approve of much of what I do, but he knows he has absolutely no right to protest what I choose or choose not to do because: a) I'm older than him and b) not one of his students. He was annoyed when I asked him to spare Logan a few minutes with me."

"Nothing about how to develop your mutation more?"

"He seems to think that it _can_ be developed, but wasn't really forthright with the _how_."

Sam frowned, "Isn't his job to help mutants?"

"Normally, yes," She nodded and tucking her cardigan closer around her form and crossing her arms to keep the garment closed around her frame – clearly still cold. "But he and I have always been at odds. He likes me more than Magneto, but that's like saying that you hate apples but you like apple juice."

"That doesn't make sense," The man sighed, running a hand over his recent shape-up, having forced Steve to go with him to the barbers after insisting that the patriot would enjoy the experience – Steve, did in fact, enjoy the experience. They all looked up when Steve entered the apartment, taking in the scene before him.

"What doesn't make sense?"

"Alice had her appointment with Professor X this morning." Natasha answered before taking another sip of the protein shake from the straw, the scene comical with the way she glanced at them all with the straw clenched between full lips – she almost looked like the cat who ate the canary and Alice didn't appreciate it and especially when Steve's head snapped in her direction as if looking for an explanation.

"Went to talk to him about my mutation and how to help it develop," She gave him the short-story before returning to what she had been saying when the patriot nodded in understanding. They had spoken about it briefly the night before while Sam had been out scouting a lead on Bucky. "And I said the same thing, Sam. Xavier and I disagree on quite a lot. He believes that all mutants should have a controlled environment to learn their mutations, which I don't necessarily disagree with, but those kids _live_ there and while some don't have a choice I think they should be able to choose. He and I butt heads about the methods more often than I care to admit…I turned out fine, but he treats every case like it's world ending and like all telepaths he's a manipulative shit especially when he believes it'll help for the better."

"But he's better than this Magneto, right?"

Alice considered the question, knowing that while none of them could relate she could understand why they would think such. Magneto was certainly more radical than Xavier, but she didn't feel particularly strong in regards to either of their beliefs and it's what made her significantly less popular with other mutants and why she tended to avoid them. But as far as she was concerned she had outlived many of them and she didn't need other mutants' opinions to validate what or who she was.

"Magneto…is notoriously less patient than Xavier when it comes to mutant rights." She chose the words carefully and fingering her necklace as she spoke, "He thinks that mutants are human's evolution, therefore we're superior, and he's never had any problem in letting normal people get caught in the crossfire if it meant protecting a mutant. Eric and Charles are two sides of the same coin. Eric was experimented on at Auschwitz," She said by explanation to Steve who frowned openly. "When HYDRA was suddenly taken down during the war, those who were in concentration camps that exhibited strong traits especially were taken."

"How'd you know about him?"

"I treated him briefly before he ran off…only reason I knew who he was, was the tattoo on his wrist. Most Jews were given a number…not unlike mutants who were taken for experimentation."

"You sympathized with him," Steve seemed to understand, "but that doesn't excuse the actions taken afterwards."

She shrugged, hiding the wince at his words as she turned to clean up the mess she had made of the espresso machine. She heard a smack, muffled by fabric, and a muttered _ouch_ as she ran the water through the filters. "He and I aren't so different…I just decided world domination wasn't worth putting on my list of things to do."

"I'm sorry, Al…I didn't mean it like that."

"I know…it's fine." She shrugged again before placing her cup in the sink. "Anyway, Xavier didn't give me much else other than pushing my mutation to its limit and Logan wasn't all that helpful either...more focused on arguing with Colossus. So long as I don't die again I should be able to work it like a muscle." She then sent a meaningful look to Natasha who shrugged lightly, tucking a curl behind her ear and offering the mutant a smirk. "Let's try to avoid broken bones though…I'll run a few diagnostic tests with Bruce later to see if hairline fractures will help strengthen my bones so that I'm not wobbling around like a newborn deer every time I have to refuse them."

"I'll bear that in mind," The Russian nodded. "How's everything going with the Barnes case?"

"Like shit.", "Not great." Sam and Alice chorused together earning a longsuffering look from Steve and an arched brow from the former spy. Sam took over, "We've managed to read through the file thanks to Alice's translation…but it's dark man."

"I told you both that you may not want to pull on that thread," Natasha said, though this was directed at the mutant and patriot.

"It's not just that," Steve sighed as he ran a hand through his hair, stepping around the mutant to reach the fruit bowl in the corner. "It's almost like he's completely disappeared. No instances and no traces. The last lead we got was last night and that turned out to be a dead end."

"Where?" The Russian frowned and watching as Alice took the offered half of banana that Steve held out to her, a silent apology that the mutant clearly was accepting.

"Brooklyn."

When Natasha met Alice's eyes the mutant shrugged, "Don't look at me. I already told them both that I doubt he'd stay in the US considering how thorough the CIA and FBI have been with putting him on the most wanted list. He's smarter than that."

"Have they alerted Interpol?"

"Not yet," Alice sighed and ignoring the looks from both men. "It's only a matter of time though. Last time I was on the run I went to the very places that they'd think would be the last place I'd go. Department K was in Canada and I had been picked up here in New York so they either thought I'd run to another country or go back to the Eastern half of the states. I went West because of that and wound up in San Francisco before Fury found me." She tugged her hand through her straightened hair – something that hadn't gone unnoticed to the men in the apartment, Natasha knew that it was a girl thing to get dressed up to feel better and if it worked for the mutant then she wouldn't say anything. Alice continued, oblivious to the looks being sent around the room, "The only good thing about this situation is that they don't have enough information to immediately identify him and he's stayed hidden for this long. I've been working on it, but I'm scared to run facial recognition because I haven't developed a program that I'm confident would make that exclusively accessible to us."

"Meaning that anyone would be able to find him," Steve concluded with a sigh. When Alice nodded he frowned. "How far have you managed to get with the serum?"

"Honestly? Not far," She frowned, "between my classes and Zola's notes being vague at best it's been hard to break down the serum's composition and figure out if it's exactly like yours. What I _did_ manage to figure out though was that it's apparently the very same he was being given when he was taken with the 107th. It may be _why_ he was able to survive the fall."

The patriot offered her a small smile, "Does this mean you need a blood sample?"

"I'd prefer to say no, but I think I'm gonna have to take you up on the offer." She frowned, "I wanted to avoid it as much as possible, but I shouldn't need much…just enough that I can run a test or two. I'd much rather not leave too much to chance while I compare the serums because I don't need that information getting out."

"Probably for the best," Steve agreed with a nod. Alice sighed softly with a tired smile directed at him.

"Other than that…I've gotten about as far as deciding that if Zola wasn't really dead and gone this time – trust me I went looking for that smug asshole on the web – I'd take more pleasure than I should killing him." She snorted derisively, "Phillips, for as great as a Colonel and leader as he was, was an idiot thinking it was smart to bring him in."

Natasha's brow arched, "Oh you managed to get that far in the S.H.I.E.L.D dump."

"No…Steve told me and I made it a priority to make sure that he didn't escape on the web when the two of you were blown up in that bunker." She deadpanned, earning snorted laughter from Sam and a muted groan from Steve. "I also managed to find that my information wasn't dumped…thank you for that, by the way."

"As I was dumping S.H.I.E.L.D and HYDRA's secrets I made sure to get rid of any trace of you in their records…but that doesn't mean that HYDRA didn't already get their hands on it especially if Pierce was looking into it."

"At this point, who knows…I'll see if I can trace it when I'm not otherwise occupied."

The Russian quirked a brow at the mutant's answer, but didn't comment. The Avengers all knew Alice was pursuing two different doctoral degrees at the moment and had been limited to the tower for missions – something she had insisted upon when she took up Tony's suggestion. Natasha also knew that the mutant was still dealing with her fragile mental health.

"Have you guys found any other traces?"

"No," Steve answered the Russian's question as Alice chewed on the banana she had seemingly forgotten about until that very moment.

"I don't want to rain on your parade any more than we clearly are," Sam began tentatively as his gaze bounced between the two and he could feel Natasha shifting next to him, "but have either of you considered that he doesn't want to be found?"

Alice and Steve shared a look before the patriot frowned. "I left him once even when he refused to leave me…I'd never forgive myself if I didn't go looking for him this time. I won't do it." The group's eyes turned to the mutant to see her eyes were gazing at the floor as if it were the most interesting thing in the world, her hand weaving his coin between her fingers. "Alice?"

Her eyes jerked up to meet Steve's concerned gaze from the corner of her eye before her eyes flickered to both Sam and Natasha's, "I _know_ he doesn't want to be found…"

"Excuse me?"

"Let me finish," She snapped at the patriot before settling her glare at the counter of the breakfast bar, her hazel eyes not meeting anyone in the room. "When I found him on the banks of the Potomac with you he seemed…different…cognizant even, but not at the same time. He recognized who you were not because you were Captain America, but because you were Steve – you said so yourself that he seemed different once your mask came off. I don't know if he recalled me as clearly considering I don't look like I did in the '40s if at all, but all I know is that he was completely blank when I saw him last…he kicked me around that bank interior like I was a soccer ball and it wasn't _him_ …maybe he does remember and feels guilty for it. Most people freak out when I brush off fatal injuries if they don't already know I can do it." She sighed, "If he's truly regaining his memories, which seems to be the case, he's going to retreat to places he can lay low and keep away from the population just enough to prevent him from relapsing back into the mind of the Winter Soldier." Her gaze finally met Sam's, "Does that sound about right or is my psychological analysis off?"

"No, it's congruent with most cases of PTSD in its early stages…" The former Pararescuer admitted with a sigh before meeting Steve's eyes. "If Alice is right then we can assume – with his training alone – that if he doesn't want to be found he won't be…not until he chooses to come out of hiding or he's forced."

"Let's just hope he chooses," Alice sighed softly, her arms circling herself tighter, "he hasn't had autonomy in a long time…he deserves that at the very least."

The group fell into silence before the mutant excused herself, muttering that she was going to her lab in an effort to run further analysis on Bucky's file, the apartment door shutting behind her and the sound of her heeled boots disappearing down the hall. Natasha was the first to break the silence as she sighed.

"We need to be careful with her still," She then narrowed her eyes at the two men, "while she's doing better, constantly challenging her opinion isn't going to help her."

Steve frowned, "I don't know what you want me to do. We're _both_ invested in this."

"We know that, Steve. We're not saying that either of you are right or wrong."

The patriot's eyes turned to Sam who had been quiet since he had initially posed the question that had led to the tension in the room. "And what do you think?"

"Are you asking because you want to know my answer or because you want me to agree with you?"

"I just can't help but feel as if she's deliberately leaving things out."

"She's disassociating," Sam sighed as if the conversation with the patriot was taking more energy than he had at that moment. "It's how she handles her feelings and keeps them from affecting her thought process. She's trying to look at things clinically because it's the only way she can deal with everything going on. You should know that considering how long you've known her and how close you two are."

"Steve," Natasha began softly, "we aren't telling you these things to hurt you, but so that you understand that it may not be the way _you_ deal with these things…Alice is still dealing with what happened to her. For all intents and purposes, Barnes killed Alice. I warned you back in May that this is going to be a process."

"You saw the fight?"

"It wasn't a fight, Steve…it was a lamb sent into the slaughter."

Sam shifted in his seat, "Dude, you saw the way her _face_ looked like on that monitor when she got in touch with us at the Triskelion. She was beaten to death and we both know it."

As Steve went to leave the apartment – assumedly to apologize to the mutant – Natasha stopped him, her hand encircling his arm and she shook her head, "For now, just leave it…she'll come to you when she's ready. Just…take it easy with her."

The patriot only sighed in defeat before nodding slowly and muttering an excuse to leave as well before disappearing down the hallway to his own room. Natasha shared a look with Sam who raised his hands in a clear sign of surrender and taking a pull of his coffee and sighing, "Which one you wanna tackle?"

"Dealer's choice."

Sam only snorted in amusement before sighing softly, "You take Cap…I'll get Alice."

"You sure?" Natasha's brow arched, "I thought you would've jumped on the opportunity to try and get through to Steve…he tends to be the easier one."

"True, but I think he needs _your_ brand of tough love."

"Just be careful, Wilson. She isn't the only one hurting here."

"Right," Sam nodded as he stepped into the kitchen to rinse out his mug. "I can see how the two of them had a falling out in 1945. They're both stubborn idiots."

The Russian chuckled, "Our idiots."

"And they wouldn't know how to actually talk about their problems if it bit them in the ass."

"True," Natasha chuckled, "Good luck."

"You too."

**-0-**

Alice pulled her hair back into a low bun as she stepped into her lab, the furrow to her brow only accentuating the scowl on her lips. Her mind kept circulating the discussion that had occurred in her shared apartment with the boys and she couldn't help but sigh. She and Steve had always had a hard time navigating their feelings for Bucky and she blamed that particularly on their complete reliance on the dark haired soldier to balance them. It had never been fair to the sharpshooter, but somehow she and the patriot seemed incapable of having a decent conversation when it came to him. Maybe it was because they were so similar and they both tended to have a temper, but she couldn't help hers at the moment.

Yes, she had agreed to Tony's recommendation at the doctoral programs, hoping that if she kept her mind occupied with something other than their missing person's case, that maybe she could force herself to heal like she always seemed to. But all it served to do was give her an excuse to forego sleep. Alice already had a hard enough time sleeping before the events in Washington back in May; but now her mind was plagued with memories and horrible scenarios bred from the small amount of time Pierce had her detained. She knew there were greater demons than him out there, and she was eager to take them out. She hadn't been completely honest with the Avengers and by extension Sam, Maria and Jodi when she had said she had been monitoring HYDRA. She kept just enough focus on the bases that were making the biggest waves for her to pick up on, but she had been compiling a list of names and other more secretive units to hit with Deadpool.

Her main concern was Bucky, of course, but she wanted to know exactly why Weapon X was showing up along with HYDRA files. It was obvious that they were bridging and were serving each other, but the _why_ was what was escaping her and she didn't like unknown variables. As her phone vibrated in her pocket she frowned, retrieving the device and quirking a brow at the message that greeted her:

**Unknown:** _Just so you know I demand compensation for our agreement…chimichangas while hilarious to say are not a proper form of payment. Pancakes or tacos are acceptable ;)_

Alice immediately knew who the message was from and smirked as she wrote a quick message in return.

**Alice:** _I believe that can be arranged…_  
**Alice:** _We can pick some up while in Mexico. This weekend work for you?_   
**Wade:** _I'll meet you at the bar. It's a date Macklemore_

She ignored the series of emojis that he had used and rolled her eyes before saving his number and tucking her phone back into her pocket before tapping the table top of her lab and bringing up the schematics she had been steadily working on in an effort to find Bucky. Facial recognition wasn't a new concept, however, many governments and companies used it and that of course included agencies such as the FBI, CIA and other law enforcement and she didn't want to run the risk of those agencies finding him before she, Steve and Sam had the opportunity to. She wanted to ensure that if she was to run a program that used facial recognition software it would be secure and of her own making.

"Hey Jarvis, could you turn on some music for me please?" She questioned into the open air as she began playing around with the schematic.

" _Any particular music choice you'd prefer today Miss Alexander?_ "

Alice pursed her lips for a moment before shrugging, "How many times do I have to ask you not to call me _Miss Alexander_? Just Alice will do..." She allowed herself a small laugh, knowing that no matter how many times she asked the AI to change her name he would continue to call her _Miss_. "Anyway, I know I'll get some shit for it, but some hard rock would be incredible right about now."

" _Of course_ ," The AI agreed before the music began to play lightly in the background.

Jarvis had learned her preferences rather quickly and unless she asked for a difference in the music settings such as volume or genre he preset them to be merely a soft hum as to not be too distracting. Alice preferred to hear if someone was coming into the lab, but today was not one of those days. She wanted everyone to know that she wasn't in the mood to talk as soon as they stepped off the elevator.

"Thanks Jarvis…also, do you mind raising the volume to eighty-five percent?"

" _Are you certain?_ "

"It's just been one of those days."

" _Of course,_ " The AI seemed to understand and, just before raising the volume to what she barely recognized as one of Breaking Benjamin's earlier hits and one that she had heard a few times over the years on the radio, his measured voice spoke once more. " _Is there anything else I can do for you?_ "

"No that's okay. Thanks again, Jarvis, I appreciate it."

" _Please let me know if I can assist you with anything further_.

"I certainly will."

The music thrummed against the walls of the lab and if the room had been constructed by anyone else, Alice would have been worried that the bass alone would crack the glass walls. Tony was a music lover, however, and had built the labs with acoustics in mind since he enjoyed blasting Black Sabbath at all hours of the day and long into the night. The labs were also meant to muffle the sounds of explosions in the event Tony was testing out a new piece of equipment for his or the team's suits or just another pet project that went awry. She sighed softly, adjusting the heat in the room manually and pulling the dolphin grey cardigan off of her shoulders, tossing the garment onto her work table and pushing her sleeves up so she could work unhindered.

Bringing up Bucky's file was almost a habit at this point and she began working her way from the beginning once more. Alice could, if asked, perhaps recite the beginning portion of his file from memory alone, but she couldn't help it. It was slowly tearing her apart from the inside to read how he had literally been torn apart and put back together again and again, but the part of her that was dedicated to science and medicine needed to fully understand the mechanics. Her hands stilled as his military picture settled onto the screen, her teeth catching her bottom lip and worrying the flesh there before she sighed, flopping into the cushioned stool (normally used in doctor's examination rooms and one she had stolen from Bruce's lab when he had briefly returned to India to care for the less fortunate as he had done back in 2012 – he tended to return to the country once a year as if it were a personal mission and no one questioned him) and resting her elbows against the table top.

With effort she removed the necklace from her neck, her fingers tracing the dime as she had done hundreds of times before, her eyes tracing the almost too smooth edges of the braided metal from her constant toying. She pinched the token between her fingers and studied the helmed figure and the word _Liberty_ haloed just above the depicted woman's head. The top of the coin had a small, man-made hole cut into it and she vaguely wondered how long it took Bucky to push a hole through the top so he could sneak the other piece of metal through to hold the coin along the chain.

It was in this position that Sam found her, slouched over the computerized lab table, spine bowed and supported by her elbows and playing with the charm of her necklace almost reverently. Her feet were crossed at her ankles, her legs spread to perhaps balance her weight better on the stool. His eyes traced her face and the somber expression that seemed to echo in her posture before his eyes flickered to the hologram sitting in front of her. She had clearly been running the file once again, but the image of the handsome soldier sat before her.

Sam hadn't truly understood where Steve and Alice were coming from initially, concerned that they were chasing a ghost of a man that would ultimately bring them to ruin. He was a mental health and PTSD counselor before anything else and he had his time to mourn Riley and grow from it. Steve, because of being frozen for so long, was actually younger than him and even still it was like seeing a recruit just coming home from war. The Pararescuer understood those feelings more than he ever cared to admit.

After Riley's death, Sam had been a mess. He had found himself at the bottom of more than one bottle and the only person he had come to rely on was his sister, Monica, but she had still been in school – his parents long gone. He hadn't really had anyone to help him through perhaps the hardest time in his life, but it had taken a very stubborn Navy Veteran of the Vietnam War by the name of Victor Sullivan – Sully he preferred to be called – that he had run into one morning getting coffee to get him to the VA for counseling. Sam still kept in contact with the older man whenever he could, the old man becoming a father figure to him during that very dark time. With the old man's help he had decided to go back to school with the use of his G.I. bill and use his degree to help others. He saw much of that horror echoed in both Steve and Alice.

But Alice was different to Steve's circumstances. The mutant had been veteran to many wars and understood her mental health much more than Steve understood his own. She, unlike Steve, had time to reconcile life without Bucky and his absence, his death. For Steve, it was still _very_ fresh, merely a few years compared to the seventy years Alice had had to endure the knowledge of her lover's death. But there were other things that mounted to the mutant's current mental state and not all of them had to do with the handsome soldier or the patriot.

Alice had, at a time she was perhaps still mourning and still working through PTSD, been forcefully taken and experimented on. He wasn't ignorant of this as the mutant had mentioned it in passing, but never in detail. There were times he would come into the room and rummage through his own things and she would jump sky high before settling herself and muttering an apology or where he would accidently brush her without her actively being aware of her surroundings and she would skitter away like a startled cat. She had done this with Steve as well, and Sam had a pretty decent idea of what other things they had put her through during her twenty years of captivity. The worst of her fears took the form of needles, however, something that the former Pararescuer had been surprised at considering she was a nurse. He had discovered this fear one afternoon while she had been speaking to Bruce in his lab after agreeing to a blood draw – as she had recently been curious as to what her own blood could tell her about her mutation – and she had nearly had a panic attack just looking at the needles. Bruce had been understanding and had distracted her well enough to get at least a vial. When Sam had asked her about it she had admitted that the reason had been something Alexander Pierce had revealed to her and she wanted to see if there was any merit to his claims. She hadn't explained further and he knew not to push her too much on the subject.

Shaking his head he knocked on the table she was leaning on aware that she probably couldn't hear him over the music blasting through the lab. As predicted, she jumped.

"Jarvis, could you bring the music down?"

" _Certainly_."

The AI's voice sounded half sarcastic before the music lowered to a reasonable level and she turned her eyes to Sam, the cinnamon colored optics quickly flickering away and back to the coin in her hands.

"Never thought you'd be the post-grunge, hard rock kinda girl…"

"It depends on my mood," She shrugged, her voice barely a whisper as she answered him. "What do you want Sam?"

His brow arched, "I just came down to see if you're alright…no ulterior motive, I promise."

"Yeah…" She murmured, her eyes briefly flickering to the face of her soldier staring back at her. Smooth lines, full lips quirked into a natural smile despite the staged photo, gun-metal blue eyes arched and carefree, dark hair neatly combed underneath the cap of his Class A uniform and his rank pins gleaming against his collar. Her eyes fell back to the charm between her fingers, "Yeah, I'm _fine_."

"It's okay not to be okay, you know," Sam sighed before dragging over another stool and gently laying his hand over hers. "I know how hard this is for you to go through…I'd give anything for Riley to be still alive somewhere…and I know that the two of you would be talking my ass back from the ledge if the shoe was on the other foot."

Alice watched the way his thumb traced an arc back and forth against the back of her hand, "I know he's out there Sam, but I don't think actively looking for him is going to find him and I won't use the software until I can guarantee that it won't help law enforcement or whatever is left of HYDRA find him. If he was recaptured I'd never be able to forgive myself."

"No one is asking that of you –"

"Steve _is_." She frowned, "Bucky isn't the same man he was in the 40s…I _know_ that in my heart that he's not the same…because I wasn't the same after twenty years…I'm not the same now."

Sam watched the emotions run unbidden across her pretty features and none of them were positive. "Steve is just trying to deal with the situation as best as he can..."

"Steve is latching onto the first thing that reminds him of the life he once had," Alice bit out waspishly. "It's frustrating because I want to find Bucky just as badly as he does, but what I want and what Steve wants _doesn't matter_ …Did you get to the part in the file that shows just _how long_ it took for the brainwashing to finally set in?" Sam watched as anger replaced the sorrow that had wrapped her in its cold arms, " _Twenty years_ …he _fought back_ for _twenty years_ and what did _I_ do during that time? The war was over, I could have easily gone back and try and find him…maybe I would've found him before they managed to operate on him _seven_ times before his body took to the prosthetic, stopped them from injecting him continuously with a serum that could _kill_ him and, I don't know, wasn't guaranteed to _work_ …maybe I could have done something – _anything_ – to prevent HYDRA from ruining his life. I had _eighteen years_ to do something and what did I do?" She snorted at herself, "I wallowed in my own self-pity and studied the artifact that annihilated my friends, brothers and sisters in arms and let myself get caught and in doing so they made _my blood_ a serum for Weapon X." Sam said nothing as she continued to verbally lash herself, her diatribe far from over, "every time I close my eyes I'm back in that lab being peeled away bit by bit and being told that it's for the _greater good_ and that _I'm going to pave the way to the future of humanity_. Every time I close my eyes I see Bucky _remembering us_ and being _punished_ for it…I see him strapped to that _fucking chair_ as they wipe his memories with a machine meant to send _electricity_ though the nervous system to rewrite the neuropathways _they_ wrote and then I see him as _the Winter Soldier_ – cold, calculating, blank, used." She hiccupped on a sob, "And then I remember the look on the Strike teams' faces – on _Pierce's_ face – as I died over and over and _over_ again and suddenly I was back in Department K being torn apart again and again…I'm _tired_ , Sam, so, so tired and I'm angrier than I ever have been and I don't know the first way to manage it!"

The broken posture and steadily heaving breaths was all the encouragement that the former Pararescuer needed as he pulled her into his arms and allowed her to release the pent up emotions she had been hiding away behind her collected exterior. Initially she fought him, as if trying to create space between them before she slumped against him, boneless. After a few moments he sighed softly, running his hand along her back in comfort. He realized quickly that her tears weren't from sadness, but from her being frustrated and not knowing how to convey the emotion while trying to manage the word vomit that seemed to have been completely unplanned. Sam understood where she was coming from in that regard as he was an angry crier himself and he understood why this situation hit her so close to the chest and it wasn't just because this was someone she loved, it was because she lived through it. She had firsthand experience.

The two of them sat in the lab for some time, Jarvis seeming to have turned off the music she had been listening to before and the Pararescuer thanked the AI silently. Alice had quickly removed herself after a few moments, wiping her eyes and silently moving away from him – her fingers removing Bucky's image from the main portion of the screen and instead trying to break down the elements that were used in the serum that Zola had documented in the file. Sam took her copy of the file and began working through the beginning parts of the file as well, jotting notes in an unused notebook off to the side.

"Thanks…"

Sam looked up to see that Alice's features had smoothed over for the most part with the exception of the slight furrow to her brow and the flushed nose and red-rimmed eyes to show that she had been crying. He offered her a small quirk of his lips in reply, "Sure thing…"

"It's just…I'm angry at myself more than anything."

"Why's that?"

Alice sighed, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her pierced ears, "Because maybe if I had been more forceful that day on the Potomac, maybe it'd have fixed whatever issues Steve and I have with one another."

"What do you mean?"

"I let him go," she answered in a whisper. "He asked me if I would let him go and I did…his only other want was that I take care of Steve before he disappeared."

The man shook his head. While he hadn't known about their interaction with one another he couldn't hold it against her. She had given the soldier a choice – the first choice he had been offered since being brainwashed and Sam realized that Alice was much kinder than anyone gave her credit for. She understood that her actions would lead Steve to become upset with her if he were to ever find out, but she knew she couldn't make that choice for someone else – let alone someone who perhaps wasn't sure what he wanted more than she could tell him. He found himself admiring the woman before him as if seeing her for the first time, "Why didn't you tell us?"

"How could I? It wasn't my choice to make, Sam. I've been in his position before, the only difference was that I _couldn't_ forget and so I had all of my memories…People are going to call him a monster, I'm not oblivious to that and if Steve had it his way he would try and integrate Bucky into the Avengers' fold whether he wanted to or not. Bucky never wanted to fight, never wanted to kill and I guarantee that remains even behind all of that brainwashing. I know a little bit about being a monster."

"You're not a monster, Alice."

Her brow arched nearly meeting her hairline in incredulity as she took in his stern tone, as if he was certain that what he was saying was true. "Are you so sure? In 1778, after being raped and brutalized I slaughtered every last soldier who played a part in my murder. In 1986, after my cell failed to lock, I hunted every single person who worked in the facility I was kept and murdered them…didn't matter to me if they knew what was truly happening or not – whether they played a knowing part in my torture. I didn't care. The difference between me and Bucky, Sam, is that he didn't have a choice in the matter…I did and I chose death and destruction as if I was judge, jury and executioner every time." She watched as his face hardened as he tried to make play at stoicism in order to hide his reaction, but the tightness to his features proved that he hadn't known about the decisions she had made that resorted in her hands being buried in blood. "If he's a monster…then I'm an abomination and that's not me being self-deprecating. That's merely the truth of the matter, whether anyone around here chooses to acknowledge it or not – which in most cases they like to forget because it's easier." After a brief silence, she shrugged, "Regardless, maybe if I had been more firm in my stance at the time he'd have come around sooner."

Sam was quiet for a long while after her admission, considering what she told him. He had seen how she fought when she had daringly tackled the Winter Soldier away from Natasha in an effort to give the woman time to evacuate people and form a plan and he knew she wasn't green when it came to combat. She knew how to ebb and flow in a fight even if she still needed to be fine-tuned, but after knowing her for nearly a year he couldn't picture the woman she was claiming to be. Shaking his head he decided to let the topic drop in favor of picking up the small olive branch she had extended to him in the form of their previous topic.

"That wouldn't have changed anything…in fact, it probably would've made it worse."

"Why's that?"

"Because then you two would be at each other's throats about how to help him." She knew he was right and met his eyes across the lab, when they made eye contact he continued, "You and Steve handle things differently. Steve is all about running head first into a problem or burying it until he can't control it anymore and you withdraw so you can look at it from a different perspective. You're a medical professional…officially will be too when you finish your degree – so you tend to look at things from that standpoint and try to take your personal feelings out of the equation completely." He placed his notebook off to the side, "You two both have the same goals, just different ways of showcasing them. You _both_ need to start talking about the things that bother you when it comes to Barnes and setting a game plan so that if and _when_ he shows up you'll be able to make the transition for him as seamless as possible. Added stress between the two of you isn't going to help him _heal_."

Alice considered the man for a moment before nodding slowly to show she understood before taking a deep breath, "Will you tell me…about Riley?"

Sam offered her a gentle smile, "Sure…but maybe not tonight. You've got an exam tomorrow right?"

" _Shit_!"

Sam laughed as Alice shut everything down in the lab before he stood, tucking his bench underneath another work table and grabbing his notebook and Alice's cardigan before walking with her back towards the elevator. They hadn't spoken much about what had happened with her outburst, but perhaps – with time – Sam could get the mutant to understand that there were people around her who genuinely care about her and would never judge her for who she's become.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** Wow...that whole ending part was not meant to happen but as I got into the chapter I felt it important to show how small comments truly impact on Alice in her current state of mind. There is a slight mania to her here also a very volatile nature that was hinted at but never truly seen. Also, I don't necessarily want people to think Sam is only around to act as a therapist. He is a therapist, however, that's not who he is as a person, but I do picture him as being empathetic.
> 
> There's a whole hella've a lot to unpack here, but Alice as a character is someone who bottles a lot of her problems. There are some things she will communicate, however, she's not someone who easily shares her deepest problems and here we see that she's overwhelmed and so word-vomit. Keep in mind that she's still technically a woman from the 1700s when it wasn't acceptable to speak true emotions/feelings/fears with another person. In colonial America it was expected of women to be seen and not heard, to be a caregiver, etc.
> 
> I wanted to show how really torn apart Alice is in this situation and what the weight of her frustrations are doing to her. Let me just disclaim here and say that Steve is not aware of what his words do to others all of the time. After rewatching the MCU multiple times and seeing what he says in certain situations it's clear that while he thinks he's delivering his words kindly or in a way that shows how honest he is, he's brutally honest and isn't always aware of how he says things. Case and point being during Civil War at the beginning of the Airport battle: "I'm trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart!", "You did that when you signed." THIS LINE MADE ME RAGE IN THE THEATER and still makes me rage years later. This entire movie could have been handled differently if Tony was emotionally intelligent and Steve was a little more diplomatic about how he delivered his ideas/thoughts/words. I know I paint Steve to be an asshole at times, but I promise it's necessary development both between the two of them growing together as well as how I picture them both developing individually...just wanted to make all that clear, lol!
> 
> Also, fun to note! It took me FOREVER to research Wade mother-fluffing Wilson. His backstory is crazy and while in the comics he does have schizophrenia at least to some degree, I'm not confident enough to write it and I'm working off of the cannon that Ryan Reynolds set in the movie. Also, did you know Deadpool does NOT, in fact, like chimichangas? He prefers tacos or pancakes, but always says chimichanga because he thinks the word is hilarious!
> 
> As always, if you haven't already I cannot plug simmerandcry's story which includes a ploy-romance between her OC, Avery, and our two favorite WWII veterans. She's weaving an incredible story and you'd be missing out if you didn't already go read it!
> 
> Anyway, thanks so much for all the love and support and I hope you all enjoyed this chapter! This mayyyy be the last installment for a while just as I'm taking a mental health break as well as time to get myself back together as my sister and I are currently in the process of looking for another apartment! But I PROMISE I will be back! I love you all and I will see you in the next one!
> 
> All of the love,
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	21. Beneath it All

_As the Sky May Fall_  
 _Deadpool_ **/|\** _Age of Ultron_  
 _21_

Steve was woken up in the middle of the night from his door opening; the slight disturbance pulling him from the very beginnings of what he was sure would have become a bad dream. Not quite a nightmare, but a dream that would scatter to the back of the mind upon waking; a dream that wouldn't frighten, but would certainly rake icy tendrils of dread down the back. It took his groggy mind a few moments to determine whether he was in any danger or not, but suddenly realized that there couldn't be a danger considering Jarvis would have sounded an alarm if there were an actual intruder and he listened as the door closed with a soft _click_.

Barely traceable footsteps stopped next to his bedside before he felt the comforter lift and a small body slide into the empty spot beside him. Immediately he knew that his guest was Alice, as the two of them had done this before and it appeared as if she had just woken from a nightmare otherwise she would have gone into the living room or office instead.

"I'm sorry I woke you," Her voice cracked as she sniffed and shuffled closer to him. Steve felt a frown pull at his lips before he flipped himself over, careful to not crush her, and raised his arm in invitation. She wasted no time in curling into the new space, her head resting against his chest, her body seeming to tremble. "I'm sorry…"

"Don't apologize," He returned groggily, his arm curling back around her and cradling her to him. "You've got nothing to apologize for."

She scoffed slightly even as she fisted his t-shirt and pressed herself closer to him. He could feel she was wearing a hoodie – more than likely one of Sam's since he didn't wear pullovers (preferring zip ups that seemed to go missing more often than not and would suspiciously turn up in Natasha's possession) – that was much too large and a pair of thick, fleece-lined joggers – an assumption on his part since she tended to wear the same things nightly – as well as a pair of wool socks. Alice disliked being cold, something she admitted was because it had been something they would use to control subjects in the lab she had been held captive in.

The irony wasn't lost on him since learning that Bucky had been forced into cryo-freeze when he wasn't actively being used by HYDRA; it seemed that she shared the same experience to a certain degree. She had admitted on more than one occasion that she'd much rather be cold than too hot, despite her general dislike of the cold, her reasoning being: _you can always throw layers on to warm up, but there were only so many layers that could be taken off to cool down and still remain too hot_. He had vaguely followed the logic when she had initially explained it, but otherwise he didn't fully understand it. Despite being frozen for so long, Steve didn't hate the cold – he actually preferred it in most cases as winter had always been his favorite season, even as a sickly child. He preferred it to the humid summers at any rate.

"I'm sorry about earlier…it's just…we both just get protective of him and it's not fair to think that my way would yield an outcome better than yours…you've known him much longer than I have." She whispered into the still silence of the room, "but…I'm just so afraid that he's not going to be the same man I loved and that you loved…that people will judge him for things that were out of his control. It scares me…more than it should."

Steve sighed. Natasha had warned him that this would happen and that Alice would inevitably apologize before he managed to get the courage to do so himself. The Russian understood where he was coming from, but after explaining how the mutant perhaps saw the situation he had begun to understand that ultimately they wanted the same thing. How could he begrudge her for handling the situation in the only way she had been handling it for so many years? With his and Natasha's talk, he had realized that he and Alice were always going to handle things differently. She didn't react emotionally in most cases, preferring to take a step back and look at the larger picture before acting or stating an opinion and that was if she deemed it necessary to say anything at all. Steve reacted more emotionally before he would rein the emotion back into his control and proceed in a more calculating manner.

It was as she had said years before: they were merely two sides of the same coin.

"No," He shook his head, his hand tracing her arm in comfort, "no, you shouldn't have to apologize for that. And you're right…as much as I want to find him, it's not because I want to force him into anything, but to give him a safe space where he can take whatever time he needs. He didn't choose to enlist like I had thought and he certainly didn't ask to be experimented on…His life really didn't pan out the way he and I ever talked about and all I want is for him to have everything he could ever need. I forget sometimes that we have the same goal. The only difference is the approach, but I shouldn't assume you care less, that isn't fair of me and I'm sorry for that more than you could know." He sighed softly before continuing, "I forget sometimes that it's been so long for you…"

"I never moved on from him," She admitted, her voice shaking in the silence of his room, "I couldn't…I didn't even really think of needing anyone else – of wanting anyone else even if that meant I would go through the rest of time alone. It reminds me that I tend to be a hypocrite. How can I preach to others, that sometimes it's best to move on, when I can't move on myself?" Her words were weighted, the admission striking like a hammer on an anvil, "Sometimes, I loose myself and forget how much time has actually passed. I wonder how far apart events are in my life and I have to constantly remind myself of the date otherwise I fall into the cycle of fixating on singular moments. Does that make sense?"

"More than you realize it does. I know I'm not great at expressing everything that's on my mind and for that I'm sorry…" He drew off, his eyes staring at the ceiling above him and ignoring when she shifted and sat up slightly to look at him, "We promised we would stop repeating the past and that we wouldn't fall into the same pattern like we did in '45. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, Al, you've become the only person here I know I can trust. Don't get me wrong, everyone is great, but…"

"They expect you to be Captain America before they expect you to be Steve."

"Right."

They were quiet for a while; the only sound in the room was Alice's periodic sniffles as she settled back into him and practically wedged herself beneath him in an effort to warm herself up. This tended to be a frequent occurrence of late, given the colder months, but he was concerned for his friend suddenly – more so than usual. Alice had been having more and more nightmares of late and he knew she thought she was being careful to not let anyone realize it, but he had caught her more than once sneaking into the living room or the office in the apartment to distract herself or tire herself out enough so she could fall asleep. There were times when he would wake in the middle of the night to find her still awake and dressed in the same clothes from earlier that day that signified that she hadn't even bothered trying to sleep. The team had also become concerned when she had shown up to their last briefing with dark circles beneath her eyes and hollowed cheeks that betrayed her health. Tony had even begun to try and keep her occupied by giving her challenging engineering tasks that would work her overused mind enough to finally allow her to sleep to no avail. He then wondered if he could convince her to drink the same tea she made him drink in an effort to ease his mind. He was pulled from his thoughts when she shifted once more, her feet tucking beneath his leg when she curled her leg around his.

"I was in The Box again…" Her voice was broken as she whispered, almost as if she was afraid someone besides him could hear her. When he hummed questioningly she cleared her throat, shifting again, "it's where they kept me when they wanted to see how far they could push my mutation…to see what extent my mutation could heal."

"What happened?"

"I don't remember the particulars…just that I was in The Box and staring down at me was Pierce." He didn't need to look at her to know that her eyes were screwed shut and clenched tightly as her fist tightened around his t-shirt. "It was almost like my mind conjured The Box in the bank…Pierce was never there during the experiments when I was with Department K…he wasn't in S.H.I.E.L.D just yet nor do I think he was with HYDRA…but I could be wrong."

Steve shuffled her closer to him and she allowed him to move her into a more comfortable position, moving the blankets so they were tucked into her more tightly. As a super-soldier and because of the vita radiation used to activate the serum, Steve's body temperature ran higher than normal. When the two of them lived in Boston together in the few months following the Battle of New York, Alice had constantly joked that he was her personal heater and that he wasn't allowed to move before the weather warmed up because she refused to pay for the heating bill in the old apartment. He knew from her past nightmares that The Box played a large part into her trauma – the tiny room acting as a cooler of sorts and dropped to extreme temperatures. Alice had not needed to tell him that she had been stripped of any clothing during these tests as they were specifically monitoring her body's functions and that included the damage done to her skin. Because of The Box, the mutant despised the cold and even in the apartment at the tower, despite his OCD, he allowed her to leave her countless heavy cardigans and sweaters around, the garments finding home in random places in the event that she got a chill.

"But it was like…The Box was _in_ the bank and there was laughter…and then Bucky was there..."

"Breathe, Al…" He coached her quietly as she began to hyperventilate. "Breathe…"

"He was watching from the other side of the room…" She gasped, a whine leaving her lips as she tried to pull oxygen into her lungs. "There was nothing…nothing there and…then I was hearing the last argument we had and… _fuck_."

Steve sat up and pulled her with him, settling her between his legs and hugging her tightly to his chest. He had only ever had to do this once before and he knew that this would either help ground her or it would trigger other memories and so he knew this was a gamble. Thankfully, it appeared as if it was helping as her breathing – though still erratic and choppy – began to slow. "There you go…deep breath in and out, take your time…"

Alice had had many panic attacks before in her life, many of them appearing after her twenty years as an experiment as a twisted side effect from her undiagnosed PTSD. They always differed depending on what memory she was reliving and always started out as panic attacks before evolving into full panic, but for the most part when they appeared they made her body feel as if it had been submerged in ice – hence why she always sought out the warmest thing or person in the area (namely Steve). She knew she would eventually have to tell him how to properly manage her panic attacks this way they could avoid undue harm to either of them if she were to lash out suddenly in a fit of anxiety on top of the panic, but they hadn't had much time of recent to really discuss it. His arms, encircling her trembling and quaking form, helped her more in this case since they had already been speaking to one another and despite the pounding of her heart in her chest she couldn't force words around the tightness in her throat. Despite being freezing she could feel the sweat beading on her brow and she couldn't stop the whine that tumbled passed her lips as she buried her face in her hands, the action awkward as Steve was still holding her to him.

"Talk," She managed to choke out between gasps and shuddering that made her teeth chatter.

"What do you want me to talk about?"

" _Anything_."

"Alright," Steve found himself at a loss suddenly before he thought back to his youth, a memory playing before his eyes. "Did I ever tell you about how Bucky and I spent Christmas in my apartment one year with no heat?" He glanced down at the top of her head and seeing her shake it told him she hadn't heard the story. "Well, it was after my Ma passed away so it had to have been November or December of '36 when Bucky decided he was going to force his way into the apartment and became a part-time roommate of sorts. At the time I was still…well, small and I still got sick really easily and he was worried since Ma died of TB that I may or may not get it just out of dumb luck."

Alice closed her eyes as she focused on the cadence of his voice. The vibration of his speech rumbled around his chest and she could feel the echo of his voice against her back.

"Anyway, Buck's Ma at the time was constantly comin' over to check on me when he wasn't around and it was her idea to bring his sisters over one day while I was in class and decorate the apartment. They even managed to find a way to make a small tree so that we had a Christmas tree. It was easily the sweetest gift I ever got from them, besides the obvious anyway, and Bucky was so excited he spent part of his week's pay just to get us a decent meal – insisting that Christmas was as good a time as any to splurge." He chuckled, "Anyway, I think it was that night or the day of when we came back to the apartment and there was no heat at all. Bucky tried to get in touch with the lessor because no heat obviously meant frozen pipes and that was something I couldn't afford even with Bucky's help. I remember we sat in the kitchen with the stove on trying to keep warm. That idiot grabbed any available clothing or bedding in the place to try and keep me warm since he knew I'd get sick long before him."

Alice shivered, "Sounds like him."

"Yeah," The patriot sighed through his laugh, "Anyway we spent that night half in front of the stove and playing knucklebones. Bucky's Ma found us the next morning and nearly chewed our ears off for not just goin' to their apartment a few blocks away. Rebecca had a good laugh at our expense and found it even funnier when Bucky got sick and I didn't. A surprising first between the two of us since it seemed he could never get sick, and he'd had colds before, but he spent a week complaining that he was dying and that the women of New York would forget him if he was gone too long. Despite it being the first Christmas without my Ma there, it was probably my favorite."

"Is that why you like Christmas so much?"

"One of the reasons," she felt Steve shrug from where she had fully leaned back into him, "but nah – I like Christmas because nowadays there's a lot more going on. Yeah, I miss when it was more about family, but it's not all bad." He paused for a moment, glancing down at her. "How're you feeling?"

"Like I got hit by a bus a few times," She moaned slightly and resting her head back into his chest, her voice wavering. "I want cocoa so bad…" She choked out, a hand leaving the sanctuary of her layers and running down her damp skin. "I'm sorry I'm such a mess…"

"Stop apologizing for something that's not in your control, Allie," His words, while stern were accompanied by a smile that eased her slightly as she sunk bonelessly back into him. Steve nodded and shifted her once again so he could stand. "Can you walk or do you want a lift?" He watched her consider the options before she murmured a small _piggy back ride_ and he sat back on the edge of the bed to allow her to get into a comfortable position on his back. "Alright, hop on."

"Don't make this weird," She snorted despite the shakiness of her voice.

Steve smiled before hooking his hands underneath her knees and lifting her. The duo made quick work of exiting the bedroom only to stop in the entryway of the living room to see Sam lounging on the couch with a movie playing quietly in the background, his eyes staring blankly at the television screen. It appeared as if the entire apartment was dealing with some form of past-trauma that night and Alice patted Steve's back to signify she wanted to be dropped and he lowered himself at the quiet command and releasing her legs, allowing her feet to hit the ground. As Steve stood and had been about to ask if she wanted him to make the cocoa he found she was already meandering into the kitchen – her gait juddering from the nerves he was sure still wracked through her smaller frame – and pulling out the required items, the third cup did not miss his notice and while he nor Sam had said they wanted any they would never turn down her hot cocoa.

"Couldn't sleep?"

Sam looked up at him; his eyes refocusing as if he hadn't noticed the super-soldier or mutant enter the room. He took in Steve's relaxed pose before his eyes flashed to the mutant and seeing her layers understood that it was the smaller woman who had woken with nightmares. He didn't even blink when she snatched another cardigan from one of the stools, tugging it over the large hoodie she wore and he knew this one to be the largest she owned before holding her quaking hands over the burner on the stove. She soon exchanged her hands for the pot as well as a smaller one for herself for her preferred milk.

"Nah…woke up thinking I was under RPG fire again."

Steve's gaze was sympathetic as he sat on the couch, leaving enough space for Alice between them as he was certain she would wedge herself there regardless if there was room or not. It didn't take Steve much to place that the former Pararescuer had been dreaming of his time in Afghanistan and perhaps the death of his wingman and best friend Riley. "Do you wanna talk about it?"

Sam shook his head after a moment, the man running a hand down his face before sitting up and exchanging the DVD he had been watching to a different one – Steve recognizing it as a comedy that the former Pararescuer and Alice enjoyed – before sitting back in his original spot. "Nah…not yet. Maybe in the morning if I manage to get any sleep tonight…thanks man."

Steve smiled, "Of course."

Sam returned the smile as he readjusted himself into a comfortable position knowing that when the mutant woke from a nightmare she tended to either want copious amounts of space or she became obscenely clingy and given how she fluttered about the kitchen with an uneven and quaking gait he was certain she was going to be the latter that evening. Steve reached under the couch where a system of drawers had been installed by the handy mutant – Clint bringing them in randomly one afternoon and ignoring the questions of where they had come from as it seemed Alice had known all about it, thanking the archer enthusiastically and praising the craftsmanship and both men had assumed it had been Clint who had made them. Reaching inside he grabbed a few blankets and passing one to Sam as he rested the other three in his lap. Sam took the offered blanket with a small smile of gratitude.

After a few moments Alice returned with three mugs, passing them out silently and sandwiching herself in between Sam and Steve, tugging the super-soldier closer to herself so that she could steal his heat. She barely recognized when Steve adjusted the three blankets around her, taking a large sip of her coca and sighing softly. She had mastered hot cocoa on a stove and knew exactly how the boys liked theirs: Steve preferred whipped cream and candy cane crumbles (which she kept in a mason jar in the cabinet for him) and Sam preferred whipped cream and light sprinkling of cinnamon. With no words exchanged between them, Sam started the comedy that Alice briefly noticed to be _The Sandlot_.

The three hunkered in, finding comfort in each other as they began to follow the story of a group of kids finding friendships in the strangest of places all the while playing baseball. Steve had found himself tucked into the corner of the couch with Alice tucked next to him and half curled into his side and finally Sam sat on her other side with his head in her lap where he had rested his pillow no less than 20 minutes in – the mutant and former Pararescuer having fallen asleep half way through the movie. The patriot looked down at the two of them, the movie still playing in the background and he knew he didn't have the heart to wake them.

He sighed softly as he allowed his mind to wander.

Steve had never felt as if he belonged anywhere in his early life – constantly an outsider looking in, even within the Army he hadn't felt the same companionship and brotherhood that he had once craved so desperately and just finding it in the Commandos before his supposed death. Before he had known it, his life had changed and especially so when he decided that his only option was to put the Red Skull's plane into the Arctic ocean in an effort to prevent the world from ending. He could recall the feeling of hopelessness that had surrounded him and his final correspondence with Peggy. He had cried, knowing that he wouldn't be able to hold his promise to her, but he had felt peace in knowing that his death wouldn't be in vain.

As soon as the plane had hit the ice waters it had taken a considerable amount of time before the cockpit had filled with water. He had laid himself down on the ground, not far from the pilot seat, and stared up at the roof of the ship recounting the actions that had led him to his suicide mission. Steve didn't regret much in his life, however, he had regretted many things towards its seeming end: Bucky's death, his falling out with Alice, leaving the Commandos and finally leaving Peggy – easily his soul's mate – with a false promise after finally realizing that he should of asked her dancing sooner as she had loved him as much as he had loved her the entire time. He recalled his last thoughts as being ones of promise for the next life – hopes that he could be someone great, someone who was accepted better – who had true friends and someone who, no matter the odds, stood up for those who couldn't stand up for themselves. Glancing down at the woman who had curled into his chest, her breaths even and slow and then to the Pararescuer who had laid on his side, curled into the mutant's lap and holding her available hand, Steve promised himself that he would do whatever was within his power to keep his promises to them.

It was in that moment with his two friends curled on the couch and using him and each other as pillows that Steve Rogers promised himself, that while he would always love Bucky Barnes – the only person other than his immediate family to genuinely care about him – he could make room in his heart for a few more friends. And with that thought in mind, he allowed himself to close his eyes and relax, soft snores of his current roommates lulling him into sleep just as the end credits of the movie began to roll.

**-0-**

"I think you're being overdramatic," Alice pointed her spoon in the direction of Jodi Moore, who currently sat across from her in the small diner, the woman rolling her eyes in reply.

The mutant had just finished her exams and classes for the day and had agreed to meet Jodi for lunch before heading back to Avengers Tower. She had timed it so well that the former S.H.I.E.L.D agent hadn't had a choice but to agree as Alice was privy to the knowledge that Maria had a meeting with Pepper planned during the blonde agent's normal lunch hour. Jodi was dressed casually in well fitted jeans that clung to her shapely legs and a thick white turtleneck and matching boots. She had styled her hair in a loose top-knot with a few strands pulled from the array to frame her ovular face and she wore light traces of make up on her face, the brown eyeshadow highlighting the sharp grey of her eyes and the sharp crimson red of her lipstick bringing attention to the pout she currently sported. A black trench coat and cashmere scarf had been tossed in the corner of her side of the booth. Her style was very Parisian and Alice found herself admiring the woman's beauty and style – the women sharing fashion tips with one another over the last few months.

"I dunno what you want me to say here." The woman snorted her admission as she politely sipped at the water she had asked for, a mug full of tea that she ordered was set aside. Alice had found more humor in this considering Jodi had been appalled at the Lipton tea bag, glaring at it intensely as if it had offended her, before the British woman had moaned that she needed to find a way to get her hands on Ahmad Teas without waiting a long period for them as they were centered in London. She rested her fist against her cheek, her eyes tracking as the mutant played with her soup. "Since S.H.I.E.L.D fell I've got nothing better to do but hang around the tower and even then she's got her attention in other places."

Alice shrugged, "I don't know why you don't just ask her to hang out."

"Because she's still playing double agent with that gaggle out in Manhattan."

"You never thought to just…subtly ask to join in? You're a spy for god's sake woman!"

"Oh yeah," Jodi snorted, "I'll just walk right on up and be like: _Oh hey wanna go to the pub or go for a cuppa_? And I wasn't a spy," she stuck her nose up primly, "I was a language interpreter."

Alice stared at her for a moment, wondering if the agent was being serious or not before drawling a dry: "Yes. That's _exactly_ what you should do." When the British woman groaned softly and bit into her pastry, the mutant sighed, "I don't know how to say this any plainer, Jo. Maria is a busy woman, but I guarantee if you _ask her to hang out with you_ she'll find a way to make the time."

"You're a prat."

"A prat that you decided to come to for relationship advice and who happens to, also, be right."

Jodi rolled her eyes, sending another displeased glare at the tea she had been presented.

She had spent the early moments of the conversation loudly complaining about how every place she had been to recently served Lipton tea bags which wasn't the same as their iced tea and how it was blasphemous before launching into a long diatribe about how Tony had thought it was funny to leave British paraphernalia around the common room of the tower and especially when he knew Jodi was around. He had actually programmed Jarvis into playing _God Save the Queen_ whenever she entered his lab and the blonde had shot out at least half a dozen targets in the gun range in retaliation – not that it had actually done anything to Tony, but it had certainly made her feel better.

"You Americans are annoying."

"Keep in mind sweetheart, I was there when your country ruled over the colonies so..." She shrugged and offered a mocked wince that bore her teeth before a smirk began twitching at her lips earning a snorted laugh from Jodi for the effort. "Inappropriate jokes aside, you can always set it up where you get a group together to go with you…ones that you trust. It doesn't have to be the Avengers, but maybe some coworkers considering you work for Stark now."

"Please don't remind me," Jodi moaned into her hands, "I never hear the end of it. And Maria is kept so busy I dunno when I'll get to actually speaking to her."

"Well," Alice paused as she took another spoonful of soup, "I'm basically the Avenger's tech support for their missions since I'm in school and to be honest, I'd rather not be in the field if I can avoid it…y'know the whole _immortality_ thing is definitely harder to hide from with modern tech, but I can always use some help and I'm sure if you wanted I could arrange something with Tony to have Maria's job description focused to the Avengers." She smirked, "I mean, I don't know if it's possible, but I'd happily do it since I'm a sucker for a hopeless romantic."

Jodi glared at her, but her blush betrayed her annoyance and earning a wider smirk from the mutant, "You're an asshole."

"Just something to think about Jodi…but I'll spare you the embarrassment and talk about my classes, how about that?"

"I would love nothing more than to hear about _anything_ other than my love life."

Alice laughed before nodding her consent, "Noted."

"I thought I'd find you two here."

Jodi and Alice glanced to the end of their booth to notice Natasha and Alice immediately moved closer towards the window to make room for the former spy, the redhead gracefully sliding in after a small greeting from the blonde. Natasha was always fashionable, but she was a clothing thief by habit and the outfit she had deemed fitting for the cold January afternoon was a few different pieces that normally wouldn't match nor were they particularly fancy or stylish by any means – the woman clearly had been going for comfort as opposed to anything else. Currently she wore one of Steve's zip ups beneath a leather jacket and a pair of leggings that she had tucked into a pair of Alice's boots and what looked like one of Clint's henleys beneath the sweatshirt. She easily tugged off the beanie and scarf she had worn and releasing the curls that had been hidden beneath and tucking her gloves into her jacket pockets. As always, Natasha wore light make up specifically mascara and eyeliner and making her eyes pop. She turned her green eyes to Alice and nodding to the backpack that contained her laptop and textbooks.

"How was your test today?"

Alice shrugged slightly, spooning more soup onto her mouth before turning her body towards Natasha and briefly noticing Jodi flag down their waiter, "The neuroscience course is a joke. I've been studying the brain since World War II, but I've been considering doubling up at NYU to work prosthetics into my engineering from MIT. Software development is easy enough and computer engineering I've been technically doing on and off since the late 80s. The test was easy enough, but I'm more worried for my software pitch at the end of the month."

"I dunno why you'd be worried," Jodi sighed as she rested her cheek in her hand. "You're smart as a whip and you've got interesting ideas regarding how you could insert a chip into prosthetics that mimics neuropathways to send direct messages to the brain. A chip like that could do a lot of good for men and women who struggle with their injuries or even kids who have a hard time with birth defects."

"Yes, but I'm more worried about people weaponizing something like that."

"I don't see why. It's meant for prosthetics."

Natasha watched the back and forth between the two women before stealing Alice's untouched water and sipping at it. The mutant sighed softly, "It goes back to the idea that every piece of tech that comes out is normally always made with the best intentions. The chip that I'd want to manufacture for prosthetics deal specifically with the neuropathways in the brain that communicate with the rest of the body…now imagine someone like Pierce getting his hands on that or anyone with ill intentions. I'm not worried about getting the approval…I'm worried I won't be able to flush out those pieces within its programming to prevent people using the chip as a way to control people."

"Couldn't you choose something else?"

"I don't know…maybe? But I wouldn't know what to pitch for the thesis project and I've got maybe two more weeks until that deadline."

"What about the facial recognition software you've been working on?" Natasha questioned after giving her order to the waiter who had left almost as soon as he had shown up. "I know you're using it to find Barnes, but couldn't you base your project off of it?"

"No," Alice sighed and running a hand through her hair, glaring at the tips as she studied the awkward length. She made a mental note to text Clint later to see if he had time to help her fix and shape her hair. "Facial recognition software already exists and even then I don't want to make a more refined system when there are agencies in this world that already abuse that power. I'm sure I'll find something, but I want to make certain that it's not going to come back to bite me in the ass…maybe I can do something like a software that prevents most hackers from accessing most household systems. If I can make it similar in construct to Jarvis's firewall and anti-hack system maybe I can use that to make accessible to the average person – create a secure backup that would allow for people to safely store their information so that hackers on the deep web can't access it and steal their identities or something."

Jodi and Natasha shared a glance before the blonde snickered, "That's the most boring statement I've ever come out of your mouth."

"I think it's a great idea, Al," the redhead chirped almost sarcastically before taking a sip of the coffee she had ordered. Alice rolled her eyes at the both of them as they dissolved into giggles at her expense once again and forcing another spoonful of soup into her mouth. Was the idea a little more elementary compared to what the mutant knew she was capable of? Perhaps, but she also knew she had to be incredibly mindful of developing something that would tie to her name and she still wanted to maintain her autonomy and anonymity. After their laughter ceased, Natasha smiled over at the mutant, "Anyway, I actually came down here because Pepper is setting up a girl's night and she's recruited me to corral you two specifically into joining us."

"Corral us?"

Jodi snorted, "Yes, because somehow we've managed to dodge the last two."

The mutant shrugged noncommittally as she took a sip of her soda. Jodi rolled her eyes before returning her gaze to the redhead who had been served her own soup, "So what's the plan exactly? Movies, hair and painting each other's nails?"

"I'm not necessarily against that," Alice chirped as she scrolled through her phone, pausing suddenly and making a face before typing out what was surely a text message. The blonde rolled her eyes.

"No offense, but I'm not much for sleepovers."

"Well," Natasha hummed, "we were going to maybe do some of that stuff, but we're a bunch of grown women. Pepper knows that we've got training but she's planning on using Tony's credit card for food, booze and whatever else we need."

"I'm in."

Alice and Natasha shared a look before a smirk twitched at the mutant's lips, " _I'm not much for sleepovers_ my ass."

"I didn't realize all it would take is mentioning Tony's money."

"Are you actually surprised?" Alice snickered and sharing a humored glance with the Russian, "This is the only way Jo can actually get back at him."

"I am so, so tired," Jodi moaned, "of hearing _God Save the_ fucking _Queen_ every single time I walk into his lab or a conference room. Tell Pepper I'm in and I have suggestions."

Natasha smirked before turning her gaze to the mutant, her brow arched in silent question and earning a small sigh, "Count me in too…I have a shit load of work to do, but I guess taking a break isn't such an awful idea at this point."

The Russian's smirk stretched into a smile, "Good. I didn't want to have to explain to both Pepper _and_ Maria that you two were bailing…you both know how those two are especially when they decide to team up with one another."

"No different than how _you_ and Pepper are," Alice deadpanned, "you were her assistant for a time, fake or not."

The former spy merely shrugged her shoulders as she continued eating her soup, "Did you and Steve talk at all?"

Alice didn't offer her a glance as she played with her soup, "Yeah we spoke."

"And?"

"And _what_?" The mutant frowned, "Believe it or not, Steve and I don't go long without speaking to one another – we share the same apartment for god's sake."

The redhead shook her head, "That's not what I mean and you know it."

"We…came to an understanding of sorts," she sighed, defeated. "Bucky is our main priority, but we need to find a way to balance that priority without losing support within each other. It's not ideal, but trust me when I say that we were much worse in the 40s. Back then we weren't even remotely close to being friends and Bucky was the only thing that really held us together at all so looking back it wasn't a surprise that our friendship dissolved so quickly. Now, we've had time to understand one another…form a friendship without Bucky there. I don't think our friendship would end so quickly this time around."

"What happened in the 40s?" Jodi asked and taking a brief look at her face, Alice could tell her curiosity was genuine.

"After the mission to capture Arnim Zola, the Commandos returned to Paris, as London was too far out of the way for them at the time and the Allies were so very close to winning the war. I was still with the 107th and so I was stationed in Strasbourg as our company had been pressing the German line back and holding the French border. I had been granted leave and had decided to spend my leave in Paris where I was hoping to…reconcile with Bucky."

"Reconcile?"

"We had gotten into an argument…fight really, just before he had left for the mission in Switzerland and we hadn't had time to talk about it. There were a great many things said and most said in the heat of the argument that I certainly didn't mean." She sighed softly, her soup pushed away and forgotten, "Anyway, much of Paris still laid in rubble as their liberation was in late August and it was still early January at the time. I got to Paris where I was met by Gabe Jones and Dum Dum Dugan…they told me what had happened."

"You didn't even hear it from Steve?" Jodi frowned deeply, "That's horrible."

"It wasn't his fault," Alice sighed and running a hand through her loose hair, "he was grieving privately and I don't blame him for it. The way things were back then was different to how it is now. Emotions from commanding officers to lower ranks wasn't prohibited, but it was certainly frowned upon…despite the rest of their small group knowing what was happening, out of respect they said nothing and left Steve to his own devices."

Natasha sighed, "Sometimes I think it's a blessing and a curse that Steve is living in this era…" Jodi's gaze snapped to the former spy in confusion, but Alice merely nodded in understanding to the woman's sentiment. "Steve's incredibly sensitive and it's not necessarily frowned upon for men to express what they feel anymore despite the stigma still out there."

"That's definitely true," Alice smiled, "he had always been sensitive despite the mask he tried to wear. I genuinely believe that that was the very reason why he and Bucky were such good friends, to be perfectly honest. Bucky always encouraged Steve to say how he was feeling and Steve always encouraged Bucky to be fearless." She shook her head, "Anyway, I sought him out and we got into an argument…a heated one where we accused each other of awful things and we said truly disgusting things to one another. I left – barely spoke to Dugan or Jones on my way out, merely wishing them and the Commandos the best and exchanging brief information with Morita and how he could reach me should he need more information on emergency medicine before requesting a transfer. Phillips, I think, understood and felt guilty to some degree and transferred me to 80th Field Hospital that was accompanying the U.S. 106th in the heart of Germany."

"And then you met Erik…"

"I did," She sighed softly earning a confused look from Jodi.

"Erik? Who's Erik?"

Alice offered her a humored smile, "You'd probably know him better as Magneto."

"As in the crazy mutant that doesn't give two shits if he kills people?"

"Crazy mutant or not," The mutant deadpanned and earning a wince from the former agent, "he wasn't always like that. He was a survivor at Auschwitz and a survivor of experimentation."

Natasha's brow suddenly creased, "It sounds to me like he was the first one to know about you being a mutant…"

"He was – though we didn't know what to call one another back then. Erik had suffered untold atrocity and letting him know he wasn't alone was the only way to gain any semblance of trust with him. His mother was murdered in front of him to trigger his powers and his reward was to be turned into an unwilling experiment. He was sick and wounded and needed help – as a nurse I couldn't in good consciousness let him suffer and especially since he was merely a child at the time." She sighed softly, hands playing with the straw in her cup, "he tried recruiting me to the Brotherhood back in the 80s when he learned what had happened to me, but I wanted nothing to do with _anyone_ and I turned him down pretty fast…every once and a while I hear from him or someone in the Brotherhood asking me to join up with them, but I can't justify it…not truly."

"So when you were forced to join S.H.I.E.L.D…"

"It certainly didn't help my opinions in human organizations, that's for sure." She shrugged suddenly, a smirk curling at her lips, "though, I have to admit, that I like the arrangement we've all got going on now."

"Well, that's a relief," the former spy smirked, "I'd hate to be holding you against your will."

The two women shared a humored look before the conversation changed; the three women spoke of mundane things before Alice flagged down their waiter for the check and slapping a few bills into the check presenter and leaving a tip, the three making their way back to Avengers tower. The walk wasn't long, Alice squeezing herself between the taller women in an effort to use them as shields to the cold breeze and sighing in relief as soon as they hit the lobby and the warm air beat against her. The three stepped into the elevator and as soon as they did Natasha turned to the mutant.

"Meet in the training room in thirty minutes?"

"Sounds like a plan," Jodi smirked as she eyed the mutant who had been about to open her mouth, no doubt to rebuke the time, her smirk widening when Alice's mouth snapped shut and she merely nodded. As they came to the training floor Jodi and Natasha shared an amused smirk before waving cheerfully to the mutant as they disembarked, leaving her in the elevator which she was meant to take to her apartment to change.

As Alice stepped off the elevator and began the trek down the hallway she heard the music long before she entered and she hadn't been expecting the scene that greeted her. An obscure movie score blared from the living room speakers and inside she found Sam, Clint, Steve and Thor spread out and standing on different pieces of furniture with a very overly excited Rumsfeld leaping between them, all dog smiles and tail wagging so hard the mutant thought he may gain enough traction to take off.

"Alice!" Sam cried his greeting with arms thrown wide and a grin stretching across his face, "Don't just stare at me! The floor is lava!"

Clint sent her a wave with his fingers, cheeks flushed and his other hand twirling a drumstick, Thor merely sent her a wide smile of his own in greeting and Steve looked torn between amusement and confusion, cheeks flush and Alice's eyes darted to the center table to see an arrangement of various bottles of alcohol and her brows furrowed.

"Are you all drunk?"

"Of course not!" Sam crowed before grinning stupidly at her again, "maybe just a little."

"Oh my god…"

"It was completely Thor's fault."

The Asgardian looked both affronted and deeply amused as he raised his glass to her, "Come and join us! Son of Will is teaching Cap, Hawk and myself a new game with drinks!"

"Sweet Jesus have mercy," Alice groaned to herself despite her amusement. "I can only assume you brought some special Asgardian stuff for just this occasion?"

Thor sent her a sweet smile, "Of course!"

She shook her head with a smirk tugging at her lips, "As much as I would _love_ to join you – and believe me I'd much rather be playing…whatever it is you're all playing and drinking – but Nat and Jodi are expecting me on the training deck in…" she flicked her arm, exposing her watch and frowning at it, "20 minutes. I promise to join you next time!" She quickly made her exit, ducking into her room and closing the door so she could change. She had workout clothes in her locker on the training level, however, she was going to use the next few minutes to put her things away and maybe sneak back into the kitchen to watch more of the boys' game.

Changing quickly she tugged on a pair of leggings and a fitted long sleeved crop top before snatching her foot and hand wraps from their drawer in her dresser and leaving her room for the kitchen. She briefly ignored as the boys continued to play whatever version of _the floor is lava_ they were currently playing, instead she reached into the refrigerator and pulled out one of her premade smoothies, leaning casually against the breakfast bar and watching their game. It took her quite some time to figure out what they were actually playing and when she did she nearly doubled over in laughter. She had coerced Sam into watching _New Girl_ with her in exchange for watching _Voltron_ and for as much as he grumbled about it, to see him attempting to teach the three blondes how to play _True American_ made her entire afternoon. It was clearly a different version of the game that would allow the patriot, archer and Asgardian the opportunity to actually be able to understand the game, but she suddenly wondered how mad Natasha and Jodi would be if she skipped training that afternoon.

"Why do I have to go all the way out here if I can just take a cup here?

" _Steve_ ," Sam heaved an exasperated sigh, "you act like I've never taught you how to play Candyland!"

Alice's brow arched in amusement at the disgruntled look that crept onto Steve's face, "You showed me how to play _once_ , that's definitely not enough times to understand why I have to go so far out of the way when I got the answer right to begin with!"

"Thor's got it and he's not even _American_ ," Clint sung with a smirk and earning a glare from Steve.

"He's from another planet!"

"Realm, actually." the God of Thunder supplied helpfully and taking another sip of his drink; still clearly not understanding the rules of the game, but enjoying it all the same. "I'm from another realm."

"That's not the point," Steve grumbled.

Alice snickered quietly to herself as she reached for the pad of paper that always seemed to find its way back onto the breakfast bar and quickly drawing the diagram for the game and writing out a list of rules. She fluttered around the kitchen looking for highlighters and crying in triumph when she found them and drawing the attention of the four men in her living room.

"What're you doin' over there, Pidge?"

She ignored the nickname, outlining the diagram in alternating colors to show the different areas and scribbling the rules of the game down before practically skipping to the four men. "This should help." She handed her diagram and written rules to Steve who glanced at it briefly before handing it off to Thor and Clint. Alice knew with the serum coursing through his veins, Steve that he could retain information with a mere glance and knew that her diagram would stick much easier. Thor and Clint studied the diagram before dropping it onto the table where it wouldn't get ruined and Sam sent her a dazzling smile.

"You sure you can't stick around?"

"I show up to training half-drunk you know Nat will have my ass," She snickered, waving the smoothie for him to see. "Besides, I've got to finish this on the way down."

"Your loss!"

"Also I probably won't be back tonight," She informed them after taking another large sip from her cup and earning quirked brows at her declaration. "Apparently, Pepper and Maria are putting together a _girls night_ of sorts and I've been roped into going."

"Oh, okay. We're probably gonna try and convince Tony and Bruce to join," Steve informed her with a small smile and a shrug. "If you're all having a bonding experience maybe we could do the same."

"Sure," Alice smirked, "remind me to lock my door then."

"See ya later Kit!"

Alice waved to the boys and stepped out of the apartment, jogging to the elevator and checking her watch; if she was lucky she would make it just in time for her training session. While in the elevator, Alice began rolling out her shoulders and stretching her arms at the very least as she knew the Russian and British woman would not spare her any injury as their goal was specifically to push her to a point where she could control her mutation to either hold off healing or heal immediately with a mere thought. The former spy and mutant had been training as such for the last few months and Alice had developed her mutation enough (with the sensors she, Bruce and Tony had developed to collect the data that they would go over when she was available) that she didn't have to draw energy from different parts of her body just to heal. It certainly made her a more formidable opponent and she knew that it would scare her enemies senseless and she planned to test that with Wade soon enough. Shaking the thought from her head she stepped into the gymnasium and immediately made for the case that held the sensors she would need to track her mutation and fixing them to the appropriate vital areas.

"You ready?"

She turned immediately to see Natasha standing there, dressed in a tank and leggings, her hands already wrapped and ready to go before she offered the former spy a smile, "Just about. Just gotta secure these and then we're good. What's the first order today?"

Natasha smirked, "You're gonna try and fend off two opponents today. I'd ask Clint, but he didn't answer his phone."

"He's in my apartment with Steve, Sam and Thor playing _True American_." She shrugged, sliding her newly improved impact gloves onto her hands and doing the same with her feet. "Thor snuck more Asgardian juice into the tower."

"Thor's here?"

Both Avengers turned to look at Jodi who had just appeared in her own workout clothes consisting of capri leggings and a t-shirt before Alice nodded and smirked, "I doubt we're gonna be bothered by the boys tonight unless their game gets too rowdy."

"Lord, help us if it does."

Natasha shook her head before gesturing to the boxing ring, "Well we're on a time schedule today, ladies. Let's get to it."

**-0-**

Alice limped her way into the elevator just behind Natasha with Jodi following behind her, her eyes narrowing at the smug redhead as she cheerfully hit the button that would lead them to the penthouse. The three women had already showered and changed into their respective clothes and dressed whatever wounds needed to be seen to – Alice holding an ice pack to her swollen cheek after walking into a spinning hook kick from the Russian and fracturing her cheekbone. Jodi glanced between the two friends with her hand covering her smile as she attempted to remain polite, but the Russian was preening delightfully, but it wasn't because of her successful connect during sparring – no, it had been what happened afterwards.

"You don't have to look so smug about it all."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Sure you don't."

"I really don't."

"Is that why my only change of pants were missing?"

Jodi snorted as she listened to the banter between the two women, her eyes scanning the outfit that Alice now wore and coughing to cover another laugh. It was no secret that those who were Avengers or close to the Avengers knew the mutant despised wearing athletic ware outside of the gym, unless they were sweatpants or track pants, and the only clothes that had been waiting for the smaller woman when they returned to the locker room was a pair of leggings that had the word _Wonderland_ running down the solid side of the leg in galaxy print with a Cheshire cat logo at the top and the other leg a tie-dye menagerie of blues, purples and bleach splotches that were meant to mimic stars. Alice had not been amused at the split leggings especially when they clashed with the rest of her outfit. Natasha had then prevented her from returning to her apartment which had done nothing to improve the mutant's mood.

"I think they suit you, besides this is supposed to be fun…why not dress for it?"

"If you didn't already fracture my cheek I'd drop kick you on principle alone."

Natasha's eyebrow arched teasingly, "Big words for someone who got her ass kicked."

"That's the whole _point_ of our training, Nat!"

"Someone's a sore loser," Jodi snickered, high fiving Natasha behind the mutant's back and earning a glare from the brunette as well as a middle-finger solute.

The three women stepped out of the elevator and into the penthouse to see that Maria and Pepper had already begun setting up the bar and without prompting; the brunette made for the bar and grabbed the nearest bottle before taking a swig and glaring at Natasha and Jodi who sauntered behind her with wide smirks on their faces. Maria and Pepper shared a look before the strawberry blonde's brows furrowed, "What're you wearing?"

"Why don't you ask Nat and Jo…they seem to be perfectly okay with me looking like an angsty teenager shopping at the Hot Topic or wherever kids shop nowadays."

"You're certainly fitting the description," Jodi laughed as she took the offered drink from Maria as she took in the mutant's attire. "Besides if you want to be a part of the growing times you've gotta at least learn some of the fashions."

"Not my fault the fashion of this day and age is shoddy at best," The mutant grumbled. "Don't get me wrong, when women were allowed to wear trousers I was never happier, but these pants are impractical…and they show too much."

"You wear a leotard, Kevlar and spandex super suit!"

"At least it's _thicker_ and won't show off what I don't wanna show off!"

"You've got great shape, Alice," Maria intoned wisely with a smirk hidden by her own glass of alcohol. "That and leggings are much more comfortable and allow for more flexibility."

The mutant grumbled incoherently before making her way to one of the couches and stripping it of the throw and tucking it around her lap. The other women grabbed various drinks and snacks and made their way over as well, Natasha tossing herself onto the couch next to Alice and resting her head in her lap and smiling up at the brunette when she shot her a raised eyebrow in question. Maria, Jodi and Pepper took up positions around the other sectional and began loudly discussing their day while the mutant and former spy merely listened. It wasn't long before the alcohol was beginning to hit some of their systems when Maria suddenly shot up from her couch, holding her drink aloft and looking at the four women now staring at her.

"I've got an amazing idea," She began before racing towards the elevator.

"Would you like to share with the class or are you gonna leave us in suspense?"

Maria shot her middle-finger up at the mutant who snickered in reply before tapping Natasha to sit up before following after her before the other women could figure out what she was doing. She stuck her tongue out when Natasha and Jodi cried out as they realized Alice had every intention of returning to her apartment to change and laughed as the elevator shut behind her. Maria quirked a brow before smirking at her pants.

"Changing?"

"Absolutely."

"Aren't the guys in your apartment?"

"Most definitely," Alice answered with a smirk before looking up at the woman slightly, "and are you gonna tell me what you're grabbing from your office?"

"Maybe."

"Just maybe?"

"Just maybe," Maria smirked before gesturing the woman to her floor where they both distinctly heard the men shouting back and forth at each other over what sounded like techno? Maria and Alice shared a look with one another before they shrugged at one another and the blue eyed woman offered the mutant a smile, "Good luck!"

Alice waved her away as the elevator doors shut behind the woman and started towards her apartment, sliding in the front door and ignoring the men as she quickly tried to dart down the hallway before any of them saw her.

"Hold it right there, Wonderland."

Alice turned briefly, glancing back at Tony and quirking her brow in question, "Um…yes?"

"The hell are you doing down here?"

"I'm pretty sure this is _my_ apartment," she snorted in reply, crossing her arms over her chest. "If you must know I'm changing into my pajamas."

"I need you to settle an argument."

"Can it wait _5 minutes_ for me to change?"

"It's urgent."

"Fine," Alice moaned exaggeratedly, "I'll be out in two!" Without waiting for the response she darted into her bedroom and immediately stripping of her leggings. She stared at them distastefully before tossing them across the room and near where her laundry basket was hidden in her open closet (she had removed the doors just out of preference and style as she had recently become rather obsessed with Pinterest in recent years) before tugging on a pair of light grey track pants and exchanging her long sleeved shirt for an oversized red mock-turtleneck sweatshirt. She wasted no time in tugging her hair into a low bun as she exited her room and unsurprisingly Tony was waiting for her. "Now what's going on?"

"You lived during the Revolution right?"

Alice blinked owlishly at him for a few moments before her eyes narrowed, "Obviously…why?"

"Which Founding Fathers did you know?"

At this point the two of them had made it back into the living room where the music had been turned down slightly as to hear the conversation between the two. Alice's brow arched, though her suspicion did not settle – in fact, it only became worse when she took in the faces of her male teammates. They ranged from intrigued to smug and she wasn't certain which was worse.

"I'm still not understanding what this disagreement is about."

"Well, I'm so glad you asked," Tony chirped and tossing an arm around her shoulders that had the woman's brow arching higher and disappearing beneath her recently trimmed fringe, "because Clint here wagered that you probably know more dirt about our Founding Fathers than most people and while I agree, _he_ seems to think that mac'n'cheese is _not_ American AND that these men were actual idiots."

"It isn't." Alice drawled slowly. "It's actually an Italian dish that was made popular in the colonies because of Thomas Jefferson." Tony's jaw seemed to unhinge in shock as if he had personally been wronged by the statement, everyone ignoring Clint's cheer of triumph. "And yes, our Founding Fathers were idiots…I knew many of them during the war."

"It's Italian?" Sam paused.

Steve looked affronted, the alcohol Thor had smuggled into the tower clearly lowering his inhibitions, "They were idiots?"

"I _told_ you guys!"

"Do you know what's happening?"

"Not a clue," Bruce staged whispered back to Thor who had asked the question.

Tony stared at the mutant for another moment before frowning, "I don't know whether to be upset that I lost the wager or concerned about the birth of our nation."

"Short story, he was our diplomat to France and lived there for almost the entirety of the Revolution. Mac'n'cheese, while popular in Europe – France especially – it traces back to 13th century and was originally called _de lasanis_. It was _basically_ lasagna without the tomato sauce. Anyway after visiting Italy he brought a pasta maker back to the colonies and served it at every function he had whenever he could." She shrugged, "Washington actually had to ban snacks during cabinet sessions because Jefferson would constantly eat it and the other members found it disgusting. Don't get me wrong…our Founding Fathers were some of the greatest thinkers of that time…but these are also the same men and a people who thought tomatoes were poisonous."

"Oh wow…"

"Does that answer your questions?"

"Sure."

Alice smiled and wiggled her fingers in a wave as she practically skipped out of the door and ignoring the loud voices that seemed to be carrying on the argument before making her way back to the Penthouse. Once there she grabbed another drink from the bar and sat herself back on the couch, not protesting when Natasha substituted the pillow she had been using for the mutant's lap. The women continued talking to one another aimlessly before Maria returned with a deck of cards clutched in her hand. All of them had been dressed down in various pajamas – everyone seemingly have taken the opportunity to change while Alice and Maria had disappeared.

Maria wore a lavender henley tee with her hair down and waving wildly from the braid she had had it in previously and donning a pair of slippers and matching pants. Jodi had changed into a pair of plaid pajama pants and what appeared to be a University sports sweatshirt with her hair tugged into a top-knot and her face still baring her full makeup. Natasha had changed into a pair of what looked like Clint's sweatpants and one of Steve's zip-ups, socks pulled over her feet and finally Pepper had changed into what looked like one of Tony's band tees and pajama shorts. Pepper was pouring another round of drinks, Jodi reclined in her spot on the wrap around couch and Maria seating herself at the coffee table and shuffling the cards in her hand and as they did this the women had begun speaking about men in their lives – or women in Jodi's case as she had easily told the gathered women at one point or another that she preferred women over men over the last few months or years of knowing each one of them – as well as missions they had gone on in the past. The conversation had circled around to Alice who had divulged a story about when she had first met Logan, though these women knew him better as Wolverine.

"Didn't you say something about beating the shit out of him?" Jodi questioned around the lip of the beer she had chosen after declining the third cocktail Pepper had offered her as Alice shrugged noncommittally. The strawberry-blonde's brow arched as a smirk tugged at the corners of her mouth.

"I'm surprised you didn't kill him."

"Not possible," Alice shrugged again as she took another sip of her drink, her cheeks flush with alcohol and her body feeling pleasantly warm. "Logan and I share similarities in that our bodies heal near instantaneously. His bones are also fused with adamantium and I'd rather get hit by a bus than be on the receiving end of that man's punch…claws aside. Besides, too easy and he's actually not as surly as you'd think when you get to know him."

"Didn't you sleep with him?"

Alice stared down at Natasha with a deadpanned look, "I tell you something in confidence and you go and ruin it."

"WAIT!" Pepper choked as Maria and Jodi merely stared openly at the mutant, "You _slept_ with him!?"

"I'm two hundred and sixty two, Pepper, I'm not dead," Alice drawled, her tone dry though amusement tugged at her features. "I've slept with plenty of men throughout the years, but yes, I've slept with Logan before he was part of the X-men…I want to say it was sometime during 1862 – maybe 1863 – and we had an on-again-off-again relationship. We learned early on that we had a lot in common and went through some wars together before eventually calling it quits in 1902, though we stayed friends with one another."

Maria dealt the cards, shaking her head, "I can't believe you slept with him."

"I can't believe you think going to the mall is fun, _Sparkles_."

"OH MY GOD!" Maria cried as she stared at the mutant in horror, the woman merely taking another sip of her drink and not looking at all apologetic, "That was _classified_!"

"Not according to Natasha it isn't," Pepper snickered before clinking glasses with Jodi who continued to watch in amusement and Natasha merely smirked from where she was lounging in the mutant's lap. "But did he always have that weird muttonchops look?"

It took a moment for Alice to place the question that the strawberry-blonde asked before laughing, the sound nervous to her own ears, her hand seeking Natasha's in an effort to stem the emotion slightly as she felt the beginnings of an anxiety attack. The Russian wasted no time in lacing their fingers and squeezing to help ground the mutant and she glanced down at the redhead, her expression while pinched showed her gratitude.

"Yeah, though back then his hair was longer and didn't have that weird spiked halo he seems to prefer now," She shrugged before taking a quick sip of her alcohol before passing it down to Natasha as she was closer to the table, the woman placing it on the table and allowing Alice to play with the ends of her hair in an effort to stem the shaking of the appendage. If the other women noticed Alice's sudden anxiety they didn't comment and instead began to play a round of rummy.

"So," Jodi began, changing the subject, " _Sparkles_?"

Maria groaned, "It was a mission I had when I first joined S.H.I.E.L.D and I haven't been able to fully shake it." When Jodi and Pepper shot her expectant looks she sighed deeply. "Robin Scherbatsky…the _real_ Robin Scherbatsky is part of a witness protection program. Fury was concerned she would become a security risk and after realizing she and I had an uncanny likeness he sent me in to act as her in hopes to find out if she was _still_ a security risk. A year ago she was cleared and they sent her back to Canada, but I was in deep and the friends that I made through being her was nice to not have tied to S.H.I.E.L.D and Fury never told me to cut ties so, I still play as Robin when I'm around them."

"It's always nice to have friends outside of work," Pepper agreed with a knowing smile. "Unfortunately, mine all happen to be connected to the Avengers in some way shape or form."

"As soon as you agreed to work for Stark you signed your life away," Jodi snorted with a smirk and earning a mocked look of annoyance from Pepper.

As Alice looked around at the group of gathered women she couldn't help the small smile that twitched at her lips, Natasha's fingers wrapped in her own and grounding her and her hair sliding through the mutant's fingers. She had never had many friends even as a child and though she still had flashes of insecurity where she wondered if she clung too tightly or if her newly formed family actually liked her, she resolved to never take their friendship and love for granted. It was difficult for her to form connections because the lives of those around her seemed to expire in a blink, but as she allowed herself to follow the guidance of people like Clint, Natasha, Laura, Steve and Sam she found that it was okay to be weak to allow others to pick up the slack and be her strength. And as she sat back and watched the women she knew she could count among her friends, Alice allowed herself to relax for the first time in months and put her worries aside to deal with on another day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **End Note:** Well, there we have it folks! I thought after the last chapter we needed a break from anything main plot or anything to do with the search for Bucky, but I can assure you we'll be back and at it in the next chapter and then we're onto Age of Ultron! We're getting close here everyone and I'm so excited for you all to see how everything unfolds...
> 
> Also, yes, Alice has had relations with a few different people throughout her life and Logan is one of them, haha!
> 
> I wanna touch on and say that as a fandom I think we were all really rocked by the passing of Chadwick Boseman. I legitimately sobbed when I read the news (I found out by way of Chris Evans' instagram and it took me a few minutes to really understand what I was reading), I hadn't cried that hard for an actor's passing since Robin Williams. So, as I move forward in this story, and because I want to make sure I truly honor his legacy with his performance in Black Panther/Infinity War/Endgame, I will be asking that anyone with intimate knowledge of African culture or the Black Panther comics please PM me any information you would like to see me add into the story or things you picked up while watching the movie. I ask this because there will be a point in this story where we get to see Bucky living in Wakanda and I want to make sure I remain respectful to the legacy and culture that's been established for us. Thank you all in advance!  
> Thank you all for your continued support of this story and I will see you all in the next chapter~!
> 
> If you haven't read simmerandcry's Bucky/OC/Steve story: Show Me, Don't Tell Me, why? You should go read it, you won't regret it ;)
> 
> All the love friends~
> 
> xoxo EirlysLavellan
> 
> Chadwick Boesman  
> A hero and a legend, may you rest in peace King


	22. Let the Games Begin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back! Just a quick thank you to both **simmerandcry** and **Blondegal99** for sending me some kudos! I can't thank you enough! xoxo
> 
> Now on to the chapter ;D

_As the Sky May Fall_  
_Deadpool_ **/|\** _Age of Ultron_  
_22_

* * *

**** TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS MENTIONS OF MISCARRIAGES AND CHILDBIRTH AND GENERAL DEADPOOL SHENANIGANS. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION ****

* * *

**Mid-February 2015**

Wade Wilson watched as the other mutant meandered her way around his work space before stopping in front of the Kiviat diagram he had of his targets in his search for Francis Freeman, her eyes tracing the lines that connected the villainous mutant to his known associates including the mutant known as _Angel Dust_. Alice had taken time over the last few weeks to help narrow down the targets he would need to hit and he had been dutiful in taking them out swiftly.

"You're fast, I'll give you that," She hummed as her eyes followed the chart, her hand cupping her chin from where her elbow rested against her crossed arms.

She was already donned in her Kevlar and spandex cat-suit, the hood resting against her shoulders and hanging down her back, the metal levers that rested beneath her ears housing her mask; though her face was open save for the fringe that fell from her tightly braided hair. She had shown up at what he had begun calling his _Deadhut_ already decked out in her _Override_ suit – a suit that was different shades of black and charcoal gray with purple highlights – and offering a wide grin at his roommate. Over the last few weeks of them partnering up they had taken four HYDRA bases (two separate cells in Mexico, one in Kuwait and one in France) and she had helped him take out two of the seven men working for Francis (one who suspiciously looked like Ice Cube and another who had a suspicious amount of Soviet paraphernalia) – her work for the Avengers had kept her overly busy for a good portion of their alliance, but she had made it up to him by supplying him names and locations for each of his victims. In that time, she and Blind Al had become rather well acquainted much to his chagrin.

Wade snorted, pulling on his own suit and fastening the belts and holsters into the appropriate places – he knew better than to try and get a rise out of the older mutant by stripping and redressing in front of her as she had done so many times and maintained eye contact…he admired her unmitigated cheek. The two of them had come to an understanding in their short partnership and that was that the older mutant, while normally maintaining a certain level of modesty, had a very gray moral compass. She wasn't afraid to kill anyone so long as she knew for certain that they were a direct problem and Wade could respect that about her and it also helped that she was never offended by his acerbic sarcasm and jocular wit – it also helped that she never seemed to acknowledge or care that he spoke to himself and the audience.

"Yeah, well the sooner the better. I want that fucker to make me hot again…I look like Tony Stark's literal asshole."

She merely glanced at him and he almost questioned the weight to her expression before she shrugged, "Alright. Any of your mercenary contacts come through about who our shadow's been?"

"Zip, nada, zilch."

"Wonderful."

"Besides," Wade chirped, "it's just a tiny bit of foreshadowing to help move the plot along~!"

The two-time-centenarian shot him a deadpanned look, ignoring his fourth wall break, "Did you finally manage to grow a set and talk to Vanessa or are you still stalking her at the strip joint?"

"Fuck you, Macklemore." Her answering laugh told him she hadn't taken offense to his acerbic comment. The two of them got on like a house on fire, though he had been desperately trying to get her to curse more. "So, you find out who the next fucker we're hitting is? Cause the last guy I stabbed didn't have too many answers."

"His name is Lucas Cabello." She answered, flicking her wrist and bringing a picture of him up on the screen of her bracer, her hands tapping along it and projecting it upwards with a flick of her fingers so he could see it clearly. "He's a Capricorn who enjoys harassing children at ice cream trucks, driving by schools at odd hours in a panel van and playing hockey with the boys on the weekends," She chirped with a grin twitching at the corner of her mouth. "And let's not forget pushing drugs – including the serum that Ajax seems to enjoy pumping into unknowing prisoners of the new Weapon X sector. Guess everyone needs a hobby. Oh, and he apparently has a thing for powdered donuts and that's _not_ polysemic."

"You mean he doesn't like snorting cocaine around a chick's nipple?" He glances directly at _**you**_ the reader, "What a waste of a good time and cocaine!"

Alice shrugged, "Maybe, but no…he has a literal thing for the sugary dough shaped in a circle. Like," she pulled up an image that appeared to be from a surveillance feed that showed him buying copious amounts of boxes from a Krispy Kreme, "I mean a literal thing for the donuts. Looking at his bank statements alone has been both enlightening and terrifying."

"What bad guy takes super money earned through terrible means and makes it so innocently delicious!?"

"If it's comforting or clarifying at all his nationality is listed as Canadian."

"Oh stop that smile right now; you look like the Cheshire-fucking-cat."

"Well," She hummed with a smirk dancing across her lips as she tapped a few more buttons and projecting more of the man's information, "you're Canadian right? Figured you two would be two birds of a feather or, ya know, at the very least two dudes who enjoy hockey sticks and knocking a small discus on ice…I never got why hockey was so popular. Is it like baseball where it's like a national pastime?"

He pointed the knife he had been playing with at her in retaliation, "That's not nice – taking shots at my country. Aren't you an original conqueror or whatever?"

"Born and raised in the colonies and daughter of a Scottish-immigrant actually…you'd have to focus on a few other countries before mine." She snickered, unbothered by the threat of the knife, "Anyway, he likes to frequent this ice rink out in Newburgh and stays late in the office to do work for Ajax…figures the feds won't trace it back to him if he uses a business computer." She shrugged before tapping the bracer a few more times and pulling up what looked like another surveillance feed. "If we leave now, we can get there in about two shakes."

"Only if I get to hit him with a Zamboni."

"How dare I try to impede your new Canadian tradition? Besides, death by Zamboni sounds hilariously droll compared to your other methods," she drawled sarcastically. "Maybe we can create a new sport…NASCAR but make it Zambonis!"

"I hate you…so much."

"No you don't~" She sing-songed as she dismissed the projection of their target. "Besides, I wanna sing _Oh Canada_ while you do it."

"Fuck you and your _Blade of Marmora_ -looking suit."

"Is that supposed to be a Voltron joke?"

"Oh, you actually get that reference."

She snorted, "No. Roommate is a real fan though. Much more of a _Mighty Morphing Power Rangers_ fan instead."

He gasped loudly as if offended, "How dare you shit in my _Voltron_ -church!"

Alice rolled her eyes in reply before gesturing to the door, "Since you started blaspheming in my _ThunderCats_ -church last Saturday. Shall we oh, Legendary Defender, sir or do you need your other rings to create a super-bot?"

"You're an asshole, just thought you should know, Macklemore."

She groaned loudly, "Just because it's become a trend to thrift clothes doesn't mean _I_ do. Most of these clothes are ones I've had in my closet for at least thirty years give or take a few decades considering I was being stabbed with needles for at least two of them."

"Sure thing…doesn't change the fact that I'll forever call you Macklemore…" His voice was sickingly sweet and Alice scoffed at him, tossing him his katanas and nodding to him as she swept out of the area. Just as he closed the door to the room, he noticed Alice stop over to Al and offer her a quick hug.

"Don't worry, Al, I'll make sure he brings back plenty of non-illicit drugs to hide for you."

"Bitch."

"I know," She grinned before pressing a kiss to the old woman's cheek. Al snorted at her with a smirk before glancing his way and sighing.

"Try not to die this time. Your blood makes this whole place smell like a slaughterhouse."

"Certainly overpowers the sad-sex smell and unicorn juice – I thought it was an improvement!"

Alice covered her mouth to stifle her laughter and earning her an award-winning smile from the mercenary. Al merely frowned at him before shrugging, "You're not wrong…still beats the smell of old cigarettes and mold."

"That's the couch we picked up last Tuesday," Wade chirped before pecking the woman's cheek and like the dangerous whirlwind of energy that he was, he snatched Alice's arm and danced towards the door and throwing a flamboyant wave behind him towards the blind woman as he did, "Don't put together the Hurdal until I get back!"

"Bye Al!"

"Piss off –"

The door closing behind them cut off anything else the elderly woman was saying as Wade all but pranced towards the street with Alice in tow. She remained silent as she allowed him to drag her along and sighing softly as she pulled the large hood of her suit onto her head and cracking her neck. The two walked half way up the street in shadows before the mercenary finally stopped and looked at her.

"How're we getting to Newburgh?"

Alice smirked, "I was waiting for you to ask. C'mon, I managed to borrow her from a used car lot."

Wade nearly squealed in joy as he skipped after her, "Never thought we'd be committing grand theft auto with this partnership! Why didn't you tell me!?"

"Thought it'd make a great surprise, cupcake."

"Oh, buttercup, you shouldn't have!"

Alice hid a smile as she gestured him to the passenger seat of the Nissan Altima she had hotwired for the occasion as she slid into the driver's seat. For the first half of their journey out of the city the two mutants remained silent, the radio playing between them being the only sound between them. Finally, Wade turned to look at her, mask in place over his face, "So, question, Tinkerbell…"

"Possible answer," She replied her eyes focused on the open highway before them.

"You've been alive…how long?"

"Long enough… _why_?"

"See, after our first little meeting I started doing some reading and I couldn't help but notice that there's another Alice Alexander floating around…at least there was." When the female mutant remained silent, Wade turned physically in his seat his hands clasped under his chin and feigning innocence, "You two wouldn't be the same are ya?"

"Depends on what point in history you're speaking about," She finally sighed. Like a hunter seeking his prey, Wade jumped on the statement with more enthusiasm than a kid being presented a piece of candy. Alice waved a hand to calm the torrent of questions that began to spill from his cloaked mouth, "I was born in 1753…then I died in 1778 – also how I found out I was a mutant funnily enough."

"Cute, cute…what I wanna know is a fun thing I read about World War II." He chirped excitedly with what Alice could only assume was a grin, "see Google is great for a lot of things these days and I saw a cute little image called _Lovers on the Battle Front._ "

"I really need to get that removed."

"Ah, so it's true!"

"That I served during World War II? Yes, that's true."

"Who was that handsome stud in the picture? Please tell me you at least boned at some point."

Alice grimaced at the crude wording before sighing, "His name is Sergeant James Barnes. And no…we did not _bone_. There was very little chance of that happening at any point during the war especially since I was not recruited into the Howling Commandos like he had been."

Wade was silent for a few moments, sensing the air of seriousness that had enveloped his partner before glancing at her once more. He took in the harsh lines that had formed on her face, her once hazel gaze more of a cinnamon color and her fist tightening around the steering wheel. It was in that moment that he realized that there was much she kept reserved about herself, perhaps from being unwilling to share or maybe she was afraid to share. His mind trailed before realization hit: there was no one she could maybe share everything with. He had Weasel, who happened to be his oldest friend, but it seemed that even surrounded by people she considered herself alone.

"He's your person."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"The person you're trying to save," he reiterated slowly. "You know: the peanut butter to your jelly, the doughnut to your hole, the cream filling to your Twinkie, I could go on but I think you get the point!"

She sighed deeply, "Yes…he's…he's my person."

"Like I have Vanessa, you happen to have a Soviet Assassin…"

"Yeah I – wait what?"

He took in her furrowed brows and the mask she had slammed into place in response to the accusation and he realized immediately she was merely playing possum. "You think I didn't follow up on that shit show in Washington? It was all over the news Tinker Bell."

Alice cursed to herself, her grip tightening on the steering wheel, "Fine. Yes, I happen to be still in love with a POW that was brainwashed into becoming a Soviet Assassin…we all have our weaknesses you know."

"Of course I do," Wade chirped, "just figured I'd ask since you seem to know everything about me."

"That's fair."

"Is that why you asked for my help with this HYDRA nonsense?"

"It is. Bucky isn't under their control anymore and is on the run…HYDRA would love nothing more than to recapture him and brainwash him all over again to act as their fall guy. I can't let that happen to him again."

Wade observed her for a moment, the eyes of his mask furrowing as he undoubtedly narrowed his eyes behind his mask. "So, it's a purely selfless endeavor?"

"For the larger part yes…I'd also not like to be a lab experiment again if I can avoid it."

"Fair enough."

The car fell into a silence after that, less tense on Wade's end as he happily played with one of his hand guns and when he became too bored with that he began fiddling with the radio as the stations changed the further they got from the city. It took them nearly two hours, but soon they found themselves at the ice rink that Alice had pinpointed as Ajax's distributor in the area. Wade stepped from the car, sniffing the air and stretching loudly as Alice played with her bracer, pulling up the main security feed and looping it in an effort to hide their entry.

"We're clear."

While the woman couldn't see the other mutant's face, she could sense the large grin that spread across his lips from behind his mask, "Alright Tinker Bell! Looks like it's show time! Ladies first!"

Alice nodded slowly, her mask in place over her own features, and stepping towards the door where she quickly disengaged the lock on the door and stepping into the facility. The main doors opened into a main lobby that held a series of flags including one that indicated the rinks name and logo. Pictures lined the walls along with awards from what appeared local hockey teams ranging from peewee to adult divisions as well as figure skating in the same categories. The two mutants could already feel the cool air from the rink itself and Wade skipped up beside her, flicking the safety of his gun off. The two didn't need to speak as they had infiltrated facilities before for both of their endeavors. Wade nearly pranced into the staff areas while Alice started for the stairs, a knife already in hand as she made her way up to where the blueprints marked the security office to be. She wasn't anticipating finding many people in this area at night, but she wanted to make sure her loop was still running.

Finding the security room was easy enough and with a quick glance inside she was surprised to not see a stationary security guard, but then again she doubted many Podunk areas such as this one upstate had need for an in-house security guard unless it was in a more heavily populated area. Glancing at the screens and noticing her feed still working she closed the door and crept down the hallway into what she was sincerely hoping would lead her to the administrative offices. The sound of gunshots did little to surprise her as she began to hear feet rushing ahead of her and she turned just as two goons appeared before her. Without prompting, Alice darted forward to meet them, sliding on her knees as she approached the first man and slicing across the back of his knee and using her momentum to spin back to her feet, her leg snapping out into a spinning hook kick and catching the other man in the temple before following up the kick with a mule kick to knock him off balance. As the second man stumbled away from her with the power of her kick (something she was incredibly proud of as both Clint and Natasha had complimented her on her leg strength during their routine training recently), she turned just as the first man pulled out a gun and she wasted no time in kicking the nose of the M-16 upwards as he fired and following through with her knife and allowing the blade to sink into the side of his neck. She quickly pulled the knife back out from the first man's neck and spun, catching the incoming second with the blade to his wrist as his threw a punch before following it up with a slice under his arm and finishing it by stabbing him in the chest.

With both men taken out she continued on her path towards the administrative offices where she was certain she and Deadpool would find their quarry. Finding the offices she was surprised to find them vacant and using the tech she had _borrowed_ from Tony's lab to create her own and retrofit her own suit she couldn't see anyone hiding in the nearby area. Clearly Deadpool was drawing enough attention and the hired grunts that were left to guard this area were more focused on dealing with the mutant mercenary. She swept into the office easily enough, ignoring the three boxes of Krispy Kreme donuts and beginning the process of hacking into the company's computer system. The very first thing she did after breeching the firewall was look into any information on Weapon X she could find. It took her some digging, but thankfully the computer was older than she was used to hacking and after a few moments she froze, her fingers locking over the keyboard.

"No…this can't be right." Her eyes quickly scanned the information once again before she frowned, pressing into her ear to activate her earpiece. "You read me, DP?"

" _Loud and clear Tinker Bell…just found Señor Cabello here and he doesn't seem to want to talk so I broke his leg. Do you think he needs the other?_ "

Alice could hear the man cursing over Wade's intercom and didn't need to ask how the hired hand felt in regards to the mercenary's interference with his evening before she sighed, "Well I just hacked this yahoo's mainframe and there's nothing here on Ajax. I did find some info about the serum though…"

" _I'll take that as break his other leg_ ," Wade informed her with mocked enthusiasm despite the man's screams. " _Now, let's try this again…tell me WHERE YOUR FUCKING BOSS IS!_ "

She ignored the back and forth interrogation she was hearing, briefly snorting when the mercenary chirped about running him over with a Zamboni. As Alice continued searching through information about the serum that Cabello was helping distribute she briefly looked out to see the man dragging himself across the ice and leaving a trail of blood behind him as Wade danced his way off the rink and to where they stored the large machine meant to maintain the ice. Shaking her head and snickering to herself she set the intercom to play the Canadian National Anthem as the Zamboni made its appearance onto the ice.

Wade's laughter echoed around the empty rink before he snorted, " _You're about to be killed by a Zamboni_!"

As the mercenary continued yelling and taunting Ajax's goon, Alice continued her hack, her eyes narrowing on the information she was seeing as she found a list of names and addresses and after cross referencing them through the small computer at her wrist she was able to determine that these were other dealers that seemed to be connected to Weapon X in some way. As she continued to dig she found another list that contained more names and as she cross referenced those names she found them to be of employees of the rink or those who held some kind of membership be it for their children or for themselves that had questionable history. She knew she would have to delve further into the list, but as she began checking each of the names with access to the dark web she was able to determine that each name was of someone who had little to lose whether it was large amounts of debts or illnesses.

"This is a target list…" she realized suddenly. "This list…it's a list of targets to be brought into the program."

Abandoning the list on the main computer she began running an experimental program she had been working on to cross reference each person in an effort to find further similarities on the system attached to her suit. While that ran she continued her search into Cabello's account in an effort to find anything she could use to help Wade locate Ajax and nearly jumping when Wade's voice roared in the rink behind her as well as her earpiece.

" _TELL ME WHERE YOUR FUCKING BOSS IS! OR YOU'RE GONNA DIE…in 5 minutes_!"

Frowning behind her own mask, Alice continued scanning the names on the computer that were Cabello's contacts before her eyes came across a single name that had no addresses or any type of contact information. "Siren?" She whispered to herself, "Is that a code name or mutant helping with the program of some sort?" Shaking her head she marked the name for her own research, knowing she didn't have enough time to do an extensive search before closing the windows down after stripping the entirety of the information from his hard drive. Better to make this look like a random crime and let law enforcement figure out that these men were lowlifes than to leave information that could eventually trace back to her or Wade and their mission.

After finding a frustrating lack of anything else, she made her way from the office and back down into the main lobby where she waited for Deadpool to emerge. When the mercenary in question did exit the main rink and finally meet up with her, he was beside himself. Despite killing each and every able bodied man in the vicinity he still had no further intel about where he could find Ajax, but upon seeing his new partner-in-crime awaiting him he tried to tamper down his frustrations.

"Did you enjoy paying homage to your people?"

"You're _hilarious_."

Alice smirked from behind her mask despite her discomfort with the information she had found and holding out a packet of papers for Wade to take. "These were on his computer."

"What're these?"

"A list of contacts that're in direct relation to the distribution of the serum; in layman's terms: potential leads."

"You really know how to turn a situation around, Tinker Bell."

Alice shrugged, "Yeah. I also found another list, but this one was different. People who had significant debt, medical issues of the terminal variety…I'm running a program now to determine if there are other similarities or if I'm just overthinking this but…"

"You think they were like me?"

She nodded slowly, "If they're grooming people and putting them into a similar situation you found yourself in…then I'm worried about what that could potentially mean. We don't have a whole lot of information in regards to Francis or what his connection with Weapon X and HYDRA is other than the serum they pumped into you."

Wade was silent for a few moments before gesturing for the two of them to exit the building as there wasn't much else that could be found out and neither of them wanted to hang around long enough to rouse more suspicion than they potentially already had. Finally he sighed, "Well, that's just in-fucking-credible, isn't it?"

"That they're taking advantage of people in bad positions?"

"That and knowing that they're taking advantage of sorry sacs of shit like myself," Wade shrugged dismissively before frowning down at the small monitor on her wrist. "Your thing is blinking." Alice looked down at the screen before frowning as she opened it between the two of them and looking at the information presented. Wade grunted a few times as he tried to find what he was supposed to be looking at, but after a moment the female mutant's eyes widened behind her mask, a gasp leaving passing her lips without her permission. "What, what am I supposed to be seeing!?"

"Wade…the thing these people have in common…is that they all share a dormant X-gene."

**-0-**

The next morning found the mutant pulling up the long drive in Westchester, New York to the familiar stone structure that housed the X-men. She and Wade had gotten back to the city in what felt like a blink of time the night before as they marinated in their revelation and frustration in equal measure. He had told her when she had pulled up outside of his apartment in the Bronx that he was planning on looking into the list she had given him and adding them to his map, but had not asked her to come with him for the next few hits. She had merely nodded and replied that if he needed her help all he had to do was ask, but also informed him that she would need to pass on the information they had gathered to the X-men with only a promise that she would keep them off of his back if the subject arose. She and Wade had a balanced partnership and neither seemed willing to risk that relationship just yet, which she found surprising for the mercenary as he continuously reminded her that he preferred to work alone. Alice felt the same way, enjoying the freedom and flexibility of working on her own, but knew that for what she needed to get done with taking out HYDRA that it was not wise to go in with no backup and by herself.

Alice frowned deeply to herself as she made her way into Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, Rumsfeld trotting beside her loyally in the icy February morning. She knew that during the early mornings was the best time to catch the Professor as he liked to have his tea and speak with the mutants who acted as teachers in his school for mutants. The duel-toned woman knew that, while the Professor and Logan vouched for her and understood her position, there were other members of the X-men team and staff who did not and it never ceased to make her uncomfortable; she detested arrogance first thing in the morning and especially from the mutants who believed her to be neglectful of their cause. As she made her way up the stairs she glanced up briefly to see the familiar visage of Logan seemingly waiting for her.

"You're here early."

Alice blinked, surprised to see him with what appeared to be a simple cup of coffee as opposed to a beer or cigar, and dipped her chin into her scarf, "Uh, yeah. I needed to ask him some questions about my mutation."

Logan's thick brow arched incredulously, nodding his head in the direction of the door and offering her an arm and leading her into the foyer of Xavier's mansion. "I'm surprised to see you're asking the Professor for help. What convinced you?"

"I lost a good man a few years ago…tried to push some of myself into him. It didn't work." Logan glanced down at the smaller woman, brows creasing as he listened. "Then Washington happened and I died again. I realized then that I don't have all of the answers and a whole slew of other stuff…you know the usual."

The two came to a stop and Logan frowned softly, brows knitted together in a tight furrow, "You found him didn't you? Barnes."

"Yeah," Alice nodded with a hum, kicking her feet awkwardly, "I did. I haven't changed in two hundred years…didn't care to, but maybe it's time that I did. Xavier, admittedly, has proved an evolution in the X-gene before. I have the most useless mutation there is…it doesn't help me…doesn't give me a defense mechanism. It just prevents me from a permanent end."

"This is a bit darker than normal for you…dark and broody is more my stick."

"That may be true, but I'm tired, Jim. I'm tired of feeling useless and even more tired of getting my ass kicked," she winced and glanced away from him briefly before meeting his eyes once more, "…HYDRA's back and I've got reason to believe they're working with Weapon X somehow."

"Eliza…please tell me that's a joke."

"You know I wouldn't joke about this."

The younger mutant ran a large hand through his hair glancing down at the woman and her sallow face he found himself believing her despite himself. "How'd you figure this out?"

"Hacked into some files…when Black Widow released the information from S.H.I.E.L.D's database I mined through all of the crap and was able to pick out idiosyncrasies. Things weren't adding up."

"Hence why you asked Colossus about Deadpool."

"I know what they were doing to me or at least I had my ideas." Alice met his eyes, brows furrowed tightly and voice thick, "They took my blood every day for twenty years. That's not a coincidence."

Logan rubbed his chin and glancing at his knuckles, "No…it's not."

"There's a lot we have to catch up on…"

"Yeah we do."

"Logan?" Alice glanced up the staircase to see Jean and Hank watching the two of them and she sighed slightly, stepping a polite distance from Logan in an effort to not anger the Phoenix as she and the adamantium-laden mutant tended to fall back into old habits in regards to decorum and manners of their respective times. The redhead glanced between the two older mutants, eyes narrowing slightly before her eyes settled on the shorter woman. "We weren't expecting you today."

"You rarely do," she intoned blithely, her honeyed eyes flickering to Beast and offering him a nod in greeting. "It's nice to see you, Hank."

"You too, Alice." Hank smiled, adjusting his glasses, "I assume you're here to see the Professor."

"If he isn't too busy…I wouldn't be here if this wasn't important."

"No, I don't doubt that."

Alice met Logan's eyes briefly before sighing softly. "Some things have come to light and even I'm not arrogant enough to think I can do this on my own…at least, not without a little guidance."

"Hence your early arrival I see!" The four mutants turned to see the bald-headed, patient and smiling visage of Professor Charles Xavier, his blue eyes warm and meeting each of them individually before resting on Alice and offering her a raised brow in question. "It's always good to see you. Come, let's talk…it seems you've much on your mind already."

"I distinctly remember asking you _not_ to read my mind."

"I also remember telling you not to project so loudly," Charles smirked at her before motioning that she follow him. With a brief look at the few gathered X-men, Xavier turned and began wheeling his way back the way he had come. Alice glanced over her shoulder briefly and offered Logan a weak smile before tapping her leg for Rumsfeld to follow her and almost too happily the large mutt trotted up beside her and leaving the Wolverine's side where the man had been absentmindedly petting his head. The two mutants walked for a short period before Xavier turned at the side of the door and motioned her through politely. Alice stopped just before his desk and took the few moments she had to glance around the room.

The last time she had been in Xavier's office had been only a few months prior when she had come to ask him about furthering her mutation and her prowess with it. The room looked much the same as it had a few months ago with the early morning light passing through the large panned windows that overlooked the courtyard where many of the younger mutants would socialize, practice or do homework in between their classes. The room was lined with built-in bookshelves that held a series of books as well as small trinkets to break up the more studious look of the office (which Alice was aware was originally Charles's study before he had converted his home into the school for mutants back in the early 70's). There were plants lined into the bookshelves to make the office a little less intimidating and more welcoming and Alice wondered if that had been a recommendation of Jean or Storm and she could spot a great many pictures taken, though she didn't pay much mind to the ones that dotted the office walls and instead allowed her eyes to be pulled to the one frame on his desk that contained a younger version of himself with a young woman that Alice knew she had seen once or twice in passing when at the school.

"Moira MacTaggert," Charles's voice stated suddenly and snapping Alice from her observation, "she was the agent we worked with during the Cold War."

"Ah, I see…were you two…?"

"Together? I had made choices for the both of us that I realized much later was unnecessary and harmful for the both of us, but yes, she and I are still married. Though, she isn't around as much due to her work with the Government."

"Oh," Alice hummed slowly before meeting the Professor's eyes. "I'm certain you already know why I'm here then?"

Charles only offered her a smile and a cup of tea from a pot that had been clearly brewing in the corner that Alice hadn't looked in (not surprising, really, she told herself as it was still early morning and the Professor was clearly still in midst of a morning routine which included his cuppa) and seating himself across the coffee table that had been added to his large office after the older mutant took a seat on one of the leather chairs in front of it. "As I said before, you were projecting loudly…you're anxious about HYDRA and a gentlemen by the name of James Barnes, correct?"

"I really do dislike when you do that," Alice snorted before taking the cup of tea with a nod of thanks, "but yes, HYDRA has been partnering with Weapon X…which means that not only are random civilians in jeopardy of being taken advantage of, but mutants are as well…hence why I'm here and not with the Avengers."

"I find that surprising considering you work with them."

"I do, but…there are… _restrictions_ that come with working with them. Some ethical and some moral, but the Government has been keeping an extremely close eye on them since the incident in Washington a little less than a year ago and since S.H.I.E.L.D was disbanded due to HYDRA infiltration."

"Where you found your life partner…"

"Yes."

Charles looked the woman over for a few minutes and watching her shift uncomfortably before the smugness in his expression dropped into one of sympathy. "You were always so stubborn when it came to working with groups, Eliza." He watched as she seemed to wince at the name before he continued after taking a sip of his tea and placing it on the coffee table between them, his hands resting in his lap, "I understand the pain you're feeling…the uncertainty. When fighting Apocalypse a lot of my power was unlocked by force because he and I bonded briefly due to a ritual. You wish to expand your own abilities and I've told you before that in order to do that it must be worked like a muscle because otherwise it could break your already fragile state of mind…but if you remain so adamant there are other ways to work your mutation and force it to evolve further."

As Alice opened her mouth to rebuke the statement about her state of mind she found herself sinking into the chair more and her jaw snapping shut at the look Charles shot her as if knowing what she was going to say. Huffing the woman sighed deeply, "I suppose you already looked into my state as soon as I walked through the door."

"Again, you project _very_ loudly," Charles chuckled. "And again, this is your choice, but I do not recommend the latter."

Alice pondered his statement for a long moment as she sipped at her tea. She knew that if she were to undergo the latter suggestion Charles would make certain that there were safeguards in place in the event something went wrong, which would inevitably happen given the nature of her mutation, but Alice wasn't certain what she could do or even how her mutation could evolve. Glancing up at the Professor she saw him waiting patiently, his eyes focused on her, but not prying and signifying that he was allowing her to make her decision in private.

"If I go with the latter option…" She drew off in uncertainty as she attempted to word her question appropriately, "I don't see how I could push my mutation into evolution…or if it can even do any more than just preventing my death."

"Your mutation is unique," Charles began after a moment, taking a sip of his tea and gently pushing the plate of cookies closer to the woman in a silent offer of food; Alice didn't hesitate long to take one of the treats as she was still a sucker for her older traditions. "You have hyper-regeneration as far as I can tell, but it is not the same as Logan's where it merely slows his aging…in you it actually seems to prevent your death and prevent you from aging thus giving you a sense of immortality. I could perhaps tell you more with a blood test and breaking down your X-gene…but I also realize that by asking you that I'm also putting you at risk in the event that that information falls into the wrong hands."

"I wouldn't be surprised if it already has," she admitted slowly and with a deep scowl. "Hence the second reason for my being here."

"Your concern with HYDRA and Weapon X working together…yes, I can see where your concern lies." Charles nodded before raising his one hand in a placating manner before a frown tugged at his lips suddenly, "Can you tell me about the Agent that you tried to save…back in 2012?"

Alice's mind stilled, surprised at the mention of Agent Coulson before a frown marred her lips as she recalled his death. "Agent Coulson…he had been stabbed through the aorta, lungs and heart by Loki's scepter," she didn't bother elaborating, knowing that Charles would be able to put the two pieces of information together as she formed the image in her mind from that moment, "I remember trying to save his life by pushing my mutation out of myself and into him…hoping that it would be able to at least give him a small chance at his life being saved if not heal him completely. It almost seemed like a natural instinct…but I don't remember ever trying it before."

Charles placed his cup back into its saucer before stapling his fingers together in a thoughtful glance, "May I take a closer look?"

It took a moment before Alice nodded her consent and allowed the Professor to view the memory of that moment and placing himself closer to where her mental state was at that moment in an effort to allow him to truly see what she had been speaking about. It was sudden when a few other moments of her life flashed before he pulled from her mind and she blinked. A frown remained on his features as he moved to one of his many bookshelves, eyes scanning the titles before a book slid from the shelf and into his awaiting hands, but he did not allow her to see the title just yet. He then wheeled to a flower in the corner of the room that appeared withered and dying, picking it up and wheeling back to where Alice sat with a furrow to her brow. Glancing at her he held the flower out to her, gesturing her to take it and when she did he nodded before relaxing back into the position he had held previously.

"May I ask what the flower is for?"

"Focus on it…think about how it feels when you touch it, how it looks…then I want you to go deeper."

"Deeper?"

"Yes…look past its outer skin to a micro level…then to a cellular and tell me what you see."

"I don't understand how you want me to look past what I can see…"

"You understand biology having been a nurse for several years…this time, try without a microscope."

Alice frowned in confusion for several minutes before sighing softly through her nose and focusing on the plant. The flower was a rose, browning along the edges and wrinkled from dehydration; its stem was dull and had similar browning patches to the leaves and petals and the center was brown with age. She examined the exterior of the plant before forcing herself to attempt to look further.

"What makes the cells sick…what can cause a plant to appear dead?"

She focused harder on the questions before closing her eyes and picturing the image of a plant cell. She recalled that plants have eukaryotic cells with large central vacuoles, cellwalls containing cellulose, and plastids such as chloroplasts and chromoplasts. And then she pictured what a decomposed cell could potentially look like, briefly hearing the Professor muttering small affirmations to her, before slowly filling in the parts of the cell that appeared dead or decomposed and filling the picture back in.

Charles watched as she focused, knowing that Alice could not undertake lessons in a way such as his students and that she had gone many years learning how her mutation worked to keep her alive, but never fully understanding what her mutation could do. The two had a tenuous relationship due to his persistence in the early 90's to join his school and learn more, however, it had done nothing but push her further away. Logan had been incredibly insightful into what she had experienced for 20 years as well as how best to handle the female mutant, but it did nothing but break his heart that she was so stubbornly against trusting others so much like her and knowing that younger mutants could learn so much from her. Shaking these thoughts he watched as she focused on the image of a plant's cell, decomposing it before filling it back in and watching as the plant between her fingers started to green at the stem where she pinched it. A smile twitched at his lips before he realized that her mutation was not necessarily immortality so much as it was biological manipulation. As he began to feel Alice's focus waning, he called her back to open her eyes and when she looked up at him he gestured to the plant pinched between her thumb and forefinger.

"W-what?"

"Biological manipulation," He informed her with a warm smile. "I apologize for sifting through a few other memories, however, you had said that you couldn't remember a time when you had focused your mutation in an effort to heal someone before, but you had… _many_ times before."

At the pinched tone in his soft tenor, Alice's eyes snapped back to meet his from where they had been focusing in incredulous wonder at the flower's stem. Her mind immediately recalled her earlier years when she had been married to Seamus, and the several times they had attempted to conceive and the many times she had miscarried or birthed an already dead fetus. "Oh…oh my god…you mean –"

"No…I understand where your mind is going and no, you did no siphon their life force. Unfortunately, the children you had tried to have never had life in them. But you had attempted to heal them without realizing you were doing it…you were doing so instinctually."

Alice swallowed in an attempt to clear her suddenly parched throat, "So…you mean to say that my mutation isn't immortality at all?"

"I sincerely doubt it, however, I cannot know for certain…especially since we both know that there _is_ a way for you to die."

Alice was silent for a long while after that, her mind reeling through the last few moments as well as years in the past as she attempted to put the pieces together. If she wasn't immortal that meant that HYDRA was after something else – something that lay dormant in her blood. Was it the biological manipulation ability that she seemed to have? If that were true it perhaps could prevent a great number of their agents from death or perhaps make it so that they could reach some other goal. But if that was true, in which Alice was aware, Department K of Weapon X had already used her blood in a serum that created Deadpool. What else could it do?

"I believe that, with enough practice, you could eventually use this aspect of your mutation for a human body," Charles stated and bringing her attention back to him, "you have done so instinctually in the past and not just with those close to you. You've always been a healer, and always interested in healing arts. You were a nurse for a great many years and many lives were spared because at your core that was and is what your mutation is. Hyper-regeneration, as you well know, is not a common mutation and even during my research I could not prove that the same mutation could be passed from parent to child as the X-gene is unpredictable at best, but like Logan you have a sub-mutation that allows you to either protect yourself or protect others. You may not have bone claws to help defend you, but you have knowledge and sometimes, Eliza, that is more powerful."

"I understand…"

"I would work on this with plants for now…work your way up from there," Charles smiled once again before clasping his hands together once more. "As for your other concern…"

"I've at least proven that Department K has used my blood to manufacture a serum that was then taken up by Weapon X. Wade Wilson, as I'm sure you're aware of, was a recipient of this serum and upon looking up his old records from his childhood I found he had a dormant X-gene, but was not a mutant. The serum was meant to target the dormant gene and forcibly bring it to surface." Alice explained, her hands clasped tightly around the cup of tea in her hands, "And briefly when HYDRA had me in DC they believed that my blood could unlock immortality. Then while hacking a HYDRA base in South America, I found record of a mutant they called Siren and then again last night when hacking into a computer upstate of someone working with Weapon X…have you ever heard of a mutant with that name before?"

"There are a great many mutants that I do not know…Erik may have a better idea. Now that relations have been less tense between us all, he and Mystique been coming around the school more. They both have a greater knowledge of mutants that are not within our grasp. However, the knowledge of Weapon X forcing a dormant X-gene to the surface is concerning."

"Also in the way that they force it…systematic torture and injections is certainly Weapon X's M.O."

"True…I'll have my team look into it…especially since you have your own things to worry about."

"If it's helpful…they seem to be targeting those who are at their lowest and don't see any other options. Homeless people, terminal patients, runaways…"

"I'll have Jean head up the investigation."

Alice nodded slowly in understanding. As much as she didn't care for the Phoenix, she certainly had incredibly powerful telepathic abilities that rivaled those of the Professor and that was something that she couldn't deny. When the Professor cleared his throat, she met the knowing look in his eyes and she found herself frowning. "Was there something else you wanted to bring up, Charles?"

"I'm surprised you haven't brought Mr. James Barnes up…though, you've corrected me each time with _Sergeant_." Alice felt the blush light her cheeks as she had been silently correcting him since he had brought him up the first time.

"I didn't feel as if it was imperative information."

"To me, perhaps not and in comparison with the information you've presented to me I would normally agree…but I get the sense that this is important to _you_."

"Well, of course it is. The man that I was in love with died in war and is suddenly alive 70 years later…the amount of pain he's suffered in that period…"

"Does not negate the pain you suffered as well." Charles interrupted as he leaned towards her, his blue eyes expressing his seriousness. "Those years were not without your own suffering and my involvement in that does not go unnoticed, even in my unknowing at the time."

"I don't think I can hold you responsible for everything…you've been through your own suffering as well and I don't need to be a telepath to see that."

Charles offered her a humorless smile before sighing softly, "Under any other circumstances, Eliza, I would not offer this…but should you need it, I will keep my eye out for a Sergeant James Barnes."

Alice stared at the Professor for a moment before offering him a weak smile, "Thank you…it would be foolish of me to not take you up on that offer, but please don't spend energy that could be used in helping your students. Bucky has had his autonomy stolen from him systematically for 70 years and I don't want to force him into anything. If he chooses to stay hidden and away," she took a deep breath as if the admission caused her pain, "I…I just want it to be of his own volition."

The elderly mutant offered her a kind smile before nodding slowly in understanding. "I will focus my attention on the mutants or those that have been forced to become mutants. While I do not like this _Deadpool_ …I understand your need to work with him. If there is anything more I can do for you, please don't hesitate to ask. My recommendation is to speak with Erik or Mystique if you can about this _Siren_. They may know where to point you for more information and of course I will look into this as well."

"I know we haven't always seen eye-to-eye, but know that I appreciate your help with everything…just one last favor?"

"And what would be?"

"Please don't clue Jim into what I've been up to, please? I know he'll only worry and he has enough on his plate."

Charles smiled once more, "I will say nothing to him, but you and I both know how Logan can be."

"Exactly, which is what worries me."

"You would certainly know. Is that all you came here for today?"

Alice shot him a bemused stare before nodding, ignoring the knowing look on the Professor's face, "Yes, for now that's all I came for. As soon as I have anything more concrete I'll be back."

"Of course," he smiled before his face pinched, "and I'll try to remember that you don't appreciate the name _Eliza_ in the future."

"Thank you," the brunette smirked before standing and patting her hip for Rumsfeld to follow her, the dog having been curled at her feet for most of the conversation. Charles shot her another knowing look as he turned his chair around and began to follow her from his office and tracing the hallways back to the main lobby where students were quickly walking to and fro as they made their way to their classes. It was there that she found Logan speaking with Storm, the two greeting the few students that either said hello to them or waved. She sighed softly as she watched the two, a small smile quirking at the corners of her mouth.

"It's always good to know you are not bothered by their budding relationship," Charles smirked up at her and earning a returning smile.

"No, he and I have outlived our time together. While we'll always look out for one another, forever with him isn't in the cards."

"And you believe it is with the Winter Soldier?"

A frown tugged at her lips, "Fate is cruel, we both know that…we've seen it in different ways and experienced it in different ways." Stopping she turned to look at the other mutant with her brows knitted tightly over her eyes and ignoring the one bang that fell to curtain her vision, "But I have to believe that his story isn't over…for what we all knew Bucky was dead and we were forced to make choices, move on with our lives…then I lost Steve and the world lost Captain America, only for him to come back in a blaze of glory and so too did Bucky. My story continued on and it's been entwined with two scrappy boys from Brooklyn who were lost to time…I have to believe that there's a reason for that."

"It is different when those deemed mortal return isn't it?"

"More than anyone could know."

The two remained silent, watching as Logan and Storm continued their conversation before the tall women seemed to notice them over the Wolverine's shoulder. The white haired mutant smiled widely and waved, "Good Morning Professor, Alice."

"Good morning Storm," Charles greeted pleasantly while Alice nodded her own greeting, offering the woman a smile. "You have a class shortly, yes?"

"I do," She nodded. "Lunch is at 12 o'clock, try not to let Mystique get to you."

Logan offered her a small smile, accepting the kiss on his cheek as the woman seemed to dance away from the group and to her classroom, before glancing at the Professor and Alice, "Everything go alright?"

"Yeah. I gotta get going though. I have some Avengers business to do today," Alice hummed as she checked her watch, "but I do want to catch up. Maybe we'll do coffee or something."

"Sure."

Charles watched the two of them for a moment before looking up at the brunette, "Should you need any further assistance, please let me know. I'd be more than happy to help." As Alice went to comment that he hadn't been so forthcoming previously he held up his hand to stop her, "I understand I was a little…abrupt last we spoke, but understand that I do mean it when I say that if you need us, we'll be here."

"Thank you, Charles and send Hank my best…poor guy doesn't get a break." She acknowledged with a sigh before offering a wave to Logan and the Professor and leaving through the front doors with Rumsfeld happily following at her side. She frowned as soon as she exited the school as her phone began vibrating in her pocket and removing it she found she had three text messages from Steve.

 **Steve:** _Hey where'd you go?_  
**Steve:** _We're supposed to be meeting in an hour.  
_ **Steve:** _Al seriously we need to meet for the mission in 30 minutes!_

Rolling her eyes she typed out her reply.

 **Alice:** _I ran an errand this morning. Be back in twenty, I'm not far._

She tucked her phone back into her pocket and made quick work of starting her car and heading back towards Avenger's Tower. Thankfully she didn't encounter much traffic and managed to get up to the conference room just in time for the meeting to start. The team was supposed to be going over the plan to infiltrate a HYDRA base that Maria and Alice had been casing digitally via satellite in Sokovia and she knew more than anyone that everyone had been working hard to find Loki's scepter and especially Thor.

"Now that Wonderland decided to grace us with her marvelous presence," Tony chirped before calling for JARVIS to bring up a map. Alice rolled her eyes before taking over the schematics she had been able to dig up.

" _Cute_. Anyway, Maria and I have been looking for energy signatures that mirror what we were able to get readings from the Tesseract back in 2012. Unfortunately, that led us to a few HYDRA bases that did not have the scepter, but between the two of us and with help from JARVIS and my experimental facial recognition software, we were able to narrow down the possibilities to Moscow and Sokovia. Last night we got an active ping in Sokovia for Baron Wolfgang Von Strucker." As she spoke, images popped out of the table top projected by JARVIS to show what she was talking about. "It took some doing, but we were able to pinpoint their base of operations. I tried hacking in, but they were able to keep me locked out."

Tony scoffed with a smirk and earning him a glower from the mutant, "I'm sure it could've been child's play for someone with enough experience."

"I'm sorry, how old are you again?" Alice snorted derisively, "I'm not a novice, Tony. There's something actively keeping me out. Strucker has had his hands on the scepter for an undisclosed amount of time so we don't actually know what they've been doing with it."

"We know it had to have been since HYDRA was discovered within S.H.I.E.L.D." Steve frowned as he crossed his arms, his eyes scanning the information on the projection before him. Alice shook her head.

"We don't. All we know is that Sitwell and Rumlow were tasked with bringing the scepter back to S.H.I.E.L.D. headquarters. After that it could have immediately been moved and considering what we know about that team in particular it's very probable that the scepter was moved with clearance from Pierce."

"She's right," Natasha frowned as she looked over the schematics, "there's a reason why we haven't been able to find it until now, but we did so we should jump on this while we have the chance."

The mutant nodded, "Regardless, I can't hack into the main fortress so that will more than likely have to be done on the inside. The structure is an old fort that acted as Sokovia's only defense during the early 18th century and was then abandoned until the Sokovian military reopened it back in the late 80's. That's where you'll find Strucker. I've already upgraded the software in your suits and comms to communicate with JARVIS who will be operating from the satellite closest to your destination."

Steve nodded slowly, "Any known forces that we're expected to meet?"

"It depends," she sighed softly. "Based on what Maria was able to collect they have a twenty mile perimeter around the old fortress with a few outposts and bunkers in between which are used to deter the civilians from getting too close. Given what we know about the Tesseract from Bruce's findings as well as the original SSR files, we know that it's completely possible that Strucker has used old HYDRA blueprints to create weapons similar to the ones from World War II so caution is heavily advised. I've also uploaded these files into your suits."

The gathered Avengers nodded to one another before Tony shrugged, "Anything else or is that everything?"

"As far as I know, that's all I have. The Sokovian military isn't a large one, but be certain that you'll be facing them in force as well as grunts hired by HYDRA. Just be mindful of their weapons and try not to get yourselves killed. I'll be working with JARVIS remotely to ensure your success and in case of any injuries, I've already loaded them into the jet as well as emergency packs to your suits. Be careful."

As the Avengers began leaving the room to get themselves together Steve stopped and waited for the mutant to match his steps, his blonde hair neatly combed and his eyes narrowed on the brunette carefully. "Where were you this morning?"

"I took a quick drive out to Xavier's," She answered easily as she powered down the table and snatched a tablet before trotting after him. "Finally managed to get a straight answer from him about my mutation too!"

"That's great," The patriot smiled down at her. "Sam left this morning on another lead, he was gonna ask if you wanted to go, but when you weren't around he took off. He didn't want the possible trail to go cold."

"I'm sure he'll be fine, besides, I'm still doubtful that Bucky would stay in the U.S if he could avoid it. Given how active HYDRA has been since we unearthed them in S.H.I.E.L.D. and the government, I'm sure Bucky is just trying to stay low."

"That makes sense, but it's still worth looking." Alice stopped suddenly and forcing the patriot to stop as well when he realized she was no longer following him, "What?"

"It's just…what're we gonna do, huh?"

"What do you mean?"

"When we find him, Steve. What are we going to do? Force him to come back with us?" She sighed tiredly, dragging a hand through her loose hair. "I…I just wanna make sure we know what the next step is when we actually do manage to find him."

Steve watched her for a few moments before sighing, walking back to where she had stopped and placing his hands on her shoulders and drawing her eyes to him. "I promise that I'm not gonna force him into anything…I just want him to know that we're here for him…whatever that means. Okay?" Alice searched his eyes for a minute before she sighed, nodding her understanding. With a small smile of reassurance Steve squeezed her shoulders gently in comfort before releasing her and turning away to follow the rest of the Avengers for their mission, leaving Alice to stare at his back as he walked away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End Note: Here we have it folks! Some interesting information in this chapter including a mysterious helper to Weapon X/HYDRA as well as the death of Zamboni Guy. I definitely wanted to throw some Deadpool magic in this chapter since the "Murder Montage" is literally one of my favorite parts of the entire first movie and I cackled when I saw the Zamboni part in theaters...no, I'm not embarrassed at all, haha! Also, writing Deadpool has quickly become one of my favorite things recently because he's literally so unpredictable.
> 
> If you're wondering what Alice's "Override" suit looks like, just google a picture of Keith Kogane's Galra suit from Dreamwork's Voltron 2016. That's literally what I pictured when I wrote the description, lol. 
> 
> Also, some information about Alice's mutation ;) I dropped an early hint at the beginning of the story and for those who caught it here it is! Alice's mutation has a sub-class much like Wolverine...you didn't think immortality was her mutation did ya ;) But on a serious note, I took a lot of time to consider what I wanted to do with Alice's mutation and a lot of inspiration came from The Witcher and specifically from Geralt so if anyone made the connection there congratulations you're absolutely a top sleuth because that was very barely hinted.
> 
> But now HERE WE ARE FOLKS! The beginning of Age of Ultron! We're getting really close to Civil War and especially with how fast time went during this movie...I think it was legitimately like two or three days total...a weekend? Regardless I am SO excited for the upcoming chapters and especially more excited because I'm sensing a reunion between a certain mutant and brainwashed assassin coming up *laughs in bad guy*.
> 
> Also, if you haven't please check out my friend simmerandcry's story "Show Me Don't Tell Me"! It's an incredible story and she's honestly killing the characters and their development...also Avery is just the sweetest bean in the universe so if nothing else go read for an incredible OC ;)
> 
> Next chapter: The team finds a scepter and Alice and Steve meet with an old friend~!
> 
> As always, thank you again and I'll see you in the next chapter!
> 
> Peace, love and chicken grease!
> 
> xoxo Eirlys


	23. A Small Respite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there and welcome back! 
> 
> A special thank you to **reasons_unknown, OptimisticBunny, Allquo, la_lune, Hesperus and guest** for their recent kudos! As well as **simmerandcry, Hesperus and MajesticSeaPancake** for bookmarking the story! Also, if you've just stopped by to give it a quick read, thanks for just stopping by~! :)
> 
> There's a lot to this chapter so I'll go ahead and get right to it!

_As the Sky May Fall_  
_Deadpool_ **/|\** _Age of Ultron_ __  
23

Alice watched as the team began the infiltration of the Sokovian HYDRA base, her eyes on each member as they each had their own screen in her lab. Maria had been in a phone conference with Pepper for the better part of the morning and would be joining them as soon as she was finished, so her only company was Jodi, who was busy tracing the radiation that Loki's scepter was known to give off in the event that it was moved while the team was advancing. She frowned as she traced the heat signatures around the outer perimeter; JARVIS was already bouncing a signal off of the satellite closest to where Sokovia was geographically located and was connected to each of the team's coms to report activity within the fort.

"Alright guys, the farthest perimeter checkpoint is about 150 yards west of where you landed. According to what I've been able to uncover, with JARVIS's help, the rotation happens every hour so you should be in the clear. I've got two roving patrols that seem to be sweeping towards the north so if you're gonna get in quietly you're gonna have to move now."

Steve's voice cracked through the mic, " _Roger that. Do you have a pace?_ "

Looking over the screen that was showing the perimeter and the heat signatures she frowned, "Negative. So you may want to err on the side of caution. The less alarms you trip the –"

" _One of those alarms wouldn't happen to be a disk built into the ground…would it?_ "

"Why do you ask?"

" _Because Rogers may or may not have just stepped on one,_ " Tony's voice bit through the mic and Alice's eyes snapped back to the perimeter mark and frowned as as series sensors they hadn't known were there began lighting up.

"Well you guys better make quick with breaking through the perimeter. I'll see what I can do about scrambling their response team."

" _Let them come._ " Thor announced through the coms, his voice deep and with a determined edge. Clint's laugh broke through the lab's mic next.

" _Alright big guy…we get it._ "

" _Are you boys done standing around or do I have to do everything myself?_ " Glancing at Natasha's screen, the mutant was able to see that the former spy had already made good on taking out three approaching guards and stealing a rover. The silence and begrudging murmurs of agreement that sounded after her question brought a smirk to the mutant's face before turning to Jodi as the woman took off her headphones.

"Alright team, better get going. Loki's scepter hasn't been moved as of yet – likely Strucker isn't the one who's sending in the cavalry, but you're going to have to work fast."

" _Understood._ "

"I'll inform you as soon as I see any movement." She switched off her mic after getting another grunted agreement from Steve before turning to Alice and frowning. "Did you and Maria find the sensor mines or did you do that on purpose?"

"We had no idea about what kind of tech they could have." She frowned as she showed the former agent her screen, "For whatever reason, their tech isn't showing up on my sensors and that could be because they're using a cloaking method…maybe the same that's blocking the main fortress from me."

Jodi watched as the mutant began typing out a sequence of code after tugging her longer hair – that had been left down and naturally waving for much of the morning – into a messy bun at the top of her head, using a pencil to secure it and blue-light cancelling glasses perched on her nose, her fingers dancing over the keys. From behind the lenses of her glasses, Alice's eyes narrowed as their system started trying to boot her back out and she grunted earning a concerned look from her friend.

"What is it, what's happening?"

"They're trying to lock me out…but if I can keep them busy long enough," she drew off in uncertainty before her eyebrows arched and her eyes widened. "Hey JARVIS? Do you think if I can give you enough of a window to scramble the relay…we could maybe create waves of resistance and buy the team some time?"

" _That could be possible,_ " The AI informed her promptly before another monitor lit up on the side as the AI began running a secondary program and Alice continued her keystrokes in an effort to create enough of a window for the AI to squeeze through. " _In order to turn off the sensor mines you would need to be connected._ "

"Ah, JARVIS, you better watch the way you talk…might just charm a girl!"

" _I_ _ **am**_ _a program, Miss Alexander. I don't believe a relationship between us is possible or recommended._ "

Alice snickered in reply before hitting her mic to activate Tony's com, "Hey Iron-sides, you wanna do me a solid and grab one of those sensors and splice me in?"

" _You're so adorable when you try to use nicknames, Wonderland._ " He drawled with a snort, " _Gimmie a second and I'll get you patched._ "

"This way you can focus on covering the team from above and I can deactivate any more mines that are littered throughout the forests leading up to the fort."

" _Talk dirty to me one more time and I'm telling Pepper._ "

Jodi's loud groan off to the side only made the mutant giggle more audible as she continued her keystrokes and waiting for an opportunity to splice in. After a moment of waiting and the sounds of gun shots and explosions going off in the area, Tony's voice echoed through the lab once more.

" _Alright, you should be patched. Keep these guys off of us for a bit, will ya?_ "

"Do my best!" Alice's eyes traced her download bar and smirked when it finally hit full. "I'm in…jamming the system now…Alright! Communications to the main fort are down and so are the sensory mines. You should be able to advance without meeting a large amount of ground resistance. Just keep in mind that the closer you get to the fort the more resistance you'll have."

Steve's heavy breathing echoed through the mic, " _Any idea what numbers we're facing?_ "

"No numbers as of yet, as soon as I have something I'll let you know, but Maria and I _were_ able to pick up smaller bunkers littered closer to the main fort…no doubt you'll meet resistance there."

" _Do we know if they're outfitted?_ "

Alice glanced up at Natasha's screen to see her kick a guy out of her rover and into the way of Steve's stolen motorcycle (Alice rolled her eyes), the patriot not having time to weave out of the way and running the man over. Without needing to be there she knew the patriot had shot the former spy a look that screamed: _come on, really!?_ especially when she caught Natasha's half-hearted shrug in reply. "I'm in the exterior of their system now, but can't access the main cache. Just a tic…" She stated as she pushed away from her desk, using her chair and momentum to carry her to the other side of her lab – nearly hitting Rumsfeld who barely acknowledged her passing with his doggy eyebrows raising from where his head was resting between his large paws – and working on another screen. "Jo, go to my main screen and be ready to hit control-alt-VPNRNMXX0202, a window is going to pop up and you're gonna hit control-R"

"What in the bloody hell!?"

"It's going to bypass the firewall and open a command box. Once in the box you're going to type cache-back slash-."

"I hate fucking hackers."

"Just do it! Cache-back slash-CTRL."

"I am!" Jodi snorted as she read out the prompts, having Alice repeat them to verify that she had the correct information. Just as the blonde finished typing the last zero of the sequence she stepped away just as Alice slid back into place and took back over, her fingers once again dancing over the keyboard. She made a few more keystrokes before she smirked and hit the enter button and a series of windows appeared. "What is this, Al?"

" _This_ would be schematics of _all_ the bunkers littered throughout the field and main fort." The mutant chirped as she scanned the windows and blueprints before hitting her intercom on the main channel to connect her to the rest of the Avengers. "Alright listen up team! Bunkers are outfitted with tank-like turrets and fifteen men a piece. Main fort is sending out the remainder of their men - twelve-man units incoming in t-minus 10 minutes."

" _You heard her team, let's get moving!_ "

" _What're you waiting for, Cap, someone to take your picture?_ "

" _Barton, I swear to God –_ "

" _Careful, don't piss of America!_ "

Jodi watched the screens with each of the team members with a slacked jaw, "How is it that we rely on them to save the world…?"

"Through the bonds of friendship, rainbows and banter," Alice drawled with sarcasm before turning her eyes back to the screen. "Nat you got a rover coming up on your six!"

" _I see it!_ "

As the Avengers battled their way closer to the main fort, taking out what bunkers they could – mainly thanks to the Hulk – they came to a break in the tree line that lead them within ten miles of the main stronghold. It was only moments before Alice's sensors started beeping throughout the lab and the mutant was back to trying to find the source, the sound startling Jodi and nearly knocking her off of her seat.

"What the…?"

"Oh shit!" Jodi flicked her intercom, "guys I'm getting readings all over the place that are similar to the scepter!"

"It's gotta be the weapons they're firing," Alice called back. "They're not as potent as Red Skull's version, but still nasty so be careful!"

The team called out their affirmatives that they had heard the warning and continued pressing forward. As the team passed the next tree line, Tony broke off and flew into the sky with his boosters giving him an extra kick – his focus being the fort.

" _Wonderland, you need someone to access the fort's computers from the inside, right?_ "

"Yeah, whatever they have is blocking both mine and JARVIS's attempts."

" _Give me a minute_." He called back before narrowing his flight pattern to make himself more aerodynamic, but as he approached the fort he bounced off, exposing a force field that had not appeared on any of their sensors before. " _Ah, SHIT!_ "

" _Language!_ " Was Steve's instant response before grunting, " _JARVIS, what's the view from upstairs?_ "

The AI's voice sounded throughout Alice's lab and informing the two women as well as the rest of the team, " _The central building is protected by some kind of energy shield. Strucker's technology is well beyond any other HYDRA base we've taken._ "

" _Loki's scepter must be here. Strucker couldn't mount his defense without it._ " Thor commented, his hammer returning to his fist, " _At long last._ "

" _At long last is lasting a little long, boys._ " Natasha continued firing, leaving the two men she had just taken out on the snow-laden ground. Clint grunted before commenting from where he was avoiding fire from behind a tree.

" _Yeah, I think we lost the element of surprise._ "

Alice ignored the banter for a moment as she continued doing what she could to find a centralized location from where the energy shield was coming from especially now that she knew what was keeping her out.

" _Wait a second,_ " Tony's voice echoed through the coms. " _Is no one else going to deal with the fact that Cap just said_ _ **language**_ _?_ "

" _I know_ ," Steve groaned after gripping the handlebars of his motorcycle and flipping it out from underneath himself and into a truck of soldiers heading directly for him - stopping the truck and soldiers aboard in their tracks. " _It just…slipped out._ "

"Don't worry, Steve…I doubt anyone will hold it against you." Alice informed him with cheerful sarcasm and from behind furrowed brows as she continued to try and disable the force field surrounding the main base. "JARVIS, can you pinpoint any particular location that the force field is coming from? If I can isolate it I can try and work backwards to disengage it and get our people inside."

It took the AI a moment to reply, " _From your current location it does not appear as if you will be able to access it._ "

"No of course not…it's probably originating somewhere from inside the fort."

" _My thoughts exactly, Miss Alexander._ "

Jodi frowned as she watched her screen, "You've got more incoming – looks like tanks are on their way out."

" _Yeah we see them!_ " Clint called into his mic, a roar echoing from Bruce's that made both women jump for the mic in an effort to lower it as neither one of them were expecting it.

JARVIS's voice spoke once more, " _Sir, the city is taking fire._ "

" _Well, we know Strucker's not going to worry about civilian casualties. Send in the Iron Legion._ "

"I'll reach out to Sokovian law enforcement as well to try and urge them to keep people indoors while this is all going on. The last thing we need to do is put out a PR fire."

" _Good idea, Wonderland._ "

As Alice reached for the mic, Jodi pulled it away, "I'll do it. I've spoken with Sokovia's law enforcement before."

The mutant nodded and allowed her to make the call. As she turned her eyes back to the screens, her brows furrowed tightly in concern. "Hey guys, I'm picking up an anomaly entering the field at insane speed."

" _From which direction_?" Clint inquired breathlessly and glancing at his screen, Alice could see he was facing down a bunker. With a few keystrokes in which she managed to enter the cameras nearest where she originally picked up the spike she frowned.

"It's moving too fast for cameras to pick up, but it breeched the force field at the southernmost corner before heading into the woods. I'm not sure where it is, but be careful." Just as she said this she heard Clint grunt and groan before a heavily accented voice echoed from his mic.

" _You didn't see that coming?_ "

As the archer managed to stand and draw an arrow, the bunker that he had been prevented from blowing up shot and connected sending the archer back into the snow with a yelp and groan.

"Clint!"

" _Clint's hit!_ "

Alice grunted, "JARVIS take over for me, I need to see what we're dealing with."

" _Of course, Miss Alexander._ "

Pushing away from the main screen she focused in on Natasha's screen where she had finally managed to reach the fallen archer. "Nat, focus your camera towards his wound." The redhead did as asked and allowed Alice to see what they were dealing with, "Does it look like it's spreading at all?"

" _No, it looks frayed at the edges though…straight down to muscle._ " She grunted as the bunker continued to fire, " _Does someone want to take out that bunker?!_ " Without a single hesitation and with a roar the Hulk barreled through the bunker, tearing it apart with little effort and rushing on to his next target. Natasha blinked in surprise before chirping out a quick: " _Thank you_."

Alice frowned as she watched the burn continue to fester, "Alright, Nat. I need you to inject him with the nerve blocker and then administer 10ccs of morphine. That'll at least make him comfortable enough for transport. I'm not going to be able to do much when he gets here so I'll get on the phone with Helen Cho and see if she can make time to swing up to New York. She's best qualified to get him squared away."

" _Got it. Are you just talking to me or the main channel?_ "

"Just to you, I wanted to make sure we didn't have a casualty and you were closest."

" _Understood,_ " Natasha stated, voice strained. " _Clint's hit pretty bad, guys. We're gonna need evac. Alice is already getting in touch with Helen Cho._ "

Thor's voice echoed briefly in the coms, " _I can get Barton to the jet. The sooner we're gone the better. You and Stark secure the scepter._ "

" _Copy that._ "

Jodi soon rejoined the mutant and noticing what was happening quickly took over, "You go ahead and get set up. I'll keep an eye on them from here."

"Thanks Jo, you're a life saver." Alice sighed before removing her ear piece and sprinting from the room with an all too excited Rumsfeld on her heels.

" _Find the scepter!_ " Jodi caught Thor calling as he took off before Tony's voice crackled through the coms blithely.

" _And for gosh sake, watch your language!_ "

" _That's not going away anytime soon._ " Steve muttered to himself and the former agent snorted.

"Probably not, Cap. Alice left to find a place to set up Barton and to call Dr. Cho. Whatever you guys do, you're gonna have to make it fast…though I'm not sure what you plan to do about the enhanced…"

" _He doesn't seem to be the main issue right now, but we'll cross that bridge when we get to it._ "

"Copy that."

Meanwhile Alice slid into Bruce's lab and began powering up machines, "JARVIS can you connect me with Dr. Helen Cho?"

" _Already dialing._ "

After a few moments of hearing silence, the doctor answered with her tone light, " _Ah Bruce, good to hear from you!_ "

"Sorry, Dr. Cho, it's Alice."

" _Oh, the number came up as Bruce, anyway what can I do for you?_ "

The mutant smirked to herself, "Any chance you can bring some equipment to Avengers Tower to help a fallen teammate?"

" _What're we looking at?_ "

"Severe burn straight through the epidermis and deep tissue damage with probable muscle damage. I had Natasha administer 10ccs of morphine and 4 units of fast acting nerve blocker – she knows to use wet compress and will have no doubt informed Thor to do the same."

There was a series of rapid fire Korean being spoken over the line before Helen replied in English, " _I'll be on my way shortly. Is Stark sending out a jet?_ "

"If he hasn't already, I'll make sure one gets sent now."

" _Wonderful, see you soon._ "

An hour later saw Helen Cho sweeping into Bruce's lab with a team of other medical professionals rolling what looked like the original version of her Cradle into the lab with Maria walking along with her. As her team began to set up, the Asian woman stepped towards Alice with a friendly smile. "It's a pleasure to finally get to speak with you in person, Alice."

"You as well," she replied easily before turning her eyes to the team that continued setting up the machine within Bruce's lab. "I haven't gotten any further updates about Clint, but from what I understand the team is on their way back?"

"Yes," Maria smiled as she leaned against the counter, "I spoke with Tony not too long ago. They should be back within the next hour with Loki's scepter secured."

"That's some good news," the mutant smiled as she crossed her arms self-consciously as both Maria and Helen looked respectable in their work attire and Alice was wearing a cropped hoodie and a pair of loose overalls with holes in the knees that were tucked into her boots. If the other two women noticed the mutant's discomfort they didn't show it. "At the very least we'll be able to take a bit of time off and start focusing more on outreach programs."

Maria smiled, "The Stark Relief Foundation has been doing that a lot in our stead of recent, but I don't think it's a bad idea to get everyone in gear and have them visit schools or something."

"Yeah, picture that," the mutant snickered, "maybe we'll get another promo like when they had Steve do all of those videos for in-school motivations."

"What?" Alice smirked as she pulled up the videos to show Helen, who clearly had no idea what the two women we speaking about. After a few moments, and three videos later the Korean doctor only laughed, "Is that supposed to help?"

"Not sure, but it definitely serves for great blackmail when I see need of it."

Maria shot the woman a narrow eyed look, "Yeah, you seem to be really good for it too."

Alice merely shrugged, her lips stretching into a wide grin. After a few more moments of friendly conversation between the three the mutant excused herself to return to her own lab and once inside she sighed softly, tossing her glasses onto the work bench and running her hands tiredly down her face. She had gotten very little sleep the night before as she hadn't gotten back to Avengers Tower until 3am, after which she had hid in her lab and pulled up schematics for a few more projects she was working on. That morning she had gone to speak with Charles and that had taken up much of her time as she had left the tower at 7am and had not returned until 10am. She knew that Steve, if given the opportunity, would pry and she had decided that the best way to nullify the entire situation was to distract him; especially since he would know she hadn't returned to the apartment the night before.

Sighing to herself she took her phone from her pocket and began scrolling through her contacts. She wanted to pick up a few plants in order to practice what she and Charles had discovered that morning and she knew she wanted to take time out in the next few days to read the book the wheelchair-bound mutant had slid into her jacket before she had left the School for Mutants. After a few moments of idly scrolling she found her thumb hovering over a name she had been avoiding the last few months since the entire Washington D.C. debacle: _Rebecca Barnes_. She found herself wondering what they could even talk about! The two had had a tumultuous relationship after World War II, the then twenty-three year old angry – as she had every right to be – young woman had been inconsolable that she had lost both her brother and his best friend (that had been like a brother to her as well) and Alice remembered vividly that she had taken much of that anger out on her. Rebecca had always been tough as nails and stubborn, something Bucky had warned her about before he had died.

Alice found herself snorting derisively, _Yeah, when he died…no he was just being ripped apart mind, body and soul._

Shaking the thought she sighed and hit the call button, listening as the line began to ring and wondering if she should have asked Steve if he wanted to go before throwing him under the proverbial bus. It didn't take long for the familiar voice to greet her.

" _I was wondering when I would hear from you, Allie._ " Rebecca's voice echoed through her receiver and the mutant sighed softly.

"I'm sorry, Becca…it's been crazy here recently."

" _I would imagine so._ " Her smile was transparent through the phone and relief flooded through Alice's system at the elderly woman's pleasant tone. " _I have a lesson this afternoon if you wouldn't mind coming by. We can stop for a small lunch right after._ "

"I'd love that, there's some things I'd like to talk to you about as well, if that's alright."

" _No doubt about my not-so-dead brother, I'd imagine._ "

Alice's heart sank to her stomach and she winced as she answered, "Yes…I'm sorry it's taken me so long. I know this isn't any easier for you either."

" _No, but it's an odd relief to know he's alive…I always prayed that he was alive somewhere. I just never thought it'd be as a brainwashed assassin._ "

"You…you know about that?"

" _Young lady there's very little that I don't know nowadays,_ " Rebecca laughed cheerfully and lifting the anxiety that the mutant knew was steadily growing. " _My brother was a lot of things, but a soldier and a murderer he was not. He was always too…oh darn…he was always so…_ "

"Cocksure?"

" _That wasn't the word I was looking for, but yes. Goodness, he was so smart and so stupid at the same time._ "

"I dunno," Alice smirked to herself as she played with the charm at her neck mindlessly, "I don't know many men who aren't lacking some sense."

" _You would know having lived so long,_ " The woman laughed playfully before sighing softly. " _But meet me at the school and then we'll head to lunch_."

"Sure thing, you mind if I bring a stray with me?"

" _Dear you know I would never say no to meeting another friend of yours._ "

"Sounds like a date then! I'll finish up what I'm doing here and head over in a bit."

" _Wonderful, my lesson should be over around 2 o'clock and we'll go from there._ "

"Alright, I'll see you then."

" _I love you_."

"Love you too."

As she hung up her phone and sighed she looked up to see Steve standing in the doorway in a work-out shirt and jeans, his brows deeply furrowed and his arms crossed over his chest. "Who was that?"

"An old friend," she answered flippantly. "I didn't even hear you guys come back."

"They just got Clint into the machine. What're you doing down here?"

"I was working on a project. Helen had everything all set up and ready to go and she's undoubtedly more qualified to make sure Clint doesn't end up permanently scarred because of my lack of information so…"

Steve frowned, "Al, there's no way you could've known and you got the information to us fast enough that we were able to counter easily enough. The enhanced that was in the field is responsible for this…not you."

Alice nodded, acknowledging what the patriot was telling her before sighing softly. "I dunno, I just feel like…maybe I should start going on missions with you all. Maybe casualties could be less."

"You helped us with two different bases within the last three weeks. We get that you have your classes and that you need to be here – it's what you asked for." Steve sighed as he stepped into the lab, watching as the mutant continued playing with the charm at her neck. "Look, we've got Loki's scepter and took out the last known head of HYDRA…we can all relax for a bit now and maybe put our efforts into other channels."

"Yeah…yeah I guess you're right."

Steve offered her a smile, resting a hand on his shoulder and watching as she substituted playing with her necklace for playing with the edges of her phone. The mutant had been quiet around him recently, her demeanor almost seeming withdrawn, but yet she still made efforts to do the things that they normally did together. It confused him but after taking a moment to fully appraise the woman seated beside him he noticed that she had dark circles resting beneath her eyes, her skin pale and she looked thinner than normal. Was she going through more than she let on? He knew she hadn't been sleeping well if at all due to the continuous torrent of nightmares she had been experiencing and that when she had any meals she played with her food more than she ate it. Her posture had also changed from straightened back (which she had told him had come from her early childhood living in a wealthy household as women of status in Colonial America were expected to look and act a certain way) and lifted chin to more a of hunched or curled position – easily more noticeable when she was sitting – and he found himself at a loss. For nearly three years she had done everything in her power to help him through some of his darker moments, but now that the shoe was on the other foot he wasn't sure how to help her.

As he began to open his mouth to speak, Alice heaved a deep breath before offering him a tired smile, "Wanna run a few errands with me?"

"Yeah sure," Steve answered after a moment of thought and a small smile, "I just want to make sure Clint is okay first."

The mutant nodded, "Well of course. I just think I need to get away for a bit and do something _normal_. Also, I'm visiting an old friend and I think you'd enjoy their company."

When Steve's brow arched incredulously the mutant offered him a secretive smile before patting the hand that he had yet to remove from her shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze and standing. The patriot was quick to follow her, and while his brows were furrowed in confusion he seemed to be in relatively good spirits as the two made their way back towards Bruce's lab where Alice greeted the rest of the team with warm smiles and hugs for those who wanted them.

"Ah, Alice I've got just the thing to cheer you up!" Thor smiled after she had said hello to him, the Aesir tossing an arm around her narrow shoulders. The mutant laughed nervously as he led her from the lab, briefly shooting Steve a look that screamed: _help me_ , only for the patriot to laugh her off and continue his conversation with Jodi. Thor led her to the common area just below the lab and to where the bar was located before leading her to a seat and nearly prancing behind the bar.

"Um, Thor, it's a bit early for me to drink…"

"Oh, no there's no drinks. I just left something back here that I thought you'd be interested in."

Curiosity piqued, the mutant crossed her arms over the bar and leaned forward as she waited for the god to return with whatever he wanted her to look at. He soon returned with a flask (which he assured her was for himself) and a small charm in his large hands.

"Go on, take a look."

Alice stared at him with open confusion for a moment before looking down at the charm in her hand, ignoring as he took a sip from his flask. It was a small circular disk that was engraved with a series of runes that she recognized to be Norse in origin with eight legs splitting from the center. The disk itself was gold and inlaid with a series of small diamonds and moonstones and carved out from the main eight legs and the runes associated were a series of other runes that completed the circumference of the disk. As Alice turned the charm over in her hands she used her nail to trace the careful engraving, taking note that the disk itself wasn't smooth showing it hadn't been manufactured, but had dents showing that it had been forged.

"Thor, this is beautiful." As she went to hand it back to him he raised a hand and shook his head, blonde locks falling over his shoulder and exposing the one strand of his hair that was braided with black.

Thor smiled, "No, this is for you. It is called the _vegvísir_ and it originated in what is now modern day Iceland. Each vísir, the symbol on the end here, is connected by what is called a _vegur_ and each vísir represents a realm within the cosmos. This one here," he pointed to the top of the disk that faced him, "is Asgard and connected straight down as you follow the vegur is Helheim." He then pointed to the right of the top central stave, "This is Nifheim and next is Svartalheim and Muspelheim…Helheim I've already shown you, but next to Helheim is Jotunheim, Vanaheim and, finally, Alfheim. At the center is Midgard, your Earth."

Alice followed the explanation easily enough as she and the Asgardian had spoken on many occasions about his culture and how it influenced early and modern pagan beliefs. She ran her fingers over the disk once more, her focus on the outermost part of the disk where runes had been carved. "And these?"

"Oh, that is the alphabet." Thor remarked almost flippantly in such a way that the mutant stared at him with a deadpanned expression. "I spoke to my mother after returning with Loki to Asgard a few years ago and she told me to keep this for a likeminded friend who may seem a bit lost. I believe that this was meant to be given to you."

"Thor…"

"It is intended to help the bearer find their way through storms…be they real or metaphorical, but my mother was many things in life, but wrong was not one of them."

Alice stared at the disk in her hands for a few moments before offering the large god a smile, "This is beautiful and I'll be sure to treasure it."

"See! I knew it would brighten your day."

"That it certainly did," She smiled. "I'll be sure to get it its very own chain, this way it doesn't tangle with my other one."

Thor appraised her for a moment before offering her a kind smile, "We will both weather this storm, Alice."

"We certainly will…and I dunno if I ever said it, but I'm sorry for the loss of your mother and Loki."

"He redeemed himself in the end," Thor sighed to himself before taking a sip from his flask and offering it to the mutant, who took it gingerly. "That isn't anything that should leave you inebriated, if that's any consolation, merely honeyed mead." He said in regards to the flask in her hands. "But my mother…she always knew more than she let on and I don't doubt that she knew what would happen that day. But I thank you for your care."

"We're friends, Thor, so of course. Besides who else would I trust to fully tire Rumsfeld out enough that he actually sleeps through the entire night."

"A mighty beast. He's quite funny you should know…also he appreciates the name change. He hated the one they gave him in the shelter."

Alice smiled, "I don't doubt that…anyway he's around here somewhere so feel free..."

"I will certainly do that!" He chuckled before looking down at the smaller woman as she handed his flask back after taking a sip, "It may not be my place to say, but whatever it is that is weighing your mind will eventually ease…don't be afraid to rely on us should you need it."

The mutant stared at the Asgardian for a moment before her mask fell and a small smile tugged at the corners of her lips, "I'll certainly bear that in mind…thank you Thor."

"Of course, now if you'll excuse me. I have to get myself cleaned up."

"By all means," She smiled before waving as he turned, his cape billowing behind him as he made his way to the elevator to where his apartment resided within the tower. Alice briefly stepped back into the lab and managed to catch the tail end of a conversation between Helen and the team, passing Tony who carried a small tray laden with green smoothies.

"She's creating tissue!" Bruce smiled after Helen had been explaining the machine to Natasha.

Helen nodded proudly, "If you brought him to my lab, the Regeneration Cradle could do this in…20 minutes?"

"Oh, he's flat-lining. Call it! Time?"

The billionaire's barb was met with snickers and Barton's noises of protests as he passed the smoothies out to those who had asked for them, handing one to the archer who smirked up at him. "No, no, no! I'm gonna live forever! I'm gonna be made of plastic."

Alice smirked as she leaned against the door. "Plastic isn't so bad…" she commented as she flexed her hand and earning an eye roll for her joke, "makes it easy to recycle."

"You'll be made of you, Mr. Barton." Helen interrupted, her brows furrowed briefly in confusion at the joke (as many did not know outside of the Avengers that Alice was a mutant). "Your own girlfriend won't be able to tell the difference."

"Well, I don't have a girlfriend."

"That I can't fix," the doctor commented as she glanced at another screen and ignoring the smirk he shared with Natasha and Alice as he sipped his drink. "This is the next thing, Tony. Your clunky metal suits are going to be left in the dust."

Tony shrugged and smiled at her in reply, "Well, that is exactly the plan. And Helen, I expect to see you at the party on Saturday."

"Unlike you, I don't have time for parties." She glanced back the chart in her hands before hesitating, "Will…Thor be there?"

"Party?" Alice frowned as she looked up at Tony with a quirked brow, "What party?"

Steve sided next to the mutant, placing a hand on her shoulder and drawing her from the door, "We're gonna head out for a bit. Call us if you need us."

"But wait what party?"

"I'll tell you on the way."

"But –!"

Steve was quick to usher her away before he smiled, "We're celebrating our win today. It's been a long time coming and I think the team and especially _you_ need to take a break." As he spoke he hit the call button for the elevator so the two could return to their apartment. "So Tony called in some favors and sent out a few invites to a limited amount of people. I think Sam is actually bringing his sister and his sister's husband."

"I'm surprised Tony's allowing him on the guest list."

"For as much as he complains, he knows Sam is incredibly helpful."

Alice's brow arched, "Has anyone mentioned that to Tony?"

Rolling his eyes, the patriot was quick to return to the apartment – walking backwards briefly so he could make eye contact with the mutant who looked otherwise annoyed with the entire situation despite her quip. He knew Alice hated large crowds and normally she did everything she could to avoid them and parties were number one on her list of things to avoid. She had managed to sneak away from every party Tony had thrown in the last two years and that included both Christmas and New Year's parties just this last year. Alice had even managed to evade Natasha and Jodi's attempts at staying long enough for a few drinks before the mutant would find a way to disappear which, Natasha had told him, had left the former spy both impressed and infuriated.

"Hey it'll be fun and it's not something you can get out of because it's doubling as PR."

As he spun back around he swallowed the laugh that wanted to bubble passed his lips when he heard her curse. Alice sighed softly, "Fine. I'll make an effort not to disappear…but one groupie makes a comment and I'm gone."

"Understood."

"Good, now I have to shower and change."

Steve's brow arched, "Because there's something wrong with the way you look now?"

The mutant smiled, "As flattering as that was and it's been noted, yes. The friend that we're meeting with is a bit old school and I'd hate to disappoint her."

"Um…should I dress up?"

"Nah, not in anything you normally wouldn't wear Mr. I-still-dress-like-a-dad-in-the-1940s."

The patriot shot her a deadpanned look, noticing the teasing smile and sighing to himself. "Fine, I'll just…dress like normal."

"Trust me, it'll be worth it."

He watched as she skipped passed him as he opened their apartment door and sticking her tongue out as she disappeared behind the door to her room. Shaking his head, he headed to his own room to shower and change.

Alice was quick to shower before beginning the process of getting dressed herself. She decided on a black button up blouse that she tucked into a pair of high-waist dress trousers of a light grey with a black plaid pattern weaving through the fabric that tapered at the ankle and finishing the look off with a pair of black heeled boots. Normally Alice wouldn't put much effort into her style, but since she was seeing Rebecca she wanted to at least look put-together to some degree. Once she was dressed she set to drying the mess of multihued waves that made up her hair, deciding to leave the locks natural instead of trying to straighten the mess of waves as she knew it would take too much time and effort the mutant didn't want to take away from making herself look more human as the woman who stared back at her appeared as if a shell and she frowned. She took in the dark circles and sunken cheekbones and sighed, knowing that if she didn't try to disguise it, Rebecca would hold no quarter in pointing it out to her.

Rebecca Barnes had done much for her over the last few decades and especially when she had escaped from the lab as she had steadily talked the mutant off of the ledge more times than she cared to admit. The eldest Barnes sister had forced her into getting herself back together after her revenge kick and guided her into being a working citizen once again and Alice knew she could never repay the woman for all she had done for her.

After styling her fringe and adding products to her hair as well as adding make up where needed, the mutant stepped from her room to see that Steve was waiting for her in the kitchen dressed in simple khaki slacks and a smart looking button up shirt beneath a cream colored cable knit sweater. As he looked up he smiled before taking note of the second necklace around her neck. "Where'd that one come from?"

"Thor. Apparently in his culture it's meant to guide the lost…and I also think it's rude to turn down a present so there's that."

"True," the patriot chuckled before handing the mutant her jacket as well as one of her thick wool sweaters. "Trust me, it's still cold out."

"Good god what would I do without you?"

"I'm sure you'd be fine, but you'd have significantly less reminders littering the fridge."

Alice snorted, tugging the sweater over her head and adjusting the collar of her shirt to rest against the neck of the sweater, "I'd also have significantly less cartons of milk."

"Maybe, but you'd also have your jackets and sweaters all over the place and let's not even mention the blankets you never put away."

"You make me sound like the most untidy person," she snickered. "Not all of us can be super clean freaks."

Steve shrugged, adjusting his jacket and watching as she tugged on her own and grabbing her purse off of the coat rack, "Well, not all of us here grew up sick all the time."

"I can't even argue that."

"Figured you couldn't," he smirked before the expression fell and was replaced with confusion. "We aren't taking Rumsfeld?"

"Unfortunately not for this," Alice smiled, "he's got a date with Thor I'd imagine. I swear that dog loves the Asgardian more than he loves anyone else here."

"I mean from one golden retriever to another?"

"Did you just compare Thor to a golden retriever?"

Steve, realizing what he had just inferred smirked, "Maybe?"

"Noted," the mutant snorted with a wide grin. "Anyway, from what I understand, yes. Apparently it's a thing Asgardians are born knowing where they can understand any language and speak it fluently upon hearing it? I think he called it _allspeak_ and I suppose dogs fall under that category."

"That's actually kind of neat."

"That's what I said!"

Steve shook his head as the two stepped into the elevator, the mutant pressing the lobby button before he sighed softly to himself, "You look nice by the way."

"Thanks. I just know if I didn't try to make an effort my dear friend would point it out to me with laser focus."

"Who is this friend of yours if you don't mind me asking?"

Alice smirked up at him and offered him a wink, "That's my little secret of course…can't spoil any surprises for either one of you."

"Al…"

"It's not a bad surprise, I promise!"

Steve shot her a wary look, "I'm not sure I like surprises when you're the one behind them…last time you had a surprise it was the videos they had me do for kids all throughout Times Square."

The mutant immediately smiled at the memory before shooting him an apologetic look when he groaned, "Okay, yeah not a super great surprise then, _but_ pranks aren't surprises. Also, I distinctly remember that being in retaliation of you picking out all of the marshmallows out of my cereal and resealing it with a picture of you and Natasha with the marshmallows at the bottom of the box."

"It was harmless!"

"Harmless?! You pinned it on Sam and we didn't speak to each other for three days!"

"It was still harmless."

"So was blasting your ' _don't do_ drugs' and ' _stay in school_ ' ads all over Times Square, pal."

Steve's lips curled into a smile, "You know what the best one we pulled was?"

"The one on Sam?" Alice snickered as she looked up at the patriot and earning a loud laugh as a reply. "I remember we traded the Gatorades out with food colored salt water."

"I don't think I've ever seen him so mad."

"To be fair," She giggled, "that was well after Sam sabotaged your art supplies and my desktop in the office so I think it was fair play."

The blonde laughed as the two of them made their way down the busy streets of Midtown. The two of them continued to banter as they made their way in and out of a few stores before the patriot finally decided to ask about her purchases, "So any reason why you're buying plants?"

"Well it's something Xavier and I spoke about this morning," She explained, shouldering her bag and handing one of her other bags off to Steve when he offered (Alice knew better than to refuse the patriot's help as he was still very much a gentlemen from the 1940s). "He looked through my memories and was able to pin point my ability and narrow it down."

"That's great news, Al. I know it's been bothering you recently…"

She sighed softly, "Yeah it has. When Pierce had me he talked about resubmitting me for experimentation because they were sure my genes could unlock immortality, but my thoughts are leaning more towards them mistaking _hyper-regeneration_ for _immortality_."

"I wouldn't have let that happen," Steve declared with a deep scowl tugging at his lips. "I promise you'll never go through that again."

Alice offered him a weak smile, "I know so long as you're around, Steve, you wouldn't stand by and watch it happen…just don't make promises that you can't keep."

"HYDRA is gone…we defeated the last head just this morning, Al, they're not going to get you."

The mutant forced a smile to her face as she agreed, but she knew differently. She had discovered at least three more bases that she and Wade were scheduled to take down over the next few weeks and while she desperately wanted to tell Steve that he was wrong and that HYDRA wouldn't be gone until every last person who shared their ideology was dead, she remained silent. Not only would this news ruin his sense of victory, but it would also expose what she had been up to over the last few months and Alice believed that the less people who were involved in her work at present the better. She didn't want to be responsible for the death of any of her teammates let alone the death of Captain America. At least with Wade she knew that he wouldn't die from bullet wounds as he shook off fatal injuries much faster than even she did. No, she decided, she would keep the information to herself and continue her work. If it meant that Bucky would be safe she knew risking everything else would be worth it.

"Anyway, my mutation has a sub-class…which isn't uncommon in most regenerative types of mutations, or so I'm told. But I can manipulate things at the cellular level."

"Cells…? As in cells in your body?"

"Yeah…though I'm not practiced enough to work on _people_ just yet…so the Professor recommended I work on plants to start."

"That's actually not a bad idea…if you have to start from basics in order for you to develop your power then I say do whatever you have to, but make sure it's something _you_ want."

Alice smiled softly, truly flattered that the patriot cared so much, "Thanks Steve…and I promise that this is something that I want. If I can change the course of even one person's life because I can heal them or take on their ailment I want to at least try."

"Okay," the patriot smiled after a moment of considering the woman's words, "then you easily have my support."

With another smile, the mutant easily looped her arm through his and began dragging him towards Lincoln Plaza where Juilliard School resided. While the two walked they began chatting about mundane things as if in silent agreement to not bring up work not only because they were out in public, but it was clear that neither wanted to bring down the good mood that had settled over them. The walk from Midtown to Lincoln Plaza was about 30 minutes and while the weather was chilly it was a relatively beautiful day and neither of them wanted to be cramped into a taxi or take the subway since Steve didn't like taking taxis and Alice felt claustrophobic in the subways. As the two approached the school, Steve finally stopped and forcing Alice to stop with him.

"Alright…who are we seeing?"

The mutant's face softened for a moment before a warm smile tugged at her lips, "Do you remember how last May I told you that I stay in contact with Bucky's sisters?"

"Yeah."

"Well, we're having lunch with Rebecca." She watched as the name registered on Steve's features and after a moment there was a look of both excitement and dread. "If it's of any consolation, she already knows about Bucky…she, um, called me out on it over the phone this morning."

"The call I walked in on…you were talking to Becca."

The relief in the patriot's voice was tangible and it brought a small frown to the mutant's lips, "Yeah, who else would I have said _love you_ to? Did you think I was talking to some random person?"

"No, no!" Steve was quick to correct, his features relaxing, "I've just never heard you say it to anyone before so it was just…odd."

The brunette stared at him for a few moments before shaking her head and sighing as she tucked her jacket closer to her slight frame, "Whatever you say, Steve."

He cleared his throat and offered her a sheepish smile, "She already knows about Buck?"

"It was on the news and I'm sure she, Lottie and Marie know what their brother looks like…unless they think it's just a weird doppelganger. They handled me being alive and not aging well enough, but I don't know how they would take knowing their brother was alive and the longest running POW in the history of ever." She ran a hand through her hair, "Regardless she knows, but didn't really give me a full reaction so I don't know exactly what to prepare for, but she doesn't know you're the one I brought with me so it's kind of a surprise for her."

Steve stared at her for a few moments before chuckling, "You're trying to distract her from you."

"No!" She was quick to respond before sighing in resignation when Steve shot her a disbelieving look, "maybe…okay _maybe_!"

"That's what I thought."

"Gee make me feel like an ass why don't you?"

"Only when you deserve it," he snorted. Ignoring the smug look on his face she looped her arm through his and led him into the school. After a few moments of him looking around, he looked down at the mutant, "So, what does Becca do now?"

"She's a professor here," Alice answered with a proud smile. "She's an accomplished singer and teaches diction lessons and piano on the weekends, but the main course she teaches is _The History of Singing_. It's fascinating really; she let me sit in on a class a back in 2003 as a matter of fact."

Steve stared down at the mutant, "I didn't know she went into music."

"She taught piano for many years and sang in choirs and…I think it was in the 60's she had a run on Broadway for a bit. She got really into it after Bucky died."

"I'm not surprised. She always wanted to do something with music when we were all growing up. It's nice to know she's still doing it." Steve smiled, his eyes faraway for a moment as if recalling memories. Despite knowing that he was only half listening, the mutant pointed out different places within the school and points of interest already aware that Rebecca would more than likely want to show him around as well. After a short while, the blonde sighed softly, "You know what's funny?"

"What?"

"Growin' up, Buck used to always say that Becca had a crush on me."

A feline-like smirk curled at her lips suddenly, "Oh is that so?"

"I never believed him because she was always a sister to me. Just makes you wonder if he was pulling my leg or not."

"Well, you'll be able to ask her today."

A smile curled at the patriots lips as well, "You may be right…you think I got a shot?" Alice laughed, knowing that Steve was joking, and merely tugged him along where they were beginning to hear the sound of a piano and the sounds of singing. As the two came up to the classroom, the mutant stopped at the window to see Rebecca, now an elderly woman, sitting at the piano and a younger woman standing across from her with what looked like sheet music.

The student had long blonde hair that framed her shoulders in thick layers (a beanie on her head no doubt because she hadn't bothered to take it off from when she was outside), blue eyes that were brought out by the light traces of makeup she wore. She wore a bright red, oversized sweater and a pair of skinny jeans that bore patches along the legs that clearly served as a fashion choice as opposed to necessity with what Alice could tell were a pair of converse. She was pretty, Alice decided, with a lovely voice and the mutant had heard many over the years including many of Rebeca's students.

Rebecca herself was dressed in black turtleneck with a matching blazer that was emblazoned with white polka dots and a pair of white dress pants synched at her waist, her feet clad in a pair of black kitten heels. Her light brown hair was highlighted with blonde and streaks of grey that showed her age, but one thing that always impressed Alice in regards to the Barnes sisters was their ability to age like fine wine. Rebecca was every bit as beautiful at ninety three as she was when she was in her twenties. As she played the piano she hummed along with the song to allow her student to follow along with her as it was clear the two of them were just starting this piece.

Alice quietly stepped into the room and motioning for Steve to join her, the patriot moving in slowly behind her as she removed her coat and tucking it over her arm. As the student hit the final note of the aria and Rebecca hit the final notes the two looked over, the student with a look of confusion on her features before recognition seemed to take place.

"Oh my god…I _know_ you!"

The mutant and patriot shared a look before it was quickly deduced that the student was speaking specifically about Steve and he offered her an awkward wave. "You were the waitress at that coffee shop uptown right? The one not far from Star – Avengers Tower."

"Holy crap…I can't believe you remember," She laughed, a blush lighting her cheeks before she cleared her throat and nodded. "Yeah, you were drawing at my table for a while."

"Sorry I took up the space."

"Trust me, it wasn't a problem."

Alice watched the volley of conversation between the young student and Steve before looking towards Rebecca with a pinched face as if surprised Steve seemed to almost be flirting with the young woman. Stepping to the side she ignored as the awkward conversation continued before reaching the elder woman's side and offering her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

"Oh it's so good to see you again!"

"You too Becca." After breaking from the hug, the mutant glanced over the piano briefly, "I take it you're working on _L'amour est un oiseau rebelle_ …Bizet if I recall, from _Carmen_ , 1875? It's been a long time since I've heard it and so well done," The mutant commented loud enough for the student to hear and earning an awkward laugh in return. Rebecca laughed once again before glancing off to her student.

"You should take the complement, Beth. Alice has the most trained ear I've ever seen and can tell when someone sings an aria well."

The blonde blinked in surprise, "You mean…you can sing too?"

"God no," Alice laughed. "I grew up listening to opera and the French ones are always hard to master especially as a mezzo since the roles are not as popular. You have a good teacher."

"I do," Beth agreed as she seemed to hug herself self-consciously, "she's great."

"Give yourself some credit, dear girl! Your audition will go off well enough; we'll make sure of it."

"Thank you Ms. Barnes."

Rebecca smiled at her before her eyes rested on Steve who stood awkwardly between the three women and her smile widened, "Well I'll be damned if that isn't Steve Rogers I'm seeing."

Beth had stepped away from the group as she gathered her things, her eyes widening and head snapping backwards when she heard Steve's name and Alice knew she had made the connection that the man she had just been speaking with was Captain America. Despite this revelation, it appeared as if she was going to attempt to act as naturally as she could – which the mutant gave her an A for effort – as she shuffled through her bag. Rebecca had stood from the bench of her piano and had thrown her arms around the taller man, Steve reacting immediately by bending down so he wasn't as tall and wrapping the woman in a tight hug. The mutant decided to strike a conversation up with the younger woman in an effort to give Steve and Rebecca some privacy, but found herself surprised when the young blonde spoke first.

"I can't believe that's Captain America…holy shit…no one's gonna believe me!" She mumbled, "I can't believe he knows my professor!"

"They grew up together believe it or not," Alice commented as she watched the reunion fondly. Beth glanced at her, her expression still poleaxed and surprised.

"If you don't mind me asking, are you his girlfriend?"

The mutant blinked before adamantly shaking her head, "Oh no. He's a handsome guy, a great friend and he'll make the right girl really happy one day, but he's…not exactly my type."

"Oh," Beth hummed before glancing at the mutant and taking in her features before her eyebrows shot up in surprise, "oh…oh my god…I remember you too! You're _Hellcat_. You had told us to get inside and out of the streets when those aliens started attacking civilians down from the library on 71st!"

Raking a hand through her hair, Alice nodded slowly, "That's what they call me, but please call me Alice or any other variant. Tony thinks he's hilarious."

"I honestly can't believe this…you guys are heroes!" She cried as she made wide gestures with her hands, "You, the Avengers, saved my life a few years ago! Oh wow, thank you! I don't think I ever got to say that before…I know they interviewed me on TV, but…just wow!"

The mutant chuckled awkwardly as she tried brushing off the young woman's gratitude and pressing it onto the others. Alice didn't want any praise from the Battle of New York and consistently mentioned the other Avengers whenever she could and not because she didn't appreciate the gratitude of those that had been saved, but because she deeply feared losing her anonymity. After a few moments of excited chattering from the young woman, she seemed to sense the mutant's anxiety and blushed brightly in embarrassment.

"I – I'm sorry, I'm just so surprised you know my teacher and that you're all here and…it's just –"

"Exciting," Alice interrupted with a small, knowing smile, "I get it trust me. Admittedly, your reaction was much better than mine was when I got lumped in with these guys, but they're good people." She watched as the patriot and older woman pulled apart with Rebecca blotting her eyes with a handkerchief and then wiping Steve's with a wide smile. "Some are still just trying to live with the aftershocks of what they believed was the end and some are merely trying to pretend that it never happened."

Beth watched the expressions on the mutant's face before her brows pinched, her body slumping into the seat next to her belongings, "And which are you?"

She thought about the question for a long moment before frowning, "I suppose I'm a little of both." Alice looked back at the young woman and offered her a pinched smile, "What are you auditioning for, if you don't mind me asking?"

"Oh! Um, I have a recital coming up where a large group of Broadway directors are going to be in attendance and since I'm graduating this year I want to make sure I have a job to go to." Beth rambled before clearing her throat, "My mom is really into theater and going to shows and I always wanted to be in theater to some degree. When I was a kid all I wanted to do was be Annie and then I wanted to be Belle from _Beauty and the Beast_ , but I'll take anything just to get my foot in the door, y'know?"

"I do and if Rebecca is saying that you'll have little trouble I would believe her." Alice smiled as she crossed her arms over her chest, "she's incredibly intuitive and you have a great voice. If those big heads at Broadway can't see that then they're idiots."

The young woman smiled as she shuffled her feet, a nervous habit that she seemed to have before she looked back up at the mutant, "Thanks…it really it means a lot." She glanced at her watch and immediately jumped. "Oh shit, I gotta go. Ms. Barnes thanks again for taking time out with me today. I gotta get to work!" She then turned to glance at both Alice and Steve with a small smile on her face and a blush lighting her cheeks, "hopefully I'll see you guys around."

"Of course dear, be safe out there."

"Sure," Steve smiled at the same time Alice replied with a _definitely_. The blonde waved as she ran from the room and down the hall, disappearing into the near vacant hallways that made up the preforming arts school. The patriot turned his attention back to Rebecca who had walked to the side to grab her jacket, "So, you kept your last name?"

"Oh I was married back in '53 Stevie," She chuckled, thanking him when he immediately took her coat and held it for her and allowing her to slide her arms into the respective sleeves. "Divorced about ten years or so later and retook my name. Tom was a drunk and I kicked his ass out faster than he could say sorry. Kids all took on my last name."

"Kids!?"

"Oh yes," Rebecca smirked. "You didn't think all of us were all goody-two-shoes now did ya? I _was_ married, after all. Two sons and a daughter, who are all married and have kids of their own. Lottie and Marie had four kids each and have grandkids already."

Steve smiled, nearly ignoring when Alice sided next to him with her own jacket pulled back over her shoulders, "That's great! I'm sorry about your ex-husband…you know if me or Buck had any say he wouldn't have stuck around."

"Don't I know it?! Alice here tried for years to keep me from marrying him, but I was stubborn and didn't want to listen much back then."

The mutant giggled, "That's true. And the _last_ person you wanted advice from was me." The three began walking from the building and to where they were going for lunch. "But I'm glad you got out when you did."

"Won that settlement too," Rebecca smirked as she looped her arm through the mutant's and laughed. "I was able to put the kids through school and now I get to spoil my grandkids rotten and teach easily the most relaxed classes of any other tenured professor. But the best part is I get two important people back in my life."

"You're cute, Becca." The mutant smiled, "How're the kids?"

"Oh gosh! George runs his own restaurant in Flushing and is planning to _retire_. I'm ninety three years old and I'm still going! Anyway, his wife Barbara is still working as a social worker, bless that woman's heart." She smiled and looking up at Steve as he stood beside them at a traffic light. "James, named for Bucky of course, just managed to score the new contract he had needed for his contracting company upstate and Patti is still teaching art classes in the elementary schools. And of course, Maggie is a full time lawyer and Richard, that poor man, is still working as freight manager!"

"He had an accident a few years ago," Alice stage-whispered back to Steve for context as she was dragged along.

Steve smiled as he listened to his friend's sister ramble about her kids. It had been a long time and the now elderly woman was just as much a spitfire as he remembered her to be as she practically pulled the mutant with her through the crowds uncaring of those she may bump into and assuring Alice multiple times that they would move if they valued their feet and laughing when the mutant merely grumbled. After a few moments they had reached the restaurant that Rebecca announced she frequented often when she was near campus and continued to express how much they were going to love it. As they were seated, the patriot looked over the table at the woman and sighed softly.

"You have grandkids now too, right?"

"Oh Stevie you'd love them! As a matter of fact, Phil, Maggie and Richard's youngest, is convinced you're made up...well that the recent you isn't the same as the man that lived during World War II. I can't tell you how many times he's gone to D.C. to look through that display and point out everything wrong with it. It's gotten to the point he's actually convinced that Bucky was _drafted_!" Alice and Steve shared an awkward smile as Rebecca continued unremitting as she opened her menu, "I told him that you were very much real and _are_ very much real and that Bucky, while I love him dearly, was just like dad was: brave, self-sacrificing…goodness I think back sometimes and even I can't believe anyone said he was more like ma was."

"Last we spoke, Becca, Michael had just graduated with a doctorate in pediatrics." Steve shot the mutant a thankful look at the subject change as neither of them wanted to crush the bubble that Bucky's sister seemed to have encased herself in and while they both knew that they would need to come clean eventually, they also were aware that this was neither the time or the place. "How're the rest of the kids?"

"Yes, Michael is now a surgeon in Westchester Children's Hospital and got married to a lovely girl just this last year and is already expecting their first baby in June!" She leaned closer to Steve suddenly with a secretive smile, "He's one of George and Barbara's kids. David got married to a lovely man about two months back now and they've started a meadery I think it's called; beautiful place, you've gotta check it out sometime! It's just passed Times Square about two blocks. And Steven just graduated from NYU with a degree in dental hygiene." Rebecca listed off after their waiter took their order. "James and Patti's kids are still in school now. Charlie and Teresa just turned twenty four; Charlie is studying to become a music journalist and Teresa is studying music at Fordham to become a teacher, and Laura just started at SUNY Purchase for finance." She leaned on the table, blue eyes flashing from behind her recently placed reading glasses as she talked about her grandchildren and their lives, using her cell phone to show Steve pictures of each of them as Alice had been introduced at different times to each of them over the years. "Maggie and Richard's kids, goodness, don't tell anyone but they're my favorites!"

"That's because Maggie was always your favorite, Becca."

"Oh hush you!" The woman chastised her with a wave of her hand and a sly smirk on her face and a laugh, "I remember you spoiling my boys so I don't want to hear it!" She turned her attention back to Steve and pointed out each grandchild as she spoke about them, "William graduated top of his class in computer engineering and is in line to take on a position at Stark Industries at their California office in the next few weeks. Victoria is their wild child, already married and with two kids. She's the only one who took up the military lifestyle – married a fine gentleman in the Airforce and works as a banker down in Georgia. Darren just graduated with his undergraduate in marine biology and is set to start work out in Washington in the next week while he starts his graduate program and, Phil, is my oddball. He's studying history with a main focus of becoming a museum curator. Smart as a whip that boy, but his head is still in the clouds most days, but he's a good kid."

"They're beautiful, Becca," the patriot stated earnestly as he looked through the pictures. "You should be proud of the family you built."

"There was a time, Stevie, where all I wanted was for you to have a family of your own and for Bucky to have one of his own and with this woman. When Alice showed up one day on our doorstep back in 1947 I was so angry, but also pleasantly surprised that he was so invested in her." Alice nodded slowly, taking a sip of her water when Steve turned his eyes to her. "She wanted us to know how much we meant to him…apparently all he did was tell everyone about us!"

"He did," Alice chuckled. "All that man ever talked about was how much he loved you guys and that he wanted to be there to knock out the teeth of any boys who wanted to do you wrong."

Steve smiled, "At one point, he had a fella picked out for each of you."

"No he didn't."

"I swear on my title he did," the patriot grinned as the elder woman narrowed her eyes. "I think your letters were what helped him through a lot of the war."

Rebecca sighed softly, thanking the waiter when they brought her dish out and politely ignoring when Alice slipped the waiter her credit card. "Bucky was a good man and it took me a long time to get over his death…Ma never did recover from it, I think. She tried to for our sakes, but Bucky was everything to her. That poor woman, God rest her soul, worked until the day she died to make sure, Lottie, Marie and myself were all taken care of. Hell, she even helped me through my divorce!" She smiled as she looked up at the mutant, "Imagine my surprise when Alice shows up at my house with a key and an address and disappears for twenty years only to come back looking no older than she did in 1947."

"Did she not explain…?"

"I did," Alice answered with a tense smile. "After a lot of threats and considerations of insanity, I was able to get the explanation out before long. It was actually Becca who convinced me to go back out into the workforce…before I was picked up by S.H.I.E.L.D."

"That godforsaken division," Rebecca snorted derisively, "I told you after that New York nonsense that they were trouble. Low and behold, two years later they fall apart and my older brother turns out to be alive."

Steve laughed nervously, "I'm sorry Bec, we would've told you sooner, but with the way everything was happening we were trying to figure everything out too."

"Oh I know you were." Rebecca waved her hand dismissively, "That's why I'm not mad at you two for not reaching out sooner and especially at this one," she pointed her fork at Alice who smiled sheepishly, "You two have enough on your plates as Avengers now. I can handle Lottie and Marie."

Alice openly winced at the admission and Steve frowned, "They were angry?"

"Disbelieving, mostly," She sighed softly. "Lottie and Marie weren't much better than I was after everyone came back from the War…they just accepted Allie here faster than I did, happy enough to have some semblance of our brother back, but they took the news hard when they plastered his face all over the news. Just tell me you two are looking for him?"

"You know we are."

She glanced between the two of them and smiled, her relief completely transparent as her shoulders slouched slightly, "That's the best news I've heard in quite some time."

"I can easily promise you this, Becca," Steve stated as he placed his fork and knife down on the table. "We're not stopping until we find him and offer him whatever help he needs…whatever it takes."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well there we have it folks! 
> 
> There's a lot of information to this chapter as well as a lot of imagination happening. I'm realizing now how difficult it is to find hacking information without making my browser history look a nice ol' beacon for it to be flagged by the FBI, lol. So any hacking dialogue is made up :) 
> 
> Also, I realize that Rebecca Barnes is not in the MCU at all (which is a shame, honestly because she's kinda cool), but I wanted to add her in for a few reasons; the main reason being that she's a significant part of Alice's life outside of the Avengers (despite me not mentioning her before), and she still looks at her as a member of her family. I also know that she had a different occupation in the comics, but I wanted to add something a little different to the story and I thought having her be a music professor would be cool.
> 
> Beth, if you don't know, was the waitress from the first Avengers movie and I desperately wanted to add her in here just for flavor and if you've ever been to NYC you'd be surprised how small of a world it actually is with so many people. So this was just a fun little bit of spice I decided to add in for some flavor ;)
> 
> Next chapter: Tony throws a party, Alice hates parties and robots attack!
> 
> Thank you guys so much and I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving, if you celebrate it or are in the U.S. If not, have a great rest of your weekend!
> 
> xoxo Eirlys :D


	24. Welcome to the Party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before we begin with the chapter I just wanted to take a moment to do a few mentions!
> 
> Special thanks to **Jeriel, Cazzykat, neptune83 and the two guests** who recently gave kudos to this story as well as **Jen_MC, Dulce07 and HoeOfNjadaka** for bookmarking and finally **P.L.** for commenting! Even though you may not realize, it you absolutely inspire me to continue writing this story, so from the bottom of my heart thank you!
> 
> Now, onwards to the fic!

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**_Edited: 12/12/20 -_** Hi there, just fixed up some spelling/misplaced words or phrases/etc. Everything else has remained the same so there's no reason to reread this chapter if you already have, but for those just seeing this it'll look all nice and pretty...hopefully, lol! Enjoy~!

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_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Deadpool_ **/|\** _Age of Ultron_ _  
__24_

After the lunch with Steve and Rebecca on Thursday, the two Avengers had returned to the tower and had gone their separate ways. Steve had been dragged into a meeting with Maria about the next steps now that they had secured Loki's scepter and Alice had quickly made her way back down to her lab to practice her newly found ability within her mutation as well as work on modifying her _Override_ suit: specifically the mask.

Her mask merely served as a way to completely obscure her identity and was a smooth curved surface in order to fully hide any distinct features. This normally left her bracer as the main source of programming for the suit as it acted as a computer. After careful consideration, she decided to move some of the software into her mask so that she could identify things quicker and scan things more efficiently. In her _Hellcat_ suit, Alice had asked Tony to make the mask cover everything but her eyes in an effort to fully mask her identity while on missions with the Avengers, merely having a curved shield in front of her eyes that displayed the information she needed at any given time much like Tony's helm did with JARVIS that could appear and rescind whenever she told it to.

As she tinkered with the software she made sure to add the prototype program (now fully updated and added into the team's suits as well) that she had installed in Natasha's phone a few years ago to help her pick up on oil residue to pick out codes. She then added a program that was meant to show heat signatures and lastly a program that helped her matrix a building to scan the best point of entry and exit points. After testing out each component she made sure to add her facial recognition software into it in order to make certain she was going after actual HYDRA members and not body doubles as she and Wade had run into that problem before – though it had been quickly rectified. With the waves caused by the Avengers hunting HYDRA's main heads the other, smaller rats scurried into the darker corners to wait for the right moment to strike and the mutant didn't want to let them have an inch.

This ate up much of her day and the final thing she had been able to install into the body of her suit was a device meant to tightly fold the fabric into the compact space (which she designed to resemble a compact mirror) as her helmet was already stored in the small circular devices she wore over her ears. She wanted to be certain that if she ever had to sneak back into the tower, the only thing that the Avengers may have noticed was her bracer, which she rarely left without anyway. Upon returning to her apartment that she shared with Sam and Steve she had immediately retreated into her room to sleep, desperately hoping her night would not be plagued by nightmares.

She had been disappointed and so she spent much of the rest of that night in their shared office working on school work.

Friday morning she had left the tower early to go to her classes, receiving a text from Steve half way through her last lecture that had simply read: _Sam's back_. She had made an excuse to leave, claiming a family emergency and had nearly run back to the tower and while her hopes weren't high, she desperately hoped that the former Pararescuer had more information or a lead on where Bucky had gone if only to confirm what she already suspected.

What she was greeted with was not what she expected.

"And this is Alice," Sam introduced to the woman standing at his side with a smile. "Technically this is her place and she lets us crash, but Alice, this is my sister Monica."

"It's such a pleasure to meet you!" The woman smiled widely as she shook Alice's hand enthusiastically, "Gosh he didn't say how pretty you are! _Sam_ you holdin' out on me?!"

Alice's brows arched in surprise, "Um, nice to meet you too?"

Monica was tall – granted _everyone_ was tall in comparison to Alice – with melanin rich skin that seemed to glow and expressing a youthful quality that most were envious of. The sides of her head were shaved and her textured hair styled in a mohawk that formed into a voluminous ponytail of thick and smoothed coils with beads littered throughout. She was dressed in what the mutant could only guess was travel clothes as she donned a pair of leggings, sneakers and a loose sweatshirt that had her university's name emblazoned on the front. Her face was long with a wide set nose, almond eyes and high and sharp cheekbones and she wore traces of makeup that only highlighted her features to make them stand out. Monica was a beautiful woman and was like a hurricane of animated enthusiasm and sweetness that nearly made Alice's teeth hurt with how hard she was clenching them. Her body suddenly tensed as Monica hugged her briskly before dancing off into the kitchen and helping herself to a water bottle before sweeping through the living room and back to where Sam had his bedroom with a cry expressing she was dropping off her bag.

"Sam… _what the fuck_!?"

The former Pararescuer offered the mutant an awkward smile, the small brunette clearly ignoring the noise of disapproval that came from Steve from where he leaned on the small kitchenette. "She was staying in New York and I wanted to spend some time with her before she goes back to Europe…fashion bloggers and all. I told her to play it cool, but she's kind of obsessed with you."

"Look," Alice grimaced as she pinched her nose to stave off her quickly incoming headache as the patriot snorted a laugh, "I don't care…what I want to know is what you found out."

" _Do you guys mind if I take a shower_!?"

Steve watched in amusement as the mutant very visibly face palmed and Sam laughed nervously before calling back a simple _yes_ to his sister who chirped a quick _thanks_ in reply. The man sighed, running a hand over his textured hair before pulling out a few photographs he had taken on his trip and forcing the mutant and patriot closer in order to get a good look. "These were all I got…I don't know what you can make out of these, but given you're so good with tech I figured you could clean them up."

Alice took the photos in her hand, passing one to Steve as she looked the film over with pinched brows. The image was of a set of buildings that looked like a dilapidated housing unit that led to a series of alleys. There weren't many discernable people shown in the photo, but Alice could make out the vague silhouette of a body emerging from the mouth of what appeared to be the main alley. "Where were these taken?"

Sam watched as Steve and Alice traded the photos before examining the next set before sighing, "These were out in San Francisco. If this is our guy, it looks like he's not planning on sticking around."

"These are warehouses," Steve commented as he showed Alice the image he was holding – the third photo that neither of them had gotten to look at just yet – as a frown tugged at the mutant's lips. "Do you think it's possible to clean these up?"

The mutant nodded, running a hand briefly through her hair, "Oh, it's possible…but while they're suspicious I don't think it's him." She then gestured to the close up of the man shown in the picture, "The stance is wrong and the distance in the stride is off. Bucky's arm displaces his weight since it weighs more than a regular arm and he compensates for it with his walk…I noticed it on the bridge where we encountered him the first time in D.C. That and Bucky's hips are just a bit wider and this guy's bowlegged, Bucky isn't."

"Well even still I wanna know who it is this way we can definitely cross this guy off as being Buck."

It went unsaid that it was surprising that Alice would know the difference between Bucky's hips to someone else, but Steve wisely let his questions drop as he was aware he would find out more about his best friend's relationship than even he wanted to know.

"Right," Alice said after an awkward paused, clearly realizing the same thing that Steve and Sam did before grabbing the pictures and forcing a smile. "I'm just gonna take these and see what I can do."

The two men watched as the mutant quickly disappeared beyond the door of their shared office, not bothering to close the door - they noted with surprise - and tugging a pair of headphones onto her head and only briefly turning to scan the pictures onto her desktop. Sam glanced back at the patriot, a concerned frown on his face as he studied the expression of suspicion twisting the blonde's features.

"Was there somethin' I missed?"

Steve looked back at the man and sighed, "She's been acting off recently…well, more so than usual."

"That look on your face, man, isn't one of concern," Sam pointed out as he walked back into the kitchen and helped himself to a bottle of water. "Look, we both know Alice snuck out of the tower the other night, but she's not obligated to tell us anything and there's nothin' saying we can't leave on a whim…so what gives?"

The patriot sighed, splaying his hands onto the countertop of the kitchenette. He knew that Sam served as a checks and balances between himself and Alice especially when the two began acting cagy around one another and he appreciated the man for that reason. The former Pararescuer did _not_ pull punches and he definitely didn't take sides until he had the full story and it easily made him invaluable to the pair. As he considered the man's words he looked back up at him to see that Sam was waiting with his arms crossed and a brow arching towards his hairline as he leaned back against the sink, his face a mask of disappointment.

"You're right…of course you're right, but that whole interaction wasn't weird to you?"

"Oh it was weird," Sam nodded after he took a sip of water, "but what's weirder is your reaction to it. I mean she's studied Barnes's file more extensively than we have – as a matter of fact I don't think I've seen that girl look past the medical notes at all. I just don't get why you think it's suspicious that she knows the difference between her man and someone else just by a look at physicality. As a med student she'd be able to tell the difference between two strangers easily...but with someone she knows against a stranger? Are you really that surprised?"

When Steve remained silently contemplating, Sam sighed deeply.

"As far as the other thing, she's a grown ass woman. As much as we don't like it she's more than entitled to making decisions without our opinions or consent. The only thing we can do is be here if and when she decides to clue us in onto whatever she's doin'."

"I get that, really I do…and I know how it comes across, but I can't help but be concerned. As much as I hate to say it: she's not the same woman she was last May and I just want my friend back. I trust her, don't get me wrong, of _course_ I do, but…"

Sam's brow furrowed as he watched the man's face crumble slightly in defeat before striding forward and placing a firm, yet comforting hand on the man's shoulder. "I get it man…and trust me it's the worst position to be in. Monica had to do it with me when I hit my lowest point, but take it from someone who's been there once or twice: don't smother her. Let Al come back to you when she needs the help. Barnes is a sore subject for the two of you and if I didn't know any better I'd really believe you two were related because you two are _the_ most stubborn people I've ever met." Sam considered it a success when the patriot snorted on a laugh and he sighed softly, "She'll come around and if she's doin' something without us she'll clue us in when it becomes important. Just remember that when you get mad at her next time."

"I'll do my best."

"That's all we can ask for." The former Pararescuer smiled widely before gesturing back to where his sister had disappeared into his room. "Now the question is: how do we deal with my sister?"

"She's…lively."

"Nicer word than I woulda used," Sam muttered. "I mean…I guess I can let Alice and her work out organically, but if I do that I think the mutant will kill her and hide the body."

"Maybe we find a way to keep her busy…maybe take her around the city?"

Sam considered this for a moment and nodded, "You wanna come?"

Steve noted the pleading look from the man before offering him a small smile, "I say we go grab Natasha…she's good at talking people down."

As the two men corralled the younger woman into some semblance of being ready to leave with the promise of showing her around Stark Tower, neither noticed the deep frown that had set on the mutant's face as she studied the face of a man she wasn't certain she would ever see again.

**-0-**

Saturday morning quickly approached and the first thing she had done was sneak out of her room after changing from her pajamas, grabbing one of her premade protein shakes (peanut butter, chocolate and banana - her favorite, admittedly) and nearly sprinting to her lab. She found herself with the cleaned up pictures that Sam had taken in San Francisco spread across her workbench. She hadn't bothered to look closer at the images after clearing that the man in the photos wasn't Bucky. An odd sense of familiarity had seized her throat when she had first looked at the photo of the man as he looked scarily similar to her, but there was a sliver of doubt that crept into her mind and she couldn't remember why. The images had been brought down to her lab in order for her to file them away for later use, but she had yet to actually find a place for them just yet.

Instead she returned her attention to Bucky's file (that she had condensed into two separate folders: one for his medical and the second for the missions they had sent him on). With a few keystrokes and a wave of her hand his medical file appeared as a 3D rendering in front of her and she quickly brought up the schematics for his arm as well as notes about the serum he had been given over the course of a few years since 1945. She knew Steve would be stopping by at some point that morning to donate a small amount of blood so that she could begin figuring out the differences between the serum given to Bucky and the serum given to the patriot.

She and the patriot had agreed early on that they needed to know exactly the limits of Bucky's new _power_ and how he was nearly able to take Steve on without breaking much of a sweat. The only thing they had come up with was that the key difference between the former sniper and the patriot had been that Bucky already knew how to fight – being a boxer during his teenage years – and that his mind was extremely technical and analytical and that was what had given him an edge despite Steve's training within S.H.I.E.L.D. The two of them knew that Bucky had been a natural sniper because his mind could easily form equations and work out physics faster than anyone else they knew and Steve had admitted that he had always been envious of his friend for how quickly he could come up with a solution.

" _It's because you're a creative." Alice had said back in July to Steve. "You're able to think outside of the box and that makes you more dynamic in your solutions. Bucky's mind works in a more linear way where he's able to connect dots faster, but it's also his downfall because he can become easily frustrated if he can't solve something. Adaptability is key when it comes to solving problems and quickly. The reason you won that fight at all was because you went against the training he was undoubtedly given."_

_Natasha had nodded from where she was on video chat with the two of them, "She's not wrong Steve. The training I received was meant for espionage so it was meant to be flexible. Given what we know about HYDRA, I sincerely doubt he was trained in anything but battle tactics." There was a haunted expression on her face, but the mutant and patriot were wise enough not to ask._

Alice began using her stylus to highlight certain parts of the schematics as she began working out the make and function of his arm in order to determine how it _worked_. She knew based on the file that it had taken several surgeries before his body had accepted the metal prosthetic which told her that it was anchored into his person in some way – be that by binding the metal to flesh, the muscle structure or to nerves she wasn't certain, but she had her theories. She was in the middle of working through the details of the file when she heard the elevator just beyond her lab open and nearly groaned when she heard Sam and Monica's chatter.

It wasn't that Alice was _avoiding_ the woman, but Sam's sister made her genuinely uncomfortable.

A few moments later the Wilson siblings and Steve had arrived at her lab and the patriot smiled apologetically as he stepped in, "Sorry to bug you, Al, but you needed that sample?"

"Yes." She replied, blue-light cancelling glasses perched on her nose. "All I really need is barely a drop. I shouldn't need more than that since the serum was integrated into the blood stream."

The patriot frowned softly in confusion, "How'd you figure that out."

"Simply put I worked it out from…personal experience." She answered vaguely and ignoring the pointed look he shot her in return.

Monica was surprisingly quiet as she watched the exchange, her eyes tracing the information floating about the lab with interest. Alice ignored this and reached into one of her tables and pulled out an alcohol swab, lancet, latex gloves and a microscope slide as the patriot rolled up his sleeve. She pulled the gloves onto her hands and glanced back at Steve with a frown. "What're you doing?"

"You need to take blood right?"

She smirked at him, "No, I just need your finger actually."

The patriot nodded slowly as he rolled his sleeve back down and watched her get everything else that she needed. Alice was quick and efficient as she prepared what she needed, stepping to him and wiping his finger with the alcohol swab and pressing the lancet to his finger and hitting the button. Steve barely felt the pinch at the tip of his finger and blinked when she removed the device and pinched the tip of his finger between her thumb and forefinger and assisting the blood to coming to surface; after a short moment a small globe of blood appeared and she nodded to herself, grabbing her slide and turning his finger so the top was facing upwards and to allow the blood to drop onto the slide. She placed the slide on the counter before taking a dropper he had not seen before and adding a single drop of solution to it and placing a slide cover over top of it, loading into the clips on the microscope. It took her less than a moment to take a new alcohol swab and wipe his finger before handing him a piece of folded gauze and instructing him to pinch his thumb and forefinger together to hold the cloth in place.

"So what do you do?" Monica asked after a moment of silence as Alice cleaned up the area, ejecting the needle for the lancet into the sharps container she had off to the side. Her question was not impolite, in fact, it was perhaps the tamest question that the mutant had been asked in comparison to her teammates and she turned back to the woman with a small smile.

"I'm a practiced nurse, but act as a support member for the team."

"That's not true," Steve frowned as she turned away from them, pushing her glasses up onto her head since she didn't actually need them to see. "Alice is the team's hacker and nurse in most cases. Yes, she has a more supportive role, but she makes sure we're not getting taken by surprise."

Monica's eyes lit up, "So you're like Judi Dench in 007! What was her name Sam?"

"M."

"Yeah!"

Alice ignored the bantering behind her as she examined Steve's blood, frowning slightly as she turned to the table and dropping Bucky's arm schematic and pulling up the formula equation she had been able to decipher from Zola's scratched notes and began writing. The siblings quieted when they got no response from the mutant and she began quickly writing out an equation, the computer translating her hasty writing into legible script as she continued, pausing only for a moment to use her phone's calculator and continuing.

Steve's eyes bounced back and forth between the mutant as well as the Wilson siblings before he watched the equations forming on the screen. He had never much been into science, but had humored Bucky many times as his best friend had been enamored with technology and the many possibilities that the future could hold and he had _especially_ been into anything that could potentially fly. The patriot allowed himself a moment to reminisce before he heard the mutant begin muttering to herself.

"Do you mind cluing us in here, Frankenstein?"

Alice spared a brief moment to shoot an unimpressed look at Sam before noticing that the three occupants of her lab were staring at her expectantly. Finally she sighed, her eyes flickering to Monica, "None of what I say is to leave this room…I mean it. I find this on any blog site or anywhere on the internet there will be problems." The woman nodded immediately, making the motion of _cross my heart, hope to die_ , before the mutant continued. "I barely took a sample of your blood because I wanted to compare it to the formula used in Erskine's version of the serum to Zola's, as you well know. With that small sample I can conclude a few things: one – the serums are not the same, but they are scary similar, two – each serum is meant to highlight what is already there and three – if knowledge of this leaves this room I can guarantee there will be an arms race for it."

"What do you mean?" Steve frowned as he crossed his arms, his eyes narrowed on the petite woman across the lab from him.

The mutant's face became deadpanned as she sighed, "Did anyone in S.H.I.E.L.D bother to tell you how many times Project Rebirth had been reinstated?" When the man shook his head she nodded slowly, "I figured they wouldn't. After you, Project Rebirth was worked on two additional times."

"I'm sorry…" Sam frowned, "but I'm not familiar with... _Project Rebirth_?"

Steve sighed, "It was the program I had willingly enlisted into in order to get clearance to go to war. It was a program being run by Doctor Abraham Erskine with the SSR to help combat the Nazi regime and stop Johan Schmidt."

"And the only reason _why_ it was approved was because Erskine had said that he could use it on the U.S. Army to ensure victory," Alice chirped from the side and earning a glare from the patriot.

"I was the test subject…if it worked with me they were going to multiply the formula for others chosen by Erskine…but he never got the chance."

Sam nodded in understanding before gesturing the mutant to continue. "After you went under in the ice, it became an arms race of sorts. The Germans wanted it in the 40s to combat allied forces, but because Erskine had defected to the U.S. they couldn't get hold of his research and then after the war Howard Stark continued working on the formula himself…failing multiple times due to a timely intervention by a Miss Peggy Carter." She shot a meaningful look at Steve who sighed softy, leaning back into the counter of her lab as he digested the news. "I convinced Tony into letting me see Howard's research notes from when I was…not around…and it made mention that your blood had gone missing. There's only one person I can think of that would be ballsy enough to risk preventing the world of more super soldiers."

"Of course she would," Steve chuckled morosely to himself as he ran a hand down the length of his face. "She was against using it at random anyway."

"As she should have been," Alice frowned. "Howard's notes stop at December 10th, 1991…six days before his death where he said he had information regarding Project Rebirth that he had to show to the director of S.H.I.E.L.D at the time...which I actually believe was Peggy, but I digress." A strange look appeared on the patriot's face, a look of recognition that did not escape her perception, "Did…you know something about this, Steve?"

"No, it…just doesn't surprise me is all."

He was terrible at lying, but the mutant let the moment go with a mental note to question him about it at a later time.

"Anyway, there's no other mention of Project Rebirth until September 21st, 2001…but, unfortunately, I don't have a whole lot of information about it other than that same year is when Bruce nearly destroyed Harlem."

Monica watched the discussion between the three with furrowed brows, "And…you're able to tell this based on a formula?"

Alice considered the woman for a moment, noting that she was genuinely interested and not merely humoring the conversation and she found herself nodding in approval. "Yes and no. The formula was showing the differences between the serum here," she gestured to the formula notated in red, "and the sample I just ran of Steve's blood. The two, at their core, are similar and therefore grant similar attributes. Enhanced strength, durability, speed, endurance, reflexes, stamina, intelligence, senses…so on and so forth. The key is that it enhances what is already there; _meaning_ , Steve here was so chalk full of piss and vinegar and _good_ that it made him into the perfect candidate for the program because he wasn't driven by selfishness or toxic masculinity."

"Thanks?"

"You're welcome," she chirped. "Now for this… _subject_ …they were given a similar serum in that it granted them enhanced strength, durability, speed, endurance, reflexes, stamina, senses, etcetera, etcetera. The key difference is that this person, while _good_ , had a different mindset and therefore it heightened a completely different aspect of their personality."

"Buc– I mean _they_ were incredibly focused, calculating…a perfectionist." Steve fumbled for a brief moment before catching himself as he quickly drew the same conclusion as Alice had. "Meaning they'd make the perfect assassin."

"It also helped that they were already groomed for it…prized sniper and all."

Monica frowned, "This…is all hypothetical, right?"

Alice was quick to nod, cutting Steve and Sam off before they could try to explain. "It is. We've been steadily working on a simulation in the event that someone was to ever have a similar serum to Steve here that we could and would be prepared for it."

"That actually makes sense," Monica smiled. "It's nice to know that you guys actually prepare for potential things to come about in the event we have another invasion, for example."

"We do our best that's for sure." The mutant smiled tightly, shaking her head and gesturing back to the formula before murmuring out of the corner of her mouth to Steve in French. " _It at least explains why he fought so hard and for so long…there's still hope._ "

Steve acknowledged the statement with a subtle nod.

"Well, now you know what Alice does Mo. Wanna see what Nat's up to?"

"That'd be so great!" Monica laughed with a clap of her hands, her eyes meeting the mutant's and a wide smile forming on her pretty features, "Thanks so much for letting me see your lab and what you do! I'm sure I'll see you at the party tonight."

"Party… _yay_!"

Steve snorted at the mutant's feigned enthusiasm and waved at the two siblings as they left; not missing the pointed look that the former Pararescuer shot him as he guided his sister from the lab. With a deep sigh he watched as Alice continued breaking down the formula before reaching over to where her microscope was settled and removing the slide, dipping it into a solution and watching as his blood dissolved. "What was that for?"

"I want to make sure that your sample is destroyed and I'll be doing the same to the formula. I know a lot of tricks that hackers will try and use in order to rip the formula out, but luckily I'm a tad more tenacious and a lot more petty."

He watched as she copied her notes into Bucky's file, coding it within phrasing that the two of them had used not too long ago – the code used by the Howling Commandos – and being sure to make it look as if it were a part of the file on purpose.

Alice was many things, he had learned over the last three years of having her consistently in his life and the main thing he could say was that she was clever. Since no one other than the Commandos knew the code (since they had legitimately made it up one night while on mission in Poland), it guaranteed that the formula for Erskine's serum would remain secret. The only people who could potentially break that code was narrowed from hundreds of people to merely three and that brought a relief that Steve hadn't realized he needed at that moment. While hyper-vigilant of the changes in Alice's general demeanor, he couldn't help but admit that despite her recent dodginess, she was still the person he trusted the most. His eyes turned to meet her once more and noticed that she had pulled up the image of Bucky's prosthetic, her eyes narrowed as she attempted to figure out how it worked.

Alice glanced at him for a brief moment, noticing his faraway expression, and sighing, "If you're curious, I'm trying to figure out how connected the prosthetic is to him…what they would've had to take away in order to secure the mount for the prosthetic and how it works."

"Is there a reason?"

"More for my morbid curiosity…Zola's notes are pretty vague in some parts, but the one thing he seemed particularly proud of was this mechanism."

The two were silent for a moment, digesting the tumultuous feelings that the two shared in regards to what had happened to Bucky and the kind of man he must still be if it took so much extra work for Zola to twist him into their Winter Soldier. After a moment Steve glanced back at the petite woman and frowned softly, "Tell me."

Her eyes snapped to him, her brows furrowed in uncertainty, "Are you sure?"

"He was the only person who ever saw me for me…I owe it to him to be sensitive to what he went through otherwise what kind of friend am I?"

"You're a good one, Steve…I don't think you know how to be anything else," Alice commented softly before snorting. "Sure, you can be a pain in the ass, but you're still a good friend. We all have our days where we aren't particularly fun to be around…that's normal, it's human. To pretend like those faults don't exist would be like pretending that you don't exist outside of the moniker of Captain America."

"Thank you, Al." Steve murmured after a pregnant paused before a small smile quirked at the corner of his lips, "You're a good friend too. I get that it's an automatic defense to hide or keep secrets, but just know that no matter what I'm always gonna be here if you need me. We're gonna find him and we're gonna make this work…no matter what that takes."

Alice eyed him for a moment before nodding, "I surely hope you mean that Steve."

"I do."

After a moment of the two staring at one another, the mutant sighed softly before grabbing her stylus and highlighting different parts of the prosthetic. "Based on what I remember seeing while I was being held in D.C, his prosthetic replaced his shoulder, part of his collarbone and circled down to cut out part of the pectoral muscle here," she gestured to the diagram that showcased the anatomy of a human body, using her stylus to draw on the blown up image. "Obviously, there's no way to know how far the prosthetic goes under the skin or what else was removed and replaced with metal, but I can only assume that the mount within the shoulder secures the nerve endings to where the arm itself mounts into and connects to those nerves."

"How could you tell?"

"When I was in the bank and they were working on his arm from your fight with him, he was on a drip. Whether that IV was pumping a sedative or painkiller of some kind I wouldn't be able to tell you. I was, unfortunately, too far away and busy trying not to die…big fat failure that was, but I digress." The wince was not missed by her eye and she continued her explanation in an effort to ignore the expression, "Anyway, Zola goes on and on about how he was presented limbless on the left side with torn tissue, muscle and fully severed bone…meaning he probably hit the side of the mountain before coming to a full stop."

"Jesus…"

"Yeah." She cleared her throat of the tightness that had begun to settle there, "He rambles on in his notes about the serum given to him in '43 and how he was the _perfect specimen_. It's infuriating, but I _need_ to know what this all entails this way I can be better prepared for what we're dealing with."

Steve was silent for a few moments as he considered what she had said before glancing up at her. "How far have you gotten in this file?"

"Truthfully?" Steve bobbed his head in a nod and she sighed once again, her shoulders slumping, "I haven't gotten past the early parts of the file. I don't want to know what they made him do…who they made him kill…all I care about is what happened to him, what he went through. I want him to feel comfortable talking to me about it if that's what he wants, but otherwise I don't care about what they made him do for seventy years…what I need to worry about is how to help him move forward."

There was a tension that had descended upon the lab that Alice had not been prepared for.

She had suspicions that Steve knew that she was working on something more than what she said, which she didn't particularly care about, but she worried that if he were to find out the particulars that he would insist on helping or worse would try and stop her. Alice was not blind that what she was doing by secretly taking out HYDRA bases and sorting through their data to back up until she needed it was not necessarily the morally right thing to do. She knew what she was doing was questionable at best and neither she or Wade had taken prisoners. She had killed to ensure that Bucky would not suffer at their hands ever again, that he could live however he pleased in peace knowing that no one could use him ever again. She had killed to ensure that she would be able to continue through the mundane without worry of ever being used to blaze someone else's trail ever again. The words that Pierce had spoken to her in that bank continued to haunt her, twisting her already traumatic nightmares based in reality into something even more horrific and now that she knew that innocent people were suffering because of the experiments run on her no less than thirty years ago she knew they needed to be abolished...by any means necessary.

HYDRA was a tumor on her life and she was dedicated to cutting them out no matter how painful that may be in the long run.

"I'm surprised you didn't read further…"

"I didn't because at the end of the day I don't care about anything but his wellbeing. I already have an idea of the horrors that he incurred in their name…I don't need it spelled out for me."

The look she shot him was lofty, meaningful and piercing and leaving Steve feel as if he was being judged by the woman. "Well…I'm gonna head up. Don't spend too much time in here…the party starts in a while."

"Right…I'll see you then."

Steve nodded stiffly before turning on his heel and walking from the lab, ignoring the feeling of Alice's eyes on his back.

**-0-**

Alice sighed deeply as she stepped out of the shower, tugging a robe around her body as she did and no sooner had she tied the garment closed was she suddenly reaching into her vanity drawer for a knife as the door was thrown open suddenly.

Jodi stopped for a moment, noticing the extremely defensive stance that the mutant had and raising her hands in surrender and chuckling sheepishly, "Sorry, mate!"

"Jo…I could've killed you!"

"Yeah, but you didn't," She grinned before kicking the door closed behind her. "I figured we'd get ready together…make this a whole thing."

Alice stared at her for a moment before pinching her nose, "You're here to make sure I actually show up."

"Righto, now, do you already have a dress!?"

"It's in the closet…"

Jodi grinned, watching as Alice dropped the knife onto the counter and turning to the mirror to begin working on the thick mane of waves and curls that formed from her scalp. She frowned suddenly, watching as the mutant grabbed various unmarked bottles, "What're those?"

Alice glanced at her from where she was working an oil through her hair, "I'm a sucker for homemade products…shampoos, conditioners, all of it. I've made them myself for the last…150 years or so?"

"Can I smell?"

The mutant nodded her consent as Jodi grabbed one of her perfumes and she smirked, " _Except_ that one…that's a perfume from the 1800s, though it's not used as such very often of recent."

"What's it called?" Jodi asked as she uncapped the perfume anyway and gave it a sniff, a flowery and spiced smell hitting her senses pleasantly. "It's different, I like it."

Alice giggled as she scrunched her hair into its natural waves and defining them, "It's called _Florida Water_."

"Wait like the state?" Jodi recoiled almost immediately and earning another laugh from the brunette.

"Yes and no…depends on how you look at it. I remember advertisements for when this product first came out in 1808. The name is supposed to represent the Fountain of Youth since it was rumored to be found in Florida, hence the more exotic smell."

"You bought it as a joke didn't you?" Jodi deadpanned earning a feline-like smirk in reply that she took as a resounding yes. Sighing the woman replaced it on the vanity, eyeing the mutant as she slid her another bottle. "You made this one?"

"Yeah, it's made mostly of jojoba oil – I used to use almond or walnut oil, but I just like jojoba best – vanilla essential oil and clove oil. Depending how I want it to apply, I'll either put it in a spray bottle or a rollerball container. But I've made a few different versions throughout the years…be it gifts or my own style change, but the clove and vanilla is my favorite."

"Sweet and spicy," The former agent smirked, "not unlike yourself."

"Now you watch yourself Jodi Moore, I happen to know of a woman who would not be particularly happy that you're flirting with me," Alice grinned and showing the woman that she was kidding as she wrapped her hair into a t-shirt to mop up the excess water in her hair. Jodi snorted loudly on a laugh before following the mutant out of her bathroom and into the bedroom where she had deposited her makeup bag and outfit for the evening and watching as Alice stepped into her closet to retrieve her undergarments and dress. "What time is this nonsense supposed to commence?"

"The party you mean?" Alice poked her head out from the side of the closet with a deadpanned look on her face and earning a snort from the blonde, "I'll take that as a yes. It's supposed to start in an hour, which is why I came to find you. Sam and Steve already went upstairs and I think Nat corralled Monica and Helen into a room."

"No Maria?"

"She's with Nat managing Sam's sister."

"I see you and I are in the same boat," Alice's voice drawled dryly from inside the closet.

"It's not that I don't like her, she's actually kinda cool once you get past the whole _holy fuck you're an Avenger_ patter. She's apparently a huge fashion and travel blogger in Europe and so it's rare to find her in the states. It's no wonder Sam jumped on catching her since she was in New York for Fashion Week or whatever."

"Makes sense," The mutant grunted from the closet and after a moment she appeared in her robe once again and her dress on the hanger. Jodi smirked when she noticed the bodycon cut of the velvety fabric. The dress itself had a single long sleeve on the right side, which Jodi assumed was to hide the deep scaring she had noticed during her training with the mutant and recalled that the woman was extremely dodgy about the scars that littered that side; the fabric a deep midnight blue fabric that nearly looked black depending on the light and appeared to potentially fall just beyond the knees. She watched as the mutant pulled out a mix of silver and gold jewelry before tapping her chin in regards to what earrings she wanted to wear with the dress.

"You know," Jodi began as she changed into her own attire for the evening which consisted of white high waist, fitted trousers with a matching white blazer to put over her strapless green top, "I honestly didn't think you'd go with a dress considering how much you like pants."

"I thought about it," Alice called back from the bathroom over the sound of her blow-dryer as she defused her hair. "But decided to go a little more classic tonight. I don't get dressed up often and I don't mind dresses…I've worn a great many throughout the years, but I'll always be a sucker for a good trouser."

Jodi snickered as she fit her top on, tucking it into the high waist of her pants and examining herself in the mirror, "You know…I can see why you preach about the trouser so much…there's just something sexy and chic about a pant that's not meant to be worn regularly."

"That's because you're too busy cutting off your circulation with those damn leggings."

"They're comfortable!"

Alice shook her head as she continued working on her hair. She had considered straightening her longer locks for that evening, but decided to do a traditional style with the cut of the dress. She normally parted her hair in the middle so that her bangs curtained outwards to frame her face, but for the dress she had picked she would need to side part her hair and Alice didn't have her hair cut to make that kind of style work. She hated parties for the simple reason that there was so much expectation on looking appropriate – other than the crowds – and that was something of her own making since she grew up being taught to present herself a certain way. After her hair was dried she began twisting the long locks into a messy chignon at the back of her neck, making it look effortless and as if she didn't try as hard as she probably could have before taking her straightener and beginning to form her bangs into a way that curtained her brow and framed her face without covering her features as she had already begun working on her makeup, but had stopped to do her hair.

Just as she finished, Jodi stepped into the bathroom with her makeup bag and a hopeful look on her face, "Would you do my hair too?"

Alice offered the woman a small smile before nodding, "Of course…I'm thinking pin-curls."

"I'm fine with whatever, I just want to at least look like I tried."

She smirked in reply, "You're a lot more fashionable than you give yourself credit for, you know."

"I do, but I just throw my hair in a topknot and call it a day…that doesn't exactly scream effort."

Alice shook her head before beginning to work on curling the woman's long locks, rolling curlers into the curl to allow it to cool and set as the blonde worked on her makeup. After completing the set, Alice quickly set about her own makeup merely doing a winged liner, mascara and adding lipstick to her lips. Jodi glanced in the mirror as she applied her mascara and gasped dramatically.

"What shade is that!?"

The brunette glanced down at the lipstick in her hand, turning it over to look at the label, " _Druidess_ by Notoriously Morbid? I forget who gave me this shade, but it may have been Natasha since she forced me out a few weeks ago to go shopping with her." She shrugged, "I actually have a few shades from them if you want to borrow one."

"Oh please can I?" When Alice nodded the woman cried out in joy. "I'll be honest, I'm normally not a _doll yourself up_ kinda girl, but I think this has been the most fun I've ever had getting ready for something like this."

The mutant shook her head with a laugh before reaching into her makeup bag and pulling a lipstick out for the blonde to use, "It's a mauve, rose pink with shimmer…it'll look subtle without clashing with your outfit."

Jodi took the lipstick, using a clean brush from her kit to transfer the product before applying it to her lips, "This is gorgeous! What shade!?"

" _Vitriolic_." The former agent smiled widely before turning back to adding more touches to her makeup as Alice began undoing the curlers and brushing the curls into the form that she had envisioned, tugging the long strands over Jodi's shoulder and using hairspray to slick the one side down before adding a long clip that had white and gold roses along the center. She then sprayed the curls in place and stepped back before nodding to herself. "There, you look like a dream."

"Alice, I didn't think my hair could _do_ this."

The mutant smirked, placing her chin on the woman's shoulder, "Luckily for you, I lived during the era when this was extremely popular. Remind me to teach you sometime."

"I will remember that!"

"I'm gonna go put my dress on and then we can go…I guess."

"It's gonna be great, Alice!"

She rolled her eyes in reply before stepping into her room, loosening her robe and tugging the dress over herself - being careful to not ruin any of the other work she had put into her look for that night and adjusting it accordingly. Just as she finished fixing the skirt, Jodi came into view and practically pranced over to where she had left her blazer and a pair of gold cut-out heels and fixing a gold choker to her neck along with two long dangled earrings that elongated her swan-like neck.

Alice kept Bucky's necklace on her neck and paired it with the necklace Thor had given her before adding a few mismatched bracelets to her wrists and adding a simple pair of diamond studs to her ears. Alice decided that with the other jewelry it would be too much to add a dangled earring and then grabbed pair of ankle-strapped heels from her closet and sighing as she attached them to her feet and looking up at Jodi.

"Let's just get this over with, please."

"You look gorgeous, Al!"

The mutant blushed slightly in embarrassment before nodding slowly, "You do too, Jo. Now if you don't mind, I'm grabbing something to drink before we head up."

"Stop prolonging the inevitable, besides, I want to waste Stark's money! We'll get drinks upstairs, c'mon!"

Alice was forced into stumbling after the former agent as she was pulled from her room and to the elevator just beyond her apartment. The ride up to the penthouse was uncomfortable for the mutant as she fidgeted with the charm on Bucky's necklace, rubbing the coin in between her fingers without shame as she mentally prepared herself for the evening ahead. Alice knew that this was to celebrate a victory for the team and while Steve had made it out to be PR, she knew that wasn't the case. She had spoken to Bruce about it and he had laughed and told her that it was just a way to force her into coming and that she should come regardless of the reason before steering her out of the lab that he and Tony had been working in. Despite this, Alice felt a sense of dread settle in her gut.

"Hey it'll all be okay," Jodi smiled from the opposite side of the elevator to give the mutant some room as she was aware of her claustrophobia. "I checked the guest list earlier and there's not too many people coming...Just some veterans and a few Stark Employees so it won't be super crowded, beside you have us there. Let's just try and have some fun tonight yeah?"

"Sure," The mutant replied through clenched teeth as she forced her lips into a smile, though it appeared as more of a grimace and the agent sighed.

"Just…deep breaths okay?"

"Sure…everything will be fine."

"That's the spirit!" Jodi smiled as the elevator came to a stop, "now, first stop is the bar. I'll get ya a drink."

The two women stepped off of the elevator to see that the party was already in full swing.

Alice, out of habit, immediately picked out where she planned to perch as the loft area had less people congregated. She was able to see many of their colleagues including the team socializing with other party goers as well as each other including the pleasant addition of Rhodey, who had arrived earlier that afternoon. Nat was near the bar in a flattering monochromatic dress and matching heels, her curls styled classically and tucked behind a single ear and joining her was Maria in a beautiful carmine red sheath dress with gold accessories that complemented her dark hair and pale skin wonderfully, donning a pair of black heels. The two women were chatting amicably and were soon joined by Monica donned in a baby pink pantsuit that fit her snugly and showing off her curvaceous form and a pair of nude heels to match, her hair pulled into a beautiful bun at the top of her head. The three women laughed at something before Alice's eyes continued surveying the room.

Helen Cho was speaking with Thor with a flute of champagne in her glass, the Asgardian nursing a pint of some kind; Rhodey was socializing with a group of veterans off to the side with Steve and Sam near a billiards table; Bruce was seated off to the side and looked as if he was trying to stay out of view of as many people as he could, but was joined by a young couple and were chatting with relative ease. Clint was walking down a flight of stairs from the observation deck with Tony and both were laughing about something or another and despite the many strange faces, Alice felt herself starting to relax seeing that everyone else around seemed to be genuinely enjoying their time. Without having time to look around more, she was being dragged by the arm to where Natasha, Maria and Monica were at the bar.

"Bartender, can we get this tall glass of water a drink?"

Alice nearly face palmed at the absurd statement.

Natasha's lips quirked humorously before she glanced at the mutant, "What can I get you?"

"Something with a good punch right now," She groaned in reply. "Just so long as I never have to hear _that_ again!"

Jodi pouted as Maria and Monica laughed, the former threading her arm through Jodi's and smiling up at her, "Aw, I'm happy you managed to get Al out of her self-imposed imprisonment!"

"I know," The former agent blushed, "I caught her at a good time since she was actually getting ready."

"You don't like parties, Alice?"

The mutant looked up at Monica and shrugged helplessly, "I don't do well in crowds in general…they make me twitchy."

"I know exactly what you mean," The woman nodded, "I'm actually a bit ochlophobic…it's rare that I do Fashion Week anymore because the crowds get so bad, but…baby steps right?"

She sighed softly to herself before Nat chimed in, "Tony made sure to leave some areas open for you, so you should be able to sneak away if you start getting claustrophobic."

"Thanks Nat." Her shoulders slumped in relief before glancing around, "So is there anyone I should keep my eye on this evening?"

Monica smirked around the lip of her drink, "Beside Captain America himself? Probably not…though I think you'd look cute with my brother, but I'm a bit biased."

"Alice is actually in a relationship," Jodi smiled kindly at the woman.

Like a shark to blood in the water, Monica's eyes lit up before she hastily put her drink down and rested her chin on her interlocked fingers, "That's so exciting! Tell me a bit about him…or her! I don't judge!"

Laughing awkwardly the mutant glanced out of the corner of her eye at the former spy to see that she was pouring some concoction of a drink into a glass for her and before she could answer, the glass hit the corner of her fingers. Alice was not shy to take a hefty swig of what she was quickly finding out was a Sazerac and she nearly choked as the standard New Orlesian cocktail settled in her esophagus, "Holy _fuck_ Nat!"

"You wanted something with a good punch." Natasha shrugged without a hint of remorse. Alice coughed a few more times before sighing, resigning herself to answering the woman.

"He was a soldier, but...um...he's away on business so he couldn't make it for this evening."

Monica's look became almost predatory, "That's it? What does he look like? Is he handsome? Where'd you two meet!?"

"Um…" Alice shot a helpless look at the three other women only to receive shrugs and an apologetic smile from Jodi. The mutant swore revenge. "He's tall…well everyone's taller than me, so I guess that doesn't count; blue eyes, dark hair…so yes, he's handsome." Alice took a careful sip of her cocktail as she gathered her thoughts, "Before I was a hacker for the Avengers I spent a lot of time as a nurse, so he and I met while enlisted."

"Ughhh! That's so sweet!" Monica sighed dreamily before she turned sharp eyes to Maria and Jodi, noting the interlocked elbows with almost laser vision, "And what's the situation with _you two_?"

"If you'll excuse me ladies, I think I see Thor flagging me down!" Alice quickly stated before making her way away from the bar as quickly as she could now that the heat was off of her and barely noticing as Monica danced after the two former S.H.I.E.L.D agents as they tried to briefly escape. As stated she decided to head over to speak to the Asgardian who was currently engaged in conversation with Tony and Rhodey.

"Well, you know, the suit can take the weight, right? So I take the tank, fly it right up to the General's palace, drop it at his feet, I'm like, "Boom! You looking for this?" Rhodey was saying with motions and enthusiasm as the two Avengers stared back at him blankly, " _Boom! Are you looking…_ Why do I even talk to you guys? Everywhere else that story kills."

Thor blinked, "That's the whole story?"

"Yeah," The Colonel sighed helplessly, "it's a War Machine story."

"Well, It's very good then! It's impressive."

"Quality save," He remarked sarcastically, and nodding to Alice as she sided next to them, Maria joining quickly afterwards with a flush to her cheeks having clearly escaped from Monica somehow. "So, no Pepper? She's not coming?"

Tony shrugged with a shake of his head, "No."

"Hey what about Jane?" Maria intoned quickly and nearly hiding behind Alice as she did, "Where are the ladies, gentlemen?"

"Well," the billionaire shrugged, "Miss Potts has a company to run."

Thor glanced at the man and nodded enthusiastically, "Yes, I'm not even sure what country Jane's in. Her work on the convergence has made her the world's _foremost_ astronomer."

"And the company that _Pepper_ runs is the largest tech conglomerate on earth." Alice, Maria and Rhodey shared a look with one another as Tony continued, "It's pretty exciting."

"There's even talk of Jane getting a…um, uh…Nobel prize!"

"Yeah they…they must be busy because they'd hate missing you guys get together," She snorted before coughing mockingly, " _Testosterone_! Oh, excuse me!"

"Want a lozenge?" Rhodey smirked as he politely held his arm out for Maria to take as she placed her hand on her chest to sell her mocked act, "Let's go."

As the two walked off, Alice looked back at Tony and Thor in time to hear the Asgardian lean into the billionaire and smugly state, "But Jane's better."

"Yeah okay, Point Break," Tony snorted before glancing at the mutant. "How're you holding up, Wonderland?"

"I mean I could either be here or my room so…" She mockingly weighed her hands against the other before shrugging. "It doesn't matter…I'm here so may as well try and enjoy it for a bit."

"That's the spirit!"

She offered him an awkward smile, "Well, I'm glad you seem to think so."

"Come, Alice, this is a celebration! You should be very happy!" Thor smiled widely before tossing an arm over her shoulder, "And you look fantastic. You know Jane has a remarkable sense of style as well. You two must meet, I'm certain you'll get along well."

"I'd love to Thor," She smiled slightly as she allowed him to lead her away and towards where a group of World War II veterans were laughing and drinking merrily with both Sam and Steve. "Maybe we can set something up, should our schedules allow it."

He grinned down at her and raised his pint, clinking it against her glass in a cheers, "I should hope so. She also has a friend, Darcy: easily the most fearsome woman I've ever met. You know she tased me the first time we met."

"I don't think you've _ever_ mentioned that."

"She was also the one to introduce me to Pop Tarts," He whispered conspiratorially. "She is quite fun. I think you'd like her as well."

"I'd love to meet them," Alice replied with an easy smile and thankful for Thor's timely intervention as the large man deterred many of the party goers from speaking with her. It was almost as if he sensed this about her and she frowned up at him suddenly, "Hey, Thor…I just had a thought and I'm curious if you knew – other than me saying it – that I was uncomfortable."

"Well of course," He replied easily, taking a sip of his drink and looking down at her. "You've made it clear enough that parties are not of your liking and that you dislike small spaces…other than that you are walking stiffer than normal and we all know you can walk normally in heeled shoes."

Alice blushed brightly in embarrassment and offering the man a forced smile especially as he referenced a mission they had done nearly four months prior, "Touché."

"It isn't a bad thing, in fact, you quite remind me of Loki when we were younger."

"Because _that's_ what every girl wants to hear, Thor."

"I'm quite serious," the Asgardian insisted with a serious furrow to his brow. "Growing up, Loki was not looked at as a man of many triumphs despite going on several raiding parties with myself, Lady Sif and The Warriors Three. When we were still learning, I took many of the same classes he did in an effort to be closer to him."

Alice smiled softly, "I'm assuming that's where the jocular wit comes from?"

"Well," Thor frowned thoughtfully, "when I was first sent here by my father several years ago now –"

The mutant deadpanned, "It was three years ago."

" _Several_ years ago," He insisted, "it had taken me a few days to learn your more modern colloquialisms. Since spending time with Jane, Darcy and you all, I think I've become quite fluent in what you all define as _sarcasm_."

"You're a real hoot, Thor."

"See, I can tell _that_ was sarcasm," The Asgardian chuckled. "Now, as I was saying, Loki was not always as he was when you were…introduced to him. He was smart, much smarter than myself and much more clever." He smiled wistfully, "While I was always my father's favorite, Loki was my mother's. She spent countless hours teaching him sorcery and what Jane has defined a few times as _quantum field energy_. Which we had always used to power what we called the _Soul Forge_."

Alice pondered the statement, "You've mentioned it before...isn't just molecular energy?"

Thor, who had been about to continue, paused before glancing down at the woman in surprise. "Yes."

"Well, that's just what quantum energy is," Alice explained before shrugging. "I can assume that the Soul Forge merely transfers these energies from one place to another, which would actually make it more of a generator rather than anything else."

"Yes, you two would get along _very_ well." Thor muttered dryly before shaking his head. "Loki took to science…magic…whatever you'd like to call it, but he used it to his advantage since he was not built like the rest of us…turns out he was adopted."

Alice nodded, "That…actually makes a weird amount of sense."

"Yes, I thought it might." He grinned before his face softened. "Thank you…for letting me speak of him. You do not seem to judge as harshly as everyone else."

She merely shrugged in reply, "Well, I'm always willing to listen Thor…should you ever need a friendly ear or at least a nonjudgmental one."

"Wonderful, come let us join Cap and these jolly men – hello!"

Alice hung back as she watched the two Avengers engage the veterans in light banter, nearly missing when Sam sided up alongside of her. "And how is the party-hater enjoying the party?"

"You do realize I know where you sleep Sam?"

The former Pararescuer threw his head back and laughed, "There's that sense of humor I've been missing! That drink loosen you up?"

"Unfortunately," The mutant chuckled. "Nat decided she wanted me to start out with something that would inevitably knock my shoes right off...not her fault, I _did_ ask for it."

"What'dya get?"

"If I remember correctly," Alice mocked a thinking face, "I believe it's known by the locals as a Sazerac."

"Jesus, she started you off strong."

"Yeah…not that I blame her…your sister was asking about my _love life_."

Sam, who had been in the middle of taking a sip of his beer, nearly snorted the liquid through his nose and instantaneously choking as he sputtered on a laugh.

"It wasn't _that_ funny," Alice grumbled as she handed him a napkin to help him clean himself off. "I literally don't know how to avoid her…has she always been so…?"

"Intrusive?" Sam laughed after he managed to stop his coughing fit. "Yeah, she's my kid sister so she had to be like that in order to get where she is. We lost our parents early, so when I went into the military, Mo stayed with our family down in New Orleans."

"Oh, Sam, I'm sorry…"

"Nah you're alright, Al. No need to apologize." Sam assuaged her guilt easily enough with a smile that assured her he hadn't taken offense. "Not many people know about it and I don't talk about it often, but yeah. When I got back from Afghanistan she was the one to dig me out of the hole I made for myself and she learned to be persistent to make sure I didn't fall off any wagons."

Alice considered the man's words before nodding slowly, "Makes sense…but apparently she thinks we'd be a cute couple."

"Well," Sam snickered as he straightened out his jacket with theatrical cockiness that sent the mutant into a fit of giggles, "I _am_ good looking."

"I think it's because I'm more famous than you," She snorted on her laughter before feigning sympathy when he wilted dramatically and she patted his shoulder. "There, there…no need to cry such manly tears…I'll clean them up for you with my gold-stitched hanky."

"Ew you sound like Tony, stop it."

The two continued joking with one another and ignoring the looks they received from both Steve and Thor who had barely caught the tail end of the conversation. The patriot glanced over at the mutant, noting her appearance and smiling. Alice had always known how to clean up and her appearance at this party was a drastic change from the oversized overalls, cropped hoodie and moccasin slippers she had been wearing earlier that day in her lab. He was surprised when she nodded at something Sam said before fitting herself in between himself and Thor (who was chatting animatedly with Daniel, a veteran who had been speaking about the storming of Normandy).

"Hey."

"Hey," Alice smiled up at him before glancing at the men and quirking a brow, "anyone I'd know?"

"Maybe one or two that have crossed paths with you before," Steve smiled. It was clear the two of them were going to avoid the conversation in the mutant's lab earlier that day and the awkwardness it had left to linger. Instead it appeared as if Alice was trying to take the party as what it was and enjoy herself. "They recognized me easily enough, and I'm sure they'd recognize you."

"Maybe," She shrugged with a smile.

Unlike Steve and Thor, alcohol did affect her as it would any normal person; her mutation doing nothing against inebriation, but it did prevent her from getting alcohol poisoning which she had found out the hard way. The mutant was pleasantly tipsy and it was thanks to the strong cocktail in her hands which had a bit more alcohol than a bourbon or a scotch or whiskey would normally have alone thanks to the combination of the cognac, whiskey and absinthe. It also didn't help that Natasha had had a heavy hand with her drink in particular.

"You look nice," Steve commented and watching as a tipsy smile curled at the corners of her lips. "The last time I saw you this dressed up was that one weekend in December of –"

"1944," Alice smiled as she clearly remembered the same instance that he was speaking of. "It was the only weekend that my leave coincided with the Commandos and we were in…I want to say England?"

"Yeah it was England, specifically we were in London."

"I _remember_..." She giggled suddenly, "I remember Dum Dum challenging you to a drinking contest because he didn't believe you couldn't get drunk."

"And Bucky knew and convinced him to do it anyway."

"That was a fun night," Alice hummed earning a snort from the patriot.

"It _was_ until we had to carry Dum Dum back to base!"

The mutant snorted another laugh and nodded, "That's right…Gosh, I remember I had to come up with a miracle cure for him the next morning because you guys had to report to Colonel Phillips."

Steve threw his head back and laughed, "What'd you give him again?"

"Ginger root."

The two laughed at the memory before they were interrupted by the shouts of protests from the veterans at something Thor had said to them; the Asgardian laughing merrily, completely unbothered.

"I gotta have some of that!" One of the veterans cried as Thor pulled out a small flask from his coat and pouring some in his pint and doing the same to Steve's before offering some to Alice who shook her head.

"I'd like to wake up tomorrow, Thor, but thank you."

The Asgardian shrugged before answering the elderly man with a humored smile, "Oh, no, no, no. See this, _this_ was aged for a thousand years, in the barrels from the wreck of Brunhilde's fleet. It's not meant for mortal men."

"Neither was Omaha Beach, blondie," Daniel snapped with a feisty look in his eye, "Stop tryin' to scare us. Come on."

Thor shrugged before pouring some of the alcohol from his flask into each of the gathered gentlemen's drinks offering a cheers and taking a long sip. Alice threw a humored look at Steve when he threw her a startled look, seeming to actually be able to feel the alcohol in the drink and shooting another look at the beer in his hand.

"Warn a guy, will you?"

"I did," Thor smiled, clinking glasses with the patriot once more and downing the remainder of his pint. "Shall we get another?"

"Sure…"

"I'll leave you boys to it." Alice smiled and waving as they got up, "I'm gonna head down to Rhodey before he tells that War Machine story again."

The night continued on with Alice making her rounds and disappearing for nondescript amounts of time in order for her to relax long enough to actually enjoy the party. The guests all began leaving slowly and leaving the team behind, Sam informing herself and Steve that he was going to take Monica to a hotel and spend the rest of the evening with her before she had to catch her flight the next morning. The woman had collected Alice in a tight hug before promising to see her when she was back in the states and the mutant found herself agreeing, realizing that the woman was not as bad as she had initially thought.

Currently the group found themselves on the large horseshoe shaped couch in varying degrees and debating Thor's hammer. Alice found herself sitting on Steve's right and next to Rhodey, Maria and Jodi, with a space left open for Tony between Rhodey and Jodi. Maria had stolen Steve's jacket at some point in the evening after catching a chill and sat on the floor next to Clint. Thor sat on Steve's left and next to him was a dozing Helen Cho who had curled herself onto one of the arm chairs beside Natasha who was leaned closer to Bruce and having their own conversation. Clint sat uncaring of the food in front of him, twirling a drumstick in between his fingers, pleasantly buzzed, and was arguing the legitimacy of the rules regarding the Asgardian's weapon of choice. Tony had just gotten back with a series of Chinese food containers in hopes to have everyone sober up and the mutant had happily taken the fried wontons and a Arizona green tea (that Tony knew she was inclined to enjoying over soda) and seating himself next to Rhodey once more.

"But it's a trick!" Clint cried in exasperation as the group continued laughing and chatting amicably. Thor clinked his beer bottle against the neck of Steve's once more before laughing, the patriot allowing the mutant to lean into him as he noticed her shiver. Thor merely shook his head.

"Oh, no. It's much more than that."

"Uh, _whosoever be he worthy shall haveth the power!_ Whatever man, it's a trick!"

The Asgardian merely smirked before gesturing to the hammer that had been sat delicately on the table between them, "Well please, be my guest."

A series of laughs echoed around the room as Clint weighed the seriousness of the challenge in the blonde behemoth's voice. Tony snickered, "Well, come on!"

"Really?"

"Yeah."

Rhodey shook his head, a smile pulling at his features, "Oh, this is gonna be beautiful."

"Now Clint, you've had a tough week, we won't hold it against you if you can't get it up."

As the group shared various forms of laugher, Clint shrugged before gripping the handle of the hammer, "You know I've seen this before, right?" Alice stuffed another wonton drenched in sweet chili sauce into her mouth, hiding a smile since she knew the man was referring to his time in the circus. As Clint strained to lift the hammer he grunted a laugh, "I still don't know how you do it!"

"Do you smell the silent judgement?" Tony smirked from his position on the couch and earning an exasperated look from the archer.

"Please, Stark, by all means."

Alice and Natasha shared a look before the former spy shook her head, "Oh, here we go."

"Okay." Maria snorted as she moved out of Tony's way so he could pass.

A series of other sounds echoed around the room as what had started off as innocent banter had now transformed into a contest to see who in the room would be worthy to wield Mjolnir.

"Never one to shrink from an honest challenge," Tony explained as if they were toddlers and he was teaching a lesson. "It's physics."

"Get after it," Clint snorted.

Alice rolled her eyes after chewing her way through another wonton, "Ten bucks says he won't be able to lift it."

"You're on!" Jodi giggled as she took another sip of her water. Maria rolled her eyes.

"Physics!" Bruce snorted as he looked over at Natasha with an incredulous smile. Tony continued undeterred.

"Right, so, if I lift it, I…I then rule Asgard?"

"Yes, of course."

Alice snorted at the behemoth's dry and sarcastic comment.

"I _will_ be re-instituting _Prima Nocta._ " Alice groaned out an exaggerated _ew_ , earning a snorted laugh from Steve and guffaw from Clint. As he strained to lift the hammer he grunted before an idea lit his brown eyes, "I'll be right back." Not two minutes later he returned with the hand of one of his suits, attaching it and attempting to lift once more. When he failed a second time, he managed to somehow convince Rhodey to join him (Alice hadn't been paying attention as she was collecting her ten dollars from Jodi and stuffing another drenched wonton in her mouth with a feline grin), the two men straining despite their suits gloves giving them added strength.

"Are you even pulling?" Rhodey groaned as he pulled and earning a snort from Tony.

"Are you on my team?"

"Just represent! Pull!"

"Alright let's go."

With the two failing, Bruce was then encouraged to try and he attempted to lift the hammer with a growling yell as if attempting to channel the Hulk and laughing awkwardly when he caught Natasha staring at him with a grin on her lips. Alice offered the man a shrugged apology as she happily continued munching on her food.

"Cap?"

The mutant glanced at Steve in question before the man shrugged and stood up, stepping over Thor and to where the hammer rested. With a great heave he attempted to lift the hammer though a flicker of doubt crossed his features for a moment and he gave up with his hands up as a sign of surrender, the horrified look that had appeared on Thor's face quickly turning into what sounded like relieved laughter to Alice.

"Nope, nothing!"

After a few moments of silence the group stared between the mutant and Natasha.

"And?"

"Widow? Hellcat?"

"Oh, no, no. That's not a question I need answered," Natasha laughed as she leaned back and taking a sip of her beer. Alice merely shook her head.

"Nope, wontons are more important than a testosterone contest. I happily abstain."

Tony snorted, "All the deference to the man who wouldn't be king, but it's rigged."

"You bet your ass!"

Maria, mid swallow, immediately looked at the patriot, "Steve, he said a bad language word!"

"Did you tell _everyone_ about that?"

Alice smirked, "No that was me."

"The handle's imprinted, right?" Tony continued despite the look tossed at the mutant, "Like a security code. _Whoever is carrying Thor's fingerprints_ , I think, is the literal translation?"

"Yes, well that's, uh, that's a very, _very_ interesting theory. I have a simpler one," Thor nodded as he stood up, gripping the handle of his hammer and flipping it in his grasp, "You're all not worthy."

The group protested loudly before loud feedback began to sound throughout the penthouse and forcing everyone to cover their ears. Tony was quick to remove his portable Stark Pad and try and figure out what the issue was. Alice, however, was the first to notice the bot dragging itself and loose parts into the room and leaving a trail of oil in it's wake.

"Um…guys?"

" _Worthy…No…How could you be worthy? You're all killers._ "

All joking had gone from the room in an instant, the team standing immediately and preparing for the worst. Steve glared at the bot, his eyes briefly straying to Tony, "Stark…"

"JARVIS."

" _I'm sorry, I was asleep. Or…I was a dream?_ "

"Reboot, Legionnaire OS, we got a buggy suit."

" _There was a terrible noise_ ," The bot rumbled with a tinny sound to it's voice that echoed and reverberated through it's speakers, " _…and I was tangled in…in…strings. I had to kill the other guy. He was a good guy._ "

"You killed someone?"

Alice briefly watched as Maria grabbed a handgun from beneath the table, turning so the gun was hidden and sliding out of her heels. The mutant had already been barefoot, but she slid her hand down her thigh to where she had holstered a knife while getting dressed for that evening and noticing Jodi fingering the inside of her jacket.

" _Wouldn't have been my first call. But, down in the real world we're faced with ugly choices._ "

Thor growled lowly in his throat, "Who sent you?"

" _ **I see a suit of armor around the world**_." Tony's voice echoed from within the bot and all heads immediately turned to him to see that his features were twisted in confusion and a touch of horror at the mentioning of the bot before them killing someone.

"Ultron!"

Alice's head snapped to Banner to see him looking at Tony with a look of incredulity. The bot chuckled darkly in reply.

" _In the flesh. Or, no, not yet. Not this…chrysalis. But I'm ready. I'm on a mission._ "

Natasha's brows pinched over her eyes, "What mission?"

" _Peace in our time_."

Suddenly the Iron Legion bots broke through the walls with their sights on the team. The team scattered, beginning to take out what bots they could as they avoided the onslaught. Alice had flipped herself behind the couch and was using it as cover, lifting her skirt above her holster and unsheathing the knife there. Blasts echoed around the room as the bots began trying to destroy anyone in their path and Alice prepared herself to run from cover, noticing Clint off to the side who was motioning for her to come.

Alice shook her head for a brief moment before motioning for him to cup his hands so she could jump. After a moment he nodded and braced himself and with a deep breath, Alice ran from her cover, avoiding a blast from one of the bots that flew overhead and using Clint's hands to catapult her up and onto another bot that had been flying behind the first.

Wrapping her legs around its torso she spun the knife in her hand so she had a good grip and stabbed downwards into where its head was attached to its shoulders by an exoskeleton and a series of wires, the mutant being sure to cut into those wires. When it didn't seem to help she instead jabbed the knife into where the clavicle would be located and twisted, the bot falling from the sky and dropping her with it. Clint had stayed below to catch her and at the very least braced her fall before pulling them back behind cover.

"You think you can get up there?"

Alice glanced at where Clint was pointing and noticing Steve's shield before shaking her head, "No…but I can sure as shit cover you."

"Sounds good."

"Go."

The two broke with the mutant racing behind the archer. Jodi noticed the two approaching from the one side and called out to the mutant, "Al! Catch!"

Alice had a second to react to the gun being lobbed in her direction, catching it with ease that surprised her before beginning to shoot at the bots as they swooped towards the archer as he raced for the shield. After a few more moments in which the chaos was slowing down, Clint reached the shield calling out to the patriot as he hurled the shield towards Steve, who caught it deftly and used it to dismember the last Iron Legion bot.

" _Well, that was dramatic_ ," The main bot had spoken once more, turning away from them briefly as it took a few more steps, " _I'm sorry, I know you mean well. You just didn't think it through! You want to protect the world, but you don't want it to change. How is humanity saved if it's not allowed to…evolve?_ " It picked up the nearest dismembered legion bot, " _With these? These puppets? There's only one path to peace: The Avengers' extinction_!"

With a roar Thor threw his hammer into the remaining bot and sending it careening into the wall behind it. Alice stared in horror as the disjointed voice began to sing.

" _I had strings, but now I'm free…_ "

The voice petered out leaving the room of heroes staring at one another in a mix of shock, awe and horror.

"I hate parties."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: And here we are everyone! We are now moving into the AOU timeline of the story. Since this is basically just a weekend, I'll be moving relatively quickly through this timeline so anticipate some long ass chapters from here on out!
> 
> I'll go ahead and say that I did as much research as I could about the super soldier serum, but there wasn't anything super conclusive for me to compare the similarities and differences between Erskine's serum and Zola's so everything where Alice is breaking down that part is legitimately all made up because ~fan fiction~. I tried to keep everything as realistic as possible, but after watching TWS and Civil War extensively over the last few days (my Disney+ account looks hilarious because of this, BTW and I'm pretty sure my family is tired of hearing/seeing these movies, but I digress) and noticed a few differences between Steve and Bucky. We all know they both have a serum that gives them enhanced abilities, but the way they act is extremely different. Where Steve has this incredible moral barometer and sense of justice/right and wrong, Bucky is way more intense – hyper-focused, analytical and driven which we know comes from the core of the serum heightening traits that are already there. If Bucky was truly evil, I'm positive there would be other traits exhibited. So, I tried to focus on these points in order for Alice to be able to draw comfort that Bucky is still in there somewhere ;)
> 
> Also, tension happening between Steve and Alice…whew! I'm not gonna lie, I genuinely hate writing them at odds, but it honestly needs to happen as we lead up into Civil War's timeline considering Steve kinda throws away the entire idea of Captain America and simply exists as Steve Rogers so there's a little more moral ambiguity there. It'll get better I promise!
> 
> And then we have the party. Alice is me while at parties…also, I'm obsessed with fried wontons so in turn Alice ultimately turned down the worthiness challenge because she had food ;)
> 
> Now before I end the full analytics of this note, I want to point out something from the worthiness challenge about Steve specifically. We all know Steve is worthy of the hammer, however, I firmly belief that his knowledge of Bucky killing Howard and Maria Stark absolutely plagues him with guilt especially since he has become such good friends with Tony and it's clear that Tony doesn't know…see rampage in Civil War. I genuinely believe this is why Steve cannot lift Mjolnir during the AOU timeline because at this point he wasn't worthy because Mjolnir considers everything for someone to be worthy to wield it. Just my thoughts on the matter so I tossed that in!
> 
> With all of that said, thank you so, so much to everyone who has taken time out to read this story in any capacity. You all rock and I love you all deeply, lol!
> 
> As a final note, I'm going to take a quick moment to shout out my dear friend simmerandcry and her story "Show Me, Don't Tell Me!" Avery is a wonderful character and she's so worth investing in as an OC because she's incredible! Also, if you love Alice, Alice makes a cameo in her story over there so either way you should probably go check out the story ;)
> 
> Love you all lots and see you in the next chapter!
> 
> xoxo Eirlys
> 
> P.S. I may or may not update this upcoming weekend since my birthday is on Saturday, so we'll see what happens and how fast I can write out the next chapter ;3 Love you guys!


	25. Blood on My Hands

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before we begin, thank you to everyone who has taken time to bookmark, read or comment on this story so far! Just know you're all so greatly appreciated and I absolutely adore you so, so much :D

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****** **TRIGGER WARNING: THIS CHAPTER HAS THEMES OF SEXUAL ASSAULT, IMPLIED NON-CON, TORTURE AND MURDER AS WELL AS CONTENT THAT MAY BE CONSIDERED DISTURBING OR GRAPHIC TO CERTAIN AUDIENCES. PLEASE PROCEED WITH CAUTION** ******

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 _As the Sky May Fall_ _  
__Deadpool_ **/|\** _Age of Ultron_ _  
__25_

After the attack the group went about doing damage control.

Alice had quickly snatched a medical kit and began making sure those who needed help were taken care of. Maria – despite the glass in her feet – insisted that she was fine and she could take care of it; but Jodi sat with a deep slump to her shoulders, allowing Alice to stitch the large cut in the woman's hairline. She hadn't bothered to change after the events that had transpired until Natasha approached her with a pair of leggings, mock-turtleneck sweatshirt and a pair of sneakers while she was checking Rhodey's arm. The man offered her a nod of thanks before leaving her and the former spy and Alice took the offered clothing with a forced smile.

"Thanks, Nat."

"I'm sorry it's not what you'd normally jump at, but…it's looking like it's gonna be a long night."

Alice considered the former spy's resigned comment and she nodded slowly in reply. "We may need some coffee…or something at the very least."

"I'll see if we can convince Steve into taking care of that, I don't think he'll be much help with the technical side of all of this despite how good he's gotten. Besides, I think seeing what we're up against is paramount."

"No, I agree…but even with JARVIS's help it's gonna take a bit to figure out what the hell all that was," the mutant replied as she slid the leggings on beneath her dress before pulling the fabric over her head and quickly tugging the sweatshirt on, adjusting the outfit quickly as she pulled her shoes on, having long since removed her lipstick when they had been eating earlier. "Has Thor gotten back yet?"

"No," Natasha sighed as she shook out her hair. "I'm sure he'll be back soon though. Scepter's gone and now we've got a homicidal murder bot to contend with."

Alice frowned softly as she considered the statement, balling her dress up haphazardly and tossing it to the side as everyone began congregating in the main lab that was attached to the penthouse. The group wore varying looks of worry to frustration and Alice sighed softly as she took in the room.

The tension was hard to miss and most of it seemed aimed at Tony, which she found surprising for the simple reason that Bruce had assisted in the apparent manufacture of Ultron, yet he seemed to miss the ire of many people in the room. She found herself standing next to Clint, who had sobered up quickly with the kick of adrenaline that had been spurred by the fight no more than fifteen minutes prior. The archer reached a hand up, resting it on her shoulder and sighing softly.

"Not how I was picturing my night," He murmured with an unamused look shot at Tony's back once again. Alice's hand traced her jaw in an effort to relieve the tension that had settled there from her teeth being clenched together and nodded her agreement.

"I don't think any of us were expecting this," she whispered back, crossing her arms. "I was hoping that I'd maybe be able to sleep tonight, but it's looking like we're gonna be up for a while."

He ran a hand through his hair with a sharp nod, "Yeah…couldn't leave it alone, could he?"

"I'm willing to hear _their_ side," the mutant frowned, shrugging. "Remember, Bruce helped in some way…it doesn't absolve him of his involvement."

"Scientists man…you'd think they'd learn."

"I'll remind you gently that I'm also a scientist in a way," she commented with as a small and teasing grin ghosted her lips. "Although, I'm not in the market of creating murder bots."

"Touché."

After a moment Bruce sighed as he stepped back into the lab, rubbing a hand down his face, "All our work is gone…Ultron cleared out, used the internet as an escape hatch."

"Ultron," Steve shook his head with a longsuffering sigh. Alice frowned suddenly as she looked up at Bruce.

"If he used the internet as an escape hatch, couldn't we try and track him the exact same way?"

"If you want to try, be my guest." Bruce shook his head as he ran a hand through his hair, "Just don't hope for anything positive to come from it."

"He's been in everything," Natasha sighed as she stepped back into the room, her arms crossed over her chest, "Files, surveillance…probably knows more about us than we know about each other."

"He's in your files, he's in the internet," Rhodey seemed to growl as he held his still sore arm, the appendage thankfully not broken from when he had been blasted through the glass window that had led to the launch deck for the quinjet. "What if he decides to access something a little more exciting?"

Maria had paused in picking the glass out of her feet as she realized what the Colonel was implying, "Nuclear codes."

"Nuclear codes," He parroted the affirmative, rubbing his head with a deep sigh before he met each of their eyes. "Look, we need to make some calls…assuming we still can."

"Nukes? He said he wanted us dead."

"He didn't say _dead_ ," Steve corrected the former spy with a deep scowl tugging at his lips, "He said _extinct_."

Clint sighed, "He also said he killed somebody."

"But there wasn't anyone else in the building." Maria frowned before all looked to Tony who stepped forward with a broken expression on his features.

"Yes there was." With a flick of his Stark Pad a broken and destroyed 3D rendering of JARVIS's consciousness appeared before them. Bruce scrubbed his face as the tension in the room seemed to mount.

"This is insane…"

"JARVIS was the first line of defense…he would've shut Ultron down, it makes sense."

Alice cleared her throat, drawing the patriot's attention and frowning, "He may have been an AI, but remember that without JARVIS we wouldn't have been able to do anything within the last few months."

Bruce shook his head as he circled the 3D rendering. "No, Ultron could've assimilated JARVIS. This isn't strategy, this is…rage."

No one had heard when Thor had reappeared in the lab, his path being to that of the billionaire. Without warning he grabbed Tony by his throat and lifted him clear from the ground stirring Steve into action to prevent a further fight.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!"

Clint sighed, "It's goin' around."

Tony grunted as he attempted to make enough room that the Asgardian may simply drop him, "C'mon use your words, Buddy."

"I've more than enough words to describe you, Stark."

Steve finally managed to get between the two men, Thor dropping Tony with little grace as the billionaire fell backwards into one of his work benches. "Thor! The Legionnaire?"

"Trail went cold about a hundred miles out," the Asgardian grunted, his anger clear in his features, "but it's headed North and it has the scepter. Now we have to retrieve it, _again_."

Natasha shook her head, "Genie's out of that bottle. Clear and present is Ultron."

"I don't understand," Helen's voice broke through the team's chatter and silencing the group completely as the woman turned to look at both Tony and Bruce. "You built this program. Why is it trying to kill us?"

Alice's eyebrows shot straight up her forehead when Tony sputtered a laugh, the sound manic and borderline panicked as he snorted. Beside him, Bruce attempted to signal the man to stop, but was ignored as the tension that had already settled thickly over the room seemed to intensify as Thor stepped forward challengingly, his brows pulled tightly into a furrow and a snarl on his lips.

"You think this is _funny_?"

"No," Tony snorted before seeming to collect himself if only for a moment. "It's probably not, right? Is this very terrible? It is so…is it so…it is. It's so terrible."

The mutant stepped away from Clint and closer to the billionaire and ignoring the looks shot at her from both Steve and Thor. "Tony you need to breathe, just –"

"No…nope, you don't get to give directions here, Wonderland." Tony jabbed a finger in her direction, a warning in his voice that was bordering on manic as a snarl started to curl at his lip, "I'm breathing…I'm _fine_!"

"Well you sure as shit don't seem fine," Alice snorted as her back straightened as if pulling herself up higher would make him more intimidated. The Asgardian's eyes bounced back and forth between the two as he took in their tense stances before he sighed in exasperation.

"This could've been avoided if you hadn't played with something you don't understand."

"No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It is funny." Tony growled, pushing Alice from his path to the Asgardian and Thor steadying her silently and placing her behind him as if the motion were a habit as he met the man's challenge, "It's a _hoot_ that you don't get why we _need_ this."

Bruce swallowed, "Tony, maybe this might not be the time to –"

" _Really_!? That's it? You just roll over and show your belly every time somebody snarls?"

"Only when I've created a murder bot!"

"We didn't," Tony frowned as he glared at the other scientist. "We weren't even close. Were we close to an interface!?"

Bruce had no shame in nodding, tucking his hands into his pockets as if attempting to quell his anger before he Hulked out. Steve sighed deeply, "Well, you did something right. And you did it right here. The Avengers were supposed to be _different_ than S.H.I.E.L.D."

"Anybody remember when I carried a nuke through a wormhole?"

When the group began arguing and protesting over each other, Rhodey shook his head, sarcasm heavily coating his words like sugared knives, "Nope, it's never come up."

"Saved New York!?"

"Never heard that," Rhodey continued as he met his friend's ire. Tony scoffed as he glared around at the group.

"Recall that? A hostile alien army came charging through a hole in space. We're standin' three hundred feet below it. We're _The Avengers_. We can bust arms dealers all the live long day, but that… _up there_? That's…that's the endgame." As the protests quieted he turned his eyes to meet Steve's. "How were you guys planning on beating that?"

"Together."

Tony stared at him for a long moment before a broken whisper seemed to tumble from his very core, "We'll lose."

"Then we'll do that together, too." The patriot only offered the man a small quirk of his lips in comfort before he looked at the rest of the group. "Thor's right. Ultron's calling us out. And I'd like to find him before he's ready for us. The world's a big place…let's start making it smaller."

Alice brushed her fringe from her eyes before sighing softly, "I'll start trying to see if I can use the web to narrow down where he could have gone…may not have much luck, but it's a start."

"I'll join you," Natasha nodded before glancing at Jodi and frowning, "I'd ask you to come along as well, but you may want to rest that head of yours."

Jodi nodded forlornly, "Yeah…can someone make sure to wake me up every hour or so?"

"I'll take care of it," Maria volunteered with a small smile at the woman, "C'mon…you can listen to Rhodey and I as we make calls."

"Sounds great."

As the three began to leave, Clint turned to both Alice and Natasha, "I'll join you two after I make some calls…see if any of my old contacts can give us any leads."

"Sure." Natasha smiled, "meet us in Alice's lab."

"You got it."

It didn't take long for each member of the team to find something to do, whether it was actually beneficial or not was a completely different question as Thor and Steve decided to try and clean up the main area of the penthouse and brew coffee; leaving Tony and Bruce in the lab to try and pick up the pieces that Ultron undoubtedly left behind.

**-0-**

For the hours into the early morning that followed, Clint disappeared periodically with his phone to his ear and murmuring quietly – Alice and Natasha both knew he was speaking to his wife and kids (the Bartons had had plans that weekend that obviously needed to be cancelled) and whenever anyone shot him a glance the two women dismissed it quickly. Natasha sat in the main lab in front of a computer in an effort to find out what things Ultron was currently trying to access, the mutant tapping out after she failed continuously to follow any trail he may have left; Maria and Jodi keeping focus on any military intel including nuclear codes and any areas that dealt in technology or advance weaponry. Steve had been running point on reassuring different agencies that the Avengers had everything in hand, something he was working on with Rhodey - the Colonel having left early that morning to report to the Pentagon - and that left Alice, Bruce and Tony.

The programmer, scientist and engineer were taking inventories of exactly what had gone missing in the labs, Tony taking time to see if anything could be done about what the hostile AI had done to JARVIS.

Pausing in her typing, the mutant glanced over at the billionaire to see that he was mindlessly working on his tablet – his brows pinched and a storm brewing behind the darkness in his eyes. The team had laid into him hard the night before despite her trying to defuse the situation and had placed complete blame on him. Brushing her bangs from her eyes she sighed softly, turning to face him fully and ignoring Bruce's look of warning.

"It's not your fault, Tony."

A scoff answered her almost immediately before he verbalized his thoughts, "Team doesn't think so."

A quiet Tony was never a good Tony and Alice knew she had her work cut out for her. She hit a button on her screen, allowing her program to continue running as she stepped away and siding up to him. Reaching out she placed a hand on his arm and drawing his eyes to her, the mutant meeting his gaze and holding his glare with a steady look of her own.

"While I would have appreciated knowing what you were up to, Tony, I don't blame you for wanting to build something that makes everyone safer…it's why Pepper hasn't been around as much and it's why you've been steadily drinking more and more." She softened her gaze, mindful of how temperamental he was at the moment, "If it's one thing I've learned since being a part of this team it's that we rebound fast. But goddamn it you need to stop putting everything on yourself all of the time…talk to us or if anything at least talk to me. You know I'm not going to give you shit just because you have an idea. We're engineers and it's part of us to want to be more than ourselves."

"No, you're a _hacker_ , Wonderland." He snapped at her, fire burning within him. When she didn't flinch away from him he couldn't help the anger that burned red in his vision. "So don't bother me with the whole _I've-been-alive-longer-than-thou_ bullshit you like to shove down everyone's throats."

She stiffened, but didn't move away from him as he snarled at her. "Fine…I understand. If you want to talk, I'll be over here, but don't think for a second that we're done with this conversation." She sighed softly, "You may be in the business to self-destruct, but I'm not going to let you because as much as you don't like to admit it I actually count you as a friend…and I don't let my friends kill themselves without at least giving me a good reason why first."

Tony watched as she moved away from him, giving him a final pat on his arm and returning to where she began working on her monitor once more. The three continued silently with Bruce wincing slightly and offering the mutant a look of sympathy, but Alice ignored it. As far as she was concerned this whole situation could have been avoided if _both_ Bruce and Tony had mentioned it or at least let the team know they wanted to run a few tests on the scepter to see if they could launch an AI program to assist them. She understood the team's general skepticism around what Tony and Bruce were capable of, hell even _she_ had been questioned multiple times, but she never once believed she was above the team.

Her mind quickly drew back to her secret side mission and she winced to herself. _What a little hypocrite you've become, Alice_. She told herself with a snort, her eyes scanning the information in front of her screen.

Bruce watched the goings on of the small room that he occupied with Tony and Alice and sighed deeply. He knew that Alice and Tony at the very least had an understanding of the other, but the engineer never bothered to consult her on anything. Bruce didn't know if that was because the billionaire didn't appreciate not knowing everything or he didn't appreciate that the mutant carried a very old soul and tended to offer advice without being asked. There was a lot about the relationship between the mutant and billionaire that he didn't understand. But, his mind whispered, if they had brought Alice in on the programming part of the Ultron project, would the result have been different?

He shook his head, adjusting his glasses and watching as Alice removed her glasses from her nose, setting them aside and running her hands down her face in an effort to give herself some form of relief since she had been up since the night before trying to work out where Ultron had gone with Natasha's help. Granted, none of them had gotten sleep, only taking brief breaks to take a shower and get changed before jumping right back into work. He had overheard her when she had finally walked away from the computer with the former spy that she felt absolutely useless at the one job she was able to contribute to the team since she was having significant issues with locating the bot. He watched as she leaned her elbows on the desk she had been sat at, her face hidden in her hands and taking deep breaths. Finally he turned his attention back to the video feed in front of him, maybe if he took a closer look at it something would jump out at him and he could force the engineer and programmer into working together.

" _No, not yet. Not this chrysalis._ " Ultron's robotic voice sounded from Bruce's computer and Alice briefly separated her fingers to look up at the scientist, watching the deep furrow in his brow as he rubbed his chin before shaking his head in exasperation.

"It can read vocal stress patterns, adrenaline spikes…"

Tony frowned from his computer, "None of that was in the schematic we launched."

"He had a self-constructed learning spiral."

"In his language database," The billionaire frowned as he continued working on his computer. "He was supposed to learn slang, not go insane."

"Missed that mark," Alice grumped to herself and ignoring the glares shot at her from both engineer and scientist as she reached for her coffee.

She hadn't asked for anything fancy, just a black coffee – which had surprised Steve when he had heard it since he knew she tended to prefer some form of sweetness to her beverages – and she hated it. It was gross and had gone cold hours ago, but it served its purpose as it distracted her briefly from being exhausted.

Bruce shook his head before glancing back at Tony, "You're assuming it did."

"Look, we both know the guy has anger issues," He replied sarcastically as he hedged a finger at the scientist, moving away from his computer as he did, "which not to point a finger…"

"We told him to _solve_ the world."

Tony stared at the man before his hands splayed onto the desk and he sighed deeply. Alice glanced back and forth between the two of them in confusion. "You said that he had a self-constructed learning spiral…When you developed JARVIS, did you give him the same kind of matrixing?" The two men looked at her and she raised her hands in surrender, "My thought is that if that was _inside_ of his programming…maybe it'll help us figure out what went so wrong."

"I don't think it'll help." Bruce answered before Tony could as he rubbed the bridge of his nose, "When we coded his language database we wanted the program to be able to communicate with anyone, at any age, any ethnicity in any language and to be able to do so in a way that would make the AI relatable."

The engineer shook his head, "And yes. JARVIS was made with the same database since he started out as a natural language UI, but then he developed as his database grew."

"So you gave him the ability to gather information in very much the same way that Ultron did… _does_." Alice frowned as she cupped her chin in thought. "I'll be honest, I don't know much about JARVIS's matrixing because I never bothered to hack him to find out…but when you said that you didn't come close to an interface, what did you mean?"

"The gem inside the scepter," Tony began with a flippant wave of his hand and earning a glare from the mutant as he seemed to condescend her, which wasn't unusual for him, "was the main power source to whatever Strucker had been working on. His lab was jam-packed with advanced robotics work, but JARVIS had said that he was ciphering code when he was scanning it."

"Okay, but that still doesn't answer my question."

Bruce snorted a short laugh before smiling at her, "JARVIS was pure code. Whatever was inside of the gem on Loki's scepter looked more like a brain. It _acted_ like a brain would."

Alice considered the two explanations for a moment before a frown tugged at her lips, "Completely hypothetical, but obviously _not_ , what would you do if you had never had a thought before…not even one and suddenly you woke up not understanding _anything_? Then you have to find answers yourself based on a statement made with no context in reference to your existence...He has a language database that is refined enough that he was meant to pick up on slang, but did you also add program that would allow him to _interpret_ slang?"

Bruce and Tony stared at one another before glancing back at the mutant. There was no judgement in her stare, but she was asking based on information she had vaguely acquired by listening to their conversation and their explanations. Would the rest of the team been receptive if it had been explained?

Finally Tony sighed, "No. JARVIS didn't need one, so I didn't add one to this system."

The three sat in silence for a moment before Alice sighed deeply as she stood, "Well…let's hope that while he's trying to _solve the world_ , that he doesn't take his rage at us out on others. I'm going to go get more coffee, do you guys want any?"

When both men shook their heads and the mutant nodded, deciding to leave the tense atmosphere of the small room off from the lab and stepping down to where Natasha was still working on cycling through their information and chasing leads on where Ultron could have gone. Alice offered her a brief wave, noticing the steaming mug on the coaster beside her computer, before stepping to where a coffee machine had been brought into the lab and pouring herself a cup. Currently, she was on a video call with Rhodey as she hit another dead end.

"We're getting access denied on all basic information streams." She sighed before taking a sip of her coffee, humming when Alice approached and moving over so the mutant could join her. Rhodey sighed from the other side of the screen with a shake of his head.

" _Yeah,_ " He scoffed slightly before biting his lip in frustration. " _Well, you guys are definitely off the Pentagon's Christmas list._ _Every country with a nuke is fighting a cyber-attack. War Machine is being deployed to the Middle East, in case certain people start blaming each other instead of you._ " As he spoke, Tony stepped up next to the desk with a furrow to his brow.

"Okay, well, hold that thought." Tony stated with his hand raised, concern washing over his face, "Let me overnight you a new encryption drive for your suit in case Ultron wants in." He showed his friend a drive already packaged and ready to go earning a small smile from the Colonel.

" _Got you. Thanks._ "

"You hear something we need to hear it too," Natasha stated and earning a nod from Rhodey in reply, his eyebrows rose as if trying to lighten the situation some.

" _Hey, that goes both ways_." His face then dropped into one of seriousness, " _Watch your six_."

"You too," Natasha answered before closing out the call. Alice sighed as she took a deep pull from her mug, wincing at the taste but knowing she'd need it regardless. Natasha looked over to her with a small frown, "You good?"

"Wonderful," She drawled before running a hand through her bangs once again and resting her forehead on the heel of her palm as she glanced out of the corner of her eye at the woman. "Next time…no parties. Bad things always happen at parties."

Natasha snorted, taking a sip of her own coffee before both women looked up as Steve entered the lab with a tablet in his hands and looking back at Thor who had followed him inside. "Any help from on high?"

The Asgardian shook his head as he rubbed his hands together anxiously, "Heimdall's either away from his post or he's been ordered not to answer." His brow set into a determined scowl as he met the patriot's stride. "But Ultron can't hide forever, we'll find him."

"Well he's not exactly hiding."

Thor took the offered tablet and glanced down at the image set on the screen before growling lowly to himself. The billionaire had reappeared after sending out the drive for Rhodey's suit and sided up next to the behemoth, "What's this?" Thor glared at the man before smacking the tablet against his chest and earning a disgruntled look from Tony as he took it and glanced down at the screen. Steve sighed deeply before glancing at the team, nodding his head to Bruce who had come from the other room to hear the commotion.

"It's a message. Ultron killed Strucker."

"And he did a Banksy at the crime scene," Tony remarked with mocked enthusiasm before continuing dryly, "Just for us."

Alice sighed as she buried her face in her hands once more, "Wonderful."

"This is good," Natasha stated after a moment, taking the tablet from Tony and examining the screen. Alice briefly got a glance at it seeing the man leaned up against the wall with the word _Peace_ written out in blood next to where his body had been found. Bruce scoffed in surprise.

"No, that's not good!"

"He's showing us his hand," She explained as she looked up at him. "This isn't his pattern. Why send a message when you've just given a speech?"

Steve seemed to connect the dots faster than anyone else, "Strucker knew something that Ultron wanted us to miss."

Alice envied the patriot for the serum pumping through his veins as he seemed unbothered from the lack of sleep. Having studied the serum so closely she knew that this was a direct result from it. Almost as if Steve knew what she was thinking he glanced at her with a question in his eyes and earning a wince in reply from the mutant as she took another long sip from her cup. He smirked as he understood the clear cut _go fuck yourself_ without her saying it as it was a playful argument the two of them have had over the last three years of their friendship.

The former spy nodded before glancing back at her computer, "Yeah, I bet he…" she drew off suddenly as everything disappeared from the screen including the file they had on Strucker, "Yep. Everything we had on Strucker has been wiped."

"And that's good?"

Alice looked up at Bruce and grunted unintelligibly, "No…it just makes our job just a tad more difficult."

Her comment was ignored as Tony's eyes lit up, "Not everything…c'mon, I keep hard files in the storage room. Thor, Steve."

The two men followed after the billionaire and grabbing Clint on their way out as the archer had just been returning to the lab. In the meantime, Natasha leaned over to the mutant and rubbing her back in comfort earning a grunt from the mutant.

"I think you're misinterpreting my grumpiness and lack of sleep for hopelessness."

The woman snorted, "Then what is it?"

"It's the feeling of _grumpy_ and _sleepy_ mixed in with general annoyance that this bot has rendered me obsolete."

"That there is the problem," Natasha sighed before leaning away from the mutant, reading that she wasn't in the mood for comfort any more than she seemed to be in the mood for anything including her coffee. But Natasha knew Alice well enough that it was a way for the mutant to hide that she was unnerved by feeling like she didn't have anything to bring to the table. "You already broke down what Bruce and Tony couldn't about this murder bot. _Yes_ , I heard you guys talking. Don't let it get to you."

"Thanks, Nat." She sighed before taking another sip of coffee. "Maybe I'll be able to sleep after this entire mess…honestly, I think we all deserve it after all this bullshit."

Natasha snorted, glancing up as the men came back into the room with a series of boxes in each of their hands. Steve dropped his pile of boxes on the floor next to the mutant and Russian before offering them a tired smile, "Known associates."

" _Yay_ ," Alice cheered with fake enthusiasm before dragging herself up from her chair and grabbing the first box on top of the stack and moving off to the side to begin working on the files inside.

After an hour of working through the boxes, with Thor tossing them randomly when he found nothing useful and receiving glares from Tony and a snort from Alice, Steve sighed deeply, "Well, Strucker had a lot of friends."

"Well," Bruce hummed as he set another file to the side, "these people are all horrible."

Tony closed the file he had been looking at before glancing at Bruce's and stopping suddenly, "Wait, I know that guy!" The scientist glanced at him briefly before handing over the file when Tony made a _give me_ hand motion, taking the file and glancing it over, "From back in the day. He operates off the African coast, black market arms." He looked up after a moment, noticing the accusing look on Steve's face and sighing in exasperation, "There are conventions, alright? You meet people…I didn't sell him anything."

Alice snorted as she looked at Bruce, "They really do have conventions for everything." The scientist nodded with an amused smile in response.

"He was talking about finding something new, a game changer…it was all very _Ahab_."

Thor's eyes narrowed as he looked over the pictures in the file before pointing at one, "This."

"Uh, it's a tattoo. I don't think he had it…"

"No, _those_ are tattoos, _this_ is a brand."

Bruce took the file back and allowing Alice to get a look. It showed images of a Caucasian man with skin that looked deeply tanned and leathery from being out in the sun constantly; dark tribal tattoos curling up from underneath his shirt and up his neck as well as an angry and scarred over symbol which she could only assume was the brand that Thor had mentioned. The two looked at one another before silently agreeing to head to the computers, Bruce looking into the brand and Alice using the information Tony had supplied to triangulate a location.

After a few moments, Bruce spoke as the database they had been using found a match to the symbol, "Yeah…it's a word in an African dialect meaning _thief_ …in a much less friendly way."

Steve's brow furrowed, "What dialect?"

"Wakanada?" Bruce attempted to pronounce before readjusting his glasses and looking again as if unsure, "Wa…Wa…Wakanda?"

Tony and Steve immediately shared a look that spelled nothing good for the team before the billionaire frowned, "If this guy got out of Wakanda with some of their trade goods…"

"I thought your father said he got the last of it?" Steve frowned.

"I don't follow," Bruce frowned as he looked between the two men, "What comes out of Wakanda?"

Tony smiled humorlessly, "The strongest metal on earth."

"Well it's a starting point." Steve sighed deeply before looking over at where the mutant was sitting at the other computer, her fingers moving quickly over the keys. "Alice, you got a location?"

The computer beeped suddenly and she allowed a small smile to ghost her lips, "Yep, looks like he's operating out of an old shipyard in Maputo, South Africa – about fifty klicks from the coastline. It looks like all of the ships in the yard are abandoned and grounded so he won't be escaping by water."

"Klicks?"

"Fifty kilometers, or thirty one miles give or take," Alice converted for the Asgardian as she stood from her chair and nodded. "I'm coming too. Maybe I can at least stall him long enough to give you guys an edge if I'm within proximity."

Bruce glanced back and forth between Alice and the team before shrugging, "It actually might work…she's a lot faster than I am."

"Alright, suit up." Steve nodded before stopping the mutant as she went to step around him, "but I don't want you too close in the field. I know you can handle yourself, but field work isn't a strong suit and we both know that."

Alice nodded in agreement, "Yeah, I'm aware. Besides, I'd much rather stay out of the nuclear Titanic if I can avoid it."

The patriot snorted on a laugh before nodding and the mutant took that as her cue to get herself put together.

Alice had no desire to be in the field and within fighting distance of Ultron at least until she knew what she was up against and so she forewent her Hellcat suit and slid into a pair of TAC pants that she tucked into her steel toed boots, a Kevlar turtleneck and her vest that held her weapons before equipping her bracer to her wrist. She shook her hair out of the chignon it had been in the night before and pulled it back into a low ponytail before stepping out of her area of the locker room and making her way to the loading bay for the quinjet.

Without waiting for the others, the mutant quickly went about double checking the medical supplies on board and making sure they had everything they could need in the event that one of them became injured and nodded to herself when everything appeared as normal. A few moments later found Natasha and Steve approaching; discussing something in low tones that missed her ears and not paying any mind to them as she sat herself down and began mindlessly playing with a knife she kept on her person.

After the events of D.C. Alice had been extremely sad to have lost the knife set that Clint had gotten made for her after their first year knowing each other. It had been shortly after she had mastered the weapon, as it was her preferred weapon beside her whip chain. She had used them during the fight with Bucky and when she had been taken captive they had stripped her of her effects and had locked them in a safe. Upon realizing that the bank she had been held in had burned down after an explosion, she had resigned herself to never seeing those knives again. Shaking her head of the thought she looked up just as the patriot and former spy stepped into the cabin and noticed her sitting there.

"You're ready to go?"

"As ready as I'll ever be," Alice smiled without humor before shrugging her shoulders. "I don't have plans on leaving the jet if I don't have to."

"We've actually got an idea for that. But the plan depends on the structural integrity of the ship that Klaue uses as his point of business." Natasha smirked before waving her over to the central panel that Tony had built into the cabin.

It acted as a large computer with 3D rendering capabilities as most of his technology was equipped with in order to make it easier for the team to visualize objectives. It also served as an exam table if Alice needed to work on extensive injuries as it allowed her to project a screen that she could magnify the wound to get a closer look or do scans of a body in order to tell her where an injury had been sustained if it wasn't an obvious wound. Both Tony and the mutant had worked together to make what they merely called the HUB an accessibility for when she did help out in the field and had worked to install it into the other jet that they rarely used as well.

A few moments later found the rest of the team on the jet and Clint beginning the sequence for takeoff. As soon as they were in the air, Steve turned to the rest of the group. "Alright team, based on what we're dealing with I think it's best we go about this with caution, but with a goal to try and end this here and now. Alice, can you narrow down which ship Klaue is operating out of?"

"Easy enough," She shrugged before double tapping her bracer and bringing the three dimensional screen to life.

With a few presses against the rendering, the mutant was easily able to pull up the shipyard where their quarry was hiding out in. Using a satellite to bounce her signal off of she imputed a few more keystrokes before holding the image and casting it onto the HUB so the team could get a better look. The image projected was of the yard with multiple abandoned ships all in various forms of disrepair with the exception of two: the first, while standing had a large hole blown into the hole of the ship where the second one was a complete ship and while in disrepair, looked the most sound of any other ship in the yard. She hummed for a moment before activating another panel on the HUB and bringing up schematics for the building by triangulating the geothermal structure of the ground beneath the ship.

"Good news is this is definitely the right ship. Bad news is that while the ship is grounded pretty solidly, it's only in the ground about thirty feet down…far enough to keep the ship upright and to have built a small vault underground, but not enough to keep it standing if something extreme hits it."

Bruce forced a smile, "You mean me."

"Well…yes and no." She answered with an apologetic smile. "Yes, something like the Hulk on the inside of that ship could easily take the entire thing down and compromise it's integrity, however; considering Klaue is an arms dealer and has access to _who knows what_ , we could be looking at WMDs of various capacities."

"Fair enough."

"What I'm thinking is this," Steve stated after considering the 3D diagram the mutant had projected. "Tony, Thor and I will go for the main approach. We're not just dealing with Ultron and the Maximoffs; we're also going to be dealing with Klaue's men. Clint and Nat, you two will flank and focus on taking out as many of these guys as you can – leave Ultron and the Enhanced to us. Banner, you stay here in the quinjet with Alice and wait for our signal…if we need a code green, we'll radio you in and Alice you do everything you can to slow this guy down. We've got reports that Ultron somehow has control of other robots and is using them to do the heavy lifting, you shut them down."

Alice nodded her head in understanding. If they were trying to steal vibranium it made sense for her to focus her attention more on the other bots rather than Ultron himself. It was then agreed that Tony would fly in first to get scans of the ship to confirm if Ultron and the Maximoffs were there; if they were, Clint would cut the power to the facility and the plan would proceed as normal. Alice leaned her head back into her seat and sighed softly, allowing her eyes to close for a few moments in an effort to get a brief catnap in.

Natasha looked around the cabin, her eyes studying each member before she turned her attention back to Steve. While it wasn't a private place to speak, she felt no remorse in sharing her thoughts especially when she noticed the deeper breaths that the mutant took and signifying that she had dozed off. "Moral's real low…"

"Yeah no kidding," The patriot scoffed lightly as he adjusted his glove. "I don't know about you, but I'm used to things being pretty black and white in regards to what we do…since D.C. everything's been one shade of gray to the next."

She smiled tightly, "Well if I've learned anything in this business it's to pay attention to the gray."

"Doesn't really help when your own team is the gray."

"I can't say anything to that since I'm my very own shade." She crossed her arms, shifting her weight slightly. "Alice's work wasn't breeched."

Steve stopped adjusting his uniform to look up at the former spy, noticing the woman wasn't looking at him but observing the rest of the team. After a brief moment she met his eyes and nodded. "It wasn't?"

"No, Alice had said she had backed everything up to an external hard drive before she had come up for the party. Apparently she doesn't keep anything saved directly to her hard drive." She offered him a small and comforting smile, "Everything she's been working on, on the side with you and Sam, wasn't breeched. Her other things…well that's a different story. Thankfully, her facial recognition program isn't fully completed just yet, but her code-breaking program, the IR program and POE system…that's a different story."

Steve glanced in the mutant's direction to see that she was now awake and speaking to Bruce, more than likely going over their side of the plan. The scientist had said that if he was going to just wait around until he was called that he would try and help Alice in isolating the bot within the previously outlined area. After a moment of observing her and the more weighted expressions that crossed her face, the exhaustion and the self-doubt that seemed to underline each and every rise and fall of her thin shoulders he suddenly seemed to understand why she had been so grumpy the last few hours.

"I think we all need a win right now…but we're going into this at a disadvantage," Natasha sighed. "He has both Tony and Alice's programs which means that we don't have an advantage there…"

"No, but we've got the element of surprise."

The former spy shrugged once more, "I sincerely hope you're right. We could really use the moral boost that's for sure."

"Yeah…I know we do."

Nearly thirty minutes later found the team landing in Maputo, South Africa just outside of the Salvage Yard that housed Klaue's arms dealing outfit. No sooner had they landed, the team quickly set about getting to work. They had each fit an earpiece into their ears and with that everyone but Bruce and Alice made their way out of the jet and towards _The Churchill_ , the mutant assuming it had been chosen for Klaue's original ties to the UK before becoming a citizen of South Africa. They had left the hatch of the jet open in the event a code green was called as neither Bruce nor Alice wanted the Hulk to accidentally rip apart their only way home.

As the moments flew by, the mutant got herself situated at the computer that was set up off to the side of the main cabin and began slowly working her way through the web in an effort to find abnormalities that would tell her Ultron was in the vicinity. She knew she had to be careful as she worked her way through; anything could tip the bot off that they were there and the team still needed at least some element of surprise. After a moment she got a ping and she immediately activated her earpiece.

"I've got positive ID that Ultron is here."

" _Great, thanks. We'll reach back out as soon as we need an assist…just focus on any nearby drones in the area._ "

The mutant nodded as Steve's voice met her ears, "Copy."

It then became a waiting game as Bruce and Alice observed the data stream. They didn't have to wait much longer as sounds of explosions and fighting seemed to echo throughout the yard as men ran from _The Churchill_ screaming and yelling. Both scientist and mutant glanced outside of the jet to notice Ultron disappearing into the air with Tony hot on his heels and Alice raced back to her spot in front of the computer, activating her earpiece as she did.

"Guys do you read me?" A jumbled mess was her answer and she growled, "He jammed our coms."

"Can you get it back?"

"I can certainly try."

Bruce nodded before working on the other side of the jet, and attempting to test the intercom for the jet that also connected to the team's earpieces in an effort to see if he could find another way to reach the team. When he was unsuccessful, he began to pace and rubbing his hands in anxiousness. The mutant knew that this was his way of remaining calm and to prevent himself from transforming without warning. Time seemed to blend together and Alice frowned as she looked down at the computer screen in front of her, her fingers working to try and unjam the communications between the team and the quinjet as Bruce continued to pace.

"Guys…is this a code green?" Bruce called into the intercom only to receive more jarbled communication back and Bruce frowned as he looked to the mutant. "Anything on your end? I'm still getting nothing over here…"

"No. He's good," She murmured as the program booted her out and rerouted her once again, her eyes narrowing in concentration. "This is like nothing I've ever encountered before."

"He's booting you out that easily?"

She didn't spare Bruce a glance as she continued her rapid keystrokes, "He's toying with me. Hacking S.H.I.E.L.D – child's play, hacking the Pentagon took me about ten minutes of my lunch break, the FBI and CIA databases took me an hour and hacking Tony's systems _with_ Jarvis was just to see if I could. He's boxing me into corners of the interweb where it's impossible to squeeze out of."

The doctor watched as the frustration gathered on her face, her bottom lip caught between her teeth as she worked. The Avengers had assured her she wouldn't be needed for field work at least until her semester finished, but it was painstakingly clear that it wasn't possible considering what they were up against. They would need a hacker and Hellcat was a hacker and a damn good one, but what they hadn't anticipated was how clever Ultron had truly become.

"Is there any way to bypass his codes?"

"Not that I can find." She frowned, "He keeps me from branching out long enough to find an escape. And the bots that he's commandeered I can't access either…it's almost like a shared consciousness…a hive mind."

He considered this for a moment before a determined frown came to his face, "I'm going to see what's happening."

"I don't think that's a great idea…"

"I'm only stepping outside to see if I can hear anything. Communications are down and it doesn't look like Ultron is going to let you get them back up…just let me see what's going on and we'll make a plan from there."

"Okay…I'll keep trying to fight my way through his digital fire and see what I can do…just call if you need me."

Bruce smiled, "I will."

As the moments ticked by, Alice soon found that everything was…much too quiet.

Something was wrong and she quickly abandoned her computer after failing again to find a work around past Ultron. The heat of the South African air hit her first and she readied a knife in the event that she would have to fight. Her heart thundered in her chest when she suddenly heard Bruce – no, the Hulk's – roar of rage and she ran down the gangway and onto the African soil. As she turned the corner she saw the Hulk, eyes a scarlet red, roar once more and she raised her hands in surrender.

"C'mon…I know I'm not Natasha, but it's okay…you're okay, Bruce."

 _Bruce_ was apparently the wrong word to use as the Hulk roared once more, the veins in his body bulging and rippling before his hand lashed out and sent the mutant flying into the tree line behind her. Alice gasped and groaned as the air was knocked from her lungs and while she _hurt_ at least she hadn't slammed into a tree. Pushing herself up from the ground she wheezed, feeling her muscles already healing themselves as well as refusing the broken ribs that resulted from the Hulk's smack. " _Shit_ ," She groaned suddenly as she pushed herself onto her knees, taking a few moments to regain some more of her breath before stumbling to her feet. "That almost seemed restrained for him…memo to self _don't mention Bruce in front of the Hulk_." She shook her head, her arm cradling her midsection as a habit as her mutation worked easily to heal the damage left behind and soon she found herself next to the jet once more.

Alice stilled suddenly before ducking down and sweeping her leg out and catching the body of what she could only assumed was one of the Enhanced that accompanied Ultron. He had silver tipped hair and youthful features and was donned in athletics wear and was now sprawled on the ground just off to the side of her and she blinked in surprise. His eyes were wide with surprise as he looked back to her and the mutant wasted no time in completing her spin and standing. She knew if he was there that his sister was sure to follow and she snapped her hand out as she spun once again only for her fist to find resistance and glancing down at it she saw that her hand was caught in a scarlet red energy field and as she looked up she met the female twin's eyes briefly before the wind was knocked from her lungs once more as the speedster knocked her off of her feet and away from his sister.

Just as the mutant attempted to push herself back up, she found the boots of the female twin and sneakers of her brother standing before her and she barely glanced up before the girl's eyes lit scarlet and with a wave of her hand the energy lashed out at the mutant's mind and darkness flooded her vision suddenly. The last thing she heard before succumbing completely to the darkness was the girl's gasp and broken sob before hearing her brother's concerned calling.

* * *

**Graphic content ahead. Please proceed to the next page break if you do not wish to read this part as the following section may be triggering. You do not need to read this section to be able to understand what happens afterwards and so you will not miss anything should you decide to skip. If you plan to read forward, please proceed with caution as some scenes may be disturbing. - Eirlys**

* * *

Alice's eyes snapped open suddenly and she winced at the light that seemed to flood her vision. Running a hand down her face she waited until she was able to orient herself before she attempted to open her eyes once more.

An odd sense of dread filled her as she took in her surroundings.

The room she found herself in was a bedroom of sorts, a large duvet covering most of her body and obscuring it from view. The walls were painted a soft crème with accented wallpapered walls with neutral pinstripes that broke up the colors in the room. The bed was a simple four poster frame of a dark wood that matched the other furniture in the room including the vanity and makeup table combination. As she set her feet down on the floor she allowed herself to register the floral printed rug that spread to cover the hard wood floor and a frown twitched at her lips.

Why did these surroundings seem familiar?

After another moment of trying to orient herself, she finally managed the strength to stand and made her way over to the vanity mirror as if the action was a natural part of her routine. The woman who stared back at her nearly confused her as she was suddenly hit with a sense of déjà vu. Dark hair was set in curlers, her face bare and healthy looking and she was donned in a silk, rose pink nightdress that fell just below her knees. With a shaky breath, she glanced at her right arm and slowly turned the inside of her arm outwards so she could look at it and was greeted by the appearance of smooth skin – the numbers that once were branded and scarred over there were gone and she felt anxiety settle into her gut. Glancing around she noticed a matching robe just set off to the side and quickly pulled it over her naked shoulders and cinching it around her waist and seating herself at the vanity. As if the movements were normal she began unraveling the curling set and set to styling the ringlets properly, watching as her fringe curtained her brow after she managed to brush through them.

Giving herself a once over, she stood and made for the door only to find herself in a hallway that had wallpapered walls and a runner covering the hardwood. There were pictures that were hung at different intervals on the wall, but even as Alice passed them a glance she could not discern the images they carried. With a furrow to her brow she rounded the corner and stopped in the doorway as her heart turned to ice in her chest.

"I was wonderin' if you were gonna wake up, Doll!"

Words jumbled together in her throat as if caught in a traffic jam, her tongue seeming to be glued to the roof of her mouth as she attempted to form words. Standing in the humble kitchen was a man with dark and neatly combed hair and striking gun-metal blue eyes with his sleeves rolled up to his elbows and an apron that covered the sharp looking button up and ironed trousers.

"Bucky?"

The former soldier offered her a dazzling smile before it seemed to fall at the notice of the hesitance in her voice. "You alright, Doll? I mean, I know you weren't feeling well last night so I hope you don't mind that I started makin' breakfast…I don't know much, but I can make a mean omelet!"

Breath seemed to cut itself from Alice's lungs as her heart hammered against her chest uncomfortably as it rattled her ribcage. Her eyes immediately darted to his left arm to see it was whole and she immediately concluded that her mind was playing tricks on her, but despite her inner distress she felt her body relax slightly almost as if she had merely been surprised rather than having a mental crisis.

"I'm sorry, love, I just wasn't expecting you to be out here this morning."

The words tasted like stale honey in her mouth, but as much as she tried to resist, it almost seemed funny. This was her Bucky wasn't it? Roguish, handsome and _alive_ … and almost as if against her will she found herself falling into the false sense of security as his concern disarmed her completely.

"You seein' ghosts again?" Bucky frowned as he set the skillet aside and stepped towards her, seizing her arms gently at the elbows and allowing his thumbs to track comforting arches along the skin hidden beneath her robe. "I know it's been rough since the war, but we got every reason to celebrate!"

"Celebrate?"

His brow furrowed, his head cocking to the side, "Yeah, Doll, don'cha remember? We got Lottie's birthday this afternoon."

Alice glanced at the newspaper that sat opened on the table, her eyes not able to discern images that were printed across it, but her eyes fixating on the date: _July 9_ _th_ _, 1948_.

"W-What…?"

"You sure you're alright?"

Alice looked up at him and offered him a tight smile in reply as her mind worked through the oddities she was finding since waking up that morning, "Yeah…I – I'm sorry, love, but something…something just seems wrong?" She pressed a hand against her forehead as her eyes clenched, "Have you ever felt something…like an instinct where something's wrong, but you can't seem to find the words to explain how it's wrong?"

Bucky's thumbs continued their arching motion, his eyes seeming to narrow in contemplation before flashing red. As suddenly as it appeared it was gone and Alice could only wonder if she had imagined it.

"We had a rough day yesterday…maybe it's still just an off day. I mean, with the war and everything bein' so recent maybe your mind is just playin' tricks on ya."

"Maybe…"

In a flash the images changed, her pajamas had disappeared and a peach dress replaced it, and she found herself back in the bedroom she had woken up in with Bucky on the other side of the room and removing his tie. She felt her lips twitch into a small smile as he approached her, his right hand sliding along her jaw in a caress and threading the fingers of his left hand with hers. Without so much as a word his head dipped and his lips pressed to hers.

 _This feels wrong_ , she told herself as his gentle ministrations became more possessive, rough. His hand entangled into her hair at the base of her neck with a sharp tug that she hadn't been expecting and as she yelped from the sudden movement his lips found new purchase along the column of her throat.

"Bucky…Bucky hang on, this is too fast."

His husky voice sounded beside her ear as he nuzzled the appendage, his teeth catching her lobe and tugging it almost painfully, "What's the matter, baby?" What would normally have been considered comforting words seemed like honeyed poison to her ears and she looked up at him to see that his demeanor had suddenly changed; she began to feel fear gripping her heart in a vice.

"Ow, Buck…you're – you're hurting me…stop!"

A growl was her answer as she felt her back slam against the wall, her hands immediately pushing against him in hopes of creating space, but her efforts were thwarted as he batted her hands easily aside and pinning her effectively in place. "You're not goin' anywhere…I own you."

Her eyes widened as his voice turned sharp as knives and she felt her throat constricting as she felt her anxiety spiking. Alice felt like ice had been poured into her veins as she tried to remove herself from his grasp with another push in an effort to give herself room. Grunting she tried pulling away further only to glance up at him, his lips twisted into a grin that was almost feral and she winced.

"Bucky let me go!"

"Nah, Doll…you're not goin' anywhere!"

_SLAP!_

Alice stared at her raised hand in horror before her eyes settled on his head turned to the side with the force of her strike, his once neatly combed hair falling before his face and curtaining his expression and she managed to finally back away from him. She didn't get far, however, as her knees hit the edge of the bed nearly tripping her. Her chest heaved with the need for more oxygen as her heart beat almost as if it were attempting to escape from her ribcage; her hands shook and her pulse quivered against the column of her throat and her stomach churned.

With a feral growl, the image of Bucky turned and threw her into the bed, seizing her wrists in his hands and pinning her, leaving her with no room for escape. His once blue eyes burned scarlet red and Alice screwed her eyes shut in an effort to shut out what was about to happen to her. Suddenly the bed beneath her disappeared, the weight on top of her changed and so did the pressure on her wrists.

Where once a soft downed mattress held her weight she could tell was now a cold metal slab; Bucky's hands replaced by cold metal manacles and the weight that had been on top of her was gone. The breeze felt like needles against her naked skin and she could hear the periodic beeping of a machine somewhere behind her. She knew better than to show any outward expression as she felt a slick sensation against her inner thighs and leaking from her core, but it did not stop the inner turmoil from stirring to life in her gut or the fire that licked her veins despite the freezing temperature of the room.

She kept her eyes clenched shut as she heard the adjusting of a belt around a pair of loose pants as they were pulled up from the ground, the sound of a zipper followed and told her that her torture for the moment was over.

She was sadly mistaken.

She nearly cried out when her jaw was seized roughly, her head turned from side to side as she was examined. She could still feel where this man's hands had been, where they lingered and pinched; where his mouth had trailed and left deep wounds against her throat and breasts; where his fingers had dug unmercifully into her skin and leaving deep bruises as if she were a child's dark and twisted finger painting. As she was examined, she ignored the murmurs of doctors as they muttered about the sequences and results of their _experiment_ as they calculated the time it took for her body to heal.

Alice felt herself breaking.

"You're healing faster than ever 87563." Doctor Anthony Harlow drawled breathily and nearly making her recoil, yet still she remained and silent knowing that any expression and her torment would begin again. "You've done _very_ well."

After a moment of complete silence in which the ambient noises of the lab began to fade away, the doctor chuckled as he ran a finger along her cheek, tipping her chin and forcing her to meet his eyes.

"Why so silent, darling? Surely you enjoyed this as much as me?"

Silent and unblinking she remained as she found a fixed point in the wall to stare at as if she could see through his head. Her silence was rewarded with a snicker that raked tendrils of ice down her spine.

"Regardless, my dear, I will be back soon to…finish the job."

Something within her snapped and she began tugging her arm as quietly as possible when his back turned, uncaring if she needed to break the bones to free herself and after some struggle the bind seemed to magically disappear she found herself free and snarling at the man's back.

"I'm not giving you the chance again," She snarled as she snatched his scalpel and stabbed it into his back. Her eyes widened in horror when he turned to face her to show that he no longer had a face before the image flickered into a different man, and then a woman and back and forth it went.

"I suppose not," a cacophony of discordant voices echoed within the single being of the doctor and forcing the mutant to back away suddenly, nearly tripping as she did. " _You always were a monster and the BLOOD ON YOUR HANDS PROVES IT_!"

She stammered, her heart thundering within her breast once more as she looked down at her hands to see that her hands were coated in blood. The scent of iron hit her senses in force and as she looked around the room in her panic she could see the ichor flowing from the walls and pooling on the linoleum floor, bubbling from seemingly nowhere and Alice shrieked as she clambered back on top of the table in an effort to escape the blood as it continued to rise like an ocean around her.

The being began laughing discordantly as many voices overlapped once more, shrieking and shrill and forcing the mutant to cover her ears with trembling hands as tears slid past her clenched eyes. The walls felt as if they were beginning to close in around her and her heart pounded an unwonted symphony against her breast that nearly stole the little air from her lungs and making her stomach twist and turn in anxiety.

"I need to get out…I need to get out….I needtogetout….INEEDTOGETOUT!"

In that moment the door on the side swung open and without hesitation, Alice leapt from the table towards the door as a sob worked its way up her throat as the blood seemed to continue rising around her and seducing her to return as it swirled around her knees in an effort to make her trip so that it could drag her back. With a final push, she made it to the door and ran, nearly sliding into the wall from the substance coating her arms and legs. As she ran she came upon a hallway with a series of doors and in each door was a name carved and etched into it as if a blunt object was used to bury the name in the metal, shadows banging against the doors of each room and joining the screams that echoed around her.

Of the rooms that she passed she barely took time in her panic to notice the familiar visage of thirteen children that bore some of her features and the nine more that ranged in ages of those she had stolen life from in her rage. The rooms then changed suddenly into caskets leaning in place where the doors had once been and at the end of the hallway a door appeared.

Another sob broke past her lips in a hiccup as if invisible hands were attempting to strangle the oxygen from her very lungs. She continued, slamming her body into the door as it came and stopping suddenly to find herself in a grave yard.

With trembling breaths and limbs, she stepped forward into the cold grey scape before her. Thunder rumbled overhead and she soon found herself at the first set of tombstones set in dead and dying grass; thirteen small stones bearing names stood before her:

**Charles Frasier  
Marie Frasier  
Claire Frasier  
Michael Frasier  
John Frasier  
Elizabeth Frasier  
Mary Frasier  
William Frasier  
Annette Frasier  
Harold Frasier  
George Frasier  
Alexander Frasier  
Emma Frasier**

The names of the thirteen children she had attempted to bring to life sat before her and she found herself covering her mouth to stifle the sob that wished to break forth once more as bile rolled in the back of her throat. She stepped past the graves as quickly as she could and forced herself to walk further. Many of the stones marked names of people she had known throughout her two hundred years: friends, family and some lovers, but soon the stones became more modern and Alice felt dread settle in her gut.

The next stones she came across nearly crippled her and she quickly turned her head to hide their names, but it was too late as they burned themselves behind her eyelids.

**Tony Stark  
Natasha Romanoff  
Bruce Banner  
Sam Wilson  
James Rhodes  
Thor Odinson  
Maria Hill  
Jodi Moore  
Monica Wilson  
Rebecca Barnes  
Charlotte Barnes  
Marie Barnes  
Clint Barton  
Laura Barton  
Nicholas Fury  
Steven Rogers**

As she was forced to look at each grave she felt her gut sink further and further until she was sluggishly and hopelessly wandering through the site. As she continued through the desolate scape she soon found herself climbing a hill and through blurred vision of her tears she could make out a final headstone that seemed to stand above the rest and she felt dread tighten in her breast, her hand clenching at it in an effort to afford some semblance of relief only to find none. With a broken sob she fell before the final stone, her bloodied hand pressing against it and defacing the almost beautiful memorial.

**James Buchanan Barnes**

With a sudden burst of agony and rage she lifted her head briefly to scream into the thundering heavens above. And as if to reply to her grief the dark clouds released and it began to rain.

Alice's body bowed with a sob as she crumbled before the stone, uncaring to the mud that began to cling to her skin in place of the ichor that had stained her hands mere moments before. With another agonizing cry she fisted her hands in her hair as if tugging the loose and clumping strands would offer some form of relief or distraction. She cried, her breast heaving over hiccupped breaths and her body trembling. She was so distracted she didn't hear the two distinct sets of footsteps that stopped behind her.

As she felt her shoulder grabbed, Alice reacted instantly, grabbing a knife that had appeared suddenly before her and burying the weapon to the hilt into the heart of the first offender and grabbing the second and throwing her weight on top of them with a roar. As her hands seized around the small throat of her second attacker, she felt horror unlike any she had ever known settle into her as if a tsunami crashing against the shore and she threw herself from the small body, her body scuttling back as far as she could until her back hit the front of Bucky's grave as if to stop her expeditious retreat. The bile built in the back of her throat could no longer be held as she released whatever had been in her stomach onto the dirt below her.

She took no shame in vomiting, her body heaving and sputtering as she reconciled the two faces staring up at her lifeless; horror contorting their features into silent screams – blood running from the boy's chest and the bruises formed from fingers around the girl's throat.

The boy's dark hair clung to his brow and slick with rain, donned in a baseball tee, jeans and sneakers as the last time she had seen him and his expression locked in surprise. The girl was smaller, younger; her braided pigtails falling limply on either side of her head and dressed in a coral and white striped tee, jeans and riding boots and the same she had been wearing the last day Alice had saw her; her expression locked in silent scream and terror.

Alice vomited once more as she immediately took in the bodies lying around her of the two children she held most dear:

**Cooper and Lila Barton**

" _ **Have you been the monster all along?"**_

Alice glanced up as the words met her ears, her arms encircling her waist and her body bowed over her knees, her brow marred with mud from where she had rested it to cool her fevered skin. Her eyes met gun-metal blue, a corporeal visage of the man she had always loved standing just beyond his own grave. His hair was longer and he was wearing a jacket, henley and jeans and it almost stirred a memory to her mind but he appeared as the last time she had seen him as the Winter Soldier, but also not. She stood suddenly, only to fall back on wobbly knees.

"Bucky…!"

He shook his head and turned from her, saying nothing as he began to walk away.

"Bucky…Bucky WAIT!"

Her cries fell on deaf ears as he continued his intended path.

Alice sobbed, collapsing back to her knees in the mud; cold and aching and feeling an odd sense of emptiness as he disappeared from her sight, but his expression remained burned in her mind's eye. It had been a look of disappointment, disgust and resentment and she felt whatever remained of her heart shatter.

* * *

**End of content warning.**

* * *

With Natasha's arm thrown over his shoulder and Steve and Thor trailing slowly behind him, Clint made his way back towards the jet with tightly furrowed brows.

The entire situation had been a trap that had debilitated the entire team and he had only been so lucky because the teenage girl had scuffed her boot ever so slightly and it had tipped him off. After locating the team and getting them all together he had herded them towards the exit. Steve and Thor seemed to be the only two that seemed capable enough to walk without aide, but upon finding Natasha shivering and seeming to have backed herself into the tightest corner she could find, he had taken it upon himself to make sure she made it out. He had nearly jumped when Tony's voice had echoed in his earpiece asking for a lullaby, the coms having been silent for most of the altercation. He had quickly drawn the conclusion that the twins had gotten to Bruce and Alice as well. He had tried to hail the jet many times in an effort to see if the mutant was okay, but he had received static as an answer.

Shifting Natasha's weight, he could see the jet in the distance and he ushered his teammates to move just a bit faster. Upon reaching the jet, Clint led the former spy to a seat before looking around – barely noticing when Thor and Steve found themselves in different parts of the cabin as if in a fog. Alice wasn't on board and a small trickle of dread settled in his gut. What if the Maximoffs had charmed Alice first – leaving her in a haze – before charming Bruce? Would the Hulk have recognized the mutant as a friend or foe? When he confirmed that the petite woman wasn't on board he made his way back down the gangway and glanced around the area.

"C'mon Kit, where are ya?"

Frowning he began working his way around the jet and keeping a watchful eye on the tree line in the event that the mutant had made for the woods for cover and to make sure he wasn't being watched. After a few moments of searching he nearly gave up before he noticed a hand just behind a rock just to the left of the jet and he jogged over to see Alice's body sprawled behind it as if she had been dropped limply in an effort to hide. He quickly kneeled down next to her, his fingers immediately moving the neck of her turtleneck out of the way as he felt for a pulse and sighing softly in relief when he found a fluttering beat beneath his fingertips and his relief turned into worry. Her breathing was uneven, ragged almost and her muscles would twitch every so often as if she were locked in a permanent flight or fight response and he rested his hand gently on her back before rocking her slowly.

"Al…Al, c'mon you gotta get up."

He ignored when the thrusters to Tony's suit seemed to land behind him, glancing briefly to see that he was carrying an unconscious Bruce.

" _Is she breathing?_ " Tony's voice echoed from behind his helm and Clint would have been annoyed with the question's wording if he hadn't noted the slight pitch of concern in the man's tenor. The archer looked up at him a nodded slowly.

"Yeah…the rest of the team was only dazed…but Alice and Bruce?"

" _Well I'm the reason Bruce is unconscious_ ," The billionaire admitted almost sheepishly, " _He somehow managed to get all the way to Johannesburg…whatever the witch showed him sent him immediately into early Hulk days._ "

"They were by themselves with no backup…even if we could've gotten out here it wouldn't have been quick enough to spare them this. The team was stunned…Bruce went haywire and she's completely unconscious." Clint shook his head before looking back down at the mutant to see that her muscles had stopped twitching and she remained terrifyingly still. "Alice…Al can you hear me?"

The archer was not prepared for the sudden and violent movement as Alice awoke from her own nightmare, her brows pulled tightly together and a wild look to her features before she nearly launched herself away from Clint with speed that the archer hadn't been prepared for. She scurried backwards away from him, her eyes wide and breath trembling between her lips and Clint was reminded of a time when Natasha had carried a haunted look not dissimilar and knew that whatever the mutant had been shown it had been horrifying. He raised his hands immediately, showing them to her even as she closed herself off to him and hugging herself as she shook like a leaf in a storm.

" _Hey, Wonderland, it's alright…it's us_."

Clint raised his hand to stop Tony from stepping closer when the mutant recoiled violently, a snarl seeming to curl at her lip. "Don't."

"Don't what?" The archer asked as he sat backwards and waving the billionaire to get Bruce situated on the plane as he attempted to talk her out of whatever state of mind she currently found herself in. "You don't want to be touched?" She gave an imperceptible nod, her body shuddering and drawing herself almost into a ball as if to make herself as small a target as possible. Clint placed his hands on his knees and nodded, "Alright, I understand."

Alice was feeling everything at once; her senses seemed to have been dialed up to twenty and she felt an overwhelming amount of sensations and feelings. She couldn't tell what was happening in her mind and what was happening in reality or the difference between the two. She felt an overpowering urge to flee, but her muscles felt weighed down by led and her heart pounded a painful rhythm against her breast. Darkness hedged at the edges of her vision as her sight funneled into a fixed point on the archer's hands and her lungs trembled against her ribcage as if unable to expand fully to feed her oxygen appropriately. She vaguely recognized the symptoms of her panic attack and belatedly she found herself surprised that the man in front of her had listened to her broken words instructing him not to touch – not realizing that she hadn't been able to fully get the words out in a way that was understood.

"Hey, c'mon Kit, I need you to breathe." Clint encouraged, mindful to not touch her as he loudly inhaled in an effort to get her focusing on the movement of his chest before exhaling. He watched as she struggled with the motion before coaching her through it again. "Count it, Al…1…2…3…4…5, in. Good, that's good…alright now out, 1…2…3…4…5." As he continued to coach her through the motions she soon calmed enough to be willing to listen to him, but she still refused any kind of contact. "We gotta go…you wanna go?" She had given another imperceptible nod and it took several minutes for him to coach her into standing. The entire situation was touch and go as he would reflexively reach when she nearly fell they would be forced to start all over.

After managing to corral the mutant into the jet, a look shared between himself and Tony in resignation, the two men managed to get the jet into the air; ignoring when Alice made no effort to engage with anyone in the cabin as she tucked herself as far away from anyone else and into the farthest corner she could. Clint frowned to himself as he flew, ignoring as Tony debriefed with Maria about their situation. He had experienced many of Natasha's panic and anxiety after choosing to recruit her from the Red Room instead of killing her as he had been ordered to do. He had brought her to his home with Laura and at the time Cooper had been a toddler, with Lila having not been born just yet, in hopes that being in a civilian setting would help her learn to be her own person. It had taken a lot of effort and even more patience, but eventually the young, redheaded Russian spy had begun to open up, realizing that it was okay to speak her mind without fear of retribution. And in much the same way that Natasha had been all those years ago he found Alice: hyper reactive, terrified, primal and running purely on instinct. It was clear that whatever was shown to the two women had been awful and had forced them into reverting to habits that acted to shield them from exterior assaults.

" _The news is_ _ **loving**_ _you guys. Nobody else is. There's been no official call for Banner's arrest, but it's in the air._ " Maria's voice echoed in the cabin and bringing Clint from his thoughts briefly as Tony sighed softly.

"Stark Relief Foundation?"

" _Already on the scene…How's the team?_ "

Tony briefly glanced around with furrowed brows, "Everyone's…we took a hit. We'll shake it off."

Maria sighed softly, " _Well for now I'd stay in stealth mode and stay away from here._ "

"So, run and hide?"

" _Until we can find Ultron…I don't have a lot else to offer._ "

"Neither do we…" Tony replied after a moment before disconnecting the call. He glanced around the cabin once more, taking in the defeated and broken faces around him. His eyes lingered on Natasha, Bruce and Alice just a bit longer than the rest. Three of the strongest people he knew were completely debilitated, their faces shadowed and haunted. The billionaire shook his head, unwilling to believe that they were beaten before making his way up to where Clint was steering the jet in silence. "Hey, you wanna switch out?"

"No, I'm good." The archer replied through a deep sigh that lifted his shoulders, "If you wanna get some kip, now's a good time…we're still a few hours out."

"A few hours out from where?"

"A safe house."

With the statement being said with a note of finality, Tony nodded before settling himself back into the seat he had just vacated, resting his head back against the interior of the jet and allowing himself a few moments of rest for the first time in nearly 48 hours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I'm not going to lie, this chapter was an absolute crap-shoot for me to write. There's a few things to note in this chapter so here we go:
> 
> I have to say first and foremost here, I adore Tony. He's one of my favorite characters in the MCU, but Age of Ultron is where we really see the set up for the way he acts for the remainder of the MCU timeline.
> 
> The jargon in this chapter actually had me stumped...a lot. I wanted to bring in information from outside in order to make the chapter seem more full so I relied on a deleted scene between Tony and Bruce/Nat and Rhodey (It's called "Watch your six" if you want to look it up). I'll be the first to say I know nothing about programming or hacking or how any of this technical stuff works, but I can only hope that it came across like I did lmfao!
> 
> Alice's nightmare was the hardest thing I've ever written. For those who did read it, I apologize so much...but it really was necessary to establish her core fears. Alice is a survivor of sexual abuse and so one of the main things she is afraid of is having her power stolen from her. She has stated many times throughout the story in small doses that she has killed without thought regardless of her targets age...this, unfortunately, includes children despite her love for them. This specific fear will play out throughout the remainder of the story and beyond. She is also afraid of outliving people and getting close to them and more than anything she's terrified that because of her actions after her experimentation and containment that she'll always revert to that base primal instinct when under stress again...hence the imagery of her killing Cooper and Lila Barton while they were seemingly trying to comfort her.
> 
> This scene was extremely difficult for me to write and I had to keep leaving it and coming back. In fact, I had been dreading writing the AOU timeline because I knew that if I did this story arch that this scene would need to be in here to some degree. My concern was how I was going to write a scene in which Alice has her power taken from her without getting explicit with the content (because let's be honest, content like that just doesn't sit well with me as a woman writing a female OC) and not for nothing...sometimes having it implied is so much more horrifying.
> 
> Again, this needed to happen in order for her to grow from here...and yes this will affect her reunion with Bucky to some degree. Regardless of this scene happening now or not, the fears are still there and Alice still would have had to overcome them before being able to have any kind of relationship with him. Point being...they are very different people than they were in the 1940s...but we'll get to see that planned out soon enough ;)
> 
> Also, Clint being the one to find her was very intentional.
> 
> I'm so excited to get to the next parts of this story because while AOU happens pretty quickly, we still have a few things to get through before we get Civil War content. I have a few filler chapters in which we actually get to go along with Wade and Alice while they take out a HYDRA facility as well as the tail end of the Deadpool timeline before we jump into Civil War. We're coming up much faster than you can believe on the long awaited reunion and GUYS, I've got sooooo SO much planned!
> 
> But enough of me rambling about story notes, haha!
> 
> If you haven't already please be sure to check out my dear friend **simmerandcry** 's lovely poly story "Show Me, Don't Tell Me" with her awesome OC Avery and our two favorite super soldiers ;) If you're looking for wholesome holiday content she also just released a small one-shot that you should check while you're on her page too! 
> 
> **Next chapter: The team recovers at the Barton Homestead and Alice gets a heart to heart from the last person she'd expect.**
> 
> Thank you all and I'll see you all next time :D
> 
> Eirlys xoxo


	26. The Edge

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for any spelling or grammar mistakes you may see throughout this story. I tried to catch what I could, but I'm only human and I'm positive I missed things, haha. Thanks again for sticking with me everyone!

_As the Sky May Fall_   
_Deadpool_ **/|\** _Age of Ultron_ _  
__26_

Alice spent the greater part of the flight within her own head.

Memories flashed before her eyes and she tried, desperately, to find some semblance of a memory that offered her some form of relief. No one spoke in the jet, each member of the team lost in reverie and in varying states. Steve sat facing the back of the cabin with his head in his hands; Bruce curled himself into a ball on the floor and leaned against the HUB with a blanket pulled around his shoulders; Thor stood with a hand on his hip and arm leaned above his head as he stared out of a window with a deep furrow to his brow; Natasha stared at nothing in particular, eyes wide and unblinking, and her body hunched in a way that seemed so unlike her.

Clint flew the jet through the night, his eyes surveying the open sky before him in the event they were attacked once more and Tony seemed to struggle between sleep and playing with his fingers. Every now and then the mutant would meet his eyes and turn away almost instantly and forcing the comforting smile he offered her from her mind. She was a wreck with her hair tugged from its ponytail and curtaining her face almost intentionally creating a barrier between her and the rest of the cabins occupants. She sat with her knees drawn up to her chest and her hands wringing together, the digits of her fingers nearly numb with how hard she clenched her hands together and consistently blinking tears from her eyes.

It had taken a lot of effort for her to realize that the gravestones she had seen in her vision were of the people sitting not ten feet from her, very much alive and very much breathing in varying degrees. Her breathing had not returned to normal and she felt herself hiccup without cause on certain breaths. Since they had taken flight she had had a total of three different panic attacks all of which she fought through silently and by herself.

Tony watched as the mutant rocked herself back and forth, every now and then he would catch breathy mutterings as if she was talking herself back from a ledge of some kind. Helplessness flowed through him with reckless abandon as he took in the defeated and demoralized faces of his team. He and Clint had been spared the nightmares that the rest of the team was suffering through, but he knew that if Clint hadn't been so quick to react to the teenager when he had that all of this would have very much landed in his lap. Tony was a lot of things, but he wasn't good with showing his friends he cared…at least not all the time. He thought back to the interactions he had had with the mutant since the party and he found himself remorseful. It wasn't the first time that he had regretted saying or doing something, in fact, Tony had many regrets throughout the years. Some were easier than others to deal with, but he had them.

Over the last year, he and the mutant had gotten on well enough. Sure, there were times where the two annoyed the other beyond measure, but at least she _listened_ when he spoke to her. He had tried telling Bruce about the Iron Man suits after the events of New York back in 2012, but the man had fallen asleep halfway through his story and then brushed off his frustrations about it by saying he wasn't _that kind of doctor_. He had expressed his vivid frustration (read: ranted, he ranted) at Alice while he had been designing the team's suit upgrades and she had been installing the software she had developed about how what he had put Pepper through and while he had always had PTSD it had never manifested into full blown panic or anxiety attacks. She had listened with rapt attention, nodding where appropriate and asking clarifying questions one of which had been " _why didn't you say that you were dealing with a homicidal maniac, I would've helped you_ "; he had swiftly deflected the question before continuing on simply stating that he _had it handled_. After he had finished his diatribe Alice had looked at him and suggested he speak to Sam stating that _he_ was _that kind_ of doctor.

He had laughed her off.

Sure he upgraded their suits to keep them safe, he made sure they weren't slammed consistently in the press; he had even created the Stark Relief Foundation in an effort to take some of the responsibility off of the team. But he was also very much aware that he could be better about expressing his care or concern for his team. He was supercilious, haughty and confrontational and he had been for much of his life as a defense mechanism at the harsh criticism and unrealistic expectations that his father had set for him and that, unfortunately, had been the basis for which he made friends. The only people in his innermost circle who knew that was Pepper, Happy and Rhodey who had forced their way past his prickly exterior and realizing that it was a very clever mask he wore…Natasha and Alice had come very close to realizing that as well if they hadn't figured it out already since both women had willingly spent the most time with him – Alice more so Natasha, but that was because the mutant seemed to crave someone with the same intellectual prowess as herself.

When Fury had pulled him on as a consultant – Tony was _still_ insulted that he was deemed unworthy of working on a team – for the Avengers Initiative, the engineer felt it important that he oversee the team to a degree. And so, Tony became self-appointed head of Public Relations, their engineer and main source of funding (he didn't mind the dollar amount and never had), and their emergency Government liaison. He would never admit that he did most of this in order to have some semblance of control and that he wanted desperately to prove that if _anything_ was to be his legacy, this couldn't be _that bad_ ; but he did it because he knew he was the only one who could. Could Steve easily handle the Government? Yes. But Tony didn't feel comfortable leaving that kind of responsibility in the hands of a man who was only twenty five years old when he went into the ice…and a small part of him also just wanted to spite his father even after all this time. Could any one of the team do what he did as far as PR and the Government was concerned? Yes, they could, but so far four of them were in no place to want to deal with the Government whether through personal means (such as Bruce and Clint) or because they told the Government to piss off (Natasha and Steve – the patriot in a much more diplomatic way); one was an alien in every sense of the word and heir to a throne on a different planet and the other was a mutant who would probably force the Government onto its collective head without trying to just on her age alone. No, Tony had thought, it has to be _me_.

But as he looked around at the people he considered friends, he began to question if he was even worthy of their friendship. He was acerbic and surly and now he had created a murder bot that was hell-bent on making his worst nightmares come to life and making the vision he had received more of a reality. His eyes met the mutant's form as her spine straightened and her breathing hitched, belatedly realizing that she was struggling through another panic attack before he realized what had potentially triggered it as Steve's leg shifted. She looked so small leaned against the side of the cabin, her breathing erratic and her eyes clenching shut as she gripped her arms so tightly he was sure it would leave bruises from where she had them wrapped around her knees. He wanted more than anything to apologize for the way he acted, but also knew that the mutant was in no place to accept it and he needed an acceptance more than anything.

The jet shifted in the sky as they were beginning to make a decent. The time difference from South Africa to where Clint was taking them showed a bright and clear dawning sky; the clouds were painted in hues of gold as the sun chased away the purples and blues of the night and giving way to what was apparently going to be a beautiful day. The team shifted variously as the archer began the landing sequence. Rolling fields a luscious green greeted them as well as a few trees dotted along the landscape, where Clint brought the jet down in between, before a forest stretched beyond a wooden fence and barn where two horses were seen grazing.

"We're here?"

Clint glanced at Tony and nodded his head before glancing around at the team. Steve, Bruce and Thor, while seemingly still troubled, were coherent enough to walk themselves and merely appeared deep in thought and confusion as they took in the landscape beyond the cockpit windows; Natasha seemed to be coming out of whatever nightmare she had been forced to see, but didn't seem willing to move as her eyes were glazed and unfocused still – her gaze locked in a thousand yard stare and finally his eyes locked on Alice who seemed to be coming out of another panic attack, if her trembling muscles were anything to go by as she tried to keep tension in her limbs when it was clear all she wanted to do was fall limp. Natasha, he knew he could at least touch and guide, Alice would want no part if her body language hadn't made that clear enough especially when Steve had ambled too close to her.

"Alice?"

Clint shook his head, "She's been completely mute the last few hours aside from some mumbling…best to leave her alone, Steve."

"But…" the patriot looked torn between fighting Clint on the observation and simply letting it go as his body seemed to slump. "I can't leave her like this."

Clint noticed the distinct lack of " _we_ "in that statement, but knew where he was coming from as Alice and Steve were incredibly close and he knew it was from a place of concern. The archer sighed deeply through his nose, "I'll leave the hatch open. She doesn't want to be touched. I don't know what kind of shit she was shown, but she's hyper-reactive and I'd rather not send her into a spiral she can't or _won't_ come back from."

A defeated look crossed the blonde's features before he nodded his consent and turned to head off the gangway though not before casting a sad and nearly tortured look at the mutant as she stared at their feet. Clint took Natasha's arm and guided her from the jet his eyes set on his home where he knew he'd find his wife and kids inside…he only hoped that Laura wouldn't mind the tagalongs. Tossing a glance back over his shoulder he found Alice slowly making her way down the gangway, her steps hesitant and her distance mindful from the rest of the group. She briefly met his eyes before her gaze snapped back towards the ground and her arms immediately encircled herself. It then was clear to Clint what she had seen or at the very least been put through and he felt anger ignite in his veins for the mutant.

The archer knew very well what had happened to Alice back in the 80's. Fury had originally put Clint on the mission to find Alice when he had joined S.H.I.E.L.D, hoping that the archer could recruit the mutant much like he had recruited Natasha, but he had been recalled to watch the site of the Tesseract before Loki had appeared. It was a time he preferred to not think about, but he had read her three inch thick file that had detailed what had transpired over twenty years of captivity as well as what had occurred after. S.H.I.E.L.D had been monitoring her as a potential threat due to her relatively unstable mind and the destruction she could cause if angered enough. Everyone on the team was a killer in some fashion be it by their own choices, the orders of others or unintentionally…none of them were clean of the blood of those who had died by their hands. He shook his head as he led the group closer to his home, ignoring the questioning glances at his back as he continued to brace Natasha's weight.

"What is this place?" Thor questioned as he looked around at the farm.

Tony shrugged his shoulders as he fell back to meet the Asgardian's pace, "A safe house?"

"Let's hope," Clint murmured as he pushed open the door to the farmhouse that he and Laura shared with his two children…soon to be three. "Honey, I'm home!"

Laura dropped her children's art books onto the counter, circling the island and appearing in the living room with her hair down and brows furrowed. Her swollen stomach was visible as the fabric of her blouse cascaded and showed that she was quite far along in her pregnancy and she smiled suddenly as she realized who stood in front of her.

"Hi…company." The archer murmured sheepishly as he stepped further into the room and towards his wife, "Sorry I didn't call ahead."

She shook her head with a smile, "Hey." It was all the permission Clint needed as he leaned down to kiss his wife after pulling her into a tight embrace despite the baby bump she sported.

"This is an agent of some kind," Tony murmured to Thor, his eyes meeting Clint's as the archer smiled widely before gesturing to his wife.

"Gentlemen, this is Laura."

She giggled, clearly star struck as she gazed at the team with a breath of awkwardness, "I know all your names."

Before the team could answer, feet on the steps echoed throughout the foyer and Clint left his wife's embrace with a sly smirk, "Ooh, incoming!" Two children raced to him with multiple cries of _dad_ or _daddy_ before he encircled his son in a hug and picked up his daughter so she rested on his hip. "I see her! Hey, buddy! How're you guys doing!?"

"These are…smaller agents."

"Look at your face! Oh, my goodness!" The archer cried as he peppered kisses on his daughter's cheek and allowing her to slide to the ground where she looked up at the man with wide eyes and palpable enthusiasm.

"Did you bring Auntie Nat and Auntie Allie!?"

Natasha, who had been trapped within the fog of her mind, smiled suddenly as she met the little girl's eyes and opening her arms, "Why don't you hug her and find out?"

Lila grinned widely as she allowed herself to get scooped up by the former agent. Steve shuffled awkwardly before glancing at Clint's wife with a bashful smile, "Sorry for barging in on you."

"Yeah, we would have called ahead, but we were busy having no idea that you existed."

"Yeah," Clint smiled as he tossed an arm around his wife and pulling both her and Cooper into his sides, "well Fury helped me set this up when I joined. He kept it off S.H.I.E.L.D's files…I'd like to keep it that way. I figure it's a good place to lay low."

As the team shifted awkwardly, Lila took in each face of the heroes gathered before she scowled at the notice of one person missing, "Daddy? Where's Auntie Allie?"

Clint looked up from speaking to his son to glance around the room, noting that the mutant had not followed the team into the house. He sighed softly as his mind turned with possibilities before smiling down at his daughter, "I'm sure she's checking to make sure everything is safe, Lila…she'll be in soon."

The little girl didn't look convinced, but accepted her father's statement as she accepted another hug from him with a smile. Thor fidgeted for another moment before stalking from the house and drawing the room's eyes to him. Steve trotted after him with a tight furrow between his brows.

"Thor…?"

"I saw something in that dream. I need answers," He almost looked apologetic as he looked towards the patriot – the two having formed an easy friendship over the last few years as they both tended to feel out of place. "I won't find them here." With a swing of his hammer he was gone, leaving Steve with the echoes of Peggy's voice in his mind.

" _We can go home…_ "

He stared back in the doorway, noticing the way Clint and Laura orbited around one another and how his kids seemed excited to have their father home and he scoffed quietly before stalking away. Maybe he should find Alice…maybe she would have advice for him.

" _We can go home…_ "

**-0-**

Hours later found the mutant sitting in the same hiding spot she had found earlier that morning; having taken refuge in the barn. She had not dared to enter the Barton's home and it became worse when she could hear Cooper and Lila asking about her, asking _for_ her. Their dead expressions locked in terror flashed before her eyes once more and Alice had turned on her heel and made for the barn – just missing Thor and Steve as she slid beyond the door.

Alice frowned from her hay bale perch that spilled from the back of the barn and onto an alcove of the upper platform. She had actually helped Laura order the hay a few months ago and get her set up before spending her time in New York. She had told the woman that ordering more than she thought she'd need wouldn't be bad and that she would go through the hay quick enough with the winter closing in. It had been shortly after the Bartons had stayed with her in Virginia that the mutant had arranged to have the horses that Cooper and Lila had learned to ride on sent to the Barton Homestead so that the children could learn to truly take care of them. Alice had secretly hacked into the family's bank account and deposited a hefty sum to care for the large animals.

Now that decision had paid off fully as she used the dried straw to hide herself within the upper half of the barn.

She didn't know how long she sat for, playing with the knife in her hands with her elbows balancing on her knees as she played the dream over in her mind. She was exhausted after the string of panic attacks that had occurred since South Africa. Her muscles felt sore, her back tight with the constant twitching of her nerves, but her mind was alight with thoughts so quick that the mutant was unable to decipher them fast enough before the next thought barreled through her conscious. She had heard Steve and Clint calling her name earlier – clearly noticing that she was missing, but she didn't care…they would not find her here.

Her mind began to circle back along the edges of the nightmare, her mind still trying to process the fears she had being forced to surface so suddenly. Alice had always been a deserter in regards of her own fears and insecurity – always running away from them and never confronting them head on. If she had been braver she would have crossed the threshold of the Barton home, but instead she had ran to the first form of cover she could find. She had glanced at the horses briefly; Silvy and Hummer grazing lazily on the fresh green grass, barely a trace of snow to be found and considered spiriting one away to race along the large acreage that Clint had amassed for his family's homestead, but ultimately decided against it. They would know how to find her that way.

Without warning her mind conjured her nightmare before her eyes. Of everything she had been shown, only a few things had genuinely disturbed her and nothing so much so like the very beginning and end of what she had been forced to see. She had lived through much in her life, sexual assault aside, but every time she pictured Bucky's face she couldn't help the way her stomach clenched or the bile that built up in the back of her throat that she stubbornly pushed down. Her sexual abuse from the lab she could stomach…within reason…she shuddered at the feeling of hands and lips long-gone seemed to ghost over her skin and she shook her head violently to dispel the thought. The one thing she couldn't stomach was Bucky's face in place of the doctors and scientists that had abused her for so long. She could feel her vision begin to tunnel once more and she forced herself to breathe, ignoring the way her pulse rocketed against the side of her throat almost as if her heart was trying to crawl its way up into her mouth. _Perhaps it should_ , she thought with a snarl of self-deprecation, _maybe if I didn't have it, none of this would hurt so much_.

She knew she was only lying to herself.

" _Find things to ground you_ ," Sam had advised her one evening after she had spiraled into another panic attack.

It had been a bad day for her as a series of triggers had piled up until everything had exploded all at once. She recalled that Steve had been away with the team on a mission and Alice had feigned exhaustion to avoid being asked to do anything with the search for Loki's scepter. She had recognized too late in the day that she had been steadily ignoring the warning signs of her incoming attack. That morning she had went to grab a pot only for it to come crashing out of the cabinet along with others, the sounds ringing in her ears. She had passed it off as nothing. She had Bruce had been the lab when the doctor had knocked into a tray of needles leaving it askew on his counter and Alice passed it off as an oddity and nothing more. She had gone down to the first floor to grab her delivery order and sign the receipt when she had gotten a chill from the lobby doors constantly opening and closing as people had come and gone. On her way back up to her apartment, the light in the elevator flickered and reminded her how small the space was, she shook it off and had stepped out of the elevator to her floor. The final straw had been when Sam had accidentally bumped into her and sent the two of them careening into the side of the kitchenette, Sam catching the both of them as a reaction and nearly landing on top of her, his hand resting on the counter and tugging her right arm exactly where her experimentation number had been burned into the underside of her arm. It had sent her spiraling and the former Pararescuer had quickly and effectively brought her out of her panic like a musician playing a piece they memorized long ago.

" _Remind yourself of things that appeal your senses. Panic disrupts your natural sense, so name three things you can touch, three things you can smell, three things you can hear and three things that you can see. It sounds silly, but I promise you that it'll help._ " He had smiled at her then, " _C'mon, name 'em._ "

" _Um…I can feel the rug, the tiles_ …" She winced as her mind immediately flashed back to the lab and Sam's voice echoed around her once more.

" _Nope…we don't have real tiles in the kitchen. Try again_ ," He hedged carefully, his voice soft. " _C'mon girl, I know you can name something else._ "

" _Okay,_ " She had breathed shakily as she tried again, her hand clenching her pants, " _the rug, my pants…and the cabinet._ "

" _Good,_ " Sam had praised with a wide smile, " _keep going._ "

" _I can hear the TV, car horns and Rumsfeld barking_ …" She listed and feeling her heartrate slowing, " _I see you, the coat rack – it's crooked, Steve'll be mad – and my socks…I smell the candle, um…the tomato sauce and coffee._ "

Sam had guffawed loudly when she had mentioned the crooked coat rack, knowing she was right. " _See there you go…you're in your apartment and you're okay…though you may have to change your shirt – it's covered in tomato sauce._ "

She had snorted, feeling better but exhausted, " _In another life, Sam, you'd have made a very good life partner._ "

He snickered before watching as she pushed herself up off of the floor, " _I don't think it'd have worked out between us, Pidge._ " He mocked mournfully and earning a snorted laugh from the mutant,

" _I'll remember that, Hunk._ " He had laughed heartily at the Voltron reference before the two managed to clean up the kitchen.

Alice forced herself to replay the memory over and over and wishing that she had Sam's voice coaching her trough this mess. He had become a stalwart friend and never once did he judge her for being the way that she was or what she had turned into after the events in Washington. While she loved Steve's friendship he tended to forget that she was human; he had seen the way she had been early on in their friendship and wondered if he had ever made room in his head for how she had turned out after what had happened in D.C.

 _Evidently not_ , she snorted to herself as she twisted the blade in between her fingers, her eyes tracking the movement and tracing the sharp edge. She didn't miss the pitying glances, the suspicious looks or the whispered conversations he had with Sam and Natasha when he thought she wasn't listening. He tended to treat her as if she were a porcelain doll or as if she was completely bulletproof in a whiplash that would leave her confused and on uneven terrain with him.

 _Eggshells_ , she walked on _eggshells_ around him.

Steve was still a wildcard in her surprising deck of cards. During the 40's they had barely been acquaintances, brought together by the sheer stubbornness of Bucky. The sharpshooter – at the time – had been wildly optimistic. Sure they had gotten along for three years, but she had noticed a shift in the patriot that sat ill at ease within her breast after the events in D.C. Had he realized how fragile she really was? Was it that he got to see how dark the shadows that stretched behind her truly were? Or was he guilty that he had somehow failed her in Bucky's stead? She didn't bother to know the answer, only caring for preparing herself for what should happen should they find the former soldier once more.

She was presented with a choice – one that was not ideal. She knew she would be forced to choose between Bucky and between the people that she had surrounded herself with for three years and she knew deep in her heart what her choice would be even if it ruined her to her core. Even if he rejected her like the vision had shown, she would choose Bucky each and every time. She was not a woman who fell to fragility and whimsy for a man – her worth wasn't based off of her choice of partner, but given the circumstances Alice knew that she couldn't rightfully choose the team.

The road ahead had not been kind to either of them and she wanted so desperately for that road to be kind. He was an assassin, a murderer and enemy according to the eyes of the law – they wouldn't care that he had no say or that nothing was of his own volition. Brainwashing never held up in a court case, she _knew_ that. If she chose Bucky, she would be throwing away her entire relationship with the team, the law, and they would spend the remainder of their days on the run and Alice desperately wished to not have to run anymore, but she would push her discomfort aside if it meant that Bucky would be safe.

The flash of tombstones from the vision met her eyes and she found herself clenching her teeth so tightly her jaw hurt.

Was she the monster all along? Charles had told her that each child she had attempted to bear had already been dead…but wouldn't that mean she had siphoned their life before they ever had a chance? Was she a creature that merely leeched life from others? Would Bucky want to be with someone who stole life from unborn children?

She recalled a time where he had mentioned wanting a family: " _A boy and a girl!_ " He had cried enthusiastically with a grin that lit the entirety of his handsome face and chased away the darkness of war. " _We'll get a cute little house and raise 'em together. We'll get a dog named Lefty – from the Dodgers of course – hell, maybe a cat too! We'll live outside the city where we can see the mountains._ "

" _Tell me more,_ " She had laughed as she snuggled under his arm, her arms encircling his waist. " _Tell me about our future, Handsome_."

" _Maybe somewhere a little further out than Westchester…maybe somewhere upstate! Like the Catskills or the Whitefaces! Think about it, Alley Cat, it'll be perfect. A little plot o' land…maybe two acers or so…why're you laughing?_ "

" _You're absolutely adorable…_ "

" _Nah, Doll…I'm rugged, charismatic, and cool as a cucumber!_ "

" _You're a charlatan…but you're my charlatan._ "

He had thrown his head back and laughed before leaning down to capture her lips with his.

She winced as Lila and Cooper's faces flashed before her eyes, her eyes screwing shut as she tugged at her hair in an effort to get the visions to stop. _A boy and a girl_ …Cooper and Lila…she shook her head violently before slamming her hand into the barn siding and wincing as pain radiated up the side of her hand and into her wrist. She hadn't broken the bones, but the hit had distracted her long enough to pull herself from the memory before talking herself down once more.

"You can feel pain, you can see the inside of the barn, you can hear wood being chopped, you can smell hay." She chanted like a mantra. Sure, Sam had told her three things to notice, but she was trying. She was brought from her reverie as a cough sounded below her. No, not a cough, but the clearing of someone's throat and she felt anxiety suddenly pool in her gut as she realized her hiding spot had been found.

"You gonna come down here?" The accent was distinctly New Yorker and she worried for a moment that it was Steve, quickly realizing that it wasn't the patriot as an annoyed huff came from the speaker, "Or are you gonna make this old man climb up there?"

Alice left the comfort of her hiding spot to glance over the lip of the upper floor she had been perched on and frowned when she noticed Nick Fury below. He was dressed casually, wearing a grey sweater that buttoned up beneath his usual black trench coat, the fabric skirting around his dark pants which he tucked into his boots. A black beanie covered his head and his eyepatch remained as it always had and he looked well considering the last time she had seen him. In a moment of stubbornness she rolled her eyes at him before disappearing from view. Fury sighed through his nose before climbing the hay bales up to the area she had disappeared to and upon reaching the platform noticed that the woman was playing with her knife once more.

"You plan on usin' that?" He questioned with a quirked brow, his hands resting on his knees as he sat. He had briefly run into Clint who had informed him of the mutant's situation and the former director was reminded of the early 90's when he had found her in a dilapidated building in San Francisco. She eyed him briefly, her gaze cut in a sharp glare and her hair curtaining most of her expression from view, but he didn't miss the scowl that tugged at her lips.

"Are you a part of my imagination too?"

He paused. He had thought he would have to coax her into a conversation, but her words had been both sad and callous almost as if she had carved them from the depths of the darkest hole in the coldest climate. Fury watched as Alice played with the knife; twisting it from hilt to blade's edge and repeating the motions once more – it was a dagger, military issued, and one he recognized as one the Winter Soldier had once carried. Where she had gotten it he didn't know, but she refused to meet his eyes, the blade's tip pressing into her fingertips, but never deep enough to draw blood and he quickly realized that Alice was using it to tell the difference between what was in her head to what was real.

"It's funny," She nearly whispered as she pressed the knife's tip into the pad of her finger and relishing the small pinch that seemed to bring her back further from the edge of her madness, "I came up here hoping that I could tell the difference between this and what's happening up here." She removed the knife tip from her finger and used it to point at her temple in a gesture to indicate she was speaking about her mind, her lips quirking though her expression remained stoic and withdrawn – her eyes cast in a thousand yard stare that sent a chill up Fury's spine. The mutant continued though, a dry laugh passing her lips, "I don't really think there's a difference anymore."

"Why do you say that?"

She met his stare, though he noticed that she didn't actually meet his eyes as her gaze settled on his nose, "My life… _pfft_ ," She laughed without humor, the sound hollow and biting, " _my_ life is enough to make Shakespeare himself _weep_ or perhaps Poe…I suppose it depends on who you wish to base your definition of _tragedy_ upon. Killed by being brutalized and cursed to a life that has offered nothing but pain and suffering…forced to live with blood on my hands from all of those who have crossed my path and for what? Lines blur, you know, between this reality and the next always twisting and always turning and blurring they continue." She shrugged half-heartedly, "I've learned in my long life, Fury, that it's hard enough to live in a world where you don't belong, but knowing it and understanding the conflicting realities between my world and yours…it's _maddening_."

"My world and your world are the same, Alexander."

"Yes, I might've thought you'd say so," She shorted, her knife pressing into the tips of her fingers once more. "How can your world and mine be the same? Your world rejects me down to my very DNA and my world has a hard time accepting those of us who were cursed with mutations that are so out of the ordinary that there's very little acceptance. We are _used_ for what our DNA codes and what doors that genetic code can open. We are killed, distorted, tortured and _raped_ because there are those in this world that believe that we are merely elements to their own success." She growled lowly to herself, " _There are few people whom I really love, and still fewer of whom I think well. The more I see of the world, the more am I dissatisfied with it; and every day confirms my belief of the inconsistency of all human characters, and of the little dependence that can be placed on the appearance of merit or sense_."

"Using quotes now?"

"Jane Austen," Alice replied, though her voice lacked any real emotion behind it. "She is not entirely wrong I should think."

Fury's brows pinched together as he stared at her. Last he had spoken to her she had been determined – injured and slightly defeated, yes, but at least she had a fire within her eyes. Now as he stared at her he could tell that whatever she had seen had sapped whatever strength she had been hanging on to; whatever hope that had once burned brightly in her had been kicked to embers and he found himself genuinely worrying about the woman.

"Why do you think that? I remember leaving a woman who had some gusto in that cemetery, not a woman who has her head in her ass."

Alice's eyes met his for the first time, the hazel swirling with cinnamon and Fury nearly smirked. Tough love was sometimes the best way to get through to the mutant and something he had realized a long time ago. She leveled him with a sharp glare before turning her attention back to twirling the dagger in her hands and hearing the clear challenge in his voice, she allowed herself to consider his words. She had no real emotional reaction to the words, just mild annoyance and she knew had she been in another frame of mind she probably would have rebuked his statement – all she felt was exhaustion.

"Are you ready to give up just because that kid got in your head?"

"You don't know what she showed me…"

Fury narrowed his eyes at her, "Then tell me."

Alice's jaw worked as she contemplated where to start before wincing as the images of her nightmare flashed before her eyes once more: domestic life with Bucky before he had become possessive and forceful; the lab where she had been tortured and sexually abused over and over for so long; the blood on her hands from the countless lives she had taken because of her blind rage; the children…she shook her head suddenly, the knife's edge biting into the skin of her hand from where she had clenched her fist. Fury watched as the emotions played across her face, the blood from where she held the knife hitting the floor beneath her, but it seemed as if the pain was doing little to stop her mind from spiraling.

"C'mon, Alexander, what did you see?"

She broke. The words tumbled passed her lips faster than she realized and as she spoke the visions became blurred and she realized disjointedly that she was having another panic attack, but the man across from her merely listened. He offered no advice, no calming words and no encouragement to ease her panic as her breathing accelerated and her heart beat against her chest once more as if attempting to break from the prison of her ribs – her mouth running dry and bile building once more as her stomach flipped. Nick Fury just watched. As she spoke about killing Lila and Cooper in her vision she sobbed, dropping the knife from her hand and clenching her hair at her scalp in a fist.

Fury moved.

She nearly jumped when she felt hands encircling both of her wrists and a pitched sob, almost like a whining whistle, screeched past her lips as she begged to be released. She tugged her arms weakly, quickly losing strength and soon she found herself sitting, her hands still tangled within her sweat-soaked tresses and her wrists trapped in the stern, but gentle hold of Nick Fury. He spoke then, encouraging her to open her eyes and look at him. Alice shook her head, her chest heaving and begging for breath.

Why did it hurt so much? Why couldn't she satisfy her need for air? Why did she feel like she was standing on the unsteady rocks of a cliff and so close to falling?

"Breathe, Alexander…breathe."

"I-I can't!" She stuttered out from her clenched jaw.

"Let go."

Alice shook her head wildly, her hands tugging harder against her hair and while her scalp stung she found she didn't care. "No…n-no please…don't take me back!"

"Alice you need to look at me," Fury's voice was sharp. It was not soft nor was it gentle – it was like a sudden crack of lightning across a dark sky which gave way to concern, but he did not coach her like Sam would and he did not coddle her. "Open your eyes and _look_."

Almost without her permission her eyes opened to see that he was not standing over her as she had thought, his eye was crinkled at the edges that showed his concern and his worry, but there was very little pity there and there was no sympathy. He held her wrists gentle enough to not be constricting, but with enough strength that promised he would do what he felt necessary to prevent her from injuring herself. She found herself studying his face as if seeing it for the first time and slowly her hands began to release her now tangled hair, Fury guiding her hands away from them and loosening his grip on her wrists and taking her hands instead in a rare show of kindness.

"I'm not here to hurt you…and I'm _definitely_ not here to coddle you and tell you little lies that'll make everything better," He spoke after she slumped bonelessly into the square of hay that she had been leaning on, her chest still heaving with the need for oxygen and tears streaking clean patterns against her dirt-smudged face. He didn't try to wipe her tears for her, only held her hands to remind her that she was here and present and not trapped within her mind. "Is this why you've hidden from those kids? The only two kids in the entire world that you love more than yourself…more than Barnes…they're down there wonderin' where you are." His voice seemed to rumble like a deep purr in his chest as her eyes finally met his once more; ochre swimming behind her eyes and her jaw loose and unclenched. "You proved me wrong all those years ago…do _you_ believe you would intentionally hurt them?"

She stared at him for a few moments before shaking her head slowly, her lips trembling and her pulse beating visibly against the column of her throat.

"Do you really think you're capable of becoming what you swore you'd never become again?"

She hesitated and Fury sighed softly through his nose. It was a few moments before she choked on a sob, shaking her head once more.

"You told me, back in the 90's that you were done being what everyone expected you to be…what everyone was afraid you'd become. You said you'd be better and you said that you'd use that anger inside of you to protect." Fury reminded her, his voice while blunt was gentle, "You aren't capable of being a monster Alexander…you never were. It wasn't meant for you. Yes, the world handed you a nasty set of cards to play with at a table where others were given stacked hands against you, but that never stopped you. It never held you back and it never stopped you from doing what's right. You fought wars that you never needed to be a part of because you couldn't let others suffer. You are Elizabeth Alessandra Alexander, or am I speaking to the wrong relic from the past?"

"I hate that name."

Fury's lips quirked into an amused smirk at her snorted disgruntlement at the name, "You know, you remind me of someone I knew not so long ago."

"What was their name?"

He considered her for a few moments before sighing softly, "Carol Danvers. She's the reason I created the Avengers, you know. She was stubborn, clever, level-headed…everything we needed, but she left."

"Left?"

"More like, she had a prior engagement across the galaxy," Fury chuckled before glancing back at her to see that Alice was studying him critically as if weighing his truthfulness. He shook his head before continuing, "She was different…hell of a super too. When I met her she had no memory, but she was determined to be herself no matter what that would cost." He squeezed her hands more firmly, "I'm telling you this because it's important. Don't you think for a second that you don't have people in your corner that would never let you go there again and that includes me."

Alice searched the man's eyes for a moment. This was the same man who had once said he planned on using the Tesseract to create weapons to combat those who were different, those who didn't match up in the world. The same man who had then worked on Project Insight that would deal with people without due process; the same man who had once watched her suffer and ultimately the same man who had set her free. She was aware that Nick Fury had been on the wrong side of things in the past, but of everyone she knew he was the one who proved time and time again that he only held the best interests of people at heart. Nick Fury, though flawed, was a _good_ man.

He was also the only man who knew of her one-man mission to take down HYDRA.

He glanced at her briefly before looking down at the knife that sat between them and he snorted, "Souvenir for your boyfriend?"

"Other than his necklace, it's all I have." She paused as she forced herself to swallow, fear filtering behind the haunted look of her eyes as she stared up at the former director, "Nick…do you…do you think I'm a monster?"

"No," he answered immediately, his gaze holding her steadily. "I think you're a survivor. You've done what you had to in the past…no one's hands are clean from blood of innocents, Alexander, myself included. We make mistakes and sometimes we even follow bad orders." He watched as she snorted softly, blinking away tears and sighing to herself before he continued, "That kid showed you your deepest fears…now it's time to face those fears and deal with them before they consume you and they _will_ if you let them. You have always been a good person, a good person who wasn't given a lot of choices…it's time you understood that. Take time to conquer those fears and you better go give those kids some love."

It took her a few moments to answer, her heart steadying in her chest and yet she could feel it swell as his acceptance pierced through the crippling self-doubt and madness that had been steadily developing over the last few hours of her stewing within her own mind. She found herself genuinely surprised and appreciative all at once that it had been Nick Fury to break through her walls when it seemed that no one else had – not that the team had actually had time to check on her considering they had all taken a hit not dissimilar and she didn't fault them for it.

"Okay…"

"Okay," Fury seemed to smile as he sat back and releasing his hold of her one hand and eyeing her, "I'm not letting go until you get down from here. I'm not giving you the chance to back out now."

Alice allowed Fury to direct her to the barn doors and just before she stepped out from the shaded interior she glanced back at him and offering him a weak smile. "Thanks…I…I think I'll be okay."

"You ever need a boot in your ass, you give me a call…I'll set you straight." He nodded and felt a small prickle of pride swell in his chest when her smile widened fractionally.

It would take time, but he knew that she would be okay and he knew she would need to be. He knew her plans to take out HYDRA, he also knew that she needed to have herself put together for when she was to run into the Winter Soldier once more… _Bucky_ , his mind corrected him and he tucked his hands into his pockets. That man would have enough baggage by himself alone and he knew that Alice would have needed to hang hers up before she could effectively help him. Two broken pieces did not make a whole and Fury wanted her to have her happy ending, just like she deserved. Like Alice had been working on taking out HYDRA, so had he – though his methods were more old fashioned he at least took out the heads that she wouldn't know about all while slowly rebuilding S.H.I.E.L.D from the ashes left in Washington. He knew that with time the mutant would be okay and that was all he could hope for as she cast him one last long look before stepping out into the light of the mid-morning sun.

Alice shielded her face for a brief moment, allowing her eyes to steadily adjust to the light. Taking a deep breath the mutant purposely forced the images she had seen to the back of her mind, deciding to deal with the vision later on. She could see Tony and Steve just outside of Clint and Laura's home, both with axes in hand and splitting wood; Clint stood on the porch with Cooper sandwiched between his torso and the railing that the archer had started around the porch, but had never finished with Lila sitting in the rocking chair behind the two with a rung in her hands and cleaning each one as it was finished being sanded – the three working together. Alice didn't see Natasha, Bruce or Thor, but assumed that maybe they lay beyond the interior of the house and with a deep breath she pushed herself to make the trek into the view of her teammates.

"Auntie Allie!"

The call had been her only warning and she turned just in time to see Clint and Laura's youngest racing towards her with her yellow sweatshirt unzipped and her denim dress swishing about her legs, her pigtails mere streaks behind her as she approached. Alice opened her arms and dropped to a knee on reflex and caught the girl as she slammed into her body, forcing Alice to immediately scoop her up into her arms or risk falling backwards. Lila kissed her cheek with a wet smack and Alice immediately pushed her dead eyes to the back of her mind as she looked down at the girl in her arms.

"Hey Tater Tot," She answered the young girl with a quick kiss pressed against her cheek, glancing briefly to see that eyes were now on her and she ignored them as Cooper finally managed to drop what he was doing and raced towards her as well, his arms outstretched and forcing the mutant to shift his sister in her arms to her hip so she could welcome the secondary hug. "Hey Sport."

"Daddy said you were making sure we were safe!" Lila cried enthusiastically as she hung from the mutant's neck, "Did you run into any monsters?"

Alice blinked at the girl before offering her a weak smile, "Quite a few, actually…but you're safe. I promise."

"I knew you'd come back!" Cooper grinned up at her and she smiled, ruffling his hair and observing his red flannel over his yellow t-shirt and knowing that the young man was quickly coming into his own and she had to shake her thoughts away.

"I always will kiddo," she answered with a note of finality, "no matter what happens. That's a promise."

"Good because Laura was about to send out a search party!" Alice looked up just in time to see Clint stepping towards her, his steps measured and careful as he did. There was a hesitance to his stance, his eyes asking her if she was comfortable with his approach and she nodded subtly and allowing him to stop just before her. "You good?"

"I will be…just…shaken up a bit." She forced the answer with a weak smile, "A few monsters I had to kick back into their cages. I'll make sure they're taken care of later…but a little birdie told me I was disappointing two of my favorite people in the entire world by staying away for so long."

Cooper smiled up at her, "You missed breakfast, but mom put some on the side for you."

"Thanks Sport." She then glanced at the two kids and smiled at the both of them before setting Lila back on the ground and giving them both a swift kiss, "Why don't you let your mom know I'm here and let her know I'll be in in a second?"

"Sure!"

Both children raced away and the emptiness that had filled her heart hours ago seemed to fill back in, the darkness scattering to the back of her mind and settling the madness that had taken root. She glanced back at Clint to see that he had changed from his gear and was sporting more casual wear that she recognized was his work clothes. He had his hands tucked into his pockets and slowly removed them so that they were within view and she sighed softly, her eyes clenching briefly before she heard him clearing his throat.

"We were worried…went lookin' for you too."

She offered him a weak smile, "I know…I think I heard at some point, but…" glancing away from him, her eyes found the form of the two horses she had gifted his children and sighed deeply through her nose, her arms encircling herself slightly. "She really got me, Clint… _really_ got me and I don't want to feel that powerless ever again. I _can't_ be that powerless again."

"Fury?"

"He helped," she replied with a small shrug. "He said I needed to get my head from my ass."

Clint chuckled before nodding slowly, "Not sure if there's any hot water left, but you know where everything is…Laura has a hint of what happened so don't be surprised if she's in there baking herself into a tizzy. You know how she is."

"If she's anything like she was when you all stayed with me then I know to duck and cover," She smiled, her hands clenching and unclenching at her side before she stepped forward and threw her arms around him, forcing herself not to panic and knowing that this was at the very least, a decent first step. Clint's arms held her and she forced her tears back as her sinuses filled with pressure once more – she was tired of crying for one day. "Thank you…for understanding me when I wasn't really sure how to convey what was wrong."

"Anytime kid…"

The two stayed like that for a few moments before Clint released her, no doubt feeling her muscles tensing and releasing as if she were struggling through another fight or flight response. Alice gave him one final squeeze before pulling away and offering him a weak smile. "I…uh…probably look like a wreck so…"

"You look fine, but I think a shower would do you well," the archer smirked before tossing an arm over her shoulder and leading her back towards the house. Before they had even gotten to the house, Laura was stepping out onto the porch and offering the mutant a relieved smile, stepping onto the grass and meeting the mutant and her husband.

"I'm so glad you're here…" She said softly as she tugged the mutant into a hug, uncaring at the tension that lined Alice's shoulders for a brief moment before feeling her relax against her and smiling when she felt the mutant bow away from her to make room for her swollen stomach. "Nat just got out of the shower and she said that the water's cold…I'm sorry, I know how much you hate it."

Alice nuzzled her nose into Laura's shoulder and shook her head, "No, that's okay…I'm sorry if I worried you."

"Don't you dare apologize to me," The woman hushed her sternly, pulling away and wiping the mutant's still dampened cheeks. "You have nothing to be sorry for, not with things like this." She began guiding Alice back towards the house and they had gotten to the foot of the porch when Steve and Tony's raised voices reached the three of them.

" _Banner and I were doing research!_ " Tony's voice echoed across the yard and the couple shared a look. Laura's clearly stated: _see I told you so_ and Clint's replied expression read: _I hate it when you're right._ Another axe falling into the stump followed the statement as Steve split another log.

" _That would_ _ **affect**_ _the team_."

" _That would_ _ **end**_ _the team!_ " Tony cried in exasperation," _Isn't that the mission? Isn't that the "why" we fight, so we get to end the fight,_ _ **so we get to go**_ _ **home**_ _!?_ "

Steve ripped the log in half with his bare hands.

" _Every time someone tries to win a war before it starts, innocent people die._ _ **Every time**_."

Clint glanced at his wife who shook her head, "I got this, honey. Get Alice and the kids inside."

"Yes ma'am."

Laura approached the two men with little problem and with a fire in her stance that nearly made the mutant laugh. No one was as clever or tenacious as Laura Barton when it came to squashing quarrels.

" _I'm sorry,_ " she had interrupted in the space it took for Tony to potentially reply to the angered patriot and smiling sweetly at them, " _Mr. Stark, uh, Clint said you wouldn't mind, but our tractor…it doesn't seem to want to start at all. I thought you might…_ "

Alice glanced back at her two teammates with concern before she was steered into the foyer of the Barton home. She didn't need further encouragement to head upstairs to the bathroom and upon stepping into the guest bedroom she found her emergency bag (the team always kept one in case they needed civilian clothes for undercover missions) sitting neatly on the bed as well as a robe and a few towels. She found herself smiling at the gesture before resigning to the cold shower she knew awaited her.

The mutant, while thorough, had made quick work of her shower as the icy water pelted her back and shocking her system. In the end, Alice found she needed something like that in order to bring her completely back to being more present and less contemplative. She was in the middle of attempting to towel dry her hair when the bathroom door was opened and in the doorway stood the robed form of Natasha.

The two women seemed to stare at one another for a moment before Alice abandoned the towel for her hair and met the woman's embrace. It didn't matter that they were both in bathrobes and it definitely didn't matter that Alice had soaking wet hair that clung to both her and Natasha as they hugged. Alice could tell that the former spy had gotten out of the shower only shortly before she had arrived as her own hair was still damp and in the silence of the guest bathroom the two women said a thousand and one things to one another. Of the team they had been hit the hardest and of the team they had similar nightmares and similar stories though they were vastly different at the same time.

Trauma was not measured in comparison to trauma, after all.

Natasha didn't care that the mutant seemed to cling to her because she knew she clung just as tightly. Moments stretched and finally the two women pulled away from one another, meeting the other's gaze and understanding passed between them. Alice was the first to break the silence with a small snort.

"God we're messed up aren't we?"

Natasha chuckled, briefly wiping her eyes (which Alice would forever deny having seen), "Yeah…turns out I didn't lock everything away as carefully as I thought."

"You're not the only one…I can't guarantee pleasantness next time I see that kid."

"Somehow, I don't think you're the only one."

Alice's brow quirked suddenly as she read the woman's expression; something was off about it. "Are…are you okay?"

"As much as I always am." The wall was slammed down and Alice knew better than to pursue the conversation further. If Natasha wanted to talk she would.

"I'm sorry…that…that was a stupid question."

"No, it wasn't." Natasha sighed softly before taking the comb from Alice's hand and beginning to work her way through the damp tresses. The mutant immediately knew what the woman saw and allowed her the familiar motions of her experience in the Red Room.

Natasha was surprisingly girly. She enjoyed playing with people's hair, doing at home manicures and pedicures and she enjoyed brighter colors that Alice never would have thought the woman would like based on her wardrobe. It was no secret, but not a well-known fact that Natasha's favorite color was lavender and any time the woman wanted to do anything remotely feminine, Alice was never one to tell her no. While Alice had developed an eclectic style of sort, she was still a sucker for girl time and while she never mentioned it to Natasha she always enjoyed having her hair played with.

Alice cleared her throat to gain the Russian's attention, offering the woman a smile through the mirror, "You know…this reminds me of when I was young…before I knew what I was."

"What do you mean?"

The mutant glanced down at her healed hand and fingertips and sighed softly through her nose, "Growing up I had two sisters. Catherine was four years older than me and Mary was two years younger than me. My mother, at the time, had encouraged us to take care of one another and that included dressing and our hair. Both my sisters had beautiful blonde hair…like sunshine in a wheat field, shimmering and gold. They were always so beautiful and they always enjoyed the finery that came with being women during Colonial America…they wanted so desperately to fall in love and be spirited away. I was the oddball in the family."

Natasha hummed as she brushed through the mutant's wavy hair before beginning to weave the strands into a braid – Alice knew this would happen a few times as the former spy was merely playing with the strands and not actively looking for a style just yet – her eyes meeting Alice's in the mirror, "You said you had a brother too, right?"

"Will, yes. He was so much older than me and Catherine…ten years older than me at any rate, but he was my best friend. It wasn't particularly looked well upon to have a girl that was loud or outspoken especially from a girl growing up in the upper class society. My brother tended to take the heat for things I did in order to preserve my character. I wanted so desperately to be anything but a girl…he would give me his hand-me-downs to hide away for when we would go exploring…it was almost like he knew me better than I did."

"You sound like you were close."

"Yes," The mutant smiled softly at the memory of her older brother. "He was handsome, too. Could have had any picking of women and he certainly was not shy about his…affections. One very such lady was actually Abigail Adams for a time."

"Adams…as in the President?"

"The very same…though she was not an _Adams_ at the time," Alice chuckled, her eyes closing as Natasha's nails dragged across her scalp as the woman continued to play. "Her surname when my brother had her fancy was Smith and I remember hoping the two would end up together because they were so sweet on one another. Will was…well I suppose he was more like I was."

"What'd you mean?"

"I mean that he and I were… _different_ than my sisters. I'm the only one in my family with brown eyes, for example and my skin is more…tanned than theirs ever was, though my brother and I looked more alike than I did with my sisters, yet they all shared the same eyes. An impossible shade of green…like moss or sage. I remember always envying them for their eyes."

Natasha frowned softly, "Your eyes are so unique…why would you want their eyes?"

"Trust me I'm much more confident in myself now than I was back then. "Alice smirked and meeting Natasha's eyes once again, "I was odd. I didn't learn like my sisters did and I certainly didn't take to etiquette like they did…but at the end of the day, we would sit on the bed and take turns combing and braiding each other's hair…it was nice and this kinda reminds me of that."

"Are you saying you like me playing with your hair?" Natasha asked with a smile in her voice that Alice didn't need to see to be able to tell that her lips were quirked into a cat-like smirk. The mutant's nod was the former spy's only answer.

Finally the woman seemed to settle on a style, perhaps because Alice's hair was beginning to dry out. The mutant stood before turning and motioning for Natasha to sit and the woman's brow furrowed deeply before hesitantly sitting before her. "You did me, now it's your turn."

At first Natasha sat stiffly, her back perfectly straight and her muscles tense. It didn't miss the mutant's notice that the redhead rung her hands together almost as if she was nervous. Alice noted each movement and slowly began working the comb (that she knew belonged to the woman) through the steadily drying curls. Natasha's hair had a much different curl pattern than Alice's did. Where the mutant's hair fell into a natural beach wave with few truly defined curls, Natasha's hair curled into loose springs that retained their bounce throughout the day and the mutant didn't doubt that it was thanks to her hair products. She gently combed the auburn coils and helping them form shape by twisting the curl through the comb and helping it form and she massaged the woman's scalp as she did.

"Tell me more about them?"

Alice was brought back into focus suddenly as he looked at the woman in the mirror and smiled softly, "My family you mean?" Natasha nodded slowly, looking as if she was debating whether or not to run from the room and the mutant decided to oblige her – clearly the woman needed the distraction just as she had. "Well…my father was a wonderful man, handsome in his own right and jovial. He and my mother were very connected with the higher echelons of society. My mother…well, she was my mother to a degree I suppose, I wouldn't really know to be honest."

Natasha's brow arched in silent question and drawing a shrug from the mutant.

"She raised me, but she spent much more of her time grooming my sisters than she did with me. She wasn't a terrible mother…neglectful in some cases and stricter in others, but never abusively so," she sighed. "I spent most of my time, whenever possible, with my father and my brother. It was a strange dynamic, but it wasn't terrible by any means. When the Revolution began my mother didn't want me to have any part in it, nearly fainted when she found out that I had been disguising myself as a man in order to join. My brother and my mutual friend, Hercules Mulligan, introduced me to the Marquis de Lafayette and with enough convincing I was able to go to Boston…I assume it was an easier way for my mother to pretend that I wasn't a reflection of her."

Natasha was quiet for a time, relaxing steadily under Alice's light ministration as she styled the woman's hair and before long she began to speak. "Remember how…after D.C. I left for a hiatus?"

"Of course I do," Alice nodded as she scrunched Natasha's curls in her hand to give them definition. "You went back to Russia to dismantle the Red Room."

"Well afterwards I went looking for my parents…never had any siblings to my knowledge, but..." She drew off softly with a sigh. "Two little grave stones by a chain link fence. I pulled some weeds and left some flowers. I guess I realized that we have what we have when we have it…"

Alice hummed in thought before glancing at Natasha from the mirror and meeting her eyes steadily, "Is that why you decided to take a chance…with Bruce?"

The woman smiled, though there was no humor to be found in the expression and Alice's brows furrowed in confusion. "You've been a spy before…surely you haven't made decisions to use that to have an advantage?"

"Not necessarily with people I've come to rely on as family, Nat…why do you say that?"

The woman fell silent for a moment before patting Alice's hand in a sign that she was planning to stand up and the mutant stepped back to give her room. Natasha's arms encircled herself as her gaze focused on the tile floor beneath them as if the rug that covered the blue tiles were suddenly the most interesting thing in the world. The mutant read the expression easily enough as it had been one she had worn frequently over the last few months – nearly a year after making the decision to choose Bucky over her small family: shame or at the very least acquiescence.

"In the Red Room we were trained to…get close to a target a certain way," She began with a small hitched breath. "We flirt, we seduce and lure them into a false sense of security as a way to manipulate the targets thoughts, and feelings…we were taught to use our sexuality. When no one else on the team seemed to be able to bring out the Hulk and put him in and bring Bruce back out…I don't like doing it and even more I hate that it's with a teammate, but…I don't like playing little mind games on people I consider friends," Natasha finally said after a pregnant pause. "If my feelings are true I tend to be more straightforward."

"I can understand that…it doesn't mean that you don't feel anything for him."

Natasha was silent for a long while, allowing Alice to continue styling her hair. The two didn't speak and neither of them needed to. After the events of Washington, the mutant and former spy had become close enough that they had an easy understanding of the other. They knew a good amount about each other and the mutant knew not to squander that luxury. Alice was pulled from her thoughts when the Russian cleared her throat and meeting her eyes in the mirror, the mutant quirked a brow in inquiry.

"I never did ask, but are you okay?"

Alice shrugged, willing to let the previous conversation drop, "I will be. It'll take time and I doubt anyone on the team was expecting, well, any of _this_."

"No, we definitely weren't, but…I'll leave you to get dressed. I'm sure Laura is going to need some help and I'd rather keep busy over the next few hours. I know I've done more than enough thinking on the past for the day."

The mutant nodded slowly before offering the woman a small smile, "Thank you, Nat. I think I needed this more than I realized…we should do stuff like this more often."

Natasha shot the woman a smirk, "I'm certainly not against it."

Alice watched as the woman turned and left the room, assumedly to get herself dressed and leaving the mutant to her own devices. After a moment of silence, the mutant stepped into the guest room and pulled her clothes out of her bag, examining the black skinny jeans, white collared blouse and dusty purple crew neck sweatshirt. Alice was quick to dress in the outfit, blousing the oversized sweatshirt to flatter her body shape and fixing the collar of her blouse to rest outside of the sweatshirts neck and adjusting her necklace, tracing the flat edge of the coin attached there. Instead of leaving the comfort of the room, Alice found herself sitting on the edge of the bed, her eyes staring sightlessly out the window and over the fields behind the Barton household. She sat there for a time considering everything that Fury had told her and their conversation.

"Auntie Allie?"

Alice was brought from her reverie by the sound of Cooper's voice, the young boy standing in the doorway and shuffling his feet. The mutant was quick to stand and move closer to the child with a quirked brow and a small smile on her face. "What's up Coop?"

The boy seemed to consider his words before looking up at her with a determined line to his mouth, his hazel eyes met her own and he frowned, "I heard mom and dad talking and they said something happened to you and Auntie Nat…"

"Oh, honey…"

"You said that you'd protect us, but we wanna protect you too!"

Alice's face softened and she smiled, opening her arms as the boy stood in front of her with an unwavering line to his back, "Come here." He didn't need further encouragement as he threw his arms around her waist and pressed his face into her stomach and the mutant felt her heart swell in her chest.

Cooper was extroverted and astoundingly self-assured, patient, kind and surprisingly sensitive. He felt things strongly and while he tended to be more willing to go with the flow of things, when he felt something wasn't right or that something was off, he tended to be more vocal to bring attention to it. His level of perception had always surprised Alice, but she assumed that came from his father who had been born with an uncannily enhanced ability of spatial awareness. Alice and Clint had actually checked to see if the archer was a mutant a year ago because she didn't believe that his ability to hit literally anything was from training alone, finding that Clint was not a mutant nor did he have a dormant X-gene, but somehow had the incredible ability to use any tool to hit any target. She supposed his ability had been passed to his children as Cooper was unusually sensitive to his surroundings and even Lila was terrifyingly perceptive.

After a few moments, the mutant kneeled in front of him, cupping his cheek with a small smile and wiping the tears from the boy's face. "Coop, I can promise you one thing in this life: I will _always_ come back. No matter where I am, what I'm doing, I'll always be here." She pulled away slightly and cupped his face, her hands brushing his shaggy hair from his forehead, "Believe me when I say that you're already doing it…protecting me."

"It doesn't feel like it," Cooper sniffled with a disgruntled look on his face.

"Sometimes it won't feel like it," she agreed with a nod. "But protecting isn't always something that's physical. You protect Lila when someone bullies her right?" When he nodded the mutant smiled softly. "That's a form of protection that isn't physical. When you love someone you protect them from pain and sometimes, Coop, that's all anyone needs."

"But you, dad and Auntie Nat fight to protect others!" The nine year old frowned, his brows furrowed tightly over his eyes. "You fight to protect us!"

"You're right," Alice nodded, her hands resting on his shoulders and squeezing them gently. "We do fight to protect others, but that's not the only way to protect someone. I once heard someone say that: _the warrior, for us, is one who sacrifices himself for the good of others. His task is to take care of the elderly, the defenseless, those who cannot provide for themselves, and above all, the children, the future of humanity._ "

"Who said that?"

"His name was Sitting Bull. He was a Hunkpapa Lakota chief and spiritual leader who united the Sioux Tribes of the Great Plains against the U.S. Government who was trying to take their tribal land because they discovered gold there." She explained with a nod. "He was a very wise man and a fierce warrior. He didn't believe in fighting unless it was absolutely necessary and only as a last resort. And what he means in that quote is that fighting is not the only way to defend or protect those you care about." Her voice trailed off suddenly as understanding seemed to hit her and she looked back up at him with a fire licking in her soul once more. "It's how you treat others; it's how you look out for those who can't always defend themselves. It's little things that you fill in to make a big picture."

Cooper's mouth split into a smile, "Like a puzzle!"

"Exactly like a puzzle," She nodded. "Does that make sense?"

"Yeah, it does…Auntie Allie?"

"Yeah?"

"I wanna protect you and mom, and Lila and dad and Nate!" It took a moment for Alice to realize that the nine year old was referencing the baby that Laura was carrying and a wide smile quirked her lips upwards. "I wanna protect loads of people!"

She pressed a kiss to his cheek, "It's hard work, but I know you can do it."

"Thanks," He smiled slightly before looking back up at her. "Do you think you can teach me that trick you do on Hummer?"

Alice threw her head back into a laugh and smiled at the little boy who had rekindled the fire of hope in her heart with his unfailing love and loyalty before patting his shoulder, "Maybe when you're a little older, Sport."

"Aw man!"

"Go on outside to the barn and I'll help you and Lila ride for a while, deal?"

"Deal! I'll get my boots! Lila, Lila, Lila! Get your boots on! Auntie Alice is gonna help us ride for a while!" He cried as he raced from the room and the mutant couldn't help the smile that spread across her face before it softened.

"Thank you Cooper, for reminding me what I need to do," she whispered in the silence of the room before grabbing her boots and tugging them onto her feet.

**-0-**

Steve was irritated as he continued splitting wood in Tony's absence.

He was very aware of the fact that Laura Barton had separated the two of them on purpose and while he felt embarrassment for his actions, he also felt annoyance. He was tired of being lied to and he was tired of always assuming the team had their best interests at heart when they did anything.

Clint hid a family.

Natasha hid her past.

Bruce had helped Tony create Ultron.

Thor refused to explain what he had seen that could potentially give them answers.

Tony hid _everything_ behind the farce of good intentions and creating Ultron had not helped Steve's opinion of that.

Alice…he sighed slightly and ran a hand through his hair. Alice had been hiding _something_ for the last few months.

He was used to the mutant at least sharing her concerns and her thoughts with him, but especially recently she had closed herself off. She had gone from warm and inviting back to being cold and aloof as she had back when she had been brought in on the Tesseract business. It was a weird whiplashing that he hadn't been expecting. He had assumed that it was from what had happened to her in Washington and maybe he had come on too strong with his concern – maybe she blamed him. He didn't know the answer, but there were instances when the old Alice would come back out and he would see his friend and there were some days where she ignored everyone and everything. He was no stranger to needing space, but he was tired of the constant hot and cold.

He looked up as the front door of the Barton household was opened and Clint's kids came rushing out, practically dragging a pliable Alice with them. She had cleaned up and gotten dressed in her civilian clothes and she looked much better than she had upon reappearing from wherever she had gone to hide. He could see the shadows that filtered around her face as well as the haunted expression she wore when she thought no one was looking, but there was a fire to her suddenly – as if her hope was somewhat restored. Clint's daughter grabbed the mutant's hand and smiled up at her and it became very clear to Steve who the true savior for Alice had been.

He watched as the mutant helped the archer's children saddle the two horses, instructing them with gentle words and encouraging them as they answered questions the woman asked them. Abandoning his wood pile, the patriot ambled closer to the three to hear that the mutant was showing them the different parts of the saddle.

"And what's this part here?" Alice was asking as she looked at the two kids, holding a third saddle aloft in her hands and gesturing to the piece of leather that hung down from the saddle with a stirrup attached. The siblings looked at one another for a moment before the boy answered.

"It's the fender," Alice nodded with a smile.

"Right, and this part here?"

"That's the cantle!"

The mutant winked at the little girl before putting the extra saddle back on the post and glancing back at Steve, "Lookin' to get a lesson in?"

"Nah, I'm set." He smiled and raising a hand in surrender. "I hope you don't mind me watching."

Alice sent a sly look to the kids, her eyebrows arching beneath her fringe, "What do you two think? Let Captain America watch you ride?"

Lila seemed to mold into Alice's side and offering a shy nod and Cooper grinned widely, "Yeah!"

"Well I suppose you're allowed to hang out then, but you're gonna have to help me real quick," The mutant directed to Steve before walking towards the first horse standing tall, much taller than Alice was, and patting the animal's neck as she took the reins. The horse stood at 16 hands, which Steve quickly calculated was about 6 feet tall, and was a beautiful shade of onyx black with speckles of white that bled from between the horse's eye and down to its hind quarter. She led the horse to where the boy stood, before glancing at Steve. "Do you mind holding the reigns for me? Hummer's a good horse, but I'd prefer not lifting a kid into the air and the horse deciding that grass is much more interesting."

Steve glanced between the large animal and the mutant before climbing over the fence and joining them. The patriot had never really been around horses until he began visiting Alice's business and home in Virginia after she moved from Boston. There was still fear when he saw them, something he doubted he'd ever really overcome and a small piece left over from his pre-serum days. He looked at the horse for a moment, the animal's ears flicking this way and that as the mutant handed him the reins.

"Hold his halter, here," She gestured to the blue material that stretched on either side of the horse's face and across his nose and ears, "Great. This way you have more control of his head. Take a deep breath, Steve…they sense when someone's afraid of them." She guided the man's hand to where it needed to be before scratching behind the horse's ear, "Good boy, Hummer. Be nice to Steve okay?" The animal snorted, bobbing his head as if waiting to be scratched more before settling as the mutant stepped away from them and back towards Clint's son. "Ready?"

"Yeah!"

"Remember what I said," Alice instructed as she raised the boy up and helped him fit his foot into the stirrup. "Hummer can sense your energy. If you want him to be calm, you need to be calm too. I know you're excited, but we want to go easy today okay?"

"Are you gonna ride afterwards, Auntie Al?"

The mutant shot a look at the younger child and smiled, "Only if you do well during the lesson, okay?"

"Sure."

After making sure Cooper was settled on top of the saddle and was holding the horn, the mutant stepped back to where she had left Steve to see that he was talking to the horse, a note of nervousness to his voice as he did and earning a small smile from the mutant. "They listen you know…they're one of the smartest animals in the world. Kinda like cats if I'm being honest."

"What do you mean?"

"Well," She nodded slowly and stroking the horse's neck with a smile, "everything is about consent. If you pay close attention, horses use their body to tell you what they need. See how his ears are turning?"

"Yeah."

"He's listening to everything happening around us. They're pointed forward at the moment because we're at his head, but his ears keep going backwards to listen for Cooper. They're smart animals and they're more like us than we'd ever care to admit…" She drew off slightly before shaking her head and holding out her hand and gesturing to the reins still in the patriot's hand. Steve turned them over willingly and stepped back to watch Alice hand the reins up to Cooper. After a few words, she stepped with the horse as Cooper gave the horse the signal to move.

As the two worked through the ring, the mutant giving the horse and child enough room to bond without her immediate interference, Steve felt a tug at his side and looked down to see Clint's daughter standing there. He quickly reached down when she began climbing the fence – her dress replaced with a pair of pants for riding – and made sure she scaled the wooden surface safely. Lila looked up at the man before offering him a shy smile.

"You're Auntie Allie's friend Steve?"

Steve offered the girl a small smile and a nod, "Yeah, I'm her friend."

"My name is Lila," she stated immediately. "Auntie Allie talks about you and daddy a lot."

"Is that so?" Steve chuckled as he leaned back on the fence beside the girl. "Anything good?"

"Well, we got to stay with Auntie Allie for a while at her house last summer and she taught me and Cooper how to ride. She said that daddy is smothering, but I think she likes it because she didn't ask us to leave. And I think she said that you were nice. I hope so because Auntie Allie is really nice! She gave us Silvy and Hummer!"

"Silvy is your horse?"

"Yeah!" She nodded enthusiastically with a smile, "She's the Lipozanian over there!"

Steve followed where the girl pointed to see another horse wearing a pink halter around its face with a silver coat. The horse's front was speckled with grey that seemed to spot against the white and mirrored the same pattern on the horse's rear. Around its eyes were darker patches of grey, almost like charcoal, that matched its snout and socks.

"She's really pretty."

"Thanks," she smiled shyly before looking back up at him. "Silvy is her nickname though. Her real name is Quicksilver, but Auntie Allie said that Silvy was a good name for her instead. And Silvy knows her name _and_ her nickname."

"Alice said they were smart."

"So, so, _so_ smart!" Lila agreed with a giggle. "One day I want to be able to ride like Auntie Allie. She doesn't use a saddle and she can shoot arrows like daddy at the same time!"

Steve's eyebrows quirked towards his hairline, "Is that so?"

"Yeah! She's really, really good! But she and mommy say I can't try it until I get really good and until I get bigger."

Steve couldn't help the smile that stretched his cheeks in amusement at the small girl, his eyes glancing briefly to see that Alice was nearly jogging in a circle as she followed Cooper's movements atop of Hummer. He then looked down at the little girl once more, "And how'd Hummer get his name?"

"Auntie Allie said that he was like a tank and couldn't figure out what to name him…Cooper came up with the name."

"Well you got to give your horse a nickname, that's pretty cool."

Lila smiled up at him, "Yeah. Hummer's really nice too, but he's so big!"

"He is, but so is Silvy." Steve nudged the little girl slightly and earning a smile from her.

Lila paused for a moment as she watched the mutant working through paces with Hummer and Cooper before she turned her eyes up to the patriot, "Auntie Allie has a horse that only she's allowed to ride. She told me and Cooper that he's too big for us. His name is Hidalgo and he's _really_ big, but he's so pretty!"

"What does he look like?"

"He's got a black nose, hair, tail and socks and he's got pretty orange fur! Auntie Allie says he's too advanced for us. He got out once and she jumped on him without a saddle and without reins…it was hard to get him back in the barn, even daddy had to try and help, but he's nice sometimes and really protective too!"

Steve recalled the instance the child was talking about as it had been one that Alice had told him about. The horse in question she had named after the horse from Frank Hopkins' book about his race in the Arabian Peninsula. She had called him when the horse had come in and she had explained that he had what she called wild blood and it had taken her quite a lot of time to gain the horse's trust. He remembered seeing the animal the last time he had visited the mutant's farm, the horse having raced them on the long drive to her house. He was a willful creature and ironically reminded Steve of Alice herself. He looked back down at the six year old after a moment before nudging her to gain her attention once more.

"Can I tell you a secret?" The patriot was almost concerned with the way her head snapped to him, her brown eyes wide at the prospect of a secret and he nearly laughed. It was clear she had adopted some of Alice's mannerisms and he leaned closer to share the secret. "I'm actually really scared of horses."

"That's silly," Lila announced bluntly and Steve's lips quirked. "Captain America can't be scared of horses…now spiders are _scary_."

"It's true." He insisted earning another laugh from the six year old. "Captain America is scared of a lot of things."

"But you fought aliens!"

"I'm definitely not a fan of those," Steve admitted with another smile. "But I get scared all the time."

"I do to," Lila admitted with a small frown. "The boys in school call me a scaredy-cat. I really don't like spiders, I definitely don't like the dark and I don't like thunder."

"I can promise you those boys are afraid of things too," Steve stated with a serious expression as he looked down at her, studying her face. "They're just mean because they don't want to admit that they're scared too. It's okay to be afraid, you know? Even grown-ups are afraid…but don't you let it get to you because I think you're really brave!"

"Brave?"

"You can ride horses," Steve reasoned with a nod and gesturing to where Alice was slowing both horse and child so that they could switch out and give Lila a turn. "You ride horses and you take care of your family…I bet you protect Alice too."

"Well she's my special person," Lila stated as if it were obvious. "But I get to scared all the time."

"Can I tell you another secret?" When she nodded he leaned back down to her, "I'm always scared…I'm scared of grown-up things like living on my own and hurting people I love, but I'm scared of little things too. I'm scared of taxis and of horses…and I'm especially scared of your Aunt."

"Which one?" Lila giggled when Steve pitched his voice when he reached the part about her and Cooper's aunt.

The patriot laughed, "Both of them."

As Alice approached Steve made a shushing motion at Lila and sent her a wink that sent the little girl into peals of giggles. She looked between the two of them before shaking her head, "Telling secrets over here?"

"Not us, Auntie Allie!" The six year old smiled widely at the mutant before looking up at Steve, "Uncle America was talking to me about Silvy!"

The mutant and patriot shared a look before Alice swallowed her laugher: _Uncle America_ was going to stick and suddenly Steve regretted talking to the young girl as she sent him an innocently dazzling smile. After a moment the mutant glanced at her, "Oh and what did _Uncle America_ ask about Silvy?"

"You know what, Al?"

Alice's brow arched in question before a smirk quirked at her lips, her attention turned back to Lila as she told her what she had told Steve earning another laugh. "Silvy's breed is Lipizzaner, but you were so close!"

"It's a hard word," Lila pouted before squealing out a laugh as Alice snatched her from the fence and swinging her to her hip. "I did good, right?"

"You did great, Tater Tot."

Alice did the same for Lila as she did for Cooper, leading Silvy through the ring and switching between trots and cantors and allowing the animal to get the appropriate exercise while also teaching Lila how to switch between the two paces. Lila had taken to horseback riding much easier than Cooper had initially, but both were enthusiastic leaners and so teaching them was something that was very easy and enjoyable. After she was done she removed the horse's saddles and helped the siblings brush the animals down before Cooper asked her the question that she had been hoping her would forget.

"So can you show us how you ride, Auntie Allie?"

The mutant considered the request for a moment before sighing and nodding slowly, "Alright."

"Can you do it with the arrow and bow like daddy does!?"

Alice's head bowed in resignation before she shrugged, "Alright, go grab me the bow from the garage…you remember which one right?"

"Yeah!"

The mutant watched as Cooper and Lila raced off, calling his dad as he did to help him find the equipment his aunt had asked for. She turned her eyes to Steve to see concern there and she smiled, "You don't have to worry. I've done this so much it's second nature, I was just hoping to avoid this today, but clearly my niece and nephew are spoiled." She said the last part louder in the direction both children had gone earning laughs from both.

"You're good with them."

Alice glanced back up at the man to see that he was being honest and she sighed, "You remember me telling you how I always wanted some of my own right?" When he nodded she frowned. "I don't know what you saw and I won't ask, but I can tell you right now that if I see the Maximoff girl again I'm not playing nice. It was a legitimate nightmare…I…" She drew off with a hitched breath before frowning. "The things she made me see are things I swore to never become again, situations I'd never let myself get placed in again…"

"The lab?"

"Among other things," Alice sighed deeply as she crossed her arms, removing the braid Natasha had done and fluffing her hair once more. "I saw Bucky…the lab…and I saw the team and those two kids dead because of me." She glanced at him to see that Steve's postured had become less defensive, his features twisting into one of sympathy before changing into one of concern. She preferred the latter to the former and it must have shown on her face because Steve raised his hands in a sign of surrender.

"I saw Peggy," Steve sighed softly as he leaned heavily against the fence, watching as Lila's horse bumped into the mutant's back and the woman turned, petting the horse's snout as she listened. "It was a celebration…the one we knew would happen after the war was over?" Alice nodded in understanding, the two of them, the Commandos and every other man and woman in the military had spoken of the celebrations they would have should the war end – the mutant skipping out on all but the one with the Commandos. "It was in a dance hall and it was a celebration but…the dancers all looked like they were fighting; a man spilled wine on his shirt and all I saw was a bullet wound; cymbals crashed and I thought it was a mortar…and then I saw Peggy…she was _beautiful_ Al…like I always imagined her. She, um…asked me to dance and then said that the war was over…that we could go home."

Alice listened raptly as the man spoke, his expressions shuttering between being open to being conflicted to back again. Steve was still very much dealing with left over PTSD from the war and instead of managing that he threw himself back into being an Avenger, into being an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. Alice sighed softly before meeting his eyes as she cleared her throat, "It sounds to me like…you're afraid of what happens after war, Steve. Like all you're meant for is fighting and war and that's not true. You're so much more than a tool of war."

"I…I don't know…Then Tony wanting to end the team by creating Ultron? It's just too much."

Alice ran a hand through her loose hair and frowned softly, "We don't know what the motivation behind that decision was Steve…he was in the base alone for a time and we had lost sight of the Enhanced. What if…" She sighed through her nose, "what if they got to him, like she got to us?"

"That's not an excuse and you and I both know that," Steve sighed, his eyes narrowing at her slightly. "We both know what happens when people try to stop a war before it starts."

"I do," Alice nodded before leveling him with a stern glare, "but we can't discount the fears of others. I'm not saying that Tony was right and I'm _not_ saying that you're wrong. What I'm saying is that if we start pointing fingers and accusing each other we're no longer a united front. We're weak and we can't afford to be that way. Right now Ultron has us _exactly_ where he wants us…shaken up and on the run and all it's doing is giving him time for whatever it is he has planned and I don't know about you, but the fact that he has a boatload of vibranium is not easing my discomfort any."

Steve opened his mouth to rebuke her statement, but Cooper and Lila had returned with Clint who held a bow and arrow aloft in his hands. "You two good?"

"We're fine," Alice answered with a tired smile, "just…discussing our situation."

"Well make this show on the quicker side," Clint motioned to the bow in her hand. "Fury's inside and wants to talk to us."

"Fury's here?"

Alice glanced from Clint to Steve before nodding slowly.

"He, um, talked me out of my funk earlier…doubt that's what he was here for." She ignored the look Steve leveled her with before glancing down at the kids. "So, who do you think I should ride? Hummer or Silvy?"

"Hummer!" Cooper and Lila chorused after a moment of rock, paper, and scissors to decide and the mutant grinned down at them before tossing herself back over the fence with the bow and arrows in her hand.

With the grace of an experienced rider, Alice swung herself onto the horses back and adjusting herself. The horse's feet shuffled for a moment before steadying as the mutant patted the side of the animal's strong neck and scratching between his ears. Steve noted that the horse's ears were turned back towards her and clearly listening as the woman spoke to him in soft tones he couldn't catch. She tossed the quiver over her shoulder and adjusted the bow before she seemed to clench her calves into the horse's side and the two began moving in a trot. Alice did the motion once more and urging the horse into cantor and quickly into a full gallop. She guided the horse by shifting her weight and using her knees to keep her balanced, the mutant had to adjust every now and then and it was clear that she was used to the trust built between her own horse and herself and that while Hummer was pliant to the directions, he wasn't as used to a rider without a saddle. The mutant strung an arrow into the bow and waited for the next rotation around the large pen and as soon as she saw the target she aimed and took a shot hitting the outermost rung of the circular target. It wasn't a perfect shot, but Alice didn't mind as she slowed the horse, stringing the bow over her shoulder and using light tugs at the horse's mane to tell him where to turn and where to go as she slowed him back into a walk and allowing the horse to breathe.

"That was _so cool_!" Cooper grinned as Lila nodded excitedly.

"Can you teach us that?"

"Maybe when you're older," Alice laughed as she vaulted from the horse's back and patting Hummer's neck as she did. "And maybe if your mom and dad will let me."

"Oh it's not me you have to convince," Clint laughed as he accepted the bow and quiver from the mutant. "Your aim needs work though."

Alice snorted, "Not all of us can _always_ hit the target. I haven't done anything like that since the 1800's."

Steve watched the two before he offered the mutant a small smile, "That was impressive."

"Well, when you've got nearly a hundred years in equine experience alone, it looks pretty easy. My old teacher…the one who taught me about plant work and herbalism taught me how back in 1768. She was an incredible rider." The mutant chuckled. There was a weighted look shared between the two and it was clear that their previous conversation was far from over, but for the sake of Clint and his children they would allow it to drop. She glanced back at Clint and shrugged, "So, team meeting?"

"I guess so…I know Laura's working on dinner now so we'll probably do everything over food." The archer shrugged and running a hand through his hair, "Last I saw she was making a chicken and hominy stew."

"I love your wife…she knows, but now you know." Alice grinned, the jest not lost on the archer as he threw his head back and laughed.

While the Bartons had stayed with Alice after Washington, Laura had been looking around the mutant's kitchen and came across one of the many cookbooks that she kept in her cabinet. After asking the mutant about what type of foods that she liked, Alice had admitted that she kept her cookbooks from different periods of her life because she tended to miss the way food was prepared and one such dish was hominy and greens. Alice had explained to Laura that it was a dish she used to eat during the Revolutionary War and was a guilty pleasure of hers, but it was rare she got to enjoy it. The Barton matriarch had wasted no time in making the dish in an effort to cheer her up.

Alice wasted very little time as she headed back towards the house, Cooper and Lila's hands held in hers as the two kids began talking in rapid succession with the mutant. Steve and Clint watched for a moment longer before Steve was startled from his thoughts as the archer patted his back with a smile. "C'mon…better grab some grub before she eats it all and given the circumstances I wouldn't be surprised."

"How do you do it?"

"Do what, Cap?"

"Read her so well?" Steve sighed as his hands found his hips. "I think I know everything about her and then I realize I know nothing at all."

Clint studied the patriot for a moment before sighing. "The easiest way to read Alice is to watch what she does. She doesn't say anything…she doesn't trust people enough to do that…she tells you everything by the actions she takes. Look, I know you two are havin' a weird rough patch with your friendship and everything, but stop overanalyzing her so much. You don't need to know everything about her and you don't need to know everything that she does…she has everyone's best interest at heart and I think you doubt her too much." He frowned, "I don't know what happened between you two in the 40's to make you not trust that, but that was seventy years ago. May not be that way for you, but seventy years is a lot of time to change and it's clear that she's changed from whatever you thought she was back then. Start giving her the benefit of the doubt."

Steve stared at the man for a moment before sighing though his nose, his lips quirking at the corners, "You sound like you're her dad."

"May as well be…" Clint frowned as he crossed his arms. "If we didn't impose on her a year ago, I never would have known what was going on. You think you've seen all of it, but you're only seeing the tail end of it. The nightmares, the panic attacks, the anxiety attacks…it was even worse back then and that was when she couldn't move around as well to work off the excess energy. Look, I'm just reminding you that not everyone here is perfect, Cap…we all have things we'd rather not say and things we'd rather not talk about and Alice is allowed her secrets."

Steve frowned as Clint patted his arm and began making for the house before sighing. Was he being so hypercritical that he was pushing her away? He wasn't sure, but he knew that if Bucky could see them now, there was no doubt in his mind that the former soldier would not necessarily be impressed with how their friendship had seemingly dissolved. He had promised Bucky that he would try to get along with Alice the morning they had left for the Alps, the sharpshooter making him promise that if anything were to ever happen to him that he would be the one to step in and take care of her. When everything came crashing down around them in D.C. Steve felt immeasurable guilt for what had happened to the mutant and it only became worse when he realized that the one who had hurt her had been Bucky himself, be it of his own volition or not. He was terrified of losing someone else that knew _him_ , who saw _him_ and not the mask of _Captain America_ , but _Steve Rogers_. Suddenly he felt himself worrying that he had pushed her too far away and he decided in that moment that it didn't matter how much it would hurt both of them, they would talk about what was wrong instead of skirting the issue as they had been the last few months.

With that in mind, the patriot sighed and began making his way to the house just as Clint's wife called for dinner.

**-0-**

"Ultron took you folks out of play to buy himself time," Fury stated after the team had eaten.

Clint was doing dishes while simultaneously playing darts with Tony and Laura sat with her children. Alice was seated at the dinner table with Natasha, playing with the edges of the place mat as Natasha's eyes followed her former boss as he paced, glancing briefly to Lila who approached her with something she had been drawing. The Russian pinched her cheek before the girl ran back to where she was drawing with her brother. Steve was leaning against the entryway between the dining room and living room with his arms crossed and watching Fury, his eyes flickering between the former S.H.I.E.L.D director and the mutant and Bruce was leaning against the counter, listening as the man spoke.

"My contacts all say he's building something. The amount of vibranium he made off with, I don't think it's just one thing."

"What about Ultron himself?" Steve questioned after a beat and earning shrug from the former director.

"Ah, he's easy to track. He's everywhere." Fury snorted as he took a bite of toast that Laura had pushed in front of him a few moments before, "Guy's multiplying faster than a Catholic rabbit. Still doesn't help us get any angle on any of his plans though."

Alice frowned, her arms crossing and cupping her chin as she leaned back in her seat, "Well his goal is to solve the world, right? What's to say that he's not trying to do that with the vibranium he stole?"

"He still going after launch codes?" Tony asked after nodding to Alice, following along with her line of thought and moving suddenly out of the way when Clint sent a dart into the bullseye of the target, the man shrugging when the billionaire shot him an unamused glare.

"Yes, he is, but he's not making any headway."

The mutant stared at the man for a moment, her brows knitted together in a tight furrow, "How's that possible?"

"Yeah," Tony nodded with a scoff, "I mean I cracked the Pentagon's firewall in high school on a dare."

"It's not that secure," Alice agreed with a nod before glancing back at Fury. "It was easier to hack than S.H.I.E.L.D was at any rate."

Fury shot her an unappreciative look though his amusement gave way as his lips quirked slightly, "Yeah, well, I contacted our friends as the NEXUS about that."

"NEXUS?"

"It's the world internet hub in Oslo," Bruce answered for the patriot, "every byte of data flows through there, fastest access on Earth."

"So what'd they say," Clint asked as he tossed the dishtowel he had been using to dry over his shoulder, his hands resting on his hips.

"He's fixated on the missiles, but the codes are constantly being changed."

"By who?"

"Yeah seriously!" Alice frowned as she sat straighter in her chair, "I'm no slouch and Ultron absolutely dominated me in the cyber field."

"Parties unknown," Fury chuckled after a moment with a shrug before Natasha cleared her throat.

"Do we have an ally?"

"Ultron's got an enemy, that's not the same thing. Still, I'd pay folding money to know who it is."

The group was silent for a moment before Tony nodded, "I might need to visit Oslo, find our _unknown_."

"Well, this is good times, boss, but I was kind of hoping when I saw you, you'd have more than that."

Fury turned to glance at the former spy, swallowing his toast, "I do! I have you." He sighed after a moment, his eye hardening with determination, "Back in the day, I had eyes everywhere, ears everywhere else. Here we all are, back on Earth, with nothing but our wit and our will to save the world. So stand. Outwit the platinum bastard."

"Steve doesn't like that kind of talk," Natasha hedged with a sly smirk as she looked towards Steve and earning a snort from the mutant as she attempted to hide her smile.

Steve rolled his eyes, "You know what, Romanoff." He didn't miss the mischievous smile as their attention turned back to Fury.

"So what does he want?"

The group thought for a brief moment before the patriot frowned, "To be better…better than us. He keeps building bodies."

"Person bodies. The human form is inefficient, biologically speaking, we're outmoded…but he keeps coming back to it."

Natasha shot a look at both Tony and Bruce, her lips forming a sarcastic smile, "You know, when you two programmed him to protect the human race, you amazingly failed."

Bruce scowled before he looked down at the picture that Lila had drawn to see a flower and a butterfly before realization hit him, "They don't need to be protected…they need to _evolve_. Ultron's going to evolve."

"How?"

Bruce shuffled before shooting the director a look heavily laden with sarcasm before glancing back at the team, "Has anyone been in contact with Helen Cho?"

The group seemed to come to the same conclusion at once as the dining room suddenly lit with action. Alice and Natasha jogged up the stairs to grab their gear just as Clint moved to his and Laura's bedroom to do the same. The two women reappeared, dressed in their suits and Alice passed the patriot his own bag that contained his own gear.

"You're gonna need that shield, you know." She shrugged with a small smirk. Steve took the bag with a returning smile.

"Thanks, Al…look I know I'm not the best at this whole…friendship thing…but when all this is over, do you think we can talk?"

Alice studied him for a moment before nodding slowly, "Sure…we gotta get moving so…"

He took the gear and offered her a smile he hoped conveyed his support before disappearing behind the bathroom door to change into his suit. The group moved quickly as they gathered their things and began to map out a potential plan.

Steve reappeared, meeting Tony and Fury in the foyer, briefly hearing both Alice and Natasha saying goodbye to Clint's kids and his wife before both women were out the door. "I'll take Natasha, Alice and Clint."

"Alright, strictly recon," Tony nodded in agreement before glancing at both men. "I'll hit the NEXUS and join you as soon as I can."

"If Ultron is really building a body…"

"He'll be more powerful than any of us…maybe all of us. An android designed by a robot." Tony shook his head as Steve chuckled dryly.

"You know, I really miss the days when the weirdest thing science ever created was me."

Fury shook his head with a smirk before glancing at both men, "I'll drop Banner off at the tower…do you mind if I borrow Ms. Hill and Ms. Moore?"

"She's all yours," Tony remarked sarcastically, " _apparently._ What're you gonna do?"

The former director only smirked. "Something dramatic…I hope." He then stepped from the house before accepting hugs from both Natasha and Alice, leaning down to murmur in the mutant's ear, "Just remember your promise."

As they pulled apart the mutant nodded with an answering smirk, "I will, Fury. I'll be seein' you."

The man only shook his head with a smile before turning and leaving the women waiting for the remainder of the team and with a flap of his trench coat he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone~ I'll try to keep this note as short as I can considering the extreme length of the chapter...I know that this was a long one and I'm sorry for that, but I couldn't find a good place to really stop that satisfied me. Anyway, there was a LOT of stuff going on here, but I hope you all enjoyed.
> 
> I wanted to make sure you all had a nice chapter to go into the holiday with considering the last chapter was a pretty heavy doozy. If you're wondering, Cooper and Lila's horses are two different breeds. As we know from the chapter, Silvy is a Lipizzaner and Hummer is a Appaloosa. I decided to give Steve some fears, because we don't see him being afraid of a lot and we know pre-serum Steve was around Alice's height (she's five feet tall, give or take an inch depending on what shoes she decides to wear) and I thought it just added some oomph to his character a bit.
> 
> Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed!
> 
> Special thanks to everyone who has viewed, subscribed/followed or favorited this story so far! You guys always make my day and I can't thank you enough for taking time out of your day to read my rendition of the MCU!
> 
> If you haven't already please be sure to check out my friend **simmerandcry's** story "Show Me, Don't Tell Me"! It's an awesome story and she deserves every bit of credit for how incredible her story is! 
> 
> I hope you all have a wonderful holiday, Merry Christmas to those who celebrate it and I may have another chapter ready for you just before New Years! I'll see you all in the next chapter :D
> 
> xoxo EirylsLavellan!


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